Chapter Text
Joseph was used to odd things; he’d heard about oddities from uncle Speedwagon and grandma Erina all of his life. It was a little different however when you’re suddenly face to face with the oddities, ah, well vampires, that you’ve heard about for so long. Wasn’t that supposed to have just been tall tales for children? That’s what his friends in school had said anyhow, Joseph wanted to say that he’d always trust the words of Speedwagon and Erina more than any other kid out there. But vampires… really?
Joseph would like to think he’d handled the situation with Straizo rather perfectly, but sitting in a cramped bathtub suddenly made him think the situation over again.
Hamon… vampires… stone masks…. Argh! It was giving him a damned headache that much was for sure.
Where did he go from now on? He was in some sort of mess now, wasn’t he?
Joseph sighed and got out of the bathtub, finally able to stretch his legs and twist his hips. Damn tiny bathtub. Wrapping a towel around his waist Joseph wandered out to the living room.
“Decency!” Erina called, her eyes not even having left the needlework she was messing around with.
“Yeah, yeah.” Joseph replied sloppily; all he wanted was a cold cola from the fridge, he’d retreat to his room after that. However, on his tracks to the kitchen he saw that a letter had been pushed through the letterbox. Joseph made a sound of curiosity, but picked up his cola first, then then letter; Joseph brought both with him to his room.
The letter was apparently from Speedwagon, now this really caught Joseph’s attention and he all but tore into the envelope. He hadn’t heard from uncle Speedwagon for weeks! What was that old quack up to now?
Dear Joseph,
First of all, I’m well and alive though I do believe the foundation has already informed you of that. I hope you did not worry too much about me, I may be an old man but I can handle myself quite well.
Joseph rolled his eyes, of course they’d been worried.
I am currently in Mexico right now, I seem to have found myself working with some German scientist now, or perhaps.. working for them? I can’t be too sure. We have discovered something rather interesting here in Mexico, you probably won’t believe me, but we have found what appears to be a man made of rock and no, no just a silly statue, he is a living and breathing organism. He resides in a wall surrounded by countless stone masks and right now we are cautiously moving forward with experiments. There must be some connection between this prehistoric man and the masks, perhaps I can figure out more about my own past; about the fight between your grandfather and Dio the vampire. The past still torments me so... This is something I must do, not only for my sake but for the world.
What I am trying to do here in this letter is apologize, for I do not know when I will return to you and Erina.
However Joseph, this isn’t a mere apology… I’m sorry to trouble you with so many things all of your life, but this letter is also a request.
The situation here in Mexico with these German’s is rather delicate; I want to be here and personally take care should something unexpected come to happen. At the same time, a new discovery has just been made in Rome, a whole set of three living organisms has been found in rock pillars. As of right now we call them the pillar men, and much like the one here in Mexico, they seem to have a connection with the stone mask. I want someone trustworthy to go there, and although I fully trust my foundation and it’s member, I think you would be more adequate as you seem to handle hopeless and panicky situations more or less well (remember the airplane incident?). What I’m getting at, is that I want you to look into the situation in Rome for a few months, make sure you know what’s happening and what the scientist are getting up to.
I do know that this leaves Erina out of the picture, but not to worry, I have sent her a separate letter to explaining the situation and should she wish to live with you in Italy all expenses will be paid for the both of you.
I hope you agree to this foolish old man’s request, such important matters are best left to the ones we trust the most. Family.
I do hope that once more discoveries have been made that maybe I can finally leave the past behind and enjoy the present to it’s fullest together with the two people I love most: you and Erina.
And just like that the letter ended. Joseph read it twice turned it sideways, upside-down and just about everything you could do with a letter. He frowned as he absorbed the information; but then a grin spread on his face. This sure sounded like one hell of an interesting adventure.
Joseph rested in his room for a while as he contemplated the situation. He would do it of course, no doubt about that. Speedwagon was asking for a favor and how much hadn’t Joseph put him through over the years? It was safe to say that Speedwagon deserved more than a favor, he deserved a damn award!
The only question was Erina. At her age, Joseph wouldn’t feel right leaving her in the US all by herself, but more than that, he’d just feel wrong being apart from her. Her coming or staying was a deciding factor in this ordeal.
Fully clothed Joseph threw himself onto the sofa next to Erina.
“So you received the letter did you? About time… damn post offices.” She mumbled and grumbled.
One of Joseph’s eyebrow’s rose. “You already got yours?” he asked as he poked at the socks she was creating.
“3 days ago.” She replied simply.
“Holy hell, yeah fuck the post office.” Joseph agreed.
“Language.” She warned him, effectively bringing out a boyish grin on Joseph’s face.
“So what’s the final verdict?” he asked after Erina had rolled her eyes.
Erina put down her needlework. “Well, I think we owe Speedwagon more than just a favor. Of course we’re going.” She told him as if it was just the natural way of things; much like Joseph, Erina hadn’t considered not helping out even for a second.
“Cool!” Joseph exclaimed, quickly rising from the sofa. “Should I start packing? When do we leave? Where will we live? Is it always hot in Rome?” Joseph started rambling and Erina ignored him effortlessly until she said:
“We leave in 2 weeks, after everything has been settled. Residency, visa… all of that.”
Joseph’s eyes grew in excitement. “I gotta tell Smokey! I’m heading out!” And passing by the coat rack he acquired his hat and bomber jacket, disappearing out the door in a flash.
2 weeks went by faster than Joseph would have liked; he’d only just settled into the American way of life and he was loving it! The jazz, the swing, the rock, the parties, the booze… The city was alive! And Joseph was having the time of his life, running from police who recognized him from the Straizo incident; Joseph would just laugh as he ran away, Smokey hot on his tail as he verbally complained about his life choices.
Eventually it all came to a quick end, Joseph shook Smokey’s hand but then embraced him so strongly that Smokey’s feet weren’t even touching the ground.
“I’m gonna miss you, you know that right Smokey?” Joseph asked, his voice tearful as he hid his teary eyes in Smokey’s shoulder.
Smokey would have tapped Joseph’s back in an attempt of amicable comfort, but Joseph was restraining even Smokey’s arms. “There, there big guy.” Smokey opted for verbal comfort. “We’ll probably see each other again anyway.”
Joseph let go of Smokey and looked at his small statured friend.
“I can’t really get rid of you, now can I?” Smokey asked him teasingly.
A bright smile spread on Joseph’s face, he wiped the snot running down his nose with his forearm. “Sure can’t.” Joseph agreed, and with a last brofist, Erina and Joseph walked into the airport; leaving good ol’ Smokey and New York City behind.
The moment they landed in Italy, Joseph breathed the new air deep into his lungs, a huge grin breaking out instantly.
Erina poked him lightly. A small smile was playing at her lips; she was just as excited. Nevertheless, “Aren’t you a bit too excited?” she asked.
“NO! Grandma Erina, we’re starting a whole new life! In ITALY!!” Joseph had stars shimmering in his eyes from sheer excitement.
“You said the same thing when we came to America.” She noted as they started walking away from the plane and towards the car that had been prepared for them.
“Yeah, but this is different. This is Italy!”
Erina giggled and this made Joseph smile softly. The car was loaded up with their stuff and Joseph and Erina were driven towards their apartment which was conveniently situated two blocks from the lab where the pillar men were situated.
Once they arrived however, a member of the Speedwagon foundation sat waiting in their new living room.
“Can I help you?” Erina asked politely as they approached the man.
“Word was sent to your previous residence America, have you received the letter?” he asked straight out.
Erina looked up at Joseph and then back at the man. “No, we haven’t received any letters. Why? Has something happened?” Her voice was already full of tragedy, a product of years exposed to more sorrow than she deserved.
The man smiled softly at her tone in an attempt to lighten the mood. “Not something grave; something very interesting. There has merely been a slight change in plans.” He turned towards Joseph. “The pillar men have awoken.” He told him, his tone more business and serious-like now.
Joseph frowned. “What do you mean “Awoken”?” he asked as he made air quotation marks around awoken.
“They have come to life; left the pillars and now move around like normal human beings.” Then his face turned grave. “Except they’re not. They are vampires and are dangerous specimens that must be studied. Your duties as a personal spy for Mr. Speedwagon has gained an additional job. As you are one of the few Hamon user that we know of and trust, you have been entrusted with the job of guarding the pillar men alongside another proficient hamon user.”
Joseph held his hand up. “Hold up hold up. Hold your horses there mister. Since when was I a spy?”
“Perhaps you have had the post described to you differently, but on official papers you were listed as spy.”
“Why couldn’t uncle Speedwagon just call me a spy instead of writing that long ass letter?” Joseph asked Erina, but she just hunched her shoulders in an uncaring gesture. Joseph sighed and threw his backpack on the ground. “Fine, but I better get a decent salary for that. So what is it now then? Babysitting alien rock men? Sounds fun.” Joseph finally acknowledged.
Two days passed with Erina and Joseph settling in at the apartment, apparently the other guy he was supposed to be working with would take of the situation until Monday when Joseph was able to come around.
And so, Monday came. Feeling rather strange Joseph took bold and confident steps towards the lab. He had a job now! Probably his first real full-time job since, well, this was probably the first time.
Arriving at the facility he was guided by some Speedwagon foundation members towards the area where the pillar men where located. From the outside, the lab didn’t seem too big; but it was humungous. They walked for a long ass time before they finally got to a door and stopped. The members told him that through it was his and his colleague’s employee lounge, with that said they left him to his own devices. Joseph cracked his knuckles along with a smile before pushing the door open, entering in his usual grandiose manner.
In the room sat a particularly handsome blonde man drinking coffee. He had feathers in his hair, which Joseph thought was kinda funny.
“Yahoo~!” Joseph called as he walked over to the man. “You Caesar?” he asked as he sat down in the chair next to him.
The blonde man didn’t look especially friendly, but eventually he nodded and reached out his hand which Joseph shook enthusiastically. “You must be Joseph.” He acknowledged. Then he muttered into his coffee. “The American amateur.”
“Hey hey hey! What’s that I hear?” Joseph asked, hand to his ear in gesture. “I’m an Englishman I’ll have you know!”
Caesar seemed to find that amusing. “So you don’t disagree with the fact you’re an amateur?” He asked.
“With hamon? Hell yeah I’m an amateur! But I don’t have no shame! You’re a descendant from a family of practitioners right? I’d be pretty embarrassing for you if I was better now wouldn’t it?” Joseph concluded, rather satisfied with himself.
Caesar scoffed, “Doesn’t change the fact that you’re only going to be a hindrance. There are plenty of Hamon users who could have taken your place.”
Joseph wanted to retaliate, but he couldn’t really expose the fact that the main reason for his being there was because of Speedwagon’s trust in him; so he stayed quiet. “Whatever.” Was all he replied.
A good minute passed with Joseph just sitting in his chair and looking around the room, Caesar sipping his coffee in peace.
“So is this what you do all day? Sip coffee? Doesn’t seem like that requires much Hamon combat experience.” Joseph commented sharply.
Caesar rolled his eyes and flipped a switch, the dark glassy pane in front of them turned translucent and on the other side of it were three large and muscular men, wearing next to nothing. One of them had long full purple hair, rich in color and vitality. He seemed to be studying a book as he scribbled some notes or whatever. One of them seemed to be training; he wore a nice looking crop top and some head garment that covered his hair, currently he seemed to be lifting some heavy looking weights. Then there was the last one who wore something reminiscent of a bra and seemed to be listening to the radio.
“Oh my God! Are these the pillar men?!” Joseph asked, eyes not leaving the men inside the room.
“Yes.” Caesar replied simply.
“What the do you mean ‘yes’, elaborate damn it!” Joseph demanded, fed up with the Italian’s attitude.
Caesar sighed. “Yes, they are the pillar men.”
“Can they see us??” Joseph asked as he touched the glass.
“Well, no. But they do know when we’re looking. They have unnaturally keen senses.”
“How long have they been here for?”
“About a week, maybe a bit more. Since they awoke, if that’s what you mean.”
“So how was it, when they awoke?” Joseph asked excitedly.
Caesar’s face turned dark at the memory and for a moment, it seemed like he wasn’t going to answer. But then he did. “There was an incident in the lab, I can’t tell you much of the details since I wasn’t personally there. But some blood was spilled onto the rocks and having sucked this up, they awoke. The theory goes that they were simply in great need of blood, for the moment the awoke they slaughtered everyone in the vicinity, sucking up every last drop of blood. The scientist here like to think that this was just a natural reaction after that long a slumber, but I think it’s just bullshit. They’re trying to convince themselves that they aren’t as dangerous as they obviously are, just for the sake of not having to terminate them.” Caesar finished. “It’s ridiculous.” He added as he glared with such fiery hate at the men behind the glass.
“Hey now, you said they had keen senses right? Won’t they feel your murderous intent if you keep staring like that?” Joseph asked cautiously, it really seemed like the blonde was just waiting for something or another to go on a killing spree. The look on his face sent shiver down Joseph’s back.
“It doesn’t matter if they feel it or not. Actually, I want them to know how I feel.” Caesar told him, defiance obvious in his eyes.
The Joseph frowned. Now he could see that having Caesar as a guard all alone would never have worked out, there were more than one reason for why Joseph was here it seemed.
“Don’t be an idiot. This is a job, pull yourself together you blonde feather head. This is for scientific purposes, there isn’t any room for you to hate them. Do your job.” Joseph scolded.
This made Caesar get up from his chair, and the heads behind the glass turned. “Who the fuck do you think you are?! Coming in here and lecturing me on a job you aren’t even qualified to perform!”
Joseph wasn’t about to back down, so he stood up and made himself big too. “Seems like you aren’t either from the looks of it! No wonder they sent an amateur like me when you’re too hotheaded to even use your skills properly!” Joseph barked back.
Then, there came a knocking on the glass pane that startled both of them out of their argument. Caesar’s leg bumped into the sofa table and he effectively spilled his coffee cup; it shattered on the floor and the sound dissipated the hot and angry air in the room.
The man with long purple hair stood behind the glass with an unamused look on his face.
“What do we do?” Joseph whispered to his colleague.
Caesar had gotten calm at this point and simply sighed. “I’m going to clean this mess up, you go in and introduce yourself.” Caesar said, like it was just normal people behind the glass. He could tell Joseph got a little nervous. “Don’t be such a wuss.” He told him dismissively as he exited the room.
Joseph gulped, the purple haired man seemed to be waiting. Joseph unlocked the door and entered.
“Aha, I knew I smelled fresh meat!” The man by the radio called as he turned off the broadcast.
“Who might you be?” The purple haired man asked.
“Joseph Joestar! Now it’s your turn.” He said happily, but then it occurred to him. “Well, do you umm, have names?”
The purple haired man scoffed. “How rude, of course we have names.”
The man who was training walked up to the two. “Have some respect human, before you stands Kars himself.”
“Well alright, and I’m supposed to know who that is?” Joseph asked defiantly.
Kars seemed to find that amusing, a sly and subtle grin appeared on his face. “It matters not.” He said.
The crop top man looked surprised and slightly horrified, just as bra man over in the back did.
“Lord Kars…”
Kars held up his hand dismissively. “Yes, I know what you’re thinking Wham. But our past matters not. After some contemplation, I have come to the conclusion that I wish to conquer this world through different means. These are different times after all, and it would be an interesting challenge.” Kars told the man, he seemed rather excited as he said this, the cheeky glint in his eyes did promise interesting things would follow.
“So is this why we have not yet gone in search of the stone?” Wham asked. “Is this why you have spent days with human scriptures?”
“Yes, but this is not the place to discuss future plans. We were talking about Joseph Joestar, now weren’t we?” Kars said as he turned towards Joseph again.
“Ummm,” Joseph was feeling decidedly out of place.
“So how old are you?” Kars asked.
“Eh, 18 this year.” He replied.
Kars started laughing with no shame. Wham seemed like he just wanted to go back to his training, but common manners forbade him to leave at this point. “18? Really?? Why, you’re no more than an infant!”
“Heh, better an infant with baby smooth skin than being old fuckers like you guys!”
Kars seemed more amused with each second that passed. “You are truly an interesting individual Joseph Joestar. Most fail to speak when aware of the fact that their talking to prehistoric Gods.” Kars challenged.
“I’m rather accustomed to the world of the bizarre, and call me Jojo. That’s what most people do anyways.” Joseph told them casually.
“I see.” Kars said as he looked Jojo up and down, an elevator look that really packed some sensual prowess. Joseph gulped; where on earth did the sexual tension suddenly come from?? Kars touched Joseph’s bulky and defined biceps. “You aren’t too bad of a specimen it seems.” At this Wham seemed to regard Joseph a little differently as well, and it wasn’t hard to notice the bra guy in the back approaching with an aura much like the others.
Joseph felt his head heating up as he figured now would be a great time to remember the fact that these obviously very sexy men were so scantly clad.
It was apparent to Joseph that a critical situation like the one that was unfolding called for the Joestar secret technique.
With an undignified scream Joseph untangled himself and ran out of the room.
In the much darker room Caesar was sitting with an expression of pure disbelief. “I cannot believe this. Were you just flirting with the specimen?!” He demanded.
“WHAT?! No!” But then Joseph recalled the situation better, there had obviously been some kind of flirting going on. “They were flirting with me!”
Caesar threw his hand into the air. “I can’t do this. I’m contacting Mr. Speedwagon.” He said as he left the room, smacking the door as he left.
Joseph slumped into the chair and held his head in his hands. “Oh my God, Oh my God, what???” he sighed and calmed himself a little. “What just happened?” he asked himself.
Then he heard the pillar men start to speak, there was a speaker in the employee lounge, so he could hear them crystal clear.
“What are your true intentions Lord Kars?” he heard Wham ask as he turned to watch them.
“Of course it is to rule the world that is rightfully ours; but in due time Wham. I’d like to do some research first and the men in this facility have so far been providing me with whatever material I have desired.” Kars responded as he got back to his book.
“Of course…” Wham agreed. “But just now, with the man… what were your intentions with him?”
“Don’t be so coy Wham, you aren’t as innocent as you’d like to think. He was handsome, that much you could see couldn’t you? We have been in here for a good couple of days, don’t you miss the countless slaves we had to take care of our every need? I have been feeling rather pent up…”
Wham started to blush at what Kars was hinting at, as did Joseph; he was pretty sure his brain was being steamed at this very moment.
Then the bra man appeared from behind Kars, his hand seductively going down to Kars’s chest. “I can take care of you.” He suggested as he moved his hair aside and kissed his neck hotly.
Joseph was damn glad Caesar wasn’t here to see this because oh my fucking God, what in the hell was going on?????
Kars laughed softly at the man’s suggestion. “Esidisi…” He called seductively, and ooooh my God his voice just sounded like pure sex. Joseph wanted to cover his ears and look away… but he couldn’t.
Kars closed his eyes in pleasure as Esidisi made his way onto his lap and they started snogging like there was no tomorrow, Esidisi feeling him up, teasing him as he made his way up Kars’s bare thighs but then stopped to run his hands along his back instead.
It was probably the most erotic thing Joseph had ever seen in his life, just as the two pillar men were pitching tents, as was Joseph. Joseph couldn’t help it… blame it on teenage hormones or something of the like, maybe even blame it on the thrill of the situation. But Joseph couldn't help gripping the swollen length over the fabric of his hellishly tight jeans. When would he ever get to see something like this again? Fucking never that’s when. So what was the big deal if he wanted to enjoy it a little, Joseph was pretty sure anyone would drool at what he was seeing before him, just like Joseph was.
Kars seemed to find the situation amusing, a satisfied smirk was playing on his features as he gently pushed Esidisi’s head down towards his groin. Esidisi smiled as well, gripping Kars’s cock over the fabric, just like Joseph was doing to his own. He teased it a bit, even going as far as to kiss the tip before he suddenly flipped the loincloth away, exposing the glory of Kars’s erect member for all to see.
Joseph gasped and gripped his own cock tighter, he could feel it throbbing beneath his pants; begging to be released from it’s prison. When Esidisi’s mouth closed around Kars’s member, Joseph couldn’t help it. It was just too much; he frantically he started to take his belt and zipper down, only sparing one glance behind him before he turned back to the scenario before him.
He groaned instantly as he saw the way Kars looked at Esidisi with his hooded and seductive eyes and the way Esidisi seemed to be absolutely loving it as he sucked Kars off. Joseph felt himself grow hot as he imagined those full lips around his own member, and just thinking about it almost made him quiver
The Aztec like jewellery that covered their bodies, the sweat that was making their tanned skin glow, the definition of their muscles and the expressions on their faces… Joseph starting jacking his cock off even harder, licking his lips as he wished nothing more than to get right back into that room.
Just as he could see the expression in Kars’s face change, his hand gripping harder at Esidisis hair, his breathing getting erratic... the sigh was too erotic and Joseph started nearing his climax. He was close, oh so close, and just before he could feel the tension rising, his eyes drifted over towards Wham who was sitting some distance away. The man was looking right at him, his eyes hard and judging.
This took Joseph over the edge and he came right then and there into his hands, groaning something incoherent as he closed his eyes in ecstasy. Once he opened his eyes again his gaze fell to the ground, and even as he heard Kars moaning as he reached his own climax, Joseph couldn’t look up again. He knew… that they knew…. There was no way they didn’t know he’d been jacking off to them. Wham had been staring right at him. There was no way that was coincidental. Oh my God, this had probably just been an elaborate plan to make fun of the new guy… ha ha, real funny.
Joseph touched his cock again, it was still tingling with post-orgasmic euphoria and he groaned as he gave it some last few pumps. The expression on Wham’s face was etched into his memory and the judging cold stare made him shiver all over and he enjoyed the last pleasures of his orgasm.
Dick inside his pants, Joseph sighed.
This was going to get difficult.