Chapter Text
”Bilbo wait!" The voice was familiar, but not the one Bilbo wanted to hear. He thought about continuing on but then remembered who he was. He was a hobbit, a kind and unassuming soul.
"Yes Ori?" He asked, his voice low and tired. Ori wrapped a hand around Bilbo's arm and squeezed.
"They will live." Ori told him, his voice soft and nearly non existent. Bilbo started, then stared at Ori.
"They will? Thank you. But, Ori I still have to go." Bilbo tried to pull his arm away. Ori's grip strengthened and he glared at the hobbit.
"No, you don't. Thorin will see reason, lad." Dwalin joined them, a limp in his step. Bilbo half turned and gaped at him. Bofur joined their little group, Nori right behind him. The older Ri brother crossed his arms and glared.
"How can you know that?" Bilbo spat, his eyes suddenly wild.
"He cares for you. Anyone can see it." Nori informed him. Bilbo laughed, a wild pain filled sound.
"Except perhaps, for him. No I must go. I have a home waiting for me back in the Shire. A home no one can send me away from." Bilbo shrugged off Ori's hand and turned to go.
"Please Bilbo. If not for Thorin, then what about Fili and Kili? They adore you!" Ori pleaded.
"Why should Bilbo stay? Thorin has done nothing but hurt him!" Bofur suddenly snarled, his face dark. Bilbo gave his friend a small, pained smile. He waved a hand at Dwalin, who looked ready to hit Bofur.
"Aye, he is dense. But he is still our King." Dwalin grumbled, his arms crossed.
"You cannot tell them." Bilbo said after a moment's thought. Something in his tone made the four dwarves around him straighten.
"Tell them what?" Ori whispered, his eyes a light with excitement.
"I plan to come back, in a few years. There are some things I wish to reclaim from my home, and I need to leave it to someone." Bilbo informed then. Ori vibrated, a big grin on his face. "One of my cousins married a few years before the quest, and he and his wife have a babe. It is past time that Bag End had the sounds of a child's laughter through the halls."
"But you will come back, Laddie?" Dwalin asked. Bilbo smiled at the gruff dwarf.
"I will. Don't tell them, please. But I promise I will." Bilbo nodded to them and then shook each dwarf's hand in turn. "I need to be going. I wish you all the best, until we meet again."
"Thank you, Bilbo." Ori lunged forward and gave Bilbo a tearful hug. Bilbo patted his back, and nodded to Nori over Ori's shoulder. He gently pulled out of Ori's arms and smiled at the young dwarf.
"Come here, you." Bofur grabbed Bilbo, and pulled him into a quick squeeze. Bilbo returned it, then stepped away and started back down the hall. He didn't make it far, when he heard the quiet thunder of boots.
"Bilbo, I just wanted to say. I- thank you. For caring for that stubborn idiot." Dwalin's voice was low and filled with emotion.
"You aren't the only one who cares for him." Bilbo replied simply. He gave Dwalin a quick hug, startling the battle hardened dwarf. Dwalin returned the brief embrace, then pushed Bilbo away.
"Well, you better get going. You have a long road ahead of you." Dwalin told Bilbo gruffly. Bilbo chuckled, and pretended not to see the spots of faint colour on Dwalin's cheeks.
"Did he really leave?" Ori asked, his voice breaking. Dwalin met the younger dwarf's eyes, and nodded.
"He did. But, he will come back." Dwalin told him. He rested his hand briefly on Ori's shoulder.
"What if he lied?" Nori groused, a sour look on his face.
"When has our hobbit ever lied to us? No, Bilbo will return. Until then, we shall keep his wish and not tell the others." Bofur shrugged his shoulders, and adjusted his hat on his head. "Should we go see how our king is faring?"
~~~
"Bilbo. Where is Bilbo?" Thorin croaked. He tried to move his arm, only to cry out in pain. He let his shoulder rest, and cracked his swollen eyes open.
"Ah, theres the stubborn bugger I know." Dwalin's voice rumbled through the small tent. Thorin tried to chuckle, only stopped when the pain made him wince.
"Good to know you survived. How are my sister-sons? Bilbo?" Thorin tried again.
"We are here, Uncle. Alive." Fili called from somewhere to Thorin's left. Thorin tried not to think about what wasn't said. He closed his eyes again, only to open them once more.
"Bilbo. Where is the hobbit?" He asked, panic lacing his voice.
"He returned home, Thorin. You banished him, remember?"
"You just let him leave?" Thorin's voice was weak, broken. Dwalin rested his hand lightly on Thorin's shoulder, mindful of his injuries.
"I could hardly let him stay. You were quite clear about your opinion." Dwalin murmured to him. Thorin could feel his shoulders start to shake, his whole body tremble.
"Uncle! It'll be okay. We will be okay." Kili called from his right.
"We are here, Uncle. We will be there for you." Fili chimed in.
"Aye." Thorin sighed, and tried to calm himself. Dwalin settled himself near his friend.
"Thorin, you need to stay calm. You are severely injured, and rest is the only thing I can do for you now. When you are steady enough, we will take you into the Royal Chambers. A few weeks, at the most I should think. So long as you don't push it too far." Oin gave Thorin a look. He idly pulled at some of Thorin's bandages, making the king wince as he cheeked his injuries.
"Alright Oin. Thank you." Thorin mumbled. Oin scoffed, and Dwalin snorted.
"That as simple. Last time you reacted this calmly to an injury it was because your mother was sitting nearby, ready to twist your ear." Dwalin chuckled to his brother in arms.
"No way!" Kili called, shocked laughter in his voice.
"Grandma used to tweak your ear?" Fili asked, incredulous. Thorin heard creaking, and knew that his nephews were trying to sit up.
"Oi! Sit down you two. You need just as much as rest as your Uncle. If you don't let your wounds heal, then your mother will have my head. I would rather she just get angry at Thorin." Oin snapped at his patients. All three Durin men winced.
"Your mother gets her fierceness from our mother. Dis took her cues from our mother; she raised you much the way we were raised." Thorin replied softly.
"Aye. She was a right terror, she was. Just, though. Very just, she was. Treated all dwarf lads like her own boys, even if they weren't." Dwalin told them just as softly. Thorin raised his hand, and waved it somewhat until he hit Dwalin's arm. When he grabbed it, he squeezed his friend's arm.
"Peace, my friend." Thorin hummed in reply. Dwalin shifted, and coughed into his fist.
"I would like to hear more about our grandmother." Fili offered, into the quiet.
"Perhaps when mother comes home. After all, its that or have her snarl at us for something that wasn't our fault to begin with." Kili pouted. Thorin snorted, and shook his head.
"Can I visit? Please?" Dwalin turned his head, as Ori stormed into the tent. He glared at the warrior dwarf, then nearly fell onto Fili's bed, weeping. Thorin winced, when he heard the sounds. He had known, for some time, that Ori was Fili's One, but he hadn't allowed his nephew to act on it. There had been too much at stake, for his heir to act upon his feelings.
"So, is he really gone?" Thorin asked his friend, while his nephew was preoccupied.
"Yes. I saw him leave myself. Thorin, I am sorry." Dwalin sighed, and looked away from the two young dwarves. He peered over at Kili, who was shifting rather uncomfortably.
"No, its not your fault Dwalin. Nothing you could have done, I am sure. We all know what he was like." Thorin pressed his hand once more against Dwalin's arm, then set it back by his side. "Go, find your One. I am sure he is out there waiting for you."
"Thorin!" Dwalin coughed violently, his cheeks burning.
"If you think I don't know, then you obviously don't know me as well as you should. It's not hard to tell. Peace, friend. Go to him, I have my nephews." Thorin idly waved a rather sheepish Dwalin away. Face still red, Dwalin nodded to Thorin, and slipped from the healers tent.
"That was good of you, Thorin." Thorin nearly jumped, at Oin's words.
"What else could I do? Just because I am miserable, doesn't mean he has needs to be." Thorin replied simply.
"So, it takes getting a knock on your head for you to see reason? If I had known that, I would have had Dwalin give you a bump decades ago." Balin announced his presence softly, so as not to disturb the still sobbing Ori. Thorin rubbed at his eyes, and sighed. He could just hear Fili's calming words, over Ori's distressed sounds.
"I thought Dwalin was the violent one, not you." Thorin grumbled. Balin chuckled, and took Dwalin's place at Thorin's side.
"Well, you always did seem to miss my practice times on the field, so I can see why you might think that." Balin chuckled at his friend. He tapped his pointer finger to his forehead, then that finger to Thorin's rather bruised one. Thorin made a chocked noise in the back of his throat.
"Balin, my friend." Thorin gasped. He tried to say more, but he wasn’t sure he was able.
"There is no need for words. Just rest, my friend. You are safe, your sister sons are alive, and the company escaped with barely an injury."
"Balin, could I have some paper? Its past time I wrote a letter to my sister. She will have my head as it is, what with the injuries my sister sons received." Thorin leaned further into his pillows, an ignored the look Balin gave him. His old advisor, and friend pulled some wrinkled paper from his jacket, followed quickly by a pen.
"Good luck not getting your head cut off when she comes back." Balin gently patted Thorin's shoulder, and left his old friend. Thorin barely noticed, he was so focused on the paper before him.
Dis, my beloved sister
I write this from my bed, in an infirmary tent I share with you darling boys. They truly are wonderful, though I am sure that any amount of time spent without the ability to leave them will be interesting. Dis, I have made some mistakes. And, before you ask I am sure you have already realized that yes, this is my, Thorin son of Thrain's handwriting, and I am actually writing this.
I should never have allowed either of your boys to come on this quest. Nor should I have tried to stop Fili's relationship with Ori. I acted like I didn't see anything, but the pair of them grew much closer over the course of our quest. I wouldn't be surprised if they have already married in secret. If not, well Erebor will be in need of a celebration.
When you come, please stop by the Shire. Dis, this will always be my biggest mistake. I... I never understood the draw of one's One. I saw you find yours, fall in love, and marry. I saw the adoration on both your faces the day Fili was born, and the pain you went through when your One died. I never understood the amount of spine it took, for you to carry on, birth Kili and raise those boys. I should never have told Fili no, before he even told me. Oh, Dis. How I have erred.
I know you have never been to the Shire, and I doubt you know who hobbits are. See, Gandalf recruited a hobbit by the name of Bilbo Baggins to be our burglar. As I am sure you have already imagined, I didn't recognize his worth immediately. I am ashamed to even think of the things I said to him in the first legs of our journey. It took for him to save my life, for me to realize his worth, to realize that he is my One.
There was a battle, Dis. A battle with five armies, and it is a miracle that your boys and myself even survived. In the aftermath, however, Bilbo slipped away. It is him that you should thank, for the lives of your sons. It was him, that saved us all numerous times throughout our journey. He found the Arkenstone, Dis. I fell into the gold madness, and nearly killed him. We had tried, to start something. Dis, I never meant to hurt you, or him, or the boys. I am afraid that I banished him, and I believe he will return to the Shire.
I cannot make Bilbo return to me, as much as I would like. Really, if you could just make sure he lives. Bilbo, he means everything to all of us. You would have loved to see him interact with your boys. He kept up with them, didn't brush them off when they annoyed him. He got along so well with everyone, I am surprised that none of the company has tried to kill me when I was unconscious. Dis, just make sure he is safe, please just do this one thing for me. If it helps, imagine my on my knees, begging. Anything he wants, if it is under your power, just give it to him. Please.
I hope you return soon, I need your steady hand by my side. Your boys need you to keep them in check. We all need you, whether you think it or not. I am not even sure I know how to rule without you by my side. And, before you ask, I just woke up, so I have no idea what injuries your boys have, or what I have. Though, knowing him, Oin has hopefully sent you a letter, explaining everything.
Your thick headed brother, Thorin.
"Uncle?" Kili called softly. Thorin looked up from the letter, and turned his stiff head over to his nephew.
"Aye, Kili?"
"Are you alright?" Kili asked softly, his voice cutting through the silence. It was then that Thorin realized that the only other sounds, were those of the deep breathing of sleep.
“Well, I am breathing. Though, it will take more than a couple of orcs to kill me.” Thorin did his best to sound hearty for the lad. It seemed to work, since Kili chuckled at him.
“Evidently.” Kili replied. Thorin didn’t reply; there wasn’t more to say. Kili dropped off into silence. He was silent for so long, that Thorin thought he had fallen asleep. He nearly jumped out of his skin, when Kili spoke again. “Uncle?”
“Yes nephew?” Thorin asked softly. Emotion was starting to clog him. The knowledge that his sister sons were safe, that his company was alive, that he was still breathing. Well, it was starting to take a toll on him.
“I would have died for you, you know that right?” Kili informed him. Thorin had to steel himself, so he didn’t cough, or shout, or cry.
“I do. And, it is my hope that neither of you will have to die for me. You deserve a life.” Thorin managed to choke out. He heard Kili hum softly.
“And so do you, Uncle. I hope Bilbo comes back.” Kili replied softly. Thorin heard Kili shifted. He knew that was Kili’s way of leaving him be, of giving him time with his own thoughts. Thorin waited until he heard Kili’s breath even. Then, and only then, did he let himself sink into his own misery.