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The slight creaking of the wooden stairs in the cabin was the first thing that alerted Charlie. The second was the lightness he felt on his side of the mattress.
The trip to a coastal town was the school's idea to get students interested in hiking and local history, but everyone knew that the only thing on those teenagers' minds was diving headfirst into any sea or pool, eating junk food every hour, and being able to sleep away from home in small beach cabins that the school had rented. It was the end of the last of the three days, and the boys were all sleeping in the same cottage after hours of insistence, several mattresses scattered on the floor, making every step through the room sink.
Charlie was sleeping peacefully after a tiring day of hiking in the sun that burned his face and ears, not to mention the mosquito bites that wouldn't stop itching. In his sleep, he had found refuge from the irritation, but when he heard the creaking of the old wood of the stairs, he woke up. He looked to his side and realized that the body that had been lying there was no longer there. Linus.
Concerned about Linus' departure, Charlie got up and tiptoed toward the stairs, trying to discern in the dim moonlight coming through the window where to step so as not to step on his friends. He took advantage of the fact that his shoes were at the door of the cramped cabin and put them on before going out into the night.
The path through the cluster of cabins was paved with stone, so Linus's footsteps were easy to follow. Charlie had to be careful not to trip on the poorly lit trail as he followed a narrow path between the cabins and entered the trees.
Charlie thought about turning back, thinking it might be a hallucination or a ghost or perhaps the effect of so many mosquito bites, but then he saw a bridge over a small stream, and just ahead, the slender figure of Linus, wild black hair and baggy pajamas on his shoulders, walking along the sandy beach where this shortcut led.
Charlie dragged his shoes like lead weights through the sand and saw Linus sitting close to where the waves reached on their way out. His hair shone against the solemn moon, his eyes resting on the waves. Charlie held back the fluttering in his chest that his heart had been doing for months whenever Linus did anything. He approached slowly, thought about calling his name, but just sat down next to him.
“Did I wake you up?” Linus asked. His voice still carried that scratchiness of someone who had just woken up.
“I heard you leave. I was worried,” Charlie murmured. Linus laughed, as if worrying about his best friend was a silly reason.
“I just came here to get some air, Charlie Brown. The room was too stuffy. There was no reason for you to follow me.”
“But I have every right to be paranoid.”
“That's because you always are!” Linus laughed, and Charlie playfully elbowed him. For a few seconds, silence fell between them, only the ocean roaring in its indigo ebb and flow. An ebb and flow, for the sea was a cycle, not a moment. A moment like this, which only goes away until the mind paints over it as another memory. Charlie looked down at the sand.
“What are you going to do after this?” Charlie Brown asked. "School, I mean"
“... What a random question, Charlie Brown!” Linus laughed at the unusual question, but Charlie continued with his melancholic expression. “I'm going to be a teacher, and I want to be the wisest of them all. I want to be able to think for the rest of my life and help others find meaning in their own. But you already know that, so why...”
“I... I don't know what to do about the future, Linus.” He sighed, shoulders slumped, back hunched, and knees tucked into his chest. "We're two years away from the end. The end of school life, of lunches together, of working at each other's houses... and I don't know what to do. What am I going to do after all this is over? I'm going to graduate, and I'll have to accept that I'll never see you all every day. You're all going to college, and me? My future is hopeless! I have no idea what to do, I have no idea how to grow up, Linus!“ He ran his hands through his hair. ”And how am I going to make new friends? I'm the most socially awkward person in this neighborhood, and I even lose to my dog! Oh Linus, I'm going to go crazy before I even graduate..."
Linus looked at Charlie Brown intently for a long time, and Charlie even felt his cheeks flush from the intensity of his gaze, as if he were measuring every inch of his face. Then Linus got up and brushed the sand off his pants.
“Come,” he said, and led Charlie to where the wet, cold sand met the night waves. Even with his pant legs rolled up, Charlie managed to get his pajamas wet.
“The future, Charlie Brown,” Linus began, drawing the whole world's attention to him with his calm, wise voice. "It's uncertain, no matter how much we plan. There's no point in trying to memorize the waves of the sea if we have no control over their direction or the force with which they hit us. The future is our sea, Charlie Brown. Uncertain, blue,rocking boats. But there's no way to sail if you're afraid of the waves, sometimes you just have to hold on," and Charlie felt a light touch against his hand, and felt Linus's hand sliding and intertwining with his. Charlie looked at Linus, whose gentle eyes were illuminated by the faint orange that was beginning to appear in the sky.
“But what if my boat is leaking? What if I don't have the strength to row against the waves? What if a tsunami catches me? What if...” Charlie began, the mosquito bites more noticeable now that anxiety was setting in, as he looked down at his feet. Linus lifted his face, the sunlight rising from the water illuminating Charlie Brown's anxious, golden face.
"Charlie... if your boat sinks, I'll always be here. To offer you a rescue buoy or pull your leg out of a shark's mouth.“ They both laughed at the silly assumption. ”But I'll always be by your side. And I trust your boat, because it's a good sailor."
“...Thank you, Linus... really. For everything.” Charlie flashed a slight smile that lit up the dimmest soul.
“Always here for you, Charlie. Just promise you'll send me Christmas cards.” Linus laughed, and Charlie nodded blindly, because he knew that if he said what he was thinking, about how he didn't just want him for Christmas, but for his whole life, by his side, as his best friend and everything else, it would scare his friend away to the end of the horizon. The sun rose slowly over the sea, its ethereal glow sparkling against the waves. Charlie wanted to keep that moment forever. But it would go away with the sea, as it always did. But he wanted it to last a little longer. Just a little longer.
“The sun is beautiful, isn't it?” He tried to fill the silence. Linus filled his lungs.
“I love you, Charlie Brown.”
Charlie felt like he was going to break. Anything that crossed his mind turned into nervous stuttering. Good Grief…
"I wanted to say that. I think it's appropriate for the moment. You always said you liked sunrises, so...“ Linus avoided looking at Charlie's face, but he could see the red in his cheeks. ”You don't have to say anything in return. You don't even have to accept it. I just wanted you to know how much I don't want you to become just a Christmas card, even though I love receiving them. I may love cards, but I love you more than any piece of paper."
He sighed toward the sea and then looked at Charlie, finally. His face was lit by the rising sun, the glow matching his face perfectly. His eyes sparkled with enchantment, love, that sparkle that only that pair of eyes had embedded in their DNA. Charlie wrapped his arms around Linus in a tight hug. Linus took a moment to respond, confused, but Charlie whispered in his ear.
“You have no idea how afraid I was that I was the only one who felt this way.”
And that was enough for both of them.
Linus broke the embrace and bowed his head, pressing his lips to Charlie's in a shy kiss that spoke louder than any poem, the sea around them watching love finally blossom where it had already been planted.
Perhaps life is a sea, an infinite and unpredictable turmoil that knocks us down and drowns us against the current so many times. But sometimes, in the middle of the sea, we will have a boat and a sun to call our own.