Work Text:
08/12 - 3:57am
gingerbread lattes fucking suck
good morning to you too, chuuya~ changed your mind about that date already?
no way in hell
how did you know it was me
who else would text me that from an unknown number at four in the morning?
what are you doing up this early anyway?
none of your business asshole
my shift starts at 4:30
so early!!
i guess i’ll see you later then <3
not if i can help it
08/12 - 9:52am
why were YOU awake at 4am
my, my, chuuya, if i didn’t know any better i’d think you're trying to get to know me
think again douchebag
12/12 - 4:27pm
you weren’t there today ( •́ ∧ •̀ ) and after i came specifically to see you, too
its thursday idiot
thats always my day off
you think i’ve memorized your schedule? arrogant
you come in every fucking day shithead youd have to be completely stupid not to have noticed im never there on thursdays
maybe i’m never there on thursdays either. ever think of that?
you’re the most annoying person ive ever met
it’s a skill i’ve worked many years to hone
13/12 - 2:38pm
what are you doing this weekend?
no.
((´д｀))
Chuuya isn’t sure how or when it happened. It didn’t feel like a gradual thing, but it wasn’t sudden either. It was like the sunset - bit by bit, barely noticeable, but as soon as you look away, it’s night time.
That’s how this feels. One day, he can’t stand the sight of Dazai’s stupid face, and every word the bastard says makes him want to kick him into next week, and all is right with the world. But the next, he finds himself almost looking forward to seeing him. Every time the door opens, he gets a tiny flutter of excitement in his chest - which he quashes quickly, of course - and every time it isn’t Dazai, he feels the slightest flash of annoyance. In spite of his best efforts, he thinks he might be starting to like Dazai.
It’s disgusting.
It must be like stockholm syndrome, or something - he’s gotten so used to being annoyed by him that he’s just come to expect it as part of his daily life. That’s it. That’s gotta be it.
It’s not like he enjoys it or anything.
15/12 - 8:35am
what time do you go on break?
why the fuck do you want to know
why do you think? so i can spend more time talking to chuuya of course!!
shut up and die
itll be in half an hour
It’s almost three weeks into December, and if Chuuya has to make Dazai one more fucking gingerbread latte, he’s going to lose it.
“I don’t know how you can drink this shit,” he mumbles, pumping an ungodly amount of syrup into the cup. “It’s giving me cavities just by looking at it.”
“That’s what’s so wonderful about it,” Dazai grins. “It’s perfectly sweet and delicious!”
“It’s nauseating, and so are you.”
“Charming. Hey, what are you doing this weekend?”
“Nothing with you.”
Dazai pouts. “Oh, come on. I’ve been asking you for weeks to do something with me. You’re starting to make me doubt my own charm. I might have to give you up as a lost cause.”
“Good. Give up.” He pours the steamed milk into the cup with unnecessary focus, and speaks without looking in what he hopes is a bored and uninterested tone of voice. “What did you have in mind?”
He doesn’t need to look to see Dazai’s grin. He can feel it, like a physical entity filling the whole room.
“There’s a Christmas--”
“No way in hell.”
“You don’t even know what I was going to say!”
“I don’t need to.” He shakes the whipped cream canister. “Anything with the word Christmas in it - I’m out.”
He gasps, clutching his chest as if in pain. “Chuuya is a Grinch? I don’t believe this. Maybe I really should give up on you.”
“Fuck off.” He pushes the finished latte across the bar to Dazai. “I just don’t like Christmas. Never have, never will. Now take your shitty drink and go.”
Dazai wraps a long-fingered hand around the drink, but doesn’t take it off the counter. Instead, he leans in close to Chuuya, a serious look in his eyes. “You know what this means, don’t you?” he says.
Chuuya feels his cheeks warm and resists the powerful urge to lean in closer. “What?” he asks flatly.
“Now I have two missions - get Chuuya to go on a date with me, and get Chuuya to love Christmas.”
He wrinkles his nose. “Neither of those things will ever happen.”
“Never say never, Chuuya.” He takes his drink, and gives a little wave with his free hand. “I’ll see you tomorrow!”
Chuuya rolls his eyes. “Unfortunately for me.”
Dazai only laughs, and wiggles his fingers as he walks away - long strides, perfect posture, narrow hips swaying.
18/12 - 1:53am
what exactly is it that you hate about christmas?
whats not to hate
that response leaves me no choice but to believe you’ve never actually experienced christmas in your life
18/12 - 2:46am
you must like christmas cookies at least
18/12 - 4:28am
what about christmas movies? do you hate christmas movies too?
18/12 - 10:39am
do you ever sleep
answer the question, chibi
fuck you
Chuuya isn’t sure what makes him say it.
He’s shaking nutmeg onto Dazai’s gingerbread latte, and Dazai is talking. About what, he isn’t sure. He thinks his brain checked out at least two hours ago.
He puts the nutmeg back on the counter and looks Dazai straight in the eye.
“My shift ends in fifteen minutes.”
Dazai blinks. “Congratulations?”
Chuuya’s eyebrow twitches. “If you’re not doing anything…” he trails off. He doesn’t think he’s physically capable of saying the words. He might vomit if he does.
Dazai’s face lights up like a Christmas tree.
“This is not a date,” Chuuya says quickly. “So don’t go thinking you’ve won, or anything.”
His grin is so bright Chuuya thinks he might go blind. He doesn’t even look smug, which Chuuya would fully have expected - just genuinely excited. It’s cu-- infuriating .
He speaks through his smile, his eyes glittering. “No thanks,” Dazai says.
Chuuya freezes. There’s no way he heard that right. “What?”
“No thanks.” He takes his drink off the counter and takes a sip, shrugging. “I don’t really feel like it today.”
“You - you don’t --”
He gives one of his stupid little waves. “The coffee is especially good today.”
“Y-you --”
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Chibi!”
Chuuya stays frozen in place as Dazai walks away. Remains still as the door swings shut behind him. Doesn’t move for what might be ten seconds, or ten minutes.
No thanks.
No thanks?!
He pesters Chuuya for - for weeks ! And then he says no fucking thanks? What the hell is with him? The nerve of him! The fucking - the - he’s -
The door opens once more, and Dazai waltzes in. He’s grinning ear to ear, all triumphant smugness, and Chuuya wants to punch him so fucking badly .
“Saturday,” Dazai says simply. “Four o’clock. I’ll text you the address. Okay, Chibi?”
And with that, a wave, and a wink, he’s out the door again.
Chuuya is silent for a solid four seconds. Then -
“ That fucking bastard!”
18/12 - 1:56pm
im going to kill you with my bare fucking hands