Chapter Text
Emma hasn’t been in the PTMC for long, only about 4 months in and she can already say that the stereotype is there for a reason.
Surgeons are, well, peculiar to say the least.
Calling them mean wouldn’t be entirely accurate as most were professional, if not cold and clinical, without any real snappiness unless the situation was critical enough.
However, they aren’t exactly pleasant to be around most of the time, not like practically everyone from the ER, be it nurses or doctors.
Emma usually feels two inches tall when she’s working directly with them, because although she knows what she’s supposed to do most of the time, she hasn’t yet gained her footing and found the confidence to effortlessly work alongside them.
One surgeon in particular, though, stands out even more.
Dr. Park or as he’s more commonly known, Shark.
Emma had been confused by the nickname—she had heard it before she met him about a week into her career at PTMC—until she was introduced to him when it finally clicked.
Well, it’d be a lie to say she was introduced to him, more like nearly knocked him over when she opened the curtains around one of the beds, lodging her elbow right into his stomach with a full swing.
Thankfully, he gave her far more grace than she’d expect based on his reputation—only glaring at her before quickly stalking off—leaving Emma to wallow in her embarrassment.
But regardless, she understood why he earned himself the nickname after such a predator.
Not only does he apparently behave like it—Emma hasn’t worked with him enough to really confirm neither deny but she could believe it from what little she’s seen—he also somehow looks exactly like a shark would in a human form.
Emma has discussed it with Joy once, on their weekly hang out, what feature of his makes him look like the animal, nonetheless they couldn’t point out one specific thing.
Perhaps it’s the angle of his jaw, or the deep set of cold eyes, possibly even his sharp nose, or maybe it’s just all of it combined together with his attitude, she isn’t sure.
So it might be a little embarrassing to say but Emma finds Dr. Park quite fascinating.
He is the most private person in the entire hospital as far as she knows, the only real detail that is really known about him being his name.
That’s not necessarily unusual, plenty of doctors like to keep their private and professional life separate, still, this level of secrecy feels strange.
And Emma is a curious woman to say the least.
So if she starts trying to somehow get to learn more, no one has to know.
The chances to really even get to be in the the same room as him are few and far between, especially as a new RN, however that doesn’t deter her.
Dana hasn’t been calling her the sunshine of the PTMC for the past few months for no reason after all.
Her first real chance to have a conversation with him happens about a week after she decides to—she actually isn’t sure what she’s decided to do, just that she’s taken an interest in this strange guy no one seems to know and wants to be the one to break inside his walls.
Emma is quite preoccupied by handing Dr. Whitaker all the tools he’s naming as he examines a patient with an exposed leg fracture, amongst many other injuries, when suddenly the door opens and in walks Dr. Shark, eyes not meeting anyone’s around the room, just the injured patient as if he truly were a shark circling around its prey.
“Dr. Park,” murmurs Dr. Al-Hashimi, awkward smile on her face, “thank you for coming down.”
Shark only hums, eyes still not raising from the horrifying sight as he tugs on the blue medical gloves, “how much on the irrigating so far?”
“Just about a liter, she hasn’t been here for long,” Dr. Whitaker informs the surgeon as he keeps on squeezing the bottle of saline, “we’ve given her IV antibiotics and a tetanus shot.”
Emma notices how quiet the hospital suddenly seems, Park’s arrival bringing everyone’s attention to his presence.
Dr. Park moves closer to Dr. Whitaker to take a closer look at the exposed bone, long finger tracing the broken skin alongside it.
Emma stops listening when Garcia starts discussing some possible complications from other injuries, instead taking the moment to observe Dr. Park while he’s not paying attention.
Not that he’d look at her even if he were to make eye contact with someone, though she wouldn’t mind it one bit.
He’s taller than everyone else in the room, even than Dr. Robby, who’s usually the tallest one in the room, or at least it seems like it.
His arms are also, well simply put, huge, muscles bulging in the scrub top that isn’t originally meant to be as tight as it is on him.
Emma wonders if he works out in his free time.
And honestly, even if he weren’t bigger and taller than everyone in the room, his energy would make it seem like he is.
Emma is definitely staring.
“Alright, I’ll book the OR, place betadine soaked dressing on it after another liter and stabilise it for god’s sake,” Shark finishes, throwing the used gloves away, gaze finally lifting from the patient.
For a brief moment she thinks he will leave the room without even looking at a single person standing inside, however she’s wrong.
Because the next thing she knows, his dark grey eyes meet Emma’s warm brown ones.
Emma is pretty sure she chokes on her spit when his gaze meets hers, startling her out of her shameless staring.
It probably only takes a few quick seconds before his eyes are gone from her face again, like they were never there to begin with, however it somehow feels endless.
Shark doesn’t say anything else, doesn’t as much as nod before he’s gone just as abruptly as he appeared, leaving everyone in relative silence, as much silence as you can get in an ER.
“That was weirder than usual.”
Emma has never been more grateful for Dana than in that moment when she calls her name from the other side of the hub.
Their conversation will have to wait for another time then.
And her next chance to possibly get to talk to him—Emma has figured it might be harder than she has originally thought—comes surprisingly soon, only a week after her first attempt.
Emma has seen him around the ER, a couple of times actually, however he doesn’t visit nearly as much as all the other surgeons.
So when she raises her head one afternoon and sees him making his way through the ER in her general direction, Emma panics a little bit.
His walk, similarly to everything else about him, is steady and controlled, almost as if he were a real shark swimming through water, the gentle sway of the tail guiding him through the huge mass of liquid around him with fascinating elegance.
Emma quickly glances down at the stack of papers placed in front of her, trying to get back to filling out the form but to no avail. Dr. Park’s presence is just far too distracting.
“Who the hell is the primary on the severed fingers?” Shark’s voice is not loud, however it attracts the eyes of multiple people around, authority lacing the short sentence.
Dana, who he directs the question at, looks up from her computer screen, eyes peeking over the top of her glasses, “Dr. Park, hello.”
Emma has admired how fearless Dana is from the very beginning, unafraid to speak up whenever she needs to.
“I can look that up for you,” Dana continues when he just stares at her, fingers quickly typing something into her computer.
But before she has the chance to find the information Dr. Park is looking for, Emma clears her throat and turns towards the duo like she hasn’t been watching the whole exchange, “it’s Dr. Langdon, sir.”
Emma regrets speaking out the moment the words leave her mouth, realising he’ll turn his whole attention to her and pierce her with his eyes but it’s too late to take them back.
Calling him ‘sir’ also seems slightly strange looking back, although it was the polite thing to do.
“I was there with him,” Emma adds, voice growing weaker the longer he stares at her without blinking, “he should be in South 19.”
Dana’s gaze is moving between them, for once speechless, leaving the two of them to continue the conversation.
Shark doesn’t answer right away, instead continues his staring, gaze still cold, although there’s something in his look she can’t quite pinpoint.
When even Dana starts looking like she might intervene, he suddenly turns, the first slightly imprecise move she’s seen him make, looking ready to bolt when he pauses again, only halfway turning his head back to her.
“Thanks.”
And before either of them can blink, he’s gone.
“I thought I’ve seen everything after working here for 3 decades but I was clearly wrong,” Dana mumbles, shaking her head before she starts typing again, the moment seemingly forgotten just like last time.
Or so Emma thought.
Joy—who somehow just notices everything—is of course aware of Emma’s previous questions about Dr. Park so when she hears about the two moments, if it can be called that, between them she immediately seeks Emma out.
It’s been a couple of hours since Dr. Park stormed into the ER and while Emma might be busy, she hasn’t quite stopped thinking about it.
It feels childish, to dwell on such an insignificant moment Shark forgot the second it passed, yet it keeps replaying in her mind.
His eyes, dangerous and piercing like the animal’s he’s nicknamed after, staring into her soul.
It would be hard to forget that.
Especially when she found it so exciting being in the centre of his attention but that’s a thing to unpack later.
“So, I heard there is some.. tension, between you and doctor Grumpy.”
Emma’s head raises so quickly she can almost hear her neck snap, eyes immediately finding smug looking Joy leaning against the top of her chair.
“What?” Emma squeaks, looking around to see whether someone is listening to their conversation, “nothing happened?”
“Oh, I wouldn’t call it that from what I’ve heard,” Joy sits down in a free chair next to Emma, rolling as close as the space allows.
Emma frowns, suspiciously checking the people around them again before she leans closer to her friend, “someone said something?”
“Just mentioned some staring. And him saying thank you? Honestly, that seems excessive, does the guy seriously never thank anyone?”
“Nothing happened,” Emma sighs, tugging on her braid absentmindedly, “I only told him about some patient. I don’t want it to seem like something’s going on, if this gets to him, oh god.”
Joy shakes her head, turning on the chair back and forth, “don’t worry about it, it’ll blow over, this place is full of gossip.”
“I guess.”
Emma pauses for a moment, hands going back to keyboard to continue her typing, “who knows?”
“Well, it came from Princess, so right now? Probably everyone,” Emma groans at Joy’s response, earning herself a quiet laugh.
“I didn’t even realise she was listening, how does she hear everything and also gets her work done?”
Joy shrugs, exhaling loudly as she continues her turns on the chair.
“Oh, I didn’t realise doctors had so much time on their hands. I should tell Robby that we’re not as understaffed as he claims.”
Joy closes her eyes as she drops her head in defeat, forcing herself to get up from the chair, “sorry, Dana.”
“These kids,” Dana mumbles to herself when Joy starts walking away, however there’s a fond smile on her face as she shakes her head.
Emma watches her for a moment, only looking away when Dana stops sorting through the papers in her hands.
“What about you, Emma? Working hard?”
“Trying to,” Emma grins, leaning back in her chair to look at the older woman.
“Don’t I know it,” Dana reaches into her pocket, taking out the pack of cigarettes she definitely hasn’t touched in a few months, “wanna come with me outside?”
Dana knows Emma doesn’t smoke however she usually takes her with when going out for a smoke, a tradition from the first day when she needed to take a breather.
But today, the idea of standing there, possibly being questioned about whatever is going on, it does not sound appealing, “oh, I can’t. I have to finish this and then Dr. Mohan asked me to assist with a humerus fracture in North 4.”
Dana seems unconvinced but she doesn’t pry, only nods before leaving her with a weird smile.
Emma doesn’t even feel bad about partially lying.
The shift eventually becomes more hectic as the hours go by, as it usually does, forcing Emma to barely pause enough to breathe, let alone worry about people gossiping.
It does come up a few times, however she gets distracted each time and uses the chaos to her advantage.
And just when Emma starts to think the day might never be over, the night shift finally arrives, Lena’s figure by the nurses’ station almost bringing her to tears.
Joy is already in the changing room by the time Emma walks in, tying her old sneakers.
“I wanna hear all about today, just so you know,” Emma looks up at her from the pile of her outside clothes, “we’re still on for Wednesday, right?”
Once Emma agrees, they just share a quick hug before Joy is gone, leaving Emma to finish changing before she can finally go home.
As she’s sitting down on the bench, her thoughts once again betray her and circle back to the encounter from earlier.
She hasn’t seen Dr. Park smile, isn’t sure if he has ever done so in the hospital, yet she could almost see his canine teeth, sharp enough to cut if you were to poke it.
There’s a wonder in her mind, if it’d draw blood if he were to bite down on her lip, if he’d lick it off—
Alright!
She really needs to go to sleep before she does something stupid.
Emma yawns, hand coming to cover her mouth as she walks out of the locker room, gently rubbing her tired eyes, careful as to not smudge her mascara.
Her shift has ended over three hours ago and even the makeup on her skin has started to feel like an extra weight.
As she’s trying to keep herself awake enough to drive, feet moving in the direction of the garage, not really looking where she’s going, suddenly her body collides with another.
It’s a miracle she doesn’t fall down to the ground with the force of the crash, or maybe less of a miracle and more of the quick reflexes of the other person, whose hand comes to grasp her elbow to steady her.
One of her hands tugs on the bag strap on her shoulder, the other one catching the forearm of her saviour’s arm, squeezing it to make sure she’s gonna stay upright.
“You do that quite a lot, don’t you.”
Emma’s breath hitches, her gaze quickly raising to meet the already familiar eyes.
“Oh, Dr. Park! I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going,” Emma sheepishly smiles up at him, quickly letting go of his arm, fingers instead twisting her already loose braid.
“It’s fine,” Shark pauses, eyes darting around her face, “you going home?”
Emma raises her eyebrows in surprise at his question, not expecting him to keep the conversation going any longer than necessary, “oh! Yeah, my shift just ended. Are you?”
The question feels stupid once she realises that he’s not changed out of his scrubs, clipboard in one of his large hands.
One of those hands was clutching her elbow just moments prior.
Anyway.
“No, no, not yet, a couple more hours at least,” Park nods to himself, looking away from her for the first time since she bumped into him, “I won’t keep you, have the good rest of the day.”
As is typical for him, he swiftly turns and look ready to take off when Emma blurts out, “I’m Emma, by the way. Emma Nolan.”
She is unsure why she said it, it’s not like he’d care to know her name, yet she couldn’t help herself from wanting him to know it.
Everyone here knows her name, it’s written on her badge for god’s sake, and yet it feels far too intimate once she says it to him.
At first it seems like he didn’t even hear her, only indication that he did being the pause on his next step.
And just when Emma thinks he’s going to leave without even acknowledging that she’s said anything, he fully stops and looks at her over his shoulder, “I’m Brendon Park.”
He gives her one last look before he starts walking again, this time not stopping before he turns around the corner and disappears from her sight.
Oh, Emma is in shark infested waters and has no desire to leave.
Dr. Park’s kind response to Emma’s reoccurring clumsiness opens the dam to her attempts to a whole new level.
She’s not as obvious about it which definitely makes it harder than it needs to be, however not only would people notice but also she can’t rush it as she’d come across as some teenager with a crush.
So whenever Shark comes down to the ER, expression as blank as ever, Emma does not call out to him neither does she wave, that’d be both embarrassing and probably make him get a restraining order.
But she does catch his eyes when she can, which seems to be happening a lot more lately, and gives him a smile, tilting her head in greeting.
And while Dr. Park doesn’t necessarily reciprocate the gesture, his eyes do seem to soften a bit when he sees her smile directed at him.
Or maybe she’s looking too much into it, who knows.
Emma hopes she’s not wrong though.
Joy did bring it up—just as she promised in the locker room a month ago—and while she kept probing until Emma admitted she might have a tiny crush on the older doctor, she never teased Emma about it.
Emma was thankful for that as coming to terms with it herself was something.
So Emma’s plan to get to know Dr. Park was in full swing.
Well, mostly.
It has been a month since she introduced herself to him and was shocked by him doing the same and while it has started her occasionally smiling at him, that was about how far she got.
And Emma is unsure if the next step should be actual conversation with him.
There aren’t many opportunities for one to be honest, as they work in different departments and he only comes down occasionally for consult and leaves right after.
And while Emma does want to get to know him, seeking him out seems a little overkill.
But then, just as she’s about to lose hope, it turns out she doesn’t really have to worry about looking for a reason to talk to him, because her clumsiness comes into play once more.
Emma is just walking through the hall with extra boxes of medical gloves that have run out in Trauma 2, trying to rip one of the boxes open when the door opens suddenly, the person on their way out immediately running into Emma.
The boxes in her hands go flying, Emma stepping back in shock and simultaneously saving herself from falling back.
One of Emma’s hand comes to grab at the stethoscope around her neck, refusing to let the expensive equipment meet the same fate as those poor gloves on the ground.
And of course the forsaken box finally ripped open when she dropped it, a few of the gloves now scattered around them.
Even after she’s steadied herself, a hand comes to tug on her wrist uselessly, fingers purposely pressing into her pulse point.
“Careful, I might start to think you’re doing this on purpose,” Emma raises her eyes away from the hand around her wrist, bated breath, “Emma.”
Emma smiles sheepishly up at him through her lashes, “maybe I am, Dr. Park.”
Shark eyes her, fingers still firmly against her rapidly increasing pulse, as if he’s counting each beat and memorising it.
It might be just because they’re medical staff or because they’re in a hospital, however him seeking out her heartbeat feels strangely private and entirely too intimate for the busy halls of the PTMC.
“You shouldn’t,” and he might be saying one thing, however his expression is saying something completely different.
Emma realises in shock that he is actually smiling at her when he says that.
Well, calling it a smile might be an overexaggeration, as it wouldn’t look like more than a raised corner of his mouth to an outside observer, it does to her though.
Perhaps she’s been watching him too much.
The very faint crinkles by his usually cold eyes that seem to be a little brighter in the moment, the slight dimple that appears next to his lips.
Emma takes the moment to just enjoy how incredibly different his face looks even with the slight change to his usual blank expression.
It makes him look younger somehow.
“And why is that?” Emma actually feels like she’s swimming in shark infested waters, every tiny movement alerting them to her whereabouts.
The question feels risky, as does the tilt of her head and the quick once-over she gives him.
Shark inhales sharply, the finger on her pulse point pressing in deeper, “it’s dangerous.”
There isn’t much known about Dr. Park, his answer barely revealing anything however Emma feels like she has an idea.
There is no doubt that jumping into the his orbit is dangerous and perhaps a foolish thing to do.
Nevertheless Emma is too weak to stop now, the magnetic pull she feels towards him overpowering her senses.
Not that she’s trying too hard to break out of the spell she fell under.
“Shark? I thought you had a case?”
A voice sounds somewhere to their right, breaking the moment Emma was unsure was ever going to end.
Not that she minded, silently cursing the person who interrupted.
Dr. Park, snapping out of his unblinking stare, drops his tight grip around Emma’s wrist, leaving Emma to mourn the loss of warmth against her skin.
And the fact that he now doesn’t know the exact speed of her heartbeat feels like bigger loss than it should.
“Yes, I do. I was just about to-,” Emma’s mouth opens as if she’s about to say something, however before she can even think about what, Park is long down.
Garcia, the one who interrupted their staring contest, gives her a once-over, lips pursed in disdain, “might want to pick these up, Nolan.”
Just as Emma mentioned, being around surgeons is usually quite an uncomfortable experience.
It’s not Emma’s fault Dr. Park is somehow exempt from that.
The expectation was there before she really met him, that she’d absolutely despise working with him as he’d make her feel even worse than all the other surgeons combined.
It was what everyone prepared her for after all.
That never happened though.
Before Emma even started thinking about getting closer to him, he was always nice to her.
Well, compared to other surgeons at least.
Emma nods hastily, crouching down to start picking up all the items now scattered around them, feeling like a child under Garcia’s stare.
And just when Emma starts believe Garcia is finally going to leave her alone, the older woman sighs.
“I don’t know what you’re doing with Shark,” the words make Emma freeze, her hand reaching for the next glove stopping midair, “but I’d advise you to rethink whatever it is and let it go.”
Emma doesn’t even have a chance to raise her head before Garcia starts walking in the same direction Dr. Park has, her heartbeat racing for an entirely different reason this time.
She can’t dwell on it right away, Dr. Robby calling for her from the actual Trauma 2 to get them the gloves, but Emma is sure she’ll overthink it later.
Garcia might mention it to Santos who’s a bigger gossip than Emma initially expected.
And then everyone will know and give her either amused glances or worse, looks full of pity for the poor young nurse who has an embarrassing crush on the cold surgeon.
Maybe even that Dr. Park won’t look her way again since they’ve been caught interacting.
He surely doesn’t need a young RN crushing on him, making eyes at him from across the hub.
But as it turns out, once again, Emma has nothing to worry about.
She is unsure whether that is because Shark hasn’t realised Garcia might tell someone or because he simply doesn’t care enough if anyone talks about him.
Emma hopes it’s the latter.
Perhaps he likes her enough to dismiss whatever anyone says about their infrequent interactions.
Likes feels like too big of a word for what he might feel for her as they’ve barely spoken with each other however Emma doesn’t really know what else to call it.
They shouldn’t be classified as strangers or just any random colleagues when she has all these feelings.
Maybe one day she’ll be able to find a word that describes it.
She doesn’t have to worry about his feelings for now because Dr. Park starts seeking her out himself.
Or as much as is in character for him.
They still don’t have many conversations, the two of them barely work the same cases let alone have enough space to share a few sentences.
But he does start nodding at her in greeting, his pseudo smile etched into his face every time she gives him a wide grin.
Emma feels giddy whenever she’s scheduled to work, the picture that he might come down to the ER and smile at her serving as a distraction to how difficult her job actually is.
And maybe that’s naive and stupid to see their interactions as anything significant.
Yet it means the world to her.
Knowing that they have this routine together feels big and special to Emma.
Because the idea that he might sometimes think of her, wonder whether she’s working when he’s about to come down to the ER, whether she’ll be there to give him a smile, makes her heart nearly beat out of her chest.
Shark also touches her a few times.
That sounds worse than it actually is whenever Emma thinks about it, his touch always strictly innocent and many times more professional than anything.
Emma wouldn’t think twice about those touches if it were to be any of her other colleagues.
With him, it feels different.
Maybe because he doesn’t really brush up against anyone else, reputation enough of a repellent to make people get out of his way without him even trying to.
Or perhaps because she seeks out those touches, unlike those of her coworkers most of the time.
His arm brushes against her briefly when he’s leaving the room, fingers linger when she’s handing him something in the examination room.
There’s tingles left behind when she feels his bare skin on hers, like he has real shark skin and forces her senses to go haywire with the rough texture.
Emma sometimes wonders if he has a thing for heartbeat, his finger always pressing into her pulse point whenever he grasps her wrist.
Not that it has happened many times.
But the three times are not coincidences.
It’d be unfair to judge him though, as she thinks about those moments more than anything.
Emma likes when Dr. Park knows the speed of her heartbeat, each quick squeeze of the organ suddenly feeling more important than it did prior to it.
It’s been close to three months since Emma has decided to break into the seemingly unbreakable walls around him and for the first time, she feels like she’s actually getting somewhere:
That maybe, the shark in the water smelt her blood and decided to hunt her down.