Remember Me

by ravenkru

Summary:

Raven wakes up in a hospital, with no memories at all. She can't remember anything about her life, not her best friends, not her own name, and most certainly not how she got in a car accident.

Murphy doesn't want to remember. He doesn't want to remember that he's the cause for Raven's accident, even if his friends insist he's not. It doesn't matter. He will always live with this, whether Raven starts to remember again or not.

Or, Raven gets amnesia, Murphy blames himself, and they fall in love (whether Murphy wants to or not).

Notes:

Hey y'all! I got this idea a little while ago and decided to turn it into a murven fic. This first chapter's a little short, but the next ones will probably be longer. I plan to update each week, and there will probably be around 15 chapters. Enjoy!

Chapter 1: Flashes

Flashes.

Light.

So very, very bright.

And then she is awake, panting for breath, her eyes flying open.

Looking around, she realizes she’s in a hospital, which makes no sense because why would she-

She.

She.

Who is she?

Fear.

Worry.

All she can do is think in primitive human instincts, trapped in her own mind by the lack of her memories, the lack of any life before she woke up.

Her head feels very empty.

Then a doctor enters, heading straight to her side.

“Miss, please calm down.”

His voice is soothing, calm, and she allows herself to close her eyes, taking a deep breath before opening them again.

“I am Dr. Nyko.” He says.

A laugh slips out without her realizing. “Weird name, Doc.”

Nyko doesn’t react, still staring at her. “Do you remember yours?”

She can’t do anything but stare numbly back at him.

Who is she?

“Raven Reyes.” Nyko says, and she look at him in confusion. “That’s your name.”

Huh. She- Raven- mulls the name over. “Raven.” It’s a pretty name, and even gives her a signature mark.

A flash.

Then she sees the outline of a bird, a raven, on a piece of a paper.

Another flash, and Raven’s back in the hospital room.

Nyko is peering curiously at her. “Miss Reyes, you seem to be experiencing amnesia as a result of your head injury.”

“Head injury?”

“From your car accident.”

“I was in a car accident?”

“Yes. It’s also why your leg is in a brace.”

Raven looks down, and sees a hunk of metal holding onto one of her legs. “How come I can’t feel it?”

“We numbed the area before operating, but…” Nyko look nervous, a stark contrast from his usual calm demeanor.

“Just give it to me straight, Doc.” Raven says. ‘I’m a big girl. I can handle it.”

“It is possible that you wouldn’t be able to feel anything in that area regardless of how much anesthesia we gave you. You would be able to walk, but only with the assist of the brace.”

Raven sucks in a breath, taking in this new information.

Nyko pats her hand, but somehow the gesture doesn’t feel patronizing. “I think you might want to talk to people you know better right now.”

She wants to tell him that she doesn’t know anybody, doesn’t remember anything, but he’s already left the room, and now others are coming in.

First a dark-haired older man, and then a tall curly-haired younger man and a short blonde woman.

Raven wonders who they are.

The younger people hang back, studying her nervously, but the older man rushes forward, embracing Raven tightly before she can even blink.

“My brave, brave girl.” He whispers, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

Raven feels weird, a combination of the obvious intimacy of the gesture and the fact that she feels like she’s experienced this before, and so she pulls back, tilting her head.

“Who’re you?”

The man’s face falls, but he quickly pulls back into a smile. “Jacopo Sinclair, but you call me Sinclair. I’m…” He hesitates, before continuing. “I’m your adoptive father.”

Oh.

Oh.

Raven wonders what happened to her biological parents, but decides that’s something she can learn later.

“Raven Reyes.” She replies. “Nice to meet you.”

Sinclair smiles at this, then sits down next to her, content with holding her hand in silence.

Raven turns to the other people in the room. “Are you guys my siblings?”

They both laugh at this, shaking their heads. The blonde speaks first. “Definitely not.” As the two draw closer, Raven sees the matching bands on their ring fingers.

“I’m Clarke. Clarke Griffin.”

“Bellamy Blake.” The man says.

“You’re, uh, my best friend. The maid of honor at our wedding, the first person I ever told about this little one.” Clarke rubs her barely swelling stomach, smiling softly.

Raven just feels uncomfortable. These people obviously care about her so much, but she knows absolutely nothing about them.

Or her, for that matter.

“Well, why don’t we fix that?” Bellamy says, and Raven realizes she’s voiced the last part out loud. They don’t seem to mind though, and Raven feels lucky that she knows these people, even though she doesn’t have any memories with them.

Together, Bellamy, Clarke, and Sinclair help fill in some key details about her life, and by the time Clarke and Bellamy have to leave, she’s managed to learn a lot about her life.

Her name is Raven Reyes.

She is twenty six years old.

She lives in Arkadia, Virginia.

She works at Franko Tech as a mechanical engineer.

She graduated from Ark University, where most of their friends are from, who Bellamy promises Raven will see soon.

She and Clarke met because they were apparently both dating the same guy, neither realizing the other existed. Raven thinks this is probably the funniest way to start a friendship that she can think of.

By the time they’re done talking, Raven’s head feels a lot less empty.

∞

Flashes.

Light.

So very, very bright.

And then he is awake, panting for breath, his eyes flying open.

Murphy sits up straight in bed, pressing one hand to his cheek and realizing he’s been crying in his sleep.

He looks over at his bedstand, seeing his phone blinking brightly. A text message from Clarke. Two hours ago.

She’s awake.

Holy shit.

Immediately he calls her. On the second ring, Clarke picks up, her voice scratchy from tiredness.

“She has a brace on her leg, can’t walk without it.”

Murphy lets out a breath, tears welling up in his eyes again as he leans against the headboard. Four days. Four days since Raven was placed in a coma.

How is he supposed to live with himself after what he did?

“Is…Is she feeling okay?”

“Yeah, she’s dosed up on painkillers, but…” Clarke sighs, and hears a muffled noise which he assumes is her talking to Bellamy. “Murph, she doesn’t remember.”

“What?”

“Raven doesn’t remember anything, Murphy. Not the accident, not us, not Sinclair, not even her own name.”

He takes in this information, trying to make it make sense. Raven is the smartest out of all of them, and now she can’t remember her own life?

This is all his fault.

“Murphy, I’m gonna re-introduce her to the rest of us next D-Day, okay? Please…just be there.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I know.” Murphy says, then hangs up before Clarke can say anything else. He knows she’s just trying to help, but he doesn’t need it. Raven does.

Raven did, and he didn’t help her.

Murphy wonders if he will even be able to look her in the eyes.

Chapter 2: D-Day

Summary:

Raven meets Murphy (again).

Notes:

Sorry for the long wait on this chapter!

Oh my gosh, the response on this story has been astounding, thank you guys so much for all your sweet words! I hope you continue to enjoy :D

The next few days go by in a blur. Sinclair stays over almost every night, only going home when Raven insists that he should get proper sleep in a bed instead of the undoubtedly uncomfortable hospital chairs.

Clarke and Bellamy visit a few times too, but Clarke more often. Bellamy’s a teacher at the local high school, meaning he’s always super busy, and Clarke works at the hospital, making it easier for her to stop by.

Raven also gets a physical therapist to help with her leg, by the name of Luna, a calm, twenty-something woman who’s a fan of classical music and meditation. Raven expects that she’ll find this super boring, but for some reason, it actually works.

Finally, after a week of lazing around in her hospital room, Dr. Nyko gives the go ahead, and Raven moves back to Sinclair’s house. She’s glad he offered, because she’s sure her place would feel even more foreign and isolating. The house is beautiful, on the outskirts of Arkadia, and Sinclair’s mechanic shop is attached to it. Raven starts working there, at least until her medical leave gets over, and something about the familiar smell of grease and repairing people’s engines makes her feel better.

She’s been able to recall some hazy memories, but none have people in them. The most familiar visions are of the raven sketch and the underside of someone’s car. Raven supposes she’s just remembering things that are prompted by whatever she’s doing at the moment, but she’s really starting to wish for some actual memories of her life.

She’s thinking about this as she fixes a loose panel under someone’s car when Clarke comes over.

“Raven?” She hears the now familiar voice call.

Rolling out from underneath the car, she looks up, spotting golden hair.

“God, you’re covered in grease.” Clarke laughs. “You always were back in high school.”

“We went to high school together?” Raven’s been under the impression that they met in college.

“Well, we did, but I didn’t know you back then. Bellamy did though, you guys were close, and when he wasn’t at his house he was usually here, chatting with you during your shift.”

Of course the princess would meet her true love in high school, Raven smiles to herself. Then her vision turns fuzzy, and she hears an unfamiliar voice say in the back of her head ‘the princess and her king’. It’s deep, a male’s. She has absolutely no idea whose it is.

“Woah, Rave, you okay?’ Raven blinks, finding Clarke’s big blue eyes staring concernedly back at her, one hand resting on her shoulder.

“What? Yeah, yeah, I’m okay.” She tries to focus, but her mind keeps going back to the voice. It’s her first vaguely people-related memory she’s seen…maybe Clarke will know what it means. “Clarke, do people call you princess? And maybe… Bellamy, king?”

Clarke tilts her head, thinking. “Well, princess is Bell’s nickname for me, and…” She pauses, scrunching up her nose. “Our ex coined the name. But I only think of Bellamy when I hear it.” She smiles dopily at this, and Raven resists a familiar impulse to snark about how adorable they are. “I don’t know if anyone’s called Bell ‘king’, though. That would be kinda a weird nickname.”

Raven nods, still thinking about the voice. Clarke grabs her toolbox for her, and she begins putting her stuff away. “I’m starting to regain some memories, I think.”

Clarke’s face breaks into a grin. “Really? What memories? Do you think you’ll be able to remember completely soon?”

“Uh, nothing with people in them, so I don’t know. I heard some guy’s voice say ‘the princess and her king’ just now, that’s why I asked.”

Clarke simply nods, but Raven doesn’t miss how the corners of her mouth turn just slightly downwards. Is it weird to feel insecure about herself in that way? Clarke clearly wants the old Raven back, the one who remembers, but technically she’s still here.

Isn’t she?

“Hey, so, I came over to ask about D-Day tonight.” Clarke says.

“D-Day?”

“Delinquents Day. Jasper named it. It’s a tradition in our friend group, every Wednesday night we meet up. Me and Bell are hosting tonight.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Clarke looks at her intently, then nods. “I’ll come pick you up at 7.”

Raven smiles back at her, then returns her attention to her toolbox. She’s excited to meet these people, her friends. But she can’t shake a feeling of uncertainty.

She asks Sinclair what he thinks later. Over the past few days, they’ve fallen into a comfortable dynamic. It’s weird having a father which she remembers nothing about, but Sinclair feels safe and familiar. It’s easy for Raven to talk to him.

“So, you’re insecure because you think your friends wish you were the old Raven?” He asks.

“Basically.” Raven shrugs, realizing how stupid that sounds now out loud.

Sinclair chuckles. “Well, first of all, there is no ‘old Raven’. You’re still you.”

“Except I’m not me. I don’t even know what my real personality is.”

“Raven.” She looks up to see Sinclair raising his eyebrows at her. “Let go. Have fun. You’re not supposed to be some great philosopher.”

“I know.” Raven pauses, then adds in a small voice, “I just want them to like me.”

“They will like you. They love you.” Sinclair says, and he seems so sure of himself that Raven can’t help but nod in response.

She’s not exactly sure what to expect when she walks into Clarke’s home. Clarke’s a doctor and probably makes a ton of money, so of course it’s huge, but somehow it still feels homey, with Bellamy’s papers randomly scattered around the house and Clarke’s paintings over all the walls.

They enter the kitchen, and suddenly Raven is the center of everyone’s focus. She counts nine people, not including Bellamy and Clarke or a small baby, who must all be supermodels, because, wow, she has attractive friends.

A guy with goggles on his head is the first one to break the silence, a huge grin breaking over his face. Raven feels a rush of affection for him. “Rave! You’re home!”

Home.

A strange word to describe this, but comforting, nonetheless. The man wraps her up in a hug, then pulls back. “I’m Jasper, by the way. Probably should have said that first.”

Raven laughs, and it’s enough to break the others out of their reverie. She goes through introductions with the others, learning that a short, smiling guy named Monty, and a pretty, dark-haired girl named Emori works with her at Franko Tech. She’s starting work on Monday, so its nice to know she won’t go in completely blind.

Still, Raven feels out of balance amongst her friends- they’re all incredibly amazing people…she just can’t talk to them about much, considering her life technically started a week ago. Hopefully, once work starts and she has actual life experiences, Raven will be able to better fit in.

∞

The next few days go by in a blur. Working at the restaurant takes up a lot of Murphy time, meaning that he doesn’t have to think about Raven. On Monday, Emori manages to coax him out for dinner, insisting that he can’t distance himself. Murphy just feels weird relying on his ex for comfort. Still, Mori’s always been a good listener, and she’s a close friend to both Murphy and Raven.

“So you wanna tell me why you’ve been torturing yourself?” Emori says, sipping at her wine glass.

Murphy sighs. “It is my fault. I was supposed to be there for her.”

“John.” Emori stares at him. “You didn’t cause the accident.”

“It feels like I did.”

Emori groans. “Even if you feel that way, it’s still important to be there for Raven.”

“What if she sees me and remembers?” Murphy shuts his eyes tightly, then opens them again. “What if she starts to hate me?”

Emori gives him a sad smile. “If Raven can see Clarke and not remember anything, she definitely won’t start because of you.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“No. It’s not.” Emori places her hand over his, squeezing gently. “John, Raven needs all of us to be there for her. Even if she did remember, she wouldn’t want you to wallow in self-pity.”

Murphy swallows, then nods slightly. Emori leans back in her chair, tilting her head. “Good. Now show up to D-Day, or I’ll kill you.”

“I don’t know why I’m friends with you.”

“Please. You’d die without me.”

That much is true, Murphy thinks to himself. Though he can’t help but wonder about the other person he can’t live without.

The minute he walks into Clarke and Bellamy’s house, he knows this is a bad idea. It’s a Jasper plan, which means that Bellamy needs to be distracted, otherwise he’ll ultimately disapprove. Octavia seems to have taken charge of this, as she’s on the couch, purposely annoying Bellamy by pretending to be mad at Clarke. It’s an extremely effective distraction, because if Bellamy were a cartoon character, right now he would have smoke coming out of his ears, judging by how loudly he’s yelling about how perfect Clarke is.

Meanwhile, Echo, Emori, Miller and Lincoln are flitting around the kitchen, setting up decorations. Jasper’s putting up a huge banner over the cabinets, which reads “WELCOME BACK RAVEN!” in sparkly pink font. Monty’s setting up a moonshine still on the counter. The only person who’s not helping is Harper, who’s bouncing Jordan around in her lap. Even the baby is watching everything intently, his eyes glazed over with what Murphy assumes is excitement. Of course, Jordan makes the same look when he’s just been fed, so it could also be that.

Miller’s the first to notice him, coming over and clapping him on the back. “Good you could make it, Murph.”

Murphy nods, looking around. “This nice. I’m sure Raven will appreciate it.”

Unless her amnesia caused a complete personality transplant, there’s no way hell the Reyes he knows will like it. There’s just too much glitter.

Murphy keeps these thoughts to himself, though Echo shoots him a look of pure disgust, obviously thinking the same thing. It makes him laugh, and with a jolt, Murphy realizes it’s the first time he’s laughed all week long.

Emori was right. Just being here with his friends is already helping improve his mood.

Finally, they hear the garage open, and with a sense of building anticipation, Clarke enters, and then…her.

The first thing Murphy notices, which has become a usual reaction in the past few months, is how beautiful Raven is.

The second thing he notices is her brace.

He gulps hard, averting his eyes. Even if the accident wasn’t Murphy’s fault, that definitely was.

That definitely is.

A creak of metal resonates in the back of his head, the sound familiar from his nightmares.

Jasper breaks the silence first, introducing himself, and then everyone is. Murphy introduces himself, very briefly, not being able to work up the courage to have an actual conversation with her.

After an hour, however, he is, and he sits next to Raven on the sofa. She looks at him, smiling, and Murphy feels slightly disoriented. “Hi, I’m Murphy.”

She lets out a bright peal of laughter. “Yeah, you said that already.”

“Oh. Right.” Murphy scratches his head, feeling vaguely embarrassed.

“So how do I know you, Murphy?”

“Uh, from college. I was Bellamy’s roommate.”

“And I was Clarke’s right? Did we set them up?”

Murphy smiles. “No, but that would have been cool. I was still an ass back then.”

Raven takes a sip of her drink, then asks, “Who’s to say you aren’t one now?”

There’s the Raven he knows.

“Should have been a comedian, Reyes.” He good naturedly rolls his eyes. “How are you adjusting?” He stumbles over the question, glancing at her brace.

Raven looks down, as if she’s just noticed. “Oh. Yeah, that.”

“That?”

“It’s just…” Raven pauses. “I mean, I can’t remember a time without it, so the pain doesn’t feel as bad as it should. It is a bother just getting around, though.”

Murphy nods. At least it isn’t really hurting her. That should be a comfort, he thinks. But it doesn’t feel like one.

Raven continues talking. “I just hate that I can’t remember anything at all. Not even the stupid accident that caused this mess.”

“Would you really want to remember that, though?” Murphy adds in, hastily.

Raven shrugs. “I guess not. It’s just weird, you know? I feel like everyone’s expecting me to be someone, and I’m expecting it too, but it’s just not…” She trails off, staring into space.

“Coming fast enough? The remembering?” Murphy fills in, and Raven grins at him, nodding.

“You’re like, the only person who’s ever gotten what I’m about.” Raven says, and then her face scrunches up. “That’s from Freaks and Geeks, right? It feels familiar.”

Murphy’s face breaks into a real smile at this. “We watched that together.”

“Did we?” Raven tilts her head. “Seems I’m starting to remember some stuff.”

Remembering is good, Murphy tells himself. As long as she doesn’t remember other stuff. The bad stuff.

Notes:

Next up: Raven starts work again. Murphy starts to feel better.

I feel as though I should mention that I didn't do any research for this story, so my interpretation for Raven's amnesia is completely artistic license. Basically she can't remember any memories relating specifically to people in her life, but she remembers information/skill based stuff, like knowing how to tie her shoes or repair engines.

Comments and kudos are much appreciated!

Chapter 3: A New Normal

Summary:

Raven starts work and has an unpleasant experience. Echo offers Murphy some important insights.

Notes:

So... I kinda sorta had an unnoffical hiatus on this fic.
Sorry about that.
Anyways, I've been struggling with this chapter so long because I wasn't exactly sure what to put in it? I ended up moving some plot points around, so this is the last sort of set-up chapter in the fic. I had also been struggling with motivation, but then yesterday I basically watched Murven edits for two hours and my favorite author commented on my Tumblr, so I guess that was what I needed!
Heads up, two canon characters are presented badly in here. I'm sorry about Roan, not so sorry about Wick :/
I'm pretty proud of how this turned out, and I hope you enjoy too :D

As it turns out, a lot changes after a car accident.

Especially one that causes total memory loss.

For one, while Raven can remember the basics of how to drive- the signs, which buttons do what, she doesn’t have any memory of driving on Arkadia’s roads.

She debates doing the work commute herself, but then ultimately gives in to carpooling with Emori and Monty.

Monty is quiet, smiling patiently as Emori chatters on about her neighbor, Nelson, and how pretty Echo’s new dress is. He’s got a picture of Harper and their son stuck to the windshield, and soft music plays from the car’s speakers.

Raven is content to just listen. It feels nice- normal.

Whoever her past self was, they must have been pretty good to have friends like these.

The spell is broken when she finds her desk, and next to her, a man with sandy-blonde hair swivels around in his chair to face her.

“Wrench monkey, what’s up? Heard you had a pretty bad accident. That sucks.” He drags out the last word.

Raven’s not sure what it is- muscle memory, maybe- but immediately her shoulders stiffen. “I’m sorry, who are-“

“Wick. You can call me Kyle,” The man says, winking, and Raven tries to control the shudder that runs through her body. “I’m your favorite coworker, sweetheart.”

She narrows her eyes, pointing to the placard on his desk. “That says Junior Mechanical Engineer, actually. I think that means I’m your boss, sweetheart.”

Wick shrugs, and Raven suppresses the urge to roll her eyes. Who the hell is this guy?

“Anyways, is it true you lost your memory? Don’t tell me you forgot about all those nights we spent together, Reyes.”

At this she stands up, glaring at Wick. Screw her past self. How could she be so stupid to date this douchebag? “This is a working environment. If you think you can use my medical injury to slack off work, you’re wrong, and I’m sure a supervisor would be happy to back me up on that.”

At this Wick relents, holding up his hands in mock surrender, and Raven turns her attention back to her work. She manages to figure out what’s going on- mostly it’s just a lot of paperwork to fill out, and also successfully ignores Wick for the rest of the day.

At the end of the workday, Emori meets her at her desk.

“So? How was your first day?”

“You forgot to tell me about Wick.”

Emori winces. “I’m sorry.”

Raven shakes her head, slinging her bag over her shoulder and standing up. “Did I really date him?”

“Unfortunately. Don’t worry, you came to your senses after like two months.”

She sighs. “Please tell me that’s the only jerk I dated.”

“Um, well, you know…” Emori rubs the back of her neck. “You haven’t had the best experiences with relationships.”

Raven narrows her eyes, but doesn’t press, figuring that whole mess can be learned about later. “Well, how was your day?”

Emori shrugs. “It’s work. Not much to talk about.”

Her aloof demeanor is a stark difference from the chatty girl this morning. “What’s wrong? Is there something bothering you?”

Emori’s eyes widen as she plasters on a fake smile. “What? Me? No, I’m fine. Nothing is-“

Abruptly, the grin drops off her face, and the girl glances sideways, as if someone in the completely empty office will overhear them. “Okay, well, don’t repeat this, but I think Echo’s boyfriend is bad news.”

Raven is quickly figuring out Echo is one of Emori’s favorite topics of conversation.

“They were on and off in college, you know? And now she says he’ll stick around this time. Roan was terrible to her. Terrible. As if college wasn’t hard enough for all of us already.”

This piques Raven’s attention. “Wait, what? I thought college was… fun, didn’t we all meet there or something?”

Emori looks at her, twisting her lips. “We did, yeah, but there was a lot of other stuff going on. Too much drama. I mean, you and Clarke were always fighting, for one.”

“We were?”

“You guys had a very tumultuous friendship those first few years, to say the least. Probably ‘cause of Finn. I’m so glad he’s gone now.”

“Finn?”

With this, Emori seems to realize she’s talked too much, and changes the subject. “Anyways, enough about that. How was D-Day? Did you like…your friends?”

Raven laughs at this, though their previous conversations still lingers in her mind. “Yeah, it was fun. We have nice friends.”

Emori grins widely. “Well, maybe you should meet up with some of them. Could help you start remembering.”

Raven considers this, as they walk towards the exit. It would be nice to spend some time with some of her friends. She certainly enjoys Clarke, Monty, and Emori’s company. Maybe Bellamy will want to do something. Or Echo.

She recalls D-Day. While mostly it had been a blur of new (old?) people, she did have a lot of fun. Remembering the conversation she had with Murphy, she decides to text him first.

Was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?

The little notification under the text bubble pops up immediately, letting her know that Murphy’s seen the message, and Raven feels a strange sense of uncertainty mixed with a feeling she can’t identify.

Whatever it is, she’s sure this is a good idea.

Remembering won’t kill her, Raven reminds herself, and puts the phone away.

∞

As it turns out, a lot changes after a car accident.

There’s legal stuff that has to be finalized, there’s the unfamiliar blue letters from the hospital confirming bill payments, and then, of course, there’s the uneasy feeling Murphy gets whenever he steps into a car.

He wonders how much of that feeling comes from the fact he still hasn’t told Raven.

So far, their friends and family have been walking on eggshells when it comes to talking about the accident, but Murphy doubts they even have much to go on. The only people who know what happened that night are him and some deep recesses of what’s left of Raven’s memory.

But what even is he supposed to tell her? What if she wants more information than just ‘Hey, I was in that accident too’?

Murphy’s no therapist, but he’s pretty sure revisiting the exact details would be as psychologically upsetting for him as it would be for Raven.

This is what he’s thinking about when Echo and Bellamy walk into the bar, taking seats in front of him. It’s been a pretty long day, since he volunteered to take extra shifts in the early afternoon, so he’s glad to see his friends.

It still takes Murphy a second to catch up with how comfortable they are with each other. No hard feelings, even after breaking off a relationship that lasted several years. Still, this is how it’s always been in their friend group. Romances ending easily. The only ones that went down badly were Murphy and Emori, and…

Well, all of Raven’s relationships.

“Scotch, on the rocks.” Bellamy says, and Murphy gives him a disapproving look. “Oh don’t give me that face. Tomorrow’s off for the kids, I don’t have work.”

Echo laughs. “I’ll have a Manhattan.”

Since Echo has the highest alcohol tolerance out of all their friends, Murphy’s not particularly worried about her. Still, as he starts to make their drinks, he can’t help but glance at Bellamy, who’s wearing a particularly forlorn look on his face.

Echo’s noticed it too. “You okay, Bell?”

Bellamy looks up, startled, then sighs. “Just worried about Raven.”

Murphy sucks in a breath as his feet start tapping in nervousness.

“Me too.” Echo replies. “I can’t possibly imagine what this must be like for her.”

Bellamy nods at her, then swallows heavily. “I just- she can’t remember anything.”

His voice cracks on the last word, and with a start Murphy realizes his friend is crying.

Echo’s eyes widen too as tears start to stream down Bellamy’s cheeks. Nobody else in the room is reacting- it’s not like a grown man crying in a bar is an uncommon sight- but the only time Murphy’s ever seen Bellamy cry is after a really bad fight with Octavia.

Bellamy continues, his voice breaking. “Raven’s my best friend, you know? My oldest friend. We were inseparable in high school. Now she doesn’t even remember meeting me.”

“Clarke said Raven’s starting to regain some of her memories, maybe she’ll remember all of it again,” Murphy offers weakly.

The other man nods, falling silent. Tension hangs in the air between them, Echo twirling her straw in nervousness and Murphy scrubbing vigorously at the bar top with a towel.

Bellamy downs the rest of his drink, then stands up. “I’m gonna call a taxi. See you guys on D-Day.”

With that, their friend is gone, Murphy staring after him.

“You should talk to Raven, you know.” Echo says, directing a piercing stare at Murphy.

He turns away, reorganizing the already perfect back bar. “I did. Last D-Day.”

“You know what I mean. Actually talk to her. Only reason Sinclair or Clarke haven’t is because they’re waiting for you.”

“I know.” It comes out harshly, even though Murphy has no need to defend himself. Echo remains unperturbed, but even without turning around, he can feel a cold demeanor slip over her.

They’re quite similar in some ways, the ice queen and the cockroach. Both trying to protect themselves, even if it means they harm others.

He turns around to find Echo standing up. She looks at him, hazel eyes studying him carefully. “Octavia knows a good therapist, if you ever want to talk to someone.”

Murphy’s phone vibrates in his pocket, and he pulls it out, checking it quickly.

One unread message from Raven Reyes.

Was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?

Echo sees it too, and gives him a close-lipped smile.

“Remembering won’t kill you, Murphy. Just…try.”

Notes:

NEXT UP: Murven's first official hangout sesh!

I'm going to start incorporating flashbacks in the next chapters, so just a heads up- their college years (and Raven's life in general) was super super messy.

Comments and kudos are always appreciated! Come chat with me on Tumblr!