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Stella has never had a sleepover. She had no friends before, none before school, and after what happened to Ricki, it's not like anyone wanted to approach her. She clung to Sky, he seemed like the only thing she had, the only person who didn't look at her with disgust or fear in their eyes. But then Bloom came to school, clumsy, always in trouble, and she gave this to her. This little family of girls she would never have made friends with if it weren't for the redhead.
She would never be able to put into words how thankful she was to Bloom and it was so pleasant to see her back with her parents. Something tingled under Stella's skin, she obviously could never have that, but she was just glad for her. Something she hadn't felt in a long time. And Bloom's mother was truly kind, as was her father. She would like to have a family like that, she would give the castle, the jewelry, the money, the fame, just to be able to have the kind of affection that Bloom's mother had in her eyes when she looked at her daughter.
"Are you okay?" It's Musa who nudges her side, probably because she has read some slightly melancholy emotion in her.
"I'm fine." She has to remind herself not to be too harsh. "Thanks." She adds then, a low smile twitching in her mouth. Musa smiled back and then leaned over to pick up a card, it was her turn. Playing "Heads up" on mattresses scattered in an earth teenage girl's room while they ate pizza.
Stella couldn't think of a better way to spend her time.
Musa lifted the card to her forehead and Terra chuckled as she watched.
"Titanic" was the word.
"You made me cry like two hours." Stella raised her eyebrows at Aisha, a silent question.
"I cried for almost an entire month." Completed Terra.
"I thought it was boring." The 4 girls' eyes fixed on Bloom and she just shrugged with a smile.
"Come on guys, 3 hours of a romance movie, I think I slept in the first hour." Musa raised her eyebrows, trying to get all the clues that were on there.
"It was one of the biggest box offices worldwide." It's Stella's contribution. Musa's eyes glow purple when she has the realization.
"Titanic." She simply says, earning 2 more points for discovering the word even before 40 seconds.
Time passed quickly when she was with the girls. Between talking nonsense, eating junk food, playing silly games. It was just good to have a place where she could be herself, without having to be the impassable princess, the steel lady, or the bitch everyone hated.
Aisha went to sleep first, which was to be expected, considering she woke up as soon as the first ray of sunlight came out. Then Terra, whose animation certainly drained much of her energy. Musa just stuck the earphones in her ears and curled up on one of the mattresses in the corner. She would probably stay up late texting Terra's brother again.
Bloom stretched her legs beside her on the mattress, yawning. Stella remembers thinking her hair looked like copper threads in the poor light and she had the most childish and adorable pajamas she had ever seen.
She used to be decent at controlling emotions with most people. Bloom was a big exception to the rule. She has seen so much of her and yet she believed she was worth it.
Bloom was adorable. She was sweet, kind ... and beautiful.
"You can have the bed if you want, Stell." She turns to say those words and she was too close, her breath hits Stella's cheek directly, hot and smelling like mint. The princess of Solaria's eyes widen and she immediately begins to look at her own hands.
She looked so gorgeous. Her eyes were shining, her lips were pink and probably soft, her hair was disorganized. Teddy bear pajamas.
Why the hell is she thinking about what it would be like to kiss those lips?
"No problem, Bloom." She smiled at her. Her face slowly molded to accommodate that stunning smile.
She blames jealousy. Stella never knew how to share anything. This was some part of her fighting with herself for having a friendship with Bloom when she was dating Sky. It was a petty part of her that wanted to take revenge, it had to be that.
Still, jealousy does not explain why her heart was racing when Bloom touches her hand gently, the softest skin Stella has ever felt.
"So good night. If you need anything, just wake me up. ” Jealousy does not explain why her breath fails when Bloom's lips, so delicate, place a small kiss on her cheek.
She sneaks onto the bed, crawling under the blankets.
Stella stares at the room plunged into darkness for a moment, her fingers are shining. Sparkles in the dark. She tucks them under her thighs, her cheeks flushed with shame.
Jealousy certainly didn't explain that.
(...)
Everyone in Alfea was helping to rebuild the parts that were destroyed by the burned ones. They were fairies, it made sense for people with powers to help bring the school to its former glory.
The Winx suite took over the greenhouse. This would have made Stella get pretty mad in the past, she knew Terra would make a point of explaining each cataloged plant and showing how roots grow and bla bla bla. Regardless, she doesn't argue today, she helps Aisha to exchange some plants of their vases without complaining, it's just good to be back at school. It's good to be home.
"STELLA!" By Bloom's scream, she just saw a new burned one. Stella and Aisha found themselves frowning. The redhead is running towards them with a smile, which relieves Aisha enough for her to return to the tulip she's changing.
"Yes?" Stella frowns, she has seen Bloom excited before. This time she seems to have some big news to say. Her eyes, like the ocean itself on a hot summer day, are shining and looking so childish. She's adorable.
"Here." She extends her hand before the princess can predict and then ... Then she puts a flower in her hair. Stella has to blink a few times, to place herself in that world. Bloom ... Bloom just put a flower in her hair. "Dandelions. It has the tone of your hair. ” It's just a little flower. That's what her mind tries to repeat. It's just a little flower in her hair. It shouldn't have unsettled you like that, but it has. A lot of people have already approached her just wanting something, influence, power, sex. And then Bloom appears so excited to put a flower in her hair. Just because she thought the tone matched.
She's looking at her now, a tiny smile on her mouth. She's not waiting for an answer, Stella notes. She's admiring her own work.
She wished she could kiss her.
For giving so much without thinking about getting anything back. It's just a little flower. But it's more affection than Stella has had almost her entire life.
"Thank you, Bloom." Her smile grows and she leans over again to place another kiss on Stella's cheek. Warm. Comfortable. Like home.
Then she walked away, helping Terra move a really heavy vase.
The princess of Solaria touched the flower in her hair for a brief second, until she noticed Aisha's eyes were on her, with very evident interest. She rolled her eyes and turned to the plant she had to change, hoping it would be enough of an answer for the girl next to her.
She heard a giggle. But she didn't want to care.
When she returned to the suite, she kept the flower inside her jewelry box.
It was truly the tone of her hair.
(...)
She couldn't breathe. Just like having an extremely heavy weight on your throat, on your chest. Everything...Everything it's so suffocating. Breathe through your mouth, she tells herself. If you can't breathe through your nose, breathe through your mouth. You are a princess, princesses don't have shaky fingers. Princesses don't cry out of sheer terror. Princesses maintain perfect posture even when someone punches them in the stomach. Vomit builds up in her throat in almost the same second. She didn't want to relive memories, she didn't want to get to that. It hurts.
It hurts so bad just to think about all that.
Thin tears run down her eyes. She was not as strong as people like to think.
She breaks so easily. Just the prospect of having to face her mother again, just that face, those expressions of pure disappointment.
She would never be enough.
"Stell?" She doesn't recognize the voice right away, but she rubs her hands over her eyes nonetheless, with considerably more force than anyone would normally do. Nobody should see her crying, nobody. "Hey." It's only when she kneels between her legs that Stella actually realizes who is here. The same blue eyes, now clouded with worry, she's worried about her.
She doesn't know if she deserves it.
"It's an allergy." The lie slides over her tongue just as easily as Bloom raises an eyebrow. Her hands reach for hers, fingers sliding between hers so naturally, as if that were the right thing.
"I heard your mother is coming." She's unable to prevent the shiver. Her spine is trembling, her hands are trembling. It's pathetic. She feels tremendously pathetic now. “She's just going to argue about Rosalind and the others who ran away, Stell. Headmistress Dowling is not going to let her take you again. ” As if Headmistress Dowling had stopped something the first time. Her mother was the queen, she could set the world on fire and call it rain and everyone would still bow down to her.
"It's okay, Bloom." No, it wasn't and she seemed to know it wasn't just because of the way her voice sounded. She hated how her accent got even more pronounced when she was having panic attacks.
"If you don't trust the headmistress ..." Bloom tightens her fingers around hers, hers are exceptionally warm in comparison to Stella's. "Trust me." The princess's eyes go from their intertwined hands to the fairy who is on her knees before her. She just asks you to trust her, with those puppy eyes, a frown with a certain purpose. It's understandable to be tempted to simply agree with her.
"And how would you avoid anything, Bloom?" She hesitates for a moment, while a small, suggestive smile stretches across her lips.
"I have my methods." Her eyes shine red, pure fire glowing behind those irises. She laughs next when her eyes go back to blue and Stella doesn't know exactly why, but she laughs as well. The tears come again, but those are not from fear, they are not from self-loathing.
When her fingers reach her face, her thumbs wiping away the tears It's like breathing again, she is no longer drowning. She is no longer suffocating.
She's too good. Stella's thoughts shout, squeak, constantly say she doesn't deserve it. Her hands hold Bloom's over her cheeks, keeping the touch. It's pathetic. So pathetic how she's starving for that touch.
The way she's looking at her now.
Worry. Purity. The slight reassuring smile.
Stella wished she could kiss her. Once again. She doesn't even deny the thought this time.
It should be a sin yearning to kiss an angel.
"Bloom, are you coming?" Sky's voice is what causes Stella's fingers to fall, letting her hands go. His head appears through the door and Bloom looks away from hers, giving her boyfriend a wide smile before getting up.
"Sure, I'll be right there." He leaves, not before frowning slightly. Still don't trust her and she can't blame him.
Bloom still stands in front of her for a few seconds, as if pondering whether to go or not. Finally, she came over to leave a soft touch of her lips on the princess's forehead.
"Nothing you haven't faced worse, Stell." And then she leaves, closing the door behind her.
Stella allowed her body to fall on the bed, covering her eyes with her hands, in a false illusion it would prevent everything she was thinking of now make its way out of her own mind.
This could not be happening.
Not now.
(...)
Training took up most of the afternoon now. The headmistress did not want to risk again, fairies had to do body training as well as the specialists. You can always count on your magic, but you should be able to count on your body too. Stella hated every second of it, she preferred to do physical activities alone. She used to run every day before class and it was great, now there were days when she was barely able to sleep with sore muscles.
She was only able to sleep when the sun was almost up, which meant she was late for class and later late for training, her head still not working relatively well.
Still, what was not common on that particular sunny morning was a sound of discussion in the distance.
Bloom didn't want to train with Sky. Stella watched discreetly as she rubbed talcum on her hands, trying to keep them from slipping with sweat.
"Stay with the delayed princess, then." She avoided rolling her eyes at the specialists coach as she climbed into one of the empty spaces. The sounds of struggles and powers being used around were palpable. She had a vision of Bloom now, arms crossed and a frown on her face, so unusual for her. However, as soon as her eyes reach Stella, she smiles a little and then nods at the coach.
"Are you okay?" The question jumps out of the princess's mouth faster than she could contain.
"If he cares so much about his boyfriend who helped those who almost killed me and my friends, he can go after him, I don't care." So Sky thought he could bring Riven back to reason. She sees this happening. Sky was a dreamer, a good person, he would not stop believing in his friends until they put a sword in his throat.
"Take that frustration out of your fists, redhead." Stella doesn't know where the will comes from, but she doesn't want Bloom to be stressed because of Sky's unbreakable hope. She moves her hands and Bloom's smirk grows.
It would have been simple.
If Bloom wasn't exceptionally good at hand-to-hand.
"Come on, stand up, princess!" Stella gasped and cursed Bloom in 3 different languages while trying to catch her breath after that punch.
She stood up, supporting the weight in her hands for a moment, lifting the base even though her chest now complained with each breath. She had always assumed she and Bloom had almost the same strength, big mistake. They had the same body structure, almost the same height, but Bloom had previous training Stella didn't have. Probably a boxing gym when she was 12. The redhead stepped forward again and she had to maneuver her body in order to avoid her punches, she didn't back down, she had no points she could use to counterattack her. No enemy would ever be able to make Stella sweat the way Bloom did.
"Come on, princess, react!" Stella used to hate it when people used her title to scoff. But by the heat she is exhaling now, just by the way the redhead says that word ... She feels she doesn't care. She didn't know that side of Bloom, that competitive side. The side that has a smile as she directed another punch towards her. Stella dodged this and another almost hit her in the ear, she was panting and aching. For fuck’s sake she wanted Bloom to return to Sky. They had been in this dance for almost an hour, she could barely feel her arms. "It surprises me that you don't trip over your feet while you train." Stella's eyes glowed this time, without her being able to contain it and Bloom chuckled, she seemed to be having a lot of fun annoying her at that moment. Stella could only imagine how red her cheeks might be now and how horrible her hair must have been on that ponytail. "If you can't beat me without those sparkling eyes, princess ..." She landed an extremely well-placed kick in the calf and Stella fell, pathetically. Her back hitting the floor in a way that made her growl. Bloom rode her hips, her fist hovering over her face. "Outside, no one will stop a punch on this pretty face." She gently tapped her palm on her face and the princess's cheeks heated up, she couldn't say the reason, indignation perhaps because of the way Bloom was acting in training, or maybe ... For the way she was sitting on her, but mostly ashamed for a little bit of everything. They were in such a public place. "It was so easy that you didn't even make me sweat, princess." Her smile now, slightly suggestive. Stella feels haughtiness bubbling up the desire and before she realizes it, she uses tremendous force to rotate her body. For the first time, she caught Bloom by surprise, pinning her arms to the floor beside her head now she was between her legs.
The blonde's unstable breathing seemed to be the only sound in the entire space. The fairy's smile gradually returned to her face and Stella couldn't help but roll her eyes.
"Well ... that was unexpected." And then she wrapped up her legs around her waist, turning themselves so suddenly Stella hit her head on the padded floor, hard. "But remember, I will always be on top, princess." Stella frowned, wondering what the hell she meant. What does she mean by that smirk? What does she mean by those bright eyes and the sweat shining on her forehead?
Oh, she looks beautiful like that. Overbearing. Smirking. Sweaty. Between her legs. Something extremely warm rests inside Stella again, rises from the stomach to the cheeks, probably turning them even redder.
Perhaps. Perhaps if there weren't that many people. Maybe if Stella's stomach didn't knot at the thought. Perhaps she could have kissed her. Just to taste how those lips felt when sweaty. She can bet they would be even softer.
It was at that moment that Aisha, who had just left the training with a huge boy, said right next to them.
"Get a room, you two." Bloom fell sideways on the grass, a loud laugh falling from her lips.
Stella took a deep breath. Trying to get her blood to stop pumping through the veins so fast. Her heart was ringing in her ears and she was sure that the moisture between her legs was not sweat.
Damn.
Oh, she was completely screwed.
(...)
Stella was supposed to be studying for the spell class.
Yet something screamed under her skin, it prevented her from concentrating as little as possible to truly study.
She had to speak to Bloom. This was already getting slightly out of control. She had to speak to her even if it was to lead to the worst rejection she has ever had. If they wanted to maintain a healthy friendship they could not go on with playing, little flowers, touches, and rolling on the grass with legs intertwined as if it were nothing. Because for Stella it was a lot, it was a lot more than just friendly.
She knew that Bloom would be the only one in the Winx suite that afternoon. She saw Musa with her head stuck in a book in the library before coming. Terra was in the greenhouse. Aisha was with the headmistress. Bloom would be here. It would just be them. She would solve this. Today.
She is a princess. She doesn't back off.
Her fingers are trembling slightly when she reaches for the doorknob and turns into the suite's living room. Just so she doesn't have any reaction.
The suite is completely decorated with gold, white and silver ribbons. There is a huge one hanging in front of the windows. "Happy Birthday, Stell".
It seems that time is stopped for a moment. She doesn't know what she is really waiting for, what is really going on. It's like being under the water, your ears numb, your head light, but heavy with thoughts.
She...What?
"You weren't supposed to be here!" Bloom walked into the room with her arms crossed and the most adorable pout Stella had ever seen in her mouth. She's certainly upset, but in a lovely way, like herself.
"What ... What is this?" She asks, fingers pointing at everything. Her reasoning seems to be a little slow, she can't really understand why the hell ... Why?
“It's your birthday today, isn't it? I assumed it was close to the summer solstice, but I had no idea when, so I asked headmistress Dowling. ” It's her birthday. She feels stupid for not remembering the moment she saw the ribbon. But it's not until the moment Bloom says those words she remembers. It's really her birthday. Stella doesn't remember the last time she celebrated a birthday. Probably before her father died, there was no party, or colored ribbons, or hugs after that. Her mother didn't believe in birthday gifts, simply because they could buy anything any day of the year.
Nothing was special. Nothing had any meaning.
Bloom... Everything has a meaning to her. A smile. Some words. Such a lovely gesture as that.
Adorable.
That was the word that always came to her when she thought about Bloom. Ever. She is lovable in so many ways. She's the type of person who researches friends' birthdays to throw surprise parties. The kind of person who arranges colored ribbons and devotes time just to see someone happy. She was the first person who remembered her birthday ... in years.
Stella has to swallow hard so that tears do not reach her eyes.
"I'm sorry for ruining everything." Bloom approaches, arms crossed, pouting on the lips. But she smiles when she stops in front of her, bright, warm.
"I have something for you, actually." Stella frowns, genuinely curious. She can't imagine what kind of gift Bloom would have bought. She just knew she would love it, even if she didn't need or use it, she would keep it like the flower. Because for her everything has a meaning. "Close your eyes." The redhead asks then, making the princess' eyebrows become even more pronounced. "Please." She adds. Stella is sure she will always do whatever she wants as long as she makes those puppy eyes.
It's trust.
Bloom smells like vanilla. When she closes her eyes she can smell her considerably better. She can feel where her body is.
But she did not expect.
She didn't expect Bloom to hold her by the cheeks and then lean over to touch her mouth to hers.
Stella's eyes widened, her heart beating so difficult now it could easily get out of her throat. She can feel all the heat building upon her cheeks, she can't think straight. Yet she closes her eyes and kisses her back. Bloom's mouth is warm and extremely inviting, as a fire fairy must be. She tastes like mint.
It's only a few seconds, just a few seconds that seem to steal all of Stella's breath. When the redhead walks away, touching her forehead on her shoulder, the princess knows her breathing is pathetically flawed. But it's the light pink tone of Bloom's cheeks that draws her attention. She is as flushed as she is.
"I thought if you were never going to make the first move, then I would have to." Stella bites her bottom lip, a little embarrassment warming her face. She was older than Bloom and she was about to make the first move. She spent days gathering the courage to do so. But the other girl seemed to be born to be the bravest of fairies. She acted, she simply held her by the cheeks and then kissed her. There is fear, but she acts despite of it. That is courage.
She had so much to learn from this fairy that had turned her life upside down.
"What an inexpensive gift, Bloom." She jokes and her eyes go up. Bluer than Stella remembered, her cheeks a beautiful shade of pink. She pats the princess on the shoulder, pouting back to her mouth. Stella chuckles. It's fun. It's relief.
She has so many questions for her. But she is sure that they all can wait.
"Can I order another one?" Her arms wrap around the fire fairy's waist so naturally, as if they were made to stay there. It's different, different in a very welcome way. Bloom's smile couldn't be described as anything more than suggestive, her thumbs caressing the warm skin on Stella's cheeks.
She is sure she would kill for that touch.
"You certainly can." Stella wished she could kiss Bloom 4 times from the moment she fell in love with her. She leaned over, almost testing the air, before allowing her lips to touch the other fairy's again. 4 times, and then she kissed her. Long and sweet. As if everything else was just a blurry memory she didn't care about.
What mattered was Bloom's mouth, the way her lips tasted like candy, and how her body felt against hers. It felt like the most certain thing Stella had ever done in her life.
Bloom's fingers came down to gently wrap her neck, the touch like rose petals. She slid her tongue over her bottom lip. A silent and gentle request. The way her tongue slid into her mouth so easily caused an almost painful shiver down the light fairy's spine.
She had never been kissed like that. By anyone. It's almost devotional. It doesn't take. It gives.
Her legs are weak.
She could spend her whole life kissing Bloom.
"I think we are going to have problems with Musa." The redhead murmurs, her mouth still partially on hers. A chuckle leaves Stella's lips and so does the fire fairy's.
"Let her change rooms." Bloom laughs louder when Stella's mouth drops to her neck, sliding her lips across the sensitive skin.
Her arms wrap around her shoulders, the touch still delicate but firm.
"Happy Birthday." She bends to say those words right next to Stella's ear. It looks like the sweetest happy birthday she's ever heard.
She should have kissed her that same night. It's what she thinks. She could have kissed Bloom the first time she wanted to.
But now she had an excuse to catch all those which were stolen from her.
Stella leans into her mouth again. And when her lips meet, she doesn't think about Sky. She doesn't think about her mother. She doesn't think about the other girls.
She dives. She dives into the sunshine Bloom had become for her.
Her sunshine.