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"Dear, it's quite a silly question, I don't think-"
"It's important!" Lance cried, hand quickly covering his girlfriend's mouth and muffling her voice. Allura simply glared at him for a moment before he retracted his hand, a quick "I'm sorry, my love" leaving his mouth as a sheepish smile crossed his face. He placed a chaste kiss on her cheek.
Keith chuckled at his dramatics, leaning subconsciously towards Hunk. The other noticed, though, throwing an arm around his shoulder and pulling him closer. Keith smiled at the touch.
The four friends were at the diner right by their apartment, sitting at the same booth they always chose and ordering their “usuals” for an afternoon snack (consisting of a large plate of fries, a Dr. Pepper for Hunk, a strawberry milkshake for Allura and Lance to share, and for Keith, a “hey just checking again if you have lactose-free milkshakes. No? Ok that’s fine. I’ll get a large chocolate milkshake with extra whip cream.” “Dude.”).
Pidge and Shiro, of course, were invited. Pidge said she’d be late since she was finishing up some robotics project. Shiro was lame and old and said he probably wouldn’t be able to make it since he’s a super busy PhD candidate and stressed to the point that his hair was turning white. Seriously.
"C'mon man, what’s the question?" Hunk laughed, squeezing Keith's shoulder as he did.
"Ok ok ok ok," Lance said dramatically, hands gesturing around frantically as he demanded silence among the group. Allura rolled her eyes, but her giggle gave her away. "Allura and I have been debating this for a while, so it's quite literally life or death. I just need to know that you two won't betray me since you two are my BFFLAFAE, which means 'best friends for life and forever and ever' bee-tee-dubs for those who don’t know, Keith, since you're so bad at lingo-"
"Lance, get on with it," Keith deadpanned, earning a kick against his shin. "Ow."
"Cool it, mullet, I'm getting to it," Lance snapped, though there was no malice in his voice and rather a bright grin on his face. He paused for tension, then inhaled dramatically. "Would you rather...go your entire life and never have sauce again, or never be able to kiss again?"
Keith, genuinely, didn't think he has ever rolled his eyes so hard in his life, which is saying a lot seeing that he's been close friends with Lance for a few years by now. Leave it to him for asking stupid questions he probably saw online.
"Oh...kay," Keith said slowly, pinching the bridge of his nose. "So...Allura was right. That is a silly question. Also the answer's obvious." From the corner of his eye, he saw Hunk nod.
"No sauce," Keith answered easily.
"No kisses," his boyfriend said at the same time.
There was a moment of silence, the four friends staring at each other in shock before all hell broke loose.
"Hunk you traitor I’m revoking your BFFLAFAE status-”
"Keith, my love, what do you mean no sauce-"
"No kisses? You weren't saying that last night when I was leaving kisses all over your-"
"Enough already, can we please settle down?" Allura cut in, her hands waving elegantly in the air to silence the group. They all did, though the betrayed expressions didn't leave any of them. "Let us talk about this calmly and like adults...And also discuss how Keith and Lance somehow are always wrong-"
"Princess, I always think you're right but I’m putting my foot down this time!" Lance cried, standing up in distress, hands slammed on the table. If Keith squinted, he could have sworn he saw a tear in his eye.
"Lance, dear, please you're causing a scene," Allura mumbled, her face red, though she was fighting her giggles at her boyfriend's antics. Lance sat down with a pout, one that softened after she placed a kiss on his cheek, a red lipstick mark now there. She reached down and held his hand beneath the table. A shit-eating grin crossed his face.
"See, you kissed me even though you chose no kissing!" Lance said. Allura took away her hand as she raised an eyebrow.
"I will simply not kiss you anymore, then."
"Wait please don't."
"Ok, but the answer is obviously no sauce, not sure why this is a big deal," Keith butted in, rolling his eyes and swirling the straw of his shake. He heard his boyfriend cry out in dismay at the same time a cry of "exactly!" escaped Lance.
"I'm going to break up with you, Keith Kogane," Hunk deadpanned, retracting his arm from Keith's shoulder and crossing them. Keith pouted at the loss of touch, but he was a stubborn man, okay? He crossed his arms back, raising an eyebrow at his boyfriend. The two had a mini stare down, but Keith groaned internally when he remembered just how stubborn his boyfriend got when it came to topics he was passionate about.
They certainly didn't have that competitive playful-bickering "rivalry" as Keith had with Lance, but Hunk, despite his kind exterior and voice of reason, could be the most petty and stubborn man alive when arguing for something he strongly believed in. Keith couldn't even count the number of times he's been on the other end of a Hunk "I told you so!" speech.
"Breaking up with me 'cause you can't handle the truth?" Keith teased, a smirk on his face. There was a pause, and Keith could see Hunk falter a bit.
"Well, I mean...not actually breaking up with you..." he said kinda sheepishly, his frown dropping. "'cause that'd be silly and y'know I'm really in love with you and wouldn't break up with you for something like that-" Keith fought the endeared smile that threatened to break. He adored his boyfriend's nervous ramblings. "-BUT I take my cooking very seriously and I’m offended," Hunk grumbled, his face back to a pout.
"Hate to agree with Mullet-"
"Not a mullet."
"-but his answer’s right." Lance said matter-of-factly. "I think I'd die if I couldn't kiss Allura for even a day."
"Aww!" Allura said. At the same time, Hunk grumbled a "Maybe you should die then." A loud gasp escaped Lance, his hand jumping to his heart.
"Wow. I seriously cannot believe this. Betrayed! By my childhood best friend and my girlfriend! I've been stabbed in the back...left to bleed out at the parking lot of a 7/11...the only person left to save me is a mulleted knight in shining armor but I don't wanna be saved by someone who dresses like...like that!" Lance cried. From the corner of his eye, Keith could see Lance pointing at his obnoxiously red shirt he bought on clearance. Keith felt like he should be offended. He honestly didn't care. He liked his shirt.
He reached out for a fry, not breaking eye contact with his boyfriend and ignoring Lance's comments.
"Well, if I may provide some insight-"
"Allura, please don't tell me you're humoring this," Keith said in exasperation, finally breaking eye contact with his boyfriend to give her a questioning look. He immediately regretted it.
"Oh man," Hunk pumped the air excitedly, a bright smile on his face. "This is the first time I won a stare down against Keith, high five bud!" Hunk held his palm out to Lance. The other gave a simple "hmph!" and turned away, nose stuck up and face in a pout. "Oh, right. Left you bleeding at the 7/11 parking lot. Sorry, dude."
"Apology not accepted," Lance said, turning to the other and throwing a fry at Hunk.
"Ok, we are not starting another food fight," Keith broke in, grabbing the fry Lance threw and throwing it right back. Lance screeched at the deadly high-speed fry aimed for his head, ducking down quickly.
"Well, why do you think no sauce, Keith?" Allura changed the subject, probably not wanting to repeat the...incident...that happened in their nice studio apartment. She ignored Lance, who was now clinging to her arm and crying complaints of "they're so mean 'llura please can we just leave I hate them."
Keith paused for a moment. The answer just seemed obvious to him. He didn't want to go a day without kissing Hunk.
Sure, there were other ways he could show affection, but he just...loved the way Hunk kissed him. Loved how soft his lips were and how Hunk would hold him gently as they kissed. Loved how he could kiss him whenever - during sweet tender moments as well as filthier desperate ones. Loved leaving kisses all over his beautiful body, worshipping every inch of him, hearing the little noises Hunk would let out whenever he kissed over a particularly sensitive area. Loved the absolute simplicity of the action that still held so much meaning to it, could convey "I love you" and "you're beautiful" and "you mean everything to me" whenever Keith found it hard to verbalize, whenever he found it hard to say every thought in his mind. Keith was, after all, not the best at speaking. He was always an actions over words type of person.
Yet Hunk understood him, loved him unconditionally even when Keith felt as though he wasn't doing enough.
"I just like kissing Hunk," Keith said instead, shrugging before taking a bite of his fry. He didn't turn to his boyfriend but knew his face was probably red.
"That's so cute!" Hunk cried suddenly, grabbing his boyfriend and squeezing him into a tight bear hug. Keith squeaked.
"Oh, alright, anddd we're hugging," Keith said, a soft smile on his face. Allura and Lance giggled at the show.
"See! Keith’s a smart man! His reason is the same as mine!" Lance smiled, before pausing. "I mean, as in I like kissing Allura." He paused again, thinking hard. "Well now that I think about it, I do like kissing Hunk though!"
"Aww, dude!"
"C'mere, man!" Hunk leaned in, and Lance grabbed his face and placed an obnoxious "mwah!" on his cheek before sitting down. Keith sent a fake scowl his way, one that Lance smirked at.
"Why, you want a kiss too, Keithy?" Lance teased.
"Sure, the mullet’s contagious, though."
"You wound me, Keith Kogane," Lance said with a grimace. "Anyways, I'm just a very affectionate person! I love physical touch! I love giving little kisses to my friends! And, like I said, I'd die if I went a day without kissing Allura."
"I understand your point, love, but there are other alternatives to showing affection," Allura piped in. "I don't think I could be stuck with unsatisfactory meals for the rest of my life. And I do like sauce. My father makes quite a good Béarnaise sauce that pairs very well with filet mignon!"
"Also, you two have been eating your fries with ketchup this entire time," Hunk added with a deadpan, pointing an accusatory fry between the two. Keith and Lance froze, stopping mid-chew, before continuing again, guilty expressions on their faces.
"Well, if anyone wanted to hear my opinion," Hunk began, though he was back to his usual lighthearted tone. “Sauces are really cool! They have such a long history and a ton of cultural significance!”
Hunk took two fries, moving them around like dolls.
“Like there were dudes like Marie-Antoine Carême-” Hunk waved one fry. “-and obviously Georges Auguste Escoffier-” He waved the other. “-and don’t get me wrong, they were great for streamlining sauces in France! Like, Escoffier’s five ‘mother sauces’ was pretty much held as gospel in culinary schools ‘til food scholars realized it was pretty Eurocentric and didn't consider other practices from different cultures.”
Hunk took a bite of a fry. RIP Georges Auguste Escoffie. “So now these sauces are seen more as sort of a toolbox for techniques! It’s actually really cool if you think about it…people of so many different cultures and backgrounds speak this sauce language yet make it unique to them! Man, I love human innovation and unity, and-”
Keith couldn’t help but stare at his boyfriend as the other continued on with his nerdy ramble.
Wow.
He really loved this man.
He loved all his niche and nerdy interests, loved how passionate he was, loved how genuinely smart he was.
Keith wouldn’t be surprised if there were little hearts floating around his head right now. He’d listen to Hunk ramble about the history of sauce for forever if he could.
"Yeah, I agree with Hunk," he said suddenly. "Sorry for cutting you off. I change my mind, though. No kisses."
“Really?” Hunk asked with shining eyes and a bright smile. How could Keith say no to that?
Keith gave a thumbs up, because of course he did.
Somehow Hunk’s smile grew even brighter as he squeezed Keith again into a tight hug. Keith couldn’t help the fond smile that broke out on his face.
That was until he felt a fry hit him. He turned and glared daggers at Lance. The other man was already doing the same.
"Dude.” Lance was shaking his head. “You are weak. Weak. When Shiro and Pidge get here, I’m asking them. They’ll definitely side with me.”
(They, in fact, did not. Shiro thought about it, perhaps a bit too long, weighing out the options and mumbling to himself the pros and cons for each, eventually settling on “This is really tough…maybe no sauce? Actually, no….”
Pidge just blinked at Lance and shook her head.)