Frostbite, with you by my side

by catjeno

Summary:

Breathe in, breathe out.

Biting cold stung Chongyun’s ears and nose, wind whipping at his face and torso. He was just glad Xingqiu wasn’t here to see him right now. Chongyun the popsicle, he would say. You are what you eat, my dear friend!

Chongyun and Xingqiu. Like that would ever happen. Until he found a way to rid himself of his Yang energy, he would just be a burden.

Maybe that was why he made such a risky plan up on Dragonspine. He needed to see how much it took to finally be in control. With shaking arms and legs, he reached the edge of the freezing lake. The world grew dark, hazy. Everything was just… numb.

* * *
"Chongyun!" Xingqiu called out into the storm.

Chapter 1

Summary:

The storm bit into his skin and spat snow into his eyes, but he ran onward. He had to get Chongyun to safety. He couldn't let him die on this mountain.

Notes:

yes this is another "chongyun goes to Dragonspine and xingqiu has to take care of him" fic inspired by chongyun's character stories. but i had this idea in my head since dragonspine first came out so really i'm the OG here /j

Breathe in, breathe out.

Biting cold stung Chongyun’s ears and nose, wind whipping at his face and torso. His body ached, his limbs begged him to find someplace warm. His mind did its best to shut it all out, to focus only on meditation. It was not an easy task.

In, out.

From the waist below, he sat submerged completely in icy water. His legs were beyond numb, he wouldn’t be surprised if they had frozen over themselves at this point. A normal person would have been dead by now, but Chongyun was not a normal person.

The exorcist had been to Dragonspine multiple times before to train his endurance, but he'd never done something like this. Sitting in a frozen lake for hours on end. But it was as necessary as it was painful; he needed to subject himself to these conditions, he needed to see just how much he could take.

In, out.

This time, Chongyun had come to Dragonspine after hearing news of a spirit. Multiple adventurers had come running down the mountain, warning of a hazy figure cloaked in silver and white that floated along the snowy paths. One adventurer swore it caused a small avalanche, another said he’d heard the haunting wails of a woman before he saw the figure. It all sounded like a classic ghost case, the wandering soul of someone lost, who needed guidance out of the living world. Chongyun hoped he could be that guide. He’d ventured up the mountain, promising himself to not return until he’d successfully exorcised the spirit.

By now, that had been hours ago. Chongyun had lost count of exactly how long he’d been sitting in this lake. Persistent snowstorms grayed the sky year-round in Dragonspine, so he couldn’t even track the sun’s movement.

His patience started to waver.

How much longer would he be sitting here? Was the spirit even real? Chongyun had been so sure of it when he climbed up the mountain, there had been multiple accounts from different adventurers, yet he hadn’t sensed a single thing yet. Besides, he wasn’t sure how much longer he could endure this cold.

He was just glad Xingqiu wasn’t here to see him right now. Chongyun the popsicle, he would say. You are what you eat, my dear friend!

Something rustled in the trees to his left, snapping him out of his thoughts. His eyes shot open and he turned toward the source of the sound, ready to attack. There! Something moved behind the trees.

Chongyun started toward the shore, but where adrenaline should have made him alert and agile, he felt sluggish and clumsy. His legs were stiff and numb, and they wouldn’t move right. He tripped, stumbling in the water with a splash. He re-emerged after a moment, instantly feeling the fierce bite of the wind on his skin. After being completely drenched, the wind seemed somehow colder than before. It stung his face and bare arms, whipping its icy tongues around his dripping body.

He squinted toward the trees, just in time to see a white blur dart out from behind them and scurry down the mountain. A snow rabbit.

Chongyun’s heart sank. It wasn’t a spirit at all.

With shaking arms and legs, he reached the edge of the lake, knees buckling as they reached the shore. The world grew dark, hazy. Wind still whipped at his face, water still soaked his limbs to the bone, yet he couldn’t seem to feel it anymore. Fog clouded his mind and his fingers. Everything was just… numb.

Some distant part of his brain yelled at him to get up, to light that little pile of sticks he’d gathered a few hours prior. It told him he needed warmth. But Chongyun ignored it. He couldn’t even feel his legs anymore, let alone move them an inch.

His eyes were so heavy, he couldn’t keep them open. Where was he right now? He was sure he knew the answer, he just couldn’t remember it anymore. The cold was fading, his thoughts were too.

Maybe he should nap. Yes, that sounded like a good idea.

A flash of silver, the wail of a woman…

Chongyun closed his eyes.

 

“Chongyun!” Xingqiu called out. It was no use, the wind snatched his words away as soon as they left his mouth. He shivered, squinting through the blowing snow for any trace of his friend. “Chongyun!” he screamed again.

“Xingqiu, stop, that’s not helping,” Xiangling said. “You’re just going to hurt your throat.”

Xingqiu’s shoulders dropped. Though he wanted to protest, he knew Xiangling was right. He turned to her. “How are we ever going to find him in this storm?”

By now, it must have been hours since Chongyun ventured up the mountain of Dragonspine. And he was still out here somewhere, hidden in the sea of white.

Xiangling didn't have an answer, only putting her gloved hand on Xingqiu's shoulder as a response. Xingqiu opened his mouth to speak again when something caught his eye.

There. Half buried in the snow a few feet ahead of them, something glinted blue. Xingqiu approached it and bent over, picking it up gently. He gasped. "This is…" he trailed off.

"What’d you find?"

Xingqiu spun around, holding the talisman up triumphantly for Xiangling to see. "This is Chongyun's. He's been here."

Xiangling's eyes widened. "If that's really true, then—" Her eyes darted to the ground, studying the snow. "Look. His footprints!" She was right; a visible dip in the snow led up the mountain. By now it was half-buried; they might not have even noticed it if they hadn't seen the talisman.

"There's no way to tell how old they are," Xiangling said. "I would say it's been at least an hour, probably more." But now we have a lead. Xiangling and Xingqiu exchanged glances, a new determination pulsing through their veins.

The pair trudged onward through the snowstorm, cold numbing their fingertips and noses. Up through a sea of white, not even sure of how close they were to their destination. With each step forward, anxiety built higher in Xingqiu's chest.

Would Chongyun be okay? They had a trail to follow now, but what if they were too late? Xiangling said it had probably been hours since Chongyun had been here; he might not even be near them right now.

It wasn't that Xingqiu thought the mountain had swallowed up his friend or anything. No, Chongyun was strong. But he’d been gone all day—in Dragonspine of all places—and it was unusual for his exorcisms to take this long. The longer he was gone, the harder it became for Xingqiu to ward off some of the darker thoughts.

The Hydro user was so caught up in his own mind that he didn't notice Xiangling stopping in front of him. He walked right into her, snapping him out of his thoughts. "Why did you stop? We—" He followed Xiangling's gaze and the words died in his throat.

They had reached a half-frozen pond, its deathly cold water sitting innocently under a thin layer of ice. On the other side, Xingqiu could see a figure sprawled out on the shore, drenched in water and wearing only a thin undershirt and a pair of pants.

Chongyun.

Xiangling broke out of her shocked state, crying out as she took off toward the other end of the pond. "Chongyun!"

Xingqiu followed, nearly tripping over himself in his haste. Somehow he beat Xiangling to Chongyun. He dropped to his knees, hands hovering above his friend's figure. They were shaking, not just from the cold, but he managed to take his gloves off to look for a pulse on Chongyun's wrist.

He let out a small gasp as his fingers touched Chongyun's bare skin. The exorcist’s wrist was so cold. How long had he been out here without a coat? His skin too, was beyond pale, an almost purple tinge spread across his entire body. He looked like a corpse.

Xingqiu held his breath as he searched for a pulse. For a moment, a horrifying, heart-stopping moment he felt nothing.

But then, he felt a small beat. And then another.

Xingqiu breathed a sigh of relief. "He's alive. But his heartbeat is so faint. We need to get him warm. Are you able to make a fire?" As he spoke, he took his own coat off and draped it around Chongyun. The freezing wind wasted no time, it pierced through his undershirt the second his coat was off. He gritted his teeth, already starting to shiver.

Xiangling nodded and crouched in front of the small pile of sticks on the shore. At first Xingqiu thought Chongyun must have assembled those, but then why did he not light it? No, that didn't make any sense. Chongyun didn't even have his coat, and Xingqiu couldn't see his claymore anywhere. The Cryo user must have been attacked, or chased here.

Xingqiu bit his lip. Right now it didn't matter how Chongyun ended up here, or who made the kindling. Xingqiu needed to focus on saving his friend.

Spark. Spark.

Xiangling cursed. "It won't light. Even with my Vision, it's too cold and windy here for the fire to stay lit."

Xingqiu paled. "Then, that means—"

"We need to move him. Somewhere out of the wind."

"Down the mountain." Xingqiu said.

Xiangling looked at him hesitantly. “Shouldn’t we just try to find a cave?”

Xingqiu shook his head, remembering how they hadn’t seen a single cave on the way up. “You saw the state of Dragonspine as we climbed it. Looking for a cave would only waste time. Besides, we need to get him to a doctor, we should not delay that any longer than we need to.”

"But—"

"Xiangling, please.” Xingqiu’s voice wavered. “He needs a doctor."

Maybe Xiangling could see the anguish hidden in Xingqiu’s eyes, because she suddenly gave in. “Alright. I’ll follow your lead.”

Xingqiu picked up Chongyun and hauled him onto his back, rationality slipping into desperation. He could feel Chongyun’s breath against his ear, shallow and weak. There wasn’t much time left, they had to get down the mountain quickly. Without another word he took off with Chongyun on his back. Xiangling followed closely behind.

They marched forward, through the endless sea of white and wind. Xingqiu ran as fast as he could with snow at his feet and Chongyun on his back. The storm bit into his skin and spat snow into his eyes, but he ran onward. The world disappeared, he was only vaguely aware of Xiangling behind him. All that mattered right now was him and Chongyun, and the impossible mountain looming around them.

Wind whipped at Xingqiu’s face. Ice burrowed into his lungs. He couldn’t breathe, it was too cold, far too cold.

No, he told himself. Keep moving. Just keep moving forward. Chongyun was the only thought that kept him going. He had to get Chongyun to safety. He couldn’t let his friend die on this mountain.

But no matter how steady Xingqiu’s resolve was, no matter how hard he wanted to keep going, his limbs still trembled. He was carrying twice his weight on his back, in a snowstorm, without a coat. There was only so much his body could handle.

At some point his foot caught a rock under the layer of snow, and he tumbled to the ground. A soft cushion of snow broke his fall. He barely even registered the new cold on his skin before he hoisted himself back up and stumbled over to Chongyun.

Xingqiu had always believed he had a strong resolve. But seeing his friend’s limp figure sprawled out on the ground, something broke inside of him. As if a switch turned off in his body—all of his strength left him, just like that. He bent over to pick up Chongyun again, but found he could barely get him off the ground. Xingqiu’s legs shook, his arms felt like lead. Trapped by deadly snow on either side, he just didn’t have the strength.

It suddenly hit Xingqiu how far away they were from the base of the mountain. What was he thinking, trying to carry Chongyun all the way down there? They would never make it in time.

He looked around for a tree or a bush, any flammable object. Nothing. Just ice and snow and rock. Xingqiu stared mournfully at Chongyun, painfully aware of his own trembling limbs and pounding head. He didn’t think he could carry his friend another step.

That was it. They were done for.

He sank to his knees and cradled Chongyun against his chest. Xiangling appeared by his side, taking her coat off and draping it around the Cryo user, as Xingqiu had done earlier. Her expression was soft, somber.

Xingqiu’s eyes stung with tears. “Why…?” Why didn’t he accompany Chongyun on this exorcism? Why did he and Xiangling wait so long to check up on him? Why did Xingqiu even think for a moment that they could make it off this mountain in time?

Why couldn’t Xingqiu save his dearest friend?

So many thoughts fluttered in his head, but it was all too much, they just tangled into a hopeless, pathetic why.

Xiangling had no answer. There was nothing she could say, so she just stayed silent. The silence mixed with the wind and the snow, cold and hopeless.

Xingqiu never expected his story to end like this. Surrounded by unforgiving snow and ice, unable to see the sun or even the sky. He'd always imagined it lighter, warmer.

He supposed that was the cruelest thing about death. It takes when and where it wants to, and there is no choice but to follow.

Follow.

Numbly.

Into the endless white sea.

 

“What are you doing here?”

Xingqiu and Xiangling spun around. The sight was something out of a dream.

Standing a bit up the mountain was a person, a real, actual person! A scarf of sorts covered most of his face, Xingqiu could only pick out a pair of bright eyes and a few wisps of blond hair sticking out of his hat. Even so, something about him was…familiar.

“Are you alright?” the man spoke again, marching toward the trio. He locked eyes with Xingqiu and faltered. “Xingqiu?”

“Yes?” Xingqiu asked, taken aback that the man recognized him. “Do we know each other?” The man stilled for a second, pausing to remove his face covering. It only took Xingqiu a moment to recognize the alchemist. He gasped.

“Mr. Kreideprinz?"

Albedo nodded. Then he caught sight of Chongyun, unconscious and cradled limply in Xingqiu’s arms, and his eyes widened slightly. “Your friend…” He inched forward, kneeling down in front of the trio. His hands hovered above Chongyun, a frown creasing his features. “We need to bring him somewhere warm. May I?”

Xingqiu gave a stunned nod, still not completely sure he was still alive. He couldn’t believe it. Someone—not just someone, Albedo—had found them, all the way up on this mountain. Truly, this must be a miracle.

He watched silently as Albedo took Chongyun in his arms. He picked him up deftly, yet with a tenderness reminiscent of how an older brother would. Albedo had never seemed like the brotherly type before, but at that moment, Xingqiu wondered if he had any siblings of his own.

"I have a camp not too far from here. I'll be able to help him once we're there. Can you stand?" Xingqiu nodded again, forcing his numb legs up before he extended a hand out to Xiangling.

Albedo led them up Dragonspine quickly. The snow storm surged, doing everything in its power to halt their trek. But the alchemist didn't even seem to notice, trudging onward as if carrying exorcists up a snowy mountain was a regular occurence.

The minutes dragged on, and cold bit deeper into Xingqiu's skin with each passing second. It became harder and harder to ignore, as needles of pain slowly overtook his numb limbs. His eyes kept darting forward to Chongyun. He wasn’t sure what he expected, it wasn’t like anything about his friend would change, he just couldn’t bear to keep his eyes away for more than a few seconds.

Xingqiu wondered how long Chongyun had been by that lake before they found him. All alone and freezing to death, he’d probably been scared out of his mind. Once again, guilt and anger swarmed Xingqiu, and he scolded himself for not being there. All of this could have been prevented if only he’d come with Chongyun, if he’d only stayed by his side.

“My camp is up ahead,” Albedo announced, breaking Xingqiu out of his thoughts. He stepped onto an old wooden bridge, and the planks let out a horrible groan. The splintered thing was threatening to give at any moment. Xingqiu wondered if it would even last through the storm. He didn’t want to test the bridge’s limits, so he hurried across, refusing to even glance down.

Only a few steps more, and they made it to Albedo’s refuge, a small cave in the mountainside. They stepped inside, and were instantly surrounded by warmth. The world grew quieter too, as the relentless wind no longer pelted their faces with ice. Xingqiu and Xiangling looked around, mouths open in awe.

Torches and lanterns glowed merrily in every corner. Books and alchemy equipment sat in messy piles around the cave. Xingqiu even spotted an easel resting unused against the far wall. He never expected a place as warm and inviting as this to be halfway up the deadliest mountain in Teyvat.

Albedo made a beeline to one end of the cave, laying Chongyun down on a sleeping roll. He worked silently, removing Chongyun’s sopping clothes and covering him with a thick blanket. He stood up and made his way to one of the few tables in the cave. On top of it, books and bottles littered every available space. A brewing stand sat unlit on the tabletop.

Albedo filed through the potions, a soft clinking sound filling the cave as he searched. His hands stopped over a tiny red bottle, and he muttered something to himself. Apparently, it was what he was looking for, because he grabbed it and marched back to Chongyun.

He uncorked it, lifting Chongyun’s head and putting it to the boy’s blue lips. He noticed Xingqiu’s curious stare, and paused to explain. “This is a warming potion. It will combat hypothermia and frostbite. I actually came up with the recipe for my expeditions here in Dragonspine.” He emptied the little bottle’s contents into Chongyun’s mouth. “To be completely safe though, we should give it to him every few hours until he wakes up.”

“So, is he going to be okay?” Xiangling asked.

Albedo nodded, laying Chongyun back gently onto the ground. “For the time being. Although the warming potion does have some side effects. He might develop a fever, especially since he was out in the cold for so long.” He straightened and turned to Xingqiu and Xiangling. “But we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. For now, you two should warm up as well. I'll make a fire."

Xingqiu felt like the weight of a million worlds lifted off his shoulders. Chongyun was really going to be okay. He sent a silent thanks to the Archons, because, really, it was a miracle that Albedo had found them when he did. Or even that Xingqiu and Xiangling were able to find Chongyun in the first place.

But now that Chongyun was safe, the events of the past hour finally caught up with Xingqiu’s mind. He realized how truly exhausted he was. Every limb ached, his head pounded and his legs felt like they were filled with sand. He was more than happy to sit down by the warm fire and drink the cup of tea that Albedo had placed into his hands.

“So,” Xiangling said, taking a sip of her own tea, “how exactly do you two know each other?”

That’s right! Xingqiu never got the chance to introduce Xiangling to Albedo. “Ah, apologies, Xiangling. This is Mr. Kreideprinz. He illustrated the drawings in my books."

Xiangling’s eyes lit up. “So this is your artist friend! You never told me he’s an adventurer!”

“I’m not, really,” Albedo chimed in. “I’m an alchemist, my time on Dragonspine is mostly for research purposes. And though Xingqiu refuses to, you can just call me Albedo. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He extended his hand for Xiangling to shake. She did, somehow managing to not spill her full cup of tea in the process.

“I’m Xiangling. Our friend over there is Chongyun.” She gestured to the sleeping roll. “He’s an exorcist. He came here after word of an evil spirit. Xingqiu and I came with him to the mountain, but we never intended to go up ourselves. But he was gone for hours, so we went to look for him. We found him passed out halfway up.”

Albedo nodded, expression unchanging. "I see." He paused for a moment, thinking. "This ghost, do you know anything about it?"

Xiangling shook her head. "Not much. You would have to ask Chongyun about it, he would know more than us. But he did tell us a bit…"

The rest of her words faded out. Xingqiu stared at the storm raging outside, his thoughts drifting to a certain blue-haired exorcist.

He found himself doing that a lot lately—thinking of Chongyun. Many times it would happen out of nowhere; his friend came to mind over the simplest things. Sometimes Xingqiu would see a specific verse of poetry, or maybe a particularly beautiful glaze lily, and a moment later all that would come to mind was his dear friend.

Xingqiu had long brushed those thoughts off; of course he would think of Chongyun often, they were best friends after all. But recently, he wasn't so sure that was the true reason.

Maybe, just maybe, Xingqiu had started to see Chongyun as more than a friend.

Because now Xingqiu started to notice the little things about Chongyun. Because now every time they locked eyes, Xingqiu’s heart skipped a beat. Because now he couldn't seem to get his dear friend out of his head. None of that used to happen before.

Chongyun, his childhood friend and number one victim of his pranks, was now a thought that kept Xingqiu up almost every night. The thought of having feelings for Chongyun scared Xingqiu as much as it excited him, and had been the subject of more than just one verse of his poetry.

But if Xingqiu was honest, it was also frustrating. Chongyun was so cold all the time, Xingqiu wondered if his friend even felt the same way. It didn’t appear to be so; Chongyun had never once shown interest in Xingqiu, at least not in that way. And despite how long they’d been friends, Chongyun still kept most of his walls up.

No, Xingqiu scolded himself, he wasn't being fair. It wasn't like Chongyun wanted to be cold to him. He was cold to everyone. He needed to keep his emotions in check to control his congenital positivity.

It was just confusing sometimes for Xingqiu, that was all. Figuring out his own feelings when he couldn't read his friend at all, it was exhausting.

He sighed and took another sip of his tea, savoring the traces of cecilia as they danced across his tongue. No matter how much he wanted to sometimes, Xingqiu couldn't resent Chongyun. It wasn't like the Cryo user was at fault for anything.

“Mr. Kreideprinz,” he started. Albedo and Xiangling suddenly stopped talking, and Xingqiu realized he’d just interrupted them. His cheeks reddened. “Ah, apologies. I should not have done that. Please, continue your conversation.”

“No, it’s alright,” Albedo said. Xiangling nodded in agreement. “You seemed lost pretty deep in thought a second ago, is something on your mind?”

Xingqiu dropped his gaze, chewing on the inside of his lip. “I just—I want to sincerely thank you for saving Chongyun. If you had not done that…”

Albedo nodded. “There’s no need for a thank you. Just make sure to come more prepared if you ever scale Dragonspine again.”

Both Xiangling and Xingqiu reddened. “Yes sir,” Xiangling answered for them with an embarrassed smile.

Albedo smiled softly. “You two are brave. Not many would be willing to climb up this mountain for a friend. It’s a very admirable thing to do.”

His words rang through Xingqiu's head, swirling his thoughts into cascades. For a friend. Right, because that's all Chongyun and Xingqiu were. Friends. Nothing more.

The sudden urge to yawn pulled Xingqiu out of his thoughts. He barely even realized it had gotten dark, he’d been so focused on other things. He glanced at Xiangling. She looked equally tired, probably aching too from their trip.

Albedo urged them to rest. “I don’t doubt you both have had a long day,” he said, gesturing to a pile of blankets nestled next to a bookshelf. “I have extra sleeping rolls. Please feel free to use them.”

Xingqiu graciously accepted the offer. He got up from beside the fire and pulled two rolls from the blanket pile. He passed one to Xiangling, before laying his roll out on the ground and settling in. The roll was old and lumpy, and smelled vaguely of mildew, but he didn’t care at all. It felt like heaven to his tired joints.

Meanwhile, Albedo knelt next to Chongyun, checking his vitals and giving him another dose of the warming potion. To Xingqiu's relief, Chongyun already looked much better than before; some color had returned to his skin, and the steady rise and fall of his chest under the blankets meant his breathing had evened out too.

With droopy eyes, Xingqiu glanced across to Chongyun. Normally, this was when his mind would wander, where he would start to overthink. But at the moment it was too foggy from exhaustion, his only thoughts involving the exorcist were that Chongyun was safe, Chongyun would be okay.

In no time, the warm crackle of the fire and his friends' steady breathing lulled Xingqiu into a comfortable sleep.

Notes:

my first genshin fic ahhh ! and to think I've had the game since release smh

like i said earlier i've had this idea since the Dragonspine update but i literally have not had the time or mental capacity to fully flesh out anything till now....so here it is 8 months late!
i could ramble more but i won't lol so i hope u guys enjoy!!

Chapter 2

Summary:

And the irony of it all. An author so starstruck that he is unable to read.

Rendered useless by love.

Xingqiu awoke to a soft clinking sound. He sat up groggily, blinking at the unfamiliar surroundings. His eyes landed on Chongyun lying near him, still asleep under a thick blanket, and everything from the day before came rushing back to him.

Chongyun’s trek up the mountain. Xingqiu and Xiangling going up to save him, only to find him passed out and freezing to death. Albedo’s miraculous appearance. So much had happened, Xingqiu could still barely believe it. Part of him hadn’t even registered leaving Liyue Harbor; he was half-convinced that at any moment he would wake up in his own bed, and this was all just a long, tiring dream.

He sat up, and winced. His muscles ached, even more than they had the night before. The pain was enough to reassure Xingqiu that he was most certainly not dreaming.

“Oh, you’re awake,” someone said. Xingqiu turned to see Albedo standing over a cluttered desk, fiddling with some bottles. Every so often the bottles would bump together, making a small clink that sounded to Xingqiu like the footsteps of glass fairies—if such a thing were to exist.

“What are you doing?” He stood up and approached, speaking in a quiet voice so as to not wake Xiangling.

“Taking an inventory of ingredients. I only have a few doses left of the warming potion, so I’ll need to make more. However, the recipe requires starsilver ore, and I just used up my last supply a few days ago. I’ll have to go down the mountain today to find some. You should stay here, though, and watch over your friend.”

Xingqiu glanced out the opening of the cave. It was still snowing; flakes tumbled from the gray sky and swirled in the wind, but the storm did seem to have calmed down a bit. “Are you sure you will be okay?” he asked anyway.

Albedo nodded, picking up a large, clouded bottle and examining its contents. “I’m no stranger to going out in this type of weather. It should only take a few hours at most.”

Just then, rustling sounded to their left. The pair turned to see Xiangling sitting up in her makeshift bed. She saw them and gave a sleepy smile. “G’morning,” she mumbled with a yawn. A moment later, she stood by their side. “What’s going on?”

“Mr. Kreideprinz is going to go out for materials today. He is in need of more starsilver for the warming potion.”

Xiangling’s eyes lit up. “You’re going out?" she asked Albedo. "Can I come with you?”

Xingqiu stared at her. The events of yesterday still blazed fresh in his mind. He could practically still feel the way snow pelted his neck and arms in the storm, or how the icy needles of cold pricked his numb fingers. Going back out onto the mountain was about the last thing he wanted to do right now, he didn’t see why Xiangling was so eager. “Are you not tired from yesterday?” he asked.

“Well, yes, but I’ve never explored Dragonspine before. Maybe I could find some new ingredients to bring home.”

She turned to Albedo, whose expression was unchanged. “I don’t see a problem with that,” he said. “As long as you stay near me, we should be fine. I have a thicker coat you can wear if you need it.”

Xiangling clapped her hands together, rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet. “Yay! Thank you! I’ll cook something before we go.”

A quick breakfast later, and Xiangling and Albedo were ready to head out. Before they left, Albedo checked on Chongyun once more. He knelt down by the Cryo user’s side, feeling his pulse. He paused for a second, brow creased, then moved his hands to Chongyun’s forehead.

“I was afraid of this,” Albedo muttered to himself. And then, louder, “He has a fever.”

“Is there anything that can be done for him?” Xingqiu asked.

Albedo shook his head curtly. “Not with the materials I have at the camp. Since you’re staying here, you’ll just have to try to bring it down naturally. I want to be completely sure he’s safe from frostbite though, so if Xiangling and I are not back by midday, give him one more dose of the warming potion.”

Xingqiu nodded. Albedo stood up. “Well, we better get going. Take care, Xingqiu."

"Bye!" Xiangling chirped. And then they were gone.

Not a minute had passed before Xingqiu turned to Chongyun, kneeling down and checking his forehead just as Albedo had done. It was beaded with sweat, and unusually warm to the touch.

"You fool," Xingqiu muttered as he brushed Chongyun's hair off of his clammy forehead. "Look what you've gotten yourself into this time."

Chongyun, still asleep, didn't respond.

Xingqiu sighed to himself. He got up and searched for something he could use as a damp cloth. He eventually found one, dipping it in the snow outside the cave before returning to Chongyun's side. As he gently set it on his forehead, he was hit with a memory from when they were kids.

It was years ago, they couldn't have been more than eight or nine years old, and it was the only time Xingqiu remembered Chongyun ever getting sick. Despite his parents' wishes, Xingqiu had snuck into Chongyun's room, who was stuck in bed. He'd stayed by Chongyun's side for hours, reading books aloud or simply rambling whatever came to mind to pass the time.

Xingqiu smiled softly at the memory, a twinge of something clenching his heart. He wasn't sure what the feeling was exactly. Nostalgia, perhaps. Or maybe regret.

That time too, he was the one caring for Chongyun. And now, after so much had changed, he found himself in the same place as all those years ago. Funny how things worked out like that. Was it fate, Xingqiu wondered, or just coincidence?

The young author took a deep breath, taking in the new quiet and stillness of the camp. It truly radiated coziness; the torches and campfire crackled merrily, filling the den with a sunset tinge and the sense of home. The firelight reflected off the glass bottles and casted a warm glow on the bookshelves. A moment of solitude indeed, Xingqiu thought.

But as comforting as the silence was, Xingqiu didn’t dare bathe in it for more than a few minutes. This was a new development; he used to cherish every second he got alone. But recently, every period of quiet would cause his mind to wander to places that made his heart flutter out of his chest. One way or another, his thoughts would find their way to Chongyun, and Xingqiu would only be left in a pit of doubt and confusion.

No, it was better to push all of that away. Xingqiu found distractions. Now more than ever, the second heir to the Feiyun Commerce Guild could be found with his nose in a book. Books, he found, were the perfect distraction, because it left no room for his mind to wander when he was immersed in a story.

He got up and dusted himself off. Maybe Albedo had some old alchemy journals somewhere that he could read. Earlier he noticed some books resting under the potions table, so he headed for those first. He grabbed whatever sat on top of the pile and opened it. It was indeed a journal; neat diagrams sat next to scrawls of messy notes on almost every page.

Smiling, Xingqiu took the book and returned to his spot on the ground next to Chongyun. The minutes flew by, and soon he’d finished that journal as well as two others. By the time he finished the third one, it was about midday. Which meant Chongyun needed another dose of the warming potion.

Xingqiu took the potion from the table and lifted Chongyun’s head up gently, as Albedo had done. He took the cold cloth off his friend’s head before tilting the small bottle to his lips. Chongyun suddenly coughed, and Xingqiu nearly jumped back in shock. A moment later Chongyun's eyes opened slowly.

He looked around, confused. “What—”

Before he could finish, Xingqiu threw his arms around him. “You idiot!” he said into Chongyun’s shoulder. “Don’t you ever do that again.”

Chongyun, though subdued at first, hugged back. A bolt of electricity shot up Xingqiu as the exorcist’s arms wrapped around his back, and he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to lean in or squirm away.

Chongyun broke the hug first. “Where are we?” he asked. His voice sounded sluggish, matching the glassy look on his eyes.

Xingqiu didn’t respond immediately, his mind spun as he tried to process the ghost of Chongyun’s arms wrapped around him. He cleared his throat, eyes darting everywhere except the blue-haired boy in front of him. “Somewhere safe. A friend was kind enough to let us stay at his camp on the mountain. Y-you didn’t return from your exorcism, so Xiangling and I set out to find you. When we finally did, you were half-submerged in a frozen lake.”

“Oh,” was all Chongyun said. His face was unreadable.

Without thinking, Xingqiu took Chongyun’s hands in his, forcing the exorcist to look at him. “What happened? Where did your coat go? Archons, do you know how much you worried me?”

Xingqiu gripped Chongyun’s hands, waiting for him to answer. Their faces were so close now, he could clearly see the rosy tint on his friend’s lips and cheeks. Chongyun’s icy eyes, framed by his fluffy hair, glinted gold in the torchlight. Xingqiu’s heart skipped another beat.

Chongyun dropped his gaze, eyes going glassy again. “Worried,” he repeated, almost to himself than Xingqiu. He blinked slowly, as if he was trying to remember something.

Xingqiu faltered. “Are you alright?” Chongyun looked back up, staring at him with a blank expression. Again, he looked almost confused, and Xingqiu wondered if he’d hit his head before they found him.

Xingqiu was about to let go of his hands when Chongyun suddenly pulled him forward. The world moved in a blur, Xingqiu only had time to process Chongyun's rosy lips before he saw them getting closer and closer. The next thing he knew, they were on his own.

For a moment, the world ignited in a burst of color, a whirlwind of light and warmth. Xingqiu’s heart flew out of chest like a firework, exploding with every known emotion in Teyvat. Chongyun’s lips were soft and gentle, like the petals of a Qingxin flower on a warm Spring day.

All too soon, the moment faded as Chongyun pulled away. A dreamy smile danced across his face, as if he was lost in a mirage of stars. “Bookworm," he cooed.

And then he faltered. His eyes fluttered shut, and he went limp, hitting the sleeping roll with a dull thud.

At first Xingqiu just stared at Chongyun, frozen in place. Chongyun had just…had he really? It all happened so fast, Xingqiu wasn’t sure if he imagined it all. He held a finger to his own lips slowly, the ghost of Chongyun’s kiss lingering on his face.

From his spot on the roll, Chongyun groaned. That broke Xingqiu’s daze. He shook his head and did his best to focus on his friend in front of him. It wasn’t easy, his limbs felt light and tingly, and his mind kept floating back to the kiss.

“What’s wrong? Are you in pain?” he asked hesitantly.

Chongyun’s brows furrowed. His eyes were shut tight, and his hair stuck to his forehead with sweat. “Hot,” he mumbled. “Too warm.”

“You have a fever,” Xingqiu told him. He picked the cloth up from where he left it earlier. “Stay here. I'll return shortly.”

He got up and soaked the cloth in fresh snow. When he returned Chongyun lay in the same place he left him, face contorted in discomfort. Xingqiu set the cloth on his forehead and he immediately relaxed. “Thank you,” he mumbled. And then he was silent. His breathing steadied, and Xingqiu could tell he had fallen asleep.

He stroked Chongyun’s hair slowly, a late rush of adrenaline pulsing through his body. The short conversation and the kiss played through his mind over and over. As shocked and confused as he was, Xingqiu was elated. Far beyond elated. Because Chongyun had kissed him, he had kissed Xingqiu. The world glittered like a dream, and Xingqiu floated along, weightless.

Did this mean Chongyun liked him back? All of Xingqiu's confusion and frustration, would it actually amount to something?

Or was the kiss just a spur-of-the-moment thing, fueled only by Chongyun’s congenital positivity? Chongyun had a fever, so this wouldn't be the first time his excess of Yang energy made him do something he didn't mean.

Would Chongyun even remember the kiss?

Xingqiu felt a pang in his chest, the light feeling in his body suddenly becoming a lot heavier. The cheery crackle of the fire seemed to press in on him now, mocking.

 

“We’re back!” A voice sang at the mouth of the cave.

Xingqiu spun around, hand jerking away from Chongyun’s head as blush started to climb up his cheeks.

Xiangling waved at him from just outside the cave, as perky as ever and carrying a bag full of...something. Albedo stood behind her, his pack filled with what was probably starsilver. “Any developments?” he asked, gesturing to Chongyun.

Xingqiu bit his lip. “He woke up." Xiangling made a surprised sound. Albedo seemed unfazed. "Just for a moment, though. I am not even sure he'll remember it later.”

“Did he say anything while he was awake?”

Xingqiu nodded. “He asked where we were, and then complained about his fever.” And he kissed me. “He’s, ah, very…sensitive to high temperatures. I am not sure if that made him pass out or if he simply fell asleep on his own.”

Albedo paused to think for a few moments. "Whatever the case, the best we can do right now is keep an eye on him. Make sure he stays hydrated and keep his fever down.”

And so they did. For days, Xiangling and Xingqiu stayed in Albedo’s little camp, waiting for Chongyun’s fever to break. Chongyun remained asleep most of the time, but when he did wake he was delirious.

At first, Xingqiu mainly took care of him. In his feverish state, Chongyun was surprisingly clingy. Each time he saw Xingqiu he reached out for his hand, a small pout forming on his lips. Archons, that pout, with his rosy cheeks and fluffy hair, Xingqiu swore Chongyun was trying to give him a heart attack.

Even so, he did his best to care for his friend, gently dabbing at his forehead with a wet cloth as he spoke in hushed tones to the Cryo user. But on the third day of his fever, Chongyun suddenly sat up and tapped Xingqiu’s nose lightly with the tip of his finger. He wore that same dreamy look as he did right after the kiss and—oh, Xingqiu couldn’t take it anymore.

He asked Xiangling to take over. Chongyun was just…too confusing. After Xiangling agreed, Xingqiu glanced apologetically at the exorcist. He tried to ignore the swarm of butterflies in his stomach as Chongyun smiled back.

 

Chongyun's fever dragged on for eight long days, far longer than any normal person's would last. On the evening of the eighth day, it finally broke. By the ninth day, he was nearly feeling himself again. That is to say, he no longer tried to cling on to Xingqiu whenever he saw him. He was back to being shy and reserved, the familiar Chongyun that Xingqiu had known for years.

At one point, Xiangling asked Chongyun if he remembered anything about the past week. Xingqiu, who hadn't told anyone about the kiss (or the nose tap, or anything) pretended to read another one of Albedo's journals as he listened intently to the conversation.

"I—I don't think so." Xingqiu heard Chongyun pause, and he imagined his face scrunched up in concentration. "I might remember some moments, but they're blurry. Why? Did I do something?"

So Chongyun really didn't remember. An odd feeling spread through Xingqiu’s body. He wasn’t quite sure if it was a bad or good one.

“No, no!” Xiangling rushed to reassure Chongyun. Her light tone seemed to mock Xingqiu’s cloudy thoughts. “I was just wondering, that’s all. Don’t worry; I think the most interesting thing you did was mumble something about books in your sleep once. Xingqiu's influence must be getting to you," she giggled.

Heat pulsed through Xingqiu’s cheeks, and he was suddenly glad the journal blocked his face from view. For the hundredth time that day, he thought of the kiss. Bookworm, Chongyun had said then, with hazy eyes and dreamy lips. Even now, a week later, the memory sent butterflies coursing through Xingqiu.

“Oh,” was all Chongyun said. From there the conversation died off, leaving Xingqiu with only a strange feeling in his heart and a sudden inability to concentrate on his book.

And that, surely, was the irony of it all. An author so starstruck that he was unable to read.

Rendered useless by love.

Chapter 3

Summary:

When he spoke, his words were like the stars.

 

"Dear Chongyun, I've never been more sure of anything in my life."

Notes:

hi guys! finally made it to the last chapter.i tried to get this out on chongyuns birthday but that didn't happen oops so happy late birthday chongyun <3

On the tenth day in Albedo’s camp, Chongyun finally felt well enough to make the trip down the mountain. It was a good day to do so; the wind had dialed down, and the clouds had thinned just enough so a blurry sun could peak out through the grayness.

They decided to set out after breakfast. With Albedo leading the way, they arrived at the base of Dragonspine in only a few hours, with almost no trouble. Albedo told them they were on the Northwest side of the mountain, directly East of Stone Gate.

Relief flooded through Xingqiu when leafy trees and green grass came into view in the distance. It was the first time any of them had seen grass in over a week, and the bright color felt strange to see. Xingqiu even blinked a few extra times to make sure his eyes were working properly.

“Well, this is where we part ways,” Albedo said once they reached the base of the mountain.

Chongyun, still flustered that he had taken up the alchemist's living space for over a week, bowed deeply and thanked him profusely for his hospitality. Xingqiu promised Albedo that he would send reimbursements for the time and materials they'd used, but Albedo politely declined.

“Mr. Kreideprinz, I insist you allow me to—”

“No need,” Albedo cut him off. “Just make it home safe.”

They all said a final goodbye, and then the alchemist turned and started back up Dragonspine. Xingqiu and Xiangling turned to leave as well, but Chongyun stood frozen facing the mountain. He had a look on his face that Xingqiu recognized all too well. Chongyun gazed at Dragonspine as if he had failed it.

“Chongyun,” Xingqiu said with a gentle voice. “Let’s go.”

Chongyun gave a slow nod, and then turned toward them. He must have seen his friends' concerned expressions, because he tried to give them a reassuring smile. It didn't reach his eyes.

Xingqiu knew Chongyun was thinking about the exorcism. After all, he never ended up catching whatever spirit was up there, if it was even real. Usually, now was when Xingqiu would treat him to dinner to cheer him up, but before that, they just needed to get home.

"I should be on my way too," Xiangling piped up. "I still have some herb gathering to do before I leave Mondstat. You two go home, I'll only be another day or two."

Chongyun opened his mouth to protest but Xiangling cut him off before he could speak. "Especially you. You need to go home and rest."

Chongyun still looked like he wanted to argue, but closed his mouth anyways. "Just be safe, alright?" he said.

Xiangling smiled. "I could say the same about you. I hope you learned your lesson about climbing dangerous mountains alone." Chongyun reddened, and she giggled. "Remember, when I get back I'm going to cook us all a biiig meal, just you two wait!" She waved goodbye, then turned and set off down the North road toward Mondstat.

Which meant Xingqiu and Chongyun were now alone together for the next few days.

Xingqiu glanced at Chongyun, then quickly glanced down when he realized Chongyun was looking at him too. He cleared his throat, eyes trained on the ground. "Shall we be on our way?"

Chongyun nodded. "We should be able to get to Stone Gate by sunset. We can camp there for the night."

 

The next few hours passed smoothly. As the pair journeyed through Mondstat, Xingqiu passed time by telling Chongyun about what he read in Albedo's journals. Chongyun listened intently; although he wasn’t really interested in the journals’ contents, he loved it when Xingqiu talked about books. The Hydro user always got this sparkle in his eyes and a spring in his step, and it never failed to make Chongyun smile.

As predicted, they made it to Stone Gate just as the sun had started to set. Perfect timing too, as Chongyun couldn't ignore the way his own feet dragged for much longer. A normal journey would have been tiring, but adding on the fact that this was a full day of hiking after being bedridden for more than a week, well, Chongyun was beyond exhausted.

They climbed the wooden steps and found a bench overlooking Guili Plains. Wangshu Inn stood proud in the distance. Its lanterns flickered playfully in the evening air, dozens of dancing fireflies.

Below Wangshu, the dazzling sunset shimmered off the shallow lakes, bathing the world in pink and orange from every direction.

"Let us rest here," Xingqiu suggested. Chongyun didn't have to be told twice. He set his bag down and sank onto a nearby bench. Xingqiu sat down as well, but left quite a bit of space between them.

Chongyun noticed Xingqiu had been doing that a lot recently. Especially since their journey down Dragonspine, he seemed much more distant. He’d become quieter, and always a step too far away.

Chongyun didn’t understand. Xingqiu almost seemed… uncomfortable around him now. Did Chongyun do something? He must have, right? Why else would Xingqiu be acting strange?

Or maybe Chongyun was just overthinking again. Preoccupied as always.

He sighed and closed his eyes, focusing on the fresh breeze and the sounds of crickets starting to chirp somewhere in the distance. Chongyun wasn't a fan of hot weather, but this wasn't bad at all. The wind was cool against his skin, bringing with it the scent of Qingxin flowers and another fresh herb he couldn't quite place.

It was nice here, especially after the whole fiasco in Dragonspine. Chongyun knew it was dangerous to dream, but he couldn't help but wish for this moment to last a little longer. He glanced at Xingqiu, and something panged through his heart.

Bathed in the soft colors of the sunset, Xingqiu looked stunning. Regal and elegant, he seemed to radiate light himself. But there was something missing, something Chongyun realized had been missing for a while. Xingqiu's pride was gone. Or at least, hidden deeper now. He hesitated more, held his head lower than he used to.

Chongyun wondered if it was his fault Xingqiu had become like this.

 

They sat in silence for a while, too worn out to start a conversation. Somewhere in the silence Chongyun's thoughts drifted from Xingqiu to Dragonspine.

He'd travelled all that way only to fail. Again.

Chongyun clenched his fist, fingernails digging into the palm of his hand. His thoughts started to tumble out of control, mind pulling him in a million different directions. He didn't notice Xingqiu getting up until his friend spoke. The words slashed through Chongyun's stormy thoughts like a knife, jolting him back to reality.

"Is something the matter?"

Chongyun sighed, standing up slowly. “Nothing. It’s just…I promised myself I wouldn’t leave Dragonspine until I completed that exorcism. It looks like I failed again.”

Silence for a moment. “It's alright,” Xingqiu said. “You'll have other opportunities.”

“I know that,” Chongyun said, the words coming out a little harsher than he meant to. “But I was so sure of this one. Leads from multiple sources, all telling the typical signs of a ghost. But when I was up there, I didn’t sense a single thing. I stayed in that lake for hours; my Yang energy should have been suppressed. I don’t understand…”

Pure shock flashed across Xingqiu’s face. “You mean to say you were in that lake on purpose?”

Pink crept up Chongyun’s cheeks. “I—Yes," he admitted. "I thought the cold would be enough to suppress my Yang energy. That’s why I took my coat off too."

Xingqiu’s mouth hung open for a moment, before anger suddenly flared through his being. He took a step toward Chongyun. “Why would you ever do that?” His words stung like a slap. “Are you aware of how worried I was when we found you? No coat, no sword, we thought you had been attacked!”

Chongyun cringed. “Xingqiu—”

Xingqiu cut him off. “Passed out on the side of the lake like that, for Archons know how long!” He faltered, and his voice became small. “Your skin was so blue, I was certain you had…” He trailed off.

Guilt flooded through Chongyun. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you worry. But at this point, I didn’t know what else to do. It was the only way.”

Chongyun had spent his entire life trying to find ways to rid himself of his congenital positivity. Or at least alleviate the symptoms enough. He’d tried everything, everything, and yet he still barely saw any progress.

When he was a kid, his family members praised his excess Yang energy. They treated it like a blessing, as if it was something to be jealous of. Yes, being a famous exorcist would be nice, but more than that Chongyun just wanted to be normal.

Because simply existing, simply trying to remain in control of his own body, it was a constant battle. Chongyun was always so diligent, he always did everything he could to balance his body and mind, yet he was still so prone to his Yang spirit taking over.

That part terrified him the most. Always at the mercy of his own body, he lived in constant fear that he might lose control, that he might hurt someone. And he couldn’t do anything to stop himself if that happened. But that only meant he wasn't trying hard enough, right?

Each episode Chongyun had only convinced him further; he was far from sufficient. An exorcist who couldn’t go out in the sun, who’d never even seen a ghost before? Really, how pathetic was he?

Surely, it was his fault he was like this.

Maybe that was why he made such a risky plan up on Dragonspine. He needed to see how much he could take, how far he had to go before he was finally in control.

“‘The only way?’” Xingqiu repeated, the anger gone from his voice. “What do you mean by that?”

Shit. Chongyun didn’t mean to share that. Xingqiu’s shouting overwhelmed his senses, and he’d spoken before he could stop himself.

Impulsive as ever, something whispered in his ear. Little exorcist, will you ever learn?

Chongyun took a shaky breath. “I feel like I’ve tried everything to alleviate my condition. But I still have never seen a spirit. So I guess I thought, what else was there to try?”

He gave an awkward laugh, waiting for Xingqiu to say something. The Hydro user didn’t, instead he just sat quietly, patiently waiting to hear more.

“We've been friends since we were kids, so you know how my congenital positivity is,” Chongyun continued, speaking carefully. “I try so hard to suppress my Yang energy, but nothing seems to work. For Archons’ sake, it's my own body, but I'm constantly at war with it. I'm terrified of losing control. Always. A-And dealing with that, day after day, it’s…” He shook his head, slumping back down on the bench.

“Draining?” Xingqiu offered. He followed Chongyun's lead and sat down next to him. Really next to him this time, not an arm’s length away. He was right by Chongyun's side.

Chongyun suddenly felt the urge to reach out and grab Xingqiu’s hand. His heart skipped a beat at the thought and he gulped, feeling heat start to bubble in his chest.

Chongyun and Xingqiu. Like that would ever happen. With Chongyun at the mercy of his congenital positivity, there was no chance he could ever be a good boyfriend. Even as just friends, Xingqiu always seemed to have to look after him, to clean up his messes like he was some kind of child. If they started dating, well…

No, Chongyun didn't want that. Until he found a way to rid himself of his Yang energy, he would just be a burden. Xingqiu shouldn't have to deal with all of his problems. Xingqiu deserved better.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Incredibly draining. I’ve missed so much in life. You and Xiangling are really the only friends I've ever had. Not to mention all the chances at love I miss out on."

"Love?" Xingqiu interrupted.

Heat flushed through Chongyun. "I, um…" Why did he admit that? To Xingqiu of all people?

"Chongyun." Xingqiu looked straight at him now, his expression completely serious. More than that, he seemed almost… shy. "Are you in love?"

The world stilled. Chongyun looked into Xingqiu's eyes. In the setting sun, they held all the colors of the world, a dazzling mirage of gold and pink and blue. On instinct, Chongyun reached for the tassel at his side. The tassel Xingqiu had given him all those years ago.

You will be the greatest exorcist in Teyvat, Xingqiu had said back then, as he pressed the tassel into Chongyun's hands. I am sure of it.

The breeze brushed past them, lifting Chongyun's heart into the sky. Blood pulsed in his ears, hot and loud.

The words flew out of his mouth before he could stop them. "Yes," he heard himself say. "I'm in love with someone whom I don't even deserve. He’s smart and funny and has never stopped believing in me, not once. And I…I’m just…”

He felt a hand rest on his, gentle. “Do you truly think he would agree with you on that?” Xingqiu asked softly. Just below his words hung a deep sorrow, it left an intangible heaviness in Chongyun's chest. “Would he really believe you are not enough?”

Chongyun turned to face Xingqiu. He couldn’t help but feel weak, broken. "But, with my congenital positivity. Are you really sure you want to—"

A pair of lips cut him off. The moment a soft spark igniting into a brilliant flame. For a beautiful, lovely instant, the world was just him and Xingqiu, together under the golden pink sky.

Xingqiu pulled away, just for a moment, gazing into Chongyun’s eyes. He gave a sweet, rosey smile, as warm and comforting as the summer night around them. When he spoke, his words were like the stars.

"Dear Chongyun, I've never been more sure of anything in my life."

Heat blazed inside Chongyun. But this time it wasn't agitated or dreadful, it burned warm and welcoming and genuine. For the first time in his life, he felt that this was truly him, not another part taking over.

He returned Xingqiu's kiss, and maybe some of the heat found a way into his lips. Through it Chongyun weaved passion and love and everything he had been waiting to tell Xingqiu, everything he'd been too afraid to say. As soon as their lips met, months of torment and anguish evaporated, now worries of the past. Chongyun had never been good at reading people, but this time he was confident Xingqiu felt the same.

Right now, aureate as the dazzling sunset around them, they were weightless. They were free.

When they finally pulled away, Xingqiu had a playful smirk on his face. "Finally. I had started to believe I would never encounter the chance to kiss you back."

"Kiss me back?" What was that supposed to mean? Chongyun and Xingqiu had never kissed before.

Xingqiu cocked his head to the side. His amber eyes glinted with a mix of emotions. Amusement, but also something sadder, rawer. “You really do not remember?” Xingqiu asked.

“Remember what?”

Xingqiu stilled, smiling with that same strange mix of emotions that swam in his eyes. “Back on Dragonspine, on the very first day of your fever. You kissed me.”

What? A deep red seared through Chongyun's face. He studied Xingqiu up and down, sure this was another one of his pranks. But the Hydro user was completely and utterly serious. “No, I—Oh Archons.” Chongyun buried his face in his hands, feeling dumber than ever before. “I’m so sorry.”

A gentle hand rested on his leg, and he looked back up. “It’s alright,” Xingqiu said. “Really, it is. In a strange way, I am honestly glad you did.” He dropped his gaze, fiddling with the tassel hanging from his own Vision. Xingqiu had always taken great care of the gift, and after all these years, the amber inside still gleamed as proud as ever.

“Recently, I’ve been so confused,” he said softly. “As strong as my feelings were for you, I had no way of knowing how you felt of me. But your kiss was clarity, no matter how it made me feel at first.”

Once again, guilt coursed through Chongyun. “I’m sorry,” he murmured.

"What for?” Xingqiu asked, voice tinged with sadness. His eyes were trained on the sunset. “For being in love?”

“No,” Chongyun grabbed Xingqiu’s hand from his leg and held it firmly in his own. “I mean I'm sorry for confusing you. That was never my intention and I—I’ve loved you for months, Xingqiu. I was just too afraid to show it.”

At this Xingqiu smiled. “What would we humans be if not confusing? It is simply in our nature.” He nudged a little closer and rested his head against Chongyun’s shoulder. "And it is nothing to apologize for."

Though a little startled, Chongyun wrapped his arm around Xingqiu anyways. It was strange how natural this felt, like they were made to hold each other. Like this was something they'd already done a thousand times over.

Xingqiu snuggled a little closer and sighed contently, turning his gaze toward the sky. Chongyun looked outward too, at the beautiful scene in front of them.

The last traces of the sun had just dipped below the horizon, fading the gold of the clouds into a deep purple. Stars winked into the new night, taking watch over the two from above. Around the boys, the quiet buzz of crickets and frogs floated lazily through the summer air, reminding them that they were home.

Home, thought Chongyun. Yes, he was home. Watching the stars with the one he loved, spending the evening in each other's arms. Inside Chongyun, something had changed.

Years and years ago, Chongyun closed himself off to the world. No matter how much he knew it was for everyone's safety—for his own safety—he couldn't shake the aching in his heart, the feeling that something was snatched away from him. He'd been left empty and dull, tormented by the loneliness he'd condemned onto himself.

But now, for the first time in his life, Chongyun felt complete. Now, the world was clearer. He could hold his head a little higher. And he could smile with all the warmth and love that he'd been waiting to truly feel all his life.

Home.

He hugged Xingqiu a little closer. “I love you,” he mumbled. The words had been waiting to leave his lips for months. And he meant them with his whole heart.

A warm spot against his chest, Xingqiu smiled. “I love you too.”

Notes:

hope you enjoyed this story, it got me back into writing and it was so fun as my first genshin fic. also i read every comment you guys leave and although i haven't rly responded to them in this fic just know i appreciate them so much, they literally make my day.

thank you guys!!

edit: i have since posted another xingyun fic, its not as happy as this one but if u enjoyed this consider checking it out! hehe