Chapter Text
"I have to go back, Baur!” Lilia cried.
“they’ll kill you!” Baur exclaimed. “they already killed Maleanor, they’ve taken over the castle, they’ll kill you if you step foot in there!”
“exactly,” Lilia’s voice grew cold. “they killed Maleanor. The senate took Malleus from me, and I’m no longer General. What else do I have? If I die, I’d rather do it where she did.”
“Lilia…”
Lilia sighed. “oh, what am I saying? I don't want to die, Baur… I just… I need to see it. I need to know what’s happening there.”
Baur placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “I understand. And I’ll come with you. To make sure you’re safe.”
Lilia smiled. A small, tired smile that barely reached his eyes, but he smiled. “Thank you, Baur. Truly,”
☆☆☆
Lilia and Baur walked slowly through the forest, the silence resting heavily in the air, a constant reminder of their losses.
Lilia didn’t know what he wanted from this trip. confirmation that Maleanor was dead? the sight of castle Wildrose overrun by humans?
but he had to go. He had to see. to… be there.
Baur worried about Lilia. He was sure to get captured if he got too close to the castle. And Baur was sure he’d try to get close. He remembered Lilia’s earlier statement about dying where Maleanor did, and it did nothing to soothe his nerves. Was Lilia planning to get captured on purpose?
But they never reached the castle. They got close, it was in sight, but Lilia suddenly stopped.
“...Do you hear that?”
Baur strained to listen to the forest, but heard nothing out of the ordinary.
until he did.
it was a voice. a weak, dying voice. as Lilia and Baur got closer, they could make out words.
“...’m… sorry, Leah… please…” the speaker whispered, choking out their last words. “stay… safe. keep… keep our baby safe…”
Just as the voice died down, Lilia and Baur managed to reach the speaker.
both froze as they saw him.
the dawn knight.
their enemy.
the man who killed Maleanor.
the man who is dying in front of them.
“Baur…” Lilia breathed. “it’s him.”
“...it is,”
“we can… we should kill him.” Lilia drew his magearm. “Right here. He's weak. He can't defend himself.”
Baur watched silently as Lilia stalked toward the fallen, injured man, and held up his magearm, about to swing down.
but he couldn't.
“Baur. He’s defensless,”
“He is,”
“...He’s defenseless…”
Lilia dropped the magearm and fell to his knees, the words of the knight circling in his head.
I'm sorry, he had said. stay safe.
keep our baby safe.
how could the knight, the man who had killed Raverne and Maleanor and so many other fae, be so… vulnerable? So real? How could that man have feelings when he destroyed so many lives? how could he have a family when he ripped apart Lilia’s own?
Lilia couldn’t kill him.
it's just because he’s defenseless, Lilia told himself, staring blankly at the fallen knight. It's because he’s defenseless and Lilia can’t hurt someone too weak to protect themself.
the Knight’s face as he let Lilia, carrying Malleus’s egg, go when he ran from castle Wildrose flashed through Lilia’s memory.
and he found himself picking the man up and dragging him away, Baur following silently behind.
“It's just so I’ll have a chance to duel once he’s healed,” Lilia must have said, although he didn’t realise he had spoken. “I can’t… I can’t kill him now, but when he is capable of defending himself, I’ll take revenge for all the fae he’s killed.”
Baur nodded. “I know. I won’t tell anyone. Just… make sure you kill him, Lilia.”
“I will.”
☆☆☆
Aurora was floating through an endless white space, weightless body feeling more peaceful than he had in years. Is this what death felt like?
slowly, colors started invading his tranquil white, fuzzing him back into reality.
He sat up. His entire body was in pain.
He was in a room he did not recognise, surrounded by dark stone walls and cluttered belongings of… someone.
strange. He was sure he had died.
he had been ready to. He’d known Henrick was wrong, and had still obeyed his orders and killed the dragon princess. And she was about to be a mother, too… Aurora would understand if the gods never forgave him.
he would never forgive himself.
“awake, huh?” a tired voice cut through the silence. Aurora turned to see a short fae with long black hair, streaks of red running through it, and armor from the Briarland royal guard. He was leaning on a large green magearm.
Aurora went stiff. “the General Vanrouge…”
“Yes. Vanrouge.” the fae replied coldly. “the man whose homeland and life you destroyed. The man who’s going to kill you.”
Aurora lowered his head. “I… I’ve already made peace with my death. I welcome the justice you choose to bring upon me. I deserve it.”
Vanrouge’s face remained impassive. “you do. But I’m not a man who kills those who can’t defend themselves. You’ll heal up first, and we’ll have a duel. And I’ll kill you, fairly.”
Aurora did not expect the General to be so merciful, and he was grateful for the chance to fight fairly, even if he wasn’t going to win and he knew it.
he didn’t want to.
“thank you,” he whispered.
“don’t.” Vanrouge stood up and left his magearm leaning on the wall, a silent threat. “This isn’t mercy. It’s vengeance.”
☆☆☆
a day passed. and another, and another. Aurora remained in what he assumed was the General’s bed, since he saw no other one in the room. He remained in pain, he remained under the watchful gaze of the General, and, surprisingly, under his care.
The soup he made as a “natural cure for pain” was a black, half solid concoction that smelled like a corpse and tasted worse, but the General had made it personally for Aurora.
The clothes he wore were torn, old and used, but kept him warm, and were the General’s own (which did mean the pants were too short and the sleeves had to be cut off the shirts as Aurora was much taller and more muscular than the General).
The bandages the General wrapped around his injuries were ripped, dirty, and probably extremely unhelpful, but the General had applied them himself. Every day.
“why… Why take care of me?” Aurora asked one day, as the General presented him with fresh bandages. “Why not just leave me to die? wouldn’t that be revenge enough?”
the General stopped, fingers rubbing softly against Aurora’s old bandages, which he was in the process of changing.
“I…” his red gaze fell on Aurora’s own purple one. “I want to fight you. I want to kill you myself.”
Aurora could see his eyes reflect something more, something the General didn’t say.
“I understand, but… why nurse me back to health with such care? you could easily leave me to heal on my own,”
the General’s gaze hardened, and he quickly and roughly finished changing the bandages and left, not speaking another word.
Another day, while the General was preparing food, Aurora slowly pulled himself to a sitting position.
“I apologise for asking once again, but I really must know,” he said. “Why do you care for me so, General?”
"Don't call me that,” the General’s voice was as cold as ice. “Because of you, I am no longer General,”
Aurora fidgeted with the edge of his shirt. “what… Why did you lose the title?”
Aurora received no answer.
“Then, what should I call you?” he asked, letting the subject drop.
“It would be ideal if you did not address me at all, but if you must… I suppose ‘Vanrouge’ is fine,”
“Understood.” Only then did Aurora realise Vanrouge had successfully distracted him from his original question.
One day, a friend of Vanrouge’s visited. A tall, green haired man with scales on his face and arms.
coincidentally, he arrived on the exact day Vanrogue went out for supplies.
he and Aurora were left staring uncomfortably at each other.
Aurora cleared his throat. “ummm… please don’t kill me, Vanrouge wants to do it himself?”
“I know,” the visitor said, avoiding Aurora’s gaze. “where is he?”
“out… for supplies,” Aurora replied awkwardly. “I don’t know where.”
“I see.” the stranger turned to leave, and at that exact moment, Vanrouge walked through the door.
“Baur!” he exclaimed, looking happier and more relieved than Aurora had ever seen him. “What are you doing here?”
“visiting,” the stranger— Baur— replied. He jabbed a thumb at Aurora. “I didn’t know he was still here,”
Aurora suddenly felt very small, being stared down by two extremely powerful fae.
Vanrouge sighed. “I can’t fight him yet. He won’t last a minute. His death should not be a fast one,”
Baur gave Vanrouge a look, but said nothing, and the two stepped outside, out of Aurora’s earshot.
☆☆☆
“What are you doing, Lilia?” Baur hissed as soon as they were outside. “he’s fine, he can fight, just kill him already! If anyone finds out he's here…”
“Baur, he can't even stand,” Lilia crossed his arms. “I can't seriously duel him like that,”
“someone's going to find you,”
“No one is going to find us. No one is going to come look for me. You know how much the senate hates me…” Lilia sighed, looking back at his cave. “besides, you've seen him. He can't fight me, he’ll die in two seconds and that's no revenge,”
Baur fixed Lilia with a strange look. “if I hadn't known better, I’d think you didnt actually want to kill him,” he observed.
Lilia didn't even dignify that with an answer. Of course he hated the man and wanted him dead. He was just… waiting. For the right time.
☆☆☆
The days after, Baur showed up often, helping Vanrouge with cooking, which resulted in better food for Aurora. But only sometimes, since Baur wasn’t too keen on giving him any.
It was clear Baur hated Aurora. and Aurora couldn’t fault him. He did, after all, kill his princess and assist Henrick in taking over a large portion of Briarland.
But next to Baur, who made his hatred obvious, Vanrouge’s caring attitude shone.
Vanrouge was by no means gentle. He rarely spoke, his eyes never met Aurora’s, and he handled changing Aurora’s bandages quite roughly. But sometimes, when he thought Aurora was asleep, Aurora would notice his gaze on him, staring not with anger but rather with soft melancholy.
Sometimes, he tried different recipes, being considerate of Aurora’s human stomach. They were always disasters, but the gesture was there.
He always had clean bandages now, making sure to restock when they were running low.
and sometimes, when he was sure Aurora wasn’t looking, he would smile sadly and hum a sweet melody.
☆☆☆
Lilia didn’t know what he was doing.
taking care of this man? this monster who had ruined so many lives in such a brutal war? What was he thinking?
but the man’s words when Lilia found him wouldn't stop echoing through his mind.
stay safe. keep our baby safe.
this wasn’t a monster. This was a man with a family, a family who probably was mourning his death at this very moment.
this… was a human. and humans, Lilia had come to realise (with great difficulty), were just like fae.
They had goals, feelings, loves, hates.
Really, what made Lilia different from this Knight?
Lilia himself had probably separated and ruined many families during his time as General. And he wasn't a monster?
there was no difference. And if the Knight wasn't a monster, Lilia must not be one as well.
And the Knight was no monster.
Lilia could see it in his eyes, in his soft voice, in his gentle mannerisms and kind speech.
He saw it in the man’s desire for death, for punishment for his sins.
and yet… Lilia couldn’t accept it.
this man. This man had taken Maleanor and Raverne from him. This man was almost single-handedly responsible for Briarland’s decay.
Lilia didn’t know what he was doing. He didn’t know what he was feeling. And who could he talk to? Any fae would turn him in for harboring such a dangerous enemy.
Baur hated the man, with good reason, and would not understand Lilia’s complicated thoughts. Or wouldn't want to. It was easier to hate, after all.
☆☆☆
A few months passed. Aurora was capable of changing his own bandages, standing up and even walking, although he was a bit wobbly.
One day, Vanrouge decided Aurora was fit enough to not be a freeloader anymore.
“you,” he said, holding out an axe. “take this. We're going to get wood.”
Aurora carefully tested the axe’s weight. He could lift it fine, but he was sure to get exhausted after much physical work.
“let’s go,” Vanrouge muttered, leaving the room. Aurora cautiously followed, blinking in the fading sunlight.
This was the first time Aurora had been outside Vanrouge's home, which he now found was a small, one room cave on the side of a mountain.
An old, well worn path ran along the mountain, giving Vanrouge and Aurora easy access to the forests below. The setting sun cast golden shadows on the trees below, framing the forest in a soft glow.
Vanrouge led Aurora down the mountain to a clearing in the forest and wordlessly began cutting down a tree. Aurora understood the message and found his own tree to chop, close enough to Vanrouge not to get lost, and far enough not to be a bother.
☆☆☆
Lilia struck his tree as if it was… well, the Dawn Knight, venting all his anger of the last few months on the poor plant.
Why did he have to take the Knight in?
Why couldn't he just kill him back then, or leave him to rot?
Why does he care?
Why does he care about the man who killed his love? Both of his loves?
Lilia’s strike froze when he heard a cry behind him. He turned, expecting the Knight’s still-weakened body to have failed him, but what he saw was much worse.
The Knight was being dragged away by a large direbeast with vine-like tentacles, his axe buried in the tree he had been chopping.
Lilia’s words caught in his throat as he realised he didn't know what to yell. He settled for, “Knight!” as he started running toward the beast, swinging his axe.
“This is only because I’m the one to kill him!” he yelled. Not because… “No! Not any other reason!”
Lilia leaped at the beast, cutting off the tentacles grappling the Knight with one smooth motion. He then threw his axe at the beast’s head, hitting it with a sickening squelch.
Behind him, the knight stood up, supporting himself with a tree. “I… thank you…”
Lilia didn't look at him. “like I said. This is only because I will be the one to kill you,”
“of course. But you still saved me. That deserves a thanks, doesn't it?”
Did it?
Lilia couldn’t remember the last time someone had thanked him. The senate certainly hadn't, even after he’d almost sacrificed his life to save Malleus.
…oh. It had been Maleanor. Right after she entrusted Malleus to him, right before…
Right before the man behind him had killed her.
The Knight tried to walk over to his axe and stumbled to the ground, his legs shaking.
“We're done here for today, aren't we?” Lilia sighed, hauling the knight’s arm over his shoulder and helping the man walk. “Well, all right. Let's go back, Knight.”
“Aurora,” the knight said.
“what?”
“...my name. It's Aurora.”
Lilia scowled at the lurch his heart gave. He should not be so excited to learn the name of his rival. But despite his anger, he heard himself say, “mine’s Lilia. Lilia Vanrouge.”
☆☆☆
Lilia was an early riser. Aurora was not. Or at least, Lilia thought he wasn't.
In reality, Aurora woke up just as early as Lilia, and savored the moments Lilia thought he was asleep. Those moments where Lilia allowed himself to relax, to smile, to think.
One such morning, Aurora was woken up earlier than usual by quiet sobbing.
Lilia was… crying?
Aurora did his best not to listen, he didn't want to intrude in Lilia’s private moments. But he wasn't stupid, and he was close enough to hear most of what was being said.
Lilia was grieving the loss of the fae princess Aurora had killed.
Lilia was crying because of him.
So Aurora decided to do something nice for Lilia. Not that it would make up for anything, but perhaps it could lighten the mood a bit?
It was stupid. But Aurora wanted to do it anyway.
So the next night, he stayed up gathering ingredients from Lilia's storage and the forest outside, and spent half a night cooking.
He made his best meal, the meal he always made for Leah at the early stages of her pregnancy.
Leah… he wondered how she was doing now. Was she safe? Was the baby alright? …will he ever see her again?
He shook the thought away. He'd already made peace with his death. He was basically already dead. There was no point in worrying about Leah, Lilia would surely kill him soon and he'll never see her again.
He silently wiped a tear from his cheek and kept cooking.
Lilia woke up to a pleasant smell from the corner of his cave that was the kitchen.
He yawned, stretched, and immediately froze when he noticed Aurora in the kitchen, bent over a cooking fire.
“...what is this?” he asked.
Aurora stood up. “I wanted to do something for you. Not that it would do anything, considering… What I did… but I was hoping to express my thanks for your care,”
Lilia stared at Aurora. Then at the pot over the fire. Then back at Aurora.
“you didn't poison this, did you?”
Aurora paled. “oh no, I didn't even think about how suspicious this would look! I swear, it's not poisoned! I'll prove it, I'll eat some!”
Lilia chuckled. “it's fine. I believe you. Besides, it's not like anything you can cook would kill me, considering what I cook,”
Aurora laughed.
Lilia took the pot and ate, with Aurora sitting beside him, watching. Lilia was eating with a small smile. Aurora realised how rarely he'd seen Lilia smile, and how he loved it. After all, hadn't he made this entire meal just in an attempt to cheer Lilia up?
…no, those are dangerous thoughts. Lilia was going to kill him soon. It wouldn't do any good to start caring for him.
☆☆☆
“I can't keep doing this,” Lilia whispered, gaze locked on the Knight’s— on Aurora’s— sleeping form. “I can't keep… caring like this. He killed so many fae… he killed Maleanor, Raverne… I have to kill him,”
Lilia reached for his magearm, but something stopped him before he could swing it down. “It's because he still can't fight,” he told himself.
But he knew it wasn't true.
He knew he was starting to truly care.
He knew he wasn't going to be able to kill Aurora.