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Barda kept silent watch as his companions slept across from him.
Jasmine was curled around Filli in her sleep, her breaths deep and even. Kree was beside her, his head tucked beneath his wing. With no trees near for him to perch on, he had to resort to sleeping on the ground.
Lief lay curled beneath his bedroll, one hand clenched tight around the Belt he wore even now.
They were too young for this. Even in the depths of sleep, the lines that this journey had worn into their faces stayed, making them look older than their years.
Children, though the world had long since stopped treating them as such. Lief was barely sixteen, and Jasmine no older. Her years alone in the Forests had aged her beyond her time, and this quest had only worsened it.
Barda’s heart ached.
He hadn't wanted Lief to come on this journey.
No child should have to walk such a path, to be forced into such choices, into fear, hunger, and pain. He had wanted Lief safe at home, with his parents, with the forge. He had argued with Jarred and Anna long before this quest began, ever since learning of their plan to send their sixteen year old son into the most dangerous places in Deltora. This quest was no place for a child, and yet a child bore its burden.
As Barda looked at his companions, he forced himself to truly see what he had tried, even briefly, to ignore.
Jasmine lay curled and defensive even in sleep, so shaped by vigilance from the Forests of Silence and every ambush since, that she could never fully relax.
Lief twitched beneath his bedroll, his face drawn tight with fear and pain.
This quest, and the gems he bore, were wearing him down. With every gem added to the Belt, the weight upon him grew heavier. And it had only grown more so since they had retrieved the opal from the ruins of the City of the Rats.
It had shown him the future, and he had not come away unchanged.
Barda’s fear and worry for this boy he had guarded for so long had only grown worse since they had left the Shifting Sands.
In that dreadful place, the distance between them and Lief, bearer of the gems, had become undeniable. Lief had heard, had felt something in those sands that neither Barda nor Jasmine could perceive. It had seized the boy and drawn him somewhere they could not follow. Lief had not seen or heard them, no matter how they called to him.
It had shaken Barda to his core. He had never imagined there would come a place where Lief would walk, and he could not.
Barda had followed after and protected Lief from afar for years. He had saved the boy from his own recklessness and Grey Guards alike. When this quest began, Barda had never thought that he would truly be unable to protect Lief, despite what he had told him at the forge.
Neither of them were children any longer, though perhaps Jasmine had not been a child for years. Not since the day her parents were taken from her. This quest had stripped away what little innocence Lief had left.
Barda ached for the reckless, laughing boy he had watched over for six years, the boy who had once grinned at danger as if it were a game. He had seen that boy fade, and he mourned him still.
But the man that Lief was becoming was one Barda would be proud to follow, even if it meant one day following where he could not lead.
Barda rested a hand on Lief’s shoulder, offering him what little comfort he could.Lief's breathing steadied beneath his hand, the tension softening but not gone.
Barda pulled his cloak tighter around his shoulders and turned his gaze back out to the world beyond their little band.
He could not halt the slow grinding-down of their spirits. The enemy would see to that. But he could watch over them while he still had strength to do so.
He could not shield them from what this quest would demand. But while they slept, he would stand between them and the dark.