haygahr
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Recent works
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Of course it's a mistake, but that doesn't make Cujo's judgment any easier to bear.
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Too Many Dicks, Not Enough Richards by haygahr for NaoNazo
Fandoms: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
16 May 2020
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Roy grabbed the phone and turned the brightness down, and then back up, and held it away from himself until his eyes would focus. He turned to Ed. “That’s an anus.”
Series
- Part 1 of OPERATION: WASP TRAP
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While Gen sails Attolia out of the harbor at Ephrata, a storm blows them out to sea.
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Five Times Voldemort Saw His Soulmate (Through Another’s Eyes) by haygahr, NaoNazo
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
21 Mar 2020
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Whoops we forgot to make a summary!
Nothing can prepare you for this.
*author peaces out in a puff of smoke*
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holding out for a... horse by haygahr
Fandoms: Tortall - Tamora Pierce, PIERCE Tamora - Works, The Song of the Lioness - Tamora Pierce, The Immortals - Tamora Pierce
05 Feb 2019
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Alanna--
The more time I spend here the more certain I am that your seneschal's friend might have been a little deep in his cups when he saw this "demon wolf." For a start, the locals (who, to be clear, barely speak Common. Or, well, they certainly speak something but I am not entirely certain it's Common. It's certainly common, though.) can't seem really to decide if it's a) a bear b) a giant wolf or c) some kind of strange horse creature? There is a girl here who heard it from her cousin, or perhaps her brother, or both, but he says that his friend who is what passes for an apothecary here saw it in the night stealing medicine and swears up and down that it had human hands like a small girl. This has not given me much hope for finding anything other than more saddle sores and ticks.
My only consolation is knowing you're more displeased in your court dresses and setting about wedding preparations than I am here, on this lumpy, flea-ridden bed, wondering if the horse you loaned me is somehow deficient, as he seemed somehow more bone-rattling than the general run of such beasts.
Hell and damnation on you and yours.
All my love,
Numair Salmalín
Recent series
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- Words:
- 3,779
- Works:
- 1
- Bookmarks:
- 1
Recent bookmarks
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"Perhaps we'll make an aficionado of you yet."
Bookmarked by haygahr
02 May 2026
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"A few instances of mutual life-saving does not a relationship make."
Bookmarked by haygahr
02 May 2026
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Shandry's Third @shaneybaby
uhhh so im on r/shanehollander rn and some guy is claiming to have cloned shane’s dad’s phone and uploaded it to the internet?? has anyone else clicked on this link will it give me a virus if i do
7:03 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 135.1k retweets | 232.1k likes
Shandry's Third @shaneybaby
okay I googled his dad and he’s a 52 year old forensic accountant who thinks fashion peaked with ralph lauren polo shirts. am I enough of a hollander simp to risk my laptop just to look through the phone of his dad who acts like sandals and bermuda shorts are a risqué choice. yes.
7:04 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 137.1k retweets | 235.9k likes
Shandry's Third @shaneybaby
oh my god his password for everything is ShaneHollander24. pov you love your son so much that it compromises your bank account
7:04 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 143.7k retweets | 250.7k likes
Shandry's Third @shaneybaby
HOLY FUCK
7:19 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 337.1k retweets | 413.3k likes
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Keptin Canada by hoosierbitch
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
27 Apr 2026
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“...you don't think they want you to captain Team Canada?"
Shane was wearing a nervous little smile, like he thought maybe everyone’s confusion was a prank, like he hadn’t handed the reporters a solid gold brick when they’d expected two cents.
“Well. If the C goes to one of us, of course Ilya will be captain.”
There was a moment of silence before half the cameras turned towards Ilya and the sound of shutters struck like a tsunami.
Ilya Rozanov, not just in a red Canada jersey, but with a “C” on the front—?
The MLH, the media, and apparently the entirety of Canada reacted Very Normally to this.
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all my perversions by probablylily for connorstorriethinker
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
20 Mar 2026
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Summary
He watches the tape again over dinner. Listens to Rozanov moan inside a girl's pussy while he eats. By the time he finishes his last bite, Rozanov's inside her, her nails raking down his back, her mouth twisted open in pleasure, and Shane's hard in his pants.
So, Shane puts his plate in the sink and goes back to his room. Starts the video over.
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A sex tape of Ilya with a girl leaks. Shane reacts normally.
Series
- Part 1 of all my perversions