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Shane Hollander Is An Asshole

Summary:

Ilya declares that the day after Shane and Ilya were outed to Shane's parents is Shane's day to do whatever he wants. Ilya would later regret this decision.

Notes:

This is the first time Ilya and Shane ride bikes together. It is so dumb, please enjoy.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Morning sunlight filled the room, making Ilya groan and pull Shane closer to his chest. He hid his face against the back of his neck and tried, willed himself back to sleep. Regardless, his mind was awake and the smell of Shane’s shampoo was enough to rouse him fully from his sleep. He smiled to himself against the back of Shane’s neck, remembering the evening before.

They had been caught by David and were forced to reveal the truth about Shane’s sexuality and who Ilya was to Shane. His boyfriend. 

When the two of them returned to the cottage, Shane had looked so relieved that his parents finally knew. He wasn’t happy that that was how they found out, but they knew and Ilya wasn’t going anywhere. 

Ilya danced his fingers with a featherlight touch over Shane’s stomach and kissed the back of his neck. Shane made a soft noise between a grumble and contented acceptance. Ilya pressed himself against Shane’s back and kissed that spot behind his ear. 
He earned a moan.

“Ilya, it is so early,” Shane said, his voice thick with sleep. 

“Mm, yes, but I have my boyfriend here and I know he loves morning sex as much as I do,” Ilya moved a hand up to squeeze his pec. 

“You’re so annoying,” Shane groaned and flipped onto his back. He looked up at Ilya and couldn’t help the stupid lopsided grin that adorned his face when he saw Ilya glowing in the sunlight. Ilya immediately matched him with the same stupid grin. 

You are my boyfriend and I am in love with you,” Ilya punctuated each word with a finger tapping over Shane’s heart. 

Boyfriend,” Shane mimicked in response, so quiet Ilya could only hear it because of how close he was. Ilya leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, then his jaw. 

“I think it is your special day Shane, moy lyubimmy, what do you want to do? After we make love very slowly for hours?” Shane laughed and put a hand on the back of Ilya’s neck to pull him down for another kiss. 

“I’ve been wanting to show you some of the trails around here. I think you’ll like them, they’re beautiful.” 
Ilya’s smile grew impossibly bigger. 

“That was a boring answer wasn’t it?” 

“Mm, yes. But, if you want boring day we will have best boring day of your life.” 

Ilya reached over to the night stand where a bottle of lube was sitting, waiting for its time to shine. They had fucked rough the night before in various positions, in between kisses and declarations of mineminemine

He grabbed the bottle and pushed the sheets down their bodies, kissing Shane’s shoulder, “spread your legs, zaichik.” 
Shane let out a small laugh, an exuberant exhale of breath. He was still riding the high of their label. They had finally stamped boyfriends on their relationship and it was something Shane had sometimes felt he would never get to experience with Ilya. 
As Ilya worked him open, Shane played with his mess of curls, letting the small moans and whines fall from his lips without embarrassment. He watched the concentrated expression of the man he loved move his fingers in and out of his body, the body that he knew better than Shane did most of the time. 

“M’ready,” Shane pulled him back down for a quick kiss then moved them around so he was straddling Ilya’s hips, watching the latter slick himself up. He tilted Ilya’s face up to look at his own and they smiled at each other, they were love sick. 
He reached behind himself and lined Ilya’s cock up with his hole and slowly, slowly sunk down on it; taking him inch by inch. 

“Oh, fuck, Ilya. You were made to fuck me,” Shane dug his fingers into Ilya’s shoulders, trying to get a good grip before slowly moving his hips, riding him like they had all the time in the world. 
Ilya’s mouth hung slightly open, his head leaned back against the bed frame. He held onto Shane’s hips and let himself feel every inch of his warmth, the spasms, the grinding, it was perfect. It was always perfect.

“Da, like that, keep uh—“ he was cut off by his own moan, “keep going like that. You feel so good, so perfect. Ya tebya lyublyu, I love youIloveyouIloveyou.” 
They continued to have slow sex, laced with sweet nothings and declarations of love. 


Later, after they had gotten out of bed, put the sheets in the washer, took a shower, got dressed, and Ilya had made them lunch, the topic of the day was broached again. 

“It’s the perfect temperature outside for this, oh! Do not let me forget the sun block.” Shane was putting their plates away and walking around the kitchen looking for where he had put the sun block. 
Ilya watched in amusement as Shane went about the space. He found it soon enough and was lathering Ilya up.

“This is a bit extreme, no?” Ilya laughed as Shane stood between his legs rubbing the sunblock into Ilya’s face and neck.

“No, you’re white and you sunburn very easily,” A smile tugged on the corner of Shane’s mouth. 

Ilya kissed the inside of Shane’s wrist, “I trust you, especially when you are mama hen.” Shane gave him an absurd look before they both burst out laughing. 

After they were both properly lathered up, safe from the sun’s harmful rays, Shane led Ilya to the backyard and stood in front of the side of the house looking down at two bikes.

“Oh, I guess Dad brought them over,” He looked from the bikes to Ilya whose face was blank. 

“Ilya? I thought it would be easier to just ride bikes through the trail so I texted Dad while you were making lunch.” Ilya nodded with a tight smile on his face and looked at the bikes like they had personally offended him. 
Shane grabbed the handle bars to the bike that was obviously his, and Ilya followed suit with the other bike that must’ve been David’s. 

Ilya’s heart was pounding in his chest as he followed Shane, the pedal hitting him in the shin every few steps. 
The panic rose to his throat, Ilya was not going to embarrass himself in front of Shane, so he dropped the bike.
“Ah! I have cramp in my leg!” Ilya sat on the grass and rubbed at an imaginary pain, putting on the most convincing show of his life. “Go on without me, Hollander. I will not walk again today.” 
Shane placed the kick stand down and left his bike to go to Ilya’s side, kneeling next to him on the grass. 

“Shit. Let me rub it out,” Shane quickly threw a glance over his shoulder that said don’t, “Which leg is it?” Ilya pathetically pointed to his right leg and laid back in the grass, slinging an arm over his face. He groaned when Shane started to massage his calf, mostly because there was nothing there for him to work out. Ilya absentmindedly thought to himself that he should definitely let Shane give him a real massage.

“Ow!” Ilya sat up and smacked Shane’s hand, “You are trying to turn my leg into jello.” Shane sat back on his heels and looked over Ilya slowly, stopping when his eyes met Ilya’s. 

“Why do you look guilty?” 

“I do not look guilty. You look guilty.” Okay, nice one, Ilya. Ilya knew Shane was onto him but he wasn’t going to give up that easily. 

“Ilya, do you not know how to ride a bike?” Shane’s voice was soft, kind. Ilya scoffed, mock offended that Shane would even suggest something like that.

“Of course I know how to ride bike, Shane. I just got cramp in my leg,” He rolled his eyes, hoping Shane would drop it. 

“Which leg was it again? I should get you some ice,” Shane asked innocently. 

“Uh, the left one.”

“Ha! You are lying,” Shane swung a leg over Ilya’s hips and pinned his arms above his head. “You don’t know how to ride a bike.” 
Ilya blushed a deep crimson and tried to look anywhere but Shane’s face. 
Shane thought it was cute, but he knew how Ilya was about things. He kissed all over his face. 

“Ilya, you don’t have to be embarrassed with me,” He pressed a soft kiss to his lips. 

Ilya sighed, “I just never needed to learn.” 

“That’s okay. Let me teach you!” Shane sat upright on top of Ilya. The latter grabbed his hips and pulled him a little higher onto his torso, they were dangerously close to catching a public sex charge, though Shane didn’t seem to notice.
Ilya watched as Shane went on, excitedly talking about getting to teach Ilya how to do something, and Ilya watched Shane with a small smile on his face, rubbing his thighs gently. Once Shane realized Ilya wasn’t listening to him, he leaned back down and gave him another quick kiss. 

“You let me teach you how to ride a bike and you get to choose what we’re doing tonight.” A wicked grin adorned Ilya’s face as he gently shoved Shane off of him and got up and picked up the bike from where he pushed it over. Shane followed suit, kicking the stand back and straddling his own bike. He looked back at Ilya who was watching him with the intensity of a man that was planning on perfecting the art of riding a bike. 
Shane bit his lip to keep from laughing and gave him very specific instructions on what to do. Ilya followed each step one by one and then he was off. 

Shane was shocked at the quick learning curve and started following behind him, pedaling his feet. 

Ilya yelled, “Is so easy! I am better bike rider than anyone!” With all the confidence that he always carried in everything he did. Shane laughed loudly, then watched in horror as Ilya went from a vertical position to a horizontal one on the ground. 

“Ilya!” He dropped his bike near Ilya’s and pulled the bike off the top of him.

“Mother fucker, the bike betrayed me,” Ilya pulled his knee to his chest looking at the bloodied scrape. “Fucking nature,” He continued on with a slew of Russian slurs. 

“C’mon, let’s get you back to the cottage,” Shane helped Ilya up and let him lean his weak side against him as they hobbled back towards the house. 

“Shit, I didn’t think you were going to fall, you actually were doing really well.” 

“I ride bikes at the gym so it was not so hard, but the bike apparently cannot go over a rock.” Shane turned his head to the side to hide his grin and the laughter that was bubbling up from his chest.

They made it inside and Ilya sat on a chair in the kitchen.Shane refused to make eye contact as he looked for the first aid kit.

“It was not even big rock,” Ilya shook his head in disbelief, “This is bullshit.” Shane returned in front of Ilya with the supplies and ripped open a packet that contained an alcohol wipe. He couldn’t hide his smile anymore.

“Maybe you should stick to the stationary bikes at the gym,” He laughed as his cleaned over the wound.

Ilya hissed at the stinging pain, “Shane Hollander, are you making fun of me?” Shane bit his lip again, but this time he couldn’t hold in the laughter. 

“No, no,” He applied an antibiotic over the cut before putting on a bandage.

“Yes, you are. Oh my god, I am in love with an asshole.” 

That really set Shane off, he was laughing so hard his abs were burning. He waved a hand in front of Ilya’s face trying to signal that he wasn’t laughing at him. 

Ilya cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled, “Everyone, Shane Hollander is still an asshole!” 

Notes:

I've been really sick lately and this is as much as I could get out. See y'all soon. ;)