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The Traveler is Kindove Weird

Summary:

Humans are weird one shots based on the travelers
(some chapters feature aether, lumine, or both! Some have them be an ambiguous character.) Feel free to leave suggestions for future one shots :D

LATEST CHAPTER: inventory, stamina, and teen beach movie physics. AKA citizens of teyvat think about how physics seems to mold to the traveler's liking

Notes:

*crawls out of genshin hole*

*wrenches self up from genshin impact hole* hey so
As a fan of the "humans are weird" genre, i was very disappointed by the lack of it in this Fandom. So much so that I have caved and,, am gonna write about it cuz of no one will do it I will
Like the traveler is literally from all over the place?? Ofc they would have weird customs that just did NOT make any sense
So ye, do enjoy ~
These are mostly gonna be one shots but all connected chapters will have a little number next to their name to make it easier! B)

This has not been betaed

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: adrenaline and statue healing

Chapter Text



The crowd watched, mouths agape and grim as the housekeeping head from the Kamisato estate was forced on his knees. Thoma looked on at them, head held high as he stared disdainfully up at the statue.

The almighty shogun did not even give him a glance, her back turned towards him. She lifted her hand, Thoma's vision rattling between its ropes before suddenly- it was up in the air.

And just as quickly, the Traveler was there. He reached his hand up, snatching the vision and lifted Thoma while sprinting. He had no destination in mind, just that he needed to get the hell out of there.

"T-traveler, slow DOWN! TREE, TREE -!" They both skidded to a stop, panting. Paimon trailed behind them (how she was out of breath even though she flew was beside him..)

She yelped, "Traveler!"
He looked at her, "Yeah?"
"Your-your leg!"
Ohh. Ohhhuhh.
So thats where the numbness was coming from! Apparently, he had smacked his leg into something which left a nasty bruise and when he moved his leg he could definitely tell something was fractured (if not broken already.)

Suddenly, he felt his body's energy wear out and he dropped. Yeah,, fighting all those bosses and his commission then sorting out this whole vision hunt thing-it was no wonder he was tired.
"Oh damn." he hissed. 


Thoma fussed over him, already wrapping some gauze he had on hand (perks of being the head of the Kamisato housekeeping), which he used to wrap around his leg and prevent any more breakage. 
"Its a miracle you could walk on this thing, no less run." Thoma remarked, "I've never seen anyone do that before. You must have really high pain tolerence, huh?"

He thought about it for a second- "Nah. Not really. This is all adrenaline, I'm probably going to be in some real pain if we don't bring me to a statue before I crash completely."
Paimon piped up, "Ad-ren-a-line? What's that?"
"Otherworlder thing! Basically it unlocks like, all my strength."
"Uhhhhh," Thoma felt very out of the loop. But he decided to just go with it. "Right. Wouldn't you want that strength all the time??"

The traveler slouched, grinning, "Heh. Nah. If I did I would probably tear all my muscles up and would be in a lot of pain. Good thing that can't happen!" his eyes started to slip shut, "Anyway. Take me to a statue I am...going to.."

THunk!

Ah. He was absolutely passed out.

Thoma turned to the weird emergency food pixie, "Shouldn't we take him to a medic? This wound is serious! It could seriously impair his ability to walk for a while."

Paimon chuffed at him- cheekily, she gave her remark "Nope! Just put him near a Statue of the Seven! He will be better there." Thoma picked up the traveler, hooking his arms under their legs and head. "A-are you sure??"

"Are you doubting the Paimon?"
"O-of course not, haha? Let's go then!"

Later on, Thoma watched as the traveler's leg mended itself together and the bruises disappeared from their body.

What.

There was a lot of questions he wanted to ask, but given the fact that the second the traveler woke up he gave Thoma a" let's not speak of this "look, he decided to drop it for now.

" Hahh, Paimon remembers when Paimon had to bring you here after you fought Azdaha the first few times!"
" AHH! SHH, Paimon. Let's not speak of thattt. " He hit her upside the head gently, laughing.

Azdaha?? The giant dragon thing from myth??

.. What do they mean by" the first few times"????