RestlessMiind
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"See? You’re even handsome all drenched! Like a juicy steak in vinaigrette — much tastier that way!"
or
The clumsy office intern had a unique talent for driving the grumpy IT guy crazy. And that time was no exception. Lucky for him, he was absurdly adorable.
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“It's better swallow it all this time,” he ordered sensually as he grabbed the blonde’s golden locks between his fingers, bringing his red, swollen lips closer.
Even after being married, some habits never change.
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Brazil. 18th Century. A victorious battle brought an exotic slave as a reward.
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“So let me get this straight,” Nami says, her voice not even slightly slurred despite the insane amount of alcohol they’ve consumed tonight. “Your sister, as she does every few months, tried to set you up on a date with some random dude.”
“Yep.”
“And instead of saying no to this like you usually do, you accidentally told her you were seeing someone.”
“Right.”
“To which she suggested you bring this non-existent someone to a small family get-together at the home of your weirdo vampire dad.”
“Uh huh.”
“But rather than coming up with an excuse for why that wasn’t an option, you doubled down on the whole fabricated mess and agreed, not only to go, but to bring your aforementioned imaginary boyfriend with you.”
“Mhm.”
“Wow,” she says, staring into the contents of her glass like they might somehow contain the secrets of the universe. “You’re an absolute idiot.”
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Bookmarked by RestlessMiind
24 Jan 2026
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So that’s how it starts, but it is not, unfortunately, how it ends. Mainly because it doesn’t end, that is. It keeps happening, often multiple times a week, and before he knows it Sanji’s been letting a piece of potentially sentient plant life into his pants for going on two months. He can only assume it’s a result of taking one too many hits to the head.
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Bookmarked by RestlessMiind
23 Jan 2026
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This was about a million times better than jerking off over Zoro had ever felt. Hell, just this simple grinding and kissing rivalled the actual sex he’d had with any women. There was something about it that clicked into place when he kissed Zoro, something warm and comfortable and fluttery.
Must have been their close friendship.
(or sanji’s obviously straight, of course he is, so why does everyone keep thinking he and zoro are dating?)
Bookmarked by RestlessMiind
23 Jan 2026
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“Hey, Zoro, I don’t think I’ve ever asked before – do your earrings mean anything?”
Zoro rolled his eyes and turned back to his food, shrugging. “No real meaning to ‘em. Just exactly what you see: three swords. Thought it looked cool.”
“What about the other one?”
Zoro just grabbed a fork full of rice. “Wedding band.”
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Or, the one in which the strawhats find out that somehow, at some point, RORONOA ZORO, local grump and all around non-romantic, is literally MARRIED
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Bookmarked by RestlessMiind
22 Jan 2026
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Sanji chokes on his cigarette. “You’re saying I’m allergic to what?”
“Semen,” Chopper says in the same tone of voice he’d use to describe today’s laundry list as if Sanji’s entire existence isn’t crashing down right in front of his eyes. “Zoro’s semen, to be precise.”
Bookmarked by RestlessMiind
22 Jan 2026