It's My Move?

by Transparent_Axolotl

Summary:

When a new member of the Atlas crew starts flirting with Shiro, Keith he realizes that he has to take action.

  “Who’s that talking to Shiro?”

Veronica looks over, “Oh, him. He’s a new communications officer who arrived a month or so ago.”

Chapter 1

It is crowded in the Atlas break room when Keith and Veronica enter. It seems many of the pilots and some of the bridge crew are already there, including Shiro.

Keith is chatting with Veronica while they pour their coffee. Turning towards a high-top table to continue their conversation, Keith scans the room for Shiro. He finds him talking with someone new – someone smiling a lot and standing close to Shiro.

“Who’s that talking to Shiro?”

Veronica looks over, “Oh, him. He’s a new communications officer who arrived a month or so ago. Lieutenant… sorry, can can’t remember his name. Not much personality and only a mediocre officer. Was part of Shiro and Adam’s cohort, but has still only made lieutenant. I’m wondering how he even was assigned to Atlas. Looks like he and Shiro are good friends, though.”

Keith nods, scowls and stares at Shiro and the new guy before Veronica steals his attention with talk about Lance and Allura. When he looks back towards Shiro, he sees Shiro and the lieutenant exiting the break room together.

As Veronica continues to talk, Keith listens with half an ear while contemplating what he just saw. It is almost as if the scene set off his internal danger alert, anxiety roiling his stomach. But Shiro chats with everyone on the Atlas regularly, that is what makes him such a good leader. Why should this conversation seem any different?

Then it hits him – new guy was flirting with Shiro! Standing close like that, leaning in, smiling a lot, quiet conversation that has Shiro chuckling and smiling back. Shiro is either unaware of the flirting or… flirting back!

Was Shiro flirting back? That can’t be.

Keith is in love with Shiro. He has been since the day they met. He might only have been a teen then, but he knew what love was and he knew that Takashi Shirogane was it for him. Shiro was dating Adam at the time and Keith was jealous; although, he acknowledged that he was too young for Shiro to see as a partner. Keith is embarrassed to now admit, he was the happiest he had ever been when Shiro and his boyfriend broke up.

When he was stranded on the space whale the visions he saw of the future where very clear – he and Shiro were happy together in almost all realities. Their battle at the cloning facility was a constant, but after that it split into many different possible routes to their life together. Only two of them were different. In one, Shiro died during the last battle against the Galra. However, the other was the worst. Keith only saw part of the scene. Shiro was marrying someone he couldn’t see, but not him. Keith was viewing it as a guest at the event. That vision had him in tears.

Is this that reality? Is this the one where Keith and Shiro do not end up together. If so, he would be devastated.

He admits he noticed Shiro isn’t around quite so much. They don’t have as many meetings or joint projects any longer. And, since Shiro is always working, he is not as present for their down time. It almost feels like Shiro is purposefully pulling away from him. It hurts to realize that he might not mean the same to Shiro as Shiro means to him.

Realizing that he was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he was ignoring Veronica completely, he tuned back in to the conversation only to find that Veronica had stopped talking and was watching him.

“So, where did you go? You zoned out there for a bit.”

“Sorry, just going over all of the things I have to get done today and realizing there isn’t enough time. As usual.”

From the look on her face, Veronica knows he is lying but she plays along. “Well, that’s the signal then, time to get back to work. I’m needed on the bridge anyway to continue training the newbie.”

Keith barely acknowledges her departure, back to contemplating the situation.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Shiro is in the break room pouring himself coffee when someone approaches from behind, grasping him on the shoulder, an unknown voice follows.

“Shiro, nice to see you taking a break. You work yourself too hard. But then, you always did.” Shiro turns to identify the speaker as Curtis, a communications officer who was part of his cohort at the Academy. He recently transferred to the Atlas and has approached Shiro on a few occasions to talk about the old days and their classmates and friends.

“Curtis, how are you this morning?” Shiro asks as he finishes preparing his coffee, subtly shrugging Curtis’ hand off his shoulder.

“I’m doing great. The crew of the Atlas is very welcoming,” Curtis responds after pouring his own coffee and maneuvering Shiro to the side of the room while he talks. “They have a lot of respect for you, as can be expected. You are the leader everyone knew you would become. I’m learning quite a bit from them in coming up to speed. The work doesn’t seem too challenging.”

This statement catches at Shiro. His wonders about Curtis still coming up-to-speed after he has already been aboard Atlas for a month or more. His position isn’t that different from his previous ship. But more concerning is his view that working on Atlas isn’t challenging. Granted, they are still docked on Earth while deployment plans are finalized, but there is an awful lot of work going into preparing Atlas and finalizing those plans as well as the ongoing exercises with Voltron and the MFEs and the continued, ever increasing, contact with other coalition members. There is more than enough work to provide a challenge to any and every officer. In fact, he regularly forces his crew to take breaks, enjoy downtime and catch up with their family and friends while they are still here. They are usually working at 110%.

“I’m glad to hear my crew is helping you settle in. You’ve joined one of the best teams in the Garrison,”

He sees Keith and Veronica enter the breakroom and head to the coffee station. They are obviously conspiring about Lance and Allura; Shiro can tell by their giggles and smirks. He wishes he could join them, but he is trying to give Curtis the attention he would give any of his crew, even if he isn’t too fond of his company. He comes across as a suck-up. At least he has some entertaining stories of his old friends.

Also, Shiro acknowledges to himself, he has been trying to spend less time with Keith. He plays it off as not wanting to monopolize the Black Paladin’s time as well as not giving the appearance of favoritism. However, in truth, he has started finding it challenging to be in his company without admitting that he is in love with him. Truly in love with him, not as a brother. And, that is the problem. Keith has said, numerous times, that he loves Shiro like a brother. That is just not enough for Shiro any longer.

Veronica, the overly observant officer she is, noticed Shiro’s behavior and has started harassing him regularly to tell Keith the truth and see where things go from there. Stop worrying about favoritism, everyone knows he is too professional to let a personal relationship interfere with the mission. Her optimism about the resolution is uplifting; however, he knows how Keith feels and prefers to remain distant friends rather than killing what is left of their friendship.

Listening to Curtis with half an ear while his thoughts wander, Shiro responds half-heartedly to most of his stories, chuckling or humming in appropriate places. Eventually he says that he needs to return to the bridge, hinting Curtis should probably also return to work. They exit toward the bridge together.

Chapter 2

The Atlas hanger is abuzz with the Lions, MFEs, and other craft and equipment. The workday is wrapping up and Keith is on one side of the hanger with the MFE pilots going over results from the day and plans for tomorrow.

He spots Shiro on the other side of the hanger, and again, that new communications officer is with him. And again, he is standing too close to Shiro and this time touching his arm. Why is a communications officer in the hanger? And, more importantly, why is he touching Shiro!

The MFE pilots continue talking around him as Keith tunes out. Keith thoughts revert to his earlier contemplation – is this that reality, the one where Shiro marries someone else? It can’t be, Keith can tell Shiro feels something for him. He isn’t sure quite what, but there is something there even if Shiro has been pulling back. Why hasn’t Shiro acted on it. Why does it seem Shiro is responding to this new guy’s flirting, not approaching Keith about their obvious connection? There is something wrong, this doesn’t feel right at all. Shiro is such a strong person, he is a leader, he is obviously in control of himself and everything around him. Can he really be unsure of approaching Keith?

Then it hits him, in none of the alternate realities did he see Shiro approach him. He never saw a confession of feelings, only scenes with an already established relationship, even if an obviously new one. He also never saw any of his own actions. Does this mean that he is the one to approach Shiro? Has it been his move all along? Has he been waiting and waiting for something that he needs to initiate himself? Has he inadvertently been pushing Shiro toward someone else?

As the man continues to talk, an interesting look crosses Shiro’s face – sort of surprised, maybe even a little flattered. Shiro then looks across the hanger towards Keith. Keith tilts his head down to hide behind his hair so Shiro can’t tell he is watching. Shiro’s face so hopeful, a soft look in his eye. But seconds later, it falls into sadness and resignation. He turns back to the new guy and seems to say something that makes the guy smile and put his hand firmly on Shiro’s upper arm. Shiro’s face looks a little embarrassed at this point.

He quickly excuses himself from the group. “Sorry to run, I just realized I have to check with Shiro about one of our maneuvers tomorrow,” he says before he jogs across the hanger to Shiro.

“Hey Shiro!” Keith calls, just as Shiro and the new guy turn to leave. “Glad I caught you before you left. Can I go over something for tomorrow quickly?”

“Hi Keith, sure. Curtis, duty calls. I’ll catch up with you later.” Shiro turns from Curtis, missing the dirty look Curtis throws at Keith before leaving the hanger.

“So, who’s the new guy?” Keith isn’t sure what the dirty look was about, but it solidifies his initial dislike for the man.

“That is Curtis. Sorry, I didn’t realize you hadn’t met. He and I were in the same cohort at the academy. He joined the crew recently and has been catching me up on the goings on since my departure. It’s been nice to hear about my friends and where they ended up.

“So, you wanted to go over something for tomorrow?”

“Yep, there is a new maneuver I’d like Voltron and the MFE’s to try. I was hoping we could talk about it over dinner.”

“I was going to meet Curtis in the cafeteria to continue our conversation. But if this is important for tomorrow, we can grab a table together in the cafeteria.”

Keith hesitates briefly. No, definitely not the cafeteria. He doesn’t want to take a chance that the new guy, Curtis, will interrupt them. But where, where can he suggest? “Actually, I was hoping to talk somewhere else. The cafeteria is a little crowded and loud.” He racks his brain for ideas.

“Would my office work?” Shiro offers.

“I have a better idea. Meet me back here in a half hour – and throw on casual clothes.”

“Umm, sure. I can do that.

“Good, I’ll see you in 30.”

Ok, first, back to his quarters to change, then to the cafeteria to grab food. All in 30 minutes while trying not to obviously run around Atlas in a ball of anxiety. Sure, he can do this he thinks somewhat self-deprecatingly.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Shiro is in the hanger, having just finished a discussion with Sam Holt about improvements to Atlas’ power generation, when Curtis approaches him again. Why is Curtis in the hanger and why is he approaching again, wonders Shiro. There is no reason for either of these things. If the bridge needs him, they’ll ping him. He is especially concerned because Curtis should not want to appear to be brownnosing the Admiral. The rest of the crew would not take kindly to that, given their protectiveness of Shiro.

“Curtis, what brings you here?”

Curtis’s stuttered excuse is that he had to drop something off with the maintenance crew, which doesn’t make any sense. However, he parlays that directly into asking Shiro to join him for dinner in the cafeteria to continue talking about the old days. He keeps touching Shiro’s arm and moving too close.

Shiro doesn’t want to be rude, so doesn’t tell him to back off, although he is uncomfortable. He looks around the hanger for an escape and sees Keith talking to the MFE pilots. He ardently hopes that Keith will rescue him from Curtis, but that is probably too much to ask. Keith probably hasn’t even noticed he was here, he is obviously focused on his discussion with the pilots and doesn’t see him. Shiro also knows that he has been slowly distancing himself from Keith. Slowly minimizing contact and situations where they might be alone. It had become too painful to spend so much time together, even as friends, when Shiro wants so much more from the relationship. Keith hasn’t said anything, hasn’t made a point to try to see Shiro, so Shiro knows the distance he put between them is only right for them both. He knows that Keith only sees him as a close friend, a mentor, a brother as he has said before. Shiro loses hope of a rescue and reluctantly agrees to Curtis’ offer turning with him to leave the hanger.

“Hey Shiro! Glad I caught you before you left. Can I go over something for tomorrow quickly?”

“Hi Keith. Sure, I have a moment.” Oh, thank god, Keith is rescuing him from Curtis. “Curtis, duty calls. I’ll catch up with you later.”

“So, who was the new guy?”

“That is Curtis. Sorry, I didn’t realize you hadn’t met. He and I were in the same cohort at the academy. He joined the crew recently and has been catching me up on the goings on since my departure. It’s been nice to hear about my friends and where they ended up.” Shiro responds trying to put the best face on the interactions; he doesn’t want to badmouth a new crew member.

“So, you wanted to go over something for tomorrow?” Shiro says, hoping for a long enough discussion that they can work through dinner. Or, maybe he will just eat in his office again, while he powers through the ever-growing pile of paperwork waiting for him. That would be better than running into Curtis in the cafeteria.

“Yep, there is a new maneuver I’d like the MFE’s to try. I was hoping we could talk about it over dinner,”

This is perfect, Shiro thinks, excited at the possibility to spend some time with Keith. But then he reminds himself that he is supposed to be distancing himself and reigns in his enthusiasm. “I was going to meet Curtis in the cafeteria to continue our conversation. But if this is important for tomorrow, we can grab a table together in the cafeteria.”

“Actually, I was hoping to talk somewhere else. The cafeteria is a little crowded and loud.”

“Would my office work?” Shiro offers, glad that he won’t have to endure the chance that Curtis will interrupt them.

“I have a better idea. Meet me back here in a half hour – and throw on casual clothes.”

“Umm, sure. I can do that.” Shiro is a little surprised at the request, but willing to play along. It reminds him of the days before Kerberos when they used to escape the Garrison. But he doesn’t want to get his hopes up, Keith only wants to talk about a new maneuver.

“Good, I’ll see you in 30.”

Chapter 3

Thirty-five minutes later Keith runs into the hanger with two bags from the cafeteria. He sees Shiro already waiting. “Hey! Sorry I’m a little late, I was held up in the cafeteria.”

“Don’t worry, you aren’t really late. I just got here myself.”

“Oh, good.”

“So, are we going over the new maneuver here in the hanger?

“Nope, not here. Follow me.” Keith motions for Shiro to follow as he walks over to one of the small transport ships in the hanger.

“Am I allowed to know where I’m going, so I can alert the bridge? Or, are you kidnapping the Admiral?” Shiro asks with a chuckle.

“Oh yeah, we should report. Just tell them you are with me and they can reach us over the comms.”

“Roger that.”

Keith is reminded of the banter they used to engage in frequently before they became too busy and distance crept in their relationship. Keith realizes that they had stopped communicating, he had stopped communicating in the same way over the last few months. That thought solidifies what he must do – and he must do it now.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Shiro arrives back at the hanger exactly 30-minutes later. He can’t help but be punctual, especially since he is having dinner with Keith for the first time in… he doesn’t remember how long. But Keith is no where to be seen. Shiro wonders if something held him up or if there is an emergency. Or maybe Keith decided that he didn’t need to discuss the maneuver with Shiro and sent a message cancelling.

As soon as Shiro moves to check his messages, Keith rushes into the hanger. “Hey! Sorry I’m a little late, I was held up in the cafeteria.”

“Don’t worry, you aren’t really late. I just got here myself,” he reassures Keith, not wanting to make him feel bad.

“Oh, good,”

When further instructions or details are not forthcoming, Shiro prompts, “So, are we going over the new maneuver here in the hanger?

“Nope, not here. Follow me.” Keith motions for Shiro to follow as he walks over to one of the small transport ships.

Shiro follows; he thinks, hopes, that Keith is intending to take them somewhere off the ship. “Am I allowed to know where I’m going, so I can alert the bridge? Or, are you kidnapping the Admiral?” Shiro chuckles while strapping himself into the copilot seat.

“Oh yeah, we should report. Just tell them you are with me and they can reach us over the comms.”

“Roger that.” Shiro confirms, relaying the information to the comms officer on bridge.

This feels nice, Shiro thinks. It reminds him so much of their old banter. Shiro almost regrets that he distanced himself. But, reminds himself not to fall too far back into Keith’s orbit, for his own protection.

Chapter 4

Keith lands the transport on a familiar cliff in the desert surrounding the Garrison. He looks over at Shiro who is smiling softly and longingly.

“You brought us here. This was our place to escape to when we needed to get out of the Garrison. I thought you might have forgotten about it.” Shiro is so happy to be here, this has always been their spot to unwind and escape. He realizes that this is just what he needs right now.

“Never! I came back here frequently after I left the Garrison. It always reminded me of good times, helped me feel like the world wasn’t out to get me.

“It reminded me of you,” Keith concludes softly, looking Shiro in the eye.

Shiro looks at Keith. He doesn’t know what to say in that moment without blurting out how he feels. He needs to keep this detached, solely a reminiscence.

Keith clears his throat, “Come, let’s have dinner. We should eat the cafeteria food while it is still somewhat warm and edible,”

They find a spot close to the edge of the cliff where they can see miles into the distance, the sun slowly sinking into the horizon. Sitting close together, Keith hands one of the cafeteria containers to Shiro who opens it to find a great surprise.

“Mac and cheese, my favorite. You remembered!”

“Of course. How could I forget your favorite meal!”

While they eat, they talk about their friends, the paladins, the MFE’s, how Lance and Allura’s nascent relationship is going. Time flies, neither realizing that they finish their food and the evening progresses. It is easy, casual, familiar.

Shiro finally realizes how late it is. “I thought we were going to talk about a new maneuver you wanted to try.”

Keith looks back at him smiling sheepishly, “Well, I have to admit, that was just an excuse to get you away. It has been too long since we spent any time together. We are both so busy, we barely have time to catch up with each other. It seems we only talk during meetings.

“I missed this. I missed talking with you, bantering, just being with you.”

“I’ve missed you to, Keith. I’m sorry we haven’t spent much time together recently. It is my fault for focusing too hard on work. Honestly, I’ve felt a little lost without you so close. But you have your duties and your life and have grown into your own as leader of Voltron and friends with the MFE pilots. You don’t need me as you used to.”

“I still need you, Shiro. I will never not need you. You are so very important to me. I need you in a different way now. I might rely on you less as a mentor, but you will always be my friend. In fact, you are more than a friend to me.”

Keith takes a deep, calming breath while Shiro braces himself to be called his brother yet again.

“Shiro, Takashi, I love you. I am in love with you. I want to spend my life with you,” Keith declares, looking Shiro directly in the eyes with hope and love shining bright.

Shiro is stunned. He can’t believe what Keith just told him – Keith loves him! His brain shuts down and he doesn’t know how to respond. He doesn’t know if he can trust his ears.

Silence lasts for long enough that Keith feels dejected and lowers his eyes, tears forming in the corners.

“I understand that you don’t feel the same way, that you see me as only a brother. I won’t let my feelings interfere with my ability to do my job, to lead Voltron and coordinate with the Atlas crew. I hope I haven’t made things difficult between us or for our friends,” Keith sadly adds.

Keith starts to move away from Shiro, gathering up their dinner containers. This seems to snap Shiro back to attention. He reaches out and grabs Keith’s wrist to hold him in place.

“Keith, wait! I’m sorry. Don’t go. I was surprised.”

“That’s ok. Don’t worry, I won’t bother you about this again. I just came to a realization that I couldn’t not tell you.”

“That’s not what I meant. I’m surprised in a good way. Keith, I’m in love with you. I love you completely. I thought you only saw me as a friend, as a brother. I was resigned to that relationship. I started to pull back because it hurt being so close.”

Keith smiles serenely and lovingly at Shiro, staring into his eyes for what feels like an eternity. Slowly, he leans forward into Shiro’s personal space, sliding his hands over Shiro’s shoulders. “Is this ok?” he asks.

“Yeah, yeah it is.” Shiro leans forward also, resting his forehead on Keith’s, both smiling brightly. After a few moments, their lips meet in a soft, emotion-filled kiss. Keith’s arms snake around Shiro’s neck, while Shiro’s arms circle Keith’s waist.

Eventually, they both pull back breaking the kiss, but not moving far apart. They look deeply into each other’s eyes. “Yeah, that…,” whispers Shiro and then leans in to kiss Keith again long and deep.

They finally pull apart slightly, “I guess I should get you back. I wouldn’t want anyone to think I’d kidnapped the Admiral.

But I don’t want this day to end. I’m afraid I will wake up to find it was only a dream.”

“This isn’t a dream. The day might be ending, but our life together is just beginning.” Neither make a motion towards leaving. Instead, they are drawn into another kiss until Shiro’s comm unit chirps with a notification. “I think they’ve found us, now we do have to head back.” Shiro stands, offering Keith a hand to stand up.

As the sunsets, they walk back to the transport leaning together, Shiro’s arm is around Keith’s shoulders and Keith’s arm is around Shiro’s waist, head tilted on his shoulder.

Notes:

Here ends my first fic ever. I'd like to thank all the experienced authors out there who have posted advice for new authors. It has been enormously helpful and gave me the confidence to post this.