Kiwiko0
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{Apple Blossoms, Spoiled Orchards} by Pixeltwix
Fandoms: Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon), Helluva Boss (Web Series)
29 Jun 2024
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After centuries of asking and pleading and begging and just being generally insufferable about it, God has finally agreed to let Adam take another wife. Only on one condition- he has to actually try this time. Easier said than done.Unlike Lilith and Eve who were simply given to him he is instead tasked to win his next match over this go round rather than hearing immediate wedding bells. Given a maximum of one year to successfully woo and propose the time crunch becomes an active stressor as Adam is forced to be more than just a tool bag who gets what he wants.
But this match hardly seems correct. She seems to possess all of the negative qualities he found in his first two wives, and then some. If this was some sort of test he supposed God never did tire of his horrible jokes. If only his creator wasn’t the only one laughing.
-Bookmarked by Kiwiko0
12 Jul 2024
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Adam was used to many things, the thrill of killing sinners, the inferno of pleasure between a woman's thighs, but rejection? Yeah, no. Practically divorced twice, if there was one thing Adam hated more than sinners, it would have to be rejection. After a brush with it at a party, Adam swore to himself that he'd make her fall for him, no matter what.
Bookmarked by Kiwiko0
13 May 2024
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You're an average young woman, just trying to live your life. After almost meeting your untimely demise one night, you're saved by a foul-mouthed divine being who claims to be your Guardian Angel, AND the first man.
That's nice and all... Until you realize that this asshole doesn't. Stop. Talking. And he's a dick. And he thinks he can do whatever he wants.
OR; Adam is your Guardian Angel who swoops in to save you when you need it, and also pesters you whenever he feels like it. This arrangement is fun for neither of you.
May just end up being a two-shot. TBD, will depend on comment activity!
Bookmarked by Kiwiko0
12 May 2024
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______, an angel hailing from gods fingertips, finds herself at the center of a certain asshole's affection upon enlisting in the exorcist militia. The next few decades are filled with shitty jokes, epic guitar solos, and the first man throwing out anything he can to earn her love. Unfortunately, she seems unbothered by the absurdities of his plans.
Bookmarked by Kiwiko0
11 May 2024
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In the heavenly realm, one newcomer (you) learns the hard way about the quirks of paradise. From dodgy smoothies to impromptu serenades, they're quickly schooled in the art of survival. But when a mysterious ticket starts playing tricks, they're in for a wild ride. Join them as they navigate heaven's chaos, one divine hiccup at a time. Welcome to paradise, where even angels have their hands full!
Bookmarked by Kiwiko0
08 May 2024