Chapter Text
Within the past three days, Eli had been doing a lot of talking and a lot of thinking. Turns out therapy WAS what he needed to unpack the fucked up living organism that was himself.
First, he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. At first he was aghast at the revelation, and it shook him to his core for all of the wrong reasons. He didn’t want to be known as one of those “crazies” that couldn’t control his emotions. Every insult that was thrown at him since he was little suddenly felt valid. Even when his therapist brought up all of the famous people that had bipolar disorder, such as Ernest Hemingway or Edgar Allen Poe, he still felt terrible, like a monster. Vincent Van Gogh was suspected of having bipolar disorder and cut his ear off during a manic episode. That was bad enough already. But he himself had already topped that by crashing his hearse into a wall and burning a script on stage, who knows what else he could do to top that? Would he cut his own dick off during one of his manic episodes? He was scared of himself.
After the second day of therapy, his therapist had recommended him a book to read. It was Me, In An Infinite Universe, a memoir by Craig Manning. Even though he was getting increasingly annoyed at being connected to this guy, he bought the book from the bookstore anyway and spent all night reading it. In his memoir, the singer talked about his life at Degrassi, the mistakes he made with girls, his singing career, and most importantly his struggles with bipolar disorder. Eli cringed at some of the things Craig did during his manic episodes because he could see himself doing the same thing, such as destroying a hotel room because his girlfriend, Ashley Kerwin, wouldn’t accept his marriage proposal when they were teenagers. Again, he himself crashed his hearse into a wall because Clare wanted a break.
He was surprised at how much he and Craig were alike, even though they seemed so different at first. The passion the guy put into his music was something he could understand with his own passion for writing. The trapped, upset, angry, and confused feelings Craig felt when he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder was something Eli could relate heavily to right now. It was like the guy was reading his mind. There was also the way Craig’s stepfather stepped on eggshells around him after he was diagnosed, which his own parents were doing right now. The deep annoyance the musician was feeling at his goofy, light hearted stepfather suddenly being strict as hell was very relatable right now.
Then there was the fact that they both committed some very bad missteps with girls, which Eli was ashamed to admit even though he never cheated on his girlfriends like this Craig somehow did with all of his girlfriends. This whole period of being away from school made him realize that he had a problem in relationships with girls that he needed to fix if he ever wanted to be in a successful relationship.
He thought about Julia and how many times they fought because of him and his insecurities. Sure, there were plenty of times where Julia started the fights first. Julia had a short temper, was possessive, and would often accuse him of cheating or ignoring her. But he was the same way, and the last fight they would ever have before she got hit by that car was because he thought she was cheating with an older guy she met at a music store. It was something that he possibly might not ever forgive himself for even though his therapist pointed out that he didn’t kill her by hitting her with that car. It was still his fault she got angry enough to get on her bike that day in the first place.
Then there was Clare. He wouldn’t blame her if she never wanted to speak to him again after everything he did to her in and out of their relationship. He was possessive, manipulative, and controlling of her. He wrote a play just to slander her and her new boyfriend. He couldn’t imagine how humiliated she must have felt watching Love Roulette. Eli wanted to dig himself into a hole for how he treated her. He knew why he did those things. It was because Clare was such a breath of fresh air after Julia’s death, and such an innocent soul that he got attached quickly to her and didn’t want to let her go, even if the love they had was no longer there. He was chasing the dream of them overcoming their struggles and being a power couple, even though it was nothing more than a nightmare. During this whole disaster of a semester, he had forgotten that she was her own person and it led to him committing a heinous act. It was for the best that he let go whatever feelings he had for her and move on.
Imogen was another girl he fucked over during this chaotic time. He had no real feelings for her beyond a slight attraction to her but he led her on anyway because she stroked his ego at a time that he thought he needed it. Sure, she was a little irritating, but the poor girl did not deserve the cruel words he said to her over the locker situation.
But the girl who he hurt the most was Marisol, and what he did to her was possibly the worst act he ever had done other than crashing Morty. Once the haze cleared, he was ashamed of himself for how he treated her. He couldn’t believe how he just let himself use her and throw her away like that, especially since he knew that she was in love with him for whatever reason. He had thought that Marisol only was interested in hooking up with him at first just to see what it was like to sleep with a goth guy. It’s how he rationalized himself rejecting her. But she didn’t see him as just a conquest, she saw the kind of freak he was and wanted to be in an actual relationship with him. She genuinely wanted Eli Goldsworthy, not Emo Boy. Eli looked back on all the moments where she went out of her way to try to get to know the real him by talking to him and bringing fun into his life. She was unexpectedly a light in the darkness.
And he threw that away.
What hurt the most was that during this time of reflection, where he was finally seeing things clearly because of the medication, he realized that Marisol never “enchanted” or “bewitched” him, nor did she need to.
Because he was in love with her too, and he didn’t want to admit it until it was too late. There was no use for it now because he destroyed whatever chance they had of becoming a real couple by hurting her beyond relief. But here he was, in love with her, missing her, and regretting how he treated her. She was already suffering trauma from her sexual assault and he used, then abandoned her when she trusted him so much. He didn’t even want to look her in the eyes when he came back to school because the guilt was eating him up.
She was beautiful, upbeat, strong, caring, adventurous, bubbly, and far brighter than she looked. She was different from every girl he was interested in or was interested in him. He only bothered to appreciate that now that she was gone.
He was in love with Marisol Lewis, but they could never be together because he ruined whatever budding romance they had.
He was utterly miserable right now.
The school year was almost over, and with that, she could put all of the awful shit that happened this semester past her.
Thank fuck for that.
Marisol was pinning up posters of Katie for her best friend’s campaign for school president on walls, on lockers, and on boards. The goal was to spread her friend’s face everywhere around the school so people knew what their future president looked like.
There was not a single person at Degrassi that deserved to be president more than Katie Matlin. Katie was intelligent, independent, hard-working, organized, devoted, and a leader. Sure Katie could work more on having a friendlier personality but that didn’t take away from her other amazing qualities. From the time they were kids, Katie had involved herself in multiple school projects and organizations to establish herself as a woman of many talents. She was a class representative for grade six and grade seven, their eighth grade class president, their homeroom representative for junior year, and head of the school newspaper, so she was already experienced in being a school leader.
Marisol didn’t have any doubt that her friend would win, with her only competition being Mo Mashkour, a goofy, obnoxious loser of a guy. He had zero experience with running anything, he was immature, he had no charisma, and he was just gross to look at. Ew. Katie had this in the freaking bag.
When they entered Degrassi as freshmen, they swore to each other that they were going to run the school. It took them three, long years to get there but the opportunity was now. Katie will be school president and she herself will not only be her vice president but captain of the Power Squad.
Nothing will stop them.
While Marisol was shoving giant pins that read “Vote For Katie Matlin!” on them inside peoples’ lockers, she heard footsteps approaching. She turned and started scowling immediately when she saw it was Owen walking towards her.
“Hey Mari,” he greeted cheerfully as he leaned on the locker next to the one in front of her.
“What?” She demanded, folding her arms.
“Is that any way to greet your ex?” He questioned her with a frown on his face.
“An ex that’s filthy dog,” she replied sharply.
“Come on, when are you going to get over sophomore year? That was a lifetime ago!” He exclaimed while throwing his arm up in frustration.
“A year ago is a lifetime ago to you? You really live life recklessly don’t you?” She asked him incredulously.
“Well what do you want me to do? Apologize for cheating on you when I already did a hundred times? And you still didn’t take me back after I was practically begging like a fucking wimp,” he argued.
“Because that was like the hundredth time you cheated on me Owen! You cheated on me that time with two other bitches at a party, while I was crying over my best friend being in the fucking hospital! You knew how hard I was struggling with that and you cheated on me anyway! You had NO self-control when we dated!” She shouted at him. Several kids in the hallway looked at them, and they both gave them nasty glares to scare them off.
“And I’m sorry for that, okay? You may not believe but I’m one hundred percent sorry for all of the times I cheated on you with Bianca and other girls, and I would like to make amends with you,” he offered. She narrowed her eyes in suspicion.
“Amends? Like what?” She asked, having a bad feeling about what it was.
“Like me taking you out on a date tonight at your favorite restaurant,” he replied with a suggestive smirk on his face. His handsome face used to be one she loved seeing every day but how she wanted to punch it.
The thought was already making her want to vomit.
“Don’t you have a girlfriend? You know, Anya Macpherson, my fellow power squad member?” She asked him wearily. Was he really willing to cheat on sweet Anya too, and with her of all people? Her friend didn’t deserve that at all and Marisol couldn’t wait to snitch on Owen to her.
Owen snorted. “I had to dump her because she’s a cokehead and I don’t put up with that kind of bullshit as you know, Mari,” he explained.
“So you just went through a messy ass breakup and you come crawling back to me? Wow, you move on quick, don’t you Owen?” She asked with a sneer. It reminded her of how he was tonguing another girl like a week after they broke up the first time, and second time, and third time….
….Yeah Owen never waited long to get into another relationship.
“She was great, but not as great as you. Plus you’re way hotter than she is. We were great together, and I know we can be great again,” he pitched to her, and she rolled her eyes at his arrogance. So this was just about him trying to get some ass to renew his pride. There was no way he only wanted a date out of her. Owen was all about sex when they dated, and there was no way she was ever opening her legs for him again so he was shit out of luck.
“No thank you. I have an election for my best friend to win. Ciao!” She told him goodbye as she purposely shoved past him. She looked back at him to see if his smug look was wiped off his stupid face.
To her shock and slight disturbance, it wasn’t.
In fact, he was giving her a smile that was quite predatory.
So far, Fiona had easily forgiven him with the gift he bought her and Jake had not. It was at least a start but a troubling one. He really fucked up bad, didn’t he? He knew he deserved it but it was very frustrating. Jake flat out dismissed whatever he had to say after he tried to apologize to him after class. He knew what he did to the guy was awful, but Jake could at least try to understand that he was genuinely sorry. Fear creeped up in him, because if Jake wasn’t willing to forgive him then Clare definitely would not. She was a kind person but she was already incredibly cold when she wanted to be. He was fucked.
Eli was walking to his locker when he saw the person who probably hated him the most in front of it. He froze for a moment. From where he was standing, he could see Marisol glaring at his locker as she stuck a poster with Katie’s face onto it with a star-shaped sticker. She then reached into her purse and shoved a button pin through one of the openings. Just as she was about to leave, he decided to speak up.
“Mare!” He called as he ran up to her.
She scowled as she turned to walk away from him, but he grabbed her arm in time. “Wait, hear me out,” he pleaded while looking into her eyes. They were filled with both hate and hurt towards him as expected these days.
“Eli, I’m not in a good mood and you just made it worse. What do you want?” She demanded as she yanked her arm out of his grip. He noticed that because of the heels she was wearing, she slightly towered over him, and he was sure that she was hoping she came off as intimidating towards him. He hated to admit that she did, but she also looked beautiful. She was living fire at this moment, and he couldn’t help but still be attracted to her right now.
Wow he was really head over heels for her, wasn’t he? He was in danger.
“Your forgiveness,” Eli answered, and she sucked her teeth in indignation, “And I’ll do anything to earn it. Anything,” he emphasized, trying to get through to her.
“I don’t even want to speak to you. Forgiveness is off the menu,” she spat at him.
“Please, Mare. I know what I did to you was completely inexcusable and I will never forgive myself but please allow me to at least try-“
“You basically told me that I was good enough to suck your dick but not good enough to be in a relationship with you after leading me on. There’s nothing you can do that can make me trust you again,” Marisol cut him off sharply. Her attitude was starting to give him anxiety.
“I’ll help Katie win the election! I can hang up posters, I can hand out buttons, I can convince my friends to vote for her, and I’ll even wear a shirt with her face on it. Let me at least do that for you,” he begged her, and he was firmly aware of how desperate he came off as. He didn’t care. Inside, he was disgusted at the thought of wearing Katie Matlin’s face anywhere on his body but it was worth it if he could at least be on good terms with Mare. Hell, he would even get a tattoo of Katie’s face on his forehead at this point.
She kept glaring at him before shoving a stack of posters at his chest. While he hastily grabbed them before they fell, she reached into her bag and pulled out a bunch of buttons.
“Here, take these,” Marisol snarled as she handed the buttons to him as well, “Now leave me alone and I might just not want to spit at the sight of you. Someone will get you a shirt later.” She stormed off with her heels clacking loudly against the floor. He was amazed at how fast she managed to walk in those shoes without slipping.
He sighed as he looked at the campaign stuff in his arms. He did not want to help Katie at all because he couldn’t stand her. She vandalized his locker for fuck’s sake. A part of him still wanted to vote for Mo just to spite her. But if he wanted Mare to even look at him again without disgust, he was going to put his distaste for her friend aside and campaign for her.
‘The things I do for love,’ he thought to himself with a shudder.
“Okay let’s get started. Now tomorrow, we’ll kick off campaigning by having candidates introduce themselves. The next day we’ll have a Q&A and we’ll send everyone off to the polls. Any questions?” Principal Simpson asked as he addressed everyone in the cafeteria. There was a sizable crowd of student council hopefuls, but there were only two brave enough to run for president, and only one of them had a chance of winning.
Marisol shared a prideful look with Katie. She could already see the words “Vice President” on her college resume. Simpson blinked before he began to talk again.
“No? Okay, well for our class president, we have Mo Mashkour and Katie Matlin-“
“Is it too late to run, Mr. Simpson?” Owen asked as he sauntered in with his posse of jock friends. Multiple students looked at him in surprise and even Mr. Simpson himself widened his eyes in shock.
“Su...Sure. Is there anyone else? No okay,” the principal replied as he wrote the asshole’s name on a pad.
Marisol was aghast at what was happening.
Why the fuck would Owen want to run for president when one he was a complete idiot, and two he only gave a fuck about hockey and nothing else?
Katie was looking at her in utter confusion as Owen smiled smugly at them both.
“Sweet,” he commented as he folded his arms confidently. Anger boiled inside of her, and it took all in her to not proclaim his surprise bid as bullshit in front of everyone. Well, it was bullshit but it wouldn’t look good for Katie’s running mate to end up in detention during her campaign. Marisol opted to tightly keep her mouth shut while fixing her douchebag ex a glare while he was clearly finding this all amusing. Something about this wasn’t right.
What was he up to?
Well this was a little embarrassing.
“So when are you going to get the face tattoo that says you’re Katie Matlin’s bitch?” Adam asked him in a teasing tone of voice.
“Hush,” Eli replied sharply as he smoothed out his shirt in the bathroom. He was wearing Katie’s campaign shirt that Drew gleefully handed him. As predicted, he looked like a fucking idiot in it. Wonderful. Even worse, he had her pins on his backpack and her stickers on his notebooks. He looked like Katie’s own personal cheerleader.
“Or maybe you should carry around a light up sign that says ‘Property of Katie Matlin’,” his best friend continued with a smirk.
“Shut the fuck up, Adam,” he warned while his best friend snickered in response. He groaned. This shit was beyond embarrassing.
“With an attitude like that, I might just vote for Mo instead.”
“You can vote for whoever you want, but at least I tried,” Eli dryly replied, “But please actually vote for Katie.”
“Marisol Lewis sure has a strong power over you, Eli,” Adam pointed out in amusement.
“She does,” he admitted with a shrug.
“I think it’s kinda cute. This will definitely make her hate you a little less.”
“That’s the goal. Knowing her though, she will probably still want to spit at me when she sees me in the hallway,” Eli replied grumpily.
“Don’t think like that! Not with the way you’re fighting to make sure her BFF ends up president. If Katie wins, she’ll be grateful for that at least, right?” Adam pointed out hopefully.
“We’ll see but for now, I have other people on my list to make amends with.”
“Am I really the only person you haven’t pissed off this semester?”
“Yup.”
It wasn’t hard to find Owen. Like always, he was in the school gym practicing by lifting weights.
“You must be snorting the same coke your ex-girlfriend was. What the fuck is wrong with you?” Marisol demanded out of him as she stormed in the gym.
Her ex-boyfriend stopped lifting weights, and gave her a dark smile as he rose up to face her. He was wearing a red-shirt with his face on it with the words “Vote For Owen Milligan”. She didn’t know how he got to make a shirt that fast but it was ugly just like his spirit.
“Hello to you too, Mare,” he greeted cheerfully as he got off the stand and walked up to her. While most girls would be intimidated by his height and bulky frame, she was not. At least not at this moment.
“Answer the fucking question, asshole. Why are you running for school president against Katie?” She asked, not having time to deal with his bullshit. He always had a fetish for starting shit just because he can.
“Because I can,” he answered casually, seemingly reading her thoughts, “Is it illegal to run for student council now?”
“You never gave a fuck about anything involving the student council until now, cut the shit. What are you even gaining from this?” She interrogated.
“I don’t know.....the admiration of my peers, hot girls, a great look for my college application, the approval of my parents....so many wonderful things can come out of this, Mare,” he explained, not letting go of his dark smile, “You’re not scared of me winning against Katie, are you?” He asked her while tilting his head.
“Don’t make me laugh,” she sneered, “No one is going to vote for you except bimbos and your brainless jock buddies.”
“Oh really? I might not seem like the worst choice for school president when the only other options are a lard ass and a bitchy newspaper chick.....who used to be a binge queen.....hmm....,” he taunted.
She immediately knew what he was implying.
“You wouldn’t dare....,” she snarled.
He blinked innocently, and she almost slapped him.
“I mean a real president wouldn’t hide something like that from their people right? Plus I personally wouldn’t trust a person who had bulimia to handle anything involving food. Must just start puking in the toilet again. The public needs to know this information,” he told her with mock concern.
She was floored by how cruel he could be. Owen was always an asshole but this was on another level.
“You‘re really going to expose Katie’s bulimia to the whole school when you were there with me when she collapsed and nearly died from purging? You know how hard I cried that night and for months afterwards while she was in recovery. You know how depressed I was. Are you fucking serious right now?” She asked, in a combination of shock and disgust. She didn’t know which emotion she was feeling more strongly at the moment.
“Why not? She always turned her nose up at me when we dated. She always thought she was better than me and tried to break us up so many times. Why the fuck should I care about that bitch?” He questioned with a hard stare.
“For me! I know you obviously never loved me, but if you ever cared about me, you wouldn’t do it,” she challenged him.
“Hmm. I guess I can decide not to do it but only if you give me something in return,” he said while giving her a suggestive look.
“Like what?” She asked wearily, hoping it wasn’t what she thought it was.
He looked up and down her throat lustfully. He then reached out and held up her chin with his fingers, with his eyes settling down at her lips.
“A nice, hot blowjob for old time’s sake would be great,” he suggested. ‘Get her on her knees. I’ve been waiting to fuck that sweet little mouth of hers and she wouldn’t be able to scream,’ a line from one of the bikers flashed through her mind. A memory she had conveniently forgotten until now.
Her hand flew up, and she would have been able to smack the shit out of Owen if he didn’t grab her wrist in time. With a growl, she shoved his hand away with her other hand.
“Never. You’re really are on coke if you think I will ever fuck you or anything near that again,” she snarled. He let out a deep chuckle.
“Oh please. Don’t act so virginal, Mare, when you just told your whole English class that you got fucked and played by the school nutjob,” he teased.
“Don’t talk about Eli, I never fucked him,” she growled, gritting her teeth at the thought of him.
“Oh so you sucked him off because that’s the only other thing that happens in a hookup,” Owen said with a sneer, “You really lowered yourself standards, huh? From me to a Charles Manson wannabe. If you were so willing to blow that freak, I don’t see why giving me a sloppy suck again would be so bad, right? You used to enjoy doing it after all,” He said as he reached and ran his fingers through her hair.
“Owen stop,” she ordered as a nauseous feeling grew inside of her. She only enjoyed giving him oral because it made him happy, and he demanded it all of the time. He would make her do it before his football game, after his football game, at parties, on his couch at his house, whenever he was in a bad mood, whenever he was feeling “stressed”, or whenever he was in a good mood. Her jaw would hurt so bad after a while and he didn’t seem to care at all. And he never returned the favor because going down on a girl wasn’t manly in his eyes. He treated her like his own personal pet that was meant to serve only him with no expectations of him reciprocating.
“You used to be so bad at it the first couple of times, but soon you became a pro at it. It was like your mouth was made for my dick,” Owen continued with a predatory smile, “Nothing would get me more pumped for a game then you on your knees afterwards. The other guys on the team were so jealous of me....”
“Fucking shut up,” she snarled but he didn’t. Now his eyes were traveling all down her body, and she watched in disgust as he licked his lips.
“Why should I? It’s the truth, and it’s not just the head that was amazing but the sex too. You know what? Mmm....that sexy mouth of yours won’t be enough. I’m going to need you to fuck me again,” he continued, giving her a twisted smile.
“No. Go to hell,” she strongly rejected him. The thought alone made her want to vomit. That was a chapter in her life that she never wanted to reopen. She didn’t understand WHY he was bothering her with this when he could have been bothering Anya instead.
“Why not? You were the best I ever had, and we always had so much fun. I miss the sex and I know you miss it too. We were great,” he argued.
“You lied to me and told me you were a virgin the first time we had sex. You cheated on me multiple times even when I fucked you as many times as you wanted. You never stood up for me whenever Fitz and Bianca made fun of me, and you laughed every time Fitz joked about you sharing me even when it made me uncomfortable. You never listened to anything I had to say unless it involved either kissing your ass or having sex with you. You tried to get me to dump Katie. I would rather die than fuck you ever again,” she declared.
“Mare, I was the first guy to ever have you, and we’ll always have a special connection because of that. You can’t stay away from me. You will always come back to me,” he replied with a smug smile.
“No!” she shouted.
“Then I guess Katie’s getting outed as a purge princess,” he replied with a shrug. Her heart started beating in fear. The mere mention of her eating disorder could cause Katie to relapse and she couldn’t imagine the turmoil that would cause.
“Owen please...,” she begged, “I’ll do anything else.”
“I’m sorry, Mare but I only want one thing. You have until tomorrow to think it over before the debate. When you do make the right decision for your best friend, I want you to wear your little cheerleader uniform, red lipstick, and those red heels I bought you that I know you still have,” he whispered in her ear. He then slapped her behind before leaving the gym. That also triggered some awful memories of the bikers groping her.
Marisol was then all by herself in the gym. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she let out a quiet sob. She was probably going to end up doing it for Katie and she hated herself for it. She always kept coming back to Owen even though he wouldn’t stop treating her like shit. He had a toxic pull on her. Katie used to try to tell her in a nice way that it was a problem. She hated to admit it but she was positive Owen was her first love and that’s why she kept taking him back.
Now, it was biting her in the ass. Owen used her up like a candy bar wrapper multiple times and she was going to allow him to do it again if only to protect her best friend. Her other boyfriends used her too and even Eli had only wanted her for a hookup. It hurt more than anything because he seemed different from the rest and she was finally in love again for the first time in a long time.
Her recent sexual assault at Little Miss Steaks wouldn’t stop crossing her mind. It probably never will at this point, not with the ultimatum Owen pulled on her. He knew she would never willingly have sex with him again and so he pulled the ultimate trump card. She hated him more than anything in the world.
Her body didn’t feel like her own anymore. It didn’t feel safe at all, and it was no longer her temple.
Her mind was numb when she finally left the gym.
“Vote for Katie Matlin for school president!” Eli yelled out as he handed out buttons to random kids walking past him and Drew. “Vote for Katie Matlin for school president,” he said to Fiona as she grabbed the button with an amused look on her face.
“Look at campaign manager Mr. Goldsworthy,” she teased as she stopped to look at him.
“Don’t get used to it,” he dryly replied.
“You really go all out for a girl,” she told him with a giggle as she walked away. He rolled his eyes. He would never live these days down.
“Katie is going to smash this election. She has nearly the support of the entire school. I can’t wait to address her as Madam President,” Drew gushed with a dreamy look in his eyes. Eli rolled his eyes again. He not only had to put his self esteem aside to campaign for Katie, but he had to deal with Adam’s dumbass step-brother too who wouldn’t stop singing praises about Katie. He was still uncomfortable by that conversation that they held at Marisol’s party.
“She’s just the perfect girl and what I need right now. Strong, confident, mature, and drop dead gorgeous,” Drew continued as he handed out stickers to everyone.
“When’s the engagement?” Eli asked in jest.
“Don’t know yet, but as for now we’re happily together,” Drew bantered.
“Congratulations,” Eli replied flatly but the other guy didn’t seem to mind. Just then Marisol came by to check up on them. Eli was immediately alarmed by how red her eyes were, was she crying?
“I see you guys are doing a great job. Thanks,” she told them while nodding stiffly.
“Are you okay?” Eli asked her in concern.
“I’m fine,” she dismissed quickly.
“Are you sure? You look like something bad happened to you,” Drew pointed out with a frown.
“I’m fine,” she repeated more sharply. “Tomorrow, we should have more t-shirts ready to give out. With the positive buzz Katie is getting, we should run out of them quickly,” she stated, and it looked like she was about to start sniffing.
“Great. I heard Owen is running now. As his teammate, I gotta say he wouldn’t be a good fit,” Drew said.
She growled at the mention of his name, and Eli got suspicious. “He absolutely would not and I dated the guy,” she replied sharply.
“He only cares about hockey and girls. Not to mention he’s kinda not a lovable person,” Drew added. That was the understatement of the year.
“I don’t want to talk about him right now or ever. For now, keep handing out buttons and stickers,” Marisol ordered firmly before walking off.
Eli looked at her retreating figure in worry and he saw that Drew did too.
Whatever was going on with Mare, he was going to put a stop to it even if he wasn’t her favorite person right now.
Later that night
Red.
As weird as it sounded, she could not stand the color except for the shades that were more pink in color. She especially hated that fluorescent shade of red that she had to wear every day as part of her uniform. It was a tacky color. Unfortunately Owen loved that shade of red.
Marisol wanted to die inside as she painted her fingernails and toenails with that color. She also picked out the red pair of bra and panties that were his favorite and that he would definitely want her to wear.
She couldn’t believe she was actually doing this. She was going to sleep with Owen again because he forced her hand. The thought of him inside of her made her ill. She wanted to start crying again in dread, but she felt she didn’t have any more tears left inside, at least for tonight.
She didn’t want to have sex for a long time after what happened with those bikers and Eli. Sex made her very uncomfortable, and now she was being forced to have it. She not only was being coerced into having sex with Owen but she had to dress how he wanted her to dress too. It was disgusting. She was already feeling disgusting and it wasn’t even happening yet.
As she waited for her nails to dry, she looked at the toy bunny Eli bought her. She named the bunny Snuggles, as she felt at the time that hugging it felt like she was hugging her “prince”. She was an idiot. She almost threw it in the trash after the play fiasco but it was too adorable to look at despite the bad memories. He wouldn’t ruin Snuggles for her.
For some reason, looking at the bunny made her feel even worse for what she was about to do tomorrow.