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Naraku loved his job working at Walmart.
He loved it because most of the time, people shopping at Walmart were miserable. They were tired, overworked, underpaid, and generally disgruntled human beings. Not much unlike himself.
It was a glorious job.
It brought Naraku great pleasure to watch the miserable customers plowing through the store at the hand of life’s struggles. That was the case at the store pretty much all the time, except for one time of year.
Christmas
Fucking Christmas.
Naraku hated Christmas. Why? Because people were happy at Christmas. They came to his store full of life when they were supposed to be miserable . Buying gifts for friends and family. Searching for sales. Generally just being giddy and joyous and all that shit Naraku absolutely despised .
And this year would be the worst of all, it turned out. Naraku just didn’t know it yet.
“Naraku,” said the store manager, Bankotsu, one day. “I need to speak with you.”
Fuck. Naraku knew what this was about. He was the only male staff member that was old enough and tall enough to do a certain job around the holidays.
“You’re gonna be the Santa this year,” said Bankotsu with an uncaring sigh. “Check the calendar, and arrive early on that day. Just put on the costume, sit in the chair, and let the kids sit on your lap and tell you what they want for Christmas while their picture gets taken.”
Naraku wanted to complain, but he knew it wouldn’t do him any good. He needed this job, and fuck, he wanted to keep working in this miserable department store beyond the holiday season. The idea of dealing with a bunch of snot-nosed kids telling him what stupid toy they wanted for Christmas was not exactly something he was thrilled about doing, though.
“Yes, Bankotsu,” replied Naraku sarcastically, rolling his eyes. “It’s only for a day, right?”
“Just one,” replied Bankotsu, in a tone that sounded like he could care less about this whole Santa thing. “Just make the kids happy. Some other staff will help you as the elves. If you manage to do it without screwing up, you’ll get a handsome raise. So keep that in mind.”
Naraku growled to himself. The raise would be a pretty good thing…he and his husband, Sesshomaru, had been wanting to buy a house, rather than continue renting their apartment. Sesshomaru came from a reputable family, and having a regal house was extremely important to him. And they only needed just a little bit more to make a decent down payment.
“Oh, and Naraku?” said Bankotsu, his braid swinging as he turned to walk away. “Don’t make the kids cry like you did at Easter. They don’t need to know that none of this shit is real.”
“Whatever,” shrugged Naraku. “I guess if lying to kids is what the parents want these days…”
“Just do it, Naraku. You know as well as I do that we don’t have anyone else this year, and fuck if I’m going to let my store go to shit because of a Santa outfit. You’re as good as fired if you fuck this up. So keep that in the back of your mind.”
And so it was, that two weeks later, Naraku found himself in a padded red suit, sitting on a large, squashy chair with a white beard and a hat, a line of children and parents slowly forming to meet Santa Claus.
Those stupid little bastards all looked so goddamned happy, too. Fuck, it pissed Naraku off. The parents looked just as happy, admiring the fake fireplace and chatting with the store employees dressed as elves.
The photographer, Miroku, was extremely talkative with the stupid kids, making them smile as they were plopped onto Naraku’s lap. And once that happened, Naraku had to repeat his line. A line he would repeat over and over as the day wore on, with less and less enthusiasm each time (not that he had much to start with…).
“What do you want for Christmas?” Naraku spat to each kid, and despite the tone, each damn child was more than willing to tell him, a complete fucking stranger, what they wanted from a man who didn’t even goddamned exist anyway.
“A Barbie Dream House!”
“A Tonka Truck!”
“A Play-Doh Barber Shop!”
“An XBox!”
Naraku had to sit through this shit over. And over. And over again. Acting like he gave a shit what some kid wanted for Christmas. And after each kid told him, he’d have to take a picture with them. Fuck, how many people were going to have his goddamned picture in their house?
“You know,” sighed Miroku as Naraku kneed a kid off his lap as they happily trotted back to their parents, “you could at least try to look half-alive on the camera, Naraku. It’s Christmas, after all. The Santa visit is really important.”
“Not to me,” grouched Naraku. “I hate this crap. Christmas and everything that goes with it.”
“Well aren’t you a Grinch…” groaned Miroku. “Remind me never to take my kids to sit on your lap if you’re Santa…”
Naraku grew more and more grouchy as the day crawled on. Kid after kid. Want after want. Picture after picture.
“A pony!”
“A Power Wheels Jeep!”
Fuck, did it ever stop? Would he ever get out of this hell of these stupid kids and their-
“A dead raccoon!”
Naraku was smashed out of his train of thought at the words of the small girl on his lap. So much so that he felt the need to ask again, what, in fact, this damn kid wanted.
“A dead raccoon,” said the small girl with dark hair in a ponytail and brown eyes, who was wearing a red dress. “That’s what I want for Christmas!”
Naraku had expected to hear… many of the things that the filthy children wanted for Christmas. Toys and games and things Naraku himself despised. But…this little girl…certainly, she couldn’t be even remotely serious?
Naraku had not felt the urge to talk to a single child that day, other than dropping the line of asking them what they wanted for Christmas. It was at that moment Naraku realized he actually knew this girl.
Her name was Moroha, and she was Sesshomaru’s niece. The child of his half-demon brother and some human woman. It had been a while since he’d been forced to interact with the child, and had been so caught up in his ungodly job that day he didn’t initially recognize the figure on his lap.
Naraku didn’t know much about this offspring. Sesshomaru wasn’t exactly thrilled about spending time with his half-brother, and only did so when their father, Toga, insisted on it. Still though, Naraku couldn’t help but be intrigued by this child’s request.
“I…I suppose that’s possible …” said Naraku, not entirely knowing what the actual fuck to say. “Is…that what you really want?”
“Oh, yes, Santa!” squealed the girl. “I do!”
“But… why?” Naraku couldn’t help but ask.
“Because a dead raccoon is cool!” squeaked the girl. “They smell weird, and they look funny, and I can shake it in my mouth and growl!”
Naraku couldn’t help but be taken aback. He thought that he himself was the only person in this area, perhaps even in the entire world, that had a fascination for dead things. And yet here was a little girl - his niece by marriage, who seemed to be just as interested.
“I want one,” whispered Moroha, pointing to a dog-eared man with long silver hair, standing next to a human woman, “to give to my Daddy for Christmas, Santa. But it’s a surprise!”
Naraku couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Not only did this child want a dead raccoon, but she didn’t want it for herself . Why would someone ask for something so wonderful , only with the intent to give it to someone else?
“Okay!” came the voice of Miroku behind the camera. “Smile, Moroha!”
Moroha gave a toothy grin on Naraku’s lap while the picture was snapped, and quickly hopped off, waving good-bye as she scampered back to her parents.
“It was good seeing you, Moroha!” chuckled Miroku as he chatted with Inuyasha (yes, Naraku remembered that name), and Kagome, whose name Naraku also recalled upon hearing Miroku say it.
The rest of the day passed in somewhat of a blur. There were other kids on Naraku’s lap, but he hardly took notice of them. No, what stayed in his mind was Sesshomaru’s niece, Moroha. The little wild-eyed girl, who wanted a dead raccoon to give to her father. Because to her, it was cool. Even though it was dead. And Naraku, for the first time in a long time, couldn’t help but be fascinated by what another person was actually thinking.
When the shift was finally over, and Naraku could put on regular clothes again, he drove home, where Sesshomaru was cooking dinner, although his mind was still somewhat wandering.
“Hey, Naraku,” said Sesshomaru’s monotone, uncaring voice - a feature Naraku loved most about his husband. “I was wondering when you’d get rid of the filthy brats on your lap.”
“Oh, yeah…” murmured Naraku, “I’m all done with that shit. Although I did run into… one brat in particular. Your niece, Moroha.”
Sesshomaru grumbled under his breath at the name. “What about her, Naraku?”
“Well…” mused Naraku, stroking his chin, “she came to ask Santa what she wanted for Christmas. Her answer was…the most intriguing one that I heard all day long.”
“I’m not even remotely interested in the answer to that question, although I know you’re going to tell me, anyway…”
“All the horrid children want the same thing, you know?” said Naraku. “Dolls, action figures. Video games. All the annoying and despicable items any foul small being like that would want. But Moroha…when she sat on my lap, do you know what she asked for, Sessh?”
“I do not particularly care, Naraku…”
“A dead raccoon, Sessh…” said Naraku. “The kid asked me for a dead raccoon. Not just for her, but for her father. Your half-brother.”
“A fuckin what?” stammered Sesshomaru. “You mean…she actually asked for that?”
“Yeah!” exclaimed Naraku. “She did! And looked happy as all hell about it!”
“I never expected…someone with my brother’s bloodline to ask for something so… deliciously violent…” murmured Sesshomaru, scratching his nose. “It is…rather intriguing. Are you absolutely certain that my niece wants that for Christmas?”
“Absolutely,” said Naraku, “and it wasn’t any kind of prank. No, Sessh. She wants a dead raccoon. And I’ve been thinking about it all day since then. I don’t know why. I thought I was the only one who liked dead shit, Sessh. I just know, of course, that she’s not gonna get that dead raccoon.”
“Well naturally, no…” replied Sesshomaru lazily. “Her mother is human, and of course, would not supply such an atrocity in her house. You know how humans are.”
“But…” said Naraku casually as he stretched, “there’s lots of dead raccoons in the road, Sessh. We could always…you know. Go scrape one up and dump it on their porch.”
“I will say…that would make that woman horribly unhappy…”
“It would, right?” replied Naraku with a smile, something he rarely ever did. “Just think , Sessh! A dead raccoon on your half-brother’s porch! Your niece would be happy, and your sister-in-law would be horrified!”
“I must say, it is hard not to admire the demonic instincts of the child, even though she is only a quarter demon…”
“I thought that Christmas was all about this shit that we hate , Sessh…” said Naraku, grasping his husband’s hand, “songs and lights and all this seasonal spirit nonsense. Yet never did I believe that something dead and smelly would be a part of it. But this girl …your niece , at that, has a Christmas wish for something horrible and unsightly. It makes me…want to do something about it. To make sure that this little abomination believes that if she asks Santa for a dead raccoon, somewhere, somehow, Santa will manage to make it happen.”
Sesshomaru was quiet for a while, but Naraku knew that his husband was thinking. Sesshomaru was always very careful and practical when it came to most things, and he showed even less emotion than Naraku did.
“Very well then,” Sesshomaru finally said. “I agree, Naraku. Finding the object Moroha desires for Christmas is worthy of our time. Not only will it make the child thrilled, but it will horrify the human woman. That alone is reason enough for me to partake in it.”
“We’ll have to be convincing,” said Naraku. “I actually have the costume from work with me. Bankotsu was going to have me take it to the dry cleaners once I go back to work. Perhaps I should wear it, in case the child happens to see us. It’s quite horrid looking.”
“I do like the idea of seeing you in something atrocious…” purred Sesshomaru with an evil smirk, “as long as you keep it on for later…”
“Yes, I do think I can do that, Sessh…” replied Naraku slyly. “Let me go retrieve it, and we’ll start our hunt.”
Naraku changed into the Santa outfit, while Sesshomaru wore some god-awful ugly Christmas sweater that Toga, his father, had gotten him one year. It was a pretty foul sight to see someone as regal as Sesshomaru in something like that, but for what they were going to be doing, it was absolutely perfect.
And so Naraku and Sesshomaru set out into the night, scouring the roadsides for whatever roadkill the main drag had to offer. Squirrels, birds, mice, and everything typical, but no raccoons yet. Thankfully, Sesshomaru had a keen nose, being a dog demon, and assured Naraku that somewhere out there, not far, was the object they were seeking.
Naraku knew he could trust Sesshomaru’s sense of smell, and sure enough, there on the glistening, frosty roadway, lay the body of a recently slammed raccoon. Naraku and Sesshomaru got out of the car, and got to work.
Naraku got the steel shovel, while Sesshomaru unfurled the garbage bag. Together, they were able to scrape the roadkill off the icy pavement, and pack it neatly into the garbage bag, striped tail and all.
Sesshomaru tied up the bag, placing it in the back of the car, and they were off again - Naraku in the Santa outfit, Sesshomaru in the ugly as all fuck sweater.
“Do you remember where your foul brother lives?” asked Naraku, squeezing Sesshomaru’s hand as he drove.
“Unfortunately, I do…” sighed Sesshomaru. “Not exactly the most elaborate neighborhood for someone carrying the bloodline of a great dog-demon, but I suppose that is irrelevant…”
Sesshomaru directed Naraku to Moroha’s house. It didn’t take more than twenty minutes to get there, although the two were careful to scope out the porch from afar before getting to work.
“I’m gonna drive by,” said Naraku, rolling down the window, “and when you can get a good shot, fling the bag. Then, we’ll watch. They’re bound to hear it.”
“Oh wait,” said Sesshomaru, grabbing an envelope off of the dashboard, “the card, Naraku. We need to make sure she sees it.”
“Tape it to the top,” said Naraku. “They’ll see it before they open the bag.”
Sesshomaru and Naraku drove past the house slowly. The Christmas lights were on, the tree glimmering in the window. It was obvious someone was home, and as long as they were careful, the driveby would go unnoticed until the item actually landed on the porch.
Naraku drove slowly, and Sesshomaru took aim. With a mighty fling, the bag landed on the porch neatly with an audible ‘thud’, and Naraku slipped the car to the side of the road far away enough to watch what happened.
At first, it seemed like nothing was going to happen. The bag sat on the porch, and no one stirred within the house. However, after a moment, the small figure on the couch stirred, followed by a taller one with silvery hair. Once they walked past the window, the front door opened - and there was Moroha, sniffing the air with a grin on her face.
“Oh!” squealed the little girl, noticing the bag. “Daddy! Look! A bag!”
“Uhh …why would someone dump a trash bag on our porch?” said Inuyasha, scratching his head, very obviously confused.
“Oh!” shrieked Moroha, grabbing the card. “Daddy, look! A card! What does it say, Daddy? What does it say?”
“Hold on, hold on!” laughed Inuyasha, eyeing the card closely. “To…Moroha…from… Santa?”
“Oh, Daddy!” squealed the girl. “Santa! It’s Santa! He came on Christmas Eve!”
“Let me… uhh …read inside it…” said Inuyasha cautiously, while Moroha was vigorously sniffing the bag. “Moroha, I hope this will bring you as much happiness as it brought me. Your friend, Santa Claus.”
“Oh, I know what it is Daddy! I know what it is!” squealed the girl at such a high pitch that Sesshomaru was twitching. “Look, Daddy! Look!”
From the torn-up bag, Moroha pulled out the dead raccoon by its ringed tail, sniffing it enthusiastically and positively beaming. Inuyasha, too, seemed just as interested, sniffing the furred body.
“It’s for you, Daddy!” giggled Moroha, shoving the raccoon into Inuyasha’s stomach. “I asked Santa for a dead raccoon so I could give it to you!”
“You…you did?” exclaimed Inuyasha, gazing at his daughter. “You wanted me to have it?”
“Oh, yes, Daddy!” smiled Moroha, hugging her father. “It’s cool, right? You can sniff it and play with it and shake it in your mouth! Do you like it, Daddy?”
“Oh, baby girl…I love it…” replied Inuyasha tenderly, hugging his daughter. “This…this is the best gift I’ve ever gotten, except for the day you were born. I love you, Moroha.”
“I love you too, Daddy…” squeaked Moroha, climbing into her father’s free arm as he held up the dead raccoon. “Can we bury it in the backyard together?”
“We sure can, baby girl. After we’re done shaking the heck out of it with our mouths.”
Naraku and Sesshomaru watched from afar. Naraku was enchanted by what he was seeing. Over the years, he had always seen Christmas as a horrible time. A time where people were happy and bought stupid shit for each other. Something without any meaning. But that night, seeing a dead thing bring such…joy…to people made Naraku…proud in some way.
Perhaps, Naraku realized, Christmas didn’t come from a store. Maybe, perhaps, Christmas was a little bit more. Maybe it was about scraping a dead raccoon off the side of the road and making a little dog-demon girl happy, because she got to share this ungodly thing with her father.
“That was…kind of a fucked up thing we did,” sighed Sesshomaru. “I love you, Naraku. This was great. I hope we can have another Christmas like this in the future. Perhaps the horrid holiday isn’t so bad after all.”
“I love you too, Sessh,” replied Naraku, “and I couldn’t agree more. I liked fulfilling the twisted wish of that niece of yours. Perhaps it is worth getting to know her more.”
“Yes, perhaps you are right. I shall consider it.”
Naraku and Sesshomaru drove away, while the image of Inuyasha, Moroha, and the dead raccoon faded from view as they went home.
Meanwhile, Kagome had stepped out onto the porch, her mouth covered, her face pale and somewhat horrified at what she was looking at.
“Look, Mommy!” beamed Moroha, proudly showing off the raccoon. “Santa Claus brought me what I wanted!”
“He really did!” laughed Inuyasha.
“How… wonderful…” stammered Kagome, looking Inuyasha straight in the eye. “If you bring that thing inside, so help me…”
“Don’t worry, Kagome…” sighed Inuyasha, “we’ll take care of it the dog-demon way.”
“Good,” groaned Kagome. “I don’t even want to know more about this. I’ll just call it a Christmas miracle that someone dumped trash on our porch.”
“But it was Santa, Mommy!” whined Moroha. “He really did bring me what I asked for!”
“I’m sure he did, baby girl,” chuckled Inuyasha. “Somewhere, out there, he found a way. And that’s what Christmas is all about. Sharing things like this with the people you love.”
“Next year, I’m gonna ask for another dead thing!” giggled Moroha.
“Oh, how great…” groaned Kagome.
“Come on,” laughed Inuyasha, “we’ll meet you inside, Kagome. Me and Moroha are gonna go have some fun with this out back.”
“Thank you, Santa!” cried Moroha into the dark. “Thank you for everything!”