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“You should do it?”
“Hmm?”
“I’m not gonna do it,” Steve said with a note of finality in his voice. “I think you should.”
“They’re just dishes, Steve,” Bucky said distractedly. “I’ll do ‘em this time but you can’t pout your way out of them forever,” he mumbled around the red pen between his teeth and absently tucked a long strand of hair behind his ear. He had been growing it out for about a year and a half and it was long past that awkward length.
Bucky was under a tough time constraint. They had taken time off for their... honeymoon, and now he was behind in his work because he usually never took personal time. Now he had to finish the piece he had been working on prior to... The Atrocity so it could be passed on to the orchestra to learn. And right now he was trying to get the last movement just right but it wasn't coming together as easily with the rest of the concerto. It was fighting him.
“M’not talkin’ ‘bout the dishes, Buck.”
Something in his tone caught Bucky’s attention. The set of his jaw held it. Bucky set his sheet music down on the coffee table alongside his red pen and gave his husband his undivided attention.
“Sorry, my mind’s a million miles away. What are we talking about Steve?”
Steve sighed and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, suddenly finding the living room floor fascinating. “Babies, Buck. I think they should be your kids. I don’t think it’s a good idea if they’re mine.”
“First of all,” Bucky growled through clenched teeth, “any children we have, be it surrogacy or adoption, they are going to be our kids, otherwise why bother?” Bucky’s work stressed mind went into overdrive and became a marital stressed mind.
“No, hey, hey, Buck,” Steve interrupted before he could get too worked up. “I misspoke, luv, I misspoke. I didn’t mean it the way it came out,” he tried to explain.
“Then what did you mean, Steven?” Bucky asked after taking several deep breaths.
“Like I said, I think you should be the one to donate. They’ll be mine in every sense of the word possible, I just think it would be better if, you know, you donated.”
“What? Why? Not that I don’t want to. But why don’t you want to?” Bucky was genuinely frustrated and bewildered. When they had talked about the possibility of children, Steve had been ecstatic. The thought of having a true family had nearly driven him to tears. They talked about adoption and surrogacy and Bucky never got the feeling Steve was opposed to donating for at least one child. The exact opposite, in fact.
“It’s not that I don’t want to, believe me, I do. And if it were just us I wouldn’t hesitate. But it isn’t just us. It’ll always be us, and Ross, and Hydra, and AIM, and any other fanatic looking to get their hands on the serum. We’ll have a hard enough time keeping them away from any children we have; someone will always be looking for leverage against me and the Avengers. But there isn’t much people wouldn’t do if they thought they had a chance at the serum.”
Bucky was silent for a moment. He knew it was a valid concern because everything Steve said was true. But that didn’t stop his heart from breaking any less. Turning to his husband, Bucky took his hands in his own, running his thumbs across broad knuckles.
“Steve, when you were a little kid no one thought your genetics should be passed on. And I understand and agree with your concerns for our future children.” His heart broke even more at the devastated look in those stunningly deep blue eyes but he continued. “But we can’t control what other people are gonna do no matter how hard we try to keep our kids safe. All we can do is try. But I think it’s a mistake to let what others might do in the future govern our choices now.
“When I think of my family it’s always my sister, Becca, my mom and dad, Winnie and George. Now that picture’s expanded to include you,” he squeezed Steve’s hand, sharing as much love through touch as he could. “And I’m sure in time, that picture will include your teammates. But for you, it’s...complicated. The Barnes’ are your family. And the Avengers are your family. But you Steve, are the last link to Sarah and Joseph Rogers. The last link in the whole world. I think when we have a baby, you should donate and let that link continue. Let that goodness grow again in this modern world.”
Steve could barely see from the tears flooding his eyes. He could barely hear because of the heartbeat pounding in his ears. He could barely breathe, choking on the overwhelming feeling of loss and love threatening to strangle him. He wanted his parents. He missed his Ma. He needed her arms around him, her soft lilt whispering in his ear. He missed her every single day and being reminded that he was the end of their memory, of her memory, hurt so badly.
Growing up he never thought he’d live to see thirty. Then, he was sure he would end up alone because of his sexuality and the laws of bigots. Now, not only was he married to the man of his dreams, that man wanted to have his babies; wanted Steve’s parents to be remembered.
Steve clung to Bucky and cried, something he hadn’t done in ages. He cried for all of the people he’d lost, for all of the changes forced on him, for all of the things he’d missed. He cried out the tension and stress that built and built; the pressure that he had pushed down and refused to acknowledge even before he went into the ice. He cried for the people he’d left behind that only knew poverty and sickness. He cried for the people he couldn’t save and the people he’d let down. Steve cried until he was an emotionally empty shell and had nothing left to give.
And Bucky held him through it all.
&&&
Steve wasn’t usually one to nap. The serum made it pretty unnecessary, always giving him too much energy to rest in the middle of the day. So when Steve woke in the dark it was slow and disorienting. His eyes felt puffy and the fabric underneath his mouth was damp. Damn was he drooling? Fumbling in an attempt to sit up, which was weird for him because he was usually much more graceful, it took him a second to realize he was in his living room in the tower. Their living room. Where was Bucky?
Steve rolled off the couch, managing to not get his feet tangled in the throw blanket kicked to the bottom, and headed for the light. He could hear soft music and humming coming from the kitchen, and if the accompanying smells were anything to go by, Bucky was making Eggplant Parmesan. His mom’s recipe.
Stumbling quietly into the kitchen, Steve watched as Bucky moved gracefully around his workspace, hips undulating and rolling to the beat. His hair, which Steve was obsessed with and had been ever since he started growing it out, was swaying above his shoulders in lush chocolate waves, making Steve's fingers itch to get in there. He took their casserole dish out of the oven with his metal hand, not a potholder in sight, and placed it on the butcher block to cool. As he fanned it with a little dish towel, Bucky did a little bend at the waist and shook his ass, really fast. Steve had no idea how he made his ass cheeks clap like that but he really loved when Bucky did the shimmy thing. With his back to the door, he missed Steve’s reverent look of lust and adoration.
God, this man was everything.
Bucky was humming along to whatever JARVIS was streaming for him, doing his best booty poppin’ when he felt a pair of strong, solid arms wrap around him from behind. He startled for a second, expecting Steve to still be out on the couch, but quickly settled back into the warm embrace. No creepy villain was getting past JARVIS and Steve Rogers, even if he was sleeping. If someone was attacking him, it was with comfort and love. Reaching up to hold onto the arms wrapped around his chest, Bucky leaned his head back into those broad shoulders, exposing his neck to his husband’s gentle attack.
“How are you feeling?”
“Drained, but good. Thank you.”
“You don’t have anything to thank me for, baby doll. Heat some plates in the microwave and we can start eating.”
Steve did as he was told and after divvying up the casserole onto the warmed up plates they dug in at the kitchen island.
“I was thinking while you were napping and I’ve got an idea. You’re either going to love it or hate it.”
“You mean like our honeymoon?” Steve asked with a smirk.
“The Atrocity will not be discussed in this house, Rogers.”
“C’mon, Buck. It wasn’t that ba-”
“If you finish that sentence, Steven Grant Rogers, we will never be having sex again.”
“The last time you full named me it was because we ruined your sweaters with jizz.”
Bucky set his fork down with a clatter. He wasn’t angry, per say, but there were several incidents in their shared relationship he tried very hard to pretend never happened and right now Steve was nailing them like a professional sniper at a county fair out to prove a point. “That is completely untrue. Your middle name was a favorite of mine many, many times during The Atrocity.” He really needed to trademark that. When Steve made the mistake of smiling at the reminder, Bucky continued. “Do you not remember the Dick Hunger Strike™, Steven? Did you want a refresher?”
“No, but I was hoping you’d finally be in the mood to discuss what happened o-”
“Not happening.”
“No wiggle room?”
At Bucky’s arched brow, he continued, “Okay then. Your idea. Let me hear it.”
Bucky took a second to switch gears. Bringing up the utter debacle that was their honeymoon made his eye twitch and his throat tighten up in an insane desire to yell and cry at the same time. Babies, they were talking about babies.
“I think we should have two babies, not necessarily at the same time, but I think we should choose a super powered mom.”
Steve blinked, “excuse me?”
“I want our kids to feel loved and safe. To know that neither is more special or more important than the other. Any child you help create will most likely have the serum. That means your ability to protect yourself. I don’t want one of our kids to be vulnerable in such a major way when we know they could end up targets. Since I’m not super powered, if the mother is, then our child will most likely have her abilities to defend themselves if the time comes. Both kids are special, neither feeling less than the other.”
“I think I like the idea. I'm not sure how I feel about genetically choosing our children, though," he mumbled, thinking about his childhood and the Eugenics surrounding the war.
"We are not trying to create the perfect person, Steve, We are giving our offspring the greatest chance of survival in our tumultuous lives. We are making sure one doesn't get to be 'special' and not the other. And most importantly, we won't love them any less because they don't meet some made up standard." Bucky gripped Steve's hand tightly to emphasize his point. "We aren't trying to create a certain skin tone or eye shade, baby. We are giving them defenses. And who knows. They might end up as normal as me and we will love them just as unconditionally.
"Of course we will," Steve said emphatically. "Okay, let’s make a list of possible surrogates,” Steve corrected himself, “ friends we think would be interested. It’s a pretty big commitment.”
“Yeah,” Bucky agreed quietly. They had some good people in their lives, but carrying a child for someone else, even if your friends are more like family, is a lot to ask anyone.
“Don’t worry, Buck. We’ll figure it out. But c’mon, let's get this cleaned up so we can start on that list. That's the first step.”
&&&
“I had originally thought of Becca. If she was our surrogate, our kid would be able to share both our blood in some fashion. But she’s so young and is just finishing her degree. She’s never had her own babies, which I’m only about 85% sure she even wants to have. I can’t ask her to give up her first.”
“I understand, Buck, and I’m sure she will too.”
As they sit cuddling in bed, they have a conversation that goes something like this:
Wanda *
“Isn’t she too young?”
“She’s two years older than you, Buck.”
“What? No way! She’s like 16!”
“She’s gonna kick your ass in the morning when she pulls that from your mind.”
“Oh shit!”
Jessica Drew *
“Isn’t that Spider-Woman?”
“Yeah. Think of her as a not-so-naive Parker. All his strengths but with more common sense. I’m pretty sure she’s as trained as Natasha.”
“Not a bad idea. Put her in the keeper pile.”
Storm
“How would we even ask her?”
“Isn’t she like royalty or something? Maybe T’Challa knows her?”
“I don’t know, Buck. She might be out of our league.”
“Bitch speak for yourself! ...but yeah you’re probably right.”
Emma Frost
“You can’t possibly trust her.”
“Well no, but you have to admit her powers are awesome.”
“We have to be able to trust her with our baby, Buck.”
“Yeah, yeah but…”
“Buck.”
“Diamond babies, Steve!”
“I know it’s the level of gay you aspire to be.”
“Diamond babies!”
Carol Danvers *
“She’s crazy strong Steve.”
“True, but I’m not sure how I feel about her taking off to outer space while pregnant with our baby. And I doubt she wants to spend nine months here.”
“All true but put her in the keeper pile anyway. If our babies can shoot cosmic rays out of their eyes we’ll be the coolest parents at play group.”
Jennifer Walters *
“That’s Bruce’s cousin, right? I thought you said you didn’t want them to feel different? Turning into mini Hulks would definitely be different.”
“I said different from each other. And besides, Jennifer’s only green like 95% of the time and doesn’t lose herself like Bruce. She’s badass and smart. Keeper pile please.”
Jane Foster
“Um...Bucky?”
“We’re not even sure she’s still with Thor. They’re so back and forth.”
“Okaaay, but you said it was about super-pow-”
“Do you realize how smart she is? Not everything is about brawn, Steven .”
“Pretty sure Thor would roast us alive anyway, James .”
“...Bitch.”
Rogue
“Do you think she would be interested?”
“Do you think she can?”
“No idea, but she’s definitely a keeper.”
“I don’t know, Buck. Kids can be energy suckers without it being their super power.”
“Damn, you’re right.”
Loki
“You’re kidding. Please tell me you’re kidding.”
“It’s a possibility depending on his sex at the time. I think we should at least think about it.”
“Oh God.”
“Imagine how badass, Stevie!”
Jessica Jones *
“Do you think she’d be willing to give up her PI work? Stop drinking?”
“No idea. We can always ask?”
“That wouldn’t be an awkward conversation or anything.”
“No matter who we ask, it’s going to be super awkward at some point.”
“Word.”
Brunhilde*
“I mean, c’mon Steve. Our baby could kick bad guys into the sun!”
“Same issues as Danvers and Jones. Would Valkyrie want to stay on Earth for nine months? Give up drinking for just as long?”
“Worth asking. What’s the worst that could happen?”
“She’s drunk, takes offense, and tries to pummel you to death?”
“You’re right. You should ask her, Stevie.”
Gamora *
“Are you just trying to have a green baby, buck?
“...Yes?”
“ Bucky !”
“Star Trek, Stevie! We could boldly go-”
Steve cuts him off with his lips.
“So we’ve narrowed it down to seven, eight if we could agree on Loki.”
“Not gonna happen, babe.”
“Damn you, Rogers.”
“You’ll thank me later, baby, promise. Now, let’s see if we can get a head start on baby making, shall we?”
“It doesn’t work that way and you know it you clown.”
“Oh I know, but we can try.”
After spending hours contemplating their list, having spectacular ‘we’re excited about a baby!’ sex, and passing out in a sticky, sated mess, Steve and Bucky decide to speak to the sharpest person they know. Pepper Potts. So first thing in the morning they head to Pepper’s office. She’s way too unflappable to show how confused she is to see them, but there’s no denying the surprise. Pepper could probably count on one hand the number of times any of the Avengers sought her out in her space. She usually went to them or spoke over the phone to save time.
“Steve. Bucky. What brings you guys up here?” She asked with a wide smile. Just because she wasn’t expecting it, doesn’t make their visit any less pleasant.
“Morning, Pepper. We were hoping you had a minute to spare. Your assistant sent us back, so…” Steve wasn’t sure how to finish. Even though Pepper had a way of putting him at ease, she was just such a classy dame that he usually felt like the guttersnipe he was back in the 40's. Like he should wipe his hands on a handkerchief before shaking hers.
“Of course Steve, I always have time for you guys.” At his raised brow she smiled and corrected herself. “Alright, almost always. Some days I don’t think I have time to even breathe! But today is not one of those days. What can I do for you?”
“Morning, Pepper,” Bucky greeted. “And I’m glad the day isn’t trying to do you in.”
“Good morning, Bucky, and it’s still early, yet. Let’s hope it stays that way,” she said with a laugh.
“From your lips to Tony’s ears?”
“Oh my god, let’s not tempt fate, shall we?” she said with a hearty eye roll. “Please, sit, and tell me what I can do for you both. Coffee?”
“No thank you,” they said at the same time, only for Steve to pick up the ball and explain their intrusion. Licking his lips he slid a quick glance over at his husband and tried not to squirm. It was one thing to talk about private stuff with Bucky and another to share your hopes and desires with someone else, regardless of how much like family they were.
“We want to have a baby.”
Pepper blinked. “Umm…”
If she were Nat, Steve would assume she was giving her opinion with that one tell. But with Pepper, Steve had to wait. She processed information through completely different filters than Natasha.
“I’m assuming you mean you’d like my help finding a surrogate and not that you want to have a baby with me specifically.”
“Oh my God, Steve! Why didn’t we consider Pepper? She’s smart and she’s so ruthless. She’s amazing!” Steve was going to have to figure out how Bucky managed to sound envious and disappointed at the same time.
“I did consider Pepper, Buck, but then I also considered Tony. If you can figure out a way to ask her without eating one of his repulsor beams, you let me know.”
“Stupid Tin-Man, with his stupid facial hair has to ruin everything,” Bucky grumbled sorely.
Trying not to focus on the super-powered blush spreading over her skin, Pepper cleared her throat and ignored the incredible complement as well as the childish insult.
“It’s okay baby, we have the list, remember?”
“Yeah but it’s not as good now.” Bucky wasn’t pouting. His lips did that naturally, okay?
“It’s still a great list, baby,” Steve said placatingly.
“Don’t try and placate me, Steve.”
“I would never, doll.”
“Punk.”
“Jerk.”
“So! Babies! What can I do? You said you had a list. May I see it?”
“Oh, uh, of course. Here.” Steve pulled a folded piece of paper out of his back pocket and passed it over to Pepper. “We made a list of the women we thought would make excellent surrogates. There’s a blue asterisk next to the ones we agreed on but we honestly have no idea if any of them would be interested or even how to contact some of them, so...” Steve trailed off as Pepper perused the names.
Pepper looked over the list and carefully kept her face neutral until she spotted one name in particular. “Loki?” She didn’t raise her voice but that was only due to the fact that she had been with Tony for close to a decade now and had learned to control her outbursts.
“Yes?”
“No?”
Steve looked over to Bucky who carefully kept looking at Pepper.
“Loki?” she tried again.
“Yes?”
“No, Buck.”
“But Stevie,” he whined.
“No, Buck.”
“I’m guessing you couldn’t come to an agreement.” Steve sees the little blue asterisk next to Loki’s name that had definitely not been there last night.
“We are in agreement. Loki will not be a surrogate for our children. Bucky’s just holding out hope that that decree will change.”
“Decree? Okay, King Rogers of Brooklynshire,” Bucky snarked.
“Fine. Poor choice of words, but c’mon, Buck. It’s not like I’m laying down the law here. I’m just using common sense and logic to determine who’d be a suitable surrogate. Loki isn’t trustworthy. We’d both be in a panic for nine months.”
“But his powers are so cool, Steve,” Bucky whined.
“Not the most important part and you know it. Now c’mon. Let’s forget about Loki and look at the options we already agreed on.” Bucky didn’t say anything but fully turned his attention to Pepper.
“Okay,” she said brightly. “Well, I know JARVIS can get contact information for Jessica Drew, Jessica Jones, and Jennifer Walters. I’ve never met them so I’ll send out a business email, requesting an audience. Maybe bypass Bruce on this. It’s bound to be pretty ...awkward for him; Jennifer being his cousin and all.”
“And Bruce being Bruce.”
Pepper being the lady Pepper is, means she didn’t agree with them out loud, instead giving a non-committal head nod and a sheepish smile.
“Now, how to get Thor’s attention? Clint did say that if you bug Heimdall enough, he’ll send a message to Thor just to get you to shut up. If you want his help maybe don’t do that. Thor is probably your only bet if you want to talk to Valkyrie. Brunhilde? You might want to figure that out before you ask her to have your children. You know what, I’ll just call Jane and ask her to get Thor’s attention. They are pretty close these days,” she said diplomatically.
“Now, Gamora will be the easiest for me to reach and I do have a lead on Danvers.”
“How can the two women out in the furthest reaches of space be easier to get a hold of than the three women living in a New York borough?”
“Remember last year's Christmas party? That’s when you actually met Gamora and the rest of the Guardians. Well, Rocket, the sentient raccoon is now besties with Tony. They literally talk at least once a week, usually more. I think Rhodey’s jealous but Bruce couldn’t be happier his attention is on someone else,” she whispered conspiratorially.
“On the raccoon?”
“Omg, Steve!" Bucky gasped. "He has a name! You can’t just call him a raccoon. He’s a sentient being from another world. Don’t be rude.”
“Sorry, sorry,” Steve surrendered immediately.
“Don’t worry about it, Steve. If Rocket were here he’d just sass right back and then try and steal Bucky’s arm,” Pepper laughed.
“Oh my God I remember him! That little shit did try and steal my arm when I was drunk!”
“Really, Buck?” Steve asked drily. “What happened to 'OMG! He's a sentient being with a name’?” Steve's voice went reedy and high, gasping dramatically.
“Not now Steven. That fucker tried to steal my arm!”
Pepper smiled and plowed on. “Well, I’m sure we can get a message to Gamora right away. But about Carol Danvers. You have two options and I don’t think you’re going to like either.” At their apprehensive look she continued. “You can call Nick Fury. He has her pager number.”
Bucky actually snorted but pulled it together when he noticed they weren’t laughing with him. “Oh, you were serious! Who the hell still has a pager?”
“Apparently, Danvers does and it works in space.”
“Come again?” Bucky asked, dumbfounded.
“Yeah, I don’t understand it either. But he can definitely get her to respond the fastest.”
“Sounds great. One question though. Why has no one given Thor one of these awesome 80’s miracles of technology?”
Steve’s eyebrows climb rapidly towards his hairline. “That’s… a really good question, Buck. One I intend to bring up at the next Avengers meeting. But Pepper said two options. What’s the second?”
“You can ask JARVIS to retrieve the signal her pager emits and send your own message.”
“That doesn’t sound bad.”
“Well either way you are going to have to ask Nick or Tony to help you contact her and that means you’ll have to explain what you need her for. Neither man will just do the favor without knowing why,” she said reluctantly, as though it were her fault.
“You mean neither pain in the ass will mind their own business and just contact her for us,” Steve muttered.
“That’s... not inaccurate.”
Very delicately said, Pepper.
At Steve and Bucky’s shared look, Pepper decided this was a good place to end the discussion and give the two men time to think about their next step.
“So I’m going to get a hold of Jessica Drew, Jessica Jones, Jennifer Walters, Gamora, and Brunhilde. I’m leaving you guys to talk to Wanda and decide how you’d like to proceed with Danvers.”
“Sounds good, Pepper. We’ll get back to you as soon as we’ve made a decision,” Steve said. “I do have another request, I’m sorry.”
“It’s not a problem Steve. I promise I’ll help however I can.”
“Thank you, pepper. I was hoping you’d be there when we talk to them. I know what we are asking is a big deal and very private, so I understand if it makes you too uncomfortable. But I think most of the women would feel more comfortable with another woman’s presence and I figured, everyone likes you, so…” Having no idea what else to say, Steve rubbed the back of his neck, sheepishly.
“That’s incredibly sweet of you to think of their comfort Steve and of course I’ll be there. Why don’t we all get back together when we’ve got a few meetings arranged and we’ll talk more.”
After Steve and Bucky got on the elevator and were headed back to their apartment, Bucky lamented, “Pepper would’ve been an awesome surrogate, Steve.”
“I know, baby, I’m sorry. C’mon, let’s go home and we can try again for a baby.”
“Steve,” was all he could giggle out before Steve pounced.
&&&
“Jennifer and both Jessicas refused to come to a meeting unless they knew what it was about so I had to tell them over the phone. Sorry, not my news to spread, I know, but I figured you’d want to speak to them as soon as possible so I explained the situation.
“Jennifer is out. Apparently a Celestial imbued her with something recently and it caused a...minor mutation. Jennifer’s almost the size of Bruce when he’s in Hulk form and isn’t really in ‘childbearing mode’. Her words, not mine,” Pepper said with a wince.
“Jessica Jones is also not an option. Her fiance Luke Cage was not overly happy about the proposition considering she’s engaged to him. She’s also already pregnant at the moment. Baby Danielle is due in just a few months.” Pepper spoke tightly while delivering that bit of news.
Awkward , Bucky thought. He was secretly glad he hadn’t been the one to have that particular conversation.
“And lastly, Jessica Drew. She didn’t say no outright. She asked for time to think, which I of course told her to take as long as she needed.” Pepper paused, thinking about what she wanted to say for a moment. “I think she has a past comparable to Natasha’s. I don’t believe she was red room trained, but there are a lot of uncomfortable similarities. If I had to make a guess, I would say it would be almost impossible for her to part with a child she carried. Maybe prepare yourselves for a no.”
She was trying to be delicate. In the business world she had to be decisive, clear and concise. Delicacy wasn’t really her thing. Diplomacy, sure, but putting things gently would get her drummed out of her own boardroom and replaced by some chauvinist piece of sh-
“On with the good news,” Pepper said, trying to lighten the mood. “I was able to get a hold of Gamora. She’s willing to do a video call whenever you’d like.”
“That really was fast.”
“I told you they talk all the time,” she said with a smile. “Tony was actually on a call with Rocket when I went down to his lab. Rocket brought her onto the call and I told her you’d like to speak with her. She was extremely surprised but agreed immediately. Just let JARVIS know when and he’ll place the call.”
“Nice.”
“And judging by how surprised Tony was, I’m guessing you haven’t decided about contacting Carol?”
“Actually,” Steve fidgeted in his seat, a slight flush spreading across his cheeks, “I spoke to Fury last night. He, uh... shut up Buck. He paged her, so we just have to wait for her to check in. He said it usually takes at least three days.” He turned to Bucky. “Dammit, will you stop laughing?”
“I'm missing a good story, here” Pepper said, with a very Tony smirk on her lips.
“Yeah, but I’ll be sure to tell you about it over an amazing Bourgogne and some excellent Olavidia from Spain,” Bucky said, still chuckling remembering Steve and Fury’s phone call the previous evening.
“I'm going to hold you to that. But in the meantime that means we have a call to make with Gamora and a small wait for Carol. Any word on Valkyrie? Have you spoken to Wanda?”
“I have. Wanda’s free Thursday, all day, which is perfect because Thor is coming and he’s bringing Valkyrie. I was thinking of taking them to lunch but then I thought it wasn’t really something to discuss in public. Any ideas?”
“How about you let me have lunch catered here at the tower? You can chat for a while, no pressure, no wait staff. We can use your floor and skip the common floor so no one decides to join us unexpectedly. Does that sound like it’ll work?”
“It sounds like you’re a lifesaver, Pepper. Thank you.”
“No need to thank me, Steve. Let’s hope you guys have an answer this time next week.”
&&&
“Steven! James!" Thor called with a mighty yell. He was dressed casually; no thought of battle other than Mjolnir hooked to the belt of his jeans. "It is wonderful to see you both again. It has been far too long. I have brought Valkyrie with me, as you’ve asked, and I have a message from Loki. He says he will happily fill in, in any way possible, if you need his help. I really think he quite enjoyed his last pregnancy.”
Steve’s head whipped around so fast Bucky was positive he heard something crack. He was also staring at Bucky, looking utterly betrayed. What the hell Steve?
“What the hell, Steve?”
“When did you ask Loki?”
“I didn’t! You and your stupid decree, remember?”
“Well clearly someon-”
“Be at ease, friend Steven. Heimdall informed me of your conversation and desire.”
Steve had the decency to look ashamed for believing the worst of Bucky. “Eavesdropping isn’t very cool, you know,” he muttered dully, trying not to look at his best guy.
“Neither is thinking shitty things about your husband ,” Bucky said cantankerously.
“Well, Heimdall did hear his name mentioned, sooo…” Thor explained to Steve, confused
Bucky caught Steve's guilty pout and couldn’t stay made. Especially when, for a mere split second, he had thought Steve had caved and called Loki himself. Even if it was something Bucky wanted, having Steve do it after giving Bucky shit about it was super douche.
“Whatever. He knows there’s no actual sex involved, right?”
“He understands how this works. His exact words were, ‘That’s because they have no idea how flexible I am. Their loss.’. But he is willing to help under your conditions if you so desire.”
“Um, thanks, Thor. We’ll... ah… think about it.”
“Of course.”
“Hey, quick question. Where’s your ice box? Because you know, drinks!” A soft and yet surprisingly aggressive voice sang in from a foot below the three gentlemen.
“Oh dear God.”
“Valkyrie? Why don’t I show you to the living room and we’ll get you something to drink. Now, do you go by Valkyrie or Brunhilde? We’ve all just been assuming and I hate to be rude.”
Thank God for Pepper.
&&&
“She said yes. I can’t believe she said yes,” Bucky said breathlessly. Not only was he riding the emotional high of knowing they’d be parents sooner rather than later, he was also riding his husband's amazing dick.
“I know, baby. I know,” Steve grunted out. Bucky felt so amazing clenching and sliding down his dick that he was finding it harder and harder to focus on words. All he knew in that moment was that he had to hold out, make his best guy cum first. The fact that Bucky wanted to talk must mean Steve wasn’t doing his job of making his husband incoherent well enough. With that thought in mind, Steve rolled them over and really put his back into it, plowing into Bucky again and again. Relishing every searing glide, the slap of bare skin on bare skin, the wet sounds his cock made with every thrust.
“Unh, unh, unh, ah God, Stevie. Please!”
“I’m close, Buck. M’so... close…”
Take it! Take me! Bucky wanted to scream but he couldn’t get the breath to do it. Couldn’t get his lungs to do anything other than sob in desperation and relief. As Steve continued to batter that sweetest of sweet spots hidden so deep inside, Bucky fell over the edge, convulsing and shaking apart in his husband's arms. And when he felt Steve flood his insides with that familiar, delicious heat, he gripped tighter at the broad sweaty back pinning him to the mattress. God he loved this man.
“We’re gonna have a baby, Stevie. We’re gonna have a baby,” he said wistfully.
Steve was floating in a state of utter bliss even as his chest was heaving, trying to drag air into his lungs. His body felt sluggish and heavy and all he wanted to do was cuddle up close to Bucky and sleep for a week. Or at least until he felt that delectable pull for his husband again. But Bucky’s softly spoken words yanked him off his cloud and slowly dragged him back to reality and his insecurities.
“What if we can’t do it, Buck? What if I can’t do it? I could hurt them, Buck. What if I say the wrong thing?” Steve huffed out a humorless laugh. “What do I mean, if? Of course I’m going to say the wrong thing! I’m a super soldier with no experience with kids. I had no experience with kids when I was one! What do I know about raising kids?”
Bucky took his husband’s face between his palms and gently kissed the frown away. He used his thumbs to sooth the furrowed brow and tenderly caress a sharp cheekbone. “Steve, baby, there are no guarantees when it comes to raising children. There’s no handbook, rule book, or test to pass. We could do everything ‘right’ and still end up doing everything wrong. All we can do is love them unconditionally and support them in every way we know how. We may not always get it right, but we can try.”
For the millionth time Steve looked into the face of the man he loved and couldn’t believe how lucky he was to have this man’s love in return. He thought about all of the moments in his life, moments he had bemoaned and railed against. He thought of all of the moments in his life that had to occur to get him to this moment.
He never felt luckier.
“But we can try,” he agreed.