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It's almost three weeks before it starts to dawn on Jared that he may have overlooked a slight flaw in his genius plan.
At first it seems to be working well. Admittedly, Jensen still looks exhausted, with shadows under his eyes that the make-up artists cluck over, but Jared always steps in before things get too bad. Whenever Jensen's eyes grow too dark and haunted and Dean's turns of phrase start shading his speech, Jared slips into Sam's skin and drags Jensen off somewhere to take his mind off things.
It's become more and more of a habit, recently, as Jensen's started channelling Dean in all sorts of odd and amusing ways. Like the way he's started ordering his coffee black, then grimacing when he tastes it, as if he doesn't realise that's what he asked for. Like the way Jensen casually comes looking for Jared if he's been off doing something else. Like the way Jensen runs his hands across the hood of the Impala in an unconscious caress. Jensen usually seems oblivious, but Jared's been developing a real fascination with Dean-spotting, because apart from the way the character bleed's been getting Jensen down, the whole thing is fucking hilarious.
Not to mention really, really hot.
Even so, Jared has been worrying for a while about the toll the whole thing is taking on Jensen. But it wasn't until after Jensen dragged him out of his own angst by becoming Dean for the night - for him - that Jared hit upon his genius plan. Seriously, what better way could there be to make Jensen think like Jensen and not Dean? He's still damn proud of himself for coming up with that one.
So he's kept on working it, ever since that night: dragging Jensen into trailers between scenes for kisses and more, while staying in character himself; watching out for when Jensen gets a bit too quiet and lost-looking, then slipping back into Sam's headspace. He's never been one to turn down an opportunity to fool around with Jensen, and hell, a break from all the unrelenting angst is probably good for Sam, too. The way Jared sees it, it's a win-win-win situation.
Sam really enjoys sucking Jensen's cock, for one thing. Jared finds it interesting to catalogue the differences in the way he goes about it as Sam than as himself. Sam likes to drag it out, drive Jensen batshit insane before he lets him tumble over the edge. Jared can certainly see the attraction, because not many sights come prettier than Jensen on the brink and begging, the way he is right now.
"Oh, god, please - fuck, I can't, I need, I - please, please -"
Sam gets a real kick out of that, and the corner of his mind that is still Jared is certainly enjoying it too. He moans around Jensen's cock, and the way Jensen's head snaps back to thump against the wall of the trailer finally satisfies Sam. He sucks a little harder, moves his hands with more purpose, relenting and allowing Jensen over the edge at last.
"Oh fuck, fuck, Sam, god, please, just - Sam, Sammy -"
It's just as well that Jensen comes right then, as it gives Sam and Jared an excuse for the fact that they both damn near choke.
So yeah, Jared guesses there may have been a slight flaw in his genius plan.
It's not so much what Jensen said - though he's always stuck to 'Sam' until now, knowing Sam's feelings about anyone except Dean calling him 'Sammy'. No, it's the way he said it. Jared's pretty sure that Jensen was so far gone at that moment that he didn't even know what he was saying.
Or maybe that should be: Dean was too far gone.
Jared can't stop thinking about it for the rest of the day. His inner Sam is just as fixated, analysing every sound Jens- Dea- oh, fuck it: every damn sound, trying to figure out where the line was crossed, when the balance tipped. Replaying that begging cry of 'Sammy', again and again.
Maybe it was just a fluke, Jared reasons with himself. There's no reason to start jumping to conclusions based on one word.
His inner Sam agrees, and thinks they should test it out again, just to be sure.
Jared's starting to wonder just what the hell's up with his inner Sam, too.
They still have several scenes to film that day, and for once he's the distracted one. He second-guesses every touch he and Jensen share while the cameras are rolling, worried about what might be reflected in Sam's eyes. It's probably just as well they're shooting the episode they are, when they aren't meant to be close and he has a legitimate reason to flinch away from Dean's touch. He isn't prepared for the way the thinly veiled hurt in Dean's eyes affects him, though - not on the dream-Sam persona he's currently wearing like clothing, but on the real Sam just underneath. It all makes his work even more difficult than usual, and by the time they nail the final scene, Jared feels about ready to collapse.
Jensen looks tired too, his features pinched with exhaustion, and Jared bites his lip as he looks at him. He moves across to stand as close as possible without touching, close enough for Jensen to feel the warmth of his body.
It's only when Jensen turns to meet his gaze, Dean's weariness and heat in his eyes, that Jared realises how Sam-like the gesture was. How much of it was Sam's way of reaching out to Dean, not his own way of reaching out to Jensen.
And the heat in Jensen's - Dean's - eyes is all the confirmation he and Sam need for their suspicions.
Jared doesn't know what the hell to think. His inner Sam has gone oddly quiet now.
"Hey, man," he says, grateful for the ambiguity of the words. "Let's get outta here, okay?"
"Yeah," is the only response, and Jared honestly doesn't know if it's coming from Jensen or Dean.
"Okay," he says, and walks a little faster than normal on his way to the trailers.
By the time he's finished showering, he's mostly over his freak-out. Okay, so his genius plan may have had a flaw or two, but there's no reason to panic. Jensen probably wasn't even aware of the whole Dean thing, anyway. Now Jared knows that his plan isn't pulling Jensen out of character the way he wanted, he'll just have to come up with something else instead.
Jensen still looks exhausted when they meet outside, but he's more clearly Jensen now than before, and Jared's grateful for that. When they get back to Jensen's apartment - closer to set, handier during the week - they tumble straight into bed, because they've got an even earlier call than usual in the morning.
"Everything okay?" Jensen mumbles, curling a little closer, and Jared knows he must have picked up on something after all. Jensen's eyes are tired, a hint of concern in the shadows, but the warmth in them now is all Jensen.
Jared smiles at him and fits their bodies together. "Yeah, everything's fine," he says, and means it.
It's a couple of days later before Jared finally admits to himself that no, everything is not fine. In fact, he's pretty much freaking out after all. Mostly about the fact that his inner Sam isn't.
It's just... he didn't see that one coming. Dean, well - much as Jared loves the guy, he knows Dean's a little twisted in some respects. Jared knows Dean, and though he didn't expect this, now he's seen it he gets it. No, it's Sam's reaction that's blindsided him. The whole time he was putting his plan into action, he never really considered what it meant that Sam was comfortable getting involved with someone who looked exactly like his brother. After all, Jensen is... well, Jensen. Jared's pretty sure anyone with a pulse is attracted to Jensen.
He's wondering about it now, though.
The weird thing is, Sam is his character. He's him, has no life independent of him. How can he be having reactions Jared didn't see coming? Reactions Jared didn't intend for him to have? Seriously, how the hell is that even possible? Jared kind of wants to ask Jensen about it, except, well, no.
He's heard of characters taking on a life of their own before, but this is crazy.
He spends the first few days rationalising the whole thing. It's not Sam being attracted to Dean, he tells himself, it's Sam reflecting Jared's own attraction to Jensen. Or, hell, maybe even his crush on Dean. That makes more sense, surely? Jared almost convinces himself, tells himself to stop freaking out and forget about it.
Forgetting about it doesn't appear to be on Sam's to-do list, however.
Jared's never really been one to suffer from character bleed; that's one of the reasons he's so fascinated by it in Jensen. Jared gets tired at the end of a hard day, sure, but he's never been one to mope about because Sam's depressed. Maybe because Sam does enough moping in-character and gets it out of his system.
So it catches him a bit off-guard to be developing it now.
He may have given up on his genius plan, but whenever he sees Jensen looking depressed, he wants to do something, say something, quite possibly kiss him senseless, to cheer him up and make him smile. And whenever he catches a glimpse of Dean's misery bleeding through, his inner Sam is just as vocal about wanting to do something. Jared's more or less okay with that.
It's just the fact that Sam isn't ruling out the 'kiss him senseless' plan either that's giving him pause.
And Sam keeps sneaking up on him, these days. It's... weird. One minute Jensen's sucking him, and Jared's moaning. The next, Jensen glances up and a possessive heat that is pure Dean flashes in his eyes, and the impact on his inner Sam has Jared coming, hand tangling in his brother's hair - no, not - in - god.
Or Jared'll have his hand shoved down the front of Jensen's jeans, jacking him off hard and fast, and Jensen'll be trying to keep quiet because they're in one of the wardrobe trailers and anyone could walk by and hear, but he's failing, moaning in a way that sparks something in Jared's inner Sam, because it's definitely Sam who slams his hand down across Jensen's mouth.
And he's pretty sure it's Dean who comes half a second later.
Or there's the time they're kissing in one of the trailers during a ten minute break between scenes. He repeats to himself that he's Jared, not Sam, that he's with Jensen, not Dean, despite the fact that he can still see Dean's pain in Jensen's eyes, though it slowly fades as Jensen runs his fingers through Jared's hair and kisses him deeper. His inner Sam relaxes a little too, fiercely intent on making things better, and oh, goddamn, when did Jared lose control of this character thing?
He's not sure when the tipping point was, when this whole thing stopped being weird and wrong and became weird and hot, but it's hard to be in denial about it when Sam is so into it. Jared thinks that maybe it's time for him to come up with a new plan. He just doesn't know what.
Maybe plans just aren't his strong point, Jared admits to himself.
For the next week Jared has no time to think, let alone come up with a new plan: everyone's working flat-out, feeling the strain of still not knowing whether the show's going to be renewed for a third season. They've been stuck working even longer hours than usual, and even Jared can feel himself wilting, while Jensen has been getting paler and more exhausted and character-bleedy. Jared worries about him, but the end of the season is finally almost in sight, just a few weeks away, and he knows there's not much they can do except cling on until then.
Late on Friday afternoon, Jared is startled out of a doze by someone knocking on his trailer door. It takes him a minute to remember exactly where he is. He'd come back to his trailer for a nap while Jensen did a couple of solo scenes - the episode they're shooting is fairly Dean-centric - but it looks like they're ready for him again.
"Yeah," he calls out tiredly. "I'll be there in five."
The door swings open, and Jared is somewhat surprised to see Kim standing there.
"Jensen hasn't spoken to you yet?" Kim asks cryptically. "I guess he's probably passed out in his trailer. Okay, you want the good news or the bad news?"
Jared scrubs at his eyes. He hates that question. "Uh, hit me with the bad."
"We're going to need you and Jensen to work straight through for the next few weeks while we shoot the last two episodes," Kim says unapologetically. "I know you've pretty much only been getting Sundays off for a while, now, but we need to go flat out to do the finale properly."
Jared tries not to groan. "So what's the good news?"
Kim grins. "We're gong to need this weekend to get everything set up. You two are free until Monday morning."
Jared stares at him, then at his watch. Half past four in the afternoon. Friday afternoon. "Seriously? Wow."
"The two of you take off, have some fun - rest up," Kim advises him. "I know we've been running you ragged, and the next couple of weeks are gonna be tough on you both. Catch up on your sleep this weekend: make-up keep on nagging me about the circles under Jensen's eyes."
"We will," Jared promises fervently. Then a thought strikes him. Wow, he really is a genius. "Kim? Could we borrow one of the Impalas for the weekend?"
Yeah, so maybe he's a shitty planner. But he's the goddamn king of improvisation.
Jared is excited enough at the prospect of an actual weekend off that he barely taps on the door of Jensen's trailer before rushing in. "Hey, did Kim tell you -"
He cuts off abruptly at the sight of Jensen sprawled half-on, half-off the bed, the position of someone who'd closed their eyes just for a moment, only to pass out where they sat. Dean's jacket is draped over the chair, and Jensen evidently only got as far as scrubbing off his make-up before passing out - he's still fully dressed, right down to Dean's amulet and boots. Without the make-up, he looks pale and drawn.
Jared stares at him, wondering whether this crazy, spur-of-the-moment idea really is the best course of action. Maybe he ought to just drag Jensen home and force him to sleep for forty-eight hours or so.
Then Jensen stirs restlessly in his sleep, forehead creasing in a faint frown, and mumbles "Sam?" under his breath.
Yes, Jared decides. They're doing this. Or god knows how they're going to survive shooting the final two episodes. He doesn't want to think about Jensen going into that when he's already this raw.
He moves forward and touches Jensen's arm. "Hey," he says quietly. "Hey, Dean, c'mon, wake up."
Jensen stirs and blinks open bleary eyes. "Wha-?"
"C'mon, let's get out of here," Jared says, reaching down. Sam knows exactly how best to grab his brother to lever him to his feet, and they're staggering towards the door before Jensen has managed to open his eyes properly.
The Impala is waiting for them outside where Jared left it. This isn't the first time they've borrowed one: Eric's okay with them taking one of the spare ones for a spin occasionally, provided they stay out of trouble and bring it and themselves back in one piece. This doesn't feel quite like any of those other times, though. Perhaps because, when he's in this mindset, it doesn't really feel borrowed.
Jensen seems to wake up more as Jared pushes him gently in the passenger door. He runs one hand across the leather of the bench, and Jared smiles. Dean. Jensen's still too close to sleep to know exactly who he is at the moment. Which is part of the idea.
Jared closes the passenger door and walks around to slide in the driver's side, then leans across Jensen to bundle Dean's jacket against the window as a makeshift pillow. Jensen blinks at him, scrubbing at his eyes with one hand. "What...?"
"Go back to sleep, Dean," Jared says, letting Sam slip to the surface again, feeling his rush of amused affection at the sight of his brother's sleepy confusion. "Everything's fine. My turn to drive for a while."
Jensen - no, it's more Dean now, responding automatically to his cues - Dean blinks some more, but seems to accept that and relaxes back in his seat.
Sam smiles and turns the key, enjoying the sound of the engine purring to life, and even more the way Dean relaxes further at the sound, eyes fluttering shut.
By the time they've reached the road and he's located a radio station Dean would like, Dean is sound asleep again, slumped against the window, head cushioned on the jacket. Sam relaxes more himself at the sight, and drives, listening to the sound of his brother's even breathing.
They drive for a few hours, the road stretching out before them, like the weekend.
At the moment, with Jensen sound asleep, Jared's in the sort of fluid frame of mind he usually goes into between takes on a really long day of shooting, with he and Sam each taking up about half of his headspace and rubbing along comfortably together. Jared's feeling better than he has in a while, and it's only now that he realises how much the end-of-season pressure has been getting to him, too. He taps along with the radio on the steering wheel, wondering idly if that's a habit he's picked up from Dean.
As the sun sinks lower in the sky, shading the world pink and gold, Jared decides it's time to stop and find a motel. He could afford a fancy hotel, of course, with room service and a view, but that's not them, or at least not who they are right now. What he wants right now is a cheap motel with thin curtains and chipped tiles in the bathroom.
He catches sight of what he's looking for a few minutes later, and pulls into the forecourt of the motel. Jensen stirs as he cuts the engine, but doesn't wake, and Jared decides to get them a room before waking him. He's been sleeping more peacefully in the Impala over the past few hours than he has in months. Besides, the next part could get complicated. If the motel clerk turns out to be a fan of the show...
I should have worn a baseball cap or something.
As it turns out, though, his worries are needless - the kid barely glances up from his TV as he takes Jared's cash and hands him the room key. Jared takes a deep breath and heads back out to the car as quickly as he can.
Jensen is still sleeping when Jared reaches it, but when he opens the driver's door again and slides in, Jensen stirs and opens his eyes. For a moment he tenses, looking around, then relaxes again as he catches sight of Jared. Jared allows himself to enjoy that for a moment, then lets his inner Sam surface.
"C'mon, Dean, we're here," he says. "I got us a room."
Jensen looks around again, still sleep-mussed and not quite with it. Jared feels Sam's grin spreading across his face, and gets back out of the car, slamming the door behind him. Jensen climbs out the other side, stretching his arms above his head and tilting his head from one side to the other to work the kinks out of his neck.
More Sam now than Jared, he watches Jensen, tongue darting out to wet his lips as Jensen's shirt rides up a little, exposing a strip of his back as he stretches. Then Jensen lowers his arms and turns around, reaching out to pat the roof of the Impala absently in a move that is all Dean. The part of his mind that is still Jared decides that Jensen is probably in the same split mindframe, coexisting with his character, that Jared was in during the drive. That's good enough for now.
Jensen/Dean seems to be waking up now, looking around in greater confusion. He turns and leans on the Impala, shooting a confused glance down at it, too. For a moment, Sam wants nothing more than to bend him over the hood - kiss his way down his spine, nipping at each vertebra; press into him, admiring the tan of his skin against the black of the car; watch Dean's palm slap down against the hood for support, head turning from side to side as he moans and pushes back...
For a moment, the image is so strong that Sam is on the point of striding round the car and doing it. After all, the parking lot is deserted apart from the two of them. And it's not like anyone here knows they're brothers.
No, but someone might just recognise us as those two actors from TV, the part of his mind that is still Jared points out, and the thought comes as a jolt.
Okay, so maybe they'd better save it until they're inside. Damn.
Some of what he's feeling must be showing in his eyes, because across the car Jensen freezes, staring at him.
"C'mon," Sam says, and heads for the motel room. He knows if he lets himself look at Jensen for a moment longer, he'll pin him against the car, consequences be damned.
The room is exactly what he was expecting, exactly like all the other motel rooms he and Dean have stayed in over the years - disturbing carpet, weird wallpaper, rickety looking table. It's perfect, and Sam smiles.
He hears footsteps following him in, and smiles wider. He's no idea what he's going to do, but he's always enjoyed improvisation.
"Hey. Jared, what are we -"
Sam turns and kicks the door closed, then slams him up against the wall.
It's more Jensen than Dean right at the moment, which is probably why Sam gets away with that move without having his ass handed to him. Then again, Dean does sometimes let him away with things he'd never stand for from anyone else.
Right now Jensen's eyes are wide and watchful, and his hands close around Sam's biceps, not trying to push him away, just holding on.
"It's Sam," Sam says, grinning at him. "C'mon, Dean. You know better than that." And he leans in and kisses him before Jensen has a chance to fully process it.
Jensen melts into the kiss, then his fingers dig sharply into Sam's biceps, and Sam figures he just caught up with the implications. Jensen pulls back, and now his eyes are narrow as he stares. "Wait. You - you mean -?"
"You've thought about it," Sam says, though they're Jared's words too, and he's speaking for them both. "I know you've thought about it." He pauses, then goes on. "So have I."
He can see the uncertainty written in every line of Jensen's body - Dean's concern for his brother, Jensen's own concern about whether this is really what Jared wants. Jared allows himself to slip out of character for a moment, just long enough to grab one of Jensen's hands and press it to his chest, above his heart, a familiar gesture of reassurance. I'm here.
Jensen's eyes hold his for a long moment, then flutter shut, and Sam and Jared can both feel the ripple that runs through him as Jensen's posture shifts and he falls into character.
It's Dean's eyes that open a moment later, and there's no mistaking the difference.
They stand together, unmoving, while Dean searches Sam's eyes, seeking his own reassurance, communicating the way they do best - in silence. Sam tries to put as much as he can into his gaze - I want this, this is okay, Dean, please - and knows he's succeeded when heat flares in Dean's eyes in response.
And then Dean is kissing him.
It's not like being kissed by Jensen, whether as Sam or as Jared. Hell, it's not even like when Dean was kissing Jared, either, because Sam kisses back like they're sparring, hard and dirty, seeking out weak spots and exploiting them to the full, and even though this is something new, it feels oddly familiar.
They grapple, Dean trying to shove Sam's shirt off his shoulders, while Sam's hands close around his brother's face, tilting Dean's head to the angle he wants. They kiss until Sam is half-dizzy with it, each waiting for the other to break and pull back for air first.
In the end, they both break at the same time, and Sam can feel Dean's breath hot against his jaw as they draw in air, hard and fast.
Dean's hands are working, as fast and confident as ever, to strip off Sam's shirt and t-shirt, and Sam is struck again by the familiarity amidst the new. This isn't the first time Dean has removed his clothes, and it is everything and nothing like every other time.
He follows Dean's unspoken cues, as always, moving his arms to allow his brother to rip off his t-shirt without tearing it (And a good thing, too, the part of him that is still Jared mutters, because I'd be the one who had to explain it to Jeanie in wardrobe). Then he jolts into action himself, making short work of Dean's shirt and t-shirt, especially since Dean responds to his cues just as instinctively. The rest of their clothes are a bit trickier, and he allows Dean to slam him up against the wall while his brother deals with them. The wall is cold against the bare skin of his back, though he can feel the rest of him flushing warm as he watches the fluid, unconscious grace of Dean's movements.
When Dean's hands come to rest on his hips, though, tightening around the top of his shorts, Sam shoves abruptly away from the wall and tugs Dean's head back by his hair, kissing him again. He tries to flip their positions and push his brother up against the wall instead, but Dean resists, and they grapple while kissing, tugging and pushing, trying to catch each other off balance. Dean presses close against him, their legs tangling, then sweeps one leg out, sending them both crashing to the floor.
Sam's breath is knocked out of him as he lands hard on his back, Dean a solid weight on top of him. Before he can recover, Dean has his wrists pinned above his head and is grinning brightly down at him. Sam takes a moment to just look at him, watching the smile slowly fade from Dean's face, to be replaced by a darker heat. Dean's grip on his wrists slowly relaxes, and Sam takes advantage, breaking the hold to reach up and grab Dean's amulet and use it to drag his brother down into another kiss.
Not that much dragging is required: Dean goes willingly, his body melting against Sam's, hips grinding down in a way that makes Sam gasp. Dean seizes the opportunity to take control of the kiss, tongue pressing into Sam's mouth. Sam simply enjoys the kiss for a moment, then pushes his hips up. Dean's moan at the contact is muffled by his mouth, but Sam takes it as his cue to roll them over, fast and hard, so that now he's lying on top of Dean.
Dean breaks the kiss to give him a half-hearted glare, but the thing is, they know each other too well. Sam knows that Dean knew that move was coming, and Dean let him get away with it. And Sam knows why, too. No matter that Sam's the taller - Dean is his big brother, and Sam knows just how deep his protective streak runs, as endearing as it is exasperating. This is one struggle Dean will refuse to win. At least this time.
Sam's not above taking advantage of that, though. The image of Dean bent over the Impala refuses to leave his mind, and if he can't have that, he damn well will have this.
He kisses the glare right off Dean's face, allows his hands to map out the contours of skin at once familiar and unknown, grinds down against Dean until they're both flushed and breathless. Finally, he pulls back and murmurs, "Turn over for me, Dean."
His brother's eyes are dark, and for a moment Sam thinks he might protest, but then Dean's shifting, his body pressing hard against Sam's as he does so, since Sam hasn't bothered to pull back.
Sam just stares for a long moment. Spread out beneath him, Dean's skin looks pale against the brown and violent yellow of the motel carpet. Too pale, and Sam presses his mouth against it, sucking hard against the ridge of Dean's shoulder blades until the skin is purple. Then he moves on, sucking and nipping, leaving marks that trail all over Dean's skin. The part of him that is Jared exults in it, in having enough time free from filming to be able to get away with leaving marks behind; Sam likes it too, fiercely, seeing his marks all over his brother's body, spelling out his claim beyond dispute.
"Sam." It's not quite a moan, but Dean's voice is ragged. "Would you just - Jesus - get on with it?"
"In a rush?" Sam enquires, lips brushing against Dean's skin, before pulling back far enough to admire his handiwork. "Getting old, Dean?" He moves up, fitting their bodies close together, grinning when Dean arches into him. He lowers his head and presses his mouth to the hard line of the leather cord of Dean's amulet, lapping at it, then begins tracing his way down the ridges of his brother's spine, lower and lower.
"You little - fuck!" Dean curses.
Sam smiles and presses his tongue against Dean's hole again, exulting in the shiver that runs through his brother's body.
"Jesus fucking Christ," Dean swears again, his muscles jumping.
Rimming's really not something that Jared's into that much. He'll try most things in bed once, but it's... not his thing. For pretty obvious reasons, he thinks. But wow, Sam is getting off on it. Not so much the act itself - though even that is oddly appealing, touching Dean in this way, claiming every last inch of him - but Dean's reactions, the way it's gradually driving him crazy. Watching him and listening to him slowly lose control: that is fucking awesome. And fucking hot.
"Fuck, Sammy," Dean groans, and Sam can feel his brother's body shake as he lifts one fist enough to slam it into the ugly carpet. "Who knew you had such - god - such a kinky streak?"
Sam doesn't reply, though he can feel a smirk tugging at his lips. He just licks his way further into Dean's body, feeling a wave of lust rush through him as his brother's words dissolve into moans and something closer to begging than Sam had expected, and fuck, suddenly it's not enough.
He doesn't want to pull back, but he has to in order to grab the lube and a condom, and it's kind of worth it for the sound Dean makes, the way he lurches and tries to twist round. Sam enjoys that - god, he enjoys knowing he's doing this to Dean, affecting him this deeply - but he returns quickly, blanketing himself against Dean's back until his brother relaxes again beneath him.
He takes the time to work Dean open, even though he knows that if his brother were any more coherent, he'd be bitching Sam out for taking his time. Tough shit, though: Sam isn't prepared to hurt Dean on purpose, not for this, not for anything.
Once he's satisfied that Dean's prepared enough, though, Sam doesn't waste time asking for permission that he already knows is his. He just slides in, slow and hard, blanketing Dean with his body, loving the way his brother gasps and goes still beneath him.
He does pause for a minute once he's in to let Dean adjust, leaning forward to run his mouth along the nape of Dean's neck, nipping and licking at the muscles and along his jawline. He's pretty sure he's leaving more marks, and he's fiercely glad, sucking even harder until Dean moans.
"Sam. God, Sammy -"
Dean's voice breaks off into a whine as Sam starts moving, hard and steady and brutally honest. Fucking into him: I'm here, I've got you, Dean. He leans back, changing the angle, running his hands down Dean's back and gripping his hips tightly, feeling his fingers dig in and hearing Dean moan.
It's better than he imagined it could be, finally being inside Dean, with his brother all around him. He wants to stay like this forever, in this moment where nothing can touch either of them, as they move together, completely in tune.
He can't, though. He can already feel himself getting close, can feel his rhythm getting sloppier. He reaches down and closes his hand around Dean's cock.
"Oh, fuck," Dean curses, pushing forward into his fist, and Sam can hear his breathing catch, see his muscles quiver.
Sam tightens his fist, jerks Dean off harder, fucks into him faster. He's vaguely aware that he's speaking, half-chanting Dean's name over and over under his breath, but it's hard to focus now on anything but the sensations, the way Dean is moving against him, the quiet, desperate sounds Dean is making.
Suddenly Dean cries out and goes rigid beneath him, and Sam's orgasm slams into him, hard and unexpected and overwhelming.
When he figures out where - if not who - he is again, he's lying on top of Dean - or is it Jensen? His mind struggles with it for a moment, then gives up, and he groans.
"Jesus Christ," Dean says, and yes, that definitely sounds like Dean, albeit a muffled Dean who's being ground face-down into a fugly carpet. "You're goddamn heavy, get off me."
Sam pulls out carefully, and rolls off his brother to stare up at the ceiling. "Wuss."
Dean rolls over to land on top of him, and Sam oofs a little as the air is driven out of him. "See how you like it, sasquatch."
Actually, Sam likes it rather a lot. He runs his hands over Dean's back, and judging by the way Dean settles his head against his shoulder, it seems he likes it more than he's willing to admit, too.
Dean pulls back and looks into his eyes very seriously for a moment, as if checking everything is okay, no regrets. Sam stares back, trying to let Dean see what he needs.
A smile tugs at Dean's lips, half-wry, half-wistful, and then he leans down and kisses him. Sam relaxes and goes with it.
When they finally pull apart, there's more of Jensen mixed in with the Dean looking down at him, and seeing it, Jared feels himself relax back into that shared headspace he'd been in earlier.
"Hey," he says, and feels a grin spread across his face as Jensen/Dean smiles down at him.
"Hey," Jensen says back. He looks better - yes, Dean's still mixed in there, but he doesn't appear to be dragging Jensen down for right now. Jensen looks as content as he has done in a long time, lying on top of Jared, arms wrapped snug around him.
Jared runs his hands across Jensen's back, tracing the marks he's left there. They're oddly reassuring, when he thinks of the weeks ahead and what's waiting for their alter-egos. They're something to hold onto.
"You been planning this little escapade long?" Jensen asks finally, shades of Dean colouring his query.
Jared grins, feeling one of Sam's smirks tugging at the corner of his mouth. "Nah. I just improvised."
Jensen raises an eyebrow. "You intending on spending the rest of the weekend... improvising, or have you come up with another one of your crazy plans yet?"
Jared lets the insult to his genius planning abilities slide for now. "Well," he says, "I figured we might try a shower, whenever you're ready to lift your heavy ass off of me. And then there's this bed we haven't even tested yet. After that..."
Jensen smiles, slow and inviting, Dean's sly innuendo leaking through. "Now that's a plan I can get behind."
Jared grins back, then gives in to Sam's mischievous streak and shoves Jensen off him.
"Bitch," Jensen says without heat, getting to his feet.
"Jerk," Jared replies, unable to stop grinning. He admires the view for a moment before extending a hand for Jensen to pull him up.
Jensen pulls too hard, deliberately tugging him off-balance so that Jared stumbles into him. Jensen sneaks a quick kiss in the process, then, too soon, breaks away and heads towards the bathroom. A moment later, Jared hears the shower turn on, and follows.
After all, there'll be plenty of time later, when Jensen's catching up on his sleep, for Jared to put Sam's research skills to good use and find somewhere isolated they can drive tomorrow. Somewhere no one will stumble on them; somewhere Sam can bend Dean over the hood of the Impala, and then...
Jared grins. He's always been good at improvisation.