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WAGs and Proud 🏳️🌈
Shane: I just overheard our rookies debating who’s the bigger bottom, me or Luca.
Kyle: 🤣
Kip: That’s hilarious, but why are you telling us?
Harris: I’m not sure it’s appropriate for me to be part of this conversation…
Kip: That’s never stopped you before.
Harris: True.
Kyle: Eric just asked me why I’m laughing.
Shane: DONT TELL HIM
Ilya: Shane does not want other players to know because they will use it for chirping.
Shane: Sorry I don’t want guys making comments about my asshole during games?
Kyle: Eric’s retired
Kip: You say that like he wouldn’t immediately tell Scott.
Kyle: ok fair
Harris: @Archie should really be here for this.
Kip: I’m kind of surprised you care about this so much, Shane.
Shane: What!? I don’t care.
Kyle: uh-huh
Harris: Sure you don’t.
Ilya: Shane, it is okay you want to defend your place as Olympic Champion of bottoms.
Ilya: 🥇🍑
Shane: It was just weird hearing them talk about it.
Kyle: For the record, I also think it’s Shane.
Kip: No way. It’s definitely Luca.
Harris: Yeah, I’m gonna say Luca.
Ilya: @Fabian
Kip: You just think he’s gonna vote for Shane.
Ilya: Yes.
Ilya: Fabian is very wise.
Archie: wtf?
Ilya: Finally!
Archie: I just finished a shoot. Some of us have jobs.
Archie: I can’t believe you’re actually talking about this.
Shane: You can’t?
Archie: In my defense, I just got here.
Fabian: ok, I’m caught up.
Ilya: Fabian! Good you are here.
Ilya: It’s Shane, yes?
Fabian: No.
Kip: Told you.
Fabian: It’s not Luca either. You can’t compare them.
Fabian: Shane’s obviously a power bottom. There’s a lot of overlap, but it’s ultimately a different skill set.
Ilya: See? He is wise.
Shane: 💪🍑
Archie: Luca is DEFINITELY not a power bottom lol
Archie: he’s just slutty
Fabian: Also, why are your rookies debating which of their teammates likes to get fucked up the ass more?
Kip: ^^
Ilya: Shane is slutty.
Shane: I regret everything.
Harris: What are you doing? You guys need to be on the ice in like five minutes.
Kyle: lol
Archie: 💀
Ilya: Who is a bigger bottom, Luca or Shane?
Troy: wtf, roz? I’m not answering that.
Ilya: boring
Ilya: Bennett! Who is a bigger bottom, Luca or Shane?
Eric: How would I know?
Ilya: Hunter. I have very important question.
Scott: What’s up?
Ilya: Who is a bigger bottom, Luca or Shane?
Scott: Fuck off.
Scott: Hey kid, I just want you to know that if someone ever makes you uncomfortable you can talk to me about it. Or Kip.
Scott: Even if it’s someone who’s in a position of power. We wouldn’t side with someone just because we’ve known them longer.
Scott: We believe victims.
Luca: Thank you, Hunter. This is very kind of you.
Scott: I know you really look up to Rozanov, but he shouldn’t take advantage of that.
Luca: He is not.
Luca: Ilya would never do that.
Scott: He’s never pressured you into sexual situations?
Luca: Hunter thinks Ilya is being inappropriate with me.
Shane: Inappropriate how?
Luca: Taking advantage. Pressuring me for sex.
Shane: Are you sure he was talking about Ilya?
Luca: Yes. He used Ilya’s name.
Shane: What the fuck?
Luca: Hunter said I should talk to him if someone is making me uncomfortable.
Luca: I think he is trying to be supportive, but he is the one making me uncomfortable.
Shane: What did you say to Luca?
Scott: Shane, I’m not sure you’re the appropriate person for me to talk to about this.
Shane: You’re accusing my husband of sexual misconduct with one of our teammates.
Shane: If this was coming from almost anyone else, I’d assume they were just being homophobic.
Scott: I just want the kid to know he can come to us.
Scott: I get that Rozanov doesn’t really have a filter, but there are some lines that shouldn’t be crossed.
Shane: What did Ilya say?
Shane: WHAT HAPPENED TO THE WAG CHAT BEING SACRED!
Ilya: I was defending your honor!
WAGs and Proud 🏳️🌈
Kyle: There’s really only one way to answer this question.
Kyle: You guys need to have a foursome.
Ilya: LUCA IS A CHILD
Shane: No.
Ilya: Also no.
Harris: Never gonna happen. They’re scary possessive.
Kip: Why does it matter? It’s not like Shane’s going to be bottoming for anyone except Ilya.
Archie: um…
Kip: I’m not saying Luca would cheat!
Kip: Just that Ilya would literally kill anyone who tried to get their dick anywhere near Shane.
Ilya: This is true.
Shane: 😏
Harris: I think it’s best for everyone if we stop talking about this.
Archie: agreed
Kip: The important thing is having good consensual sex.
Kyle: Fuck responsibly everyone.
The Secret Society of Stick Handlers
Shane: I’m sorry for any inappropriate questions you may have received from Ilya earlier today. Please disregard them.
Ilya: You started it.
A few days later…
“What about this one?” Shane held up a prostate massager and showed it to Luca.
“I’m not sure.”
“Have you ever tried one of these before?”
“No. I only have a dildo and a plug, but they are not very big.”
“That’s more than I had at your age. Though I was a lot more repressed.” As though to prove that was no longer the case, Shane picked up a toy that the store had labeled ‘NOT FOR BEGINNERS.’ Luca was by no means a beginner, but even he found the toy intimidating.
“Have you ever topped?” Luca asked, suddenly curious.
“Um… Kind of.” Luca looked over at him, confused. “I mean, I’ve had sex with girls where I, um… penetrated them.” It was strange seeing Shane go from casually handing Luca a sex toy to physically recoiling while talking about having sex with a woman. Though Luca could definitely relate to the second part. “But, uh, not with a guy. Um… have you?”
Luca nodded. “Twice. With my ex. I did not like it.”
“Yeah, me neither. I mean, obviously I didn’t like it because I don’t like women, but it also kind of felt like there was something… missing, I guess.”
“Yes.”
“And Ilya doesn’t bottom.” He quickly picked up another toy and began inspecting it. Maybe he was not as comfortable as Luca thought. It was always hard to tell with Shane. The only person who ever seemed to be able to get a read on him was Ilya.
“Is it okay that I feel sorry for him?”
Shane laughed. “I’m telling him you said that.” He dropped the intimidating toy in his basket and put the other one he was looking at back on the shelf. “I’m gonna go pick up some flavored lube. We ran out of Ilya’s favorite kind and it’s been too long since I’ve been eaten out.”
Luca nodded sympathetically, still stunned that he was having this conversation at all.
“I have never heard you say so much about sex before. Usually you get very embarrassed."
Shane shrugged. “I guess it’s different ‘cause I know you get it. I’ve never really had people to talk to about this stuff. I mean, Ilya’s bi and all of our friends are verse. It’s kind of hard to explain why you don’t like something to someone who does.”
“Like if someone says to Ilya ‘I don’t like shchi’ he cannot understand because it tastes good to him.”
“Exactly.”
Shane walked off towards the lube section and Luca turned back to the toy display. Maybe he should tell Young about these. He’d been asking questions about sex toys since getting pegged, but Luca didn’t know that much about it.
He probably should’ve just told Young to ask Shane.
Luca: Which one do you think I should get?
Luca: [picture of two prostate massagers and a vibrating plug]
Archie: fuck baby
Luca: Yes, that is what they are for.
Archie: 😂
Archie: get the first massager it looks more partner friendly 😉
Luca: 🥰
Archie: you def need a vibrating plug
Archie: I’ve seen ones that connect to an app so someone else can control it even from far away
Archie: I’ll order you one
Luca: 😳
Archie: not that I’m complaining, but why the sudden shopping spree?
Luca: Shane and I are bonding.
Luca: Should I get flavored lube? Shane says Ilya likes it for rimming.
Archie: see if they have this kind
Archie: [link]
Luca put back the two toys he wasn’t going to buy.
“Excuse me,” Luca said to a nearby employee, they had a pin on their shirt with ‘Cinder, they/them’ and a braided pink mohawk. Luca clicked the link Archie sent him and turned his phone around. “Do you sell this?”
“We sure do! I don’t know if we have that exact flavor but I can go check.”
“Oh, you don’t have to do that.”
Cinder gave him an indulgent smile. “That’s very sweet, but it’s literally my job. I’ll be right back, okay?”
“Yes. Thank you.”
Shane came back with two bottles of lube and gestured for Luca to follow him to a display of dildos.
“Have you ever used something like this?” Shane held up the box with the dildo. It looked pretty normal to Luca. It was blue and had a suction cup on the bottom. He shook his head. “The suction cup can be really helpful for skype sex. It’s easy for your arm to block your partner’s view if you’re trying to hold it.”
Luca nodded and opened his notes app. He really should’ve been writing more of this down.
“Oh!” Shane said, noticing the item in Luca’s basket, “You picked something.”
Despite himself, Luca blushed. “Yes. I was deciding between three so I asked Archie.”
“And he was helpful?” Luca nodded. “That’s good. I can’t really ask Ilya for his opinion because he’ll just tell me to buy the whole store.”
It was easy to imagine Ilya walking into the store and announcing he wanted to buy one of everything. He would probably donate anything they couldn’t use to charity. Could you even donate sex toys to charity?
“Archie seems like a really great guy.”
Luca could feel himself blushing. That seemed to happen anytime he talked about Archie, or heard about Archie, or even just thought about Archie, which he did a lot. He smiled. “I like him very much.”
He decided to take Shane’s advice and looked at a few different dildos that had suction cups. There was a very large one that sparked his interest, but it was the kind of thing that was only really brought out for special occasions. He didn’t like the idea of regularly using a toy that was bigger than his boyfriend.
The store had a very good range of options and he eventually settled on one that had a nice shape. It was about the same length as Archie, but not as thick.
“Hey, um. I’m sorry about the whole ‘who’s the bigger bottom’ thing.”
“You are very competitive.”
Shane looked down guiltily.
“It’s okay, Shane. We are different. And there is no competition. You are only with Ilya and I do not want to sleep with your husband.”
Shane raised his eyebrow, “Really?”
“Of course not.”
“So if Archie and I both said it was okay and Ilya was up for it, you’re saying you wouldn’t have sex with him?”
Luca thought about it for a second. He’d be lying if he said he was no longer attracted to Ilya, but after getting to know them the idea of Ilya without Shane was just unsettling.
“Only if you are there.”
Shane’s eyebrows shot up. Clearly that wasn’t the answer he was expecting.
Just then Cinder came back with a large bottle of lube.
“So we do have the flavor you’re looking for, but only in a larger size bottle.”
“That is okay. Thank you for your help, Cinder.”
“No problem. Let me know if you need anything else.”
Suddenly, Luca had an idea.
“I have another question.” He gestured back at the display of prostate massagers. “Which of these is best for beginner straight men?”
Cinder raised their eyebrows and looked awkwardly at Shane.
“It is not for me! My friend got pegged for the first time and has been asking me many questions.”
Cinder chuckled, “Man, I’ve been there.”
Luca: Cinder recommends this for you.
Luca: [picture of a very basic prostate massager in black]
Young: whos cinder?
Luca: They are employed at the sex shop.
Young: HAASY
Young: are you sex toy shopping for me?
Young: cuz I appreciate the help, but that’s a little weird
Luca: No, I am shopping for me, but you have been asking for advice.
Luca: I asked Cinder what is best for beginner straight man because I am not a beginner or straight.
Young: oh ok
Young: thanks man. thats really nice
“Was there anything else you wanted to look at?” Shane asked.
Luca hesitated before nodding. Not quite able to say it out loud, he just started walking over to the BDSM section of the store. Shane came up next to him and smiled knowingly.
The display was very overwhelming. It was a little unsettling how many things Luca couldn’t identify.
Luca: ?
Luca: [picture of high quality padded black leather cuffs]
Archie: 👀👀🥵
Archie: baby you’re killing me
Luca: So, yes?
Archie: fuck yes
Archie: I need to get a cock ring so I can tie you up and fuck you for hours
Luca: 😳
Luca: ok
Next to Luca there was the sound of a phone camera taking a picture. He panicked for a split second before he realized it was just Shane.
“You’re blushing so hard! I have to send this to Archie.”
Luca looked at the picture of himself on Shane’s phone screen. There he was, looking down at his own phone and smiling, face almost as red as his jersey.
They did a little more browsing, and Luca tried very hard not to notice what Shane was putting in his basket. He and his teammates knew too much about Shane and Ilya’s sex life already.
Shane did not take the same attitude towards Luca. He watched as Luca laid his purchases out on the counter at the cash register, nodding approvingly as each item was rung up.
“This was very nice. Thank you for inviting me, Shane,” Luca said once they were in Shane’s car.
“Yeah, I had a good time.” Shane gave him a big smile and then pulled out of the parking lot. “Do you want to get lunch?” For some reason Shane got suddenly tense. “Or not! I get it if you don’t want to keep hanging out. I can just take you back to your place.”
“Lunch sounds good,” Luca replied. He could see Shane relax instantly.
They decided on a place to eat and spent the drive there in silence. It was really nice to be able to just sit in silence, Luca reflected. The guys were great, but most of them were bad at being quiet like this.
The restaurant was familiar. One of the places they went so often neither of them even needed to look at the menu.
Partway through their meal Luca looked across the table and said, “I think I’m okay if you are the bigger bottom.”
Shane choked around his sip of water. Coughing, Shane managed to say, “What?”
“Fabian is right, we are different. But if you would like to be the official biggest bottom I do not mind.”
“Well it doesn’t count if you just give it to me!”
They both froze, staring at each other, and Luca could see Shane replaying his words in his head. A second later he looked away, fixing his eyes on his plate, bright red from his hairline, down his neck, and all the way to the tips of his ears.
“Did you hear about New Jersey’s goalie?”
It was a relief to spend the rest of their lunch talking about hockey. Luca was very happy to no longer be thinking about his asshole in public.