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Staring up at the ceiling, Kakashi tried desperately to will himself back to sleep. To make his heart stop pounding in his chest, forget the nightmares, close his eyes, and just sleep.
Every time he closed his eyes though, it was there again. The giant beast that haunted his dreams, roaring and spewing fire from its mouth.
Angry red eyes staring deep into his soul.
“Damn it,” throwing his blanket off of himself, Kakashi sat up and threw his legs over the edge of his bed. “Waste of my time.”
Clambering out of bed he made his way towards the window, determined to get as far away from his nightmares as possible. As if removing himself from his small apartment would save him from having to see those bright angry eyes.
Once he had made his escape from the room, he ran for it. Heading to the only place he could think of at this hour of the night, determined to at least enjoy himself a little while he was awake.
It didn’t take long to reach his favorite spot atop the sushi shop. A place he knew he wouldn’t be bothered by judgemental villagers or mosey teammates. Not that anyone would be awake at this house.
Collapsing against the hard surface, he stared up at the night sky. Full of stars and a bright half moon hanging over top him.
“One night,” speaking to himself, he searched the night sky for consolations hidden away in the stars. “I just want one night of rest.”
Without having to be exhausted from training, or too tired from not sleeping properly for a week.
Just one night where he got to sleep without the nightmares.
Without having to face the monster inside of him. Th beast that everyone in the villages feared so much that they hated Kakashi for simply existing with it sealed inside of him.
“Is that so much to ask?” Spotting a collection of stars, he decided to try and form a shape out of them. Huffing when all he could see were those angry red eyes staring back at him even from the night sky.
As if it were everywhere.
A constant presence he could never escape.
“I didn’t ask for this stupid thing to be inside of me,” he whispered to himself. “I don’t want it here. Why…”
Turning his head to the side, he stared at large empty eyes. A familiar sight that he had gotten used to over the years.
“Why me?” He asked as if the stone face would give him an answer. “Why couldn’t it have been someone else, old man?”
Silence. The only response he ever got whenever he tried to talk to the giant stone monument.
“I would have rather had parents.” turning his eyes back towards the sky, he searched the stars desperately for a face. A kind smile. Arms open and ready to embrace him in a hug.
The night sky was beautiful. Full of sparkling stars and a calm that helped to settle his nerves.
But as beautiful as it was, it wasn’t what he wanted.
It didn’t say ‘welcome home’ or ‘I love you’
It was just a night sky, and that was all it would ever be.