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“We need to stop doing this.”
I groaned and let my head drop back against the couch, reluctantly pausing my media and turning my actual eyes back on. Gurathin was standing over me, his eyes sad and his mouth pinched in the familiar way that meant he’d worked himself up into some obscene guilt spiral. Again.
(Honestly, it was a huge improvement that we’d gotten to the point where he’d at least talk to me when he got like this. It made it much easier to solve the problem when he wasn’t starving himself out of a misplaced sense of self-loathing.)
I reached over and grabbed his hands where he’d been wringing them together so fiercely that I was mildly concerned for the continued safety of his fingers. I upped the temperature in my own hands and internally preened when I felt some of the tension leave them. (Touching was still a little bit hit or miss for me, but it was always nice when I could frame it in the context of winning. Getting him to relax definitely counted.)
“Why?” I asked flatly. “What’s got you so worked up this time?”
His gaze slid off me to land somewhere on the floor, his eyebrows scrunching a little in distress.
“I lost control again. Last night. One of these days I’m going to hurt you and I can’t let that– .”
I couldn’t help it. I cut him off with a snort of amusement.
“Listen, Gurathin. You’re an augmented human. I’m a SecUnit. There’s nothing you could do in the heat of the moment that would hurt me.”
That got his attention. His eyes shot back to mine and his lips curled back in a way that showed off the points of his fangs. He was getting frustrated now. He must have been spending a lot of time thinking about this if he was already worked up enough that his fangs were out.
“We both know I’m more of a threat than the typical augmented human. Void’s sake, SecUnit, you let me put my teeth in your neck on a semi-regular basis! You can’t possibly tell me that’s an acceptable risk. I might not be nearly as strong as a construct, sure, but I’m strong enough that I could damage you like that if I caught you unaware.”
I leveled him with an unimpressed stare. “So could a particularly dedicated avian fauna. You aren’t special. Besides, I’m always paying very close attention to you when you’re biting me. You couldn’t possibly catch me unaware.”
Judging from the blush that bloomed across his cheeks at that, I think I might have just revealed a little too much. We hadn’t talked much about why I was so willing to do this for him. The emotions that made me want to take care of him in any way I could, more than any of my other humans. I tried not to look at them too closely. They made my chest feel warm and gooey when I held him close and when he’d sigh happily and curl up against my chest once he was done feeding and that was all I needed to know.
“Look, would it make you feel better if I performed a full threat assessment and gave you the file? Then you’d know exactly how little of a danger you are to me, even if you were to lose control.”
He blinked, as if surprised I was willing to take him seriously at all. “What exactly would that entail?”
I shrugged one shoulder lazily. “Standard security check for risk of damage or injury. In this case, it’d be mostly checking the dimensions of your fangs so I can get an accurate read of your maximum physical damage output.”
He stared at me in silence for a moment, clearly considering it. He nodded slowly. “I– yes. I think that having concrete data would be helpful.”
I rolled my eyes a little at his formality and stood up, gesturing for him to take a seat on the couch. When he sat down, he perched on the very edge of the cushion, wrapping his arms around himself as he hunched forward. I clicked my tongue at him. “This isn’t going to work with you curled up and hiding.” I braced my knee on the couch and hauled him up so he was sitting mostly reclined with his upper back leaning against the armrest. “There, that’s better,” I said, looking him over and nodding in satisfaction. His legs had ended up awkwardly folded half-underneath him, but they wouldn’t get in my way so it was fine.
I used the knuckle of one finger to tilt his head back into a better position. He went with the motion without complaint, though his eyes did go a little wide. We sat there in awkward silence for a moment. Was he waiting for a formal invitation?
I tapped my thumb against his bottom lip. “Open,” I demanded. He sucked in a sharp breath, but let his jaw fall open so I could get at his fangs.
I slid my thumb between his cheek and his teeth, pulling his cheek to the side to get a better look and switching my primary visuals to a drone so I wouldn't have to practically stick my face in his mouth. I hummed absentmindedly. His fangs came to a pretty sharp point, but they were slim enough that they were incredibly unlikely to do any real damage to me. Even if he decided to try tearing my throat out one of these days, he was more likely to hurt himself than me.
I stroked the side of one fang in a smooth up-and-down motion. As I thought, it was only the very tip that was sharp. Good for piercing flesh on the initial bite, but we wouldn't have to worry about him causing further slicing damage if he moved while his fangs were in me.
Not that he tended to move much after a bite. lf anything, he was more inclined to sort of melt against me until my support was pretty much the only thing keeping his body upright.
(In the privacy of my own mind, I could admit that I sort of liked it when he did that. I liked seeing him soft and vulnerable. I liked knowing he trusted me enough to willingly put himself in that state. I liked the way he relied on me to take care of him and I liked taking care of him.
I had even started to like the way he'd often get whiny and desperate afterwards. It'd been a surprise to both of us to find out that he found the act of feeding from me arousing. He'd had to face the wall in sheer embarrassment once he'd come to his senses, explaining that meals had always been a source of stress and pain for him in the Corporation Rim so he had no experience drinking from someone who made him feel safe enough to let go of his ironclad self-control.
I'd found it a little off-putting at first. My experiences with human sex parts had been wholly negative for the vast majority of my runtime, but he was always good about my boundaries. He never asked me to touch it, for one. Even when he got really worked up and tried rutting against me, he'd still let me reposition him in a way that limited contact with little to no complaint. He wasn't trying anything, he was just responding to stimuli. That realization had made me reconsider my position against all things sexual. I had to admit, I did like making him lose control.)
Moving slowly so he wouldn't choke, I repositioned my hand so I could rub at the teeth just past his fangs. Like all humans and augmented humans, his teeth had developed to allow for the ripping and tearing of meat, along with whatever other foodstuffs made up their diet. I suppose that still technically posed a safety risk, but not much more than it would for literally any other human with a full set of teeth. At most, he'd be able to do some surface damage to my organic skin layer. Nothing that would pose a substantial danger to me at all. A minor, easily-fixed annoyance, at worst.
Satisfied that I was right about him not being of any particularly notable danger to me, I switched my primary visual input back to my actual eyes and let the drone I’d been using float away. I glanced towards him, ready to deliver my security report in a tone that definitely couldn’t be classified as incredibly smug.
Oh.
I realized a bunch of things in pretty quick succession:
First of all, I hadn’t actually removed my fingers from Gurathin’s mouth yet.
Second, he seemed in no particular rush to have me remove my fingers from his mouth. Actually that’s an understatement. He looked very happy to keep my fingers in his mouth for the foreseeable future. His pupils were blown wide, his eyes glistening like he was on the verge of tears. (He’d had to explain to me that he had a habit of tearing up when he got overwhelmed, even if the emotions overwhelming him were good ones. In particular, it was often a sign of intense arousal for him. It still made Client in Distress messages pop up, but I’d gotten used to dismissing those when we were together.) There was a thin line of drool trailing out of the side of his mouth. Kind of gross, but no more gross than the saliva already on my skin from willingly putting my hand in his mouth.
Third, he had his hands clenched so tightly in the fabric of his pants that his knuckles had gone white. Judging from the desperate look in his eyes (and from the fact that I’d been all but petting his fangs), I was pretty sure it was from the force of will he was using to keep still and not bite me. All of his instincts were probably going haywire trying to figure out why there was warm skin in his mouth if he wasn’t going to try and feed from it.
Fourth, I really really liked him like this.
I sat there watching him for a long moment. Eventually, he realized that I was no longer mapping his fangs and his eyes refocused on me. He blinked hard, causing a tear to roll down one of his cheeks. He took a shaky breath around my fingers and pinged me a wordless query that was saturated in hazy metadata.
He didn’t try pulling away from me, though. Once he stopped being such an asshole, he really could be so pleasant.
I rubbed my thumb against his cheek lightly, relishing in the way it made him shiver almost imperceptibly.
“See? You can’t hurt me. Not unless I let you.”
He relaxed into my hold, leaning his cheek just a little further into my palm and letting his eyes flutter closed.
I resumed my exploration of his mouth, brushing lazily against his fangs now that I wasn’t paying so much attention to building a potential damage report. A thought hit me then and I considered it for barely a second before putting my new plan into motion. Maybe Gurathin deserved a little reward for his good behavior.
I carefully applied more pressure on my next stroke of his fang, letting the sharp point cut a neat slice into the pad of my finger. Beneath me, Gurathin’s eyes shot open at the familiar feeling of fangs through flesh. I shushed him before he had the chance to do something stupid like try to squirm out from under me.
Good boy. Just stay still for me.
(It was so much easier to praise him over the feed. For one thing, I didn’t have to hear my own voice saying it.)
Moving slowly so I wouldn’t nick myself, I rotated my hand so I could press my finger to his tongue, smearing the now-beading drop of blood onto it. He let out a pathetic sort of whimper at the taste, but stayed as still as he possibly could.
There you go. Do you want more?
Gurathin’s breath caught audibly in his throat and he looked up at me with those wide, desperate eyes. He pinged me a somewhat frantic affirmative, seemingly unwilling to move his head even to nod in response.
Then go ahead.
I smirked a little when he immediately moved to close his mouth around my finger. I decided to tease him. Just a little.
I pulled my finger away from his mouth, ignoring the way he automatically tried to follow it until he ran up against the pressure of my other hand on his jaw, holding him back. “One condition,” I said, pleased by how quickly he nodded. “No biting. You only get what I give you. Can you do that for me?”
His eyes darted between my face and my hand. “Yes, SecUnit.” His voice had just an edge of roughness to it. I liked it when that happened, it meant his self-restraint was starting to fail him. And that meant I was winning.
Still, that was no excuse for forgetting what I’d told him days earlier. I gave his augments a reproachful sting, sharp enough to get my point across but gentle enough not to really hurt.
I know I already told you what to call me when we’re doing this.
Gurathin flushed hotly. “Yes, Murderbot. I’ll be good, I promise.” His voice was hardly louder than a whisper, but that was fine.
I inclined my head approvingly and let Gurathin take my finger back into his mouth.
I had been worried that the wetness of his mouth would be too much for me now that I wasn’t focused on a task, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as I’d thought. Sure, it was still objectively a little gross, but it was worth it for the way it made Gurathin’s vitals go all wobbly in the way that I’d learned meant he was having an excellent time.
I’d expected him to try sucking on the wound to get more blood to flow, but he was just letting it bleed sluggishly onto his tongue. Every few seconds, he’d lap at it lightly, ensuring that he didn’t miss a drop, but otherwise he just sat there and took what I was giving him.
He looked so incredibly pleased to be exactly where he was. Not the kind of smug pleased that he got when he thought he’d won one of our verbal sparring matches, but the kind he got when he was so blissed out on blood and arousal that he couldn’t possibly imagine a better situation to be in right then.
I was so focused on his face that it took me a little while to realize his sex parts had gotten interested in what was happening too. (Or maybe they’d been interested this whole time and I’d been too busy to notice? Whatever, it’s not like Gurathin was complaining.) Every once in a while, his hips twitched up against nothing out of some human instinct.
I was feeling particularly generous (and a little bit curious) so I reached out and placed a hand on him where his sex parts were tenting the fabric of his pants. That drew a muffled groan out of him and he visibly restrained himself from thrusting up against my hand.
What are you– ?
I shushed him again and continued my tentative exploration of his sex parts. This really wasn’t as bad as I’d feared, especially considering the layers of fabric separating me from actually touching it. There was a small wet spot slowly forming where his pants were straining most. It was far less damp than his mouth had been, though, so that was fine too. (Humans really did produce a lot of fluids. I wasn’t sure if that was standard or if Gurathin was just an especially leaky individual, but I decided I didn’t really want to know.)
I'm taking care of you. Your body has a lot of biological needs, doesn't it?
I don't– I don't need– You don't have to do that.
I don't have to do anything. Wasn't that the whole point of this assessment? You can't hurt me and you can’t make me do anything. I'm the one in control here.
I hadn’t expected that to make Gurathin whine again as he nodded as best he could around my fingers. (Shockingly, not a whole lot of people find comfort in the idea of a SecUnit being the one in control. I guess it shouldn’t have come as a surprise that this was just another way that Gurathin and I were similarly fucked up.)
Good. So stop finding reasons to object and just let me take care of you.
I punctuated my message by grinding the heel of my hand down against his sex parts. That made his hips jump again in a way that was oddly appealing. I kept my hand pressed against him, providing friction for him to buck into while my fingers explored the length of him (what I could reach from my position outside of his pants, at least. Maybe one of these days I would be curious enough to touch him skin-to-skin here, but not today.)
As per usual, it took hardly any time at all for his movements to become erratic and soon enough he was tensing under me, his eyes rolling up as he sobbed into my hand. Under my fingers, I could feel his sex parts pulsing. That was weird, but not objectionable. He certainly seemed to like it when I very gently squeezed him in time with the pulses.
He was panting around me so I pulled my fingers out of his mouth (wiping my fingers on his shirt while he was distracted) to let him breathe properly as he recovered.
He looked wrecked. His chin was wet where he’d drooled on himself and his hair was a complete mess. I saved a snapshot to permanent storage. He looked up at me with teary eyes in an expression of what I can only describe as awe.
“I told you that you were no threat to me. Do you believe me now?”
He laughed, slightly hysterically. “Yeah, okay, you win. I still want to see that threat assessment report, but you’ve made your point.
I felt the corners of my mouth turn up in a small, pleased smile. Winning was great, but it was even better when Gurathin admitted it.