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"Do you think she'd be proud of me?" Steve was curled into Bucky's side as they watched some movie he couldn't remember the title of. This was no accident. Steve didn't want Bucky seeing his face, because Bucky would automatically know this wasn't the first time Steve had pondered on this.
"Who?" Bucky asked wrapping his arm tighter around Steve.
"My ma," Steve answered after a second. He had asked it now; there was no backing out. Bucky didn't answer for a while. Instead, he stroked his thumb against Steve's hip through his shirt.
"Why wouldn't she be?" Bucky finally asked as if he couldn't think of any reason why anyone would be upset with Steve.
"Dunno," Steve muttered, "I just..." Steve let out a heavy sigh, "I've done so many things wrong. Like the whole thing with Tony. I could have done that so much better than I did, and if she were here she would've twisted my ear and told me I'm an idiot."
"If she were here she would twist your ear and tell you-you're being an idiot for thinking she wouldn't be proud of you," Bucky replied.
"Buck, I mean it." Steve sat up but didn't move away needing to be comforted by Bucky.
"So do I," Bucky answered and tried to get Steve to lean back down again.
"But she didn't like me getting into fights and now it's my day job," Steve argued weakly.
"She would understand what you do is bigger than you, and you help more people than if you didn't get into fights. Plus, you can hold your own now. You're not getting beat up down a backstreet in Brooklyn; you're fighting actual threats and saving people." Bucky tightened his grip on Steve and Steve allowed himself to get pulled back down.
"Do you think she would have agreed with me getting the serum in the first place? Changing who I am?" Steve sighed into Bucky's side.
"The serum didn't change you; it just made you bigger." Bucky continued to rub Steve's side.
"Shouldn't I have stayed small? She raised me to be happy with what I had." Bucky rolled his eyes at the weak argument.
"Where's this coming from, Steve?"
"I dunno. I don't like the idea of her being upset with my life choices." Steve mumbled.
"She's not, Punk."
"I always thought I'd be able to ask her before though." Steve snuggled closer to Bucky.
"What? Ask her if she was proud of you? I told you-"
"No, ask her if she liked who I wanted to marry." Steve interrupted. Bucky hesitated.
"Steve-"
"But I know she loved you and I wonder if she thought I was good enough for you."
"Steve, are you-"
"Buck, I can't ask her. And I can't ask your parents for permission. I can't ask anyone really. Apart from you, so I'm asking you if you'll marry me." Steve bit his lip. He hoped Bucky didn't mind that it wasn't exactly romantic.
"Let me talk, you stupid punk. This is what you planned to get out of this? Jesus Christ, of course, I'll marry you dumbass." Bucky moved his arm and consequently moved steve with it.
"Yeah?" Steve couldn't help the grin.
"Yeah, you and your insecurities." Bucky rolled his eyes but grinned right back at Steve. "I love you, and if you won't believe Sarah is proud of you, then know I am."
"I love you too Buck." Steve leaned in for a kiss which Bucky happily returned.
"I believe a congratulations is in order." The voice of Jarvis separated them.
"Thank you, Jarvis." Steve sub-consciously looked up at the ceiling. Bucky laughed and pulled him in for another kiss.
Steve still often wondered what his mother thought of his life choices but he knew she would be glad he stayed with Bucky.