LastPositivist
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Recent works
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Lord of War by LastPositivist
Fandoms: Warhammer 40.000, Warhammer 40k (Novels) - Various Authors
19 May 2026
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Summary
In the grim darkness of the far future there is only war. And quite right too, say the pious Khornites of the Sanguinary Utnapishtim, the small Empire in which our tales take place. In order to perpetuate this blesséd state of affairs, and see that war involves maximally - and they mean maximally - many skulls taken, they engage in various shenanigans and misadventures. Today we explore that ever complex matter of Astartes-mortal relationships.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,145
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 2
- Hits:
- 23
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Peace - An Audit (Excerpts) by LastPositivist
Fandoms: Warhammer 40.000, Warhammer 40k (Novels) - Various Authors
03 May 2026
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Summary
In the grim darkness of the far future there is only war. And quite right too, say the pious Khornites of the Sanguinary Utnapishtim, the small Empire in which our tales take place. In order to perpetuate this blesséd state of affairs, and see that war involves maximally - and they mean maximally - many skulls taken, they have created the Office for Ceremonial Calculation. In this series of shorts we follow their misadventures, as this vast bureaucracy of pious Khorne worshipers works hard to ensure we get effective misanthropy, and that the Sanguinary Utnapishtim truly produces the greatest rage for the greatest number.
In today's misadventure, a logistician performs an audit on a cultural intervention. How do you measure the value of a song? In the lives it ruins, the fights it starts? Or just the hate it inspires in all of us? Art is such a beautiful complex thing!
Series
- Part 29 of The Office for Ceremonial Calculations
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 494
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 2
- Hits:
- 22
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By the Book by LastPositivist
Fandoms: Warhammer 40.000, Warhammer 40k (Novels) - Various Authors
04 Apr 2026
Tags
Summary
In the grim darkness of the far future there is only war. And quite right too, say the pious Khornites of the Sanguinary Utnapishtim, the small Empire in which our tales take place. In order to perpetuate this blesséd state of affairs, and see that war involves maximally - and they mean maximally - many skulls taken, they have created the Office for Ceremonial Calculation. In this series of shorts we follow their misadventures, as this vast bureaucracy of pious Khorne worshipers works hard to ensure we get effective misanthropy, and that the Sanguinary Utnapishtim truly produces the greatest rage for the greatest number.
In today's misadventure, we check in with the thin red line between murder (licensed, good) and murder (unlicensed, bad). How can the inspectors walking that line keep themselves brutal when the job demands pleasant professionalism from them?
Series
- Part 28 of The Office for Ceremonial Calculations
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 499
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 5
- Hits:
- 102
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A Good Offence by LastPositivist
Fandoms: Warhammer 40.000, Warhammer, Warhammer 40k (Novels) - Various Authors
04 Jan 2026
Tags
Summary
In the grim darkness of the far future there is only war. And quite right too, say the pious Khornites of the Sanguinary Utnapishtim, the small Empire in which our tales take place. In order to perpetuate this blesséd state of affairs, and see that war involves maximally - and they mean maximally - many skulls taken, they have created the Office for Ceremonial Calculation. In this series of shorts we follow their misadventures, as this vast bureaucracy of pious Khorne worshippers works hard to ensure we get effective misanthropy, and that the Sanguinary Utnapishtim truly produces the greatest rage for the greatest number.
In today's misadventure, we learn about the hard working academicians whose work Office logisticians build upon. How exactly do we rigorously verify that their research has met proper scholarly standards? By what measure or proof do we tes - it's murder. Obviously it's murder.
Series
- Part 27 of The Office for Ceremonial Calculations
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 500
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 4
- Hits:
- 85
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The Device by LastPositivist
Fandoms: Warhammer 40.000, Warhammer 40k (Novels) - Various Authors
16 Dec 2025
Tags
Summary
In the grim darkness of the far future there is only war. And quite right too, say the pious Khornites of the Sanguinary Utnapishtim, the small Empire in which our tales take place. In order to perpetuate this blesséd state of affairs, and see that war involves maximally - and they mean maximally - many skulls taken, they engage in various shenanigans and misadventures. Today we follow one such, as they attempt to weaponise a McGuffin that ruins your life if you have social anxiety.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,592
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 10
Recent series
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The Office for Ceremonial Calculations by LastPositivist
Fandom Warhammer, Warhammer 40.000, Warhammer 40k (Novels) - Various Authors
03 May 2026
- Words:
- 14,433
- Works:
- 29
- Bookmarks:
- 4