asphyxime
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Love's a Battlefield (and the Navy Did Not Train Steve for This Shit) by cyerus
Fandoms: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
30 Jul 2013
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Summary
The Kalakaua-Kelly clan are determined to matchmake Steve. Out of desperation, Steve makes up a boyfriend named Danny.
It doesn't quite go according to plan.
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Saying Stiles was weird was like saying space was big. It didn't nearly do it justice. But he was the sort of weird that knew Danny could be bought. So what if his excuses were terrible, his hands were warm and his mouth literally begging to be shut up? Danny can deal. Right?
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In which brainy freshman Stiles Stilinski wants star quarterback Derek Hale to join the math team, AKA math nerds in love.
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“Derek showed him a strange cloth bag he had brought with him. He placed Mar-rhûhn carefully inside the opening and when he hefted the whole thing onto his back it clicked: This was a saddle made for cats to comfortably ride around on their servants! What a marvelous invention!”
In which Derek gets a cat. Or the cat gets Derek, depending on who you ask.
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In which Stiles ships Derek/nice things almost as hard as I do
Or
Stiles definitely starts off thinking it’s fucking hilarious that Derek-sourwolf-Hale does crosswords and cares about scuffs on his furniture.
But at a certain point, and he can’t pinpoint exactly when, “fully functional adult couple” somehow becomes a massive fetish of his. Derek in sweats and bare feet, nudging his glasses up his nose while he does the Sunday crossword? Unff. Derek filling out forms to get some renovations on his property approved? Oh God, yes. Derek putting away groceries and bitching that the corner store was out of the right type of Greek yogurt? Take me now, Stiles thinks, worrying at his lower lip with his teeth.
This can’t be normal.
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- English
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Bookmarked by asphyxime
25 Jul 2015