Flowers from Gnarled Roots

by intothecest

Summary:

Magic has a cost. Every mage knows that... but sometimes you have to pay it anyway, even when the cost is more than you can bear. To save the city, he sacrificed the one relationship that mattered to him... his sister. She's still alive, but he has no idea where, her memories rewritten.

His only hope is that If he can find her again, maybe he can find a way to still protect her like a big brother should, even from afar. The only problem is, whatever relationship they manage to rebuild, he may see her as his sister, but she won't see him as a brother. And that could change everything.

Notes:

Long ago, when AI art generation was still a fresh novelty and the negative aspects of it weren't quite so obvious, I played around with an AI avatar generator with some incest related prompts, and got this pair of siblings secretly in love with each other.. I joked that they would be the main characters of my next original incest story. Some months later, I had a surprisingly detailed dream that was the genesis of this story, and encouraged by members of a Discord I'm in (devoted to the kinds of relationships I normally write about), decided to try actually writing it, and, in the process, make good on that earlier joke. I was always enchanted with the poetic idea that the origin of the story, about magic in the modern age, was itself kind of a collaboration between the dreams of humans and machines. However I do want to make clear that no AI was used in the writing process, or at all except for the initial image which formed the basis for what the characters looked like in my head.

Chapter 1

Magic always has a cost.

It's Magic 101, an observation that's even penetrated into the pop culture, the movies or books that just use magic as story fodder, mostly without really believing it even exists.

But as a practicing warlock, it's the guiding principle I have consider every single time I craft a spell. Sometimes the cost isn't so big. What's a little temporary pain in exchange for asserting your will on the universe? Often it's something you know you can eventually recover... a little blood, a little energy, a valuable possession... sometimes even actual, literal money. In magic and in life, most costs you pay aren't a permanent loss. What's destroyed can often be rebuilt, or replaced. They're still costs, though. Even if you can get by on credit for a while, as you sometimes can, the bill always comes due eventually. Unless you arrange things so somebody else pays for you, but that's a dick move.

Once you get the first inroad into magic, the hard decisions are all about what exactly you might have to give up and the choice of whether or not it's worth it. And sometimes even when it's a steep price, it's an easy choice, because the cost is something you'd lose either way... if not casting a spell would cost you your life, giving up your arm isn't that big a sacrifice, right?

If you think that, lucky you, you've never lost anything vital. Sometimes I wish I'd only been asked for my arm, that I didn't need that spell right then to prevent the destruction of my city, that I had time to really negotiate with the forces that provide magic.

That's the thing most people don't understand about magic. It's not 'say the magic words and the predetermined price of the spell is deducted automatically.' Magic's not the secret vending machine of the universe. Magic is finding something beyond what we think of the universe entirely, and opening a dialogue. Sort of a dialogue, anyway.

Imagine you have a pet. At first it might be afraid of you, shy, and you give it what it needs and eventually, it starts to open up. It starts to like you, you think, and you certainly like it. Maybe it doesn't follow your instructions very well, but you can offer it things and, eventually, it learns that proper behavior gets it what it wants. If you train it well, you might just have to point and it'll launch itself at your enemy with no thought to its own safety, no care about why you want that person hurt.

Sounds pretty sweet, right? Who wouldn't want magic like that?

Now imagine you're the pet in this scenario, because that's closer to the truth here. These forces, they're so far beyond us that even calling ourselves cats or dogs compared to them is being generous to us. We're probably closer to ants. Still, let's say you've managed to get noticed by one of these entities... you have no idea if it's a king or a criminal or a barista just trying to make ends meet. All you know is that if you need or want something, it might give it to you. It can produce things you consider precious out of nowhere, open barriers that seem impassible, and sometimes it might clean up the messes you make. But there's a catch. It might want you to do a trick for what it gives you. Or it might decide you needed to be hit with a newspaper to teach you not to do that again. Or that in exchange for indulging you, it deserves the right to dress you up in a ridiculous outfit and take pictures. Or, "Okay, but after this we're getting you neutered." (If big magic starts to come without an obvious cost, be worried. Very worried.) You can't always tell what the motive is, just that there's usually some cost for asking. But unlike with most pets, the being that's taken an interest in you is smart enough to understand us lowly creatures and make themselves understood, more or less, once the proper protocols are in place... and so, if you don't need something right away, there's room to negotiate, ask details about costs, even suggest alternate ways to pay (not in words, these things transcend human language, but feelings). As long as you never forget it's the master and you are the pet because if you try to dictate terms it will cage you.

I'm simplifying, obviously, narrowing both the power and attention gap. Any metaphor breaks down if you push it too far, and if I did some of the things asked of me to an actual animal, it'd be abuse. Maybe it still is. These are beings for whom fulfilling our whims, sometimes reshaping our reality entirely, may just be an afterthought. About the only thing they can't seem to do is alter the past, or resurrect the dead--and there are workarounds that get close to those. With all that power, I don't honestly believe they care about me--but then, I'm a cat person.

That's why I prefer the term warlock to refer to myself, as opposed to wizard or sorcerer others in my field use. Supposedly the word warlock originally meant "oath-breaker" but for me, it's a throwback to my D&D days, when I only played at real magic. When I discovered the truth, the relationship I was taught to cultivate seemed more like a warlock than any of the other magic-using classes. I don't pore over spellbooks or harness some natural ability... I've made a connection to a powerful, probably dangerous entity. I call them Gnarly, but not to their face. They probably don't have a face. I don't know. All I know is we're useful to each other in some way, or at least that Gnarly is willing to make pacts with me--power in exchange for cost--that we both honor.

Although now I feel like I actually am, in the oldest sense of the world, an oath-breaker. Not to the incomprehensible being I draw my power from, but to the person I once promised I'd always take care of after our parents died, and maybe also to my mentor. I'd absolutely broken some promises to her.

The problem was, if I hadn't cast that spell, I'd have broken my oath even worse. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Never wanted to be damned at all. I try to use my abilities responsibly. Others are not so diligent. And whatever forces grant them their magic--if it's a wholly different entity from Gnarly or the same great multi-headed beast playing multidimensional chess with itself--aren't inclined to stop them from excesses, so that's been my job since my mentor Liz died. It's why I was recruited in the first place, because she knew I'd carry on her duties as Warden, enforcing certain standards among our kind, protecting the innocent. Somebody has to, and there are so few of us willing and able to take up that responsibility, especially in this District. I'm kind of like Doctor Strange if he rocked a beard like Chris Evans. And carried a gun.

Warlocks--wizards, sorcerers, whatever you want to call us... to me each denotes a different mindset, and mages is what I tend to use when I'm talking generically--tend break down into what Liz called--drawing from that pet analogy, which was also hers--cat people and dog people. This has nothing to do with what kind of pets they prefer, if any, but more their mindset. Cat people think of it like an arrangement, they'll do the required rituals to get what they want, beg if they need to, may come to feel entitled to the power, but if the master suddenly died they'd try to figure out how to eat the corpse until they could find another. Dog people, they trend towards worship... these things are powerful enough that you might call them gods, and I can understand somebody who wants to believe their god's the best god, maybe working in mysterious ways sometimes, but fundamentally good, and that they've been called to serve. Both types of people can be fine if they keep things in perspective and play by certain rules, and both types can be dangerous if they don't... but dangerous in different ways.

Cat people, when they go bad, tend to be the types to push the costs of their magic on other people, and they can amass incredible power that they will use against you if you cross them. Even the ones who aren't very good mages can become everyone's problem... four years with one of those as President should testify to that. But for irrational threat-to-everybody-including-themselves types, you just can't beat dog people. Some of them, feeling grateful for the special relationship, start to want to please the master, maybe start believing they're anticipating the master's incomprehensible desires and that they need to act on them. They're they ones who become like cultists in a Lovecraft story, engaging in complicated schemes to destroy the world.

A lot of mages, cat and dog people alike, tend towards Lovecraft metaphors--for incomprehensible amoral beings, he's the first name you think of--and I'm no exception. Hell, the name I call my patron is short for Gnarly Hotep, which, despite how completely off-base it was, was how I used to pronounce Nyarlathotep when I tried running a short-lived game of Call of Cthulhu in college. Except what Lovecraft didn't consider (along with 'maybe I shouldn't be a racist') was that maybe Cthulhu never really cared about eating everybody... maybe it's just one of these entities taking a nap and it's just the worshippers who believe that it waking up and eating some people and exposing the rest to The Truth would be the best thing for everyone. And Cthulhu just chomps down because it doesn't really care about us and hey, free meal.

Cultists are why I'm especially leery of dog people who work together... one unhinged warlock can be dangerous enough, but with these types of people... sometimes their delusions feed off each other and suddenly you have a whole group that thinks that nuking a city is the equivalent of bringing master its slippers.

That's the kind of group I was tracking when I paid the biggest price of my wizardly career. Only this group was trying to bring a meteor to Earth. I try to avoid killing people... especially deluded dog people because I feel like, given enough time, some of them can be helped, or at least rendered harmless, but they reach a certain point and they've just got too much power to take the risk. Especially when they're working together... dog people groups are much more likely to actually recruit among the uninitiated. The Council would actually prefer me to invoke lethal sanctions in those cases. So, maybe I should have been more ruthless while I was investigating the early signs of induction and collective rituals, but you know, despite my concerns, some dog people groups are actually fine, working towards good things, like fighting climate change, and by the time I was sure of their true ambitions I had to race to the observatory with my gun in hand to stop an apocalypse (which would, incidentally, have mitigated global warming trends).

By the time I was surrounded with cultist bodies (some were already dead, the rest were trying to kill me first, to stop my interference), I realized I was too late. The summoning looked like it might have been successful, and I had to whip up a quick spell on the observatory's computers to confirm, and help with data analysis about how bad it would be (another thing pop culture tends to get wrong is that magic actually works very well with technology... things are actually getting more dangerous for us all). That confirmed my worst fears... a meteor was going to hit, right there, in about a minute. Some of the cultists that were already dead when I got there were sacrifices to grease the wheels, but even the ones at the top, weren't going to make it even if I hadn't come along... the poor bastards were willing to pay the cost of their big spell by leaving themselves in the blast zone.

I grabbed my amulet and bloodletting knife, turned my inner eye to Gnarly and made my will known... stop that meteor. No words were exchanged, but I had a sense of the difficulties relayed by my patron. The spell needed was vulgar, to borrow another term from my RPG days... it's easier to do magic that nobody else can tell is magic, but this meteor was already noticed. Besides that, countering a spell that was just cast is also harder... or maybe just more irritating? If all our patrons are the same being, maybe they think we are too, and from their perspective it might just be like a cat who just begged for a door to be opened and then--without going through--begged for it to be closed again. But, regardless, I pushed, indicated my willingness to pay a cost, which then, in the same way you merely become aware of backstory in a dream without ever being told, made itself known to me.

My sister, Allie.

I recoiled, instantly, ready to negotiate something else, anything else, but aware the seconds were ticking down. Can't negotiate anything when I'm dead, and in that instant of communication Gnarly showed me as many of the intricacies of what was being proposed as my mind could contain. It wasn't my sister herself who would be sacrificed, of course. Only my relationship with her. Estrangement. There's a reason a lot of magic users are loners, just like there's a reason a lot of us have scars. Blood and pain are cheap routes to power, but when you want something big enough, bad enough, Estrangement provides a special kind of pain that sometimes pleases the patron. And the worst kind of Estrangement was total Severance, erasing the relationship entirely. For some people, maybe giving up one friend, one family member, might be worth it for a big spell, but Allie... she was the last person left alive that I would have died for.

Ironically, if I just wanted to survive myself, the cost would be much easier to pay. Any number of lesser spells could have taken me to the other side of the world, or ensured the observatory itself remained improbably intact. I could probably get away whole if I just sacrificed some blood, maybe a tooth, or some of my rainy day fund.

When my mentor trained me, I vowed to use magic to protect innocent people from those who used it irresponsibly or recklessly, but for all my attempts to live up to that, I'd have taken the coward's way out and let the city die to save my own skin.

Except my sister lived there too. Given enough time, I could have used magic to get her out too. Given enough time, I could have tried to negotiate a better deal, maybe dedicate years of my life to performing whatever tricks my patron found amusing. Given enough time.

My eyes were locked on the computers I'd enchanted to track the meteor, and it showed the few seconds left ticking down. With that, I only had enough time to process my sense of how the Severance would work, verify that she would not be hurt, and then say the words that were blooming in my mind, that would extract my desired effect from the cost. But it was a big price. And it was going to hurt so much. I said the words anyway.

The meteor exploded in the atmosphere... much smaller than it had appeared on my computers. Still loud enough to make a sonic boom the whole city was talking about the next day, but ultimately not harming anything but a few windows. I'd saved the city.

And my sister was no longer my sister.

Chapter 2

When I say my sister was no longer my sister, I mean that literally, but only in a limited sense. Nothing changes the fact that Allie was born to my mother and father when I wasn't even really old enough to remember a life where she wasn't in it. I still gave her piggy back rides and went trick-or-treating with her until we were old enough that it started being weird. About a quarter of my DNA (maybe a little more) was also represented in every cell of her body. History could not be changed. The memories and records that people understand it through, though, those could. DNA could as well, at least technically, but magic tends to avoid doing that, and in this case, Gnarly had given me a certainty that my sister's genetics, that aspect of her identity, would be untouched.

Everything else? That could be rewritten. Post-meteor, Allie would remember growing up with a different family, as an only child, probably in a different city, going to different schools... had to be, since my own life and history would remain as it was save for her sudden absence. So these new schools she remembered, she'd never actually been there, but if all pictures were altered to remove her from events in my orbit and include her in phantom events elsewhere, how could anyone tell? Especially if their memories lined up with the pictures. It still never actually happened, because time can't actually be rewritten, only the present could. It was one of those loopholes.

In those last desperate seconds before I cast that spell, made the choice, Gnarly also assured me (in that vague, wordless way we have) that she would still be the same person, fundamentally. Her personality would be the same--she'd laugh at the same jokes, have the same tastes, make the same decisions in similar moral quandaries. Her life would be uprooted, violently, so that we'd never naturally interact, but she'd be replanted in similar soil. Her invented past and new life would give her the same number and quality of friends, the same skills, the same pivotal moments, like the loss of her parents--only the names changed to protect the innocent. Her name, in particular (which is another things pop culture gets wrong about magic... names are not particularly important after all) because she remembers different parents.

Down one brother, too, of course, Gnarly wasn't going to give her another one of those... but she'd probably remember other random people filling in for key events I was involved in.

Maybe to her, it was a neighbor child who read to her when he was still learning himself, who became her first choice for a playmate and would find her when he was bored, a neighbor who later came to be her regular babysitter when her parents were out. Someone who watched The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe with her a dozen times because it was her favorite at a certain age, and who sometimes played elaborate make-believe games where they went into closets and pretended to be out in a whole new world where they had to to run from a scary White Witch (a woman who was actually supervising them and actually a nice older lady who didn't deserve the role she was cast in), before getting crowned as a King and Queen of Narnia.

Maybe she had fond memories of the time an older cousin or gay friend or something got in trouble because he beat up the first guy who cheated on her, days after the relationship ended, when it finally got around to him through the high school rumor mill why they broke up, because she didn't want to tell him. And even though she might remember slapping him in the chest for 'embarrassing her' and getting suspended on her behalf, hopefully she'd also remember her following that up immediately with a hug and a softly whispered 'thank you,' and being in a better mood the rest of the week.

Maybe now she remembered, after getting into Critical Role by watching it over somebody else's shoulder, eventually wheedling a local game shop to play let her play RPGs with them, instead of me and my friends, but she still had a place in her heart for those very same characters she created, and the adventures they had over snacks and pizza, and maybe they still inspired her to try writing her first non-fanfic fantasy novel that she'd been working on in her free time for the last few years.

Maybe she'll never forget a best friend who held her at the funeral of whoever was assigned as her new parents, trying to be strong. I couldn't imagine having to go through that alone, so someone had better have been there for her, even if it was just a false memory.

When you've got godlike power and intelligence, a mere brother might be easily replaceable with spare parts. Worst of all was the thought that maybe some or all of these parts weren't actually important, that she could somehow be the same person if nobody had been with her in those times. However it shook out, Allie would not actually suffer from my absence, because she would not know the loss. Only I would.

All it took was one instant for the world to go through an elaborate, near-perfect alteration. As though somebody had pressed pause on the universe, replaced the onrushing city-killer with a much smaller meteor, and then, before pressing play again also rearranged everything in my sister's life (which for all I know is what happened... the Simulation Theory is held by a number of mages). Every one of these changes tuned just right so that they would support this new status quo where I was not in her life while also making sure her personality, ambitions and even daily life would be pretty much the same, despite the new sets of friends and altered memories. Hers and everyone else's would line up. More or less. There would be people who now suddenly believed she'd been friends with them all her life, but people's memories don't always match up as it is, so probably some individuals she remembered as a big influence on her life might, if they ever met, not remember her... but she would have the evidence on her side. The data in computers and static records would all fit with her new life story. The one thing they'd all agree on is that Allie was never my sister. Nobody else on the planet--save perhaps a few other mages who, like myself, were particularly resistant to memory magics--would know we'd ever even met. The change was that complete. All so that her life would now have no connection with me whatsoever. That's what Severance means.

It's also not lost on me that this type of magic was far more vulgar than just magically whisking the meteor away and making people forget the last few minutes. If I'd clutched my amulet and asked for work like this to be done, the cost would be more than I could pay with lifetimes of servitude. As though the effort to rewrite human memories and records into a consistent whole was an unbearable amount of work for this being, even to save a million lives... but when it's the price Gnarly requires to do a completely different favor, that work--and let's face it, that kind of fundamental violation of so many lives--becomes trivial.

This is why I'm a cat person. This is why I can't believe these things that bring us magic care about humanity, or me. If all evidence of me had simply been erased from her life, that would have been one thing. Maybe she'd have been better off. But that wouldn't have made me suffer enough, so Gnarly chose the absurdly complicated (dare I say it... gnarly?) variation. My natural resistance to memory alteration by other mages--part of the reason I have the job I do--probably wasn't the reason for it... I suspect my patron could blow past that if they wanted, could have made me forget Allie too, but what's a cost without awareness of it? This way, it would ensure I not only ached for her absence but also felt deeply guilty and, maybe more importantly, that I wouldn't easily be able to find her.

'Not easily able' is not the same as 'not able.' Magic inevitably has a cost, but sometimes you can recover what is lost. One of those pithy sayings my mentor Liz used to drill into me while I was in training. She sometimes made them rhyme as though it was a lesson I might not remember otherwise. What is destroyed can sometimes be rebuilt, so get on task or wallow in guilt. Good thing she taught biology not poetry. But in the aftermath of that spell, that dumb rhyme might have been the only thing to keep me sane.

I did wallow in guilt for a while though. My first act after casting was to sink to my knees on the observatory floor, breathing heavily, and those breaths gradually turned to sobbing which almost sounded like they came from somebody else. But I knew the sobs were mine. Even a manly warlock can cry. First selfishly, for myself, and what I'd lost, but soon also convinced that, despite the assurances I was given, that Allie was just harmed by my actions... how could she not be, with all the friends that she'd lost? Even if she were given 'equivalent replacements,' even if she didn't remember the originals, they mattered. The idea of 'it was the only option to save her life,' (and her friends lives, for that matter) only helped so much... because that just meant I'd failed by not being more on the ball. Liz would have pieced what the group was doing faster, but this region is stuck with me now, and I just about fucked it up.

Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. They say those are the five stages of loss. Too simplistic, if you ask me, especially for mages. Maybe because our lives revolve around bargaining, and we know that there's a lot we don't have to accept, even if death is one of the big exceptions. This time, I faced depression first. Then anger crept in, at Gnarly for forcing this price as opposed to something else, when I had no room to bargain, but the depression never really went away. Then, as I started to hear the sirens in the distance, and considered whether or not I should just let the police take me, Liz's silly rhyming saying went through my head. The black cloud still hung over me, and I shoved the anger to a back burner, and all that was left was just... resolve. Or what passed for it, enough to get me to climb to my feet. I may not be able to undo this seismic shift in reality and my family relationship, but I could at least find Allie again. Make sure she really was okay. If she wasn't, mitigate the damage if nothing else.

I couldn't do that if I was in jail.

My eyes scanned the observatory, trying to decide how much damage control I could do myself, weighing it against the chances of being caught on-scene. I'd shot a number of these cultists. But my gun was enchanted--to ensure it both couldn't be used against me or testify against me--any bullet that hit a person would from a ballistics standpoint mimic a bullet fired by any other gun in the immediate area, rather than mine. The weapon also couldn't be fired against a living being except by me. But if I was caught in the middle of the bloodbath, there would be questions even if my weapon exonerated me.

Mages tend to develop their own particular areas of expertise. Just like a clever cat might learn how to open a door after watching you do it a few times, sometimes we can learn to cast the same spell, use the same words and same effort of will, and get the same effect for the same cost we paid before. No new negotiation needed. And some of us have made much better deals for a particular magical effect... Liz could get invisibility going just on pain alone, practically as a cantrip, whereas for me, I need to spill some blood. So sometimes rather than cast a spell ourselves, it's better to find an expert who can do it cheap, or has an item enchanted to do it on command, and word spreads. The very mundane magic of "I know a guy."

Crime scene cover-ups, though, that's rare enough that the only guy I knew was Kenny. Liz never liked him because his go-to was to make the police think it was a gang fight, which had some racist undertones. Maybe not deliberate on Kenny's part, but still even so there's something unsavory about stymieing an investigation by converting the bodies into undocumented immigrants and leaving the real people they were as missing persons, never found. They might have lost track of reality, but they've still got people who cared about them.

Unlike me.

A fresh wave of pain hit me, and I decided I'd leave them as they were, mostly. I had time for a little cosmetic magic, replace their weapons and outfits (why do cultists so often go for the robes and hoods and ornate knives?) with something a little more conventional, and got Gnarly to tweak their phones with a coherent story of tainted love. It didn't cost me much, but then, nothing felt like it could at that point. A little blood sacrifice to evade the cops on the way out (it helps being a cat person who walks through walls), and I was away free and clear and on my way back home.

Home. Didn't feel like it, with every picture of Allie gone, every gift she'd ever given me, every trace of her stripped from every familiar spot. Instead, it felt like my apartment had just burned down and I was living out of a hotel room that happened to be in the exact same place. I numbly fed the grey beast, took a shower and then went about the business of trying to fill the void in my heart with whatever scraps I could salvage. Allie might never be my sister again, in her heart, but seeing with my own eyes she was all right would help. Maybe if I got at least one picture to keep with me, I wouldn't miss her so much. Maybe.

But to do any of that, I'd have to find her.

One of my particular niche magical talents has always been finding people. I'm not good enough at it that people generally come to me, but I'm good enough that I don't go to anyone else. Technically, I had what I needed for a tracking spell. All traces of Allie might be gone, but history hadn't actually changed, which meant the favorite bowl she'd eat goulash or mac n' cheese out of when we did a sibling hangout night was still one she'd actually used. It was mine, a spare, but she used it more than me, and that would matter from a magical perspective. I sat holding that plain white bowl for a while, but not for magical reasons.

If the bowl was there, there were other things she'd touched that wouldn't have been removed or--because I had previously given them to her and the memories were too personal to rewrite--had suddenly reappeared somewhere in my apartment, and I kept stumbling across them, starting with the bowl and it's associated spoon. I don't have a lot of cutlery either, so the spoon she preferred to eat my signature dishes with (even when I make mac n' cheese, it winds up pretty gooey) doubled as the one I used to stir sugar in my coffee in the morning, and had touched her lips more than mine. Soon after, on a bathroom trip, I looked at my guest towel, realizing Allie must have used it to dry her hair after a quick shower on her way to school when, last time she had a big paper due, she used my place as a study pad, knowing it would blot out distractions from her annoying roommate. She probably had a different annoying roommate now, and I hoped she had somewhere safe to go to escape. Then, on my bookshelf, a copy of A Game Of Thrones jumped out at me. I'd never gotten around to reading the book myself but she'd borrowed it from me, and now it had been returned in the same magical severing. It was hard not to notice that these items, put together, would probably still have enough resonance with her that I could attempt a spell to locate her.

That didn't make it a smart idea. That was one of the first practical lessons Liz taught me when I was learning magic. Maybe the second one, the first being, if you're going to bleed for magic don't cut your hand if you can avoid it. You need your hand all the time. But perhaps more important, if you cut yourself to pay for a magical effect, don't use magic to heal the cut. Or more generally, if magic costs you something, don't use magic to try and get it back. Sometimes you can negotiate for it back, but the more backed-into-a-corner you were when you agreed, the less likely that's going to happen. And since Gnarly had already ignored my overtures towards this, trying to cast magic that worked to directly undo the price I'd paid... would probably go badly. "Whether our patrons have emotions as we understand them is debatable," Liz said, after letting me try, while she was stitching up the wound that suddenly became worse. "But they seem to enforce standards, at least. Like Smokey over there." At this she nodded towards the old grey cat that was--after briefly waking for my yelp of pain--once again sleeping on her couch. "I might never train him not to jump up on counters. But he at least knows not to do it while I'm watching."

Although that was the real lesson, I think. Not, don't defy them but don't do it while they're watching. And the corollary, that they're usually only watching you when magic is actually happening. Yours or somebody else's, although getting somebody else to cast a spell like that for you sometimes works. Not often enough to be worth risking it. Getting slapped back might involve losing some of my memories of Allie as well, and I couldn't bear that.

I had to find her using mundane methods. Which was tricky when most of those tools were lost to me as well. Mutual friends would be no help, because now we'd have none. I didn't have a single picture that I might be able to show around or post on social media asking for help. I wasn't even sure of my sister's name anymore, nor any other biographical details. That first day, it seemed like finding her might be almost impossible.

But what else was I going to do? Not try? Not acceptable. And if I was afraid of the impossible I'd never have become a warlock.

Chapter 3

The impossible, in this case, took about two weeks, which was an excruciatingly long time for somebody like me who'd gotten used to being able to pay for instant fixes to any problem. The task was remarkably like trying to track down the real identity and location of an online crush that you've never met in person who suddenly ghosts on you--which, by the way, is a violation and I do not recommend in any way, but I was nineteen and I was only halfheartedly doing it for a few days before Allie pointed out how creepy it was. It's not creepy if it's family, I told myself. Still, I was uncomfortably reminded of those days, as I went through facts I knew about my sister--facts I suspected would remain unchanged even if the context had--and tried to search based on that inherently dubious information, hoping I could find someone who matched the profile and might have posted a picture or a real name or location, something I could use to investigate further.

In the end, what saved me was Gnarly's own laziness. Which probably seems strange to say about an entity that just uprooted and carefully replanted an entire life in the same instant they were saving Earth from a meteor, but it's true. Gnarly only changed the minimum about Allie that would accomplish Severance. They didn't change anything about her that would make her personality fundamentally different, and that meant she was still in college, still probably studying the exact same thing and with the same hobbies. I could start with that and spent early days scrutinizing photos from clubs she might have joined in schools that had programs that might have interested her. There's over 5000 colleges and universities in the country alone, and when you consider the whole world, I could have spent my lifetime searching, but, in the end, Gnarly didn't even move her out of the metropolitan area... with a population of over a million in the city (not to mention the surrounding area), there were still dozens of options, and the odds of randomly coming across her was tiny enough that my patron must not have cared. Or maybe Gnarly wanted me to find her, eventually, to suffer the pang of seeing her in the street one day and not being able to explain that we grew up together without looking like a crazy person, and thus remember the cost of being a whiny pet meowing about trifles like saving a city. If Gnarly let her keep her face at all. That part I wasn't 100% sure about, but if someone's still alive changing their face with magic permanently is actually pretty hard, or at least has a higher cost, which might translate to the same thing.

My first break came not from investigating schools, but rather from social media. My own Allie was fairly privacy-conscious, something I'd always been relieved of before, but now was a frustrating obstacle. For example, there were probably pictures of her out there, but they'd be incidental, from friends and associates... she usually only posted pictures of herself to her Instagram, which was locked to friends only (there are perils of being an attractive girl on the Internet). She had an AO3 account, but under a pseudonym. Even if I found her there by trolling her fandoms looking for stories in her writing style (which I did consider doing), I probably couldn't connect it to her real identity. I knew, unlike me, she tweeted under her name, and even if I didn't know that name anymore, that was an idea that I kept returning to, that maybe I could find something on Twitter that was distinctly her, unchanged by the gnarling of our relationship, and so find the name she used now and then eventually more. One thread... just like with magic, one thread you can hold on to can be all you need to reach everything else.

The thread came in the form of a retweeted meme. I was just coming off an investigation off the tip-line... something I'd been neglecting, but the reports of someone potentially breaking the Accords needed to be looked into. There's a lot that the loose, anarchistic community of mages tolerates that it probably shouldn't--intentional memory alteration, for example--but outright hollowing people out into mind-controlled slaves is one of the exceptions, not just because enslaving people like that is evil and creepy but because they make easy sacrifices for big, bad, magic. So, if somebody reports their suspicions on that, I have to look into it and report to the Council. Turns out, it was something of a false alarm... the tech-bro was just using extortion and some geasa, which is okay by them. My own personal moral sense of the things you should do with magic are a little more strict, and he was definitely getting my radar up, so I marked him for later observation as a potentially dangerous cat person who should not be allowed to practice magic. Maybe I'd just kill him. Which is a horrible thing to consider so casually, but I was in a horrible place, and I wasn't sure I had the patience for an Ozai Maneuver. All I wanted was to get back to devoting my full attention to the search for my sister.

I returned to that seemingly impossible task, but not with my full attention. Part of my brain was still working, assessing the risks of doing an Ozai. That was the term I used for a very different kind of Severance then the one I suffered. Severing somebody's connection to their patron is a task that's difficult and time-consuming, but permanent. In magical circles it's often called Excommunication, but I never liked the religious associations of that, and so privately I gave it a sillier name from a show Allie and I binged as kids. As I was considering the intricacies of doing that to dangerous-tech-bro--as opposed to just killing him--the name and the associated cartoon memories were bouncing around in my head, and all that gave me a flash of inspiration.

Maybe a month earlier, there was a meme--also from Avatar: The Last Airbender--going around Twitter. It was something about how you should get a friend who immediately joins in on your bullshit, no matter how ridiculous it was, and showed screenshots of the character Katara, without missing a beat, going all-in on lies about her being the granddaughter of an even younger boy in a bad old-man disguise, or being the wife of her brother in a fake beard calling himself Wang Fire. I retweeted that meme from Allie, because we both first watched the show together, and because it rang true... that was the kind of relationship we had. If one of us made up some implausible lie, the other would usually cover for it. She might pretend to be Mom on the phone for me to get out of some kind of conversation, or I might pretend to be her boyfriend coming to meet her if some guy was creeping around her (creeps are more dissuaded by boyfriends, who they view as having already claimed the object of their affections, than a brother who they feel they just have to wait out until he's not around). Or sometimes even just for fun, either of us would make up some lie about our upbringing, and the other would elaborate on it. That was who we were... we instantly cover for each other, no questions asked. Or we used to. That bond was gone now. And now, looking at my own timeline, so was that tweet... just one of many missing tweets that involved her, somehow.

But that particular one was just a meme, right? A meme I could have found anywhere. It just happened to be her that I retweeted it from. Why actually erase it from me, unless... maybe, Allie still remembered finding it somewhere, and retweeting, and her new account had to match that memory, but mine was expendable. A new hope began to bloom inside me, that if I could find that original tweet, then track down everyone who retweeted, maybe I could find her Twitter among the retweets.

Finding a single meme posted on social media can be annoying itself... there would be multiple variations and I'd have no way of knowing which one was the real one--maybe she'd interacted with this one, or maybe she first encountered somebody who'd just screenshotted it and posted that to get likes and retweets, for example. However, once I got a few likely candidates, I could use magic to help, as long as I wasn't explicitly searching for her. It wouldn't count as breaking the rules if I just wanted to get a list of everyone who'd retweeted any of those, and searched that list myself. Especially when it was a list of several hundred names. At least, I was counting on that.

I spent an evening methodically whittling down the list, removing anyone who was obviously male, or of a different race, or had a picture at all that didn't look like my sister. Still left a lot to go through, but one name stood out the moment I got down to it.

The name was Alyssa, but I've never known an Alyssa. My sister's name was Alicia, though, and I wasn't expecting a smoking gun exact match. Here, the names sounded close enough that it might have made changing her memories easier. Even the last name was pretty close. Novak, Kovacs. To most people they even rhyme (they don't actually, but I long ago stopped correcting people on my name).

Once you have someone's name, you can tease out more. Of course, in a world of billions, there are inevitably others with the exact same name out there, but I found only one in the city, and a reference to her as being a student of an engineering program in a local college, a report of her being a member of a team that won second place in a robotic sub tournament. I started to feel my heart again, because that tracked with my sister. I didn't remember her winning silver in a sub tournament specifically, but she was on a team for a drone obstacle course thing where her team's drone got close to a win. And she was always getting little successes like this, maybe the exact details didn't matter.

Still no picture, though. The closest I could get was a group picture of the whole team at work and there was a head which, from the back, might have been her.

Good enough for some visits to the campus. I spent a few days going there, eating lunch in the cafeteria, frequenting the coffee shops, and slowly working through engineering classes, auditing in the back, hoping to find her among the faces in the crowd. Keeping tabs on the social calendar, too, for events she might attend, and lurking on the fringes. I wasn't yet ready to start asking around after her by name, since I knew that would freak me out if I heard some stranger was asking about me, but if I kept coming up empty I'd probably start.

A public tabletop game night saved me from that. I saw a posting in the student center for it, held at a cafe just off campus, and thought it was worth a try. It was something that seemed like it'd be up her alley. In our late teen years we'd played a fair bit of D&D, and sometimes simpler games made the rotation as well. Even as we got older and my time for those kind of social events started to dry up, on our sibling nights we'd still pretty often get into some kind of quick two-player game. Usually Allie brought them... over the years she'd grown quite a collection, and even without me and our shared history that went into it, it should still have been one of her interests. Besides, the event was at a cafe, not exclusively centered around gaming, so I could get some coffee, pretend to be working on a screenplay or something just long enough just to see if she showed up, and then leave without making an impression on anybody. I tried to keep my expectations low. I was just going for some caffeine... this wasn't make or break for my theory.

I showed up early, of course, got coffee and, as I often do when I'm surveilling someone in a magical investigation, found myself a table in a corner. Unlike those times, I didn't try to throw up a perception filter to keep myself from notice, but otherwise it was similar. A lot of pretending to be staring at my phone screen while looking up at every entrance, only now I was disappointed every time it was some average college student and not my lost sister. Nobody who obviously seemed to be a candidate for the the event either, although that was just judging by the lack of them carrying a board game under an arm or wearing some kind of clever game-themed T-shirt.

With a few minutes left, I took a restroom break, and when I returned my eyes were instantly drawn to the new party who had, of course, come in while I was indisposed, and it was like a stone fell off my heart, as Dad used to say... or maybe a missing piece of it had fallen back in. There, sitting at a table was a dark-haired girl... well, two, actually, but the one that mattered to me had a face I worried I may never see again outside of dreams.

I always used to joke with Allie--the Alicia that was my sister--that she had 'resting-waif-face.' Like some people automatically look like they're angry, unapproachable... except she's usually got an expression that makes her look like some lost teenager run away from home, or some plucky orphan, out of some movie. I stopped making the joke once we actually became orphans, but even as an adult she kept that same kind of face... you know, the kind of beautiful, vulnerable girl that's likely to get taken advantage of. Maybe I was exaggerating a bit, though people did regularly underestimate her age. We both had that problem when we were younger. Part of why I grew my beard is that it makes me look, like, ten years older. Allie didn't have that luxury, so she just had to live with looking young and innocent. Not that she actually was especially innocent, of course... as her brother, I may have liked to think of her as a little more pure than average, and she certainly didn't have the same stains on her soul as I had, but I knew she was a normal college girl. That meant she'd had her share of wild times, vices, regrets, and maybe even dark secrets. Even though she was a bit of a nerd (in a good way) her significant book smarts were complemented with enough street smarts to take care of herself in most situations. Still, with her whole look--the slight natural rosiness to her cheeks on her otherwise pale face, the way her her dark hair, hung unselfconsciously, parted in the middle without obvious attempts at styling and often a stray lock hanging on each side, and her starry grey-blue eyes that made her look like a tourist in a new city even at home--tended to attract guys who either were driven to try and protect her or help her out or guys who wanted to take advantage of her. Which always worried the hell out me because those types are basically indistinguishable until you really get to know them.

That first sight of her in that cafe... I don't know if it was just the fact that I hadn't seen her in weeks or just self-delusion but that resting-waif-face felt more real somehow, like she was adrift, feeling the same loss I was, even just unconsciously. But then one of the people she was with said something, and her face lit up with a relaxed smile, and I knew she was okay. I knew that was the picture I wanted of her, too, her happy, among friends. But you can't whip out your phone and take a picture of someone you've been staring at the last few seconds, not without notice, so I found my seat again, and just kept stealing glances in her direction.

Once, she looked back, her eyes crossed mine and held there, just for a moment, and my heart stopped with hope that maybe she'd recognize me, that she shared that resistance to memory alteration, that even the power of an Outer God like Gnarly wasn't a match for our connection and that with one sight of me her rewritten memories were reverting back. She would stand up and call my name, and we'd close the distance and hug, and I'd find that rarest type of magic, the spontaneous partial refund.

It was a warm feeling, that hope, at least until her gaze moved on, completely unaware that her brother was in the same cafe. Whatever look passed between us--not even a second long--was just one of those random eye-locking moments you get. She just saw a stranger who was looking in her direction, and she looked back. I looked away too, back to my phone, counted off seconds to be safe to look back, and once again she was talking animatedly with her friend. Once in a while her eyes crossed my way, in passing, but I tried to make sure I only looked at her casually, in a wide sweep of the room. I did ready my camera app, and when they were lost in a conversation that amused her, snapped a few covert pictures, including one of her smiling and even looking a little in my direction. Not deliberately, but as she moved to look away from something her friend said, I captured a frame where it looked like her smile might be for me. Mission accomplished. A picture was all I wanted, I lied to myself. A picture and to see her with my own eyes one more time, to know she was okay. Beyond that, I could do a little more... I was already planning to set up a secret scholarship fund for her, so she wouldn't have to worry about money as she continued her education as far as her beautiful brain could take her. Of course look out for her in other ways, from afar. But I knew, deep down, I should leave it at that... maybe find ways to see her across a crowded room, like this, once in a rare while, but not try to be part of her life.

It was depressing, and staring down into my half-drained coffee, I just sat with that feeling, knowing both that I wanted more and that it wasn't a good idea. A feeling that would become uncomfortably familiar but that I thought was the beginning of closure, of accepting what I'd lost--what cost I'd paid to keep her alive. Closure's a lie, when a loss you've suffered, or worse, a price you've paid is so big it's like a rip in your soul, but we all lie to ourselves sometimes, right?

There was the squeal of chairs moving, reshuffling, and I glanced over, seeing Alyssa--not Alicia, I had to remember--standing up, her friends making room for her, and I assumed she was going to head for the restroom, so I focused my attention on my phone, no longer in camera mode but looking through text messages until she passed me.

Except she didn't pass me. I noticed her legs--I mean the tight grey colored jeans that were all I could see of her right then, stopped in front of my table, and it was a good thing I hadn't gone for a coffee refill recently... I probably flinched worse than I ever have on the job, even that time I was watching a dangerous mage and got made. And Alyssa didn't appear from a blank wall behind me to try and cast a whammy spell on me. She'd just stopped in front of my table and said, "Hi."

My cup shook from my movement but didn't spill, and I tried my best to look calm, even put on a smile, which was genuine, and met her eyes. They seemed to shine brighter than the ones on her t-shirt, some sort of nebula image captured from Hubble that I'd clocked as one she'd had in her old life too. My heart was pounding like mad, once again hoping beyond hope that she'd remembered me, even partially. I couldn't exactly call her by name, even though I knew it, because if I was wrong, she'd immediately wonder how I knew. So, racing through possibilities, I came back with the stellarly eloquent, "Um, hi."

She was smiling at me, too, but it was guarded, polite... I enjoyed it anyway, in the moments before she spoke. "Are you here for the club?" Her voice was also exactly the same... just a little breathy, a shade deeper than most people would expect from her face, maybe some would even call it sultry, although to me, just... familiar, comforting. Whatever new history she remembered, it hadn't changed that or given her an unexpected accent.

"Sorry?" The word spilled out of me. She didn't know I was also apologizing for not being better, working harder, and so having to upend her entire life just to save it.

"The Tabletop Game Club." She looked back at the table she just came from, and I did too, noticing her friends were watching us and our interaction. "It's just, we saw you looking over at us." So I guess I wasn't as smooth as I thought. "And, I just... we just thought maybe you felt a little awkward about approaching a group and asking to join in. I mean, I know I would."

"No," I lied with the first explanation that came to mind. "It's just--I was looking through the window, to see if my study partner was going to show up."

"Oh. Sorry." It looked like my explanation had taken the wind out of her sails, somehow.

"I mean, it sounds like fun," I said quickly, to try and save her from any embarrassment. Her eyes did drop as I said it, and though I assumed the natural rosiness of her cheeks wasn't actually a blush, I didn't want what might be my last interaction with her to seem like I was dismissive of her interests. "What game are you playing?"

Her mood recovered, somewhere, as a halfhearted smile appeared again on her face. "We haven't decided yet, wanted to see how many people showed, what the interest is." Then the smile faded again, lips turning almost pouty in its absence. "Doesn't seem like there's many, though. Probably should have picked a better night for it, what with that big campus party."

"Right," I said. I had absolutely no idea what party she was referring to, but willing to play along. "I bet that's why my partner ghosted me, too."

"Oh," she said again, and then, "I'll leave you alone then." She turned away... and then wheeled back. "Unless... I mean, you're welcome to come play with us anyway. Games are better than four than with three, and if your partner does show up then..." She left the sentence hanging.

I came there just to see that she was okay, to get a picture I could keep with me. I'd done all that. For many reasons, I couldn't exactly tell her the truth about any of what had happened, so at best it was unwise to interact with her too much, reminded every time the things I couldn't say, it'd be... well, like picking at a raw wound. And yet... how could I resist the chance to hang out with my sister one last time? To just do something fun and have a few laughs and spend time with her and really appreciate it. I probably should have said no.

Instead, I said, "You know what, sure."

Chapter 4

"Cool." She genuinely seemed pleased to see me agree, even though I was a stranger. When she was my sister, I might get the same kind of smile if I'd decided to come out and join her in going out to get a drink with her and her friends or something. My work in the magical underbelly of the world... a lot of it had to be kept secret, so from my sister's perspective I'd turned into a little bit of a hermit in my free time, and she used to consider it her duty to try and nudge me out into the world more. Siblings take care of each other, after all. Maybe more than that, and it was just an intrinsic part of her personality, to try and include people, draw out the lonely people in the world. "I'm Alyssa, by the way."

I could have made up a name, but I wanted to see her reaction to my own. "Calvin."

"Wait... my brother's name is Calvin. You... you're my brother! Oh my god!"

In my dreams, when I found her again for the first time after the spell, that's what she said. Or something like that. Instead, she just said, "Nice to meet you, Calvin. Come on, I'll introduce you to the gang."

The gang, right now, consisted of two people, a young man with short but messy hair and thick glasses, who she introduced as "Eric, with a C," and the other dark-haired girl, "And Vani, with no H." I wasn't planning to spell it with one, but then my knowledge of Probably-South-Asian names wasn't the most extensive, so maybe she was an exception to some general pattern. "This is Calvin."

"With no Hobbes," I added. The comic strip ended before I was even born, but I still see memes with the characters, so usually it's worth the joke. I didn't really notice her friends' reaction, because I slid my eyes over to Alyssa... my sister would usually smile indulgently when I made that joke. This time, I couldn't tell, no feigned eyeroll, although the smile was there, and it may have just been politeness... though she at least seemed to get it.

Eric leaned back. "Welcome." To Allie, he said, "Okay, I'll have to give it to you, you were right." He looked back to me, explained, "I didn't peg you as someone come to join the fabled Tabletop Game Club of lore. Alyssa saw you were trying to figure out if you could somehow join us."

"He wasn't, actually. I talked him into joining us anyway." She puffed up with pride, maybe just pretend pride, since all she'd really done was ask me and I said yes. Then, she added in a stage whisper. "I think he might be taking pity on us, actually."

"The club's actually much bigger than this," Vani said.

"Yeah, I know," I said as I pulled up a chair, sitting beside Allie. "That big party." I still had no idea any of the details on that.

"Not just that. A lot of our regulars are also pretty into video games, and there's also a LAN event going on that's drawn away some of our more esportsy regulars."

Eric nodded slowly. "Probably because somebody said they should, 'pick a side.'"

"That was when I thought they'd pick our side." Vani grinned, showing teeth, and then said, "Anyway, we try to do these outreach things once in a while, drum up new blood, but sometimes it ends up being just being a few of us playing cards and complaining about stuff. We'll try to keep that to a minimum."

"If you need to vent, don't hold out on my account," I said. Especially Allie, if there was any problem she had that I could somehow solve, I owed that to her. "As long as there's a game attached. What exactly did you have in mind?"

Eric made space and lifted a heavy bag into his lap. "I always bring a few options. We like to play light, short games on nights like this, keep things newcomer friendly." We settled on a game called Sushi Go! which involved passing cards around, each time choosing one that helps you score points or hurts one of your opponents, since many of the highest points require getting multiple specific cards that can be snagged before they get back to you. It was a simple enough game, and you could easily talk while playing it, and we did, after a quick explanation of the rules.

"So, Calvin," Allie started, on our second round. "I've seen your face around campus a bit." I tilted my head, felt my eyebrow raising in an unspoken question, and not at her. Had she? In the past week, enough to notice me, without my spotting her? Possible, I suppose, but seemed doubtful. Maybe she was just being polite... but it could have been an echo of memory left over that just made her think she'd seen me before. It seemed like a thin hope, but I was grasping at any hope. "But I don't think we're in any classes together."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure we're not." The absolute truth, since I wasn't in any classes, but she looked down, like maybe I'd embarrassed her by shutting down her attempt at conversation, so, as I set down which card I wanted and passed the rest, I continued, trying to think of an explanation, a reason I'd be there that probably wouldn't intersect with her. "I'm kind of going for a pre-med track." It was a lie that was somewhat close to the truth. I'm actually post-pre-med. As in ex-pre-med... I dropped out to pursue a career in a different kind of magic, telling myself I might go back to it when things calmed down... before my mentor was murdered and I became the one who had to keep the other mages from their worst impulses. But 'pre-med' was a story I could convincingly impersonate, for a few hours.

"Nice," Eric said. "My parents wanted me to be a doctor. I mean, I feel like that goes without saying with Chinese immigrant parents."

Vani let out an amused exhalation of breath, slapping down a card of her own. "They've got nothing on Indian parents. You'd think I murdered somebody when I flunked AP Bio. But I just couldn't remember all the stupid names of like organelles."

"I actually broke my leg and my dad said it was a good opportunity to see professionals at work, that I should treat it like an internship."

"And we've reached the venting portion of the game," Allie joked in my direction, but I thought her smile was a little strained, maybe the thought of people complaining about their parents, when hers--both her actual ones and whatever substitutes Gnarly provided in her memory--were dead. I could understand that feel, but I couldn't exactly share that understanding except with a hopefully sympathetic look when I caught her eye.

"I'm not venting, I'm just explaining why my parents would like Calvin here more than me. I'm just lowly Computer Science major. Practically a disappointment."

"I'm also Comp-Sci," Vani said. "But no longer a disappointment. As long as I eventually create the next Wordle or something."

I smiled, looking towards Allie as she passed her cards towards me, our fingers grazing momentarily. "And you?"

"Engineering."

Confirmation of the expected, but it came as a relief that I tried to cover as I looked at my cards. "Impressive. So, like, building bridges and things?" I knew it wasn't her focus, or at least didn't used to be.

"That is Engineering, but I'm really more on the mechanical side, working with robots, drones, that kind of thing. It's always been an interest of mine, how things work. I'll probably wind up, like, repairing industrial robots or something, but the dream's one day to work for NASA."

It's funny, the things that change. Or didn't. When she was Alicia, my sister used to take things apart to see how they worked, and likewise build things herself. That inclination had clearly been preserved. But while I knew she'd had always had an interest in NASA as a spectator, when it came to her potential future she'd more often talked about her career prospects in terms of all the manufacturing robots in the world and how there was always need for people who understood them. Was she just using the NASA dream to impress a stranger in casual conversation, after he revealed he was studying to be a doctor? Or was this something that for some reason she'd been too self-conscious to share with her own brother, but could talk about to friends, or potential friends? And, for all Gnarly had convinced me she'd remain the same, maybe this was all symptomatic of an actual change that the spell I cast caused. I wasn't sure how to deal with these possibilities, except to mumble, "I guess that explains the 'Pillars of Creation' T-shirt."

She pulled at her top, as though looking at it for the first time. "Good eye." But she seemed to flash me an approving smile for recognizing it. "Yeah, I guess it does. But hey, I'm not all Hubble Images and robot building. My nerdery also encompasses a wide range of fantasy." I always liked that she never seemed to hide those interests that, in bad movies, often got girls teased or bullied or ostracized. Sometimes she seemed self-deprecating about it, but it always felt like play-acting rather than actual shame. And that had never seemed to happen to her very much, as though, by being so proud of it, she robbed people of any power to use it against her. "I'm the kind of girl who's all NASA in the streets, Narnia in the sheets." And then she flashed one of those fake gang-signs and an exaggerated pout, like she was posing for a picture.

Vani burst out laughing, almost a spit take, except she'd just swallowed a sip. "Lyssa! Oh my God, I can't believe you said that."

"What?"

"That does not come off like you think it does!"

"How do you know what I intended?" Then she slid her eyes my way and I got another smile, this one softer, just a little upturn of the lips and a glint in her eye, that I thought was like bringing me in on the joke, like she was just scandalizing her friend. It only lasted for a moment, before she looked back to Eric, who was holding up the flow of the game trying to choose between the cards available. "You going to take a turn or just stare at those cards all night? Come on, Eric, carpe diem."

He rolled his eyes, took a card, passed the rest, and we moved on to other topics of conversation. I tried to be boring, get the conversation back on them, get the most out of this little taste of Allie and her life now, although my attempts at deflection were deflected right back. "Don't try to distract me with talking about me," she said once, after I tried to bring the topic of the competition she won instead of what made me want to go into medicine, which was a bit of a thorny subject given our no-longer-shared-but-possibly-congruent official histories. "I know you're only after my dumplings."

That round, she'd been pursuing the strategy of collecting dumpling cards, which weren't worth much on her own but the more you collected, the more valuable they got. And indeed, I could slow her roll by taking one of those cards myself just to prevent her cards, but I wanted her to make the most of her dumplings, and just smirked and said, "Maybe later," and selected a tempura card, although Vani took the dumpling card she needed.

Aside from having to be cagey with what I said and keeping my story straight, it was fun. For the last year or so that I've been involved in it, too many of my social connections involved people in the magic scene, and it was refreshing to hang out with people without worrying about what kind of deals they were making with otherworldly gods, and just play some simpler games. And lose, sometimes. I didn't have to, I could have used the coins in my pockets to tweak probability, make people miss which cards they needed, and so win every round if I wanted to--or, just as easily made sure Allie did--and I'm not going to lie, somewhere deep down that urge was there, but I resisted it and just enjoyed the games and the company. We tried a few different pick-up-and-go card games and Vani wound up winning most of them before we switched from cards to... more cards, sort of, but in this case, we'd agreed to go for a longer game, that might take up to an hour, rather than one that would end in a few minutes. This one actually was more of a board game, with pieces and everything, only the board made up of card-like tiles, and the first that was familiar to me. It was a co-op game called Forbidden Island, one I'd sometimes played alone with Allie, where we all worked together to get what we need and get out before the island sank.

Realistically it was probably only because I'd stuck around through the first couple short games without losing interest or being obnoxious that they were willing to invest the time for a more elaborate game. And, in return, they passed my own tests as well... the people my sister now had around her at least seemed like a reasonably good group of people. I'd met some of her friends, as Alicia, and if Gnarly was rigid about his promise of providing the same number and quality of friends, I could almost guess at who these were supposed to fill in for. Especially if Vani and Eric were dating, that would probably make them replacements for James and Malika. Not replacements in any true sense, of course. I'd cost Allie those old relationships, and that she now had other, similar ones didn't ever make it okay, but I could in some sense see how Gnarly might have chosen them. Different people, dramatically different looks, but a similar... energy, I guess? Maybe from Gnarly's perspective, that's all people were, just an assortment of different types of people that could be shuffled like the cards we were playing.

As for Allie herself, despite whatever changes were wrought on her, she seemed just like my sister... except, maybe, some of the sides of her I rarely got to see. A little more quick with a racy joke, a little more competitive in games, a little... bolder, maybe? Even when I'd been with her around her friends, she seemed to be a bit more of a wallflower, but I'd assumed that was because her brother being around cramped her style. There were differences, but not ones that I immediately associated with the magic, though. We all wear different faces among different groups, I think, show different sides of ourselves to our friends, our employers, and our family. With people you've just met there's always more of a deliberate effort to show off certain facets, and with other groups you relax because there's nothing to prove. There are people in the magical community who think I'm a grim enforcer of rules they resent being held to, others who think I'm a kid way over his head, and some who think I'm a good guy to grab a beer with. Of course, none of them knew me like Allie did, who I thought of as my 'true' self, but the truth was they all were parts of my true self. Here, too, this wasn't quite the Allie I knew, but I could see the Allie I knew in there, emerging in the right company.

That company might never be me, again. But there were moments that made me think we could have a relationship like that again.

Once, when we were discussing our strategy to get out of the dicey situation the cards had put us in on the Island, and what I might be able to do to fix it, I'd said, without thinking, "No, it's Allie's turn." She had claimed the Engineer role in the game to match her major in real life.

"Alyssa," Vani corrected me, and I liked that about her, that she was the kind of friend who knew what annoyed her friends. Back before the meteor, I was the only one to really call Allie, Allie. Well, and our parents, although even they mostly used her full name as she got older. And though in our teen years she'd sometimes roll her eyes around her friends when I called her by that name, I asked her privately once if she wanted me to stop and she told me no, she liked being able to know when someone called her name if it was someone that was really important.

I guess I'd lost that right... except I hadn't, because she said, "It's okay. He can call me Allie," and then looked at me and said, "As long as you don't mind if I call you Cal."

I, by comparison, never had a problem with people calling me Cal--I actually generally prefer it, although not enough to ever make an issue of it--but the fact that she didn't seem to mind me calling her by the affectionate short form of her name seemed incredibly encouraging. Maybe it was like muscle memory, or just an ordinary echo, the kind that sometimes persists with memory magic. Even through all the changes to her memory, there persisted some feeling of rightness when I used the name, that made it acceptable to her. Vani, she narrowed her eyes with what I thought for a moment was annoyance at her friend granting that familiarity so easily, but was probably just strategy, because she tapped one of the tiles and said, "I think you need to get things under control, we can't risk getting any wetter here." The game's mechanic was that the tiles were constantly flooding and having to be shored up or risk being lost completely, and in that particular spot a lost tile would cost us several escape routes, so she proposed a plan to use Alyssa's turn, as the Engineer, to shore up that whole area, which would sacrifice our long term goal for a few turns to make sure we had a path. It didn't work. It was a good plan, one that had the potential to work, but a bad card draw from the event deck put in a lose condition anyway two turns later.

"And so we are trapped on Forbidden Island," Eric said.

Allie shook her head sadly. "Looks like we'll have to have Forbidden Orgies with the mermaids, now." She'd been cracking jokes about what exactly made the island Forbidden (as opposed to merely dangerous) throughout the game, something the old Allie'd never done when we played alone at my place. "Want to try again, or switch things up?"

The teenager who'd been mostly behind the counter the whole time we'd played, although at that moment she was wiping down a nearby table, cleared her throat to get attention and said, "I'm off-shift in ten minutes by the way."

"Right." Everyone else started cleaning up the pieces, like that had settled things, and eventually Eric must have caught my questioning look and said, "Lou's up next and, well, you've probably seen him, he's kind of an ass, doesn't like us playing here."

"And," Vani continued, "normally we don't, if you join the Tabletop Club we've got our own place on-campus. But it's kind of out of the way... here we get the occasional walk-in, like you." Her eyes slid to Allie a moment and then back to me. "You should think about joining, if you're not too busy. More people, more variety."

I'd already used the workload of studying as an excuse, knowing I couldn't commit to coming here regularly, no matter how much I wanted to. "I'll think about it," I said. "I really had fun playing with you guys." But only one of them was causing a pang in my heart.

Eric gave me a polite smile as he finished stowing the games we'd played back in his bag with practiced efficiency, somehow making it so that various boxes didn't jostle and bang together. "Yeah, it was nice to meet you."

I started getting my own things together, as it seemed like everyone wanted to be out of there before the dreaded Lou arrived. Or, perhaps, just so the money Allie raced to put in the tip jar didn't go to him. I decided to kick in a few bucks too, mostly to give me time to figure out how to say a special goodbye to my sister, who'd only just met me, without making it weird, saw the group standing by the table, talking in lowered voices. Evaluating my behavior, maybe, but whatever criteria it was, I must have passed, because Allie said, "Hey, Cal. Usually after the games we grab a drink or two at the Attic. You want to come along?"

I'd told myself that this would just be last hangout with Allie... over the past few hours, I'd started to wonder if maybe I could extend that to some sort of distant, once-in-a-while association, but I'd still been preparing for this to be the last word. She was alive, she was okay, and for many reasons it was probably not a good idea to be around her, I should just take this opportunity to say goodbye. But that was a goodbye I still wasn't prepared to give... I'd just lost her a few weeks ago. What was a few more hours, right?

Chapter 5

Not actually being a student, I wasn't at all familiar with the Attic. But since it seemed to be one of those places that students knew, I faked it, walking along with the group, which actually started in the wrong direction because we were taking a quick stop by Eric's car to drop off his bag. Allie and I hung back a few feet, outside the mini parking lot while he did, though Vani was with him, continuing a conversation that I didn't much care about and instantly stopped following the moment my sister, more-or-less alone with me for the first time since we met that night, said to me in a low voice, "All right, fess up."

"Sorry?"

"I mean, those are noob-friendly games, but you took to the rules way too quickly for that to be your first visit to Forbidden Island."

"I never said I hadn't played it before," I pointed out. "A couple of the card games were new though."

"Right. And I could tell you got a lot of my obscure nerd references." They didn't seem that obscure to me. But then, we'd grown up with a lot of the same media, sharing books, watching television together. "I bet you even play D&D."

"No," I said, but only for a second before I added, "I mean, not for a few years..." First college, then real magic, had made it hard to keep up with a group to pretend to be a spellcaster.

Her eyes crinkled happily and she almost bounced. "I knew it! You're like, too perfect a geek to have just wandered in there by chance. Admit it! You really were there to join us all along, weren't you?"

"I swear, I didn't come to play board games." I came for you. I couldn't say that thought, but my careful wording made it not a lie, and I was trying to limit my lies to her, now that it was too late to matter. "But I'm glad I did."

"Uh-huh." Like she doubted my answer, or maybe sensed the deeper deception behind it. "Don't worry, Cal, I'll keep your secret." I was about to protest that I had no secrets, but I was saved from that unthinking lie by the return of her friends, and we made our way to the bar.

The Attic turned out to be a misleading name, since is was closer to a basement, located under what looked like a home decor shop specializing in various light fixtures. That store was already closed for the evening, dark and silent, but bypassing it in favor of an almost invisible sign lead to a set of stairs which untold number of college students must have followed in an attempt to get lit up in a more fun way. Tonight, the place wasn't busy enough that we had trouble finding a table, but there were a fair number of people also enjoying the dubious ambience. Not that it was particularly bad, just not polished. Ironically, could have used some more fancy lighting, but that was probably deliberate. It was the kind of dive bar that resembled the sort of hole-in-the-wall places mages sometimes hang out--except not actually one of those or the Tabletop Club would never have found it--serving cheap beers and low-effort food. A chalkboard listed the meals and the pay-at-service policy, probably because they got sick of college students trying to skip out of their tab, but they did have table service as it was technically a restaurant rather than a bar, as I found out when we sat down to order.

"Anyone feel like splitting a plate of nachos supreme or something?" Allie asked.

Eric raised an eyebrow. "Here?"

"Hey, I need something in me, or I'm going to get all sloppy."

Vani shook her head. "Should have bought a muffin or something before we left."

"Is the food notoriously bad here, or something?" I asked. "I've never actually eaten here."

Eric shrugged. "I mean, it's the kind of place that only has food so it can technically qualify as a restaurant, so people under the drinking age are allowed to be here." Which made sense, being a bar close to a campus. When I did go to college, I knew a place like that, although they actually did make pretty good poppers and a decent burger. "I guess it probably won't poison you?"

"Come on," Allie pleaded. "Carpe diem!" Eric shook his head, and she turned her eyes to me. "Cal? Come on, you gotta try it once, just for the experience."

I relented, knowing my sister's love of cheesy things, and agreed, just to see the satisfied smile. Only to have her immediately betray me when it came to the order. She asked for a nachos platter, then we began to ask for our drinks. Vani had a Pepsi, Eric and Allie ordered beers, and I did the same.

"Might want to check this guy's ID," Allie teased when I made my order. "I have a feeling that Chris-Evans-beard is hiding a baby face."

I thought I saw a trace of annoyance on the server's face, and then she said, "You know I have to check when somebody brings it up." But I had no problem showing ID... I was above legal drinking age. Allie, on the other hand, was not. Which wasn't a big deal. Our parents believed that a little alcohol during the teen years--under supervision--gives kids a healthier respect for it, and both of us drank occasionally in each others presence before. But it seemed a little rich trying to get me in trouble for it when she had more to lose (unless Gnarly had changed her official birthdate), and I wondered what caused the sudden sandbag.

Except the server only asked me. Vani wasn't drinking alcohol, and apparently the server knew the others already... Eric was potentially over 21, and Allie must have already passed muster with whatever fake ID she'd used on previous visits. Any of my fake IDs would probably have worked, but I'd preloaded my wallet with my real one, pulled it out of the little slot and passed it to our server. A quick check confirmed I had as much right to order a drink as anyone there. More than some. "He's good."

"No way." I caught a flash of my sister's hand darting out, but didn't have time to reach as she snatched the license and looked at it. "Huh, older than I thought." But her eyes must have caught on something else. "Kovacs," she read, although she pronounced it correctly, more like Kovatch.

That got Eric's attention. He leaned over to take a look. "Wow, like Altered Carbon? I loved that series. Even ran a game based on it onc... hold up... this has got to be fake." He raised his eyes to me disbelieving. "Your middle name's Zoltan? What, are you a wizard or something? What kind of name is that?"

"It's a fairly common Hungarian name."

At this, Allie's eyes widened. "You're Hungarian?" she asked. Only she said it actually in Hungarian.

I responded in kind. "Yes, I'm Hungarian," and then in English, "At least partly." Neither of us would have described ourselves as fluent in the language... we were born and raised in the US, but we knew some of the basics--and a lot of the curse words--from our immigrant father. It was gratifying to confirm that Allie, now that she was Alyssa, still had that experience.

"Huh, I thought I already knew most of the Hungarians on campus." Then she grinned. "And then I draft somebody into Tabletop Club meeting and, boom, there's another one."

Yeah. Weird, that. I shrugged. "I just started, haven't really socialized much."

"I don't know," Eric joked. He had my ID now, had taken it from Allie while she was distracted and was showing it to Vani. "I still think he might be a wizard. I mean, Zoltan? And nobody looks that good in an ID picture."

I couldn't resist. "Well, I never said I wasn't a wizard." Deadpanning a joke is easy. Pretending you're deadpanning and still getting across a little amusement to convince people the absolutely true thing you're saying isn't actually true... is a little harder. "Although I prefer the term warlock."

That got a laugh, from Vani. "Uh oh, you just marked yourself out as an edgelord."

Allie sounded vaguely offended. "Hey, I love warlocks."

"You just love saying 'Eldritch Blast.' And all your warlock characters do wind up being edgelords." Allie smirked, shrugged, conceding Vani's point. At this point, the server arrived with our drinks, and we each took a moment to pay and tip.

Before I put my wallet away, I said, "May I have my ID back now?"

"I don't know," Eric said. "Maybe you should use your warlock magic to get it back."

"Eric," Allie warned, just the name, but with it carried an implicit, 'Don't be a dick.'

"You want to see magic? Give it back, and I'll show you some magic." Intrigued, he slid it across the table, and I picked it up, and my wallet, made a show of looking at the wallet but not actually putting it in. I was already regretting my words, but I'd gone this far, so I put the wallet on the table in front of me, lay the ID on top, and put my left hand over both. With my right, I clutched at the front of my shirt... or more accurately, the amulet hidden underneath it, but it might have just looked like showmanship, faking drawing some dark force out of my heart. When I removed my hand, the ID was gone. I flipped the wallet open, and with a thumb revealed it back inside its slot.

It's the kind of simple little trick mages use to identify each other, at least as a first step. Nothing that can't be passed off as stage magic. An expert in that who saw a trick like that might make a guess at which of several common techniques I used. Another practitioner of the real magical arts might ask something like, "What'd that cost you?" An ordinary person, they'd look impressed.

These were ordinary people. I got a "Wow," and a "Nice," from Allie's friends, but at first just a nod of appreciation from my sister, although after a second she said, "Nice trick," and her natural curiosity went a little further. "How'd you manage it? Backup copy? Hidden slot?"

I wiggled my fingers in the air. "I told, you, magic." And it was, even though I then pocketed it immediately as though ashamed, afraid she might inspect it and prove herself right. I certainly had backup IDs, and there actually was a hidden pocket in my wallet... but not in the way she thought, no way to easily slide a card in from the outside. To do that, I just used a little familiar cantrip, that made whichever of my pre-prepared IDs I needed appear in my wallet's front slot. The others are usually stored inside, the actual hidden pocket, but... outside is close enough, as long as it's covered from view while it's happening. Clutching my heart wasn't misdirection to hide a quick move... the edges of my amulet are sharp and by digging in, it generates just enough pain to fuel that kind of spell, without even rousing Gnarly directly. Boring magic, really. But I was doing it in front of my sister, which made it special in a different way. Showing off for her like I never could before. It was a rush, and felt wrong at the same time, like I was getting away with something I shouldn't be. I couldn't dwell on it, though, so I covered. "What, you don't believe in magic?" I teased. "Fantasy nerd like you?"

To my surprise, she didn't tease back. She got serious, the smile fading, that lost, wistful expression coming over her, and even my vast experience with her resting waif face it tugged at my heart when she calmly said, "Not really. Not as an actual force or anything, wizards casting flashy spells... I mean I wish it existed like that, but unfortunately, wishes don't always come true." I'd never gotten around to telling Allie about my secret life as a warlock. A part of me had always wanted to, demonstrate to her that magic was real, maybe even show her how to make her own, but I couldn't... at first, because of a gaes that prevented me, and then, after Liz died and I'd had to drop out of college, it just never seemed like the right call. I could have made her wish come true--still could--but deep down I felt that it would do more harm than good, because the magic she wanted was much darker than she'd envisioned, and could only hurt her. Still, hearing that she didn't believe in it all broke my heart a little. I'd always assumed that she, if anyone, would have kept faith about it, but here she was denying it as a possibility. At least somewhat, because she continued, "There's magic enough in the ordinary. Like... you know that saying that we're all stardust? That's the kind of magic I believe in, the wonder the universe throws us all the time that we take for granted. The beautiful billion-to-one coincidences that happen every day when the world's got billions living in it. Lovely flowers growing from gnarled roots. Words that can change someone's world. That's magic. Whatever you did... that's just sleight-of-hand." The smile started to creep back in. "Cool sleight-of-hand, though. Going to have to watch out for you, with those nimble fingers."

Flitting through my mind was the unfair implication I assumed she was making, that I might cheat at future tabletop games--or worse, steal--but I was too focused on something else to be bothered. "Flowers from gnarled roots," I repeated. That phrase rang a bell. Lovely flowers from gnarled roots. It wasn't just pulled out of the air. I remembered that she'd used that exact image in the fantasy novel she was writing. I hadn't read all of it... there was stuff in there she wasn't ready to have seen by any eyes other than her own, but every once in a while--nervously, like she was baring her soul--she'd show me bits and ask for my opinion, and one of them had contained that line. Even when I first read it, it stuck with me. In the context of the story, it was about a character learning how to connect to the big magic by focusing on the smaller magics that everybody had access to, love, kindness, and the beauty in the world that could spring even from ugliness. Only now, the image stuck in my head in a different way, because our own roots had been gnarled out of recognition... but maybe somehow our relationship could still bloom flowers. In the Attic, I almost had hope for that, for a few minutes. "That's a beautiful turn of phrase," I said, to cover my introspection, and maybe, to subtly encourage her writing talent like I'd always tried to before. Maybe I still could, just be that supportive friend in her life that she occasionally played games with.

"Yeah, well." She craned her neck away, still not able to take a compliment. "Wonder where our nachos are."

Not far, as it turned out, but that successfully turned the conversation away from her having to accept the compliment, with Eric speculating on how long it would take to tear open a bag of store-brand tortilla chips, lay some slices of process cheese product on it, and microwave it all to melty. His humor seemed to have more of a cynical bite to it than James, the friend he might have replaced in Allie's old life, but it still seemed relatively good-natured. In this case it was also unfair. The nachos, when they showed up, may not have worthy of an Instagram post or anything, but they had real melted cheese and what looked like actual green onions, jalapeno, and tomato. The jalapenos might have been out of a jar, but the other stuff seemed potentially fresh, and I didn't feel bad about paying my share.

Or more, as it turned out. Allie was digging for her money again, and I waved her off and said, "I've got it," I said. "It's the least I can do, for your kind invitation." And for uprooting your life, for not telling you who I am, for still thinking that disappearing from your life after tonight might be the right thing to do. Paying for your half of a plate of nachos ought to cover it, right?

She accepted the offering gracefully, at least, even without knowing the reason for it. "Carpe diem," she said again, and pulled one clump of tortilla from the edge, dragging strands of cheese behind it, and popped it in her mouth. I picked from a spot closer to me and had a bite. It tasted like nachos should, warm, salty, crispy, melty goodness. Comforting, familiar, like your mouth was welcoming a long lost family member, and once you have one taste it just makes you want to go back for more, but I restrained myself. Allie didn't, she went all in for a few mouthfuls, and then her eyes met mine and looked embarrassed for a moment. "Sorry, I'm hungry."

"Never apologize for your appetites," I said, and to make her feel better, took a few more for myself.

Her attention went to her friends again. "You're right, I definitely should have had a muffin. These are actually pretty good, but I feel like I'm going to regret this. Or my waistline is."

I quickly washed down my mouthful with a beer. "You're fine," I said once I could speak. The comment was instinctive, the kind of automatic reply I always gave at home whenever she made some comment about needing to diet, and it was the kind of thing that a supportive gaming friend might say. Completely true, too. She worried for nothing, in my book. I always saw her as tiny... maybe that was because I was always larger than her, but it was genuinely hard to see her as somebody who had to worry about the occasional plate of nachos. Allie's frame was small enough that I used to pick her up when I gave her a hug--maybe I never would again, but I knew I still wouldn't have any trouble--yet she always had enough of a figure that, before I started avoiding them, beach trips left me frustrated at the guys leering at her. So I wasn't just trying out this supportive-casual-games-friend role, I honestly couldn't see what she was worried about. Unless she wanted to be one of those rail-thin model-wannabes you sometimes see... which probably would have made her resting waif face effect unbearable. "The human body can endure the occasional nacho and beer night. Trust me, I've studied to be a doctor."

"You know, you're right," she said, and raised her beer. "And carpe diem."

"You seem to say that a lot," I noticed. It wasn't something I'd ever particularly known my Allie to say, but maybe when she was just around her friends....

Vani proved that theory wrong, "She's been like this since the meteor. We're still waiting for it to wear off."

My head jerked up, as my sister clarified, "Bolide. If it blows up in the atmosphere, it's called a bolide." Still a meteor to me, and if something was different, something more than a new life motto... it could have just been Vani's perception, some ineffable difference between her manufactured memories and the reality of my sister being in her life. Could be nothing, but my sister went on, "And, you were like that too. We had that whole Carpe Diem party!"

"The first two or three days, maybe. Then the rush wore off after I did the math and realized that chances are we're not all going to die anytime soon and life went back to normal." She and Eric shared a look. "Made for a pretty good party though."

Allie, though, she seemed passionate on the point. "You never know, though. If it had just been a little larger, that was it, our lives would have been over." She looked in my direction, then away, as she explained, "It just really woke me up, that I need to put myself out there more. I was stuck in a rut, and it sorta felt like... I don't know, like I was always flying under people's radar. But these past few weeks? I've talked to a bunch of new people, had a ton follow me on socials, been invited to parties, study groups, even to coffee with one of my professors, and I always thought she disliked me. It's like a spell was broken." Our eyes locked again, and my blood went cold, thinking for a moment that she was realizing the same thing I was, but then, returning to a previous conversation, she went on, "I mean, not literally, of course, it's just the change in attitude, me embracing this new motto... but if you want to talk about magic I believe in? A rock hurtling through space that exploded in the sky above us--when it just as easily could have killed us--and the thing that changed most was my own way of thinking? That's the kind of everyday miracle that makes life special."

"Yeah, I guess," I said, the guilt closing in on me. "I'll be back in a moment." And I made a quick exit for the bathroom, where the thought I'd been fighting off finally took hold, and I clutched the edge of the sink, breathing heavily to keep my emotions in check.

In my inventory of items returned in the wake of the Severance, there was one I'd never thought about. My class ring... Allie wore it on a chain around her neck... or used to, as Alicia. There was no reason for that to be true anymore, for it to be treated any different than any other gift. Now it was probably hidden in some drawer somewhere, where it would inevitably have sit, forgotten, if I'd never had a sister, or if the only use it ever had was to remind me of high school friends I barely talked to anymore. When I repurposed it and gave it to Allie, I told her it was a symbol that I'd always be with her, and that was true, but there was more to it than that. The ring was enchanted, and if she was no longer wearing it, then a spell really was broken on her. Or at least, lifted.

Naturally, when I was recruited into being what was essentially a magic cop, my biggest worry was my sister. Cops sometimes faced retaliation, and thanks to the geas, I wasn't even allowed to warn her of the particular danger I might attract. Liz assured me that there were protocols in place that would protect me and those around me, but I needed more, and so she came up with this spell--on the ring--that had two effects. If Allie ever feared for her life while she wore the ring, I'd sense it. But it would also work to hide Allie. Not physically, in any sense, just... make it a little harder for people who didn't already know her to notice her, to remember her. A lot of the best magic worked on probabilities to avoid being vulgar, and the ring would make it so she was more likely to slip people's mind if she wasn't already a focus of their attention.

It was done out love... I was only thinking about shielding her from dangers the world might bring... but something done out of love doesn't magically make it okay. especially if in doing so, I also cast a shadow over her ordinary life. Maybe this charm I'd given her had been cutting her off from potential friends who simply never thought to introduce themselves, and opportunities she was due, that then passed her by in favor of someone else. It was never supposed to be able to harm her, but I'd now seen how promises like that couldn't be trusted from an entity that thinks people are interchangeable parts that can be swapped out. Maybe this new, livelier Allie was proof that this wasn't the first time she'd paid the price of magic.

I wasn't absolutely sure it really was that charm. For that matter, I wasn't even sure she ever wore it outside of when she knew she'd be seeing me, and if it wasn't around her neck, it wouldn't have helped her. Probably. The magic on it wasn't ever really my spell, so I didn't have the gut sense of how it worked I usually get. The danger-sense part, that was my contribution, but the protective hiding magic, Liz worked out that part... I wasn't skilled enough in communicating with Gnarly, then, to do that kind of thing myself. So depending on her patron, that particular aspect of the ring might even have faded in the time since my mentor's death. By that time, I was more confident in my role of Warden and how the Accord would work to protect my identity and family that I hadn't tried to renew it... or revoke it. She'd always seemed happy, and popular with her friends, and successful. Maybe she really was, before, and this new attitude of Allie's had nothing to do with my ring that she no longer wore around her neck... and still potentially my fault. It might be some natural effect of what she thought was a near-miss natural disaster, combined with other people noticing her for the first time--because she'd never actually been in their lives before--and a phantom sense of the things that were missing from her life that she wanted to recapture.

Or, it could even just be the consequence of no longer having a brother to worry about. Because I knew she did worry... I could see that in her eyes, this last year, many times. When I dropped out of school, when I had to disappear suddenly for a job, when she noticed scars I could provide no good excuse for and so only served to convince her the private detective job she thought I had was too dangerous. Some of her motivation for our sibling nights, I was sure, was simply out of pity, and to make sure I was safe, and maybe she was cutting herself off from opportunities because of it.

Either way, it seemed like my fault, and I was once again sure that I had to make this night a one-time thing. No friendship for me and Allie was in the cards... I couldn't afford to let our newly gnarled roots grow any closer together, or my life would only strangle hers. She'd bloom best alone.

Chapter 6

After just losing--then refinding--my sister, it hurt surprisingly badly to then go on to mourn the relationship I'd started letting myself hope I might redevelop with her. I might have been better off not joining their game night in the first place, rather than to have the hope bloom and be ripped away... but then, it was unrealistic to imagine getting out of this without some level of pain, disappointment. Maybe if I'd just seen her from afar and left without speaking, I'd be just as bad, only a different way. Sometimes all we can do is choose the type of pain we get and when to let it show.

Which wasn't going to be now. I may have to stay out of my sister's life from tomorrow on, but for tonight, the damage was done, there was no sense pulling out suddenly... I might as well savor my one night with her while I could, take the pain afterwards. I've always been pretty good at locking things down, so I stared at myself in the grungy mirror and ran some water over my face to gather my composure and a short time later returned to the table and my drink. Theirs were pushed to the middle of the table, apparently done, except Eric's who's still seemed about half full.

Nobody was talking. They were in the middle of one of those 'everybody checking their phones' moments, which almost made me want to as well, even though I'd just checked mine while I was centering myself. At the very least, I wouldn't have to look at my sister's eyes. She met mine, though, when I sat down again, flashed me a smile, then looked away.

Vani took a breath. "My turn, I think," she said, and stood up. Allie also rose, like it was taken for granted they'd be going together, but I felt cheated all the same, like I was being robbed of my time, even though I knew I should be limiting that. Especially so, for that reason. But what could I say? I nodded, and decided to check my phone after all, just because I didn't know Eric well enough to attempt small-talk.

He decided to attempt it anyway, after couple minutes, put his phone back in his pocket and leaned forward. "So, Kovacs." He seemed to relish saying the name, but not as much as he did the chance to steal a nacho, which, apparently, he felt free to do when it was just the two of us. Or perhaps, Allie had given him permission to dig in while I was gone. "You seeing anybody?"

That was random. Or was it? He sounded casual, but I had the sense he was legitimately wondering. "Uh... I'm straight, if that's what you're asking." I'd jumped to a conclusion, but it was the only one that made sense to me at the time. Because--maybe it's just me--I don't generally care whether a relative stranger is dating anybody, unless I'm interested in them. Or at least, it's not a burning question I'd think to ask as soon as we're alone.

I must have guessed wrong, though, because his lips curled into a wry smile. "Not what I meant, man. Don't get me wrong, if I swung that way I'm sure the manly beard and fine silk shirts would be irresistable." I looked down at myself. Never really thought about it, but I guess I was reasonably dressy, for a supposed college guy, but that was just habit... which itself was more practicality than anything else. Destroying a nice shirt while you're drawing blood for a spell sometimes means you don't need as big or as deep a cut into your body. "But I'm also straight, and taken. Sort of." His eyes drifted back towards where the bathrooms were, lowered his voice. "Vani and I kind of have a thing. I mean it's supposed to be a no-strings-attached, casual thing... that's how it started anyway, but... like we spend a lot of time together and she seems pretty ticked if I start talking to other girls." His smile went softer, a little wistful, like he was lost in a pleasant thought. "I'm sure you know how it is, sometimes feelings develop, stuff you're maybe not ready to admit out loud but still..." He trailed off. "Anyway, I don't know why I'm telling you this. I was just making conversation." He shamelessly stole another nacho from the plate I bought for Allie to enjoy. "But hey, now you know my love life, so..."

I let out a shrug. Why not be honest? "Not much to tell. Hasn't been anybody serious in a while. Between work and school, I'm kept pretty busy, so I haven't really been looking." I used to do reasonably well for myself, which surprised me because my sister always joked that I was completely oblivious when somebody was clearly interested in me. Not unfairly, either, when I was in school I'd been blindsided by people I thought I was just good friends with... until it turned out they were secretly crushing on me and trying to flirt until finally they just made an unambiguous move. That, or Allie picked up the signs and told me. Since I dropped out to study magic... it's been much harder. I'd had a few dates, or attempts at dates, but even beyond my usual problems in telling of someone was into me, there was the new problem, one I'd previously only associated with movie superheroes or superspies... I now couldn't imagine dragging anybody into my world, or letting them get close, and anybody already in that world... well, none of them had gone very far for other reasons.

"Can't live like that, man. Well, I guess some people can, if you're like Ace or Aro, but... like, otherwise, cutting yourself off from something you know you want? That's not healthy."

I don't know where he got off trying to offer me advice, but it hit home even while it was full of shit. But this was a time to conceal, not feel, so I looked casually around the room and reached for a cliche, "Well, you know what they say, you're more likely to find love when you're not looking for it."

The comment drew an annoyed scoff out of Eric. "Oh, bullshit. That works if you're the kind of guy girls notice across a room and decide to go talk to." I certainly didn't see myself as that kind of guy, but despite that, I'd still had women who figured out my obliviousness and tell me they were interested. And, in my straight male gaze, I didn't think I was any more attractive than Eric... but I also knew that sometimes what you see in the mirror doesn't match what other people see, even when no magic is involved. He went on, "For the average guy, though... we stop looking, we miss any potential signal that we might have a shot with someone standing right in front of our faces." His gaze drifted, towards the bathrooms perhaps, or maybe just wistfully remembering, before suddenly coming back to attention. "What people mean by that is really don't be desperate, don't treat everybody like a potential girlfriend and, like, be willing to be just genuine and close with people, all of which is good advice, but I'm telling you Kovacs, if that's something important to you, you've gotta be open to the possibilities, or you might just miss out. Even someone like you."

"Someone like me?"

He stole another nacho, waved it in my direction. "You know. Good looking doctors-to-be. You probably won't have trouble finding someone with the not looking for it strategy, but you might miss out on the right someone, you know?" No longer a doctor-to-be, and I considered myself only average looking, but he had some valid points. I'd been neglecting that side of my life for a while... and looking ahead at a life without my sister in it, just about the job, it all felt... lonely. Hollow.

That was a problem for another day, and I didn't want to talk about it with Eric, so I just said, "Yeah, maybe..." and took another look around. I spotted Vani, apparently already done, stopping at the bar to get another coke, which made me look around for Allie. Friends travel together, right? There's no reason to go to the restroom at the same time unless you either wanted to continue a conversation, or just for mutual support, so... I spotted her, relaxed. She was at the end of the bar nearest the restrooms, talking to another young guy. I squinted to get a better look in the dim light, and then felt the hairs stand up on the back of my neck. "Hey. Who's that guy Allie's talking with?" I asked Eric.

I thought I saw a hint of a smirk form on his face, but I'd already turned back to them, watching. They were talking, she let out a little laugh, nodded at something he said, but I couldn't hear it. All I could hear is Eric saying, "I don't know, I don't think I've ever met him. He's definitely not a boyfriend if that's what you're worried about." Not actually what I was worried about, but I was definitely relieved to hear that. "Probably just a guy in one of her classes."

Maybe, but there was a big problem with that theory. I knew that face, that close-cropped hair, that soul patch. The recollection was vague. I couldn't be 100% sure. My memory's not perfect but it is pretty damn good, and resistant to tampering, and it was telling me that I'd met this guy before, once, or at least had a good look at him, a situation that hadn't raised any alarms at the time, but now set off sirens in my head because I think I met him at Allie's old college. Before the meteor.

As though sensing my eye on her, Allie's eyes flicked in my direction, then back to this guy, then casually put a hand on his arm... but only the briefest contact, and because she'd started back to our table, it must have been meant as a friendly goodbye. Nice talking to you, I'll see you in class, that kind of thing. A casual friendly acquaintance, nothing to worry about.

Except I was worried, because that's the same context I was sure I remembered him before. An acquaintance, someone she might have occasional friendly conversations with because they went to the same school and shared some classes... someone who should have been written out of her life. Sure, Gnarly's lazy, so it was conceivable that some of her friends from before were still her friends... but I couldn't imagine any of them would be anyone I'd ever had any contact with, could use to track down my sister, or what would be the point of the Severance in the first place? Instead, they would be people I'd never talked to, distant friends that could be met in a variety of different ways, like if they were all from some online community, and whose own lives wouldn't have to be rearranged to stay in touch. Even if Gnarly had somehow missed that I recognized this guy, why be here at the local drinking hole for her new school? It was like this guy had moved along with Allie, and that meant the memories of everybody who knew him had to be reworked too, which would have been a lot more rewriting of reality.

Unless... well, there were a few options, but none of them were good. I kept watching him as Allie made her way back to our table, looking for some sign of... something. Covert use of magic, obvious malevolence, excessive interest. In my heightened state of alarm I worried the way he watched Allie--behind her back as she walked away--might have been at least one point on that list, but, if I was wrong, if I'd misidentified him, he could have just been checking out her ass when she wasn't looking.

My sister didn't seem concerned, wore a relaxed smile as she slid back into her seat. I was not relaxed in the slighest, couldn't help myself, but still tried to sound as casual as possible. "Run into another friend?"

Now she did look back where she came, and when she turned back to me there was a little glint in her eye, a smile. Could she have a crush on him, I wondered? If nothing magical was involved, maybe Gnarly just decided that preserving someone she had those kind of feelings for was worth doing a little extra rewriting, but that level of concern for human emotional connection didn't seem their style. And the way she responded suggested he wasn't really on her mind that much. "Oh, him?" She tossed a strand of her hair back. "We've shared a few classes, and he lives near me," she explained, and then added, as though she was trying to reassure me, "He's nobody."

Except that was what I was most worried about. Or, more specifically, I was worried he was a Nobody.

Estrangement can be a shortcut to gaining some magical effect way beyond the power level of normal, everyday magic, and I'd described Total Severance as the worst kind, the kind of price I'd only be willing to pay to stop a meteor and save the city--and Allie--from destruction. But there's actually a step beyond Total Severance that mages sometimes subject themselves to, willingly, either as a cost to grant some kind of specific wish their patron was disinclined to grant otherwise, or--occasionally--as an end unto itself. That's when somebody's patron causes Total Severance with everybody in their lives at once, with human society as a whole. They become what we call Nobodies. No human being remembers they ever existed, no records of them in databases. Strangers to everybody.

To do that to yourself, you have to be either extremely desperate, or have absolutely nothing left to lose. Naturally, people like this can be extremely dangerous, especially to other mages, since nobody's keeping tabs on them anymore--even those of us resistant to memory alteration can get caught up in such a clean sweep.

They're rare though, largely information passed through rumor. A lot of mages don't even believe they really exist. I know they exist. I'd seen one. Just one. The one who killed the former Warden of this region, my mentor Liz.

I never did find out why... after me and the Warden of Cascadia tracked him down and dealt with him, I had to accept that answers would no longer be possible. Liz herself didn't know why he was after her, which is part of what makes it--for all its cost--an effective tool for revenge, if a cold-blooded one. I could maybe imagine hating someone enough to burn down my whole life just to get a shot at them... but to do it all the while knowing that they'll no longer even know why they deserved it?

Assuming they did deserve it, of course. The only person who knew why Liz was targeted was the Nobody that killed her, and he's no longer around to tell anybody. It might have just been a preemptive attack before his real goal. As a Warden, Liz was required by the Accords to neutralize any Nobody she identified... or at least, any who didn't surrender themselves immediately upon completion of the spell that caused the Estrangement. Which is fine in theory, but she'd have had to detect him first, and if he wanted to take a swing at one of the big names--or was a fanatical dog person convinced he needed secrecy to make the world a better place--trying to murder a Warden could only draw attention to his existence. The other Wardens I talked to think the more likely explanation was that it was someone with an insane grudge, somebody she acted against in the past for abusing their magic--or a lover or relative of one--and now she couldn't remember him enough to see him coming until his first failed attack.

If this was a Nobody was stalking my sister, then this time, it had to be about me, right? One way or another. Nobodys also evade some of the usual protections against targeting a Warden's private life, so one might have decided to get close to her, or use her to get close to me. Maybe to pressure me not to interfere with whatever 'better world' nonsense he was plotting, or maybe just as the first stage in whatever elaborate revenge plot he'd been dreaming about. Not all revenge is about striking out the your target directly, sometimes you just want to watch them suffer. I wish I could say I couldn't imagine somebody hating me that much, but... I've certainly made enemies I know about, so it wasn't hard to believe in one I'd been forced to forget.

That would explain him still knowing Allie. When Gnarly's spell washed over the world, there'd be no need to rewrite the memories of any friends and family to keep him in her life--he had none. It would pretty much just have to put him in a new location. In some ways, the spell that ripped her out of my life could have been a blessing in disguise, because it meant the Nobody should also no longer remember me. The terms of the spell were that Allie would retain the same number and quality of friends, even if one secretly had ulterior motives... removing me from the Nobody's memories would fulfill the promise better than removing her. This guy might just be the rarest of cases, a Nobody who no longer even remembers why they sacrificed their old life.

That didn't mean my sister was safe around him though. It had been a few weeks since the meteor, and if he hadn't acted by now, it suggested that he wasn't planning on any kind of immediate harm to Allie, but he might be fumbling around with a vague knowledge of what had happened to him, or who he'd been watching but not why, and kept it up, hoping she'll lead him to his real target eventually. Another good reason to get out of her life... but only after this particular threat was dealt with.

If he was a Nobody, of course. That was just my first theory. There were other options. A demon, maybe... which actually just start from ordinary people shaped by an ordinary mage according to ancient forbidden techniques, often leaving them with resistance to certain types of magics. Part of the cost of those transformations are dramatic weaknesses, like sunlight or certain metals, or obvious tells, like a putrid scent or cold aura. Things that would make it difficult to participate in normal society, but maybe I just hadn't watched him for long enough to notice one of these. Or, he could just be an ordinary, run-of-the-mill mage who's mind was tough enough to resist Gnarly's wipe, and got curious enough about the sudden disappearance of a girl he had his eye on to track Allie down just like I did... only his patron would let him use magic to do it. A guy like that could beat me to the punch by several weeks, although the idea of another mage that interested in my sister was itself a source of concern.

I could even just be mistaken in the most mundane of ways... a superficial similarity to a half-remembered face seen months ago and my own subconscious desires conspiring to give me an excuse to stick around. Because I knew then, despite my earlier resolution, now I'd have to stick around, until I discovered what was going on. If he was a Nobody, or a demon, I might have to kill him, but I'm not dark enough to just murder somebody on suspicion. I had to be sure... but I'd have to investigate carefully, without tipping this guy off to my presence, my capabilities.

And I had to keep an eye on Allie in the meantime.

"Earth to Cal," I heard, something my Allie used to say sometimes when I was lost in thought.

I snapped my attention back, trying to mentally reel back the conversation... but I had no idea what they'd been saying. "Sorry. Just, uh, thinking about a paper I've got due in a few days." Actually, I'd been biting the inside of my cheek and using a simple cantrip to tune the reflections in my beer so that they'd, against all laws of probability, show me the spot at the bar where the potential Nobody sat. But the angle had to be exact, and I lost it when I moved my head.

With a little bit of a sigh, Vani piped up, "Yeah, I really should be back home debugging, not leaving it until the last minute again."

"If a second set of eyes would help..." Eric's eyebrows waggled behind his glasses a little too much to think that it was just computer code he was interested in getting his eyes on. "You know I'm always available."

"Maybe..." she said, drawing the word out. Allie and I met each other's eyes, like we both knew what was happening and were amused, and then, like we were in sync, both reached for nachos at the same time. Vani sighed and got more serious, "But I think I need to take a solid crack at it myself, first." He deflated, at least until she added, "Of course, you're right down the hall, so... I'll know where to find you."

"Yeah, convenient that," Allie said, deadpan. "Someone being just down the hall when you need someone late at night... for--you know--bug squashing."

That oblique reminder that their innuendo wasn't entirely going under the radar seemed to get Vani a little flustered, but she recovered quickly, joked, "Better be careful who you tease. Remember, I know things about you too that you might not want talked about openly."

"I don't know what you're talking about. I was being completely sincere. I'm just saying, you've got somebody to help you out, so clearly it's still to early to be thinking about assignments. This is supposed to be a night off from that."

"Yeah, but I have to work tomorrow, and then it's due on Monday, so..."

"So what do you have left to do? Just debugging? That's nothing."

"Well, debugging on one section, but it's modular and I still have to do some work on the interface." Or something along those lines, anyway. I pretended to listen, waiting until they were deep in a conversation among themselves and it didn't look like I was going to be asked anything, and then tried to shift back into position where I could see the Nobody in my glass. Except I didn't. I turned around, got my actual eyes on the spot at the bar he was sitting at, seeing if he'd just moved slightly, but I couldn't spot him anywhere.

He was gone. Like magic. But possibly not actually like magic. There was another entrance to the Attic, for accessibility reasons, and he could have used that as an exit. Or he could be taking a piss or something, but the bartender was there, wiping the place where he kept his drink, so it looked like he was gone completely, that somehow he'd slipped past me. But I was worried that maybe he'd even sensed the magic eye on him, bolted. He might have even passed right through the wall like I've done sometimes. The scrying trick's usually pretty hard to pick up, even by paranoid mages, since it's not targetted on a person but rather a particular position, but everybody's got their own tricks, made slightly different deals with their patrons, and if I had been made, I might have just fucked up--again. The last thing I'd wanted was to tip him off to another magic-user in the area when that might be the one missing piece he was watching Allie and waiting for.

Or maybe he just had his own studies to get to and left while my attention was elsewhere. Just like how the magical world often worked--to keep from being discovered by the rest of the world--there were usually alternate, mundane explanations for everything.

"But yeah," Vani was saying, "I probably should think about heading back soonish. You can come hang out for a while, though, if you don't want to go home yet."

"Why don't you want to go home?" Was she feeling unsafe there? Her instincts telling her someone in her building was watching, that she shouldn't be alone?

"No reason," she said, which only inflamed these worries.

At least until Vani explained, "She angered the roommate-assigning gods."

Right, so Gnarly had preserved that relationship too. Different roommate, but probably the same kind of annoyances that led to her often staying over at my place when she really needed to concentrate. And like just like my sister always did, Allie downplayed it. "She's not a bad roommate," she said, "I mean, we get along well mostly, and she'd never late on rent... it's just on some nights it can be very hard to focus around her. And I'm pretty sure tonight's going to be one of those nights."

"Of course it is," Vani said, with a bit of a sigh, "Anyway, invitation's open if you do need to get some work done."

"Nah," she said. "I wouldn't want to get in the way of your bug-stomping." Eric seemed a little relieved that that. "I was planning on going to the library anyway, I can just hang out there until the coast is clear."

A public location like a library might normally be a good choice for that, but if you've got a stalker that potentially just gives them a place to watch you with an innocent excuse of their own. And if your stalker knows magic, including the ability to tweak people's memories, it's not necessarily a safe place. At least, not alone. "You want a little company for a while?" I asked, hopefully not too eagerly. "Since my study session was a bust, I was thinking of making up for it with some library time anyway, and... at least for me, having someone around can help pass the time." And I'd watch her back. I'd feel much better if I was inviting her to my place, somewhere I knew I could keep her safe, but we weren't there yet... probably never again. I worried even this offer was too familiar. From her perspective, we were practically strangers. And she had just complained about her roommate making it hard to focus, so my mouth just kept moving on automatic, to address that. "I mean, I'll try not to distract you too much, we can just sort of... read in the same place, and if we need a break... we've each got someone to talk to."

Still, from this one evening, it seemed like we'd built up enough a rapport from games and geeky conversation, since her face seemed to have lit up at my offer, and the smile stayed on her face even while I started rambling to sound more casual. When I'd finished, she said, "I'd like that."

Chapter 7

The weather was pleasant, and we were only just off campus, so even though Eric offered us a ride, we decided to walk to the library. Or Allie decided, I should say. I might have preferred to accept the ride, actually, or drive myself just in case the Nobody--if that was what he was--was stalking us, but it seemed like a weird thing to push when I didn't know her well. Besides, if I hadn't been made, that gave me the opportunity to spot him, or spot magic use.

Naturally, I kept a watch out on the walk, looking down every alley we passed, eyes surveying every direction on a regular basis.

No sign of anybody, but it got noticed. "I love nights like this. It's just too bad because of the light pollution you can't really see many stars." That was when she glanced at me, pointedly not trying to look at the stars, and instead glancing carefully down an alley. "Of course, that dumpster's very nice too, I suppose."

I grimaced, shrugged. "Yeah, sorry. I got jumped once." More than once, really, but at least once where I wasn't expecting it... early days of the job, me thinking I was a lot slicker at tailing somebody than I was. Luckily the mage that did it thought a memory wipe would cover all his problems with me. "These days I'm always just a little more cautious."

We stopped walking, and she put an arm on my upper arm. "Hey, I understand. But you know, well-lit street, plenty of people around, I think we'll survive taking a look at the sky." I looked up at the smattering of stars. "See, there you go. Don't worry, Cal, I'll protect you." One end of her mouth was curled up in amusement.

Since I couldn't tell her about any of what I was really worried about, I just smiled back, resumed a leisurely pace, "Oh, I'm worried about you too." Also true, but in a different way, as I tried to joke about her being a threat. "Seems pretty suspicious, wanting to walk to the library. Could easily be leading me into a trap."

"Hey, you were the one who offered to accompany me. If anything, I should be nervous about you." She paused as though considering it. "I don't need to be, do I?" Not overly suspicious, but just as though the topic reminded her that anyone could turn bad. "Because I may look small, but I can defend myself."

"I'm sure. But the last thing I'd want to do is hurt you, Allie," I said, mentally adding the at least not again, and then realized that a person who did want to hurt her would probably say exactly the same thing. "In fact, considering your friends know we left together, even notwithstanding your hidden self-defense talents, it's in my own best interests to be extra-cautious and make sure you get back to your dorm safely."

"Ooh, my own personal bodyguard?" Her face lit up for a moment in amusement, then softened as though she didn't want to make light of my earlier concerns. "But seriously, I don't think you have much to worry about. I mean, there are certain parts of campus I'd avoid after dark, or even during the day if nobody's around, but otherwise the area's pretty safe. At least before midnight or so. After that, even a main street like this might be kind of dicey, but I plan to be safely in bed by then, so... relax?"

I smiled, relaxed. Or at least, tried to fake it better.

By the time we made it to the library, there was no sign of the potential Nobody, which made relaxing a little easier. At this part of the evening, there weren't a lot of people in the building at all--honestly, I was surprised it was even open this late, but it was a campus and I guess they catered to procrastinators. We settled in to a set of tables and split up for a bit, ostensibly for another bathroom break... I assume Allie really was doing that, but me, I had two purposes.

The first was to fetch some books that plausibly fit in with my cover story of being there to study. I could have faked an ebook, but then I'd have to be extra conscious of her seeing my screen, and physical props are just better. So I pulled visited the bio section and picked up some familiar texts from my old days of actually being a student.

My second purpose of course was to do a perimeter check, looking out for Nobody, or anybody who seemed too interested in my sister, or any signs of surveillance magic. Unless you're willing to pay a heavy cost to make those kinds of spells work, there's usually some way to get a clue if you or someone you're with is a target of an Unseen Eye. Like glints of light where there shouldn't be, swivel-mounted cameras all turning in one person's directions, a nearby phone having unusual apps open that won't let it go into idle mode, eyes in pictures seeming to follow someone when they're not the kind designed like that. And, for a Warlock, more direct methods, like enchanting a mirror or shard of translucent glass and looking through for any auras is visible on a target. Most magical tracking involves sneaking some kind of enchanted item on your target and hoping they don't notice, but in the short term it's not that hard to slap an aura on a person that will last for a few hours and be invisible except to a few sensitives, or being revealed by a second spell like the ones I was preparing. There are certainly a myriad of ways to spy on someone from afar without giving your spell something to keep locking onto... but you've got to use other means to find them, and every time they move you'll need to refresh, and that, like everything, has a cost. You either leave signs, pay in pain or go mundane. I didn't notice any of the classic tells, and although, as I said, spying on locations rather than people can be both subtler and cheaper, Nobody had no reason to assume we'd be going here. Which still left mundane means, but by now I was pretty sure we weren't being physically followed, so unless someone put a stalker app on her phone, or was willing to sacrifice a lot to watch us, we were good.

Maybe even if they sacrificed. As a Warden, finding me or someone with me can be tricky, finnicky. Magic always has that qualtity... what a given mage can do is constrained by the mood and whims of their patron, but in my case spying on me is harder and more prone to failures than most people. This was because of big magic, the communal kind... only instead of using it to summon a meteor, it was put in place by the magical community to assure our law enforcement had a certain amount of safety, and our loved ones not threatened in order to convince us to look the other way about someone breaking the Accords. All mages in society, once identified, have to chip in a little sacrifice for that, to keep these wards in place. A Nobody might not be contributing to them any more, but enough always are to give me more defenses than your average mage.

It's not a perfect system. It was never intended to be. Though I like to think ACAB doesn't quite apply to us the way it does normal cops, we're still human... Wardens can go bad just like anyone else and need to be stopped. Power corrupts. Speaking of which, I'm sure that although the powerful mages who set up this system genuinely want to be protected from anyone else crossing the line, at the same time a lot of them needed to secretly consider that they might need to go against or inappropriately pressure Wardens themselves one day... so there's a lot of deliberate vagueness, loopholes, complicated clauses, but in general, certain types of mundane surveillance and even magic spells tend to be diverted around me in a way that's normally too expensive for your average mage. For example, if someone chose to scry on a Starbucks they thought I might be questioning a whistleblower at, they might find themselves subtly redirected to another, identical looking Starbucks that we weren't at. Hard to pick up on, unless you're really familiar with the area. Unfortunately, metamagic is by its nature pretty unreliable, and the other paradox is if my protection is too good, then that itself puts a big beacon on my back, letting anyone magical know that a Warden is nearby... and someone I care about might be too. So I'm not quite immune from all tracking spells, nor is anyone I'm with prevented from being observed if they're magically bugged or tracked-by-aura--and there's always been a bit of a balancing act in keeping my identity a secret--but there are ways to massage the risk. My protection really works best with keeping people from finding out accurate information on me while they know or suspect I'm a Warden already. The strongest magics kick in when I announce myself officially... stories about mages often talk about names having power, and they do, but not as much as you think... the right role can be even stronger. I was still relatively new at being a Warden, but I was starting to have trust in my ability to work through these rules, and so, after I'd done a full perimeter check and was reasonably confident that my sister and I were here alone, I felt that as soon as I verified Allie didn't have an aura I could relax, a little.

The table we commandeered was out of the way... not quite in a distant corner of the library, but close, and not in immediate sight of the door. Normally I like to be able to watch doors when I'm worried about being followed, but here that was outweighed by not wanting to risk someone being able to poke their head in the door and mark our location to set up a location-based scry... although it wasn't entirely my choice either, I followed my sister's lead once we entered the library and she wanted a quieter table to do her studying.

I was the first one back, in my hands a biochemistry book that I remembered and once understood a lot better. Almost funny how something that was once so important to me was now like a distant memory to the world I lived in now, but I knew I could probably still manage to explain what I was reading if I needed to, which made it a good thing I chose what I actually went to school for as my cover story. I could bullshit my way through law or economics or English Lit to someone who didn't know any better--sounding confident about what you're saying covers a lot--but my sister was smart and might be able to pick up on the fraud in a way an average person couldn't.

What she wouldn't be able to pick up on was my checking her aura as she returned a minute after me. At least, she wouldn't know that's what I was doing. I sat at the table, idly flipping over a mirror, like I was just fiddling absent-mindedly, not even looking at her, so it was hard to hide the action itself, although she might have thought it was my phone until she got close. If she hadn't said anything, once I'd confirmed no magical surveillance was in play, I'd have done some simple slight of hand to swap it with my phone in the pocket, but she was quick, observant, her brow furrowed a bit as she saw the silvered glass with the big spiderweb on it. "What's that?"

"It was in the stacks," I said, which wasn't a lie, because it was. I just happened to bring it there. I flipped the face towards her and, as I glanced at her perfectly normal reflection, explained, "Broken." A cheaper mirror would have just been shards, but as Liz said, dollar store sacrifices get dollar store results. So this mirror, from a local magician supply store--stage magicians, I mean, although both types of us will use the store--cost probably ten times as much and, for that money, also had a backing, which kept it mostly together. and so the cracks in it had a certain aesthetically pleasing quality.

"Somebody got seven years bad luck." Her teasing smile that bloomed along with the smile quickly faded as though realizing she was losing her cred as a rationalist who didn't give credence to anything science couldn't explain. "I mean, if you believe in that stuff." I didn't. At last, not in bad luck from breaking mirrors. A broken mirror is only something to be wary of if I didn't break it myself... because that meant somebody else might have enchanted it. Magic often lives in broken things, because there's already a cost to everything, and the smart play is to just embrace it. Sure, you could break one of your other possessions, or take on a little more blood and pain in another way, to enchant a pristine mirror, but why not be efficient about it, just turn what's broken into a source of power? "So why do you have it?"

"I don't know. Looks cool? Got kind of a kaleidoscope thing going for it." Not the best comparison, really, but it gave me a chance to look at her reflection in it again, in case a spell had been invoked in the last few seconds.

The smile returned, turning almost into a smirk. "Sounds like you're a bit of a magpie."And vanished again, as her eyes landed on a splash of red. "You're bleeding."

Of course I was. Because sacrificing physical goods wasn't always enough. In this case, it probably would have been, to use once, but because I wanted the enchantment to linger, to be able to look in the mirror multiple times, I needed a little blood sacrifice on top. Not much, just a cut along my knuckle. Always try to avoid making a blood sacrifice from your hands, because you use your hands all the time--that was one of Liz's most boringly practical yet enduring lessons--but in this case, it was small and quick and wasn't going to scar. It did hurt, but that was the point, it was magic. Still, I did my best to sound unbothered, and said, "Yeah, s'no big deal... a shard got loose and nicked me a bit. That's another reason I kept it, to spare someone else my fate."

While I was saying that, Alyssa moved up to her bag, began methodically searching within, while I tried to watch without seeming like I was watching, in case I caught a glimpse of some broken knicknack or other item that might have been used to track her. I didn't see any, but I did see a plastic box that was familiar to me, and that happened to be exactly what she was seeking. Sometimes, when my sister was checking in on me, she'd find wounds from what she thought was my 'private eye' business. Small ones, usually... a big one I'd never show her, but she saw enough bruises and small cuts to believe I was either spectacularly clumsy for a P.I., or got in a number of fights. The truth was, most of them were self-inflicted, the cost of everyday magics, but from her perspective they were worrying and--at least I believed--she started carrying this little makeshift first aid pack with because she never knew when she might need to stop some bleeding. Nothing dramatic, mostly adhesive bandages of various sizes, a little bit of gauze, and even needles and thread and a little bottle of alcohol just in case stitches were necessary. Now that she no longer remembered me, she still carried the same box... gauze and needles and all. Maybe it was never about me at all, or it had just become too engrained habit. Or maybe--I didn't dare put the hope into verbal thoughts but the feeling overtook me for a fleeting moment--she actually did have something akin to my resistance to memory alteration, and her old memories were just buried under the magic, waiting for the right trigger.

As though it was a habit in her bones, she swiftly took my hand and pulled it towards her, inspected it carefully to make sure there was no glass, then wrapped a simple adhesives around it. "Wow, you seem really prepared. Maybe you should be the doctor." I'd made a variation of the same joke after I quit pre-med and my sister caught me with a wound from magic... then, it was to distract her, now it was in the faint chance it might spark something.

"Not really my forte," she insisted. "But hey, every doctor need a good nurse. Especially if they don't take care of themselves."

I couldn't help but press once more, see if there was something deeper buried in the memory. "Any particular reason you carry an emergency first aid kit around?"

She shrugged. "I just like to be prepared. I mean, we already established that these are dangerous streets." There was a hint of teasing in her eyes as she looked up from her completed bandage, but it wilted after a moment, as though worried--considering my own wariness--she was crossing a line of taste, quickly went on with a more prosaic explanation. "Also, I work with machines, it's easy to slice a finger open on a sharp edge. And since I can't always go back to my apartment, it helps to have a backup."

Perhaps that's all it was. Maybe she just had the need all along, and--having a trouble-magnet brother--she found a dual use. Even if I was the reason she had a given habit, Gnarly might have just given her a different excuse to keep her 'self' intact. At the very least, she didn't seem to have any trouble fitting the kit into her story of herself, which meant it was unlikely to lead to a suppressed memory resurfacing, so I lost interest in pursuing it in favor of curiosity on another front. I slid my hand out from her fingers, despite wanting to maintain her friendly touch, to inspect the bandage, and, finding it acceptable, asked, "So why exactly is it you can't go back to your apartment again? What's so terrible..." She shot me a look, and I corrected myself, "Okay, not terrible, but... distracting about your roommate?"

"Yeah... I'm not sure I should tell you."

"Okay, now you've gotta tell me," I prompted. Then, worried I went too far, I backtracked again, "I mean, you don't have to if you really don't want to. But you know you're just making me more curious about it." And as a registered private detective--one with access magic, no less--I have ways of satisfying my curiosity, if I needed to.

She sighed. "It's not that big a deal, it's just that people sometimes get weird about it and I'm not sure I want to deal with that with you."

"Fair enough. But I don't think I'd get weird about it." I guess I was already weird about it, trying to come up with possibilities as I pretended to lose interest by opening the textbook, leafing through to find a section I could reasonably be there to study.

After a few seconds, she spoke into the silence I'd created, evidently deciding I was trustworthy enough. "Okay, so she's got this OnlyFans."

That wasn't anything I'd considered. I knew what OnlyFans was, of course, although the only time I'd ever used it was on the job, when a new mage reported somebody for ensnaring him with mind control magics, saying that he kept finding himself back on her page and that she was making thousands a week and yet always claimed to be broke, which in his mind proved she was sacrificing it all for spells, that sort of thing. It was bullshit, but I had to check it out, and, as I expected, the woman wasn't even a mage... he just couldn't deal with his attractions... and possibly he wanted me to locate her for him, since he was trash on tracking spells. After making sure the performer was safe from an actual mage's budding stalkery tendencies, I'd pretty much steered clear of the site entirely since. Not that I was opposed to viewing porn, or the people who produce erotic material, just when I felt a need for it I tended to browse PornHub... I could certainly see the appeal to finding a particular person to make-believe I had some kind of real connection with, but to me it would only be a pale imitation. An interesting fantasy seemed better.

I guess it made sense that Allie might be afraid I would judge her roommate, in the way that self-righteous or hypocritical people often did. I looked back to her, trying to seem like I didn't find it a big deal, even shrugging a bit. "Not sure what the big deal is. That life's not for everyone, mind you." The last words I blurted out, hurriedly, not entirely sure why I did because it did sound a little judgey. Maybe a part of me just reflexively wanted to dissuade Alyssa from contemplating the same idea. Not that I thought she would, but... still, I guess I was a little old-fashioned, and hypocritical myself, at least when family was involved. The idea of dipping back into OnlyFans and spotting my sister there... well, that didn't bear thinking about. Instead, I jumped to something else to demonstrate my better, non-judgey side. "I know someone in my bio labs who does erotic dancing." Or knew, anyway. We were friendly at the time, but not close enough that we kept in touch after I left school. "I mean, I've never gone to see her perform, but she's pretty open about it, and I get it. Tuition ain't cheap."

'Well, my roommate's got a scholarship, so...." She didn't finished the thought, but didn't have to. That's not it for her was implicit.

She might have been baiting me to see if I was bothered about someone doing it just for fun, but I wasn't. "Whatever, I'm sure she has her reasons." Then, something else occurred to me. Maybe Allie wasn't as cool with it. "But it bothers you enough that you steer clear?"

"Oh, no," she insisted. "It's not that. It's just that our walls aren't the thickest and she can be... very enthusiastic. And sometimes she isn't alone."

"Oh."

"Yeah...." She drew the word out. "Not exactly the thing I want to be hearing all night, especially if I haven't been dating in a while."

"I can see how that might be a problem." I guess that confirmed she wasn't dating anybody. While that might otherwise be a relief, as one more thing I didn't need to worry about her over, now it presented a problem of its own. Not dating anybody could provide an opportunity for the Nobody to start dating her in the near future. "And I guess I can also see how you wouldn't want to tell people, but really I didn't think there were that many prudes in a school like this."

"You'd be surprised. But often it's the opposite... I mean, sometimes guys especially just get super weird about it. Like, they hear she's an adult entertainer and suddenly that's all they want to talk about, like I'm no longer interesting, except as a tool to maybe invite them over and get an introduction and maybe a chance to be her next co-star."

She was probably exaggerating, but maybe it was her mind's explanation for that lingering sense of being overlooked that my protection spell possibly caused. "Well, I happen to think you're the more interesting one of the two of you," I assured her, just to give her confidence that others would think the same. "Consider the roommate topic dropped. My curiosity's been satisfied."

"So, now... I think to be fair, you need to satisfy my curiosity on something."

"Okay, shoot."

She made a show of thinking about it, looking into my eyes as though searching for something. I just hoped it wouldn't have to be a lie. Finally, she said, "I feel like we should have met before." Those weren't quite magic words, but they might have had magic effects if her mind was still working the problem. It's hard not to hope for something you want so much. "I mean, sure, it's a big campus, and I know I've seen that face before... but... we're both in the sciences, you're Hungarian, you're a big geek, and so it feels like our orbits should have crossed sometime before. Even if you just started here... and believe me, that's another thing I'm curious about, since you've got a couple years on me. But really what most interests me right now is why the hermit act?"

Alicia had also accused me of being a hermit from time to time... although she had more evidence than a single meeting. "I'm not exactly a hermit. But I do live off-campus, so... making the social rounds is a bit harder." I didn't want to mention a job, like I had with her friend, because then I might have to lie. Technically I am a registered private eye, but that would lead to too many follow up questions. "After a long day, just getting home can be exhausting." Especially after a long day of Warden duties. There's a whole complicated protocol that's supposed to help ensure other mages don't follow me and track back to real identity and thus my family, although if a Nobody did find my sister before Severance, it was clear they needed updating. Using the cover of checking my phone, briefly, I took a peek at the broken mirror again, but there was still no sign of any surveillance.

"Uh-oh." Allie's resting waif face hit me hard when I stopped looking at her reflection to see her real face. She genuinely looked concerned. "I'm not keeping you here, am I? If you've got a long commute ahead of you..." she trailed off, giving me space to make an exit.

I wasn't ready for that yet. "No, I'm good with staying for a little while." I shot her a smile until the concern faded, replaced by a return smile. "It is a weekend, after all. And I'm getting some study time in."

"Sure, me too." She looked down at her book. "Real quality studying happening here." We'd mostly been talking since we'd got our books.

The same deadpan sarcasm I might have expected from my sister. "Well, I am also enjoying the company," I admitted, even though I knew I was only here to make sure there was no magical threat tracking her, and once that threat was dealt with or disproven, I'd have to vanish from her life.

"Me too," she said, and then, leaning back she gave me an appraising look before finally admitting, "You know, Cal... it's weird, but I can hardly believe you and I just met tonight. It sounds crazy, but I feel like I've known you much longer."

This was the second time she'd said something like that in only a few minutes, and this time it was much closer to the truth. My mouth went dry, my heart racing as I began hoping against hope that this was the start, the first tip of the domino that would lead to her memories coming back. "Yeah? I know what you mean. It's like we're..." I left it dangling, deciding this might be my best chance. If she could cross that gap, fill in the rest of the sentence herself--with 'family,' maybe, or 'brother and sister'--then maybe she could feel the truth of that as she spoke it, and thus spot the false memories for herself. Sometimes, in memory magic, that's all that's needed to break the enchantment. Forcing it from outside doesn't often work, and even prompting them to find inconsistencies can backfire if they feel like you're leading them, but if you're gentle and can get them to express something, even as a joke, that goes against the memories forced on them, then--if it's important enough--some people recognize it as a truth that can't be denied.

"In sync," she finished instead, proving we weren't, not quite. "Just kind of a shame."

"Hm?" For a moment it almost felt as though she'd heard my earlier thoughts about the short-term nature of our association, and regretted it. Either way, I still nursed a fragile hope that, if I left enough space, she might come to some magic realization.

"That we're here doing class work." She shifted her chair a little, moving it slightly closer to me, but it seemed accidental. I took another chance to look at her in the broken mirror. "Instead of... you know, something fun."

I had no idea what she might possibly have in mind, since in my book, most of the night had been fun... or at least a reasonable approximation of it while accompanied much more intense emotions like relief at seeing her again, and worry about what dangers I'd put her in. Of course, I couldn't exactly talk about how meaningful the night had already been for me, and I didn't want to let her know about the worry, so I just gave a casual shrug and said, "I don't know, Allie... seems like it's already been a pretty good night."

"Still could be better, if we put our minds to it."

I tilted my head, sort of a half-nod, conceding that yes, that was probably true, although I struggled to come up with something we could do right now that was fun and also safe, considering my current concerns. I certainly didn't want to move us to another location where my hypothetical Nobody might pick up our trail again. In a more perfect world, maybe I could escort her to my place in ways that another mage couldn't follow and there we could hang out more games or watching movies or something, but that didn't seem to be in the cards. A library at least seemed safe.

Allie was still looking into my eyes, and I must have been thinking too long, because she shrugged, and said. "You know what? Carpe diem, right?" and before I could try and guess what was going on in my sister's head she rapidly closed the distance and put her lips on mine.

Chapter 8

Magic is powered on pain, pain and sacrifice. You don't break the laws of the universe without suffering something... the loss of an item of value, the blinding bite of a laceration on your body, even the guilt and shame that comes with abandoning the part of yourself that believed it would never cross a certain line--until you did. All of that can factor in, and you might balance which way you suffer more, but you don't get away with it for free. But obviously everybody who does a spell thinks it's worth the cost, right? So a funny thing happens sometimes with mages.. Some joke about it being the Loyalty Points Program... if the pain, sacrifice, the wrongness of what we're doing starts to become attractive in itself, and that makes the magic effectively come at a discount. Some come to crave the pain almost as much as the magic effect we're after, or at least, learn take pleasure in sudden shocks and reversal of fortune, even when no spell is being cast... just the rush of knowing your current suffering could fuel real power, could turn everything around.

As my sister kissed me in the library, not knowing I was her brother, I knew I should be disgusted, horrified, and parts of those emotions were probably there as well, but I can't deny a part of me was excited, even thinking, "What magic I could make with this." Power corrupts, they say, and that was one of the routes, not like some drug addiction but just the simple knowledge of how easy it would be to trade a little more sin for the power to make your world a better place... that makes it easier to slide deeper and deeper, willingly. If I just surrendered, let this happen, forever sacrifice any hope of restoring the previous relationship Allie and I had, I knew I could probably get more in return. Magic thrives in broken things, so let me just break myself a little more and fuel something miraculous.

It's a seductive line of thinking. Dangerous, though, to indulge. And, after a moment, I convinced myself it was also an illusion. This wasn't the stepping stone to great magic, I told myself. This was probably just the price--payment deferred--for saving the city weeks ago. All along during my search for Allie, I thought I'd been tricking Gnarly, clawing back some of my sacrifice by being clever and subtle, using low-tech means so the otherworldly entity wouldn't be aware what I was doing, but maybe I was fooling myself, and they saw, even predicted, my moves all along, watched me like a cat owner with a spray bottle, pretending not to notice I was wiggling my butt preparing to hop on the forbidden counter. Maybe, anyway. It also could have been cosmic coincidence, Alyssa being a girl who had no idea what was really in my heart, mistaking one kind of interest for another and growing bold. If that's all it was, Gnarly might still have no idea I'd reconnected with my sister, or no longer care, having thought strange aeons worth of unfathomable thoughts since they'd done that spell for me. A lowly warlock like me doesn't get to know the minds of our patrons, but still, this seemed like their style, and it seemed to make more sense as a cruel joke than my sister actually wanting to kiss me.

What magic we could make, though. The rush of perverse pleasure. Before I could remind myself that this was probably Gnarly's plan, I hesitated too long, letting the kiss happen instead of pulling away immediately. Or maybe it wasn't a sin of giving in to temptation, and I was just too stunned to react appropriately. I honestly can't be sure if my lips moved at all. Piecing the moment together after the fact is hard, I felt like my brain had just bluescreened, if a bluescreen could come with excitement and other incongruously positive emotions as well.

Life can change in a moment... my life already had, on several occasions, but what you do in the moments after one of those critical moments matters too. I was doing my best to walk back one big change, and whether this was Gnarly's plan or a potential path to great power, I knew I had to do the same here.

"Never kissed a guy with a beard like that before. Though I gotta admit I always wondered what it'd be like." No, I had to remind myself, she meant she wondered what it'd like to kiss some hypothetical person with a beard, not always wondered about the beard I'd worn for several years, because she no longer knew me. She'd kissed me as a relative stranger, one she thought she had chemistry with, not a relative. From her perspective, there was nothing strange going on, she was perhaps being a little bold and impulsive, but no taboo was being broken on her end. Certainly no magic was hoped for but the ordinary kind. Just a kiss that she seemed to be pleased by. "Not so bad, all in all. I'd say we can call that experiment successful. What do you think?"

I was still pretty gobsmacked, trying to quickly work through the implications and the best path forward--backwards, maybe, to get us back to the vibe we shared before the kiss--especially considering that I still needed to be near her, to protect her at least until I convinced myself there was no outside threat. Yet, that was also at risk. If I rejected her...

Before long, I'd lost my chance to choose the best path. Even too long a hesitation can become a kind of rejection, and I got to see a flash of something more heart-rending than her resting-waif-face... her genuinely-insecure-waif face. "What, was it not good?"

"It's just... it threw me a little... because you remind me a lot of someone." That could be a reason to show hesitation.

"An ex?"

Maybe that would be easier, to pretend that I couldn't genuinely be attracted to her because she reminded me of a painful love affair, but I still didn't want to lie to her, and the truth might be even better. "No... my sister, actually."

Her lips twitched at that, as though not sure for herself what that meant. Then she leaned in again... not close enough for another kiss, just to show engagement, comfort, maybe even pleasure at the comparison. Her eyes seemed less sad, at least, more playful. "Does that have to be a bad thing, though? I mean, judging by our chemistry tonight, you obviously get along with your sister. Personally, I never got it when girls blew off guy-friends with 'You're like a brother to me... I've never had one, but that vibe always seemed like the basis for a good relationship... the kind of person you know you can spend time with. And you'll know me and her will probably get along, if you ever introduce us." The playfulness was still there, but the way she was rambling made it seem like a cover, like she was worried this bold move she made was going to all come back and hurt her.

I was going to have to help it. "I... uh.... lost her recently." I imagined Gnarly snickering out there in whatever extradimensional void they lived in.

Her face fell, immediately, drew back. I'd severed that connection, that playful banter that yearned for more. Just like I'd wanted to. The rush of pain almost made me wonder if I'd done it magically. She began looking at the various things she'd put on the table, like she was about to gather them close to herself and run off. "Oh, I'm so sorry. Here I go, trust me to say the worst thing..."

"No, it's not your fault. I'm fine," I said automatically, and then gave a halfhearted shrug. "I mean, maybe not fine. I miss her, a lot. But..." But I couldn't talk about her. At the very least, I'd have to make up a name. "Can we change the subject, maybe?"

"Sure," she said. "In fact, maybe I should just go. I'm sure my roommate's probably done by now."

I didn't want to hurt her by shattering that ideal. But clearly she was flustered and seeking an escape, and I still wanted to be able to walk her home. I reached out for one of her hands. "Hey," I said, feeling the trembling fingers still instantly at my touch. "I do like... spending time with you." Maybe chickening out and not just saying 'I like you' was the wrong play, but I felt like I was walking a tightrope here. I didn't want to totally break her heart, but I knew that any hope I gave her would be taken away after I dealt with the potential Nobody and had to fade from her life. Still, she looked into my eyes, not scared, just seeming a little... fragile. But that was probably the waif face. "I'd like to hang out more. Just..." An inspiration hit. A cynical move, perhaps, but it might be effective. "Can we take it slow? You know, see if we work as friends first."

My sister had complained once about guys pretending to be friendly only to be interested in sex, said she wanted to build up a real connection first before moving into romance. And I don't think she was lying, exactly, but... people don't always know what they really want. Even in the magic-using world. Liz has told me some mages too far gone, the ones that had to be dealt with in the most extreme ways, have thanked her for freeing them from the changes they willingly wrought upon themselves and subsequently must have regretted deep into their soul. To a lesser extent, I've seen it myself, sometimes. That's just human nature. The brain thinks it wants one type of thing, but the heart is the one that chooses, and they don't always communicate. My sister said she wanted someone who took the time to get to know her, but, watching from outside, I couldn't help notice patterns in her life... like, how whenever she did attempt a relationship with someone she was already friends with, it never seemed to work out for very long. Something was always missing. Just as often, she seemed to wind up with guys she'd just met... and, after all, the whole reason we were where we were was because she made an aggressive introduction to someone who was basically a stranger to her... it was clear that even if she thought her ideal was a friends-gradually-turning-to-lovers situation, her heart wanted her to be swept off her feet. Carpe diem, after all.

So, it seemed, if I offered her what her brain thought she wanted most, I might keep Allie's attention, keep her wanting me to spend time with her in the near-future... but, in time, her romantic interest would fade, and we'd settle into just friends. The kind of friends who can disappear out of your life when they're not needed anymore and not hurt you very much. I tried not to think of the pain that would cause me--or the fact that the idea of her losing that improbable romantic interest also stung with loss and potential power. It was probably just guilt, I told myself, at taking advantage of my unfair knowledge. Still, didn't feel quite as potent as the pain of that kiss.

"Friends," she said, the single word dubiously as though I was offering her the cone with ice cream on top as only a maybe down the line. Then her lips formed a smile. "As long as you think you can handle that."

I was certain I could. Less certain I could afford to stay friends, not without screwing things up, but the only dangers I foresaw came from outside... it certainly wasn't like I planned to put any moves on her. Still, the situation was tough to navigate, and I felt a little lost, not sure what to say next other than my very uncertain smile, which seemed to encourage her. But she no longer was ready to rush out, so I must have given her just enough hope that she hadn't completely misread the situation and embarrassed herself... that it was not her, it was me, and she must have thought I was worth investing a little more time in. Instead of continuing the conversation and testing the uncertain ground, we settled into mutual studying for a bit... or pretending-to-study, in my case, my attention more on a shattered reflection. safer than staring at her directly, trying to assure myself she really was safe. Having seen no real sign of magic, I was starting to wonder, again, if it was all just paranoia all along.

Here and there, as we studied, we talked a little, short conversations about music or television, nothing too deep. It seemed like the interrupted--rejected--kiss had broken some spell, the easy flow of our conversation that we'd had all night was lost and getting it back was proving to be difficult to both of us. I wanted to ask her more about her history, her high school years, her family, to see how much had changed, but there never seemed like a right moment... especially since it would likely invite questions about me.

Whether it was the lingering awkwardness, or just the time, finally Allie decided to call it, arching her back against the library chair and stretching her arms behind her head, before saying, "Anyway, I don't know about you, but my brain's reached that point where I'm just staring at the words without taking anything in. Not sure pushing it any more will do much good."

"Yeah, I think I've done about as much as I can here." In my case, what I was studying was mostly the mirror, but what I said was true anyway.

She held up her phone, waved it slightly. "I got the All-Clear signal, at least."

I hadn't, yet, because there couldn't be one I could trust. All I could say is that if a Nobody was following her, he was being far too discreet for my magic to pick up. I wasn't ready to give up the idea entirely, because if I was 'made' as a fellow mage, he might have decided not to use any magic while I was on the scene. In that case, lurking around watching for magic was just making him bide his time. As much as I hated to leave Allie to potential danger, even assuming my theory about him was correct, if he hadn't made a move yet, he probably wouldn't jump to one because of the first mage he spotted around her. So I probably had time to investigate in other ways, and it would be creepy to try too hard to stay close to my sister.

Not that I wasn't going to try, as best I could, for a little while yet. "Walk you home, then?"

Her face reddened slightly, although the corner of her lip was curled up and made me think she was pleased I asked rather than worried that the embarrassment of the kiss was going to linger. Still, she said, "Oh... you don't have to."

"Hey, self-protection, remember. I don't want to be a prime suspect, if, god forbid, something happened." I kept the tone light, and I was prepared to give up here if she refused.

Except she didn't. "Okay, if you insist."

Allie didn't live too far, but once we left the library I had to be extra vigilant about being tailed again, and I didn't want her to notice, so I tried to get her on a topic that would get her distracted. So I did the extra-suave move you use when you want a girl to like you, and asked her about her Dungeons and Dragons character. When it's not your sister, it works wonders. I assume. Honestly, it's not really one of my staples. But with my sister, I knew her well enough to know it gets her talking, and, unlike about actual personal stuff, if she asks me in turn, I didn't have to make up any stories... they already were made up.

It also allowed me a little more insight into the scale of Gnarly's modifications, because when we were younger, we used to play together. Granted, she wasn't telling me about her characters from years ago, but what I mentioned of mine were drawn from some of those games, in an attempt to spark something. I didn't tempt fate and name them, though, so if she remembered a game long ago with a warlock indebted to a fire efreeti or a monk who used a boomerang, she didn't say anything... though she did look over at me with a curious interest at the boomerang thing, and asked a few questions but not in the way of somebody who is obviously chasing down a familiar thread. It was too difficult to tell without potentially poking the bear and being blatant and freaking her out by claiming a presence in a memory she'd believe down to her core that I wasn't involved in. So, like a lot of things that night, I was stuck in the grey zone of ambiguity. If my vague description of my boomerang-monk didn't trigger a memory of another game when she was in high school where her tiefling rogue was saved from being dragged into a monster's mouth by a monk's lucky Natural 20 on a boomerang on the tentacle holding her, her interest might just have been because my character had a fun-sounding homebrew. If she did remember that adventure, she might have just refrained from saying anything because she didn't want to tell me my idea wasn't as original as I might have thought. It might just be that the exact stories we make up is less important than the mere fact that we make them, or maybe the particular ones I helped her make just weren't all that memorable to begin with. At the very least, over the walk we seemed to be regaining some of the smooth chemistry we'd lost because, judging by her smilies, the sparkle in her eyes, and the way her words rapidly tumbled out as she explained some of her adventures, she seemed to enjoy the conversation.

I did too, although I had to be careful the magic of D&D didn't also distract me from the risks of actual magic. There were no obvious signs we were being tailed, but if you're good, you'll use non-obvious signs, and one person could only be so observant. Checking every passing pigeon to see if its eyes weren't being hijacked just wasn't practical. I had to keep telling myself that if a Nobody was in her life, he was here long before I found Allie again, and hadn't done anything overt or dangerous, so there was no reason for him to start now, and there wasn't even any sign of him catching on to me being a mage.

Eventually we wound up at the door to her building, and as much as I wanted to be invited inside, it wasn't in the cards. "This is me. And see, safe as sound. Good job. I'll keep you in mind if I need to hire a bodyguard." She was teasing me, obviously, but there seemed to be an undercurrent of warmth to it. "I think I can make it the rest of the way on my own. If you were just angling for an introduction to my roommate, you wasted your time."

"My time was not wasted," I said, and then we stood in awkward silence, as I tried to think of how to close it, how to frame a warning and genuine offer as a jokey request. She seemed to rock back and forth on her heels, bouncing ever-so-slightly as we looked at each other. "Well, if you see anyone suspicious and you need backup again, you've got my number." It felt cringe-worthy. Probably was, even if earned me a weak smile. "Otherwise, I guess I'll see you around campus? Or, you know, maybe we'll get together for a game night?"

The smile faded... not angrily, but like she was expecting or hoping for something and got disappointed. "Yeah. Like I said you're always welcome at the club. And shoot me a text if you want to do something one-on-one, or grab a bite or something. No pressure, just as friends." She lingered for another second as I gave some kind of vague promise that I would, and then said, "Night."

"Night." I couldn't help but watch her go, at least as far as I could watch her in through the glass window to her building's lobby. After that, I knew it was time to go home.
Well, not right away. First I needed to use my mirror while I could. Now that I didn't have to look normal in front of Allie, I could check out the area looking for random auras or signs of magic. I wouldn't even look that odd... someone stares into something they're holding in their palm these days, you assume it's a phone even if you don't actually see a lighted screen. So, while pacing back and forth and trying to look like I was busy, I looked through the cracked glass at the doors, building windows, statues, even passing birds. I saw nothing.

At least, I saw nothing that shined abnormally in the face of the mirror. My eye was caught on a shattered glass bottle, just off the path. It could easily be nothing but... it was close enough to the building that the might be a connection, so I investigated closer. Here I used my actual phone, as a mini-flashlight, and spotted a slick of dark on one of the shards. Definitely blood, not anything else. You perform blood magic enough, you become familiar enough to identify it on sight. The presence of blood on a sharp object not far from Allie's building sent my concerns back into overdrive, even though I knew it could still easily be innocuous. Maybe someone smashed the bottle, made a halfhearted effort to clean up the big pieces, cut themselves, and gave up for the maintenance staff to handle the mess. Or maybe somebody--or Nobody--watching the building needed to fuel some kind of spell. Wardens have ways to tell the difference. Any mages can, I suppose, if they think to check and know how to ask, but we Wardens are specifically trained to keep certain things in our bag of tricks and do them repeatedly for a minimum of pain debit. In this case--like some kind of CSI Brakebills--we often find it useful to be able to analyze blood to see if it's been mined for magical power, or just... you know, blood.

Unless I wanted to open up a vein or something myself, the task's easiest done at home, with previously enchanted equipment I'd already paid for. so I waited until there was no traffic around and carefully picked up a shard with a hanky, wrapped it, and put it in a pocket for later. On my way off campus, I still frequently checked my mirror, but it was time to accept that I'd reached my limit about what I could do with Allie just fumbling around in her orbit. I wanted to stay near her building, stay all night, but watching out for her like an obsessive big brother wasn't getting me anywhere right now, and it was only going to risk me standing out more, so it was time to take things further, and treat things like a Warden.

That also meant taking the safe routes home. Best practices meant that any time you dealt with the magical world, even unexpectedly, you took a safe route home, which meant abandoning my car... since I hadn't come here expecting to deal with a threat like this, I hadn't taken the precautions that would let me anonymize it, so returning that way could draw a line for anyone who gave me undue notice between me and my real base of operations. I'd let it get ticketed, and either get it tomorrow or pick it up from an impound lot in a few days, depending on how zealous the property owners were. Public transportation was safer, easier to get lost in. It also obscures the very nature of my existence for anyone unsure, because if you've got access to magical powers provided by a patron, why the fuck would you still be taking a bus? Magic's about pain, but you've gotta be a special kind of twisted to fuel a spell that way. If you're a Warden, though, there are opportunities there beyond pain, some I engage consciously, some set up in advance by the Council and known by those in power, others passed down only Warden-to-Warden. There are routes that form complicated sigils to befuddle the minds of anyone who doesn't follow them exactly, ways to quickly dip an established warp zone that another mage would have trouble finding, much less following me through. It's a little cloak-and-dagger, but a lot less entertaining than it sounds, especially when you don't actually know anyone's following you and you've done it hundreds of times. Mostly, it's just a slog, and worse, a slog that forces you to pay attention to every step.

These precautions are supposed to make sure a Warden's doesn't have to worry about being assaulted the moment he comes through the door and lets his guard down, but of course that's exactly what happened when I got home. Luckily, it was the kind of assault I should have expected, the grey beast immediately shouting its outrage at my absence, and rubbing up against my legs trying to convince me he loved me while actually attempting to make me trip and break my neck which would surely provide an even faster source of food than me making it to the kitchen and opening a can. Smokey would have acted the same way even if I was right on time, but I was legitimately late this time, so I felt bad, and I made it a priority. "I know, I know," I told him, and grabbed a plate and a can of his wet food, then said it. "But I found her, buddy. I found her." He didn't care, of course, he just wanted me to give him the magic boon of a plate of food he didn't have to hunt for. I just needed to say the words out loud. I couldn't tell anyone else, and saying it helped make it real, and I could even pretend his insistent meows were some kind of cheering. I didn't bother explaining the Nobody, or the weirdness involving her trying to kiss me... Smokey was face first in his food by that point and couldn't have given even imagined sympathy anyway. Instead, I just dug the wrapped piece of glass out of my pocket and approached the display cabinet which held my collection of figurines.

Aside from various protective wards, a lot of mages don't deal with enchanted items, because it's so easy for them to lose their powers--I have to buy a new wallet every few weeks because the old one's magic stops working with a little more wear and tear--but Wardens often have a need for specialized tools. Breaking an item is a good cheap way to get a temporary enchantment going in something, but if you want the type of tool you're going to be using again and again, a better strategy is using something that's expensive and yet doesn't really have any other use, a well-crafted piece of art that needs to be kept safe. Thus, collectibles. My mentor Liz kept plates, godawful ugly things, For me figures, although most of mine aren't magic. Some of them were things I actually liked. Those camouflaged the rest, the ones I paid far too much for, for no good reason, because it has to have a special quality of pointlessness for the money spent to count as enough of a sacrifice that it'll really hold an enchantment. I'd never seen Fullmetal Alchemist, and I suppose now I never will, lest I wind up enjoying the show, and the figurine of the big metal guy from that show lose its power as part of my own alchemical gear. I'd spent a good chunk of change on that little statue, and went through a lot of pain in imbuing with its minor enchantment--not to mention the continuing risk of potential awkwardness of having to talk about it to any visitor--and it would all go to waste if it took on any additional meaning to me beyond looking vaguely cool and being of use in my work. That would ruin the magic as surely as if Smokey got in the case and smashed it.

To everyone else, it's just a statue, but if I opened the case and touched blood to the resin surface, by looking at the eyes I could detect if there was any magic potential left in the sample (even if it was minuscule enough that the test itself would expend it), or it had already been consumed by another spell.

I took a breath, unlocked the cabinet door and prepared myself for the moment of truth, even though I knew it was no such thing. If the statue's eyes glowed briefly, it would mean that particular bit of blood was just a college student who had an accident, unconnected to the magical underbelly of the world... but it wouldn't definitively prove that there wasn't also a Nobody or any other mage in my sister's orbit. On the other hand, if the eyes remained dull, it would mean there was someone in the area other than me sacrificing blood to try and impose their will on the universe... which might not be connected to Allie at all. In the end I knew this little test proved nothing and I'd have to keep investigating either way, but... a glow would make me feel a little better, add a little evidence to the theory that I was just being paranoid tonight. No glow would make me more paranoid.

I touched the bit of blood-stained glass, seeing if the figure (I think I remember his name was Alphonse) would react. No reaction, like whatever was inside the armor was dead, or maybe enjoying a good knight's sleep. I didn't know if the character could sleep. All I knew is that night, I probably wouldn't be.

Then again, I probably wouldn't be regardless, thinking about my sister's lips pressing against mine.

Chapter 9

As loathe as I was to involve anybody else in this, because my sister was involved, it was time to break out the Batphone and make some calls. My first call was to a guy who worked for one of the Council members, a liaison named David Kline. He wasn't a mage, but he was aware of magic.There are a lot of people like that, doing it either just for the money or for the hopes of being chosen as an apprentice one day. "Warden of California here." The Council knows my name, and Kline was there when I was inducted... although his memory might have been wiped of it. Even if not, their employees are usually specially geased to not be able to reveal secrets, but discretion is a hard habit to break. I confirmed my role by touching my amulet to the phone and reading the words that appeared there. "I need access to the Rolodex." I don't know why we don't just call it the Registry, or the Index, or something, because that's what it is, a list of all the registered mages in the region. But there were protocols to these requests and maybe it was because the word itself triggered some magical access. Also according to the protocols, I named four streets that formed a box around the campus. "Anyone living or working within those borders in the past month." Technically 'month' was a lunar month. Just one of those magic things.

"One second." The voice went away completely. I've never actually seen the Rolodex in person, so I don't know for sure how it works, but at first I pictured some magical map, consulted with a crystal. Until one time Kline forgot to mute after the request and I heard typing, so I've come to believe it's a fairly ordinary database enchanted to keep this information. Maybe it's an old computer, like from 80s movies, green screens and all. When his voice returned, I got more evidence of how limited it was. "No one is known to be operating in that area." Of course not. That would be too easy. If someone was there, I could pay them a visit, ask them if they were behind the broken bottle. But even though every mage must be registered and contribute to certain big ongoing spells, there's never been an effort to track them beyond the bare minimum. Mages value their independence and ability to flout the normal rules and if the Rolodex attempted to track everyone's comings and goings--even to the degree cell phone companies already do--compliance would go way down. The Rolodex keeps the names and faces of those with access to magic, where they live and work, and any notable sighting, but it's enchanted to be hands off and accessed only when necessary, which means the Council themselves and, with restrictions, Wardens like me are the only ones who see the stats. It's not even maintained by people, just magically updated whenever public records or news reports identify a change. If a Google Alert somewhere in the world tagged a known mage as being in the area within that lunar month, whether because they were arrested or if it's one of our celebrity mages spotted by paparazzi--or if someone recorded their presence in one of their Diaries--they'd show up as a hit there too. But Diaries are optional, employment records usually only get updated with taxes, and there's not even an obligation for a mage to send a change-of-address notice if they move, as long as they're paying their dues.

It was probably still true that no mage officially lived or worked in the area of campus, but if, say, a visiting professor from a different school--who was also secretly one of us--was there delivering a lecture, it also might not show up unless a paycheck had already been cut or there was a big enough press release about it. For that matter, any mage who decided that hitting on college students every weekend was the best use of their arcane powers would be able to do it under the radar, and I'd probably only know if some other mage doing the same thing noticed them breaking rules of the Accord in the process and either put it in their diary or called the tip line rather than handling it themselves.

The Wardens of many other districts have official deputies, but we're sort of a Texas of magic... people casually walking around with deadly weapons and only minimal oversight and that's how our Council likes it... forget the ordinary people that might be in the crossfire if someone goes rogue. Sure, most mages here are primarily hunters for wealth or conventional fame, but still, I'm very aware that we've still got a lot of potentially dangerous people to watch out for, and only one of me for the whole state of California (well, district... for some reason I never quite got the details on, part of our state's deserts are in another district). One person for one of the more populated districts... plus, potentially, an apprentice, although I wasn't ready to take one of those on. And, to be fair, there are a couple dozen others, a nebulous shifting assortment of mages who at least temporarily adopt the whole 'we should be using our powers to protect people and keep other mages in check' ideal but without the official powers granted by my office, or the training--and most of them unsuitable as apprentices because they lack my resistance to memory manipulation. Still, they help, some. Honestly, it's about 80 percent them relieving my burden, 15 percent them being well-meaning but causing more trouble than not, and 5 percent becoming a real headache themselves. Mostly dog people on all counts.

A few of them might nevertheless be suitable for additional training and responsibility, but I'm still the only Warden the Council will authorize. If there was something within my official duties too big for me to handle, I was expected to call on one of our neighboring districts for help, like happened with the investigation of the Nobody that killed Liz. Don't ask me why that's preferable to just finding deputies. It's not like the salary would be a strain on the local Council's coffers.

At least I have a pretty good relationship with the nearby Wardens, even as The New Guy. Cascadia, in particular, who finished my mentorship and offered himself as a resource in case I ever needed advice or a little off-the-books help. I certainly wanted to keep this off-the-books, even if I only wanted advice. So I dialed the number he gave me.

"Cascadia here." Cascadia's a fairly unassuming guy, white, a little shorter than me, maybe a decade older, narrow face and skinnier build, at least outwardly. Always dressed in expensive tailored suits, unless he needed to destroy them to fuel a spell, And he pretty much always wore sunglasses when he was here, so that's how I picture him, although I suspect in his district the frequent rain make it into a sometimes thing.

"California," I said.

"Oh, hey Cal, good to hear from you." Cas is also one of the few Wardens, to know my real name, or at least my real first name. He was calling me Cal when we first met, so I assumed he already knew, and until I realized he was calling me short for California. Caught off guard, I slipped up, and he advised me not to tell others until I was officially invested with Warden powers and protections. The weird coincidence of my name actually wound up being woven into the protections themselves... now any mage who hears the name assumes it's just a stand-in I use in place of an actual name. I don't mean "they're all that gullible," I mean the magic forces them to believe that... mind manipulations work on existing fault lines and biases in the human mind--they've actually got psychologists developing the protective spells--and if you do it right, even people who know how magic works won't believe the truth in front of them. "Nice work running down that cult, by the way." I was a little touched he read the report--I usually don't have much time to do more than skim the reports from other districts--but his next question ruined the moment. "What'd that cost you?"

"More than I'd care to admit," I said, which was an admission in itself, I suppose, that I'd used a lot of magic, sacrificed a lot, but I didn't want him, or anyone, to know just hoe much.

"And let me guess, the Council didn't give a shit, and is still leaving you out on your own?"

I repeated the infuriating final few words of the response I got to my report. "The system worked as intended." There was a 'good job' after that, I think, but you'd think after the close call like that, they'd realize how risky it was to have just one Warden. Granted, they don't know quite how close a call it was, or what I gave up to keep one of the major cities in the district from becoming a disaster zone.

"You know how it is," Cascadia told me "They're not really affected. All of them are warded up the wazoo, so even if you screwed up, what do they care? All it means to them is a few potential rivals get flattened, and a ton of suddenly cheap real estate." I grimaced, not sure it was at his cynical take or the fact that he might be right. "But hey, I'm glad you were there. Millions of people owe you their lives. Not to mention the animals. The zoo alone..." He trailed off. "Speaking of which, how's your little monster?"

I glanced over to the grey beast who was looking at me like he knew we were talking about him. Maybe he heard Cas' voice on the phone, I don't know how good cat ears are. "Smokey's fine."

"Good. I was worried you might be living on the streets after that meteor cult." Local Councils provide some level of funding for their Wardens, knowing we might have to burn it in spells, but... it's a fixed thing, not like an expense account. That just wouldn't work, if Gnarly knew my costs would be directly reimbursed, they'd just ask for more. In this case, they did, asked for something nobody else could give me back, but it's also pretty common for a Warden to have to live homeless for a few days or weeks or even months, suffering their penance for messing with the natural order, either for a pre-agreed time or just until their allowance builds up enough that they can put first and last month's rent down at a new place after a surprise eviction. "Not worried about you, mind you," he joked. "But I don't want Smokey not getting his getting his treats." I heard a hopeful meow from Smokey, and he pounced off the chair and padded over to me. Did he hear the word 'treats' over the phone? I wouldn't put it past him. But I was also just pacing through the kitchen, so he might have just assumed it was time.

"No, he's fine." I opened the seal of pouch I keep in the drawer and dropped a few treats onto his plate, and the cat no longer cared who I was talking to, if he ever did. "How've things been going with you? I haven't really kept up on reading reports."

"Oh, you know. Work. Spinning plates and dodging bullets, just like you. Though a lot less interesting than yours, more... depressing." A sigh. "Just had to deal with somebody committing the old Family Sin." I could practically hear him shaking his head over the phone. "Messed up one too. I mean, I know it's a Mandatory Report, but, honestly, most of the time it's a nuisance... what the fuck do I care if someone wants to make a family member an apprentice?" Apprentices were a long and revered tradition and, as long as you go through the proper channels and the Council thinks you're ready, they won't interfere. However, they also want to stop dynasties from forming, and as such, inducting family members into the community of magedom is outright banned. Not just for fear of new wizard families rising up and taking over the magic world, but also because your family can be your source of greatest joy and greatest pain, and with two mages in the same family, it's much easier for you to both power up off the same toxic dynamics. "But this guy was giving power to that to his four kids. Minors, all of them. Can you imagine having access to an extradimensional god while going to fucking middle school?"

With today's society, that was a horrifying thought. I guess in the past it must not have been so bad. Long ago, so it's said, most magical tradition was passed in families, and yes, usually parent-to-child, starting relatively young. This was apparently before--as Liz described it-- "White people colonized and gentrified magic." I don't know a whole lot about that, to be honest. The history of magic is not officially taught as part of a Warden's curriculum and not really well-kept in general, considering not only is it part of the secret underbelly of the world, but also any records and even memories could at least in principle be altered by patrons either by request or just on a whim. Wardens--being somewhat more resistant to memory alteration--have a loose idea that there have been massive shifts over the centuries where the structures and sometimes the processes of magic have been upended. There's still a lot of conflicting information and theories about why and how certain things have changed--and I'm still too new in my role to have a strong opinion on what's what--but some things are generally believed among Wardens I've asked. The Council, for example, has only been in 'power' about two hundred years--the Accords they follow have existed a little longer, in some form or another at least, and Wardens as a concept have existed a long time beyond that, though without the same infrastructure as today, they took very different forms. Before the Accords though, all our attempts at history get a lot murkier, and so Liz's theory of a new flock of mages high on European-style capitalism crushing local traditions into the dust is as likely to be true as Cascadia's theory of the patrons growing hungrier and devouring the old order, I suppose.

The ban against two mages in the same family is definitely a rule imposed post-Council, though. Which isn't to say there aren't exceptions, even today. Obviously, if two mages marry nobody cares as long as they don't try to pass the trait onto their kids. And, like most of the Accords--despite words like 'mandatory to report' and 'banned' being put in writing--there's a strong sense of 'rules for thee but not for me' to it... if you get away with anything long enough, it becomes accepted simply because you're too powerful to try and take down without a much better reason. So, despite the fact that this is a rule Cas and I are both expected to enforce, two of the High Council are mother and son. From what I understand there's also a pair of twins in Toronto who both make magic together and the Warden there apparently doesn't interfere, but Laurentia's not my jurisdiction, not my problem. And of course, there's the other major case I was aware of, where the Council did have to eventually intervene... far too late, and not because he inducted his daughter into magic or even because he sought and acquired political power but because a mage that unstable, that willing to sacrifice other people to fuel his magic--and, frankly, that stupid on a fundamental level--in a position like that was just a danger for everybody. That's not even been fully resolved, just... mitigated. Half-measures, and selective enforcement, it's a wonder how the Council survives.

Then again, in some respects it's a good thing they're not more stringent. I don't think I could be a Warden if we didn't have a lot of discretion. "How'd you deal with it?" I asked, worried I might not want to know. I liked Cas, and am forever grateful for the help he's given me, how he personally came down to my district after Liz was murdered instead of just sending a deputy... but he was a lot more willing to employ the ultimate sanction for mages breaking the rules than I was. Sure, I've killed before, when absolutely necessary, but I couldn't do it for a lot of things on the ban list.

Luckily dynasty building isn't one of those Mage sins where death was mandatory. If they fight it, it can turn out that way, but if they go along with things then excommunication may be all that's necessary. "What could I do?" Cascadia asked rhetorically, and my heart sank. "I made them muggles again." Good. "But I hate having to send guys into schools to abduct kids, you know? That's how you gotta do it, to minimize your risk, put all your pieces in place and then go after them all at once, while they're separated, so they can't defend each other. But so much can go wrong, and when it's kids, it's fucking stressful. Not to mention the excommunication itself, which I can't even delegate. I should have killed the father, just for putting me in that position. Easy enough to make it look like an accident for everyone else, but... shit, I had to look into those little eyes when I took away the one thing that made some of those kids feel special. Even if I wipe their memories of magic being real, you can't completely erase that feeling of loss, you know? I didn't want to make them orphans on top of that. Even if he deserved it." He let out a breath, ragged, but either Cascadia was relieved to be able to talk about it finally, or he bottled it up again. "Anyway, enough about my problems. You called for something, right? Not just to catch up?"

"I... just need some advice. I ran into somebody and... well, the truth is, it might be nothing worth bothering you over. But I was visiting a college campus and I ran into somebody and... I know it's going to sound crazy, but I'm worried I might be dealing with another Nobody. He hasn't actually done anything yet, mind you. I just need to pick your brain about them."

The phone went silent for a few seconds. Then, he said, "I mean, I'll tell you anything you want, but you've gotta report a Nobody to the Council, Cal. Even if you haven't witnessed him explicitly breaking any of the Accords. That's what mandatory report means, the transformation is the crime."

"I know, I know, but... only on confirmation, right? That's my dilemma. I'm not sure that's what's going on. I'm worried I might just be jumping to conclusions. Hell, I don't even know for sure if the guy's a mage, much less a Nobody."

"Fine, then lay it out for me. What pinged your radar?" he asked, then had a guess of his own. "Other people not remember seeing him? That could just mean ordinary stealth magic, not that he's a Perpetual." I'd never met one of that variety--I've only ever met one period, unless this guy counts--but Cas told me about the rare Perpetual Nobodies before. They wiped the memories of everybody they met on an ongoing basis - but although their initial erasure covered everybody, people resistant to memory alterations could usually avoid the ongoing effect. Presumably much more dangerous, but they had to offer up significant additional pain beyond severing themselves from everyone and everything they knew, so were rare.

"No, it's just..."

"Did he say something suspicious?"

"I didn't actually even talk to him."

A pause, followed by a skeptical, "You just... looked at him and got suspicious? Hey Cal, remember, you know colleges often have excellent gyms, right? Not everyone more ripped than you is secretly a wizard, much less a Nobody." There was a little bit of teasing there as, although I was bulkier than Cas, I was hardly one of the most muscle-bound wizards there were.

"It's not that." He didn't even seem particularly unusual in that respect, though I suppose he could have been super sculpted under his clothes. I was growing more and more aware how silly this sounded, at least if I wanted to hold back as much as my instincts told me I should.

But I'd already made the call, and he pressed. "Come on, Cal, I know you're not the type to jump at shadows. Even if you're not sure, you must have something. If it's just random gut instinct, yeah, you absolutely can't report it to the Council, but say so."

"It's a little more than that, just..." Secrecy among Wardens is almost a reflex. Cascadia might know my name, and he'd been discreet with it, but I tried a halfhearted effort to learn his, just to even the score, and came up empty against the wards. But we'd spent a lot of time together, tracking down that first Nobody, and I trusted the man enough to give him some of the story I hadn't yet told anyone else but Smokey. "Here's the thing. I... I lost someone, someone I cared about. Stopping the meteor."

"Oh." The word was restrained surprised, restrained judgment, maybe, though I thought I felt some sympathy over the line, too. "Estrangement's a dangerous path, man."

"I wasn't exactly given a choice. Sometimes there's no time for negotiation." He grunted his agreement, waiting for the other shoe to drop. "So I was checking up on her. Just to see if she was okay."

"So you still care."

"Yeah, the Estrangement was all one-way." Which probably made it better, from his perspective. "My patron didn't just make her not remember me, but moved her so I wouldn't run into her."

"Makes sense, if it was one-way." He probably thought I meant a girlfriend.

"There was somebody else at the college she's at. Somebody I remembered from her old college."

There was a pause on the line, but he said, "I'm still not seeing what's suspicious here."

"I don't know if you've ever had to do an Estrangement to fuel a spell..." I gave him space to answer, but he wasn't forthcoming, so I continued, "But in this case, nobody was supposed to remember we ever knew each other."

"And he remembered?"

"No. At least, I don't think so."

"So, again...."

Understanding how this looked didn't make it any less frustrating. "Why move him, though? Like I get my patron moving her. He was deliberately making it hard for us to reconnect. But putting some random guy--a guy she doesn't even know well--at the same college with her, too?"

"Wow, you've really got a thing for this girl."

"It's not like that, I..." Yeah, he definitely thought it was a girlfriend I lost. I was still so ashamed about what I'd done that I didn't correct him. There are levels to everything, and Estrangement of family was much worse than someone you've dated for a bit, sure, but... it was more than not wanting him to think less of me.

So he stuck with his own conclusions. "Look, Cal, I get it, you're jealous. It's natural. Hell, if finding her was the hard part, maybe you can even get back with her. But just because the same guy's with her doesn't mean anything unusual happened. Maybe he transferred. There are actual coincidences in the world, you know. Remember, if he was a Nobody, you wouldn't remember him either. Not the specifics, anyway. A sacrifice like that is strong enough to punch right through our natural Warden resistances. Maybe you'd get a sense that he was familiar, but..."

"I'm worried he might have already been a Nobody before that. Like maybe he was watching her, that he'd made the connection between us... but after the meteor, Gnarly made him forget me but not her."

That seemed to get him. "Huh." He pieced the rest of the logic together. "So he's left watching her, not knowing why." He took another few seconds considering the possibility. "That's... that's quite a theory. But you also might just be a little hypersensitive thanks to what happened to Liz. It's kind of a assbackward way to do things, and Nobodies are super rare anyway, right? You don't strike me as the kind of guy who'd build up the kind of enemy who hates you that much." By definition I wouldn't remember if I had, but I could see it happening just because I've seen mages get super entitled and a Warden's one of the few who can take it all way.

Still, he had a point. "I know it sounds paranoid. Honestly, I'm not even a hundred percent sure it's the same guy I remember before. That's why I'm not reporting to the Council yet. I'm just... looking into it."

"So, a maybe. You don't have any evidence he's even a mage..."

"I do know magic was done in her area that night. I found blood, tested it. No one was tracked as being in the area."

"Okay. But still. There are a lot of us, and you know how reliable Council tracking is. Where was this?" I told him. It was a big campus. "I can check my own sources, see if I can trace anyone, but you're out of my District so it's a longshot even if it's not a Nobody. And if it is... you're going to want to approach it very carefully. If he sacrificed everything for revenge and now doesn't even know why... he could just be waiting for any sign of another mage. Might be ready to kill you, your girl, you, even random civilians, just because he thinks it's his last chance."

"That's why I called you. You are the expert in Nobodies."

He scoffed, repeating derisively, "Expert. Maybe local expert at best. I've only ever taken down three." When he came to help after Liz's death he'd told me that after his first, he'd done some research into them, negotiated with his patron about some of the rules, a kind of meditation that is more... unpleasant than the usual quick 'this is the price that magic will take' conversations you normally get. To me, that made Cas as much of an expert as anyone I'd heard of. "Do you need me to come down and help?"

I appreciated the offer, even if I could sense it was something he really didn't want to do. "No. Not yet, anyway. I'd just... appreciate your insights. Any tricks you can share. Places to start. You tracked down the last one." I helped, sure, but he took the lead.

His voice shifted slightly, mentor mode, the tone he'd take when he was explaining things to a noob like I was back then. "We can't say for sure what trade any given Nobody's made, but they're usually warded against searches, and more powerful than your average mage." Sacrificing so much made the relationship between a mage and their patron tighter, like a pet owner who knows their pet can't survive without them anymore... luckily, being Wardens also tend to make us more powerful than average. "Attempting to scry on this guy directly would probably confirm whether he is one or not, but also expose your interest. With the last one, that wasn't as much an issue, because he'd already made his move. We could afford to try different things and find his weak point. Not a safe option here. Considering he's a student, we can at least rule out a Perpetual Nobody here." While he didn't fit the criteria because Allie remembered him, that was a point. I didn't know for sure if he was legitimately a student. It could be he only convinced other students, and was playing the same game I was. Before I could bring that up, he went on, "If he's been there any length of time, he's probably constructed a false identity, but that might not stand up to close scrutiny, so that might be your starting place. Find the name he's using, and dig. Stay close to your girl, and try not to use magic around him. At least, not yourself." I could hear the sound of his fingers snapping over the line. "I know someone. A mage friend of mine, she just moved to your area. She's good at creative snooping, and might be willing to help out, for a price."

I still wanted to handle this alone, but what he said made a certain amount of sense. "I appreciate that."

"I'll text you with some contact details. Until then, the important thing is to move slow. If it is a Nobody, and keep in mind I still think it's probably not, you need to find out as much as you can of his abilities before he finds out about you. Once you confirm, the Council will give you a little more help, but the pressure will also be on, to act. You won't have much time for recon. The other question that occurs to me is... what's the endgame? And what's his endgame now? I mean, if your theory's right, he's been watching this girl, probably to get a bead on you. But now he doesn't remember you. So why's he still there? I mean, if it was me--if I was so far gone that I did that to myself just to get close to my enemy--I'd be tempted to just kill her and hope that hurts you. How long's he going to wait for a wizard to show up that might be his target? Unless he's got another goal and taking out the local Warden was just step one. In which case, he might still be working on those plans. He also could be working on reversing his condition."

"Wait, what?" That got my attention, because... "I thought that wasn't possible? The whole point of becoming a Nobody is to sacrifice everything to get your revenge. And you can't use magic to undo the cost of other magic." But if a Nobody could undo their Estrangement, maybe there was a way to do the same with Allie?

"I mean, you should know better than that. Sure, that's usually true, but our patrons aren't robots... they can even change their minds, though it's rare as fuck." And usually, the theory went, they didn't actually change their minds at all but it was part of their unfathomable plans all along. Of course I had probed Gnarly several times about the possibility of making Allie my sister again, and I knew that wasn't an option for me. "But even if they won't let you directly reverse it, there are ways around it. Come on, you've never asked Mom for something when Dad said 'no?'" Not for a long time. "Another mage's patron can sometimes bring back something you've sacrificed, but it's dicey. Usually you'll have to pay a lot more than for the initial spell... I mean, that's pretty much always going to be the case." I knew all this. I hadn't meant literally you can't use magic to undo other magic thing... it's just dangerous as fuck. What I meant was I'd never heard of a transformation as big as a Nobody getting undone. It seemed like the kind of thing the patron would disallow outright, and no other mage would attempt to circumvent that decision on their behalf. Much like an Estrangement. "The other possibility comes up if you work it out in advance. Enough time communing with your patron, and if you're a skilled enough negotiator, you might have left yourself an escape clause out of being a Nobody, some complicated scheme that reverses the estrangement and gets your life back if you complete it. If this Hypothetical Nobody thought ahead, and the revenge motive is gone, he might be trying that." That could be a Nobody's goal, but sadly, it was too late to try that with Allie.. the time to try and set that up would have been when the meteor was bearing down on us. Our contract was complete. "If he hasn't set something like that up, his best route is collective magic. If you've got enough people, that could--potentially--undo even a Nobody-sized sacrifice. A college is a ripe place for impressionable youths. You've just seen how dangerous a cult can be."

"Shit." That sounded plausible. Or at least, it was unrealistic to assume he was just sitting there, twiddling his thumbs, waiting for another mage to show up. He had to be doing something and for a Nobody to start a cult under the radar might be even easier than an ordinary mage. The blood I found could just as easily be a recruit.

"Yeah. So, like I said, you should try and stay close to your girl. If you're looking for permission or whatever about whether it's ethical to try and resume a relationship when she doesn't remember you, you've got it. If you ask me, if you do still care about her, it's a hell of a lot more ethical than not being there to make sure she's not getting involved in anything she shouldn't. Because with cults? Sometimes the first thing the leader is willing to sacrifice for his goals is all the followers. And that's not even considering the Council's reaction if they take a hard line." A cult of mages started by a Nobody might be considered tainted, everybody in it needing to be punished, beyond mere Excommunication. Well, I was the only Warden in the District, and I wouldn't do it if it meant hurting Allie. To hell with the Accords.

"Right. I definitely don't want her getting involved with him." Even if I was completely wrong and there was just an ordinary mage in her orbit, the thought of one being around Allie made my protective instincts rear up, considering how few hard-and-fast rules there are against using their powers irresponsibly. Cascadia's blessing wasn't necessary, but it made me feel better at least. "Thank you."

"It's what I'm here for. And hey. If this is an actual Nobody, and you can't handle it... don't hesitate to call. I wouldn't say no to a little working vacation in Sunny California. Maybe you can even introduce me to this girl." Cas had actually met Allie, once, briefly, in the aftermath of Liz. I wondered if he still remembered, if his resistance to memory manipulation stood up to Gnarly, but I wasn't going to ask. There was a brief but total absence of sound on the other end, like I'd just gone on mute. "Listen, I've gotta deal with something one of my deputies just brought in. I'll send that contact information and anything else I can think of that might be helpful. Take it easy and go slow. I know how tempting it is to rush, but I promise you'll be better off if you don't. That advice works for the relationship, too."

I thanked him again and let him go to handle his other business. Even if Cascadia didn't give me the kind of One Weird Trick For Dealing With Nobodies that I was hoping for, and some of his advice was stuff I was already planning, I came out of that talk with some confidence and a contact, both of which made me feel better. The contact turned out to be in LA, and was more an address than anything else, so I put off making the introduction, especially since I wasn't sure I wanted to use her. I'd follow the advice, take it slow, and just stick to recon for now, see if--without using magic--I could ferret out the name the guy was using and then look into his backstory, like Cas suggested.

That weekend, I didn't contact Allie, and she didn't contact me. That might have been because she was trying to give me space so as not to seem like she was coming on too strong, or that she was worried I was busy with a paper--or she was busy with her own--but regardless, I heard nothing from her and didn't want to be in her orbit in case the Nobody did make me as a mage and was looking for me just as I was looking for him. I expected he'd be sloppier about it, confident that I just wouldn't see the threat coming, but my own wards didn't detect anything. Either at home or when I went to fetch my car. I had to consider that a good sign. I monitored her Twitter, and that of her friends--who I was able to find easily, having met them--and nothing seemed amiss there, and although Allie didn't post a lot, Vani did, and I imagine she would have said something if anything unusual happened to one of her friends.

Still, every day I didn't see her I got anxious. So, when Monday hit, I made my way to campus and pretended to be a student... which in my case meant not going to classes and just hanging out in public areas where I could look like I was studying. I was hoping to 'accidentally' run into her, or catch sight of my suspect out in the wild. Either might be a win, but schools are big and lots of faces rush by... even the ones you're interested in can get lost in the crowd. When I noticed the flow of people starting to head towards the dining halls, I decided to send off a text, asking if Allie wanted to grab lunch.

Minutes ticked by and no response came. I could feel that gnawing in my stomach, but told myself she was probably just in the middle of a class rather than in danger. I hadn't gotten around to finagling a copy of her schedule yet. Or insert myself into the school's roster. I figured I'd do all that at once--as well as get the whole list of students and faculty, so I could start the slow process of elimination and ideally finding my suspect's name that way if nothing else worked--towards the end of the day. I could possibly do all that remotely with magic, but it's always easier the closer to the source, and, a place like this, sneaking around the administrative offices just after closing is actually better than the middle of the night, there's more plausible deniability you can enhance with magic. Lunch break might also work, but I didn't want to skip out on my best chance of a chance encounter with Allie. I'd gone weeks without seeing her and thought I'd come to peace with a life without her but now it felt like I was addicted to being in her presence again, the comfort of knowing she was okay. Part of it was the danger I suspected she was in, but it was more than that too. I don't flinch much at willingly causing myself physical pain anymore, but it's hard to give something up that makes your whole life just that much more bearable.

Allie might not know me anymore, but I still knew her, so I chose a seat near a sandwich-and-wraps shop and moved my 'pretend to be reading' act there. It served the kind of low-effort food she'd probably grab when she was between classes, nothing too messy or distracting and could be eaten one handed as she used another hand to scroll on a laptop read a book or worked on something. And they sold falafel, which I only ever found okay but was sometimes her first choice for some reason.

That knowledge must have paid off, because finally I spotted her, walking, seeming lost in thought--probably seeming just lost to other people thanks to that resting waif face--and maybe walking on autopilot. She hadn't seen me, so when she started to line up I got up and made a beeline for her. "Hey!" She looked at me and for a moment I saw a her eyes widen with what seemed like pleasure, but then her face closed up. Was it the attraction thing, and her pushing it down because she was trying to stick to 'just friends'? I felt bad about encouraging that thought, but at the same time it felt me with a disturbing pleasure... and besides, Cas was right, I needed to stay in her orbit. "I'm glad I ran into you. Thought maybe you'd want to grab something to eat."

"Yeah? Did you just get out of class?" There was a steely edge to her voice that made my skin prickle up, convinced something was wrong. She was acting casual, but too casual.

"Well, not just," I admitted. "I've been here a little while. But I still haven't eaten yet." Well, a mini-bag of chips. I didn't count that as a lie, it wasn't lunch, which was what I was proposing. "So what do you say?"

"I don't know, Cal." Something in her voice again, something about the stress she put on my name. "I mean, lunch with a friend sounds great." I waited a few seconds, hoping she was just weighing whether she had time to sit down for a meal, but my suspicions were confirmed when she added, "I'm just not sure that's what you are."

"I'm sorry?" I asked. "Did I do something?"

"Wow, really giving Sherlock Holmes a run for his money there, huh?"

My mind raced back over our last interaction... sure, there was a moment where I thought... maybe I'd disappointed her, somehow, but she had suggested grabbing a bite to eat sometime right after that. Unless she was only being polite. Of course, there was also the possibility that the Nobody had made up some story, preemptively poisoned her against me. "Look, Allie, whatever..."

"It's Alyssa," she snapped. "You don't get to call me some cute nickname if you're going to lie to me." I just stared at her, completely at a loss. "Why are you here, Cal?" she asked after I was stunned for too long. "I mean really?"

I still wasn't sure what I was supposed to say. Because as much as I tried not to, I lied to her in so many ways. Every interaction between us since the meteor was built on a deception. I just didn't know which she'd caught onto, or how.

Finally, she decided to reveal where I'd slipped up. "Because I know you're not actually registered in any classes here."

Fuck. I guess I really should have taken care of that over the weekend.

Chapter 10

I don't know how long I just stood there, a dumb look on my face. It felt like a long time, as my mind raced through possibilities. I've had to lie in my line of work, more than I'd like, and sometimes I've gotten called on it. Rarely the play is to stick to the lie and try to brazen through it. This didn't seem like one of those times. Allie didn't really seem like the type to bluff. More than that, it would be a relief to be able to stop lying... or rather, lie less. I still couldn't tell her the real reason I was there. Even when you want to be honest, when lies are far more plausible than the truth, when the truth might be actually dangerous, what else can you do?

So I gathered myself. "No, you're right. I'm not actually registered here. I was hoping to change that, but I've been auditing classes recently."

"So you lied."

"Yeah."

"Anything else you lied to me about?"

"I mean, probably..." I admitted, hoping the nervous smile I formed looked a guilty and remorseful rather than smug, but I could feel the instinct to hide. It wasn't just Allie confronting me that made me squirm, but the fact that we were standing in a crowded dining hall. It wasn't like we were the center of attention or anything, she hadn't yelled out the accusation in some overwrought way, but there were people watching the low-key drama while pretending not to be, and a few openly. None were people I was specifically worried about, but there's always the risk that there's someone you didn't even know was in the game was watching. "When you get stuck with one lie, others kind of pile up. Can we sit somewhere and discuss this?"

I could see her shuffling her jaw under a closed mouth, deciding whether to give me a chance. Eventually she must have decided she wanted to hear whatever explanation I might offer, because she said, "Fine. You find us a table. I'll get my lunch."

I already had a small table claimed but no lunch myself... I suppose I could have used the time to get some food as well, but I'd lost my appetite, so I sat and waited and decided how to approach this. When Allie finally sat down in front of me, she didn't say anything. She didn't dig into the falafel on her tray either, just looked at me for an explanation. I decided to start with a question, "So, how did you find out?"

"Does it matter?" she asked. "I've got sources."

Was one of them that guy in the bar last night, though? If he was, he didn't seem to be watching now. Although I hadn't properly set up my cover story over the weekend, that didn't mean I was lounging around. Cascadia's advice was to not use magic near the potential Nobody, and that was still my intention, but... there's magic, and then there's magic. The best magic is subtle, and a spell I cast in the moment is far more likely to be spotted than the use of an enchanted item or a ward, especially ones designed to alert me passively. This time, with more time to prepare, and much of the last few days spent in considerable pain, I could be even subtler than the broken mirror I used last time. A burner cell-phone, screen smashed, buttons sticky with my own blood was clipped to my belt. It would become painfully hot if someone was scrying on a person I was talking with, even if they just hit up against the Warden protections and were diverted away. Right now, it was fine, so I could probe... but not right away, because I could see Allie was waiting for an explanation, not a third degree. "So, yeah, I lied when you first approached me. I wasn't waiting for a study partner, I was just..." Watching you... that was the truthful way to complete the sentence, but I didn't think I could get away with that much truth, or the follow-up questions it might raise. Stood up might garner some sympathy, but I still didn't want to outright lie. "Thinking. I didn't expect I was going to keep talking to you, so I tossed off a lie, that, yeah, now I'm kind of regretting."

"For the record, I might not have been suspicious if you said you were a business major or something. But you had to go big with the pre-med thing."

"That's actually not... I mean, I was pre-med. Years ago. Life kind of... took another direction, and I had to drop out." That fateful day I walked in on one of my professors fighting off another mage, and she couldn't wipe my memory of what I'd seen. I was still enrolled for a while after that, but it started me on a whole new course. If not for that day I might be an intern by now. Then again, I've probably saved more lives on my current path than I could have from medical school, unless I'd gone into a research path and discovered the cure for something. "Believe it or not, I actually have tried to keep the lies to a minimum."

"So what's your real story, then? And keep in mind, you don't know what I know. Once I discovered the one lie, I did some digging on you. So you might as well tell me the truth."

Even leaving aside the fact that I would have to leave out the big real reason I was there... that was a trickier question than you might expect. It depended on whether she was just randomly googling me after a friend in administration confirmed I wasn't a student, or if someone with magical ties sparked her to look into my backstory... the results would be very different in each case. In the latter case, even if Allie herself wasn't part of that world, the Warden protections would still kick in (otherwise every mage would just hire a non-magical friend to do their research for them). If the guy at the bar tipped her off, she might have been caught up in the identity protection net and been directed to some false information, and write me off as a hopeless liar even if I stuck to the truth. I tried for vagueness. "There's not much to say." I remember she told me she'd seen me on campus before we met, so it was probably best to stick with that one. "Since I dropped out, I've mostly been working. Life took another turn for me a while back and, for the last week or so, I've been auditing classes here. I guess I thought I might find something I was looking for."

"Something you're looking for, or someone you're looking for?" she asked, which got my attention, that flush of hope. But her expression was cagey. "I mean this 'work' you're talking about. You're a private detective, right?" She took a bite of her falafel finally, while she carefully watched my reaction to what she must have thought was a bombshell of her own investigative skills.

Okay, so she'd gotten that far. It didn't confirm anything one way or the other. The detective agency was the on-paper source of my income, but also part of my magical life, a cover if I need one for when my duties put me in the same circles as police officers. It was also a way for people in the magical life to come to me with problems with other mages they don't want to deal with themselves. And I did occasional let ordinary people hire me too, for side jobs, if everything else is going slow and I think I can help, although most of the time I'd refer them to other actual PIs. The trick was, my name wasn't actually anywhere on that site. Search Engine Optimization isn't magic, except when our patrons get involved. Thanks to the Council, the website came up when anyone searches on any name I give, unless I cross my fingers when giving an alias. Different Wardens have different covers like this, especially since the turn of the millennium, to give them a digital footprint, where not having one would be even more suspicious. Detective agencies are common, as are bodyguard services. Cas and his deputies came up as vaguely defined 'consultants.' Liz used to show up under for-hire tutoring services. Of the options given, being a PI tickled me the most... I used to like the Dresden Files books. People searching for detectives weren't likely to find me on the web, but if you searched for one of my names, the detective agency would be there... though, always quite a few search results down, unless I give a ridiculous name that has no natural search results of its own to hide behind. So Allie knowing my job means she must have googled my name, scrolled, and either jumped to a conclusion or poked around the PI site to enough to find the photo. I was betting on the latter, so denying it was a bad move. "It's less glamorous than it sounds, but it pays the bills."

She finished her bite, swallowed, and asked, "So?" I looked at her, confused a moment until I realized I hadn't answered her earlier question. "Are you just auditing because you're thinking about going back to school, or are you here investigating something?"

Given I just got caught out for an innocent lie, and how awful it felt, lying was the last thing I wanted to do, and I wasn't really thinking of resuming my studies. "The truth is, I am looking into something. I won't really discuss the specifics. I can't do my job without a certain degree of discretion."

"Does it involve me?"

Yes, absolutely. But another place I couldn't tell her the truth, it would only scare her. "Why would you assume that?"

"I don't know. Sometimes I get the feeling someone's watching me. But you evaded the question." Guilty. "And you seem awful eager to hang out. Maybe it's all a con, to get close to me, use me for information."

The thing about lying is, if you choose your words, you can lie just as effectively with the absolute truth. "I promise you, nobody hired me to look into you. Or any of your friends, for that matter." Then I hit on what felt like a brilliant idea. "You know, if you hired me, I could look into that, see if anyone is watching you. I couldn't take a job like that if I was the one paid to watch you, it'd be a conflict of interest."

She smirked. "Nice try, Cal, but I'm still not sure I want to hang out with you at all, much less pay for the privilege."

Yet she was still sitting down with me. Maybe charm could get me through this. "I'm just saying, my rates are very reasonable. I'd give you the friends and family discount."

"Still not sure I qualify. So at the coffee place, you weren't waiting for a study partner."

"I thought someone I was keeping an eye on might show up at some point." And she did. "When you invited me over, it seemed like it might make it easier to watch without seeming like some weird loner. But I stayed because I really was having fun with you guys. I just wish I didn't start it with a lie."

"Okay," she said, and something inside of me relaxed a little. "I could maybe look past that. And I don't think I ever did ask you what you did for a living. So is that is then? If there's anything else you need to come clean on, now's your chance, and maybe we can start fresh." Before I could answer, she added, "I mean, I assume you didn't lie about your sister, right?"

I remembered I'd told her I lost my sister recently, and that she reminded me of her. That was, taking a completely literal interpretation of the words, true, but at the same time I could sense I was on dangerous territory when I said, "No. I told you my life took another unexpected turn, recently. It's made me reevaluate some things, consider what's important."

"That sounds like it's the kind of thing that would." She looked sympathetically at me for a moment, and I thought she might be about to reach out over the table and touch my hand. Then, as though something suddenly, she said, "The thing is, though..." and the eyes turned hard, suspicious, like they were drilling through me. "Once I found that first lie, I kinda did a deep dive. Lot of stuff out there. Even found pictures of you in high school. I was right about the cute baby face lurking behind the beard. It was oddly compelling, you know, little peeks into somebody else's life." Maybe what was compelling were phantom signals from memories that had been removed, replaced. "I almost feel like I know you. Except... I never saw any mention of a sister. Even places you'd think there would be. Weird, huh?"

I had a flash of my sister telling me it was creepy and wrong to try and stalk somebody online, when I was trying to find out who was behind a screen name that ghosted me. The hypocrisy was not even a little amusing. My guess was that if she found high school photos, she might have easily stumbled on a certain online obituary. Did it move her, beyond mere sympathy, in some way she didn't understand? Maybe, but I also knew that it would now say 'survived by one son.' But even with the sinking feeling in my chest, there was reason to celebrate. All this proved one thing. Allie might have looked into my backstory, but it wasn't prompted by a mage... nor was my sister herself one. Even using my real name she couldn't have found pictures, family history, or other stuff from high school if that was the case. Instead she'd just find a flood of links to other people with similar names, or in the wrong place, and never any pictures that could identify any as being valid. If Nobody was starting a cult, he hadn't gotten around to recruiting her. Yet. "Families are complicated," I pointed out, hoping I came off as somber rather than evasive.

"Oh, of course. I'm not doubting you," she said, although I could tell she absolutely was. "I mean, you'd have to be pretty low to lie about a dead sister, right? I just meant it's funny how I could miss such a big part of your life. I'm sure you've got fancy private detective tools that wouldn't run into that problem, but an ordinary person like me could get the completely wrong idea about you. Of course, you've probably got a picture of your sister on your phone you could show me that would just erase all doubts."

I had a picture of my sister now, but it was the one I took of her the other night, and I'd erased it from my phone after transferring it to secure storage, so Allie wouldn't stumble across it while I was hanging around her. Now it seemed like the odds of us hanging around had dropped precipitously. "I can't show you a picture," I admitted.

"Really?" she asked. "Because I don't have a sibling, but I think if I did, I'd keep a picture, you know?"

I took a breath. "I wish I could explain." I didn't want to lie, but I would have, then, if I came up with one that was convincing. Every half-formed excuse, once I tried to judge it from her perspective, sounded false at this point. Maybe if she already trusted me, I could get away with saying that my sister never liked people taking pictures of her, but I'd lost that, and all I could think of was to ask for more. "Because there is an explanation," I promised her. "And one day, I'd love to tell you the whole story... but right now, there are reasons I can't. I'm sorry. If that means you don't want to associate with me, I understand. I mean, it sucks, 'cause getting to spend time with you was the best part of all this." I tossed my hand as if to demonstrate I meant college as a whole. "But I understand."

Through this, Allie just watched me, her eyes seemingly impossibly wide, shining blue, not drilling into me, but just... taking me in. Finally, they lowered. "You know, I bet you're really good at your job, Cal. Because I look at you, and... I want to trust you. I feel like I should. But my head's learned I can't always trust my heart, so... I don't know." She turned her head, inspecting the crowd, and then looked to her phone. "You're the one who wanted to take things slow, so... let's just go with even more of that." She started to shift, gathering her things to stand up. "I need some time to think, and I only have a little bit more time before class, so I'm going to go finish this somewhere without distractions." It seemed like a blow-off, but, as she picked up her tray, she added, "Maybe I'll see you around campus when things are less busy and we'll grab a coffee or something and see where we stand."

It was a thin lifeline, but I'd take it. "Sure. Or, hey, maybe I'll come to a Tabletop Club night." The moment the words tumbled out of my mouth, I knew it was a mistake, pushing for too much, like a prisoner just granted a stay of execution asking the warden for a weekend pass.

She looked down at me with what looked like pity, even if there was a weak smile attached, "Club room's for students only, Cal. I may not be ready to blow your cover just yet, but I'm not letting you use my friends, either."

"Fair enough." As she moved away, I said, "Allie." She stopped, turned back, but didn't chastise me for using the short form of her name this time. Maybe that was progress, but I had more immediate concerns. Right now it seemed like we had a temporary, uneasy truce where she wasn't quite ready to abandon the tentative bond we'd formed. However, if, after thinking about it, she made up her mind against me, I might not get a chance to talk to her again, not without her being even more hostile and that and stubbornness making her unwilling to listen. I wet my lips, trying to think how to phrase this. "I can't really talk about why I'm here, but... if you see anything... weird... or you ever feel like you're unsafe for any reason." I was going too far, making another mistake, I knew, but I'd already started. "And you probably won't, but if you do... just... you can call me any time, is all I'm saying."

She didn't say anything, just shook her head, whether refusing to entertain the notion or just astounded I would have the audacity when I was probably the one making her feel unsafe, and continued back on her way. Still, at one point she did glance back towards my table, and I think she smiled that she caught me looking, which gave me some hope it wasn't to be the end of our relationship. Unless it was a nervous smile because I creeped her out. I'd have to wait and see, give her space.

Though only so much, until I sorted this out. Her discovery of my private investigator job may have meant that it would be harder to watch her from a distance, and forcing closeness seemed out of the question, but it also gave me an excuse in her eyes for still being generally around campus, even being snoopy... as long as it wasn't directly about her. Allie said that guy that night shared some classes with her, and he lived nearby. I didn't know for sure if that meant he was currently in one of her classes, or whether he specifically lived in her building, but I could check others in the area, and check the student roster... once I acquired it. Of course, this assumed that a Nobody was actually registered as a student somehow, as opposed to just telling my sister he was, and that he actually lived where he told her he did. Though I'd put money on him genuinely living somewhere close by... on campus if he had a false identity as a student, just off campus if not.

Using magic around his building--any building that might turn out to be his, anyway--carried a larger risk of discovery. I'd work on tackling that in some magic-free way, relying on the limited genuine P.I. skills I'd developed (and memories of shows like Veronica Mars, which Allie and I used to watch together). However, I'd still go through with my plan of infiltrating the administration building today. Odds were slim he was watching that carefully, and since I no longer needed to insert myself into the student list (suddenly becoming a student would only look suspicious to the only person it would matter to), I could get the information I needed more or less passively.

That was my job for the remainder of the day, after a little time moping at the table, and then moving to the Attic where I could get an afternoon drink to and surveil the last spot I'd seen my target. All I got out of it was the drink, and enough time killed that I could meander into the administration building near closing. Normally a job like this would take three magical effects, all relatively minor. One for effective invisibility... which, in a busy place like this with--presumably--nobody looking for me, was really more of a 'Don't Notice Me' effect, like the classic Somebody Else's Problem Field. A second magical spell, to quickly bypass locks, and a third for getting what I need without passwords. If I really wanted to rush it, I could go more vulgar and walk through a wall or even teleport, but those are expensive... particularly precision teleportation. Jumping across a fold of temporarily wrinkled space is not that hard when you're not trying to reach a specific place, or if your routes are set up in advance, but an impulse jaunt popping from a public restroom to an office next door... nah, I might as well just walk directly through the wall. Both require blood, but that specific a teleportation would probably need stitches. That third spell, for getting what I needed from the computer without passwords, would be the easiest one at all, from a magical perspective, but was probably the one I couldn't do without. The other two, I was going to try and skip, in the interests of minimizing my magical footprint. I did have a ward on that protected me from cameras, an old standby in the magical world, grown vital in the age of smartphones, though it needed to be used sparingly lest the absence itself be a tell.

I know another mage that does it with foul-tasting gum made of expensive herbs, only activating while you chewed. He sells it to other mages, and despite the bad breath and teeth-staining side effects makes a pretty good living off it, but I was out of my last supply and didn't want to make an extra trip if I was already going to be spending the weekend in a lot of pain setting up wards, so what was a little more to make my own enchantment? Mine was more makeshift and fragile, and in addition to the initial pain investment would draw on some extra frustration whenever it was in use, and also risked making me more memorable in to anyone seeing me with their own eyes. I'd used the same recipe as a base for this and other enchantments before... a pair of glasses, reasonably expensive ones, prescription but for somebody other than me, and with the frames broken and taped back together at the nose. It's good for things I might want to turn on and off at will, but, like a lot of pre-set magic, can be destroyed easily if you're not careful. And wearing them too long leaves me with a headache.

Still, good enough for this, so I lurked in a bathroom when the office closed, The building would remain open for a while yet, and it might be some time before the administrative staff all filtered out, and there'd be other people to dodge, janitors, security, and so on, but--as long as you're dressed reasonably well--most everybody else assumes if you're walking somewhere, it's with purpose. They might make a note of you just in case something happens, but will swiftly forget you if they don't hear about anything... even if you're wearing dorky glasses. I think I made about three circuits of the building before making my move... enough to look suspicious to anyone watching security feeds, if I appeared on them, and the few people I saw were wrapped up in their own business and didn't even make eye contact. I saw a moment to make an approach on a closed office door, knocked to make sure nobody was in, and then got out a pair of lockpicks, hugged the door, and was in, in a matter of seconds. Well, maybe a minute. The physical lockpicking took longer than I liked, anyway, since I was out of practice, but I wasn't caught, which was the important thing. I did know how to open any locked door in seconds with only a credit card, but that does involve magic, and I was only planning to do that once I was inside.

There, I expected the magic part to be relatively easy. Even if the specific data I needed probably wasn't stored on the computer on the desk, the one there already had regular access to it, which was more important. As I've said before, magic and technology not mixing is one thing pop culture tends to get wrong. Bypassing passwords isn't too hard a spell on its own. Two-factor authentication can make things a little trickier, but it wasn't in play here. It's often less about the barriers as about how free the information itself wants to be, and to this particular computer, its... purpose was to give up this particular information when needed, so that would reduce the difficulty and cost of a spell.

One important caveat to all that, though. Some spells you can do relatively quickly, your patron understanding a sort of 'I want the same thing as that last time, willing to pay the same costs.' They can always change things up, demand a little more, but often Gnarly doesn't care enough to. Other spells you can prepare in advance, by charging up an item or laying in a ward, because the specific circumstances you'll need it for is pretty generic. It doesn't matter which specific direction a bullet's going to be fired from if all you want is to block it from hitting you. But searching through a database is the kind of task that's specific and intricate enough that I have to negotiate directly, on the spot, because I can't give Gnarly a real sense of what is required until I'm at the computer with the data (or a resonance-link to the data). Given their unfathomable powers they probably find out from anywhere, but I assume it would take the tiniest bit more effort which would cost me more than I could pay.

I wasn't worried about what the spell would cost me, here in front of a computer with the proper access. I was a little worried that Gnarly would see my sister in the data and make the connection, realize I'd gone back on the Estrangement. It was riskier than the meme thing, since the account names I was searching for in that case didn't include my sister's name or picture anywhere... but the college's files would. I tried to keep the request as general as possible. All the student and staff files, all the class schedules. Leave Alyssa completely out of my mind as much as possible.

Making the kind of deep connection to your patron is a little like trying to hear a song playing just at the edge of your perception, you do your best to block out everything else, let your eyes unfocus if you can, and just... let it in, feel the vibrations almost as much as hearing them. Only they're not coming from a wall or floor, but rather a certain object with resonance, in my case, my amulet. I hold it tight until the music becomes clearer, the softer notes between the loud ones popping into your mind. It's a weird feeling, almost like realizing you haven't actually heard the song before, just the band, and yet you still know the words, they're inside you, in your own voice. They're not even words so much as concepts, or... space for concepts, if that makes sense. What I'm feeling then isn't Gnarly talking, it's just... presence, presence beyond time and space, and just a tiny fragment of attention. That's when you fill the space with your own concepts, what you want, what you need, maybe suggest what you're willing to pay if you're bold or it's a common request. I projected my desire for the information to be transferred to the USB, trying my best not to think of the elephant of Allie being involved, just focus on the wide set of files I wanted. I felt--or more probably imagined--a slither past my brain as some mental tentacle of Gnarly reached out, peeked over my shoulder to see what would be required to make that happen and then the knowledge filled my brain of what I would have to give up.

I was a little surprised. I expected blood, or pain. Maybe some property loss, I came prepared with some cash on hand I could burn if I had to. Those are the usual prices for my everyday magic, which is probably about the average, although some mages get their patrons locked on weirdly specific sacrifices. One mage I know has a patron who always demands his magic is paid for in illness. Maybe to that particular Elder God it's like finding a kitten sneezing adorable. With Gnarly though, for simple spells, simple asks, it seems less about what particular thing I give up as opposed to the willingness to sacrifice or suffer in the first place. This time around, though, they wanted something specific... my sense of taste. Not permanently, mind you. It'd need to be a far more important spell to require something like that. This was something I could theoretically do myself, it would just take more time, expose me to more risk. So, the sacrifice came with a timer... six days, fourteen hours, and seven minutes without being able to taste anything. Gnarly's time commitments tended to be either uselessly precise or frustratingly vague. Still seemed like a lot, compared to a little blood. Maybe he'd noticed what I was doing after all.

And yet... it wasn't that costly, either. At least I wouldn't be required to enable the sacrifice directly... I looked over the desk I was borrowing, noticed an ink stamp and briefly imagined myself having to press it repeatedly over my tongue to get the magic flowing. Merely consenting to pain or loss generally isn't as attractive to these beings as mages offering something up willingly... that's why we cut ourselves. It varies, though. One of the mages on the local Council didn't even do her own blood sacrifices, her patron made it flow from her eyes. Most of us, though, at least occasionally, have to cause our own pain to complete the pact. Maybe I'm lucky, since, when it's something beyond blood or property, Gnarly rarely asks I do the deed myself.... or maybe they just take a special pleasure in reaching inside me and taking something directly, something important. Here, Gnarly wanted one of my senses for a while, but... it wouldn't even be the first time I'd lost a sense. Or the worst. Several months before the meteor, I had to give up my eyesight for a few hours to wrap up a Warden assignment. Told everyone I had those funky eyedrops, but still, it was a pain in the ass. And senses aren't even as bad as other intangible sacrifices... suffering impotence for a month is embarrassing even if you're not especially sexually active and don't have to tell anyone. What was the worst that could happen with taste? I accidentally give myself food poisoning eating some of the leftovers in my fridge that are a little off? Deal accepted.

Gnaryl's power flowed through me, the words that exploded into my mind worked on reality better than any machine code and, once I mumbled them out, formed a metaphysical bridge between the computer and the USB key I brought, transferring what I required without so much as being plugged in. Touching the surface of the machine was enough. When the words finished, I felt a tingling spreading up my tongue from the tip, but it quickly faded. I wiggled it around inside my mouth, experimentally, trying to detect what 'no taste' was going to feel like, but apparently it was indistinguishable from the neutral taste.

No sense wasting any more time. I peeked through the window to make sure the coast was clear, then ducked out of the office, closing the door behind me, and before long no one would have any reason to question my presence in the building because I was on my way out of it, looking like any other student. I may have screwed up with Allie, but at least I was good at what I did, and thanks to that, now I had what I needed to suss out the identity of the guy I was so worried about. Maybe with that, I could at least keep Allie safe, and then walk way with a clear conscience.

Chapter 11

Of course it wasn't going to be that easy. Checking the student records was my first move, once I got home. Now, the information might have started in a database, but when I used magic to transfer it rather than just plugging the USB stick in and copying the files manually, everything appeared in a format I could use... albeit not particularly efficiently, but at least without any kind of proprietary program required to interface with them. I wanted the student files, and so mostly they existed as a series of image files... each one like a screenshot of what an administration worker might see if they pulled up that file themselves, although I don't know if that was literally the case or of Gnarly did some creative composition. Staff files were the same way. Timetables were a series of text files, sorted by student number. I could use more magic to better sort the data, but it was easier to just go through all the student jpegs one by one, quickly discarding to a side directory the ones that couldn't possibly be the guy I was looking for and I didn't otherwise recognize, lingering briefly over Allie's friends, and a little longer on Allie herself, where I was able to get a snapshot peek of her new life. There, on the image, was information I'd never gotten around to asking, like the exact name of her magically-revised high school (it was one I know our actual school competed against in sports, although I didn't actually remember knowing anybody from there), or her financial status (she was receiving some student aid for this semester's tuition, but not a staggering amount).

I made a note of her student number so I could find her timetable, copied that particular file to the same 'people of particular interest' subdirectory I put her friends in, and reluctantly moved on. It took the rest of the evening, but eventually I had to reach the conclusion that the guy I was looking for was not in the student records. It wasn't what I wanted, but it was still important information. That meant he absolutely had to be a Nobody.

Or not. Maybe he was an ordinary student auditing classes without enrolling, like I'd pretended to be. Maybe he was support staff at the school rather than a student, and Allie had gotten the wrong idea. Maybe he was an undercover cop for all I knew. Too many maybes, but... his photo wasn't part of a student record, so it was, at least, definitely evidence something was suspicious about him. Even were he a Nobody, he might still be in the data, of course, like Cascadia mentioned... a backstory invented by magic that didn't entirely hold up. Having a record that simply had the wrong picture attached was an approach a paranoid mage--Nobody or not--infiltrating the school might choose, if they wanted the best of both worlds, the legal excuse to be there while also making it difficult to trace your activities there back to the real you. Easy enough to claim an error if the inconsistency was ever noticed, and if you had other fake documentation that seemed to corroborate your identity, who would question unless your cover was already blown?

I was back to square one, but with at least a little more evidence that it wasn't just all in my head.

I didn't want to see Allie again so soon... or rather, I did, but I knew it would be better to give her a little space, so I thought it would be a good time to look up the person Cascadia referred me to. I wasn't sure if I was going to make use of her services, but I could at least feel her out. The contact point wasn't a full name, or a phone number, but just a first name and a location, a spot on a beach that she would allegedly be the rest of the week. A lot of mages do that, spend most of their daily life idle, relying on magic over any kind of day job.

Now, driving the Pacific Coast Highway can make for a beautiful trip, assuming good traffic and weather, but I'd rather not spend two hours or more on it. Especially on a day like it was. It's not actually always sunny in California, and even though we were still early for the May Gray, this day was a cloudy enough day that I worried the person I was looking for might skip the beach entirely, so I took one of the Warden Roads. They're actually used by more than just Wardens, the Council and a few of their friends used them too, but the exact mechanics of how they work and the complete map was still kept secret from most mages, and the official purpose is to let Wardens like me get around our District to address urgent issues without too much time or an overly onerous sacrifice. Some are part of the public transit system, and I often used them to get home from official business without being traced. Others are lonely trails that, if you know the right methods, might let you disappear around one corner in one city and appear on a similar trail somewhere else in the state (and even a few beyond). However, where I was going, I wanted to bring my car, and that meant going through Drive-Thrus. There's always a few Drive-Thrus in weird locations, where for a few seconds nobody sees the car, that are enchanted in such a way that you can transfer to another one, in another city. A lot of them are Starbucks... the spell's already paid for with collective magic, collective sacrifice, but paying too much for bad coffee lets you trigger the effect.

I actually paid doubly too much, since I realized I'd forgotten to eat that morning and so I got a breakfast sandwich. Living without a sense of taste wasn't painful so much as dull, and without the pleasure of sweet or savory sensations it's easy to neglect the chore of eating until your stomach actually grumbles. At least I discovered one thing to make it a little easier, and as soon as I got my order I drenched the breakfast sandwich in hot sauce packets I had in my glove compartment. Before, I'd use them occasionally to spice up a sandwich, now it was like a lifeline, because it made eating more exciting than just mashing up mush in my mouth.. So any debates you had about whether the burn of capsaicin counts as a 'taste' are moot, a being from outside all of time and space has weighed in. It doesn't. It's just a feeling, but in the absence of taste, a sensation is at least something. Even something painful can be better than nothing.

I pulled around the corner from the payment window, uttered a few words, and pulled out of a parking lot in Los Angeles. It's just that easy, when you draw on vast warlock powers and the regular blood sacrifice of hundreds of mages. No pain, although I did have to contribute... I was down to running on fumes on what had previously been a full tank of gas as well. You don't expect to teleport across the state and drag a two ton hunk of metal along with you for the price of a coffee alone, that's just the trigger. It suspect it took it out of the vehicle in a myriad of tiny other ways as well, a general acceleration of entropy that would make the car wear out faster if I did this too regularly. But better the car than me. Once I filled up again, I drove south, the long way, to the beach Cas had directed me to.

Even on a cloudy spring day, a California beach is still a destination, for tourists and locals alike. It's just not super crowded, with the water still being too cold for most swimmers, but you'll always find people. Cascadia's instructions led me to a beach chair far from the water, between two trees visible from a certain spot on the What3Words app. Could have saved me the trouble and just given me the words for the location itself, but I imagine she wanted a little warning of someone approaching and had warded the lookout spot to alert her. I didn't care, everyone takes precautions, and I was certainly taking my share.

The chair was empty when I saw it, but I approached anyway, planning to leave a calling card, a bit of paper I'd enchant so that only another mage could find it, with details she could use to contact me, when I overheard a nearby conversation. "Excuse me. Sorry. Hi there. Would you mind moving a bit down the beach?" I turned my head, saw a statuesque blonde woman in a one-piece swimsuit talking to two young men who were playing loud music. She pointed to the tops of nearby trees with a surprisingly muscular arm, and in the process her eyes fell on me and she shot me a brief smile that reminded me of Allie, then returned to the men. "It's just your music is disturbing the birds I'm here to see." The men looked about to protest, but silenced when she suddenly produced some cash from the canvas bag that hung over one shoulder. "For your trouble, if you'll just go like 200 feet that way?" I don't know how much she offered them, but it seemed like enough for them to stow any complaints and move away, and she started in my direction... not to offer cash, but clearly she was who I was here to see. "Sorry about that. I got the impression you're here to see me, and I didn't want to talk with all that noise blaring away in the background."

I paused, maybe giving her a little side-eye, because, well, the two guys she paid off were black and they were playing rap, so, it kind of triggered my red flag radar calling it noise, seeming like a white Karen thing to do. Though, as I looked closer, she probably wasn't white, though that there too... she also looked like she could be part Asian, and I suspected the blonde hair was a dye job. Then, as she sat down, things shifted. It's hard to describe to people who haven't seen this kind of thing, her facial features were more or less the same (although there were times I thought I saw someone else in there), but now her body seemed petite, even a little plump in spots, rather than like a exercise nut, at least a foot shorter, and for a second even seemed to have dark brown hair. At the same time, there was a feeling she always looked this way, and just my perspective changed. I was reasonably sure her body itself wasn't changing... that much, that fast, would have cost way too much for most people. More likely, there was some kind of glamour going on (we always spell it with a 'u when we mean the magical illusions), one I was partly resistant to, but it still made me as wary as the potential racism. Of course, glamours themselves aren't bad signs, a lot of mages are vain in one way or another, and enhance themselves in various ways, build muscle, cover scars, but usually they pick one idealized image to present to the world. This woman seemed to shift deliberately, which suggested a certain desire for me not to see the real her right away. "You're Haley?"

"Like the comet. So you're the new California, huh?" I gave a slight nod. "I don't want to call you California. She was California. So I'll need to use another name for you."

That threw me. "You knew Liz?"

"Not by her name, no, but we were friendly enough. Slept together a few times." I probably blinked a few times in surprise at that admission. Liz never really talked much about her love life, aside from a mention once that she was pansexual but that nothing would happen between her and me because she was training me and didn't believe in crossing that line... and I was too young for her anyway. Haley looked younger than me. Of course, there was no reason to assume Haley was necessarily telling the truth about having been with Liz, any more than there was to think her youthful appearance wasn't also a glamour. "We didn't stay in touch, though. I'm sorry about what happened, she was a good person. Such a shame she got sloppy."

"She wasn't sloppy, she was attacked."

If I snapped at her, Haley didn't seem bothered. She dug into her bag and pulled out a pair of binoculars that fit in one hand, countered with, "Which wouldn't have happened if she wasn't sloppy," and then aimed the binoculars at the tops of nearby trees. Maybe she really was here for bird-watching. "Too many people knew what she did, it was easy to narrow down her identity, even with the Warden wards. I could have found out her name if I cared enough to, and I hear she had more than her share of enemies." She pulled away from her view and looked back to me. "So, she got sloppy. It's not a sin, it's just unfortunate, especially in her line of work."

This stranger criticizing my mentor got my back up. Yet on some level, I knew Haley was right, because when I first learned about magic walking in on her in a battle with another mage, in the classroom she taught at. This wasn't the Nobody that killed her, this was some everyday mage she interacted with and wanted to take her out before she did it to him... and he wasn't the only mage who casually knew her identity. Liz herself admitted that she'd been lax in following the protocols that protected Wardens and their families, mostly because she didn't have any family left, aside from Smokey. That was one reason she made a special effort to impress the identity protections on me, even interceded with the Council to try and strengthen them and made that extra ward for my sister on my class ring. The logical part of my mind that knew all this--and knew I'd thought similar thoughts about her being careless, in private just after Liz's passing--didn't entirely dissuade the rest of me that wanted to defend my mentor when somebody else criticized her. "She was a damn good Warden."

"No arguments there. But she made mistakes. I just hope you're man enough to learn from them instead of ignoring them." I must have grinded my jaw a little, because she broke into a grin. "Look at you, defending her honor. I'm gonna call you Galahad, I think. So... Cascadia mentioned you've got a potential Nobody problem yourself."

"Have you dealt with them before?"

She put the binoculars down in her lap. "Not directly. But did your predecessor tell you her little theory about cat people and dog people?"

That seemed to confirm she knew Liz outside of just Warden business. It wasn't the kind of opinion she casually told everyone, more of the type of philosophy you share after a meal and a few drinks... or are teaching them. "Yeah..."

"I used to argue with her about that, because I'm neither." When she told me, Liz had admitted the division was a bit overly simplistic. Maybe this girl was why. "I'm more of a bird person, you know? I'm at the bleeding edge of our our ability to communicate with the Others, and trying to stretch those boundaries. But mostly..." She reached into her purse and shoved something in her mouth and, as she chewed, broke into a chirpy, artificial voice. "Polly Want a Cracker." She looked at my reaction--which was probably more of a non-reaction, since I didn't really know how to take the sudden outburst--and then, quickly swallowing whatever crunchy treat she gave herself, shook her head and let out and explosive snort-laugh. "Yeah, that's another reason she and I never really worked out. Never got my humor." She breathed out, became more serious. "But yeah, since I made my first connection... I've been spending a lot of brain power trying to learn the language of the Others."

"They don't use language..."At least, it seemed to me, it was feelings, just... knowing.

"Not as you know it. But magic itself..." Yes, you sometimes used words to enact a spell, but... as I understood it, it wasn't a language so much as vocalizations that helped time the flow of reality altering power. Like your cat might think that walking over your keyboard is sending a message that you want to be picked up, but it's not the specific keys Smokey steps on that gets me to do what he wants, it's the mere fact that he's doing it while I'm watching. Haley must have disagreed. "Incantations are not like our language. And it's only a dim shadow of theirs. Trying to communicate their way, it's like doing a bad lip-reading of a language you don't understand, full of syllables your mouth can't even form.The human brain isn't built for communicating in their way, that's why they take shortcuts in the first place when we make a deal. But that doesn't mean meaning isn't buried there in the structure, and with enough study, some patterns arise. That's always been my thing and I find I can get effects most people can't... or at least, can't without sacrificing a lot more." She seemed confident, and in fact, whatever glamour was working on her might have been reinforcing that, I could swear she was wearing a pair of glasses for a moment... and--if you're like me--even though you know there's no connection between that and intelligence, decades of cultural references have probably convinced a part of your brain to the contrary. "A lot of the particulars aren't very useful, but with my methods I can often work around wards and do things under the radar, even when other mages are watching. So I might be able to identify your target--whether he's a Nobody or not--and find out what his god's giving him, without being identified first. At least I can try. For a price, of course."

"What are we talking about here?"

"First, I'm going into an unknown situation with unknown wards, and like I said, I think I can do it, but nothing's certain in magic, and I know if I'm wrong, that's going to put a bullseye on my back. That's part of why I'm valuable to you, to take it off you, and I get that, but my skills are in subtlety and creative spellcraft, not fighting, So if I do catch any heat, I need you to be ready to play bodyguard. That's not part of my fee, that's just OSHA standards for the job. And you're a Warden, so you flying in for a rescue won't be suspicious to this unsub. So I'll be the decoy, but I need you to be on call, 24/7, and ready to drop everything if I even get a little spooked."

"That seems fair."

"Even if we make it a geas?"

A magically enforced promise was a hefty price. That would mean, potentially, she could call me because she saw a weird shadow out her window and even if I was rushing someone else to a hospital I'd have to leave them behind and go defend her. Well, I could technically break the geas as well, but it would be costly, maybe very costly. It wasn't that I was unwilling to defend someone putting themselves on the line for me, I just wasn't particularly comfortable with being magically leashed... but it was a reasonable ask. We'd have to negotiate the specific terms carefully, but... "I can agree in principle to that."

"Good. Now, for my trouble, and expertise... I don't know how long the job's going to take... my techniques are good but they're often slower, more methodical, you understand? If you need this immediately, I'm not your girl." I nodded. "But for specialist work, on-site, given the danger, my rate would be four hundred thousand a week, with a minimum four week commitment, call it 1.6 million dollars."

My mouth hung open. "Um..." I was expecting some sort of 'favor for a favor' deal, or maybe a few thousand dollars if she preferred to deal with cash.

She smirked. "Wow, you are new, aren't you? You've really got to start building up a hoard in your spare time. I know Liz had one." If she did, it wasn't left to me. "But fine. We can do it another way, since you're a Warden and we haven't met yet. I'll give you up to a month of my time. We can negotiate more after, if required, but all I want this time is a free pass."

I narrowed my eyes at her, noting that she was suddenly looking childlike. Innocent. Don't be fooled I warned myself, "What does that mean, exactly?"

"If--whether the Council orders it or you just feel I've crossed some line in your personal moral code--you decide that you need to try to sever my link to my patron, or kill me, or any other major sanction? I get a week's warning to give me time to leave the District or make any moves I need to protect myself."

I could get away with a magical pact to protect her, but as a Warden, allowing somebody to have that kind of leverage over you would break the Accords, otherwise Wardens would be too easily corrupted. "I can't..."

"I'm not talking about a geas, here, Galahad. Just your word. You strike me as a guy who keeps it if you can... but, I'm not stupid, obviously if I harm you or anyone you love, I know it's out the window. Likewise if I ever do anything so bad that you feel you can't afford to let me go. Shit, I go that far I probably deserve it. I'm not planning anything hinky... but you know how the Council is. Or maybe you don't, being so new. All I'm asking for is a certain professional courtesy, a little insurance in case I ever break one of their rules or they decide to make a new one to cover what I'm into. I try to get one in every District I'm in. Had one with the last California, never had to call it in."

I tried to picture Liz making such a deal. She always seemed so 'by the book.' Maybe she was that way after a bad experience. "Have you ever had to?"

She smiled, which turned into a smirk. "Ever been to Vegas since becoming a mage, California?" I had once, and she must have read that in my expression. "I didn't even need the money, they were just so earnest with that warning that I couldn't resist trying." Apparently that wasn't just a visiting-Warden thing, the whole 'Enjoy the buffets, take in one of our wonderful shows, but stay out of the casinos' speech I got during my visit. "I would have gotten away with it too, if I didn't get a bit too greedy. Normally, though, I play nice... honest. I just like to be prepared."

I had a sudden instinct, which might have been completely wrong, but the guess allowed myself to indulge my curiosity anyway, so I voiced it. "Your need for preparedness... it got any connection with the glamours I'm reading of you?" They were a little too effortless, so they must have been something she did a lot, so much that she'd become almost numb to the pain of the cast.

Her head tilted a little, I thought it was a sign of respect at me having figured it out. "I mean, that is a concern. I got into magic young, I had certain... self-esteem issues, made a few deals that probably weren't strictly necessary and I'm kind of stuck with it."

"Wait, that's..." I boggled for a moment at the idea, the change in perspective. I thought she threw up a glamour when she saw me coming, to obfuscate her identity, and then modified it to try and influence me--or show off that she could. Hiding her identity might mean she was wanted somewhere, or had made an enemy of someone powerful, and didn't want to meet with a Warden who might rat her out, until they had a deal. But what she implied... "They're ongoing? Persistent?"

"It was kind of my first big homebrew effect." That meant she was something like a Nobody herself. Well, not exactly, obviously, but in the sense of being a transformation, like a Vampire, or a Nobody, or some of the various demon types. The rules were permanently bent around her to support this glamour. Such permanent transformations were frowned upon in general, considered unsavory. Technically the Accords only banned specific variations known to be harmful... usually the costs involved were enough of a deterrent for everything else, but yeah, there were occasional talks about making any permanent transformation illegal and even if the Council didn't go that far I could see her being worried they'd add Haley's type to the banned list, particularly if she got it at low cost. "It's a subtle effect. Most mages don't notice it. Even slips by a lot of Wardens, so, well-spotted."

"What exactly does it do?"

"Like I said, I had self-esteem issues. I wanted to fit in. So, the magic helps. If that's what I'm trying to do, it makes people see the kind of person I want to project. Just in a physical sense, body type, face shape, and so on."

"So what, you're like... Mystique?"

It was the first thing that came to mind, but she seemed to enjoy the reference. Or maybe that was the glamour, making her light up at a geeky reference to be more relatable to me. "Not quite. It doesn't actually hide my identity, unless I'm using some other disguise. Mostly your memories shift along with perception change. Like, if someone's attracted to girls, they'd probably think that I look awfully similar to whoever they currently want to bang--more if I play it up--but they'd never confuse us." I started at the change she flickered through, probably demonstrating 'playing it up.' Again, the same face, but... yes, there it was again, the hair was darkened again and with that, there was definitely a resemblance, and as my heart started to pick up I was tempted to let my eyes linger on her bare legs, imagining a slightly different set of eyes looking back at me out of that innocent-but-lost looking face that reminded me so much of someone else. "That's kind of the default... again, I cast the spell as a lonely teenager and I wanted boys and girls to like me. I'm a little more picky about who I'm with these days, but being attractive still makes life smoother in a lot of ways, so generally I look like anybody's type. But sometimes I want to be taken more seriously." The resemblance faded, legs seemed to become skinnier, and even though she was still wearing a flattering one-piece swimsuit, in those difference there wasn't quite the same thrill at looking at her. Now, with the binoculars it felt like she was there for some serious reason and the outfit was just convenience in case she needed to go into the water, rather than to be titillating. Come to think of it, she would fit right in as a college student studying beach wildlife or something... until she shifted again and the lines on her face suddenly seemed harsh. "Or just be left alone. And if I focus on being aloof and unapproachable on someone I've already met, they won't think I'm somebody new, they'd just--maybe--think 'Oh, hey, there's Haley again. Why'd I ever think that ice queen looked like my girlfriend? They don't look anything alike.' You know?"

"Um... that's a little bit disturbing, to be honest." For a number of reasons. My own mental protections let me see the flickers, the subtle changes and be conscious of most of the influences on my own reaction to her... if that slipped by a lot of Wardens, did that make me more resistant than average? There was never a specific power level assigned to that, beyond 'enough to train as a Warden.' I was deliberately focusing my line of thought on this, to avoid what really bothered me... the fact that I saw her as resembling my sister, but those implications still danced around the fringes of my awareness, trying to get me to think harder about it than I wanted to.

Haley didn't seem bothered by my assessment--or aware of the more disturbing thoughts working their way through my head--but no longer seemed as unapproachable, either. Back to scientist-mode. "Too bad. I'm stuck with it now, so I might as well make use of it. And rest assured, Galahad, I use it responsibly. If you don't want to hire me, fine, but my particular gifts should make it easy to embed around the search area without being noticed. I can even look out for your girlfriend."

"I don't have a girlfriend," I said. Something clicked as I said the phrase, a justification to something I trying not to think about, but now that I had it, I realized it the rationalization I needed. I didn't have a girlfriend, though. That had to be why I saw a resemblance to Allie there, her magic choosing a fallback option since I wasn't particularly interested in anybody and I guess I didn't have a type. Or at least that made enough sense to give me a flush of relief... somewhere, deep down, I don't think I completely believed that was why I saw the resemblance when I did, but rationalizations don't need to be good, it's enough to have an explanation, something I could tell use to push those intrusive thoughts aside and focus on what was important.

"Sure." Haley flickered back to the resemblance I knew I shouldn't find sexy, but her magic aura thought I should... and only for a moment, to make a point. "Well, whoever it is you're worried about. Cascadia didn't mention specifics, but the Nobody doesn't know you, right? And you need me because you're not sure they even exist, so you're only inferring their existence from their influence, like how they detect planets by the wobble of the star they're orbiting. That means there's somebody there you care about, and you're worried if you investigate too hard, you might endanger them. So point me at the star in your life, and I can keep an eye on them for you, call you if there's trouble. No extra charge."

From that analogy alone I suspected she might get along well with my sister. But my instinct was to keep my sister isolated from the magic world as much as possible... I could watch out for her myself. The real question was, did I want Haley's help in this investigation at all? The idea of hiring sort of a human chameleon to catch a Nobody had a certain appeal, but I was worried I couldn't even trust any instincts I had with this person, because of that very ability. Sure I'm resistant to mental manipulation, but I still saw the shifts, still had some of those ingrained attitudes they worked on. You can tell yourself you're not going to let yourself feel a certain way, but the truth is, it's hard to logic yourself out of emotions and attitudes that are already inside you, just waiting for an excuse to come out. All you can do is do your best to be aware of the feelings influencing you--right or wrong--and make the best decision anyway. Logic can only do so much... and speaking of logic... "Yeah, I'm not sure you're the right fit for what I need. What if the target sees through your glamours, like I can? Won't that make things worse?"

"They're not technically glamours, they're..." She stopped, shook her head a fraction, thinking it wasn't worth making whatever distinction existed in her head. "Anyway, most don't, but if you prefer, I can turn that off while I'm there." That surprised me. Most people who transformed themselves had at least some aspect to their abilities that they couldn't turn off. "Or, rather, lock myself into a general 'don't stand out' pose. You only notice when I shift how I want to present myself. I've been playing with that a bit, but on the job... you'd either see it or not. And if that tips him off... well, that's part of why you want me there, right? To draw the attention."

I chewed a bit more on my inner cheek. That was a point. Attention on her was attention that wasn't on Allie, and it was attention I could respond to in my role as a Warden without endangering the one I really cared about. In the end, you have to make a decision and trust you're doing the right thing, even if your emotions were compromised along the way. "Fine. But I don't want you near my... suspicions. Just see generally what you can find out about magic going on around campus, who's using it, and if there might be a Nobody without tipping him off. Do you think you can do that?"

"Won't know for sure until I'm a few days in, but it sounds like something I can handle." Her lack of certainty actually made me feel better, that she didn't make ironclad promises. She also didn't seem to be making any more efforts to shift her glamour either, make herself more trustworthy, just... ordinary. Attractive in a bland way, but forgettable. If that was her default pose, that could work, almost like using a Nobody against a Nobody. She must have been able to read the decision off my face, because she said, "So I guess we're doing this then? All that's left to do is nail down the specific terms of our geasa?" Of course, using the proper pronunciation and plural form, it sounded a bit like 'geisha' but at least she didn't pronounce it 'gay-asses' or I might have burst into a giggle despite the situation and shattered the rickety persona of Warden reserve and dignity I usually effected. Instead, I merely gave a small nod, and she let out her breath in a sigh I've heard from people who realize they need to get back to work. She reached over and pulled out a pair of shorts, pulled them on over the bottom part of her swimsuit, then took one last look up at the tree through her binoculars. "Good bye, pretties. I guess I'll have to catch you later." I still had no idea exactly what she was looking at.

Now--no matter how we pronounce it--when mages use the word geas there are two different things we might be talking about. One is magical mind-control, the nefarious act of forcing someone to do something, whether specific acts or general behaviors. These are hard to do on other mages unless they're unconscious or you have a lot of time with them, or your patron is really generous. They're also highly frowned upon, with most egregious cases being against the Accords, although forgetting spells and low-level perceptual influences are allowed. Even though at their base they're the same kind of thing, the same type of magic, unless they rise to a certain level, we tend not to even call those geasa (or geases if you're a philistine like I was before Liz taught me how to actually say the word). If that isn't confusing enough, we also use the word geas for what is actually a completely different kind of spell, this one technically always voluntary. Of course this type may still be brought about through bribery or extortion or other nefarious means, at its heart, it's your choice to make the promise and bind yourself to it, and it can be broken later if you're willing to pay a serious cost. Even non-mages can break this kind of geas, although it takes a lot of willpower and pain. So, though we're not suppose to geas anyone (in the first sense), we actually do geas each other all the time (in the second sense), to make sort of magical contracts when trust is required but in short supply. Except, we're still super leery of it and tend to negotiate the wording with the same care as an experienced Dungeons & Dragons player does when their DM gives them a Wish spell.

I actually don't use either form of geasing magic a lot. With the first type I only ever use low-level stuff, nothing that interferes with someone's free will, and as for the second, I've been bound by several geases, but I've rarely demanded other people take them. Sure, I might occasionally have extracted a magical promise from a mage going just slightly over the line, to nudge them back on the straight and narrow, but otherwise, it's not my style. Here, though, since my sister's safety was involved, not to mention the whole 'free pass' I was promising, I'd need to make an exception and get my favor's worth. I just wanted to be careful, on both ends of things.

Because of that, Haley and I spent much of the afternoon hammering out the specifics of the voluntary geas that would define our association, and then binding ourselves to it in blood. As a Warden, I had to be extremely particular about what I'd promise, since I couldn't allow any geas to violate my duties. Haley seemed to be more easy-going, accepting my conditions about where she could use her special "power" with only a few minor amendments. She was actually pickier about the place we did our negotiating--although it was only when I was giving her a lift to San Diego that I found out why--rejecting several easy options and my dread at the negotiation only growing at each, as it took a good half-hour before we settled on a shaded outdoor patio of a restaurant within sight of the beach. After that, to my surprise, she was pretty open to most of my demands... but even there, it meant a lot of back-and-forth on specific points, defining exceptions, getting exact wordings settled. Technicalities mattered.

Even if someone's not trying to use a geas to screw you over, you can run into a lot of trouble, either by specifying the wrong thing, or forgetting to specify something important. I thought I'd done reasonably well, but of course I'd made some mistakes that I didn't realize until much later, and there were other things I might have specified if I realized what was to come. One of those involved the secrecy agreement... I'd wanted to keep this investigation off the Council's radar until I was sure what was going on, so obviously I geased Haley to keep the details of her work for me confidential, and also not to reveal or discuss anything about magic or mages to anyone on campus or known to operate there (with exceptions carved out for discussions of magic as a fictional construct, for talking to me and anyone I gave permission for her to consider an exception, and also time-limited so as not to screw her over if she happened to meet someone on campus years later she needed to be honest with), but I still made it a narrow geas that left a lot of opportunity for information I didn't want out there to leak out the edges. I wish now I'd been more strict about it, but I didn't expect anybody but the potential Nobody to care much about my presence in the area. That would turn out to be an error.

My other major error was my expectation that, on a big campus, Haley was unlikely to run into my sister and that I didn't need to put any special rules in place. That was a conscious choice... it wasn't that I failed to consider the possibility they might run into each other, just that I figured the odds were low and that marking her out as a person of interest, even as someone to not talk to, would still be putting her on Haley's radar, which I wanted to avoid. Allie's interactions with me proved she wasn't directly involved in the world of magic, and bringing her to the attention of anybody else in that world near her struck me as a bad idea.

Unfortunately the universe is a perverse place, filled supernatural beings beyond time and space can manipulate probability with ease... and even if they're don't have their tendrils weaving our destiny directly, sometimes I get the impression we're less like pets than like reality shows to them, and they like the drama enough to set things in motion just to see what happens. Even when it might well be coincidence, sometimes things run so perfectly counter to your plans that you can't help but think you've been targeted, and all you can do is wonder why you hadn't factored that into the odds in advance.

Because of course, the next time I saw my sister, Haley was already hanging out with her.

Chapter 12

I spent the next couple days at on the periphery of the campus, trying to narrow down the Nobody's living place, but I had no real luck. That's the problem with searching for needles in haystacks, a lot of the time, your work isn't going to pay off. Especially when you couldn't risk using magnets or other sensible tools. I did have a picture, at least... of sorts, copied from my memories with magic, leaving me with a a migraine that still lingered. Wouldn't have hurt so much if I could have traded the memory itself, but my resistance to memory tampering had its downsides. And although my memory is protected, it's not perfect. Most memory is impressionistic and prone to errors, colored both by your expectations at the time and all your natural biases and so magically pulling images out of it onto paper tend to give you something like an artist's rendering. How good it is--as well as the particular style--depends on the person remembering, the familiarity, and the emotions attached. While it's generally true that the better you are at drawing a scene from memory, the more faithful these kinds of pictures will turn out... even if you can only draw stick figures, magic can usually pull out a image that looks enough like what you remembered that somebody else might recognize it (except for people with actual face blindness, on both ends... and I'm not sure how it'd work trying to draw a picture of Haley with her weird mojo). That can actually be a good thing, since, if I found like a surveillance camera image of someone I could extract a perfect picture from that, but there are ways to detect magical efforts to capture your exact image... but a person's memories, they're too fuzzy to not fall under that.

My own magical rendition of the Nobody looked less like a portrait as it did a police sketch of a suspect that a witness had only seen a few times, and because of my paranoia looked distinctly shadier than was probably accurate for someone who could blend into a campus without any documentation or arising suspicions, but it was close enough to be worth a try. I gave a copy to Haley so she'd know who to watch out for and kept another to myself to--very cautiously--show people. There was always the risk that anyone I showed it to would lie to me and immediately tell the person I was asking about... even though Nobodies aren't known for forming strong social ties, some people just don't trust cops, which is what you probably assume of someone waving a picture like that around. I couldn't completely evade that problem without using magic to peer inside someone's head, which breaks my moral guidelines (and is disturbing, besides), but I was comfortable with a little memory fudging so the people I did show it to just didn't remember I questioned them at all. But you do that again and again, in addition to feeling dirty, the price of the sacrifice adds up, so my plan was to only show the picture to the kind of people most likely to have seen most of the people in a particular building. The superintendent. A hotdog vendor parked outside. Retired guy who looks like he spends most of his day on his balcony people-watching.

As I said, no luck. None of the people I'd asked admitted having seen him, and I didn't read any deception in their body language. It's hard not to feel disappointed when you spend that much time and all you've got to show for it is a migraine, congestion, sore feet, and a list of buildings that a wizard might not be living in, but as the saying goes, it's a marathon, not a sprint. For the same reason, I wasn't really expecting daily updates from Haley, the slow, methodical approach she told me about didn't seem like the kind of thing that would give me anything until it did. So when she contacted me within only a few days, I was primed to think either she got lucky and spotted the guy, or got unlucky and was in danger.

I was wrong on both counts, of course. She just wanted to meet to show me something. There were certain code phrases we agreed on in the geas, things she would say if she was in danger or being coerced, and, conversely, things she would say if everything was normal just to prove it was her and not someone hijacking her phone. The geas ensured it wouldn't be forgotten, so when she said there was something on campus I should probably see, I could take her at her word.

So on Friday morning, I once against started roaming the halls with the other students, keeping an eye out for the Nobody of course, but also for Allie... though I didn't expect to see her, as Haley wanted to meet me in the Arts and Humanities building which is a good distance from where Engineering classes were held. I had no reason to suspect she and Haley already met.

Normally, I'm pretty good at spotting people before they spot me... but normally, the people I'm trying to find don't know I'm there, and I'm more comfortable using magic to make me not stand out in their mind. Without that, my height and beard are good markers for people to pick me out of a crowd, particularly when they're smaller and have a tendency to blend into the background. So, I probably shouldn't have been surprised that Haley found me first, though I was.

Her 'don't notice me' status had been enhanced by changes to her wardrobe and posture and accessories since I'd seen her at the beach, so it took a second to even recognize her. She was actually wearing glasses now, not just a flicker from the glamour, but real ones, frames that were black and not quite thick enough to draw your attention to them, yet still broke up the lines of her face, and her hair looked like she'd just washed it and tied it into a quick bun but was in a rush out the door. Like so many other students, she had a thick backpack over one shoulder and from a distance, it was hard to pick out her figure from her clothes, baggy blue jeans and an unbuttoned plaid flannel top over a loose grey shirt. Of course, there's no reason anyone has to dress to flatter their figure--and in my case, I wasn't entirely sure what Haley's figure actually was, as opposed to the glamours--but her outfit served to make it harder for anyone to recognize her at a distance, much less draw the gaze of horny college students while there were others who were showing off much more. Every change she'd made since the beach served pretty well to make and keep her anonymous. If anything, the flannel might have stood out the most, but only because it seemed like something that maybe everyone wore on some in some parts of Cascadia, whereas in California it just wasn't especially uncommon. All of that, as much as her 'don't notice me' effect, probably explains why, even when she was right in front of me, my eyes glazed over and passed her by at first, until I heard her saying, "Hey Galahad. This way."

We didn't make a big deal of pairing up. She kept moving after she spoke, and I swiftly turned and followed, ignoring the tiny paranoid voice in the back of my head that this could be a trap, because the geas should have prevented that even if, for some unfathomable reason, she wanted to. It was just prudence, taken too far.

Haley led me down a side hall of classrooms and lockers, then she stopped suddenly at one point as though it might be her locker. "You should fix your shoelace," she said, and nodded her head to the bench across from us. "You're liable to trip, if you don't pay close attention."

I took the hint, stepped across to the bench, used the corner of it so I could reach my laces without bending over all the way, They weren't a hazard, not really, but once I undid them nobody would be able to tell, and while I slowly retied them, I took a close look, trying to see what Haley might have. Mages--and perhaps Wardens especially--tend to be attuned to things that are broken, out of their proper place, because they can be sites of magical power. I looked first for obvious drops of blood, then shards of glass, like from a phone touchscreen, or any garbage, then finally as I was looking for splinters in the wood itself I noticed it. A nail, not flush with the wood, too much of the shank visible, and the head broken, slightly, leaving a sharp edge. Nobody would break the edge of a nail head to fuel a spell, it wasn't worth enough to count as a sacrifice. Maybe you'd call the bench itself broken, but, no, it was perfectly functional... except... it could cause damage. Someone sitting on the bench, putting a canvas pack on the corner, might find it snag on that edge as they took it off. Or maybe they'd run their fingers at just the wrong spot, cut themselves, if it was sharp enough. A small risk, but it was there. Nah, it couldn't be... But even as I thought it, my eyes searched around for one more element that would make the theory fit, and I found something that might do the job. A stamp, like you'd get for the post office, but stuck to the side of the nearest locker, promoting a "Save Endangered Species" message. It wasn't a smoking gun by any means, somebody could have easily just put it there to be whimsical, like some lockers were decorated with band stickers, but the stamp would fit for a spell, if this was what I thought it might be. It was still the last kind of thing I'd expect while looking for a threat on the level of a Nobody, but... maybe.

I finished retying my shoe, and returned to where Haley was, spoke my crazy theory out loud in a soft voice. "That's not... a harvester?"

"Gold star for Galahad. Now let's move away in case it's being watched."

We kept walking, until we found another little alcove where we were out of the main hallway traffic, but still within sight of the bench. "But harvesters... I mean they don't really work." Conventional wisdom said, anyway.

Although I was being sloppy with language, something Haley was happy to correct me on. "Oh, they work, they're just usually more trouble than they're worth. Too easy for all your work to go poof, and you wind up spending more setting up the collector than you get out of it."

I was nodding along with her by this point in a 'yes, I know, that's what I meant' sort of way. "Right. And it's so slow and sacrifice doesn't store well, so... why would anyone bother?" Magic runs on sacrifice, of course, and considering mages are about as ethical as human beings in general, except with added entitlement, many eventually get the idea of using somebody else's pain or blood instead of their own to fuel the changes they want to see in the world. And that can be done... it's part of the reason Wardens exist, but willing sacrifices are always more potent, so the usual strat there is to trick or convince somebody into donating the power you need. Harvesters are nickle-and-dime, more thought experiment than practical technique. You set up something that's just... annoying, maybe a little bit painful, to a lot of people over time. The simplest example people use when introducing the concept is a mop and bucket in a hallway. There's no real hazard it's trying to divert people from. It's just in the way. People voluntarily slow down, sacrifice their time, because they're worried the floor might be slippery. If they're looking at their phones, they might trip over it. Maybe it's right in the way of a drinking fountain or bathroom door and so people who really need that choose to divert and suffer their bodily needs a little longer. All those tiny pains and inconveniences get absorbed, collected, harvested for later pickup. Now, before you get paranoid that the world is full of harvesters, no, most of the time an inconvenience is just from thoughtlessness or incompetence. To set up a harvester takes work, and magic, which means a good dose of pain itself, and as Haley said, it's easily disrupted, even accidentally. To continue the bucket example, just moving it slightly--where it's still in the way but now the path people have to take is different--changes the whole dynamics of the spell and the mage would have to re-enchant it to get it to start collecting again. So, sometimes you can eke out some overall benefit if you monitor it carefully, or do a high-suffering-but-short-duration setup, but almost always, if you just put the pain of setting it all up into whatever spell you wanted, you're be much farther ahead in your dark goal. This one was a little more on the sophisticated side and maybe it was providing some small profit over time, but the underlying economics didn't change... it would have to be a thin trickle of power and easily lost, and again, sacrifice doesn't store well. Our patrons want fresh pain, so by the time you gathered enough to do anything dramatic, you'd probably have wasted more than half of what you harvested. "Even if whoever set these up had multiple of these..."

"And they do. I've found two so far. Which probably means more. Spot one mouse and you might just have an adventurous little visitor. Two, and there's an infestation... you just haven't found the others yet."

"Still. Even with a bunch... anything someone could do with a harvester would be better with a sacrifice. It's gotta be some noob playing with the theory. Maybe a student the Nobody recruited?"

"Maybe. Probably not a student, though." I shot a question at her with my look. "The nail was hammered in like that, not pulled up. It takes access to set something like that up, keep it from getting disturbed. Same as the other one."

"Good point." The other thing about harvesters is that if they do their job at all well, eventually somebody complains, and the maintenance staff would have taken care of this raised nail. Unless whoever did this was on the staff. I took a breath, knowing both that I'd need to be double-checking the staff records I had and that they probably wouldn't help. "Well, it's a lead. Better to not cut it off, maybe I can spot him harvesting." As far as I know, long-distance delivery of the accumulated mini-sacrifices doesn't work... the same reason websites with suddenly bad UI aren't harvesting pain to make some Internet mogul rule the world. The pain needs to be captured near the site of sacrifice--that's what the stamp would be for--and the longer a mage goes without actually picking it up the more you risk losing it all. So this was good news, actually, even if our Nobody wasn't actually behind it himself. "Where was the other one?"

"There's a study room next to a music practice room. Some of the soundproofing's damaged... the idea, I think, is to harvest the irritation of people trying to get quiet time with people 'experimenting' with their music. For obvious reasons,. I chose to show you this first." She was referring obliquely to a condition Haley shared with me on the ride back from L.A.. As part of a previous magical sacrifice for... something, she permanently lost any appreciation for human-made music. She was cagey about the exact deal, saying only "It was worth it," and I didn't feel like prying, but was a little more open about the effects. All music--or at least, all that's been touched by human hands--is actively grating to her, which was part of the reason she was so picky about where we talked, and why she loves birds. She's really into birds. Since we couldn't have music on the drive home, I let her go on and on about the different species either live in or migrate through California. It'd almost be cute if I had any interest in them.

"Okay. Good work. You don't have to actually take me there if it's going to annoy you, just let me know the location and keep an eye out for others."

"That's not even the big thing," she said, which got my attention, because she'd already broken more ground on the case than I had just finding the harvesters. "Come with me."

I followed her outside and around the corner of a building, to an open area where with a grassy field between wide walkway, where students either crossed between buildings or relaxed enjoying the sunny day between classes. I had my eyes out for harvesters, and of course that familiar face, but I wasn't paying much attention to the buildings themselves, until we stopped in front wall. On it was painted a message of some kind, in neat, deliberate characters, applied with a stencil. At least, that's what it looked like. In the wizarding world you run into them a lot, we call them glyphs, and they might look like some invented language like Klingon or Elvish, or might be in the English alphabet but not form actual words, or form a Latin phrase that looks plausible but actually doesn't translate to anything. The point of them is, intelligent structure without content. They have zero information... at least not directly. You can obviously get some information out of their mere presence. Sometimes they're part of the cost of a spell, a patron forcing a mage to put effort into something that has no meaning, sometimes they're to damage an underlying structure as an additional sacrifice, and sometimes they're just some kind of rote symbol that a mage has learned as part of a ritual to cast a particular spell repeatedly without entering a fresh negotiation. The catch is, an outsider can't immediately tell if something's actually a glyph as opposed to just a message they don't understand... if they could, it wouldn't really be a glyph.

In this case it could have plausibly been some kind of alphabetic substitution or a short phrase in some obscure language. The letters looked similar, but not identical, to Greek. The real giveaway in this case only came on closer inspection, when I realized it wasn't... real, in a sense. By that I mean these particular symbols weren't actually painted there, they just looked like they were. It was a glamour... more than that, it was a message, mage-to-mage. This wasn't just a way to reduce the price of a spell, or a focus point. It was, itself, a magic spell held incomplete. The symbols held no content yet stood ready to transmit actual information--with content--under certain conditions. Once properly interacted with, or given enough time without it, the glyphs would disappear, leaving no lasting impact on the world. Both cheaper and all around more desirable for some kind of private communication you couldn't just text.

"That's coming from outside the campus," she explained. "It was put here, from outside, waiting for somebody to find it and unlock it. I'd say it's gotta be at least a few thousand words, too, so a little more than just a query letter."

"You can tell that?" It was only once I saw it up close that I could sense that it wasn't really paint, it just had a... vibe to it, from the magic power still being pumped into it, like the letters ever-so-faintly vibrated... this feeling was especially strong if I accessed the same kind of zoning-out I use to contact Gnarly, although when I actually called on my patron they were tight lipped about any other details. Haley was obviously right about it being projected, but mostly, the only information I got from Gnarly was a sense of 'none of your business.' No indication of a direction or distance it came from, no information on how much content the glyphs would resolve from if activated, and certainly no questions answered. To me, it looked like about thirty symbols... each one must have been doing a heck of a lot of work if a message inside was as long as she said. What was she seeing that I couldn't? All that I'd said about glyphs was stuff I'd been taught, but it was possible there was structure in the form of the letters themselves everyone was missing that she'd figured out. If so, I wanted to know, so I asked, "How?"

"I'm not trying to be rude here... I'm sure you're a whiz at your job, and I wouldn't want to go toe-to-toe with you in a direct fight, but... we're different specialties. It's like trying to explain high energy physics to a boxer, or chemistry to a baker. Both of them use the same underlying science, but one's just got an intuitive grasp of the stuff they need to know to do what they do, and the other really knows how and why shit works but can't necessarily throw a punch or make a cake, you know? I could try spend hours trying to explain my thesis project to you or you can just take my expertise and see the bigger point."

I still wanted to know, but I put it aside for a bit. "Someone's communicating with a mage on campus."

"I know it's not me, and I'm guessing it's not you, so, yeah, I'd call it a worrying sign."

"Can your expert skills break it?" Directly combating or undoing another active spell is always tricky. Sure, in certain contexts you can just cast another spell that has the opposite effect... like if one mage moves something from one place to another, another spell can usually move it back, because the bargain was made and completed, you're just making another one. If the words were literally painted on with magic, I could wipe them away the same way. It's another matter when you're trying to undo the terms of a bargain with a force of godlike power, even if you've got another on your side. It's not unheard of, of course, wards are broken all the time, but there the fragility is often worked into the cost... the more focused and airtight a spell is, the more it costs to try and unwind, almost always far more than it cost to cast, and usually far more than it's worth when you can find another way around it. Unlike D&D, Counterspell just gets mages into an exponential bidding war, so most magic-on-magic conflicts are waged by disrupting the circumstances of your opponent's spells, ending the terms of their applicability or finding loopholes in them. It's usually better to just lay your own schemes and bargains in, rather than targeting the other mage's spells directly... or to just kill your opponent, of course. Because if the casters of a particular spell are dead, then it's much cheaper to undo them. If I could track down and kill the caster of this message spell, it would become a bargain to read the contents, if I could get to it before it vanished. Otherwise, though, it was likely to be bulletproof - whoever cast it might have saved by making the mechanism visible to people who knew what they were looking for, but my moment of zoning out to inquire with Gnarly confirmed that the message was intended such that only an intended target could read it, and to violate that pact while the caster's heart still beat, I'd be looking at losing several limbs. But that was for me, the boxer, the baker. Haley clearly had some university-level tricks.

The grimace that screwed up her face proved that this wasn't going to be one of them. "No. I can get a sense of the size, that it's designed not to look new to non-mages. Which is because the terms are conditional, rather than direct." She looked at me out of the corner of the eyes. "That means the message's not addressed to anyone by name, but rather a series of descriptions."

"I know what it means." It was the difference between sending a magical message to Luke Skywalker as opposed to a member of the Rebel Alliance who is the child of a Sith Lord which might apply to Luke, or Leia, or some other character in the expanded universe you've never heard of but still technically qualifies. Usually, the more conditions you meet, the more the message stands out to you, so you want to choose things that rule out everyone except the person you want. Of course, if you add too many terms trying for that specificity, you risk the message being unrecoverable. Direct terms, on the other hand, are for sending directly to a specific mage. The existence of the message might still be visible to others, depending on the specifics of the deal you make, but you usually don't have to put it somewhere and rely on luck finding them. Sendings like this don't actually require names either... as I've said, true names're are way less important than magic in media would have you believe. A good enough personal knowledge that your patron can easily read the connection off you is all you need... though a name certainly helps.

"I can't tell you what those activation conditions are, at least not yet. If it's still here in a few days, I might be able to work something out, but I haven't really had time to carefully and safely inspect it... this just appeared. Which to me suggests you've got a leak somewhere. I mean, what are the odds this shows up today when there are no registered mages operating in the area? If I had to guess, I'd say somebody else knows you're looking into somebody here. Maybe not who, maybe not why, but they're trying to make contact before you do. Probably gambling on you not knowing the campus enough to realize this wasn't here all along."

"Not necessarily. It could be somebody like another recruit... somebody the Nobody's in some kind of regular contact with. See, most Nobodys can't be directly addressed in spells like this." It's expensive in general to directly target somebody in a spell long distance, but with them, it's pretty much impossible, "The severance magic cuts off that possibility, permanently. It's like... even if you know them, you can't really know them, you know? So you have to just describe them." It was nice to be the one to drop expert info for once. Still, even though it wasn't the only theory to explain the evidence, I had to consider the possibility she brought up. The only people I discussed my interest in the campus with at all were Cascadia and Kline. And Haley herself, of course. All three should have had some level of geas that reduced their possibility as suspects. Haley's were probably the strongest, and I knew the rules she'd have to be operating under... besides, it would be a little odd for her to point out the message if she'd broken them. I certainly didn't want to believe Cascadia would inform on me... though it was plausible he mentioned the case to somebody else as a 'just in case California dies' precaution. Still, he and his circle were too far out of area for me to really think that was a possibility. Wardens don't poke their noses in other jurisdictions much. That left Kline. Kline was supposed to be unable to reveal a Warden's requests on the Rolodex, but I wasn't there when he was first geased, so it was possible that the terms of his silence were loose enough that somebody compromised him, or the Council lied to me and he was informing them of everything I ever asked as a matter of course... or maybe his phone was simply bugged somewhere along the way. I'd never mentioned the word "Nobody" in my call to him, but knowing only the area I was interested in and the fact that no known registered mage was there might have piqued somebody's interest in the possibility of a rogue mage, who might be recruitable for some sort of internal power play. If something like that was going on, they would have to use conditional terms to contact him, even if they had no idea he might be a Nobody. They might even be using conditional terms as a sieve... if, say, it was an innocent passing mage, they might see the message but couldn't receive it, but if one of the terms was 'somebody who has a grudge against this particular member of the Council' or something, the one who sent the message knows that only someone already primed for an offer is likely to see it. A lot of shady business gets set up that way, with conditional terms on semi-public messages. Or, there was always the possibility that it wasn't anybody I told at all... that a mage I didn't even know was in the game was successfully monitoring my movements, looking for a wedge to drive in for some kind of attack. "It's definitely a concern, though. We should probably stop looking at it." If it was designed to look like it's always been here, staring at it made us stand out.

"Stop looking at what?" My heart leapt, and I think I probably jumped a little as well. I didn't even have to look to know it was my sister, even though she sounded different, a little out of breath, like she'd seen us from a distance and jogged here. I turned my head in her direction, trying to channel my genuine usual happiness at seeing her into a smile that covered up my discomfort with the circumstances.

"Alyssa!" Haley looked at her phone. "Shit, did I miss our lunch?" They were having lunch. Haley was here less than a week and was already hanging out with my sister regularly enough to have lunch plans.

Allie waved a hand like it was no big deal. "No, you're good... my Prof let class out twenty minutes early because he had an appointment. I just spotted you and.... Oh, I hope I'm not interrupting. I just didn't realize you two knew each other." A smile was pasted on her face, but something in the set of her eyes read as a little worried, maybe suspicious, though she was trying not to let it show. I knew that face in a way others didn't, of course, and she no longer had the same benefit of me, so I hoped my poker face held.

Haley was smooth with a quick answer. "Oh, yeah, we go to the same gym." Gym's often a good alibi if mages need to account for time they were doing something they can't talk about, because so many of us take shortcuts to fitness... and it worked for this as well. "I mean, obviously Galahad's much more dedicated to it than I am."

Allie's brow furrowed. "Galahad?"

That was less smooth, but she recovered quickly. "Little nickname. Some creeper was hassling me, and he helped scare the guy off. He was super wholesome about it, too, wouldn't even let me buy him a coffee to thank him, and ran off before I even got to offer spankings and oral sex." Allie drew back, just a little, blinking rapidly like she'd just been lightly slapped, not enough to do serious damage, but enough that she wasn't sure what caused it or what to do about it. "That's a joke. But I appreciated he didn't seem to be doing it to hit on me himself, you know? So when I found out he was auditing here too, I suggested we be audit buddies." We'd agreed not to use magic to insert ourselves into the student base officially, so Haley's cover was that she just moved here and was taking a set of online classes to set herself up to transfer officially next semester, but learned better from actual lectures. Mine was still that I was casually auditing while 'thinking about' going back to school.

It would have been fine for anyone who didn't know both of us. Maybe it even would have worked if we'd only encountered Allie separately... but with her already suspicious of me, I could see the gears turning in her head about how suspicious the coincidence was, two of us with similar stories also knowing each other. I wouldn't have been surprised if she already suspected Haley was working with me... or, perhaps, that I'd set up coming to her rescue as a way to get close to Haley as part of my unexplained PI business. If she hadn't thought of these ideas already, she probably would soon, so I finally found my voice, in the hopes of distracting her. "We were just looking at that. Wondering what it says. My Greek's pretty rusty." As in pretty well non-existent, aside from a few food terms, the occasional loan word in the magical lexicon, and some dimly-remembered stuff that I learned as root-words of medical terminology. None of that involved reading them in a non-English alphabet anyway.

She followed my gaze and head-jerk to the wall. "Huh. That's new." Haley and I locked eyes, just for a moment, but it seemed to have done the trick of temporarily diverting any outward suspicion. "I'm pretty sure that's not actually Greek. Might be a code? Wouldn't be surprised if it's some of the CompSci nerds doing a prank. Though now that I think about it, aside from the vandalism angle, something like that would be a cool stunt for the Tabletop Club to do, you know, drum up interest." She snorted. "Maybe somebody went rogue."

"Yeah, maybe," Haley agreed, giving me another look, then asking pleasantly, "But since you love puzzles so much, you got any idea what it says?" Was she trying to bait her to see if she fit the terms of the message? Haley should know the glyphs didn't--themselves--convey any meaning.

Allie didn't get close enough to trigger it, even if she could have met the conditions, but that didn't mean her curiosity wasn't piqued. "Not off hand, but..." She took out her phone, snapped a picture. "Might be fun to try and solve. Maybe there's a prize, being first."

Decoding a set of magical glyphs is a fool's errand, but I had to hope it would keep my sister distracted from the puzzle of me and Haley for a while. I was going to have to decide how to get in front of that before she asked, but right then, I was juggling too many other puzzles to properly find an answer. What was going on with the harvesters? Who was sending a message to a Nobody? Was he actually forming a cult? Was there a leak or some Council powerplay going on? Finding the answers to those might be vital, but as always, my most pressing concerns involved my sister, and I was still reeling from the implications I'd just discovered there. Haley specifically said that the message was designed to look like it had always been there, to people who weren't in the magical life. Allie wasn't... probably. The fact that she was able to find me on Google should have settled that question. Yet she clearly thought the message was new, which meant... something. I just wasn't sure what, yet. And, as if that wasn't enough, I had to figure out how and why Haley had already zeroed in on Allie--and worry about the fact that, thanks to today, she knew that we knew each other, too. Once we were alone again, there were certainly going to be questions from her about that. I could only hope I was able to come up with some good answers by then.

With all that, sometimes I wish I only had an unsolvable cipher to deal with.

Chapter 13

After my initial panic, I realized there was a plausible solution to one problem. Maybe two. Wardens have a natural resistance to memory magics... it's not part of my magical pact with Gnarly, it's what caused Liz to recruit me in the first place. Just a natural, random talent... and one my sister might also possess. It's not like I ever used magic to try and mess with her mind. Maybe, in another world, she was recruited instead of me. Probably she'd have made better choices all around.

Still, that was an explanation for her seeing that message and not, like everybody else, dismissing it as something that had always been there and thus unworthy of notice. A broadly targeted 'this isn't new' effect is exactly the kind of thing that even people who don't have a strong enough resistance to ever become Wardens might resist. It didn't necesssarily mean she was in the magical life, or even could become a full Warden. I only hoped I could convince Haley of the same thing.

I wasn't going to be able to do that with Allie there... nor did I really want to send her away, so I had to put it on hold. I just stood there, maybe a little hunched over, feeling shy and awkward around my own sister, a rare experience, but she didn't know she was my sister, given how we left things I wasn't sure how I was supposed to be acting. Should I politely excuse myself? Yet I also didn't want to leave her entirely alone with Haley, at least until I had a chance to give my explanation.

Haley must have been thinking the opposite. "Anyway, I did skip breakfast to catch an early lecture, so if you want to grab lunch a little early, that works for me."

"Sounds good. You want to join us, Cal?"

"Yeah, Cal," Haley said, repeating my name with a trace of amusement, since she assumed I'd chosen a fake name that was shortened in the same way my Warden district was. "You must be hungry."

"A little." Though I'd started to not notice it as much, with my taste-buds out of commission. I still had a few days left of bland, not-tasting anything life ahead of me. Maybe I should take advantage of it, get a kale smoothie or something healthy but that made my tongue want to shrivel up. "You don't mind?" I asked, looking at Allie, giving her one more chance to back out if she was only offering to be polite.

It seemed like a genuine offer, she had an ease casualness to her whole demeanour that suggested she wasn't bothered by me and my secrets, at least right now. "Sure. It's just lunch. And we've all got something in common."

"We do?"

"We like to play games."

Maybe she was a little bothered still... or at least, that seemed like a subtle jab at me, and my deceptions, but then it hit me it might be something else instead... or as well. "Oh, is that how you two know each other?"

"Yeah." Haley answered. "The main reason I wanted to go to an in-person school is the social aspect, so the first thing I did when I decided to transfer here was hit up the interesting clubs, see if I liked the vibes. So far the TableTop group's been the most welcoming. Even if they didn't have Wingspan."

I should have known. Magic tends to attract geeks. Either because they specifically seek out magic, never giving up on the idea it's real, or just because when they stumble upon something they don't rationalize it away because it speaks to a secret yearning they've had all along. So I shouldn't have been surprised that the geekier clubs were also some of Haley's first stops to insinuate herself into campus life, either for her own comfort or just to see if the Nobody might be there. And at one of them, she seemed to have hit it off with my sister. All perfectly logical, in retrospect.

Allie grinned. "Hey, like I said, bring it in yourself, I'm sure it'd be a big hit with the regulars. I'd love to try it."

"Maybe Cal could play too. Since I didn't know we shared so many interests."

"Yeah, maybe," Allie said. She wasn't lying, exactly, but she was saying it in the same way she'd say,'Yeah, maybe' to a party she really didn't want to go to, but didn't want to let the other person know. So I wasn't totally off her shitlist. Or it could be she just didn't think I'd be sticking around campus long enough to get invested in. Though I remembered her telling me, The Club room's for students only. as a way to shut me down, and apparently she wasn't as strict as that with Haley, so that probably meant something. In fairness, she didn't know Haley was pretending to be something she wasn't. It was starting to feel like she might even regret the lunch offer, now, like she'd just realized her charity was coming back to bite her now that it also included an invitation that she was inclined to refuse but wasn't ready to explain why. I wondered if I should tell her Haley was a part of my job. Not out of spite, but just because I owed her whatever honesty I could. "Anyway, I just gotta run by my locker and drop some things off..."

"Great," Haley said. "We'll go save a table. We'll try by the Starbucks, there's a quiet corner there I like."

That slight, ineffable look of stress or worry deepened, just a little, maybe imperceptible given her resting waif face except to people who knew her well, those intimate enough to notice her lips turning into the faintest pout just for a moment, before forcibly reasserting itself into a half smile. I suspected she was expecting to send me off to save a table while she asked Haley about me in private, but that plan didn't work if Haley had a specific spot in mind. Or maybe my sister was just disappointed we didn't offer to go with her.

I'd have offered, if I was confident it would be welcome. Instead I just stood there while she said, "Sure, that works. I'll only be a few minutes."

"I'll text you if we need to find a different spot."

Allie nodded and started off, looking back over her shoulder at us after a moment, and then we turned and started moving in the general direction of the Starbucks. "Well, that was interesting," she said. "You've been here... what, a week longer than me? And somehow we've met the same people."

"It's not that unexpected," I tried to protest. "Mages are often geeks. It's only natural we're going to start looking in geek spaces, and thus, run into the same people."

"Mmm," she said, like she was weighing it over and finding the explanation far less satisfying than I had. She pulled out her phone and started tapping casually on it. "It's more than that, though. She doesn't seem like somebody who just met you. Talk about vibes, the ones you two give off are intense. And you looked squirrely when she interrupted us." A little more tapping on her screen before she looked at me. "So clearly you two have some kind of connection you're not letting on about. And that's fine, none of my business, but what I do need to know is... are you the reason for the weirdness around her?"

"Weirdness?" I asked. "What weirdness?"

"It's what attracted me to her. In an investigative sense, I mean. I mean, she is attractive but I don't get involved on the job, and..." She paused for a moment as her phone let off a soft ding and she read whatever message was there. "I can tell she's into you anyway."

I didn't want to talk about this. "You were saying there's something weird?"

"Yeah. I don't know exactly what it means but, there's just something... off about her, cosmically speaking. There's a certain... well, vibe..." She gave a smile as though conscious she'd been using that word a lot. "...that I can sense from active spells, if I'm close-up, especially vulgar stuff, where it's disturbing the natural order and flow of the universe as we understand it." She finished tapping one last message in and then pocketed her phone, like she was not expecting a reply. "Usually it fades very quickly once the spell's completed, but occasionally, there's something that lingers. Like the hands of the Others gripped it with a firm enough hand that it left indentations... not something you can see with the naked eye, but if you're paying attention, you can feel it's not as... smooth as it should be. That's the sense I get from her."

"You don't think she's...?" .

"She's not the Nobody if that's what you're asking." I was going to say a mage, actually. "I don't think I actually could sense a Nobody this way. I mean, I've never tried, as far as I'm aware, but I can't even sense an ordinary mage if they're not drawing on their extradimensional connections to influence the world. I don't think she's one of those either, by the way." I relaxed. "When you build a connection with the Others, it's like paving a road. There's care taken, and after, not a lot leaves an impression for very long. But ordinary people, if you're good, and the spell's vulgar enough, you can sometimes find marks from days or weeks earlier. And I can't say for sure if her road is paved, all I know is there's a big footprint, like somebody stomped on her life. Or maybe put up magical scaffolding I can still see the traces of. I know I'm sort of jumping back and forth between metaphors here, but we're dealing with concepts the human brain isn't built for. All I know for sure is some kind of magic left a big mark on her. Not a lot of people could sense it, but I can." She caught my eye, maybe noticed something in my look, and clarified. "It doesn't necessarily mean anything big. I mean it's not like she's the fucking Chosen One, stuffed full of midicholorians or anything. Lots of people have the fingerprints of the Gods on them if I really inspect them, but, really, it's like the two mouse problem again. We're hunting a mage, so you look where you see droppings. My working theory, before I knew she knew you, was that she could be from the Nobody's past life and his erasure left a hole in her, too. That would explain him lurking around... or there's, Option B, that he's just been working magic on her since he started operating here. Option C is it's nothing to do with him at all, and there's some other mage in her life. I won't know until I look more into her. It's kind of the whole reason I befriended her. But if it's your fault, then I know not to spend much time on it."

Right. She was somehow detecting the remnants of the magic that stitched her into a new life here. I didn't know that was possible... Haley was far better than advertised, apparently. "Then you should just drop it," I said. "It's unrelated. It's something I was looking into before I detected the Nobody."

"Why? What's so special about her?"

"I'd rather not talk about it."

"You know, if I have reason to stop thinking you as Galahad, I'm willing to pay the price of tearing the geas off so I can walk away. Any amount of pain is worth not having to deal with creepers. So you haven't been fucking around with her in ways you shouldn't, have you?"

"No!" If I had, her geas had an escape clause anyway that would fit. "Yes, she was affected by a big spell in the last few weeks. But she wasn't the target. I know the spell, and it wasn't related to the Nobody."

She gave me an appraising look. "I think I believe you. At least that you think you know what's up with her. And that you think you've got a good reason not to tell me. But the more you tell me, the better position we're in... whatever happened, if I know maybe I can account for it and see if there's anything else going on. Come on dude, I can tell she's important to you. So are you sure you don't want to tell me the whole story? I'm geased to keep anything you tell me confidential, remember."

But geases, as she'd just reminded me, could be broken, and I still didn't want anyone to know about Allie at all, much less that she was my sister. That cat was partly out of the bag, but not completely... if I could find a way to get Haley to stop digging, maybe it wouldn't go beyond her. I didn't know the full scope of Haley's abilities, but I thought I could give her a shard of the truth that might satisfy her. "She's a Warden-candidate, resistant to mind altering magic. She was affected as collateral damage from another spell, despite that."

"Huh. That would make sense. If she's an Ironmind..." I had heard the term a few times before, but it wasn't in common currency here. "...then even if the Others gave her brain an intense scrub for some reason, the memories couldn't be erased, only suppressed. I mean, that's true of everyone, probably. Some say no information can ever be truly destroyed, and if the Others can restore memories, they must still exist, in some sense. But with Ironminds I bet it's harder to sever all ties, and the process would probably leave behind something my techniques could sense. Scaffolding, until the mind stops trying."

"You know any way the scaffolding could be torn down?" I asked, the hope escaping despite myself.

"And restore the original memories... without directly invoking the Others, I assume?" I nodded. "Only the usual rumors--strong emotional connection, familiar associations--that you hear for anyone with memory tweaks, Ironmind or not, but all that depends on how thorough the spell was. If the Others did it without being explicitly told..." She left the thought dangling, her face showcasing her doubt that simple tricks would work when god-like beings, in their infinite wisdom, decided something was a necessary step in a greater plan. As strange as it sounded, if wiping a mind was a mages direct intention, it might be done sloppily, the patron absent-mindedly granting a frequent demand from a whiny pet... but if it was 'collateral damage' like I told her--a step they thought was necessary to grant a more complicated wish--then the effect was likely to have some attention put into it, and would be as thorough as they needed it to be. And if Harley knew it was specifically a price Gnarly asked for, she'd probably think the chances were even grimmer. However, her eyes suddenly lit up with hope, or at least less doubt. "Still, if she's an Ironmind, it's gotta be easier, right? Is that something you want to do? Get at those memories?" Maybe the challenge appealed to her.

The potential of having an expert appealed to me, enough to give a little more. I told myself there were tons of plausible reasons a Warden might want to be able to get at a memory thought to be gone. "If you could, it might be worth a second favor."

"Tempting. But this isn't related to the current job?" I shook my head. "I've never directly worked with memory restoration, so I'm afraid it's a little out of my area. And since it's not part of the current assignment, the geasa between us prevents me from actively casting the kind of investigation spells I might need... or getting her consent for some of them, which would really help." Normally I'm all about consent but it wasn't like we could explain to Allie what we wanted to do... but the bigger problem was kind of that geas. While she worked for me, she wasn't allowed to use actual spells on campus--or on people from campus--unless it was related to searching for the Nobody, or she felt her safety was in danger. Even if it was part of the job, I had to sign off on certain types of spells that a nearby mage might detect. "At best, maybe I could probe around the scaffolding, open negotiations on a few possible attack vectors without completing the deal... see if the Others let something slip in the grammar."

'Attack vectors' sounded good, even if I wasn't entirely sure what she meant by all of it or what grammar she was piecing out of the wordless communion we had with out patrons... she'd talked before about seeing patterns in the incantations, but those only came into my head once a bargain was actually struck, as the spell was being cast. Though maybe her relationship with her patron worked differently than mine. Still, as hopeful as this was, I couldn't let myself take my eye off the ball. "Focus on finding the Nobody first. Afterwards, I'd be grateful for any insights." My sister'd be in no danger then. Maybe I could even find a way to explain to her what I wanted to do.

"Gotcha." As we reached the door of the food court area, she stopped, hand on the door. "Hey, Galahad... are you sure this isn't related to the current job?"

The tone of her voice made it hard to tell whether that was a question she was still suspicious about or an offer. It could be she just didn't believe me and wanted me to convince her. Or, maybe she was offering me a loophole. If I told her it was part of the job, then she could pursue it in ways the geas currently prevented. If it was unrelated--or at least, if I told her it was--I could tell her to cast the spells anyway. That's what I decided it was, in the end, an offer for my benefit, and I wasn't entirely wrong. Maybe I should have taken Haley up on it, but instead, I just said, "I'm sure."

"Suit yourself." We went inside, and Haley found the spot she was looking for. I waited till she got her coffee at Starbucks, which made me wonder if she'd lost her sense of taste as well considering there was a more indie coffee place on the other side of the hall. She also picked up something at a Panda Express that made me resent my own loss of taste because it looked delicious but I know would only taste like ashes to me. So I got some kind of vile-sounding health drink from an overpriced juice bar and from a nearby sandwich shop got a BLT because it was at least crunchy and I could load it up with hot sauce.

When Allie joined us, a few minutes later, I was in the process of putting on my third packet of the stuff they gave out. "You know, I've got some pepper spray on my keychain if that's not enough for you," she joked, and I looked up and smiled weakly.

Something was different, nagging at me because even though I could tell it was there, it was small enough that I wasn't sure I wasn't just imagining it... or maybe Haley was right about vibes you could sense, and this was how my brain was interpreting some kind of magical effect on her... but within a few seconds I realized it was much simpler than that... her bare arms were visible. At her locker she must have taken over the light unbuttoned shirt she'd had on earlier and just left the sleeveless top underneath. Possibly other minor cosmetic changes too, like she'd adjusted her hair or put on some kind of chapstick or something, because she looked a little less chaotic than when she'd first come running up to us. Right now, she carried a to-go bowl full of salad, loaded with bits of chicken, and sat down at the open space at the table. She continued her thought with, "Seems a bit like overkill to me though."

Maybe I was laying it on a bit thick, but so was my sister. I knew Allie's spice tolerance level, and she was no stranger to sriracha as a condiment, in small doses anyway, and these packets weren't much stronger than that.

"I guess some people love the pain," Haley pointed out locking one eye with me. She probably thought I was either getting ready to perform magic, or maybe wondered if I'd simply developed a taste for hot stuff from a long history of previous spells. If she really could sense spells-in-progress, she'd soon know it wasn't the first one. "Personally, I feel bad for whoever has to kiss him. Between the beard and the burn you might just be a masochist."

"I don't know," Allie said, almost philosophically. "It might be worth the pain. Barely. And the beard isn't so bad, really."

"Wait..." Haley's eyes widened and I felt a little like I was going to die. "Well now I just feel dumb, Here I was thinking you'd make a good couple, and maybe I could help that along..." Was that what she was doing? "I had no idea you two were already..."

"It's not like that." Allie shook her head and waved her hands--and fork with a piece of lettuce speared on it-- as she said it. "Just one kiss. Right now we're trying the friends thing."

"Ah, so I take it the kiss test did not go well?"

I still couldn't speak, but I thought Allie might have been giving me space to before she said, "No, we're just not in the right place for a relationship... right now. So..." She left the sentence trailing, like she wasn't sure how to finish. Finally she said, "Yeah. Trust me, the beard's not a dealbreaker." As much as what she wanted filled me with knots in my stomach I couldn't fully ungnarl, I couldn't help but feel a little excited at the way she put it. Right now she'd said. So she hadn't definitively closed the book on a relationship, and that gave me hope. Not because I thought our relationship would or should ever go there, but maybe it meant she'd truly decided to look past my earlier deceptions and the fictional-sounding sister I couldn't explain, and give me a second chance to be near her... as a friend.

Of course, I'd soon have to face risking that chance, to explain Haley--or not explain, and risk her putting it together another way--but it felt good to have it, that she still trusted me.

I probably should have responded, but instead, I just took a bite of my sandwich. "I think we're making Cal uncomfortable," Haley pointed out, though not as sympathetically as one might hope. It was more in the vein of a friend discovering something they could tease you with and make you even more uncomfortable. And considering Haley wasn't exactly a friend, it was a lot more unsettling.

"Probably," Allie agreed, and then took advantage of my mouth full of flames to continue. "He's a very closed off person, have you noticed yet? Friendly, sure, but more comfortable being the observer than the observed. You know, I practically had to drag him over to play games with us when I saw him lurking around the TableTop Club."

"Ah, is that how you met?" Haley asked.

"That's not exactly how it happened.," I said, finally able to say something once I'd swallowed my bite. I took a sip of smoothie to calm the burn... and then another bite, so I wouldn't have to elaborate.

Haley ignored me entirely. "I bet you went in for the kiss, too."

A shrug and a smile that said everything even if she didn't follow it up with, "Hey, Carpe Diem."

"You two do look like you'd make a good couple though," Haley emphasized. "You've got a natural chemistry going. Almost like you've already known each other years. Maybe you were together in a past life or something. You even look a little alike, you know?" At least if I was getting red, I could blame it on the spice.

"Well, I can't say I really believe in past lives..." Allie said.

"Really? You never felt like you've been drawn to someone for no logical reason? Like fate was pushing you towards them?"

"I think everyone's felt like that at some point. But that doesn't mean there's anything supernatural going on. People are really good at rationalizing. Sorry, no offence if you believe in stuff like destiny, it's just never made sense to me. The truth is, anyone you meet, if you really dig, you can find a hundred strange coincidences that could be mistaken for fate, like you both went to the same school or your grandfather saved their grandfather's life or something, or, like Cal and I both being part Hungarian. It's a mistake to confuse that for the hand of the supernatural. There's less than six degrees of separation between any two random people in this life... adding past lives would just be ridiculous. But when you get right down to it, when I'm drawn to someone, it's always because I see something I like about them. Or, occasionally just hormones... but that boils down to the same thing, really."

"So which was it with Cal? That drew you to him? Was it that whole closed-off, man-of-mystery vibe?"

She looked me in the eyes, and the a crooked smile formed. "Well, I do like a good puzzle. But honestly, at first it was pity, he just seemed so lost there, waiting. And probably a little bit of hormones too, because he is an attractive man. And, as we got to talking, he didn't seem quite so guarded, it was just... easy, you know? Maybe that's just the way he is with everyone, though. Charming, but you run into a wall once you try to get too close. I don't know. I bet it helps with..." She stopped herself, deciding not to blow my cover, I suppose. "The truth is, I really don't know him well yet. I hope there's someone in there worth getting to know, but... well, we'll see, right?" Her eyes stayed on me as she said that, and I thought--hoped--that it was another deliberate signal, telling me she'd decided to believe me. Or at least give me a chance. Much like I was trying to take the invitation to lunch in the first place.

"Yeah, I don't buy it," Haley decided after a moment. "I mean I don't think you're lying, I just think there's something deeper going on, and I'm not ready to abandon my theories yet." With Haley, I didn't have to try and interpret... it was obvious what she was doing. The same kind of thing I was when I started talking to Allie. Questions and little leading statements that might spark a connection to a lost memory... maybe with the benefit of whatever abilities she had to feel any reaction to the scaffolding she talked about, like knocking on different spots on the wall and listening for whether it's a stud or a weak spot you might be able to punch through. It might have been an encouraging thought in other circumstances... but when I asked her to probe around Allie's memory block, I didn't mean right while I was there. Almost certainly she was probing my reactions too, trying to piece together our exact relationship, beyond just Warden and Warden-candidate. For all my efforts to misdirect her, I was now sure she'd already pieced together that it was a magical Estrangement, though it seemed like she was still hung up on the idea that this was an ex rather than family. "You sure you didn't have any spicy dreams about someone a lot like Cal before you first met him? Dressed in weird old-fashioned clothes or something?"

A laugh broke out from Allie at that, though her face did redden. "Pretty sure. I mean, I don't really remember my dreams much anymore so I can't say one-hundred-percent, but...."

"What about you, Cal? Any odd dreams about her?"

I tried my best to glare at her while not looking like I was glaring at her, or maybe that I found it annoying that she was talking to me while my mouth was full. That was true too... their lunch choices were the kinds they could take small bites of easily as they talked, to swallow quickly if they needed to say something, but a BLT required a bit more chew.

"See. You two just don't seem like two people who've just met. I mean look at Cal, I don't think I've ever seen him speechless before."

"I'm not speechless," I said, after a notable swallow. But I was running out of sandwich soon, so I'd need a new excuse if I didn't distract the discussion. "I'm eating. While you two are..." I shook my head, unable to finish the thought. "Anyway, can we talk about something else?"

Both of them smirked at me. "Oh, look, there's that wall you were talking about."

"Let's have a little mercy." Allie took out her phone, unlocked it with her free hand and lay it on the table. "So how's the auditing going?"

Haley's eyes flashed with an idea, though the expression faded quickly. I don't think Allie noticed as she was flipping through her phone. "It's weird, cause... like I learn much better from an actual class than online-reading, that's why I want to go here. So we're going over stuff I know I read but... whoosh, it's like I've only retained the smallest bit of it. So it's like I constantly have this feeling like, I know this, I should remember this, You ever have that feeling?"

"Sometimes." It was said distractedly, and if this was another attempt by Haley to trigger memories, it was ill-timed, especially because Allie picked up her phone and tilted it to get a better look at something on it "Huh. That's odd." Her forehead crinkled up in a way that I knew meant she found it not just odd but genuinely puzzling in an unwelcome way. A mystery that interested her far more than Haley's seemingly-casual question. "That graffiti. The cipher or whatever. It's not showing up in my picture."

To Haley and I, though, there was no mystery at all. The message had simply disappeared... and everyone--at least, everyone that had already been magically influenced to believe the message was nothing new and unworthy of notice--would now no longer remember it was ever there at all. Haley and I were exempt from that, and Allie's apparent continued recollection added fuel to the Ironmind theory, but that only protected memories. All other corroborating evidence would have been wiped, which meant that the phone's image could now only show a picture of a bare wall. How could my sister not be doubting herself, when surely she remembered seeing it on the viewfinder.

The change meant one other important thing, though... the message should only have disappeared in one of three scenarios. It would disappear if it was timed to expire in the last few minutes, if the mage casting it had suddenly died... or if the message had been received by the intended target. The last seemed the most likely, and if that was true then the recipient--whether it was the Nobody or some other mage we didn't know about--had just been at that wall, within the past few minutes... and might still be in the area.

Chapter 14

"Maybe it's like a special paint?" Haley suggested. "Like you can see it in person but it doesn't show up on camera?"

It was a nice effort, but my sister was too smart for it and shook her head. "That's not really a thing. Sometimes you can do the reverse, but mostly the camera picks up the same stuff you see, and sometimes more. I mean..." and here she paused, almost certainly thinking of some particularly esoteric way it might work, but then seemed to dismiss it. "No, that would be way too complex. Besides, I'm sure I saw it when I was taking the picture. Didn't I?" Because clearly the evidence on her phone and everything she knew about science suggested she did not.

That's one of the cruel things about magic, its very existence and secrecy gaslights many of the people who encounter it. And those who keep the secret have to help. "I wasn't really paying attention," Haley said, and I gave a shrug like I didn't know enough to know how impossible it was. Which I didn't, really. 'Special paint' seemed plausible enough to me until Allie shot the idea down. But I also knew what did happen and felt like shit keeping it from her. "Listen, I just remembered there's something I need to take care of." If Haley felt the same way I did about it, she was hiding it well... her quick exit, at least, had nothing to do with that, because she met my eye a moment before she said it, wordlessly signalling me that she knew she was now on the job. The Nobody might recognize me if I showed up on the scene, but Haley might be able to lay eyes on him. "I'll be back in like... ten, twenty minutes maybe?"

Allie looked up from her phone. "Oh, no, you don't have to..." Which seemed an odd thing to say... did she think she'd offended Haley somehow?

"No, I do," she insisted as she stood up and began slid by towards the exit. "It won't be long. Ten, fifteen minutes top. If it's any more than that, or you guys need to go, you can dump my noodles."

"Okay, sure..." Allie said, and then looked at me, like she was a bit flustered, like she was prepared to engage with me while there was a buffer of another person, but didn't trust me one-on-one.

Which made what I had to do next even harder. But as the silence dragged on for a few awkward seconds while we regarded each other, I knew it was necessary. Surely, now that she knew we were connected, Allie would Google Haley just to check her suspicions against reality, and I had no idea how that would go. As much as it hurt, as much as it might end the peace we'd formed, I had to be honest with her... at least as much as I felt the situation allowed. I'd already screwed up once in her eyes, and if later she found out what I was about to tell her, she'd never trust me again. On the other hand, if I did tell her, she might still not ever trust me again... but I hoped she'd at least recognize the honesty. So, trusting in a charm I'd prepared to warn me if either of us were under a scrying eye, I took a deep breath and started. "So, I'm just going to get right out in front of this." She tilted her head with vague interest, and I had second thoughts, searching for any other thing I could tell her, but it was no use. "Haley's working with me."

Her face was practically frozen, but she said one word, flat, like she was too stunned to put any emotion into it, to even make it a question. "What." At least it got her mind off the glyphs.

"The case I'm on," I clarified. Which wasn't a lie, as I did consider the Nobody a 'case' in terms of my Warden duties. "I hired her to sort of be my eyes on campus when I'm not here." Now her face was wrinkling in anger and before she shut me down entirely, I rushed to clarify. "I swear, I never told her to go to the TableTop Club, or seek you out or anything like that. I never even mentioned you, because I know you didn't want to be involved in this." The sneer faded into something more sedate, somber even, but hard to read for sure. I thought it meant I had more play to explain. "Believe me, if I thought it was at all likely you'd meet, I'd have told her to just steer clear of you... or be up front, if she couldn't."

"So it's okay to lie to everyone else, as long as it's not me?"

"I don't give a shit about anyone else," I blurted out, then winced at my own vehemence, blinked hard to try and regain my composure. "Look. I'm trying to do a job here. And yeah, the job involves lying sometimes, for a good cause."

"And you still won't tell me what that cause is."

"I wish I could. But there are issues of confidentiality, and I'm not allowed to." I really didn't consider that a lie, either. I was, after all, instructed to keep my magical life from my sister. It was even part of a geas, although that one expired with Liz's death and wasn't explicitly renewed when I took over as Warden. The one about turning any member of my family into a mage remained, I assumed, but making sure I didn't tell Allie was specifically from my mentor, not the Council. But dealing with Nobodys was Council business and I was supposed to keep that confidential wherever possible. It's also implied in the Accords that telling people about the actual existence of magic, when it's not absolutely necessary to maintain a social relationship, isn't allowed at all, although it's usually only punished if it's an attempt on a mass. Other mages may break that rule with a few people in their lives, but as a Warden, I shouldn't, even if it's not a geas... though of course, maybe I was lying to myself, that it wasn't necessary. Still, how was I supposed to explain, at this point, without sounding like a crazy person and at the same time, potentially putting her in the crosshairs? I still hadn't figured it out.

I was also clearly still on thin ice with her. She'd folded her arms over her chest. "So what took you so long?" I looked up at her skeptical face, not quite sure what she was getting at. "If you really wanted to be honest with me, you could have told me this right when we all met up."

"Because it caught me off-guard, okay? And I still wasn't sure how much I wanted to tell her about you." I squeezed my eyes shut again. "You're right, I'm probably too closed off for my own good. And I really don't like when my personal life and my professional life cross wires. So if I had my way, I'd have told Haley the absolute minimum about you, and I guess I was waiting to see how much of that I could still manage. Of course she's probably laughing her ass off right now." Well, not literally at that moment. She seemed too professional for that... she was probably at the site the message was, one finger on her phone like a panic button to invoke the protection geas if she got made, her cover blown somehow. Yet I imagined the moment she had time to reflect, she'd be laughing her ass off about how easily she'd stumbled on the Warden's secret shame... even if she hadn't gotten the whole of it correct. "I'm telling you now."

"You don't get credit for doing the bare minimum, Cal." A soft sigh escaped her lips. "You know, every time I think I might want to trust you..." She left the thought unfinished, but I could read the line behind the line, that she didn't trust me. No matter how much I wanted her to, there were too many secrets I couldn't tell her.

At best, maybe I could be as open as my cover story would allow. "You can talk to Haley, if you want."

"Thanks for the permission."

I winced at the sarcasm. "I just mean, you can verify..." Not everything, certainly. "She shouldn't tell you anything about the case, but... she should be at least be able to tell you that this wasn't an elaborate scheme on my part."

"I mean she's your employee, so... won't she say what you want anyway?"

"More of an independent contractor, really. I don't even know her all that well, and she's got other sources of income. So, sure, she may have her biases, but at the very least, she's a second source to catch me in any potential lies." And I really had tried to avoid any potential lies, although now I'd have to try harder. "And it's all I can really offer at the moment." I let out a breath. "Or, I could just stay away from you, at least until this case is over."

"Do you have any idea when that might be?" she asked, and I had to take that as a good sign, that she hadn't totally written me off, especially when she added, "I'd like the chance to get to know the actual you. If there is one under all this cloak and dagger stuff."

"I wish I knew. Hopefully within a few weeks." Of course, I could either get lucky or make a mistake at any time and force a confrontation earlier... or, spook the Nobody and send him even more underground. In that case, I might never know when Allie was safe. "Kind of depends on what I uncover."

She just watched me for a moment, no longer seeming quite so angry, but I couldn't tell what was going on into her head. "Why didn't you just use me?" Use her? There were a lot of ways I could take that. I was still sorting through them when she clarified. "If you needed someone with their eyes on campus. Instead of hiring somebody else."

Oh. "The way we left things, it didn't seem like you'd be up for it."

"You might be surprised what I'd be up for, if you actually asked. You're investigating something here on campus, and you hired Haley to keep an eye out for something, right? Can't even guess what that's costing you. I figure a PI's case can't be so ultra top secret they can't even ask anyone direct questions, right? But if you've been pumping me for information, you've been pretty indirect about it. So, now that I know why you're here anyway, why not just come out and ask me what you want to know about?" I hesitated, and the flash of annoyance returned. "See, that's the thing, Cal, you want me to trust you, but you won't trust me."

She had a point, but it wasn't quite that simple. "I do trust you, it's just..." The old problem. I couldn't explain everything without spooking her, and if she was spooked, she'd be more in danger. And yet... "The reason I hired Haley was because I could be sure she didn't have any pre-existing relationships that might complicate the investigation. On campus, everyone knows somebody who knows somebody and sooner or later the people I'm looking into realize..." I could tell by her face that she wasn't entirely buying the explanation, even though it was true. And with Allie, I couldn't--wouldn't--even toy with her memory to reduce that risk. I would have to actually trust her.

But of course I did. She was my sister. And I knew her. She wasn't a hypocrite... or, okay, she can be. Everybody can be sometimes. Everybody lies, sometimes. But there are gradations, and, generally speaking, I knew my sister walked the walk. She didn't just demand promises be kept to her and break them at the first opportunity. She'd agonize over breaking a promise even if it was unavoidable. If she invited me to put my trust in her, it was almost as good as a geas. Though it wasn't without risk. I've been taking all these precautions because she knew the Nobody on some level... I'd refrained from asking her specifically out of the fear she might tip him off or go investigate herself and get into trouble. But it seemed like I was at a point where the risk of her pulling away from me was greater, and if he were to try to drag her into whatever cult business might be going on, I wouldn't be able to help... unless, perhaps, I could make her more suspicious of him in the process.

The worst part was, after all that, I knew I'd have to start with a lie. Or at least, a fudging of a truth. Because I knew if I told her outright this guy she knew was a bad guy, she might believe in him over some mystery man who'd already lied to her. But if I left it vague, and couched in doubts of my own, it would invite her to doubt the other way... I can be a manipulative fuck at times. "Okay. I've got a sketch of somebody that's possibly connected to what I'm investigating," I told her, and even though I was about 99% sure he was at the center of things, I hung onto that 1% and stretched it so far I worried it might snap. "I don't know for sure, it's possible he's just some random bystander, but it's a situation where, if he is connected, it's dangerous if he finds out I'm looking into him, you understand?" She nodded, and the skeptical look was gone, she had her waif eyes on me like I was telling her my deepest secrets. "But I do trust you. So all I ask is your word that you won't tell anybody I was asking. If you know him and don't feel comfortable telling me anything, that's fine, I respect that, but if this goes bad and my investigation is blown, somebody I care a lot about is in danger. That's why I'm being so careful, why I haven't been asking typical PI questions."

"I swear, Cal." She reached out and put her hand on mine. To look in her eyes, you'd think she trusted me completely now, which was a huge turnaround from just minutes ago. Maybe trust really did earn trust.

I took a deep breath, not entirely ready to face the critical moment, but I'd already lit the fuse, it was going to be hard to defuse the bomb without losing all that trust even more quickly than I built it, I handed her a folded-over piece of paper, the magically generated sketch of someone I knew she knew. And she possibly knew I knew this as well... at least if she remembered me asking about him on the night I reintroduced myself to her. She might decide I'd lied to her with my earlier assurance that I wasn't hired to look into her or her friends. Though from what she'd said at the time he wasn't really in that category, so I could still claim a technical out from that one.

She unfolded the paper, and I could see the tell, the slight widening of the eyes that signalled recognition. I could also see she was trying not to give anything else away, not until she learned more. "And what happens if you find this guy?"

"Nothing right away. I do some more looking into him, from a distance. Maybe a little light tailing, just to see who else he associates with on a regular basis, in case one of them is my real target." And given some of the stuff that Haley discovered, it was possible that, even if he was a Nobody, there was more going on here than just him... I'd already had to abandon my hope that this could be over the night I found where he was based. He might not even be the biggest threat at play here. "My focus then becomes trying to find some evidence that either confirms him or rules him out. If he's not a part of this, then, ideally, he never knows I was even investigating him. If he is... that's for the Law to handle." Of course, in this case, I was the Law that would handle it... possibly invested with some extra resources from the Council.

"Okay," she decided in a snap. "I know him... but you already know that, right?" So she did remember my asking about him. I gave a tilt of my head acknowledging the point. "His name's Tom..." Finally, a name! "...Or Tim? Terry? I'm pretty sure starts with a T." Okay, an initial at least. More than I had before, assuming she wasn't throwing me off the trail. "We met the first week and I was already juggling so many names, you know? I was just too embarrassed to admit I didn't remember so ever since I just sort of avoided ever calling him by name." It shouldn't have been surprising that she remembered meeting him before the meteor... that was true of all her friends, but such a tenuous link to a Nobody being preserved when her life got rewritten really did suggest there was some one-sided connection where he was focused on her. Again, assuming she was being honest, but I wasn't getting any signs of deception. "So, yeah, I can't say I know him very well, but he's in a few of my classes, and sometimes we talk a little bit about assignments or whatever, or say hello when we cross paths. I honestly can't see how he's who you're looking for. He's,.. I mean, you know the type. Friendly but awkward? Like for months I thought maybe he was just working up the nerve to ask for my number, and every time he just chickened out and made small-talk instead. So I really don't think he's some kind of criminal mastermind."

"I never said he was a mastermind," I pointed out. "Do you know where he lives?"

"Generally? We talked about it once,, but... again, first week, so all I remember was it was one of the buildings near me." If it was pre-Severance, that vagueness of memory could have been just as much Gnarly's fault as a Nobody's. Or a perfectly legitimate failure to remember a detail that's not very important to you. There was also always the chance that they did talk more, but he was wiping her memory, gathering up intel without her knowing. Even if her memory was harder to tamper with than an ordinary person, that didn't mean it was impossible, and I didn't yet know the extent of her natural resistance or the abilities of the presumed Nobody or his patron. "But if you want to find him, there's an obvious path, right? If you were to go to my classes, sooner or later you'd spot him."

"I had no intention of using you like that." I'd avoided even staking out Allie's classes specifically because I didn't want to risk her spotting me and thinking I was stalking her... though I was planning to ask Haley to audit some of her classes before I knew she and my sister had already met. "I hope you believe that."

"And what if I invited you to use me?" she asked, to my amazement. How did we go from her distrusting me and potentially even deciding she never wanted to see me again to offering to help me so fast? Even I thought my private eye story sounded dubious. "My next class with him is on Tuesday. I can even introduce you to him, if you want."

"I'd rather not stand out in his attention at all." If I hadn't already been noticed by him, it was just stupid, and if I had, confirming we were close was the worst move. "But if you truly don't mind, maybe I could just find a spot outside where I can casually lurk and see everyone as they come out, without being seen at all."

"I'm not sure there is such a spot there. The building's got a few different exits and people kind of scatter depending on where they need to go next. I mean, there is a bench right outside the door that you can sit at. You'll at least see most people that way... but it's the last class of the afternoon there so there's not really much reason for anyone to be waiting there unless they know somebody." That impressed me, filled me with a little sibling pride... she had good instincts and observational awareness. I suspected she would probably make a good PI, or a Warden, for that matter. At least, I thought that until I saw the smirk played at the corner of her lips, and what she said next that made me think she wasn't taking it particularly seriously. "Of course, you could act like you're there to see me. Pretend to be my boyfriend, picking me up." She saw something in my face, said, "Just pretend. Though you have my permission to kiss me if you think he's on you to watching him."

"No," I said firmly, trying not to think about that. "That's not a good idea." Well, from a tailing standpoint, it was a tactic that had some limited merit, but for the same reasons I didn't want her to introduce us--and a few others--I wasn't willing to go there. "Maybe Haley could meet you." Odds are he wouldn't clock her as being connected to me.

"Okay but she's not going to be as much fun to kiss for distraction."

Clearly trying to make me crack a smile, and if it wasn't life and death for the only person I cared about, I might have... but I had to impress on her that this wasn't a game. "I'm serious, Allie. I don't want to risk this if I think it's going to put you in any danger... and if he is interested in you, even thinking you might have a serious boyfriend might trigger him to do something." Maybe this might scare her, especially since I knew I couldn't afford to explain more than that, but if she thought he was some kind of serial killer and started keeping a distance, it might be for the best anyway. Still, the second thoughts were starting to get the best of me. "Maybe this is a bad idea entirely. I can do it the slow way, wait outside the building at the busiest exit, hope I get lucky. If I don't, I'll try another one next time. Safer that way."

"Oh, come on, Cal. Look, if this guy's secretly some kind of dangerous scumbag, better he's dealt with fast, right? And if he's not--and like I said, I think you've got the wrong guy--then the sooner you find that out, the sooner you can go back to being a normal person instead of worrying about protecting me." I shouldn't have been surprised that she'd hit on that as my primary motivation, I guess--and possibly blamed that for the reason I was so sketchy around her--but it still struck me how she was now so willing to help me when she was so suspicious of me before. Maybe her heart had some muscle memory for instinctive trust in me. Or it was just as likely she'd sensed something subtly off about him--my sister had always had good instincts--but Haley had gotten my hopes up again. I liked that word she'd used, scaffolding as though we could knock it down and underneath I'd have my sister back again. "Have Haley meet me at the Tuesday afternoon class," she suggested, demonstrating again how she'd make a good PI when she added, "She can tell you the way he's going. Then you can pick up the trail on the way out."

Assuming he didn't teleport or use other obfuscations, it was a good plan. And if he did use magic like that, Haley might be able to sense something interesting. "Okay. If you're sure."

"I will want to talk to her first, though, hear her side of this." I'd expected that, and tried to work out exactly what I was going to say to her. "Where do you think she is, anyway?"

Well, I'd already let her in a little, no sense making something up now. "There's a chance she's following him right now and all of this is moot."

That answer surprised her, and she leaned forward, looking around as though everything was going down in the cafeteria. "Wait, really?"

I looked around too, just in case, but nobody seemed to be taking any extraordinary interest in us. As for Haley, she'd been gone long enough to get to the glyph site, at least, and if she saw someone, it was possible she was tailing them. Still... "Probably not, if she hasn't texted me by now, but yeah. There was a potential lead she had to check out." She still seemed thrown off, and I couldn't resist the teasing impulse, especially if it prevented me from having to explain. "What, you think I've just been sitting on my ass hoping for your help?"

Sadly, she didn't seem especially teased. "No, just... she offered to duck out and give us alone time. I thought that was what she was doing. But I guess that's part of the PI game, right? Setting up your excuses in advance?"

"It can be a useful habit," I said, although I knew it wasn't the case here, since she had no way of knowing the glyphs were going to disappear so fast. Might as well admit my uncertainty, though, as long as I was being honest. "But I have no idea what she was thinking. It's not like she cleared it with me, and she must have texted you while we were together." At least, there was no time that she and Haley were alone since we all found out we knew each other, so it must have happened while we were talking on our way to grab a table... or maybe when we split up to get our orders. A part of me wondered exactly what they'd said to each other, and whether Haley truly offered on her own, or if maybe Allie was the one who asked, to provide herself an excuse to talk to me without seeming too forward, like she was ready to forgive me, and Haley just played along. No, that was probably too much to hope for.

"What about that story about you scaring off creepers at a gym? Is that how you met?"

"We met at a beach, actually. No creepers that I saw."

I hoped she wasn't going to take me to task for deceiving her by not contradicting the story right away, but she didn't. "So why does she call you Galahad then?"

"It's really a less interesting story than you'd think. We have a mutual friend... Haley said something that sounded a bit too critical, and got my hackles up." I shrugged, not hiding my embarrassment at the moniker. "I'm still trying to get a handle on her sense of humor. We only actually met this week." Yet I was going to have to trust her, with a lot. Not just with knowing about Allie, but also with knowing what to say to her. During our negotiations, we had discussed a fallback, where if there was somebody we needed to bring in that didn't know about magic, we'd revert to the PI story, with strict rules about what she was supposed to reveal... setting up your excuses in advance really was a good skill to have, whether a PI or a mage working undercover. Still, as much as the geas would help her out, there were always going to be gray areas, and I had not real idea how well Haley might cope with them. When I pulled out my phone I knew I was taking a risk, but I'd decided it had been long enough that asking for an update from Haley wasn't being too much of an annoying boss, and tapped out a message for her. "How're things going?" I wrote, and then, before I could get a reply, started typing out another line, getting momentarily flustered when I started with 'My sister' and had to correct it. "Our mutual friend knows about my job, btw, and I trust her, so please be open with her about anything that doesn't violate NDA rules." The phones were supposed to be scry-proofed (at least without direct access to a cell tower), but one never knew for certain what magic was at play, and if things really went bad Haley might have been caught and her phone visually inspected, so, I waited until I got an 'alls well' codephrase in response before sending the second part of the message. There was still code in what I texted her... particularly the reference to NDA was intended to signal magic was off limits. No Dark Arts, maybe, if I was clever enough to think of it in advance. I showed it to Allie, uncertain if the code made it count as a lie when I was trying to convince her I was doing just the opposite, being open. Probably. There were so many lies of omission, of implication, that I had to compromise on, because I knew I still couldn't let her as close as I wanted.

Haley responded with a thumbs-up symbol, then words to the effect of there being nobody standing out where she was, followed by an offer to stay scarce if I wanted more alone time, followed by an emoji of a pair of kissy lips. I didn't show that to Allie, just sent one last message saying she could return any time. Even if Haley didn't stand out, it was probably best not to make the same mistake we'd hope the message recipient did, and linger there suspiciously. "I think she's on her way back."

"So the lead didn't pan out?"

"Probably not. In this job, most leads don't." I've investigated so many things from the tipline that were either unverifiable or straight up one mage reporting another as a minor grudge. "You still gotta try and follow them."

"Until you find the one that does," Allie finished. "Like a relationship, I guess. You don't try, you might miss out on something important and never know."

I made a noncommittal noise and went back to eating, because honestly, I wasn't sure what to say to that. It was obvious to me we couldn't really have a relationship--not one like it seemed like she might have been hinting could still be in the cards--once I was off the case, but I also didn't want to entirely rule it out and push her away. As long as we were getting along, there seemed to be low risk of her tipping off my quarry, not if she'd volunteered to help. It was too good an opportunity to ruin just to avoid being uncomfortable about my sister seeing me as a romantic partner. Maybe there was more to it, too, if I have to be honest... there was something about her interest that felt... good. Exciting, even. But it's not what I told myself. I thought, if I kept that door open, then I was close to getting everything I wanted... she and Haley could work together to help me trace the Nobody to where I could take him out safely... and, perhaps, during their time together, Haley could find a way break down my sister's memory alterations. As long as she didn't hold a grudge against Haley for the cover story, like she had me.

When Haley finally joined us, there didn't seem to be much sign of that. She just sat down back at her noodles and picked up her fork, and Allie asked, "So do you do a lot of undercover work, Haley?"

There didn't seem to be any rancor in the question, and Haley's lack of shame about it might have been disarming. "Not really," she said. "I'm good at flying under people's radar, though. Not standing out."

"Yeah, I know what that's like." I thought again about the necklace Allie used to wear in her old life, felt another stab of the guilt over the realization that it was somehow suppressing her... and yet, now that she actually was in danger, I wanted to give it to her all over again... just for a little while, to keep her off the Nobody's mind. If it ever worked at all on him, it might be useful, during this last wrap-up stage. Or it might be useful for me to keep it.

"Really, people hire me for my observational skills," Haley continued. "I'm good at spotting someone in a crowd, and picking up on things people normally miss." Then she had to add, "Like the vibes between the two of you. Honestly I think you're both fooling yourself with the 'just friends' things."

"Is that what you specialize in? Reading people?"

"No... I've got some training in infomatics, data analysis, statistics, yadda yadda yadda." I had no idea if any of that was true. "Basically, math finds it's way into a lot of things people wouldn't expect."

"Yeah, yeah, Like Numb3rs."

"I mean, yeah, but any calculator can shuffle numbers... what I do is a little beyond just writing down equations..."

"No, I mean like Numb3rs. Numb-3-ers. The old TV show?"

"Oh," Haley said, thrown off her game. "Heard of it. Never watched it. Anyway, for me it's more intuitive. I can do the math, when I need to. Mostly I can just see things, pick out patterns. People hire me when they have a problem they just can't solve, or need fresh eyes on something, and, it might take me a while, but I can usually find a way to make their work more efficient, or find weaknesses and vulnerabilities that an insider can't see, or give them some key insight. In certain circles, I have a reputation for it. I guess you could call me a consultant."

"'Dear God, why would anyone listen to a consultant?'" Allie said. I could tell she was quoting something, though it took a second before it clicked. A Series of Unfortunate Events. Another show we watched together, and I instinctively smiled in her direction to show her I remembered, before I realized that she remembered watching it alone. "Sorry, just a quote."

Haley didn't seem to get the reference, and she could have been offended by the words alone, but instead took it with good grace and more than a little confidence. "I've saved a lot of people from a lot of pain and suffering. Like I could with you guys. Seriously, you'd be much better off if you just went for it instead of depriving yourselves. Listen to the consultant this time. Sometimes you can only see the obvious from outside the system."

Allie's eyes flicked in my direction, as though reading my face at the suggestion, but then quickly back. "I'm sure we'll muddle through somehow without the help of a consultant, thanks," putting some emphasis that politely but firmly seemed to suggest Haley butt out, because she put her hands up in a 'well, I tried' gesture. "Besides, nothing's going to happen until this case is over anyway, so... maybe we should return to that subject."

"Oh, I can't talk about this case." Just as firm.

"Even though I'm helping now?"

Haley shot me a questioning look. "Allie knows the person I'm looking for. At least, a little. She's not sure of his name, but she's going to take us to the class she has with him on Tuesday." I clarified, "Or she's going to take you, anyway. You try and glean what you can while you're there, and then let me know where he's going."

"Well, that's helpful. And Allie knows..." Haley trailed off, fishing.

"Alyssa."

"Right." Haley's lips quirked, almost certainly noticing that she was corrected on that point, but I wasn't.

'She knows that he's potentially dangerous, but we're also not sure he's actually who I'm after. The specifics I'm still not allowed to disclose."

"So, I know you're not allowed to talk about the case either," Allie started, trying her efforts on Haley where she failed with me. "But you know the details, right? More than I do, anyway?" Haley nodded. "Is that true? Is this guy you're hunting actually a threat?"

The geas shouldn't have prevented her from giving a straightforward answer, but in her mind there wasn't one. "Well, that's an interesting question, really. I've never met this guy, so I have absolutely no idea if he's what they say he might be. If he is, I can definitely see things getting dangerous. At the very least, the authorities will want to stop him, and he definitely will want to avoid that at all costs, so yeah, I don't want to be anywhere nearby if that goes down. But I haven't seen any actual evidence myself, so whether he's actually a threat..." She gave a half-hearted shrug. "Not my problem, really. My job is just to observe and see what I can find out about him."

Allie considered this, and I could see her mind working, evaluating the ambiguities. In the end, she must have decided I wasn't lying to her, and she relaxed into what had almost become another fun diversion to her. Like a Gumshoe roleplaying game she'd been recruited into. "Well, I don't think he's anybody," she maintained. "He just seems like such an ordinary guy. But so do most serial killers, and if he is some dangerous monster, better to know, right?"

"More information is almost always helpful." Haley glanced at me at this, probably because Allie sharing a class with him suggested that, despite what I said, she might be connected to the case after all, but I wasn't planning on giving either of them any more information unless I couldn't help it.

"So..." Allie continued, after a few seconds of silence, either changing the topic entirely or just choosing another tactic to question my version of events against Haley's, "if you're some intuitive statistic whiz, I'm sure that would help a lot with multiplayer games."

"Sometimes." The edge of Haley's lip tugged up and finally broke into a full grin. "Okay, you caught me. There are a lot of games my friends don't play with me anymore because I usually beat them. It sucks, honestly. But once of the benefits of travelling as much as I do is I can usually find a group to play with who have no expectations. And I figured, while I was here..."

Allie made a face. "Ugh. So you're a hustler. That's almost worse than what you did, Cal."

"Aww, but I just like to play. And to totally crush my opponents. But doesn't everyone want that? Why should I be left out just because I happen to be good? It's not my fault how my brain works."

It was obvious to me Allie wasn't being entirely serious, maybe the hint of playfulness in her eyes, but for Haley's benefit she said, "I'm kidding. I mean, it's not like we play for money or anything. Mostly. If you're really as good as you say, some people might just consider it a challenge."

"See, that's the attitude! You're so much cooler than Vegas. Stupid Vegas." She grumbled, speared some kind of vegetable and put it in her mouth. "And, to be fair, it's mostly pure card games I kill at. And I guess I'm pretty good at the social deduction too. But once you add in enough RNG... I might be able to judge the odds better than average, but I'm still at the mercy of the dice as much as anybody." At least, assuming she didn't use magic to cheat. Which she shouldn't be able to do right now, considering the geasa on her.

"Allie's protective of her friends though," I pointed out... though really testing her resolve and how must of my sister's trust I'd won back. "Club room's for actual students only." Would she walk back my disinvitation?

She seemed a bit chagrined by the reminder, while Haley said, "Phooey. Oh well, you'll play with me sometime, won't you Galahad?" There was an unexpected flirtiness in her voice that threw me off. "You're not afraid of a little competition, are you?"

I was about to formulate a response, but Allie said instead, "You know, I am allowed to bring guests who aren't students...but I'd probably have to vet you first. See how good you actually are." After a second, she added, "I'm going to have to head off to a lab soon, but... if you wanted, maybe we could all get together for coffee, after classes. We could play something while we discuss... you know, the plan for Tuesday."

"The plan?" It seemed to me like we'd already discussed it.

"Yeah, like, I could print up a floorplan and we could like give the exits codenames, so you know which ones he's going through. Haley and I could come up with a cover story for why she's visiting, in case anyone asks."

"People generally don't ask," Haley said, and although I liked that my sister tended towards over-prepared, she had a bit of a smirk on her face like she found it adorably earnest. I had to agree there was something cute about it, and... there was something so cozy about the idea of us both being on the same side, conspirators against someone else instead of keeping secrets from another. "But sure, we could do that. Could be fun. Not tonight, though, I have plans." I thought it might have just been a polite refusal, since she hadn't mentioned anything to me, except she immediately followed it up with, "Tomorrow, maybe?"

"I can do tomorrow. Maybe around two-ish?" Haley gave a tiny nod, and Allie looked to me.

Did she actually want me there, and this whole idea an excuse to spend time together? The thought of it sent another thrill through me I tried to downplay, tell myself that I was just excited she wanted to hang out again, that the distrust seemed to have vanished. Or maybe it was a feature of that distrust, she was merely asking my permission to continue participating, to not be shut out, again, like I had by lying to her... and, like I had for so long, before the meteor, by not telling her about a major part of my life.

This time, I thought I could unbend a little. It was another group setting, and maybe I could prep Haley with some suggestions and cues to limit the awkwardness. "Sure, sounds good. I'm not sure how much actually planning we'll need to do, but we can meet at least, talk about it." Maybe I could bring that necklace, and try to find an excuse to give it to her. "That same shop you had your recruiting?" I could even get there ahead of time and secure it from magical surveillance.

"If you want. I'll bring some card games. See if you really are as good as you say."

"Don't say I didn't warn you."

"Don't worry, I've got a few I think won't work so well..."

That was when my phone buzzed with an incoming message. I looked at it, frowned, mentally cursing the asshole who thought this was a good idea.

"Something wrong?"

The message told me that a package, with a realistic looking tracking code, was waiting for me to set delivery preferences, followed by a dodgy-looking link. Spam. Or rather, it looked like spam. "No," I said, as I inspected the tracking code, realized what it meant, and my heart rate began to pick up. "Well, yes. Shit." I closed the phone, pocketed it. This was one message I couldn't show to my sister to demonstrate my transparency. "I'm going to have to cancel tomorrow, I'm afraid."

Even Haley was interested at that. "What's up?"

"It's not a big deal, just..." What was I going to say? I supposed I'd gotten this far with tempered doses of truth, I might as well continue. "That was my, uh, employers. They need to meet with me. Tomorrow." That was hidden in the tracking code, as well as it being a meeting of the entire Council.

"We could do it after..."

"I don't know when I'll be back. There's going to be some travelling involved." That I was almost certain of, given previous such meetings. More details, I'd have to get through secure channels, but the when was most important and alarming in itself. Normally I'd get at least three days to prepare myself, but sometimes, the various schedules of the Council members only aligned with shorter notice. I hoped that was all it was... because the other option was that it was urgent.

Being summoned before the full Council was intimidating enough for any mage, even a Warden. But it being urgent was usually very bad news. Especially for a Warden.

Chapter 15

As a Warden I had frequent contact with the local Council, of course. I was supposed to operate independently, for the most part, but it seemed like they always had something to tell me. Things they wanted me to investigate, or sometimes ignore, advisories, check-ins, and so on. Mostly these came in the form of messages of one variety, occasionally an in-person meeting with one member or another... if they wanted to make it clear it was particularly important. Being called before the Council itself was different, and pretty unusual, even when it was just the district's branch. I've only once been in the presence of the High Council and I was never even addressed, I was merely one of several Wardens there just in case things went bad. Similarly, I've been tasked with bringing someone to a meeting with the Council from time to time, but I tended to not be privy to whatever discussions followed, I was just there to escort and stand guard outside the door. In my whole career, it's probably been under a dozen times that I've been called to personally address California's Council as a whole, including when I was first inducted. Their summons didn't necessarily mean I'd done something wrong in their eyes... in fact, none of my previous summonses (excepting the ones where I was being formally presented as a Warden candidate, or took the official office) had been about anything I'd done at all, they were more often general instructions or to pass on information I needed to know but that were a little too sensitive for other channels. That's not to say I've been a perfect Warden either, but when I'd made some minor breach of their expectations, it was usually a one-on-one visit with one of them, on my own turf. Still, there was always a dread associated with being asked to come see them, even when it wasn't short notice. It was a bit like being summoned to the Principal's office.

Not exactly, of course. Walking to the Principal's Office--in any of the schools I've attended--was like walking down a prison hallway wondering if execution was at the end. Going to meet the Council was more like going to an ultra-exclusive social function... and worrying you might have been invited as a human sacrifice or a Most Dangerous Game situation. High-level mages--at least the ones powerful enough to be on the Council--may have a lot of issues, but they tend to be rich as fuck in monetary terms. While most billionaires aren't mages--though they often have several whispering in their ears--everyone on the Council was at least on the high tiers of multi-millionairedom. It only stands to reason, they were the ones the best at the game of leveraging temporary pain and sacrifice into future gains, which is trickier than it sounds to most new mages, because material wealth can also be sacrifice material, and if the path to profit is too direct or done too often, it can backfire. Either directly, because the patrons believe the sacrifice wasn't real enough, or merely because they decide they've given their pet too many shiny toys already and that the next time the mage asks for something the sacrifice will include both more pain and some of the frills they've already gotten. Still, capitalism has its own magic, and once wealth reaches a certain point it tends to be self-sustaining, the rich getting richer while the poor get poorer. So over time, most mages do manage to accumulate a comfortable level of monetary wealth at the expense of other comforts, at least until they need a really big spell and have to start from scratch. It's mostly hard to get it to a really high level fast, in part because the easiest routes, probability manipulation and gambling, tend to jealously guarded by mages who locked it down early--at a professional level at least--and don't want somebody else interfering. That's what got Haley in trouble in Vegas, though apparently she was still doing so well that her head was in the clouds enough that asking for millions for a job seemed reasonable.

Myself, I usually had a few thousand in the bank, and probably could do significantly better than that, but in addition to preventing me from devoting my full attention to accumulating a hoard, my duties also required a lot more daily use and sacrifice than most mages... and sometimes it makes more sense to burn cash than draw blood. Luckily, unlike almost every other cost in the world, there's usually a scaling factor with magical sacrifices based on money. The Council might be rich as fuck, but I still could cast a more powerful spell with the last dollar to my name than one of them could by sacrificing a million... though of course, I could only do it once, while they would still have money to burn. It was rare I was down to my last dollar, of course... or even felt particularly poor. I officially worked for the Council, and so they gave me a generous stipend... but going to visit them in person was always a reminder that they were way out of my league. They could just rent a building with a meeting room in some city, but no, they always tended to meet in some kind of exclusive resort or spa they've cleared out for that purpose, somewhere in California. I say 'somewhere' because I typically didn't know where we gathered, not in advance, and usually not after, either. I've seen a couple different places, a ski chalet, something in wine country, a beachfront spa... I don't think any of them were places they owned directly, for fear one might backstab the other on home turf, but they also didn't make it easy to track down, presumably from similar paranoia, about people outside the Council knowing where they've met in the past and might meet again.

I don't know how all the others got to these meetings, but I had to take a fresh Warden road specifically tuned for that purpose... it would only allow me through if all my required Warden geases were intact, and part of the cost of activating the teleportation is the destruction of any electronics or enchanted items that track locations or transmit messages. That meant I had to leave my phone behind (and, since the sacrifice is a required cost, to buy a burner phone to smash), which made me itchy about the possibility of Allie or Haley needing to get in emergency contact, but there was nothing to do about it unless I wanted the Council to track me down and demand answers. These meetings were orchestrated on their schedules and my attendance wasn't optional. I instructed Haley to stay off campus while I was at the meeting, so her geas wouldn't prevent her from sending a message via magic if she really needed to... or if Allie called for help. Before I'd left I made sure I told my sister, in what I hoped was a casual way, that if she needed help and couldn't get in touch with me, to contact Haley. It would have to cover things, but it was one more reason I needed to be anxious about the visit.

After navigating the Warden roads to get near the specific one I needed, I left my car and gear in a safe space and made my way to a wooded area, ignored a No Trespassing sign, and found an old, overgrown well. There I smashed my burner phone with a hammer, nicking a bit of my forearm with a shard, then wiped the blood on a silver dollar the Council had waiting in a FedEx package when I got home. I tossed the remains of the phone into the woods (sorry, local wildlife), then the bloodied coin into the well, and walked into a nest of bushes that was off the main path but still had faint evidence of passage from whoever set up the road. I closed my eyes to avoid being blinded by thorns smashing into my face, and when I opened them, the air felt a little fresher and at least a five degrees warmer, and there was a fence in front of me. I followed it, past a sign (which was covered, as per protocol when the Council takes over a place), and onto a road, where a guard at a gate spotted me. If somebody stumbling out of the dense foliage rather than coming up the road surprised him, he didn't show any sign of it, just got out of the security box and asked if he could help me. It might have helped that I was dressed in slacks, a nice shirt, the usual sort of fare I wear in public. Expensive enough that I could sacrifice it for a spell if I needed to, that gave the signal that I paid attention to my appearance, but nothing flashy or anything that would stand out as trying to impress too much. Since I wasn't usually expected or even allowed to use magic anyway, early on, my temptation on being summoned to one of these things was to embrace shabbiness and go ultra-casual as an unstated fuck-you to the elitism. You know, show up to Council meetings wearing an old-t-shirt, jeans with rips in the knees, like I couldn't be bothered to look nice for them. But the thing is, unless you need to be meeting clients or something, being rich means you can wear whatever you want, and although they surround themselves with opulence, the Council themselves as often as not dressed down in ways that meant other people might confuse them for everyday schlubs too... except for the fact that to merely be there they'd have to be rich as fuck. So the message tends to be lost on them, and I started wearing my ordinary clothes, which at least helps with the help, since the guard didn't have his hand warily on his gun like I was a potential problem to scare away, but rather stood with an alert readiness someone would use if he saw me as a person who legitimately could have business at an exclusive resort, and just got incredibly lost along the way. Then again, he probably was told, in some limited way, what to expect. "I'm Mr. Warden," I said. "I believe I've got a meeting here."

"Of course, sir," he said, simply, relaxing just a little. He pressed a button on his belt and the gate began to retract. "They're waiting for you inside." At the door, I was met by a bright-eyed concierge, a woman with a short blonde bob haircut, who seemed to be in her early thirties, who greeted me, waited patiently for me to use the facilities briefly to wash up, and then escorted me to the resort's dining area, past a suite of full tables of nervous-looking people enjoying, if that can be the word for it, a dinner. These were, unlike the resort staff, direct employees and underlings of various Council members, and despite what I assume was a free meal as part of their duties today, about half of them were visibly on edge. Probably the others were as well, just more used to it, an awareness that shit could go down at any moment and knowing that they would likely be among the first casualties if it did. It had never happened while I was there, not in this District, anyway, but many of these were people who knew about magic, that all of the bosses gathered together made a tempting target, and that their various geasa would force them into action if anyone decided to make a play. To add to that, most of them didn't remember previous gatherings like this at all, even if they'd attended several, and were nervously watching their glasses more than I had when it was my first time. A few of the faces were familiar, but most were strangers to me. I did spot Kline, who was digging into a steak, and seemed to be among the less troubled ones, so maybe he was allowed to keep some of his memories. He didn't look up at me once as I brushed past everyone, into a private dining room.

There, the atmosphere was much more casual, although in some senses the layout was very formal. The Council is grudgingly viewed as a necessity for settling issues among the high-level mages, but none of them were types who really liked others intruding into their domain. Reflecting that attitude, at meetings like this, every member had their own table for one (well, for two, but their egos were big enough to dominate the space). Since I was being directly involved in this meeting, rather than just there as a precaution, they were arranged in a rough semicircle around a similar table that was meant for me. Behind me, at the door, was a buffet full of food... the Council had already gotten theirs, and many were well into one of the three glasses of libations at the table. One was a simple glass of water. The second was more varied... whatever preferred drink each individual member desired. The third, a glass of red wine, was not to be touched, it was part of the protocol. The concierge walked me to my table and asked if I'd like something in particular to drink, but I refused. There were bottles, and various hot drink machines I could use to serve myself with at the edge of the buffet, which I turned to next as the concierge left.

The food looked top notch, as you might expect. I mean, it was mostly standard fare... sure, there were status symbols like caviar and lobster, but mostly it was just ordinary food, but the best and freshest ingredients, prepared to exacting standards by people who'd spent years learning how to bring out the most in them, and that makes more of a difference than you'd imagine, or at least before I did before I got my first taste of how the ultra rich eat. I wished they'd scheduled this little meeting for a few days later when I had my taste back, and could enjoy the treat, but before sitting down I still prepared myself a plate, some salmon and vegetables, just for formality's sake. The taste would be wasted on me, but acting normal would help me look like I wasn't worried, that I didn't have something to hide... and it wasn't like all that food wasn't going to be wasted anyway. Whatever we didn't eat would be used as part of a sacrifice for the spells to ensure almost nobody here even remembered there was a meeting at all. One of the shitty truths of the world, the best of everything goes to those who don't even want it, just so they could throw it away.

Plate settled on the table, I raised my arm over one of the glasses of wine and squeezed a single drop of blood into it to contribute to the collective magic... which was also pretty much a formality, at that point. Normal wards might be overwritten or temporarily bypassed or knocked back in power... sure it's hard, because it's magic-on-magic, but another mage determined enough, willing to sacrifice enough could do it... but once you've got enough people contributing to collective magic a ward can be made effectively impossible even to weaken. Collective magic's not great for everything, and the more vulgar the change is, the easier it is to interfere with--and good thing, too, or we'd be ruled by the whims of cults--but for something fundamentally defensive it's hard to beat, even when you're fuelling it with participants who aren't that enthused about contributing. It's the same reason the protections of Wardens remain so strong even if unlisted mages try to ferret out our identities. Longer-duration spells might need to be periodically refreshed or they develop weak points, but for something that was only expected to last the afternoon, they didn't really need any of my magic to protect themselves any further. Before I arrived at the dinner, not only the individual Council members but many of their attendants had each shed blood to keep the meeting secure, and that's a lot of people working on a narrowly targetted, short-term effect that might never be needed. Thanks to all that speculative sacrifice, in addition to a few protections from mundane threats, the building and a significant area around it was now covered by an ironclad snitch field. If anyone, including a hypothetical stranger hidden under a table, either broke a geas or attempted any magic other than to contribute to the ward, all of the red in the wine would precipitate out of everyone's glasses, and the wine glass nearest the violator would shatter. This included me, too... and this effect was already in place, whether I put my own blood in or not. It's part of the reason they trusted me to carry a gun in here. Still, I paid the blood tithe out of tradition--I was still bleeding from the spell that got me there anyway-- and sat... though I left the second wine glass empty since I wasn't drinking, and merely settled the water in front of my plate, waiting for... whatever this was, to begin.

They watched me take a few ashen bites, before I was asked the question that typically started these things when my presence wasn't merely precautionary. "How are things in the district of California, Kovacs?" It could have come from anybody, but this time around, it came from the one I thought of as the Producer. As part of my initiation, I was geased never to speak the name of the Council members directly to other mages, or to directly target them in spells myself (save certain exceptions outlined in the Accord), and such habits are hard to break, so I'll use the titles I came to give them in my head. Which aren't entirely to be trusted. At least three of the Council there, for example, were involved in producing movies, or music, or plays. Probably more, if I dug into it. It's not only a common fantasy for those who gained magic as a way to indulge their lifelong dreams but it's an easy pretext to inconspicuously pay for some big magic from a patron by deliberately creating a massive bomb. However, the mage I thought of as The Producer was not just merely one of the mages in the category, he's the one who, if you somehow met all the Council at the same bar, you'd be least surprised if he casually dropped the fact that he was a Hollywood producer and suggest that he might get you a part if you wanted to do some cocaine with him. To be fair, I don't know if he actually did drugs at all... a lot of mages avoid it, but on one-on-one encounters he always bought both of us drinks like it's the easiest way he knew to show camaraderie. I do know your odds would be a coin flip about whether the part he had in mind for you was a legitimate arthouse film or an adult entertainment venture. He had his fingers in both.

I've never been entirely sure if the Producer was a dog person or a cat person. Liz put him in the cat camp, but the rare times I'd seen him talk directly about his patron there was sort of a starry-eyed look to him that made me think of a dog eager to please his master. In terms of body-language, though, he was definitely more catlike, in the sense that he seemed like he'd be comfortable sleeping most of the day away. That might just be the contexts I usually met him, but he tended to slouch, loose and relaxed, looking almost drowsy. He kept long dark hair that was probably the result of a professional stylist yet still managed to look greasy, and--although I assume he sometimes wore a tux to events--the dressiest I'd ever seen him is in a dark suit jacket over a dark dress shirt with no tie and the top unbuttoned, an outfit he was also wearing at this resort. I often saw him with sunglasses, too, even indoors, although at this meeting. he went without, his eyes bulging and swollen like he was hungover but probably the lingering effect from some kind of spell. His words were a bit slurred too, but that was also normal for him... it, and the odd cadence he spoke in, were the legacy of some kind of European accent I've never been able to identify, probably a blend of several countries he travelled in before settling in L.A. and living his dream, and finding magic to help him achieve it. "Everything copacetic?"

A question like this was traditionally an opportunity for me to update them on anything I felt they needed to be informed of, or to request additional support or resources if I needed them. Today, it could be a trap, if they somehow knew I was on the trail of a Nobody and hadn't yet reported it. Still, as much as I believed that was true about my target, there was too much that didn't add up and so I didn't consider my suspicions officially confirmed yet, which I hoped would give me the leeway if they called me on it or they'd set something up for lie detection. "I've got a few cases in progress," I said, trying to think rapidly about how I might explain them if they took me up on my next offer. "Nothing big, but I could outline them, if you'd like." They never had the previous times they asked. The Council wasn't especially interested in the nitty gritty. Unless this time, they were. I gave them a few seconds to jump in, but they weren't forthcoming, so I followed up with my next usual line. "I'm more worried about the stuff I'm missing," and put a little more anger into it this time. "I barely caught that cult a few weeks back before they unleashed a meteor strike. For all I know right now there's another cult in... I don't know, Modesto, trying to trigger a fault line so they can be closer to the beach. California's a big district for one Warden to monitor."

If this was a normal meeting, the timing only advanced by coincidence, at this point I would expect one of them--the Pastor, maybe--to say that they had full confidence in me and the early warning systems. Instead, my heart jumped as I heard the Hippie clear her throat to say something. Liz used to call her 'that Hippie Karen,' and occasionally added a few even less polite words after that. Although the first part of the moniker fit--in that she looked like (allowing for a little age-slowing magic) she might have been a hippie if she was a teenager in the sixties but then grew up and mostly sold out to a corporate life and just still wore hand-knit sweaters and crystals to convince herself she still connected to Mother Earth and all that--but I dropped the rest of the appellation. Maybe she and Liz had more history that justified the extra negativity, but her behavior in our interactions didn't seem particularly egregious, nor did she seem particularly more Karen-ish than any other white woman now in her apparent fifties or sixties. Still, her choosing to speak was not the encouraging sign I was hoping for. If there's a boss in our local Council (and Officially, there never was, but in practice...) she was it, or at least she's consistently garnered the most support for divisive issues and was the regular representative to the High Council that deals with affairs affecting multiple districts. I imagine whenever there was serious friction between the Council and a Warden, she was probably the face of it, so that have been the source of Liz's frustrations, but, as I said, our own interactions hadn't been particularly bad... at worst she got a little condescending. So I merely thought of her as the Hippie... but what she said, in her usual tired voice, surprised me. "Well, that may be due to change." I tensed up, guessing that was why I was there after all. Had they gotten wind that I wasn't telling them about a suspected Nobody in the area--or maybe, discovered evidence of one independently of me--and were telling me to call in reinforcements? "The High Council is considering another... direct intervention. Did your mentor brief you on the previous one?" I nodded. "There's some concern we didn't do enough."

I relaxed, oddly relieved... first, that this didn't seem to involve me at all, not directly, but also that they planned to actually do something. Every time I watched the news and that man showed up it felt like they'd left some business dangerously unfinished. I don't like to do it, but I've executed mages for less irresponsible shit than this guy did, and they didn't take any action against him for flagrantly violating the Accords, other than excommunication. Of course, the more wealthy and famous you get, the less anything else becomes an option for many reasons, and maybe an ex-president could slip through mage justice just as easily as he seemed to the conventional kind. But it still seemed like they could at least intervene to take him off the public stage, where he could still be dangerous, especially if somebody screwed up and... "He should have no access to magic anymore, though, right? I'm told there's no way to reverse that." At least, I hadn't heard of one.

She took off her glasses, looked at me. "Not as far as we're aware, but that vile man did attract a large following, and, given the way the winds seem to be blowing on that side of the aisle... we're concerned there maybe he's still getting help. If he were to get power again..." She shook her head, leaving the thought unfinished. But I could imagine the concerns... he might put those mages supporting him in positions where they could do the exact sort of things as before, turn the whole country into a Harvester for suffering. "The Council doesn't like interfering with conventional politics, even when, frankly, they probably should... but the situation's unprecedented and it's looking like it might not just be the moral thing, but the safe thing, which is more important to them." She folded her hands, leaned forward. "Of course, the man does have his supporters, some of whom, I assume, might feel conflicted about intervening on behalf of candidates and policies they don't approve of, even if it's just to negate outside assistance he's receiving. Does this prospect of you being called upon to help bother you, at all?"

"No," I said, trying to seem neutral, even though from what I understood the Hippie was definitely not among his supporters and probably was one of the ones lobbying the Council for increased action. Most of the others there, I didn't have a good read on, and any of them might replace her as the representative to the High Council at any moment, and if the winds changed dramatically, showing too much of a bias could get me in trouble later. So I hedged. "Given how the Accords were violated last time around, if there's mages still actively helping him, they probably need to be firmly dealt with." And sometimes it seemed like mages continuing to be in his corner was the only thing that made sense. Unless the world was just insane. "Politics doesn't come into it for me. I'll do my part." Were I honest, I'd be glad to, as long as it started after I'd made sure my sister was safe.

"Good to hear it. However, it's not a sure thing. Some of the Highs think we should just let things play out naturally."

"Some even think, now that he's neutered, his election could be a good thing," the Producer suggested. "Just what the country needs." The Hippie shot him an icy look. Gossip said they used to be a thing, and whether they sacrificed whatever affection they had for each other to gain some benefit from their patrons, or it just soured on its own, they clearly dislike each other enough now that it was hard to tell if the Producer actually felt this way or was just needling her for the sake of it. I'd lean towards the latter, but I didn't know the Council well enough. Still, it did look like at least a couple of the other members either agreed with the sentiment expressed or didn't disagree.

After that one look of disgust, the Hippie seemed to do her best to ignore both the idea and the person giving it. "Regardless, if we do need you, it might make it hard to focus on your normal duties. As such, we're here to formally advise you to start looking for Warden candidates and considering who might be appropriate for an apprenticeship."

I heard a gravelly voice asking, "You have someone in mind already?" This was one I called the Heavy. Now, muscular physiques are common among mages, but the other men on the Council who had them went for the more common 'Hollywood star with a personal trainer' look. True, some of them might have been in a real fight now and then, but it was more about their self-image than anything else. The Heavy left no doubt to anyone who looked at him that he was a bruiser. He was broad and stocky, muscles that looked bulkier than they needed to be, with a thick neck. His face was rough face with a nose that's probably been broken a few times with visible scars, including a big one near his eye. There were more scars, on his hands, if you took a look while he gave you an aggressive, even painful handshake. Yet he was also familiar with the finer things in life, and unlike most of the Council always dressed in an understated but very expensive designer suit. Less understated were the gold rings. You might guess to look at him he was an ex-boxer or something, but to me he always gave off the vibe of someone in a mafia movie who started out as the muscle and somehow rose through the ranks to head the family. That may in fact be exactly what happened, though I'm not certain. At the very least, I know the majority of his income did not come from legitimate businesses--although he had those as well, for laundering purposes. So, yes, he was a criminal, which didn't reflect well on the Council, but to be frank, organized crime as a power base isn't necessarily worse than what others on the Council did legally, and, as far as I'd seen, the Heavy at least had a certain code of honor. He seemed to loathe any magical use of mental coercion and was even part of a minority faction who once advocated for sanctioning those who employ memory alterations. I don't know if he was a cat or dog person, but he had very firm ideas about what the proper uses for magic were, and I could respect that, at least. I've heard his faint Russian accent on the tipline a number of times, advising me of behavior he merely found 'troubling.' In fact, Liz told me she'd only ever taken out a Council member in her role as a Warden once, and that happened because the Heavy came forward with the evidence of a serious Accord violation.

Lacking firm evidence of something actionable (murder and drug trafficking and various other things that didn't involve magic at all didn't count), I was forbidden from acting directly against members of the Council by geas anyway. I knew the Heavy was a criminal, and I didn't like him, but I could work with him more than most. In an ideal world maybe I'd have worked harder and used my investigatory authority to find some loophole to take him down if I felt I could do it without blowback or someone worse taking his place, but I guess I'm a 'devil you know ' type. I've dealt with the kind of dangers that unmonitored, lone-wolf mages can bring us on many occasions, and fighting back against it cost me almost more than I could bear... and as lax as the local Council could be, it was still much easier to police with their resources behind me. Working within the system unfortunately meant working for the powerful, and powerful people often suck. At the very least, I could say I didn't know of anything particularly vile in the Heavy's background... and there were already far bigger villains in the world I had pretend to respect, so I could be polite even to him.

As for his question, I'm not sure whether he read what I thought was a pretty good poker face, or if he just had a particular interest in who might be enforcing the laws, but I answered carefully anyway. "I know some possibilities with what might be an appropriate temperament." I've never been entirely sure if Truth Detection--that is, benefiting the Council only--was one of the wards already in place for a meeting like this, but I always did my best not to outright lie, just in case. That's always a difficult spell to pull off anyway, and not especially reliable even when you do, because human beings lie to everyone so casually, even ourselves, and even magic has trouble keeping up with it. Sure, maybe you can make a deal with to try and set up something to trigger on outright, bald-face lies, but to accurately sift objective truth from all the various types of falsehood, a patron would have to look back through time, parse all of human language and shades of meaning, factor in what a speaker knew and thought and whether they were making a joke or metaphor, all while being aware of all the various revisions they've made to recorded history and what people remembered, not to mention risk potentially breaking other bargains already agreed to that a liar might have made to protect themselves... and though all of that's that's certainly possible given some of the other stuff they've done, they don't seem inclined to do all of that to satisfy our petty and frequent need for reassurances. You want that, agree to a geas, you're probably better off, but even that's not perfect. Even here in my telling this story, where sharing my truth is a key part of the process, the spell this is crafting only expects me to be as truthful as I can, and that allows omissions, mistakes, exaggerations, certain self-deceptions and even occasional outright contradictions from the facts for dramatic effect if I have the intent to correct them later, regardless of whether or not I wind up remembering to do so. What matters is that I feel, at the end, I've been fundamentally honest. However, I feel obliged to admit here what I wouldn't to them, that my first thought was the possibility of apprenticing my sister... who was, as far as everyone on the Council knew, not actually my sister, and held no relation to me whatsoever, therefore did not violate the rules against inducting family into magic. I realized the same fuzziness that makes absolute truth detection so hard might just allow me to ignore the geas against it and put her name forward and claim that we're not related, that doing so would allow me to tell her about this side of my life, and, attached to all that, just maybe, having a connection to a patron (or the patron, if you subscribe to the God-with-many-faces theory) might allow her to unlock her true memories.

I wasn't going to tell the Council that, though. As far as they were concerned, truthfully, she was a possibility I knew of, as were others. "I'm not sure how strong their memory resistances all are, though, so I'd have to test to find out if they're truly candidates. It might be best to find non-mages whose minds are strong enough first and then see if they are appropriate for the job, rather than recruit from existing mages." That was how I was found, after all, Liz realized she couldn't wipe my memory of what I saw and, after explaining to me, saw something in my reactions that made her want to train me. My instinct was that that was all-around a better approach. Someone who's already a mage could be pretending to be interested in justice to get in a position of power.

The Hippie nodded along, impassively. "We trust you to make the decision as to how best to proceed--the Council has some records of people who have proved resistant but are still more-or-less uninitiated into the mysteries, if you need a starting place...--just give us at least three candidates sometime in the next three months." She looked up. "By then we should know whether we need a fill-in while you help the High Council."

"We won't," said the woman in the scarf. Liz called her the Vampire Bride, because that affectation resembled something someone would use to hide a vampire bite. That and the fact that she was the one who's patron caused her eyes to bleed for most spells. And she was super pale with dark hair, if she was an actress, she would have to have been cast as one of the undead at some point, although she might have had to bulk up to project much menace, since while she was certainly attractive, her body looked exceedingly frail, and she sometimes needed assistive devices to move. We all make our own kinds of bargains for our magic, and hers seemed to be weighted towards a heavy physical toll. Blood was usually at least part of the cost of every spell, but not necessarily the only cost. Yet she was a dog person, and never complained, at least not where I could hear it. Other dog people also tended to have less faith in human nature than she did. "They're just paranoid because the media likes a horse race. No one would possibly give him power again... his brain is clearly melting, not to mention all the trials..." She shook her head, a look of disgust crossing her features. "I'm glad this is finally spurring us to look into extra Wardens--we should hire them, regardless, just as a backup--but that man's done. He's a joke."

"I wouldn't count him entirely out." That was the Tech Bro. Tall, short hair, tight black shirt stretching over to show off his gymrat body, and jeans. Last of all, a face that made you just want to punch him on sight, provoking an urge so strong that I'd have been certain was the cost of some spell if it hadn't developed slowly over dealing with him. Even now he was smirking like he thought the Vampire Bride was being naive. He was the newest member of the Council but acted like he knew better than anybody about how the world worked. Which worried me, because he and the Pastor seemed to be the ones who leaned towards non-intervention when the Producer suggested the potential upside of an ex-mage in power. "He's always been good at capitalizing on public anxiety, and inflation is a factor these days... besides, Joe's brain's not doing so well either."

The last thing I wanted for this meeting was to sit in on a political discussion with these people, but luckily Wardens, unlike all the other employees of the Council weren't the kind of people that can just be fired for impertinence, so although I usually tried to show respect, most of the time, I knew sass was sometimes an option to move things along. Liz told me they expected a little pushback from their Wardens, that they needed to see us annoyed with them now and then or they'd start to think they were giving us more resources than we needed. "Okay, got it. I will officially look into getting more Wardens," I snapped. "Is there anything else?" I was probably pulling off grumpiness more than sassiness, but that worked just as well. "'Cause right now it's looking like this Council meeting could have been an e-mail."

I took some measure of pride that the line actually got a few smirks. At least half of the Council didn't want to be here any more than I did. The Hippie didn't find me amusing, just said, with a hint of reproach, "You know we don't trust major issues to email, Kovacs." She didn't pronounce my last name right, but I stopped trying to correct her long ago. "And it's not all about you. There are some issues we need to discuss and you have to be on hand for." I knew this, didn't really expect to be able to just leave, just to perhaps move it along a little. Though I was surprised when she said, "But yes, your part is pretty much done, if you'd prefer to take your dinner outside and listen for breaking glass." The very offer suggested that they didn't want me here while they discussed the remainder of whatever caused them to convene in person. Otherwise they'd want me in the room just in case they turned on each other, both to respond faster and as a deterrent. Maybe the Council just needed to debate the High Council's proposal among themselves, whether--as a district--they were going to support intervention or advocate against it, though I had a feeling there was something else. I've never been privy to all the Council's business.

There was one more bit I was privy to, though. The Pastor cleared his throat, ostentatiously, which must have reminded the Hippie. "Yes, right. One more thing, while you're here. We've got a transient in the District. You need to approach her and invite her to tithe." Invite was a euphemism. Instruct would have been more honest... in other words, I had to tell her she needed contribute some pain or blood or maybe money to ongoing spells like the Warden protections. It's one of the less glamorous routine duties a Warden gets, and usually that was just handled through messaging me a list of names and locations and a photograph or good sketch and instructions to make contact. And often these invitations were skipped entirely. You don't have to tithe every time you stop in another District. Mages often have money and that means they'll travel a fair bit, and it would get tiresome tithing every time they crossed a border. It's usually just required if you're expected to operate in one place long-term, or you don't have a home district. Or the Council just doesn't like you and isn't ready to take major sanctions but wants to mildly harass you, which made me expect what was coming next. "She goes by the name Haley Tien, although she may have changed it again. We're pretty sure that, at some point--after she plays tourist for a bit, no doubt--she's planning on tracking down Morales, up in Fresno." Considering her interest in birds, that wouldn't be particularly surprising, although she hadn't mentioned him to me. It also made me wonder about the extent of the Council's sources. Sure, another mage might have put her in one of the Diaries and alerted them to her presence, but to know enough to be able to figure out where she's going seemed like more than the usual level of knowledge. Then again, they didn't give me the last name she was using on campus, either, so it wasn't perfect. "He been advised and should contact you if she sets up an appointment. If she doesn't make contact in the next few weeks, you'll need to track her down another way, make an official introduction, and maybe put a tracker on her."

That was also more than the usual level of intervention for somebody just passing through. "What justifies that?" I can be pedantic at times but there was no need to explain that my finding spells didn't usually work by putting a physical tracker object on someone--generally unreliable with other mages--as they did by finding a good way of tracking them even without contact. The Hippie either already meant that, or simply didn't care about fine details. "Is she trouble?"

"Probably," the Pastor said.

The Hippie mildly contradicted him, without comment. "Not on the level you'll have to deal with. On her own, she's probably harmless, but she hires herself out for specialist work and, right now, that makes her a bit too much of a wild card for us not to want an eye on, especially with everything going on. We don't really know her loyalties or those of who she works for."

I didn't think it was a good idea to admit she was working for me, especially with what the Pastor said next. "Also, she's an abomination," he filled in smoothly, like his personal opinion was gospel, no pun intended. Okay, pun a little bit intended. But as far as I could tell, the Pastor was a cat person and, if he believed at all in the God of the Church he ran, would have to consider himself and his patron an abomination as well, so when he used the word, I knew he meant it in the way he considered all permanent transformations via magic as such. I also knew that wasn't a majority opinion, yet. "We don't have a picture for you because she's got a shifting glamour on her... honestly, I don't know why we allow her to walk around at all. If you see an excuse to take her out, do so."

"That's not an official order," the Hippie clarified. "Just invite her to present herself and tithe, and find a way to keep tabs on her in case she doesn't."

"Or in case we add her to the list of forbidden transformations." Seemed like Haley wasn't being overly cautious after all, asking me for that favor. At least the Pastor thought it was a possibility in the near future, although, if I knew the Council, they weren't close to a consensus. They were divided on many issues... and it wasn't just a matter of one bloc not having the votes to enact their agenda, on any given topic people who were vehemently at odds on one issue might find themselves agreeing on another. Here, I was pretty sure the Pastor and the Heavy both learned hard towards banning transformations like that, and the others I couldn't tell, but the sentiment clearly wasn't strong enough to put a ban like that into place yet. Because Haley seemed harmless, I'd resolved that I'd give her the agreed-upon grace period if one ever came to pass, and, in the event she didn't leave and yet also didn't make trouble, I'd extend her free pass and simply find excuses not to be able to track her down.

"I'll keep myself ready for a trip to Fresno, then." I tried to sound mildly annoyed to cover my little lie of omission. There was no reason to tell them I'd already met Haley. This way I could put off my official notification of her needing to tithe until she set up a meeting with Morales, if she did. A show of good faith in advance for whatever work she might have been able to do for Allie. For the Council, though, I could dovetail my lack of enthusiasm back into another frequent complaint. "The Warden Roads could use better coverage, though. Always feels like it eats up my whole day when I have to go too far inland." While Fresno has plenty of Drive-Thrus, none are magically linked into the network, so a visit meant navigating public transit, and often the schedules meant a lot of waiting. If I actually had to make a trip out there, I knew I was going to have to make sure I had a good book.

When I said this, Tech Bro was taking a sip of what looked like beer, and put it down on the table with enough extra force to draw my gaze. "Magic costs, dude." he reminded me, as if I needed the reminder. "I don't want to have to increase my tithe just so you can get around a little easier." As if most of the magic provided by the Council wasn't actually contributed by employees who wanted to be given magic themselves. "There aren't exactly a lot of power players out in Fresno to make it worth it." As if he wasn't probably already thinking about developing an algorithm for the maximum magical benefits for minimum sacrifice. That was what they said happened to an earlier Tech Bro on the Council, before he disappeared--that the patron got angry at his impertinence and made him pay later. More fanciful versions of the story say he worked out an agreement where his patron provide services and extracted sacrifices based what his algorithm deemed was appropriate, but because of a glitch one common magical request unexpectedly cost him every cell of his body. That's probably just a folk tale, especially because everyone has a different story of what spell was his final undoing, but people agree that one of the old Council did mysteriously disappear during the Dotcom bubble, after a run of magical good luck. Most likely, his patron just instituted some kind of extreme magical inflation that bit him in the ass, and he dropped out of both the magical community and the field he first gained success in, but was alive, living in obscurity and the shame of being unable to afford accessing his magic to even the smallest degree. That happens, and if either outcome happened to this Tech Bro, I wouldn't have been too bothered. I already disliked his condescending ass, if you couldn't tell, and not just because he was the one who had the idea of disguising Council notifications as spam. He was only a few years older than me, a few years more experienced in magic, and, unlike me, didn't have a pressing need to use magic on a regular basis beyond his own enrichment, nor did he have a mentor guiding him through worst case scenarios. He bought his way in, to both magic and the Council, and yet acted like his position was due to hard work and inherent skill and my concerns were meaningless. If whoever sent that message on campus was from the Council, he'd be my top bet. He'd probably consider working with a Nobody 'disruptive' and the kind of clever idea ordinary folks would never come up with.

I didn't bother trying to explain, again, about how if someone wanted to break the Accords, they'd set up shop somewhere where there aren't a lot of other mages to oppose them. It wasn't just Fresno... Morales seemed harmless, from what I could tell, but having quick access to the whole district could mean the difference between nipping a problem in the bud or letting it fester in a small town until it was something I couldn't handle alone. Even if I reminded Tech Bro about the Demon of Paso Robles (not actually a demon, technically speaking) or the Werewolf of Mammoth Lakes (actually a werewolf, or rather an actual, albeit accidental, version of what we mages call a werewolf transformation at least), I'd be brushed off, the incidents considered exceptions, as though a Warden's job wasn't mostly exceptions. Besides, as far as the Tech Bro was concerned if I needed to get somewhere outside the roads in a hurry, I could sacrifice a more myself, which, true, but still something I saved for emergencies.

Instead of arguing, this time, I just looked blankly at him for a few seconds, like he'd said something stupid and I was giving him a chance to realize it, and when he didn't, turned back to the Hippie, silently inviting her to move to whatever topic was next on the agenda, that hopefully didn't involve me. She pressed a button on her table, and said, with a wave, "Enjoy your dinner, Kovacs." Seconds later, the door opened, the concierge stepping into the room, flanked by two of the waitstaff. "Mr. Warden will be having the rest of his meal just outside."

Without a word, they came to take my plate and glasses and transfer them to the empty table that sat nearest the door. I took only the wine glass with my blood in it--not that their handling it would disturb a spell that had been reinforced by that many other people, but it's a good habit to not let unaware people handle something that's charged with magic--and followed them out. The door closed, and they placed everything on the empty table that sat nearest the door, where I sat in what was actually a more comfortable chair, in a more comfortable setting. Slightly, anyway. It was still a fancy dining room in a swanky resort, and though I had more in common with the other guests than I did the Council--we were all employees, in some sense, though I was a lot closer to an independent contractor--I was always apart from them too, because I had actual magic, and most of them didn't, or didn't have free use of it. I've more in common with the various free agent mages, and were any of them in attendance, I might have had somebody to talk to. Instead, I tried another bite of my tasteless meal and then put my fork down, done with trying, just sat. I felt their eyes occasionally drifting towards me, but didn't make any effort to interact, or even return their gazes.

I did spare a glance towards the concierge, who was standing on the opposite end of this side of the door. Like me, she was waiting, only she wasn't waiting on a signal that would mean major disaster... she was just holding herself ready to spring into action and service when the Hippie or one of the others pressed one of the buzzers on their tables. That was how she arrived so fast to move me to the public dining room... she'd been outside the door the whole time. So were the two young men in white shirts and dark pants who took my plate out. Those two were sitting more casually at a table a few feet away, talking in low voices, but the concierge herself stood alert. Although she seemed at the utmost of professionalism in there, here, the way she stood, I could see the nerves, the need to impress. She must have been promised something if everything went well... to the waiters, this was just another set of paid hours, but to her, this was possibly the biggest opportunity of her career, to provide top tier service to a group of rich bigwigs who might become repeat customers.

You should relax, I wanted to tell her. It's not as big a deal as you think it is. Nothing you do is going to matter to them... in a few hours they won't even remember you were here. But I couldn't say that, because it would make me even more guilty not to be able to add, And neither will you.. Or rather, she would remember them as the time some shell corporation prepaid for the whole space and a lavish dinner to be prepared and yet never actually sent anybody there, and instead of giving the food to charity or something they just disposed of it as outlined in the contract. She wouldn't get her promised bonus or promotion or whatever for good service. At best all this anxiety would only earn her an ulcer.

I wasn't going to say anything, but then her eyes slid to me, catching me in the act of watching her, and I figured that might make the nervousness even worse if I left it like that. Even if she won't remember, it doesn't mean a moment of kindness didn't matter, so I flashed her a smile. "Don't worry, you're doing fine," I said. "Pretty much all they want from you is a good meal while they conduct their business."

Now that I'd made the first overture, acknowledged the nerves she probably thought she was hiding, she relaxed enough to smile. "It's more that everyone else looks so anxious," she said, and maybe it was partly true.

"Well, for most of them, it's their first time too." Or at least, the first time they could remember. Working for the Council means they're more likely to care that you remember they were there and what they were doing, not less. Wardens aside, of course. "But I've been to a few of these. Trust me. No one will have any complaints about you."

"How's the food? You don't seem to be enjoying it."

I shrugged conceding the point. "I just don't have much appetite today. Not your fault, I'm sure it's lovely, objectively, I just can't right now. Which kind of sucks... the fine food's always the highlight of these events. I'd never get a chance to eat anywhere this fancy unless they're paying the bill." Probably, anyway, although I really didn't know exactly how expensive the place was. Maybe it was the kind of thing I could swing on a date for a special occasion, or maybe it was some kind of $10,000 a plate monstrosity that the ultra-rich use to impress one another. Either way, I tended to either cook for myself or grab fast food, so Council meetings were usually a step up and a culinary treat. "Especially the dessert. I've bet you've got some great desserts." I'm not usually such a sweet tooth, but I'd been deprived. Or rather, I'd had sugar but I hadn't tasted sweetness in days, and was craving it.

"We do," she admitted. "I'd offer you some to take home, but... the instructions from your bosses are weirdly specific."

"Yeah," I sighed. "They usually are." Maximizing waste for sacrifice. Technically, taking a little bit of food home shouldn't compromise those spells, but protocol was protocol and I wasn't going to encourage her to break it. As it turned out, I didn't have to, but that was the end of our conversation, as she answered a different kind of summons, when a white-haired, well-dressed member of the staff approached her and whispered something in her ear. She gave me a brief nod of acknowledgement and left the buzzer with one of the guys at the other table.

I returned to my job as well, which at that point was waiting. And worrying. It's funny all the time, being so connected, how much suddenly being without amplifies everything else you're worried about. If I had my phone with me, I could acknowledge that the Nobody had left my sister alone for as long as he had, and it wasn't likely to change, and if it did, she'd be able to get a hold of me nearly instantly... but since that last part was no longer true, my mind was going into overdrive, considering how I might get out of this if something happened and Haley was able to reach me, and, worse, darker thoughts about the catastrophic ways things might go wrong and I would only find out after I got back. Waiting, worrying, and feeling guilty, too, because my sister was most important to me, and maybe I couldn't watch over her every second but, still, for the sake of my job, I'd let myself get stranded for hours babysitting a business meeting, potentially unable to do anything if she needed me. The sacrifices that secured this meeting weren't limited to physical waste, either. Sometimes, our time was part of the price as well. Occasionally, this was paid in advance, with enforced isolation of all attendees, but on short notice meetings like this one, it could come after the fact. None of the Council's people, except perhaps those crafting the specific spell, actually knew what time we'd find ourselves at upon returning home. We all went in there knowing we might find extra hours lost we couldn't account for, even allowing for memory loss. Like our existences were just put on hold for a short spell. All part of the price of wiping that many memories at once and the other protective wards. So, of course I worried. I couldn't even check in. All I could do was what I was supposed to, stare into the wine and wait to see if this meeting was the one where members of the Council tried to kill each other and I'd have to risk my life for people I didn't really give a shit about.

Of course it wasn't, and objectively it didn't even last that long. Maybe another hour of discussion behind closed doors before, one by one, members of the Council found the excuse to leave and take their entourage with them. Sometimes this happened directly, like when the guy Liz called (perhaps unfairly) the Mini Magnate stalked out of the room first, gathering his people and heading to the exit. He hadn't spoken once during that meeting, and it was rare he had anything to say while I was in the room. I always got the impression he was akin to someone who lobbied hard to join a secret society to do a lot of cool occult rituals to conquer the world only to discover it was really a lot of meetings he'd rather not have attended and doesn't want to burn bridges by leaving, so he pays only token attention. Maybe he just keeps his own counsel though. I had very little actual knowledge of him other than that he was an immigrant from China--although the few times he had something to say his English was flawless--and that he owned a lot of particularly small businesses, hence the nickname. Some of the others left in a similar, conventional fashion as the Magnate over the next few minutes... however a few simply summoned the concierge in to deliver some phrase which instructed those aligned with them to leave on their own, while their boss took a quicker, more vulgar exit. This possibly left the staff wondering how they left without anyone seeing... but they wouldn't wonder for long, because soon the clean-up team would activate the spell that wiped the memories of everyone who couldn't be allowed to remember the details of what went on here. .

Usually at meetings like this, the Warden has to be one of the last ones to leave (save the cleanup crew themselves), which stretched my wait out out interminably, but finally I was given leave to leave. On my way out I also got a little surprise that... well, it didn't make up for everything, but was still pleasant and unexpected. The concierge must have either had the natural instinct or been trained to go above and beyond when pleasing guests... or maybe she just took pity on me. As I headed for the door, she presented me a box wrapped in a plastic bag. "When you feel more up to the dessert," she said. "Technically this wasn't made for this event. The pastry chef left a cake in the fridge, a little treat for the staff." She gave a smile and said, "So I'm not violating any rules by giving you a slice." I didn't have the heart to tell her she was, technically, but she was trying to be nice, and maybe it could sit in my fridge a few days and still be delicious when my tongue was working again. It might have led to consequences down the line, but none of the clean-up team saw, so I didn't expect it to be a problem... again, the spells the Council used were pretty robust, and I certainly wasn't going to tattle her for it or make her feel bad for the effort. I took it with a smile and carried it into the woods and found the path back to my car, where I found it was about half past five, probably at most an hour lost to me. Relief flushed through my body that it wasn't more, and I grabbed my phone so, finally, I could check in with my sister.

All my worrying was for nothing. This time.

Chapter 16

While in San Diego, Haley stayed at a modest-sized second-floor AirBnB condo. By the nature of my job I'm super secretive about where I live, but even though the Council was looking for her, Haley apparently was not... although part of it was a matter of practicality. The geas web we set up required me to drop everything if the investigations got her in danger, and so, it stood to reason, I should know where to find her in case all she could get out was a call for help and not the full address. Still, when I texted about getting together for an evening coffee to discuss a few things, I wasn't expecting her to respond, "A face-to-face is probably a good idea but I'm not really in the mood to go out again. I've already had to deal with a fuckton of ambient music today and I just wanna stay somewhere quiet. Why not come here? Also, please bring something chocolatey."

The last part might have been a joke, but since she was making painful sacrifices on my behalf, I was going to take requests seriously. I did have the boxed slice of chocolate cake, and my first thought was, well, that's convenient but then I opened the bag to check on the size and noticed that the box an embossed logo on it, presumably from the site of the meeting. That was a serious faux pas,, from the Council's point of view, and they had their reasons for people not knowing where meetings were held--if a sudden, emergency meeting needed to be held, they might take the shortcut of holding it on the same grounds as the last one, rather than do the prep-work of recrafting Warden roads and other wards for a new place--but it didn't seem big enough to risk reporting. Giving another mage a clue like that seemed decidedly unwise though, and besides, I wanted to enjoy that cake when my tongue started working again, so I left it in my fridge and made a stop to pick up some chocolate covered mini-donuts on the way to Haley's place.

When she met me at the door, it looked like Haley was ready for bed. And not in a sexy way, either, like she was trying to seduce me... if anything, the opposite. Now that we were off-campus she was able to change her glamours again, so it was tempting to read messages into how she looked to me as conscious choices, and the message I got here was let's just be relaxed, but also not take too long, not do you like what you see?. She wore full peach-colored pajamas on and slippers that looked like fuzzy rubber ducks. Her hair was bunched up behind a hair tie, and she wasn't wearing any makeup--or maybe she never did, but the fact that she didn't look like it suggested she really was just settled in for a night in and this was one last bit of business. She stared at me for a moment like she'd forgotten she'd invited me, but the expression softened when I lifted up the box of donuts. "I do like an employer who can follow instructions," she said, and stepped aside to let me in. "More reliable than the DoorDash guy, at least. He forgot my dessert. Some people in this world don't realize how lucky they are I can't turn them into a newt."

We walked into the living room... someone else's living room, certainly, the decorating choices probably from the condo's actual owner, and it was difficult to tell what Haley'd brought with her and what was simply there, so I couldn't read much into her decor other than that she was not a neat freak. There was a wrinkled blanket on the long couch in front of the TV, which she must have been watching when I showed up, because it was on, though muted. She sat back down in her place and put the donuts on the table, where there was the remains of a take-out container sitting on the plastic bag it was delivered in, and some paper napkins. The one thing I did notice was that the ambient sounds completely vanished when I closed the door. That had to be magic, and I imagined a must-have for someone actively annoyed by music and living in a shared building. Probably the same reason she watched TV with only captions. Other than the soundproofing spell, I couldn't see any obvious signs of magic... there were likely wards, but I couldn't pick any out, and none set off any alarm bells with any of mine.

She waved me towards the armchair kitty-cornered to the couch and bit into one of the donuts while I got settled. I glanced at the television, trying to identify what was playing by the actors and whatever plot was might be revealed by the captions, but it wasn't anything I recognized, and soon abandoned the quest when she spoke, her mouth still a bit full of a bite, asking, "So, how was your meeting?"

"Dull, for the most part," I said, decided that this was as good a time as any to bring it up. "At some point, I'm supposed to get you to tithe for the District. If I happen to find you." She looked at me, wiped her mouth with a napkin, smirked. "And if you set up a meeting with a certain mage operating in Fresno, I'm probably going to find you. If you don't..." I shrugged. "Could take a couple weeks."

"I appreciate that. Wow, just got here and already the Council's on my ass, huh? Can't believe they called a meeting all about little old me."

"Don't flatter yourself, you were definitely a 'while you're here...' note. But they do want me to keep an eye on your whereabouts on an ongoing basis."

"And instead of doing that, you're telling me this?"

I shrugged. "If they want Wardens to be track mages, they have that option. It would be easy to make the Diaries mandatory, for example, tell everyone they need to log every spell they cast, everything being subject to inspection by Wardens at any time, but they don't, because they think mages should be allowed their privacy as long as they're not breaking the Accords. And I don't entirely disagree..." Not entirely, though I do think they should make it easier for a Warden to check if someone is starting to use their magic in irresponsible ways. Haley was almost certainly joking about turning people into newts, but there are those who use dark forces in ways that really should be stopped at the first instance. "...but it seems hypocritical to make exceptions without a good reason. Besides, I am keeping an eye on you right now."

"Fair enough. You're all right, Galahad. Even if you could be a little more forthcoming in other areas. So, you going to come clean and admit I found your star?" I stared blankly like I had no idea what she was talking about, though very aware that was in some senses as good as an admission. She leaned back into the couch. "Okay, I'm going to make a guess, and you tell me how close I am. You needed to cast a spell, a big spell, and it cost you your relationship with her. All her memories of you. But of course, you still remember and care, because the magic has to hurt, right? And it probably didn't stop with her memories, the Others did something to make her hard to find, too, because that... chemistry is still there. Maybe they left you with her face, but not her name, or maybe they just gave her an entirely new identity. So you're walking around, in pain, but still doing your job. You get a tip about a potential Nobody on campus... or maybe just mage activity that rings alarm bells, whatever... so you go check it out. And bam, you run right into her. Now, old California wouldn't have selected you if you were a dog person, but anyone's gotta look at that and wonder if maybe they set this up deliberately, the Others were giving you a second chance with her. You tell yourself you could maybe start a relationship with her all over again. But first, you've gotta take care of business. How am I doing?"

"Close," I admitted. Too close, even though she got the cause and effect wrong on finding the Nobody. I only found him because I was searching for Allie. And... "I'm not trying for a relationship with her," I insisted. "I just want her to be safe."

"And for her memories back, right?"

"To be honest, I don't know anymore." Yes, my first instinct was to give them back would be undoing the wrong I did her in the first place. But during my time sitting, waiting at the table right outside where the Council was discussing business, I'd thought about it more, had second thoughts, remembering that restoring her memories wouldn't work like undoing the kind of ordinary memory wipe everybody at the restaurant would experience. "If Allie gets all her memories back, she'll just be aware of how much her old life had been taken away. She'd remember friends that never knew her..." And consequently realize that most of her now-existing relationships were frauds, part of the spell. Maybe she'd just lose the invented memories of them entirely, leaving her adrift with no one but me that both knew her and was known in turn. "I don't think I could undo all of the changes Gnar--my patron--imposed, so... would I really be doing her any favors? Or would I just be harming her all over again?" Just so I could have her back. It didn't seem fair, or loving. Yet... she was my sister, and I ached to be her brother again.

"Shit, yeah, I see your problem..." Her head shook either in sympathy or in trying to find a way out. I'd hoped she'd come up with some answer, but didn't really believe it. "Yet you did ask me to look into it..." she pointed out.

"Yeah. I guess I'd just like to know the options. Maybe I can find some kind of... middle road." It didn't seem very likely, though.

"The good news--if you want to call it that--is, I think getting at her memories is doable. She might have no access to them right now, but the feelings are clearly still there, it's just that her consciousness is... avoiding the reasons for them. So if you do want the wall torn down, I think your best way in is through the unconscious. I mean, deja vu will probably help, so, like taking her to a favorite restaurant or giving her the same gifts you did before... and since she thinks you're undercover anyway it might be an idea to drop your wizard alias and get her to start using your real name." Of course Haley still thought Cal was an alias. I didn't want to dissuade her from that, so I was trying to think of an excuse for why I might not want to when she went in a direction I wasn't expecting. "But I was thinking something a bit more direct. You ever do any dreamwalking?"

"No."

"Neither have I. It's kind of ethically iffy, even if you're just Inceptioning a shared memory or something. And actually going inside someone's dreamscape is not something anyone should do without consent, but if you can get it... I think it might be your best bet, here. It might even let someone strategically only unlock a few key memories, enough to let her decide where to go from there. Of course, if you do it..."

"My patron might slap me down for trying to undo a sacrifice." Which in some ways was what it made it safe to explore the possibilities in a theoretical sense, because I shouldn't be tempted to actually try.

"There is that risk, yeah. Unless that's what they were counting on." I shot her an alarmed look. "You don't think the Others think ahead? Or use us to run little social experiments? I've seen too many mages get the cosmic irony treatment to not think they're just fucking with us sometimes. According to the simulation theory, we're all just video game characters to them, so if they put up a wall sometimes it might be just to see how we go about tearing it down, you know? Maybe they ship the two of you but just want to make the story satisfying in some way we can't understand."

That wasn't something I wanted to think about, especially since I don't think the Others really understand human culture and the reasons that siblings probably shouldn't be shipped. "So what exactly have you told her? You met with her today, right?" That was the real reason I wanted to talk to her face-to-face, to see if anything had happened. Changing the subject was a bonus.

"I met with her, and believe it or not, Galahad, it wasn't really about you. We talked over the excuse I'll give for meeting her at class, gave the exits code names--I'll send you a map later--but we also passed the Bechdel test and talked about quite a few things that were just none of your business. It's nice. I don't actually know anybody in the city and she's a fun person."

"Yeah, I don't need a play-by-play, but this would be a bad time to lose her trust because I contradicted something you said, so I do need to know what you told her about me and why I'm on campus. I'm sure she asked, right?"

"Sure, she had a few questions, and I think I answered them within the bounds of propriety. She asked about how we really met and why I lied, but in the end I don't think she held it against me. Mostly I played dumb. Oh, she thought your sudden need to run off to a meeting on a Saturday was a little suspicious, and tried to spitball some ideas with me... you know, of who might be hiring you that needed to be kept secret, what kind of crime you think the Nobody is involved in, but I just kept saying that it's none of my business, I just do the job I'm hired to do. Which isn't even a lie, that's my usual approach. I mean, I've been hired to find people before and mostly I don't care why or what's going to happen to them."

"Mostly," I repeated.

"I do have some standards." She didn't clarify, just said, "But you're right. She's super curious, and I think she wants to trust you, because her heart is telling her she should. But it could go sour real easily if things don't add up, and magic has a tendency to fudge the numbers. My advice? Don't see her again, not until Tuesday. Be vague and mysterious and absent. Don't even go on campus."

"I still need to check on the Harvesters," I reminded her, and her head bobbed to concede the point, but I continued anyway, "It's still better if we can end this without involving her, and if I can catch them collecting..."

"Oh, you won't on the weekend." She seemed confident enough about that that I was willing to take her word for it even before the explanation. "Not enough traffic to make it worth collecting. But if they're doing this on an ongoing basis, they might reset on Monday morning. I could handle that... be there early to have a look-see... and I'll stand out less than you anyway. Of course, there's always a chance whatever was in that message will have changed their strategy. Speaking of which, Alyssa's pretty smart and it looks like she's picked up on that being involved. I couldn't say anything other than that I couldn't say anything." Because of the geas, and it involved magic. "Right now she's still wrapped up in the how it disappeared from her phone rather than how it's connected, but you might want to have an answer ready for both."

"Thanks for the heads up." I wasn't sure how to deal with that one.

"And the best answer's going to involve magic, so, like I said, you might want to steer clear of her until this is over and you can tell her the whole truth. I can see how it bothers you to lie to her, Galahad." This time, she said the nickname more as a tease between friends, like she found it endearing.

"You're right," I said. "That's probably a good idea." Only sometimes you're drawn to the bad idea anyway. "But I'm not exactly going to sit on my hands. I'd still rather get this wrapped up early. Maybe now that I have the start of a name, I can have better luck at the gumshoe thing."

"Suit yourself. But just so you know, after this meeting, I am taking the rest of the weekend off. I might not even answer texts unless it looks vital. There's no way to charge for overtime when I'm being paid with a favor, so I've gotta advocate for myself."

She'd just had a day off, except for meeting with Allie and this one with me... which really wasn't a day off at all, especially not on a Saturday. Shit, I was being a bad boss. "Fair enough," I said. "You've already done more than I expected. Thank you. Seriously."

"Well, it is more interesting than just picking through wards looking for vulnerabilities. Going undercover's kind of fun, compared to what I usually do. But that's all the more reason I need to enforce my work-life balance, and the beach is calling me. You should take some time away too."

"Not an option, I'm afraid."

"You're probably putting her in more danger by hovering around her all the time. I know being a Warden gives you some anonymizing secret identity powers, but it doesn't mean they can't recognize you by sight. I get that you really got it bad for her, but..."

"It's not that," I insisted. "And yeah, I've considered that my presence might stand out, but I've got wards up enhancing my usual basekit." Besides, she was a little wrong... thanks to the communal wards, mages that I'm actively investigating in my capacity as a Warden do tend to have a little perceptual blindness around me and sometimes are unable to recognize me by sight, even if they think they should know better. At least at a distance. It's not something that can be counted on 100%, just one of the many small buffers that help me do my job,, and something I can juice up deliberately when it's important, to tail someone who's actively on the lookout for me. "I just need to wrap this up fast. There's only so long I can investigate a suspected Nobody before the Council gets involved, and I'd rather not have them take over my investigation."

"I don't get what their big hate-on is for Nobodies anyway. I mean sure, I get that this guy's looking pretty sus, with the harvesters and secret messages and all, but... in general, maybe someone just wants a clean break from all their baggage, you know?"

"Any threat they can't see coming, can't attempt to track and control in advance, has got to terrify them," I pointed out. "For all they know any Nobody who pops up could be a rival council member they've completely forgotten, who knows all their procedures and has a serious grudge. Once someone's crossed that line, they've also pretty much got nothing left to lose."

"I guess." She didn't sound like she believed it, maybe because certain other transformations were similarly banned.

"I think the Council fear anybody who's willing to sacrifice that much for their goals, you know? Because fundamentally, they aren't. A little pain, a little blood, sure, but mostly, now that they're in a good position, they want to protect what they have, and they fear change and anybody willing to make too much of it." Not just the Council, either... sure there's a few rules that are just about banning things that shock the conscience, but really, much of the Accords is about preventing large scale shifts to reality or the memories or free will of other mages, or assembling the power base that would make that unstoppable. Mage society's all based on the tacit agreement that it's fine to use magic to get what you want, as long as you don't overly intrude on the status quo everybody else is more-or-less happy with. "Nobodys are just a particularly horrifying example of that, because it means their own memories might have been violated."

"But you're still not sure this is a Nobody, right?"

"Not 100%, no."

"I might have a way to find out. Had a little brainstorm this morning" She leaned over to yoink her handbag from the edge of the couch, pulled out a pair of sunglasses and put them in my hands. They were the kind with an iridescent mirrored coding to assure you it's really blocking out those UV rays, but on closer inspection, after turning them over a few times, I found the markings of wizardry, a network of scratches put on the inside lens with some kind of sharp object. A pattern, that looked like one of those wireframe doodles of cubes where you could choose to see each side as either in front of or behind the other, except missing a few of the outer lines. "A Nobody detector." She grabbed another mini-donut and shoved it in her mouth.

"Wait, really?"

Haley swallowed just enough of what was in her mouth to be able to get the words out in a more-or-less understandable way. "Untested, but it might work." She shrugged, finished the bite and continued, more clearly, "Technically it's more of a non-Nobody detector. I remembered what you said about you not being able to message Nobodies directly, and I thought, well, that seems like the kind of thing you could exploit. So these, when you've got somebody in your sights, you unfocus your eyes a little and tap the top edge, right here...." She pointed it out. "...and the glasses will attempt to send a preset message to whoever's right in the convergence. The message is actually of zero length though, so it doesn't really perturb the universe much. The other party shouldn't even feel it, and the cost is therefore super low--the scratches might extend, you'll feel just a bit of queasiness--but if they can't receive a message, it fails before it even gets that far, no pain, no sick feeling, because nothing got sent." I stared at it, uncomprehending. Well, the general concept of it made perfect sense, once explained, but before that, I doubt I'd even could conceive of the idea of asking Gnarly to send a message with zero length, much less making an item that did it. A message was a message, and if it wasn't experienced, it wasn't actually a message. At least, to me. But often our own biases and preconceptions come into play, and I could see the value of Haley's off-kilter way of thinking. It made a certain kind of sense... a little like those old movies where a criminal or spy or homewrecker need to find out if someone's home, so they phone the landline... and if it rings, they hang up or pretend it's a wrong number, and that might be a little suspicious... but if they get a busy signal they know someone absolutely is there without leaving any evidence they even tried..

"At least that's the theory. I wouldn't rely too much on it. Who knows, maybe part of the Nobody's deal is they're aware of attempts to message them even if they're unsuccessful. Though if true they could exploit that as a limited messaging tool in itself. So I think it's safe. The main danger is if it doesn't work at all, which again, until we have a Nobody to test it on is a possibility. I assume if you've got more than one person in the sights when you activate it'll send to the non-Nobody, path of least resistance and all, but I can't say for sure... there's also a risk that some non-Nobody mages MIGHT sense a messaging attempt, even with zero length. I could. Could you? I did try these babies on you from when I saw you through the window." I shook my head. I like to think that maybe if I really stilled my mind and paid attention, I'd have noticed something, but my attention was on other things... and the same would be true of most mages. The bigger worry would be if they noticed the scratches and were on heightened alert knowing something magic might be in play, but the mirrored coating made it difficult to see from the outside. "I wouldn't go crazy testing people though, every non-Nobody you test will degrade it, and sooner or later..."

"You'll have to make a new one from scratch," I finished. "Thanks." I tried to sound impressed, even though I wasn't sure I should use it even if I found the guy I was looking for. It was a bit of a double-edged sword. Once I was sure I was dealing with a Nobody, as I said, I'd be obligated to report it. That's not a geas, itself, just a rule... but a rule important enough that ignoring it would come out when I next had to make a formal attestation, which was required of me on a regular basis. I should have had to make one before the last Council Meeting, to give them the opportunity to question my motives and loyalty, but since it was set up in a hurry they just couriered me the coin I used on the roads instead of making me give an attestation to collect it. In any event, I still would have been able to attest then, with no issues, since I hadn't, in my own judgment, absolutely confirmed the theory. If I knew for sure, and the Council later learned about my discovery of a Nobody--when I next attested or through some other way--and they decided that I'd failed to report it promptly enough, it wouldn't be good. It was something that, theoretically, the Council could remove me for... but given there wasn't a backup Warden already in play, more likely a lesser punishment would be handed out. Mages are inherently rule-breakers and -benders, and Wardens are no exception, so there's some tolerance of low-level violations as long as the geases I took to become a Warden remain intact. There might be a temporary reduction in my monthly stipend or a Council-chosen shadow assigned to me, all of which would suck... but perhaps the bigger issue was definitional. Not reporting a Mandatory Report category might be forgivable, but it also meant that my investigation ipso facto was not part of my Warden duties, no longer considered 'official' by the communal magic... and thus my Warden protections would rapidly and significantly weaken until I informed the Council to give them the oversight they demanded. It might be better to leave myself that uncertainty... yet having more information was better than not, so, I pulled out my protective case and opened it, took out the taped-together glasses I had in there before.

"What's that?" She was eating another donut.

There was no sense in denying that it was magical, even if Haley didn't sense it herself, the mere fact that they were damaged screamed that to any mage. "Nothing big. They're for keeping myself off cameras when I need to. But I have some gum that does the same thing..." On my way back from the Council meeting I stopped by a mage bar and purchased a couple packs of the horrible stuff. It probably wasn't going to work until I had my taste back, but I couldn't have much more time on my sentence, and having a Nobody detector would be more valuable. "So I don't really need these..."

"Still work?" I nodded. "Can I have them then?"

"Why?"

"I was thinking... if whoever set the Harvesters is on staff they might watch security feeds to see if anyone's paying too close attention, so if I wanted to take a real close look at them on Monday, it might be smart not to leave evidence. If you've got some extra gum that works too, but I figured if you're throwing these out anyway..." I was planning on keeping them in a bag or pocket, unprotected, which would probably very quickly destroy the enchantment just from too much jostling, rather than throw them out entirely, but it amounted to the same thing, and logically it might be better if someone I was working with got use out of them than to just let that happen.

That did leave me with another quandry to consider, though, more risks to weigh against each other. Any item you've handled enough, in the hands of another mage, could at least theoretically be the basis of a location-tracking spell. Usually, just one ping once per item, but, if it works, that kind of information, at the right time, could be devastating. Now, a prospective magical stalker would need something more than say a discarded glass you've drunk from, or a napkin you've used... it has to either be a thing you've used regularly or something you've got a strong emotional attachment to (and even better if it's a symbol of the connection both of you share), but if you're a mage, an item you enchant would absolutely count, even if it's otherwise trash. You still put some pain into crafting it and so there's much more resonance than even a favorite t-shirt you got seeing your favorite band for the first time. One magic item can usually be used for location spells multiple times. Of course, there are ways to sanitize things you craft, like stripping the metadata from a photo you took on your phone, but I hadn't thought to do it when I created this tool, and by now the glasses were fragile enough that the enchantment wouldn't survive the attempt, so I had to weigh the risks of my impulse to be generous. Haley had warned me about getting sloppy, and maybe this was going to be an example of that.

The other way, incidentally, doesn't work as well... if you give someone an item, it would have to have an aura slapped on it, or otherwise be specifically enchanted for the express purpose of tracking it, otherwise you couldn't lock onto it from afar. Well, to be fair, like many things, I say you can't do with magic, you possibly could, but the price most patrons historically demand for such attempts would be prohibitive. And, again, there are also ways to sanitize items given to you even if they are enchanted, and the Warden protections, fuelled by sacrifices from the mage population, would do that automatically for me assuming I followed the anonymizing protocols on my way home, which I would. Of course, you're almost always more vulnerable when you're giving something from yourself rather than just accepting a gift from someone else. Maybe, I should have just given her some gum.

Still, just then, it seemed excessively paranoid. We were working together, and the reason she gave made sense to me. Even if the glasses eventually fell into the wrong hands, I didn't think anyone would be able to find me at home, which was more protected, and out in the world I was usually wearing active wards. It felt like I could afford a little trust. I slid it over the table towards her. "Sure. Knock yourself out."

"Thanks." The last mini-donut went into her mouth, was quickly chewed and swallowed, and she dusted off her hands. "Okay. the chocolate is gone, and it was fuelling most of my interest in being around people, so I'm going to need to say good night soon. It's been a long day. Before I officially start my vacation, is there anything else we need to deal with that can't be done over text?" I couldn't think of anything, so got up to leave, thanked her for her time. "Seriously, Galahad. Work-life balance, think about it. Carve out some time for yourself, even if it means drawing the case out a little longer... and, if the Council gets involved, handles this for you, it might not be such a bad thing either. It means you can spend time with your star, instead of just orbiting."

"Yeah, maybe," I agreed. "I'll think about it." But I didn't really mean it. In fact, while it looked like she was going to bed, it was still remarkably early, both objectively and by my own body clock which lost about an hour, and I had more things I could do.

Once I left Haley to her rest, I took a brief stop at home to change and pick up a bit more protection, because Haley had made a good point about being recognized. Not that I hadn't thought about it before, but it reminded me I had another tool in my toolbox to help, my old class ring that I'd enchanted for Allie when she was Alicia. I'd tested and found the 'Don't Notice Me' effect my mentor was responsible for had been weakened, but it was still in play... probably because my own magical contribution was buoying it up, even after Liz's death. The protection would also work on me, give me an extra layer of anonymity, keeping eyes from lingering, minds from thinking about me. And, if I felt an appropriate moment, I could try to give it to Allie again. Strictly for some short-duration protection. I wouldn't risk exiling her to the background of life long-term, if there was any chance that's what I did before, but for a few days, for the instant notification I would get if she felt in danger while wearing it, it might be potentially worth it. Mostly, though, I wanted it for my own use... I wasn't planning on seeing Allie right away anyway.

Instead, I headed back towards Campus and visited the Attic again. It was the last place I'd physically seen my target, and even Nobodys can have habits. I waited at the bar until a free table opened up in a corner, with good sight lines, and moved there, watching for anyone I recognized and--maybe a little--hoping for Allie to just show up as well. While I waited, I called on Gnarly for a price check and decided it reasonable. I'd already flagged down a waitress for a plate of wings that I was going to leave untouched--just so nobody assumed the table was free if I had to leave for a minute--and when it arrived I asked for a glass of water. Once I got that, I drank half of it, and when nobody was looking, poured the remainder of my beer inside to fill it up again. A minute later, again when I didn't feel any eyes on me, I tore open and added the contents of a packet of hot sauce I had in a pocket, then took salt and pepper from the table and put a light dusting on top, like I was suddenly inspired to make some kind of extremely shitty Michelada and only half-remembered the recipe. The next ingredient was not a good tomato juice substitute, aside from adding a little more color. I worked my bloodletting knife out of my pocket, drew the edge along my belly the smallest amount I could manage to draw blood, and then once I felt the sting that signalled I'd succeeded, covered the wound with a quarter from my pocket, smearing my blood on it. This part would normally require more sleight of hand, if there wasn't a table in the way that would block what I was doing from anybody who happened to glance my way, because if anyone saw what I'd done, they wouldn't just think I was someone with bad taste in drinks, they'd have reason to question my mental health, and I wouldn't blame them.

None of what we do for our magic is particularly recommended, and that less than most. I know non-mages sometimes cut themselves for an illusory sense of control, or to to feel alive or for some relief from other pain they're feeling, but nobody cuts for those reasons and then just lucks into it being magical... what mages do is built on a preexisting connection to an extra-dimensional godlike entity that has already noticed them and enjoys feeding off pain and sacrifice. That particular spell would be even more objectively foolish for a non-mage to attempt. My knife's treated to be sterile but the coin certainly wasn't, and pressing it, and all the filth it had accumulated, up against an open wound is not something anyone should do unless they're actually a mage with a firm guarantee from their patron that it won't lead to tetanus or some other infection. Even attempting to do it as a a cantrip--that is, going through the same steps later in the hopes it lets you repeat the magic, drawing on your connection to the patron's power but without their direct attention--would risk that... but here, thanks to the negotiation, I knew Gnarly was looking out for me. Accepting my blood and pain and psychological discomfort into their greedy metaphysical tentacles was on the agenda, but seriously harming one of their pets was not, so I only had to get over my natural revulsion for the contact. Once I felt the blood crust up (more quickly than it would have if I was doing this purely because of inner turmoil), I palmed the quarter and dropped it in the glass then, as I wiped the knife clean, finally mumbled the words that had appeared in my mind along with the burning pain of skin breaking, to complete the spell.

I was half-sure it was all overkill anyway, but better over than under. I already had tools in play, to alert me to active scrying attempts, for example, but this was like a watered-down version of what was at the Council meeting, and I liked that extra reassurance. Until the glass got disturbed, gazing into it would give me a little snapshot, snitching on magical effects in the room. Not everything.... probability alteration might slip by, as well as spells that exclusively went on in the caster's head, and preexisting passively enchanted items like Harvesters or my own tools wouldn't light up, but it should pick up any new enchantments as well as anything that might be classified as 'vulgar' if anyone noticed it... even if nobody actually did. For example, if I walked through a wall while a crowd was watching, it would require me to sacrifice a lot more than if I did it in secret... but it's still near-vulgar enough by its very nature, violating the rules our reality functions under, that another mage doing it, even unseen, would create metaphysical reverberations that I might not be able to sense, but would show up in a magically-created sensor like my drink. Of course, the bigger the area, the more a sensor like this would cost, scaling up exponentially (I bet Allie would tell me I was using that word wrong, but I don't mean in a precise mathematical sense), so although it would be incredibly useful if I could do this for the whole campus, the most I could realistically manage, and for only a short period of time, was the main room of the building. It wouldn't pick up anything in the store above, or even anything behind a closed door, but the grains of pepper clinging to the surface outlined a rough video-game-style mini-map of the restaurant's floor plan that I could check on now and then and see if there were any disturbances.

I wasn't really expecting anything, so settled in for a long night, paying more attention to the faces of the customers than my drink, looking of course for the specific man I thought was a Nobody but also for anyone who showed any of the sometimes-contradictory-and-thoroughly-circumstantial non-conclusive signs that traditionally make me wonder if someone could be a mage I'd never heard of... obvious wounds, whether fresh or healed-over scars, clothes that have fresh rips, using possessions that were obviously damaged or more expensive than they needed to be, or their figures matching some kind of physical body shape ideal. A lot of people have some of those signs, and even all of them together proves nothing at all, but it's a starting point for more attention. I spent some time watching an athletic guy on crutches, who probably was just a normal guy who sprained or broke something, but when he glanced my way as he ambled towards the men's room, I flicked my eye to my glass so I wasn't obviously staring at him... and saw what looked like an errant reflection. Except, to move the way it did, there would have to be some kind of firefly on the ceiling,

It wasn't moving in time to the guy on crutches, but was almost certainly matching the movements of someone else in the Attic, and I figured out from the position that whatever it represented was heading towards to the bar, not the restroom. I saw a woman just coming up and waiting for the bartender's attention, and without even checking the glass again, I was sure it was her that corresponded to the glint in my glass. If I was wrong, her presence here at the same time would be such a big a coincidence that I'd have to consider that she might be a mage herself, and I certainly didn't want to think that. I'd shared a table with her the last time I was at the Attic, and I assumed at the time she was an innocent bystander. She probably still was. What the glass picked up wasn't exactly the kind of thing mages do to themselves, by choice, generally speaking.

At any rate, it wasn't something I could afford to ignore, either. Because the woman waiting her turn at the bar was my sister's friend Vani and I couldn't think of a single innocuous reason for her to be walking around with a magical aura on her right now.

Chapter 17

An aura's a little like attaching a hashtag to a social media post. I mean, there are tricks you can do with them if you know enough, but mainly it makes it easier for the magic of our patrons to latch on and find something again easily at a distance, despite the sea of other information they might have to sort through. Which, again, they could do if motivated enough, but more difficulty means more cost, and I guess searching a planet full of billions of functionally identical small animals for the exact one your pet is interested in (not to mention if you need to find one particular instance of an object in a world of mass production) is like searching 'sex' on the Internet and digging through the results to find the one spicy scene you were looking for. Or maybe like reading every message posted on all social media looking hoping to spot reviews of the restaurant you want to go to. If you know there's a relevant hashtag, it's much easier, because there might be only a couple thousand auras on the planet at a given time. In this way, auras are the basis of the cheapest tracking techniques, discounted not just because attaching one to a target narrows down the search area but also because they don't last long without being refreshed... a couple days on living things, maybe twice that on objects with high structural integrity. Need to stalk someone longer than that? You're better off enchanting an item with the ability to report its location back to the caster and planting that on your target, but that takes effort too, and, mostly, slapping an aura on something is cantrip level stuff once you've asked your patron to do it a few times. And having a firm sense of location is usually the first step to casting other spells on people from afar. If you can't afford to find them, affecting them is usually way out of your sacrificial price range, too. One of the few spells it's worth casting on someone from afar without finding them first is a directly-addressed message spell, which, for some reason, get a pass on inconvenience costs, possibly because they're almost exclusively used mage-to-mage and, as they inspire the other mage to sacrifice a little pain to reply, our patrons make that easy... at least, that's the best theory I've heard, though there's also one about all our minds being directly connected in ways our physical bodies aren't, at least at the level of observation the Outer Gods have. Whatever the case, long-distance spells, in general, are usually ridiculously expensive themselves--at least ones with any bite--but if you want to know where to scry or teleport to in order to catch up with someone, for example, putting an aura on them is a good way to start... at least, if your target is anyone other than another mage. It's relatively easy for us to pick up on auras on our person, so 'enchanted tracking object' is the best approach there. We can also test for such durable enchantments and wipe them, but that requires more of a deliberate effort, and so there's a better chance of slipping something past a target who's got other things on their mind.

Vani hadn't seen me, thanks both to my position and the class ring around my neck, and so I rose from the table and started in the direction of the bar. Taking my glass with me would mean breaking the enchantment, so I left it behind, but once I got closer I'd be able to use some simple cantrips to divine whether the aura was on her or someone she was standing near, or maybe something she carried. On my way, I noticed her face was... harder, like she was scowling, not with her face but just with her eyes, her body language. She slapped her money down on the table and grabbed her drink just as I pressed my amulet into my breastbone hard enough to trigger the magic I needed to confirm the aura was on her, personally. That meant Vani wasn't secretly a mage, then, at least probably (yes, mages sometimes put auras on themselves, for various reasons, but they're almost all rather esoteric and specialized). It was still deeply troubling that somebody did this to her in the last couple days, considering she was part of my sister's social circle. Coincidences do happen, but it was hard not to read the tactic as an end-run around me, keeping tabs on Allie in a way a Warden might miss. I'd be looking for auras on my sister, obviously, but checking everyone who interacted with her regularly was another matter. Putting one on a friend would still let someone, loosely, keep tabs on Allie and get good potential scrying locations, especially if he knew they were going to reconnect later.

I wasn't sure what I was going to do, all I knew was I wanted to ask her some questions, so I maneuvered myself into her path and faked that I just saw her. "Oh, hey. Vani, right?"

Her eyes narrowed, trying to place me, proving I'd made less of an impression than I thought, but finally she said, hesitantly. "Calvin?"

I nodded, let some of my concern show on my face. "Bad night?" The music was loud enough that she just looked confused, so I rose my voice, repeated my question.

Her mouth twitched as she weighed whether she wanted to let it out. "Bad date."

"What, with Eric?"

Now the scowl returned. "He doesn't own me, you know."

That was interesting. Could this other date have put an aura on her? I had to know, but I wasn't sure how to go from there, especially with how she snapped at me. It felt like the right move was to back off, not look too interested. "Sorry. Just got the impression you two were..."

She sighed. "It's complicated." After a sip of her drink, the music had quieted a little, and I heard her say, "I just thought..." A shake of her head indicated it wasn't something she wanted to pursue right now. "Anyway, suffice to say, I needed a drink." I remembered she wasn't drinking at all last time around, but maybe that was because she knew she had schoolwork to do later. Tonight must be an easier night. "What brings you here?"

"Was in the area and needed a quick dinner," I lied. Lying didn't bother me that much when it wasn't someone I particularly cared about... it was all part of the job. "But I did order way too big an order of hot wings if you feel like taking some off my hands."

"Seriously?" I wasn't really the smoothest guy in the world with respect to social interactions, but it didn't seem that outrageous an offer to make to someone. Maybe because I'd only had one conversation with her. I gave a little half shrug. "I probably should eat, or this is liable to go to my head." She raised her glass. I couldn't tell what it was, just that it was red and had ice. "But this isn't you trying to get something going, is it?"

"Just a friendly offer," I promised. "I'm not really interested in creating drama and... maybe you and Eric aren't together but I get the feeling it'd lead to that anyway. But I'm certainly not going to eat the whole plate. If you're not hungry... well, nice seeing you again, but I need to eat." As much as I wanted answers, pestering her, even by pressing a 'friendly offer' too hard, wasn't going to get them for me.

She made a nod just shy of being too faint for me to pick up on it being an agreement, and I led the way back to the table, pushed the wings so they were more central to the table, grabbed some napkins for the bones, and took one to nibble on. Still tasteless, but protein is protein and they at least they gave my numb tongue a little zing from the capsaicin. Vani was more hesitant, but finally grabbed one and took a bite. "They're not even warm. This place, I swear..." That was my fault, though, I'd ordered them long enough ago and left them sitting out, so they were just about room temperature. If I didn't need to sell the idea that I was hungry, I'd probably have left them the whole night, just so the waitstaff, under the assistance of my class ring, would keep seeing me as 'customer who is nowhere near finished' and not bother me... but I did need to eat, even if I lacked the appetite. Vani finished her experimental wing and complained, "And hardly hot at all. Like, 'white person hot' maybe."

As a white person, I didn't take offence, but I did feel the need to point out, "I have had much stronger." She took another, proving my offer of food was a brilliant move in retrospect, she must not have reached the 'dinner' stage of the date.

I was about to ask about it, see if I could tease out a name, when she preempted me. "So where have you been keeping yourself, Cal? I thought you were interested in us at the Tabletop Club, but I haven't seen you drop by once. Or was it you've only ever been interested in one of us?" I froze there, nonplussed, and a wicked grin formed on her face. "I'm teasing. Lyssa said you'd been super busy with labs and stuff."

That was part of the reason the question threw me... because it implied that Allie hadn't told her friends that she'd personally forbidden me from showing up. Club room's for real students only. By implication, that suggested she hadn't mentioned any of what she'd ferreted out, either, the private eye stuff, the fact that I was only auditing, or the suspicious backstory involving a sister that appeared in no records. Vani's latest words and casual tone seemed to confirm that. I wasn't sure how to reconcile Allie not wanting me to join her club under false pretenses with her also keeping it all secret. Even if she didn't broadcast my business to everyone, surely she'd tell her good friends the real reason she thought I was here, wouldn't she? "I have been busy. Mostly research, though." In case Vani was laying a trap to see if I'd lie to her, too, I could claim technical truth.

Vani didn't seem interested in pursuing the point though, which suggested genuine ignorance that I wasn't really a pre-med student. "Well, feeding the best friend is a good strategy, I'll admit, but I don't roll over that easy. You won't get any secrets about Alyssa from me." Her gaze was playful, still teasing, and clearly still wrapped up in the idea that I was romantically interested in Allie. "Not for the price of a few hot wings."

"Then I won't ask," I promised. Any other coincidental encounter, I probably would have, but I had more important issues, and pretending to heed her warning gave me the excuse to pivot the topic, "So, how bad was this date? Did he get weirdly handsy or something?" If so, it might have been to put an aura on her. You can do it via line of sight but physical contact is cheaper, easier, and subtler to other mages in the area.

"No. Just... he seemed like a nice guy in class but the more we talked the more he came out with this misogynistic crap and like... I'm just so tired of that."

"Don't have that problem with Eric?"

"I mean, he has his issues, but, he's mostly pretty good. We're not serious, though." Her eyes flashed from her food to me, like she realized she was in a risky situation and suddenly spooked about it. "I probably shouldn't be saying anything, since this is probably all going to get back to him..."

"I don't know why you'd assume that. I don't know him any better than I know you. I haven't even seen him since that game night." Well, once, from a distance I think, but we didn't talk.

"Yeah, but you're both guys, so... sooner or later."

"We're not all in a union, and I don't make a habit of betraying confidences. Is this other date a secret you're keeping from him or something?"

"No, he'll probably hear about it. We're not exclusive. He won't care."

I wasn't so sure about that, from the way he'd talked about her. Maybe when he said she'd get mad if he talked to other girls, he was just projecting. Though, she did sound the faintest bit disappointed at the notion that he wouldn't care. It could be Vani took the date trying to spark jealousy... but it wasn't my problem, as much as I might root for them in another context, if we were all just friends. "Well, I've still got no reason to mention your date with... wait, what was this guy's name?"

Again, the narrow-eyed suspicious look. "Why?"

"Just sounds like someone else I know. Kind of know, anyway. He's in the tech side of things too. His name's... Terry? Tommy? Timmy?" I watched her eyes, looking for recognition, but didn't notice any reaction to any of those names my sister had provided as possibles. "Something like that. Real shy guy but once you get him to open up it's all this incel crap. Just wondered if he was the same guy."

"No, definitely different guy. But I'm sure there's no shortage." And that didn't mean she didn't pass by the Nobody without realizing it, or run into whoever he was working with. She took some more of her drink and then said, "Sam's more smooth and confident but then his idea of flirting is 'oh, American girls are all such vapid sluts but I can tell you're better than that' which I guess is shades of the same thing."

I nodded, to show I was listening, but I wasn't really being a good listener, I was thinking of how to turn the conversation to find out more about whoever might have cast magic on her... the problem was, how do you do that with someone who didn't even know it happened? As I tried to come up with something, I probably left an awkward enough silence that she tried to fill, both by pulling out her phone and tapping it and, to avoid seeming rude I guess, with a question in my direction. "Why do you have a drink and a beer?"

I glanced at the glass that was in front of me while I sipped my beer from the bottle. The glow of her aura was still the only thing I could see going on. I couldn't explain the magic to her, but I could make something up. "Old tradition when you're drinking alone," I said, and gestured to the glass. "This one's not to be touched, it's for the spirits of death who might see you drinking alone and join your table." I was lowkey looking for any reaction that might betray knowledge of magic.

Instead, Vani snorted. "Expensive tradition."

"Not really, it's a bit of a cheat," I confessed, again baiting. "It's just watered down beer with a bit of a ketchup packet and some other disgusting stuff so I'm not tempted to accidentally drink it." Another mage would probably start to get suspicious here, that there was spellwork involved, but she seemed more like she was indulging a crazy person. "That would offend the spirits."

"You really are superstitious."

"I don't really believe in it, but... sometimes you follow the traditions anyway. Habits. Keeps you from drinking too much, and it brings you closer to your roots." I briefly remembered my father, who refused to let us clink glasses for a toast, because his father wouldn't let him and how I kept up that tradition after his death... not all the time, but mostly, and thought of him every time I did, especially if I had to fumble through explaining the supposed historical reasons why, only vaguely understood but still passed on, like a multi-generational game of broken telephone.

She made a "Hmm," noise that might have been agreement or polite disagreement. "Still sounds pretty superstitious. For your sake I hope Alyssa finds it charming, like your little nickname for her."

I was still thinking of the clinking-glasses thing, and how my sister also kept it up. She wasn't superstitious at all, but I'd seen her also abstain and explain in social settings where it was appropriate. Did that change, or was she never in a situation to clink glasses with Vani? Or did she simply not think it on the same level? Absently, I said, "Nickname?"

"She normally hates when people call her Allie. But somehow you get away with it."

I shrugged, unable to explain our special connection, the history that was now buried but not enough that navigable terrain didn't still rise out of all those layers of instinct. "If it starts bugging her, I promise I'll stop," I assured her.

"I'm just saying, you seem to have good chemistry. As friends," she clarified, which suggested Allie told her that much about where our relationship stood, and that she didn't believe that was the real extent of it for a minute. "So I'll tolerate you too."

It was a joke, and something of a seal of approval, so I played along. "I appreciate that." But I wanted to get the conversation off my sister. "So, doing anything fun for the rest of the weekend, or is there more programming to do?"

"Oh, there's always more programming to do. But this weekend's light. There's a street festival going on, one of Eric's friends is performing there with his band, so we're probably going to check that out tomorrow, you know, provide moral support."

I tried to nod casually, but that got my attention, An outdoor event taking place over a wide area... if you were tracking someone in other ways, it would be easy for one person, even a mage to lose someone... exactly the type of situation having an aura would be useful in. If I heard someone non-magical I was following was going to an event like that, or their friend was, I might do the same. But I still needed to fish for more details... maybe it was just a date. "Just you two?"

"No. There's a few of us going." She looked back up at me from her phone, then a smile broke out on her face. "Allie's supposed to be meeting us there, if that's why you're interested in stopping by. You could just... show up, enjoy some good street food. Maybe you might make her believe in fate."

My heart was already racing, and not because it seemed like everyone was trying to help me hook me up with my sister. A group plan, involving Allie. If the Nobody, the guy who followed Allie through the Estrangement to an entirely new campus, overheard these plans, and put the aura on Vani because of it, it would only make sense to be because wanted to keep tabs on Allie. That didn't mean anything, necessarily... the logic of 'if he hasn't done anything yet, why now?' still applied, By Tuesday I should either have a good lead on my target, or know for sure that he'd gone to ground, and the game would change. I'd tried to avoid thinking about that, but if the Nobody had caught on to me enough to duck out on his usual class, I might need to try and explain to Allie what was going on, just so I could get her to take precautions until I caught him, but... we weren't there yet. It felt more like either he didn't know I was there, or, maybe, were in a phase of mutual cautious circling, mutual uncertainty over whether we'd been spotted. It made sense by now that he might suspect another mage was on the scene, maybe even a Warden, and so be making himself scarce because of that. He was a Nobody, and it was the natural instinct of a criminal to hide from those who could bring him to whatever passed for justice, but the theory was that if he followed my sister through the Estrangement, he shouldn't remember me personally at all, or any grudge he might have held that caused her to insert himself in her life. In that case, if he was plotting some decisive action with a Warden in the area, unless he was really good, he should have tripped one of my own wards with something by now, something small and exploratory as his paranoia overwhelmed him and made him slip up. I've seen it a dozen times, with people breaking the Accords, even some I didn't suspect were breaking them until their probes alerted me. The fact that my only knowledge of him was purely visual had lulled me into some level of comfort.

Yet now there was this random aura, popping up right in my face, here in the last few days, making me paranoid that I'd gotten too comfortable. Why track her friend to a street fair unless there was uncertainty about exactly where they were going to be, and unless knowing the details might matter? This was the home stretch, potentially, where races are won or lost, and with my sister involved, I couldn't afford to sit back and be comfortable. Even if it was unlikely, if there was even a small chance he was planning to make a move, I needed to be there.

I also couldn't show up out of the blue, pretend it was a happy accident. Sure, I took the information about the street fair down from Vani, told her I'd think about it, but I intended it as a last resort, in case I needed to follow them at a distance, magically cloaked in some way. I'd like to be by her side, ready to immediately snap into action if something happened but... Allie was too smart to buy 'just happened to be there,' and even if she didn't call me on it, she would almost certainly consider it another lie from me. Best case scenario, it was one she was charmed by, but with the thin ice I was already on, it felt more likely she'd see it as evidence of stalking behavior. Getting caught watching at a distance would be even worse.

Tailing my sister discreetly or popping up with a flimsy excuse weren't my only options, though... I could just ask her directly if we could hook up--meet, I mean. Allie had already wanted to get together with me this weekend... maybe it was just to discuss the case, but I wasn't entirely blind to the notion that she was interested in more than I was willing to give, more than she'd want if she knew the truths that right now she could never believe even if I told her. Considering I couldn't tell her, taking advantage of that desire felt a little scummy, but at the same time... outside of a few crazy thoughts that my better nature immediately disavowed, I never planned to actually do anything that crossed any lines. Maybe, just for her own good, it wouldn't be such a bad thing to play to that interest and ask her if she wanted to get together. It wasn't actually asking my sister out on a date, even if it seemed like it. My only goal was protecting her.

Of course, I knew I could--probably should--just tell her I was worried she might be in danger, but then I'd need to give her a reason why I thought that, either a lie or too weird a truth to accept, and I wasn't ready for either step. Misleading her about my intentions, with my actions seemed... better, somehow. I don't know. Probably one of those self-deceptions I'm allowed to get away with.

I could convince myself that not being fully honest with Allie was okay, and the self-deceptions, in the way they always are, got pushed down to the back of my mind where I barely had to consider them, but with Vani, I didn't really care that my social overtures were fundamentally deceptive, and for a while I kept them up, trying a couple other conversational gambits/dead-ends where I pretended casual interest in what a Computer Science classes major was like while really seeing if I could sus out when and where she got aura'd, but that's hard to do with someone who's attention is half on their phone and doesn't even know what an aura is. Eventually we finished off the wings and I had nothing to show for it, and nothing else had showed up in my glass, so I said my goodbyes. "Thanks for the free wings," she said, evidently still content to sit there for a little longer. I grabbed the glass, the violent move disturbing the surface tension and completely breaking the enchantment so nobody else might notice any weird reflections in the glass, then dumped a wadded-up napkin in it so no one else might be tempted to drink, and left a ten under the glass as a tip for whoever had to clean it up, and started through the protocols for a safe trip home.

It was only there I pulled out my phone and tried to compose a message. What had seemed, on the ride home, to be a relatively simple proposition, completely stymied me when I actually had the phone in front of me. I stared, trying to summon the right magic words that would let me spend time with the girl who didn't know she was my sister without the offer looking weird.

Inevitably, it was going to be weird, though, on my end at least. Even leaving aside she was my sister. I've probably not straight up asked a girl out, cold, over text, since... my first year of college, maybe? And even that was a rare experience. Granted, I haven't dated much at all the last couple years, but before that I had plenty of dates, looking for someone to share my life with, and, normally, invitations flowed more naturally from existing conversations. If we're already talking about a new movie we're both interested in... hey, why not go see it together Friday? Much easier, much less stress than just coming out of nowhere and asking if someone wants to go out based on little more than a vibe that they might be as interested in you as you are about them. That's the kind of problem even magic can't help you with... at least, not in any healthy way.

I spent like an hour trying to craft an overture that didn't sound creepy, or needy, or horny, gaming out possible replies to each option in my head, but in the end it was simpler than I thought, once I actually took the plunge and got started. "Hey," was my brilliant opener, followed quickly with, "Sorry I couldn't make the meeting. Haley sent me the maps and stuff you worked out." With the cute--but in my mind unnecessary--code names for exits. "But I'm free tomorrow if you want to get together or something."

I sent that near midnight, feeling a bit shitty for the late hour, but it was a Saturday night and her finding the messages in the morning might work in my favor, if I could get it all out and lay the proposal in front of her. No such luck. While I was still working on the next part, an offer of something specific, she proved that she hadn't turned her phone off or gone to sleep and in fact was quick with a reply. "I'm planning on checking out a street festival tomorrow," she sent. "We could get together there, if you wanted. Hang out a bit."

That was really Plan B, for me. I'd be happy to be by her side, wherever, but it seemed to me the best option was to skip the street fair entirely, since that's where she was expected to be, and yet... it was hardly a firm commitment. If whoever was tracking Vani didn't find Allie with her tomorrow, even if he'd planned to do more than watch, there'd be no opportunity, and most likely they would just assume plans fell through. If her absence spooked him into scrying, my words would pick something up. So I needed to pitch another option. "I was thinking something a little more private," I sent, mostly hoping she assumed I wanted to talk about the case in secret, but also aware she might think I just wanted a more intimate setting, and--maybe a little--also enjoying the idea for itself. Mostly, though, I'd do anything to get her away from a dangerous situation. "Maybe we could grab dinner or something... or, IDK see a movie. My treat."

"I'd like that," was her response, but before I got too happy, she added a "but" and then, after shortly after, "I did kind of promise I'd show up. One of the guys in my D&D group..." She might have typed it DND, I don't remember, but after a bit more of a delay than I'd expect from if she was just tapping this all out as an extended stream of thought, she added, "His boyfriend's in a band and it's their first real gig. He made us all promise to come, so I don't want to just cancel."

"That's cool."

"But if you wanted to meet there, we could peel off after, grab a bite to eat, and... IDK, do something. Just the two of us."

Do something. Just the two of us. If there wasn't dangerous mages potentially lurking about stalking her, I might be obligated to pull away, or at least make it clear that we were only getting together as friends, with no expectations of anything more, or that it was strictly business and I'd only offered to pay because she was helping me with my job and I could write it off as an expense. Either of those might cool her expectations a little, but also give her second thoughts about getting together at all... and getting my sister away from any potential danger made stringing her along seem like the lesser sin, for the moment. So I just told her, "Sure... sounds good."

I had my justifications lined up in my head, that I was only being ruthlessly pragmatic in finding a way to watch out for Allie, but still, when I actually read my sister's response, I couldn't deny the confused, dizzying set of feelings it gave me. All at once it was like I was both proud and ashamed of myself at the same time, and also sick, and genuinely pleased and even a little excited for what might come next. I tried to dismiss them, tell myself the positive feelings were just from the pleasure of being good at your job--even if what your job requires is being deceptive and manipulative for a good cause--and that rush of excitement was just nerves, the danger, but it rang hollow. I'm usually pretty good at lying to myself if I need to avoid an uncomfortable truth, but this time, a rogue thought escaped containment and my required honesty compels me to admit it here, too. For a few minutes, staring at the screen of the phone, I found myself wondering whether I'd have the same feelings if there wasn't a Nobody on the loose and I still got this reply from my sister who didn't know she was my sister, confirming, "Then it's a date."

Then, of course, I pushed those questions and feelings back in the hole they shouldn't have escaped from, because I still had work to do.

Chapter 18

As much as I'd have liked to spend the whole day with Allie, watching her back, I knew I was on the edge of a line that I could too slip over, and whether the other side of that line was making my overtures seem too explicitly romantic or just freaking her out with appearing too clingy, either way, I felt it best not to cross. Instead, I followed her lead about the schedule of Sunday without much pushback. That meant not picking her up, but rather meeting her there, in the late afternoon, as she suggested. I told myself it would probably be okay. From what I knew about my sister, Sunday mornings were usually lazy affairs anyway, if she could manage it, sleeping in, perhaps working on a project or maybe doing some writing or research on her fantasy novel, but having no real interest in leaving the house or even changing into proper clothes without a good reason. That was what it was like in our teen years when we lived together, and even after, sometimes. Once in a while, she'd crash on my couch and just hang around well into the afternoon. Of course, as a college student, there was a good chance she had work to do this Sunday as well, and maybe her roommate having a one-night co-star for her OnlyFans still lurking around might inspire her to find somewhere outside to do that, but I imagined her holed up in her apartment... or maybe just her room, until she was almost ready to go out anyway. That didn't mean she was safe from some kind of magical intrusion, but, again, if not before, why be paranoid now?

Of course, I was paranoid, because of that aura, I just kept it in check. I think. Okay, I set up a scrying position on the hallway outside her apartment door, which might have been a bit overprotective. I wasn't willing to look inside without some firm suspicion something was wrong, but the hallway seemed prudent, if expensive... I'd be paying an extra cost to do it without physically visiting the site first and also by making it sensitive to auras as well. This time, that sacrifice left my right knee in so much pain I needed a cane to hobble around my apartment, but when I made the deal Gnarly assured me most of the pain would fade the moment I shattered the mirror I was using to anchor the spell on my end, so I thought it was worth it. I was wrong, and I suffered for absolutely nothing. Sure, it was just one of many pains that morning, as I stocked up on wards and enchanted items just in case things went bad, but most of those were either financial hits or short, sharp pains for a brief bloodletting, and I could do a lot of that in a seated position while keeping an eye on the mirror for anybody out of place or too interested in her door. Still, every time I had to fetch something expensive to sacrifice, or go to the bathroom or feed Smokey or when the grey beast just decided my lap was the spot to be on, I cursed my own overprotectiveness, as figurative jagged shards of broken glass bounced around in my kneecap with every jostle, while the hallway showed almost no activity, and pretty soon I dreaded having to walk a street festival later... even if the active source of the pain would vanish by then, sometimes aches linger.

All that mirror ever gave me (besides my own worries I was being creepy) was a look at her roommate for the first time. This was around eleven, when she went out, lingering in the doorway for a few seconds to finish a conversation or say goodbye to--I imagined--Allie before finally turning towards the scrying point, ignorant as she walked past it down the hall. I didn't see what the big deal was... I mean, she was attractive, certainly, with some well-done but not flashy makeup on her face, and dressed in reasonably flattering clothes that were casual and covered enough that you wouldn't otherwise suspect she had an OnlyFans. I'd have had to guess whether that was her ordinary outdoor look or if she was possibly was visiting family for a Sunday dinner or something and going more conservative, but either way, from the way Allie described guys getting weird and thirsty when they found out about her roommate, I expected more. Honestly I couldn't imagine guys even noticing the roommate when Allie was right there and they already had her attention, much less ruining any shot by being thirsty for a roommate they hadn't met, unless the mere fact of her being an adult performer was all of the allure... and for how many people could that be the case?

I guess there were no enthusiastic co-stars that night, because the roommate was the only one I saw leave, and nobody approached the room either, or and the mirror might as well have been a static painting of a doorway, until I finally saw Allie, safe and sound, on my scry, leaving for some pre-fair errands and, thankfully, aura-free. Knowing that was likely to be the last I saw of her until later, I smashed the mirror to let my knee rest up while I finished up the last of what I was working on, then took a shower, dressed up and geared up, then headed out the door myself.

What I could find about the event online wasn't entirely clear about parking anyway, so I left my car behind and, since it was technically still an official--albeit independent--Warden investigation, followed best practices and took indirect public transit routes that only eventually circled back to my real destination. That's far more important when returning home than going somewhere, but as long as I could still attest to the Council in good conscience, taking the long way would imbue me with some benefits in exchange for the time and inconvenience and annoyance, one of the chief being additional defenses against both magical and mundane infiltration of electronics. A greater alertness of the former in my area, and as for the latter, it included an advancement Liz and some of the other Wardens petitioned the Council to add, to keep up with the times, tapping the pool of collective magic tithed to keep the system in place. Basically, it surrounded me with a field where outside attempts to gather data electronically would tend to get a little scrambled with garbage data. High-density information streams like video and audio tend to still make it through unmolested but location data especially gets mangled shortly after use, and so does a lot of text. The most obvious result is there's usually a vast disconnect between what people near me search for and what tracking algorithms recorded them searching for, but it gives false data to spyware, too. Of course, in order to remain non-vulgar, phones and such in the area still need to work, and that means it can't be perfect, most of the scrambling happening on intermediate steps in the data chain, and after the fact, which leaves plenty of little gaps people can still spy through, particularly when someone's doing some Hardison-style shit and monitoring a phone's output in real time. Still, advertisers hate that one weird trick. If you've ever wondered why Amazon suddenly thinks you you might want to buy Raggedy Ann and Andy hand puppets or Star Wars themed fetishware or something else you've never expressed any interest in ordering, it might just be because a Warden who had to take the bus was in your vicinity. Or maybe you've just got weird friends and your phone was snooping on conversations for the sake of capitalism, which is a thing too.

The long, rambling journey I needed to take in order to charge all this extra protection up was going to eat up a fair bit of extra time, but that didn't really matter, as I already planned to show up significantly earlier than I was supposed to meet Allie and the others anyway, and arrived with hours to spare, to get an idea of the lay of the land.

Hours to spare before I was supposed to meet Allie, that is, but the street fair itself was already in progress. Metal barricades blocked off the street to vehicles but allowed people to walk easily around and, within the boundaries, freely walk the road inside. The edges of the street were lined with stalls where people sold food or crafts or wares from local stores, some of them not quite ready for operation when I'd arrived, but others already catering to the people walking by. Most of those attractions were at the sides, leaving the middle of the road walkable, but every so often something popped up in center of things, usually under a big awning. Many of these were games or other attractions for people with kids, like a bouncy house they must have towed to different events every week the weather was nice enough to support it, though one seemed dedicated to passing out bottles of water from some sponsor to the crowd. I'm not sure I'd actually have called it a crowd, just then, but there was at least a fair amount of foot traffic, enough that if I carried an enchanted staff to focus my spells like they do in some books (or a hockey stick from one not-particularly-faithful adaptation of a favorite series I tracked down that... well, it tried), as often as not I wouldn't be able to swing it around me without hitting somebody. Not that I'd be inclined to, as I didn't see anyone I'd needed to hit. Those around me mostly seemed to be families, though also a good number of solo or paired up young people--a few who looked like folks who lived in this neighborhood oblivious to everyone else and any prior advertising and just left their houses or apartments, surprised to find a street festival had just sprung up. Certainly though, there was enough of a crowd that I didn't look out of place, and I imagined it would only get busier as the day went on. The upside of that was that with my wards I was confident that I was unlikely to be spotted even by anyone who knew what I looked like. The downside was it was going to be harder to notice any bad actors, who might also have their own perception-altering magic on, though any blatant effects tried on me should themselves have triggered my wards. I also brought the sunglasses Haley made for me, which I hoped would tilt the search odds even more in my favor... at least, if I saw someone at a distance that looked like they might fit the bill, I could test, even if they were facing away. No one pinged my paranoid radar early on, but then I didn't expect anyone to. Even if someone was following Vani's aura, she wasn't around yet, so after taking a few circuits up and down the length of the festival, and identifying the place where the live music was being performed (it seemed like there were a handful of different live acts I'd never heard of, probably paid in exposure, broken up by recorded stuff) and restroom options, I grabbed a free bottled water before the sponsorship inevitably ran out, picked a quiet shady spot, and sat with earbuds in, alternating between my own musical tastes and an audiobook when I needed a change, while I waited for the time of my date and kept an eye out for any trouble.

The crowd picked up as time rolled by. but still, nothing stood out as being out-of-sorts, nor did any of my wards trigger, and I was starting to convince myself that what I was considering an abundance of caution was in fact an overabundance, but better too much than too little. Allie texted me a few times, verifying that we were still on and then later to direct me to her and her friends, which included Vani and Eric but also a few people I hadn't met and gave a bit of a suspicious internal stink-eye too. Of course, I kept it off my face and just held the genial smile I had on seeing Allie while introduced to everybody. "This is Danny." This was a guy who looked like an overgrown teenager, at least in terms of his frame, tall and gangly and thin, wearing shorts and a dressy shirt that seemed too small for him, not tight, just the cut exposing a lot more arm and stomach that made sense for the style. I'm no fashion expert, of course, but the sleeves were short enough that I wondered why he didn't jut go with a tank top and forgo sleeves entirely. Maybe he liked standing out though, he had short dye-blond hair and sharp features and seemed full of energy, with exaggerated theatrical movements. "Vic." Pale, shorter dude, dark hair just short of being mullet length, and by contrast looking perpetually laid back, like he was used to going under the radar, was comfortable there. He gave a three finger wave while eating some kind of fried dough ball sold at one of the stalls, filled with pork, I think, if it wasn't a vegetarian one. He danced out of the way to avoid some of the sauce dripping on his jeans. "And Raven." Almost as tall as me, taller if you count her wide-brimmed hat, and broad enough that Vic and Danny could probably hide behind her if they were standing side-by-side. One of her arms was covered with tattoos, like a sleeve-in-progress made up of individual images rather than a single unified design. Wearing mostly black on a sunny day was certainly a bold choice albeit one that looked uncomfortable, but I suppose, just as with mages, the goth life requires sacrifices of its own. To be fair, aside from the colors, only the blue-green hair and black fingernail polish really marked her out as potential goth, and I didn't talk to her enough to figure out if she embraced that aesthetic on an everyday basis, but that was my snap first impression.

Mostly, I was using my judgmental first impression powers for threat-assessment. People I'd never met, in Allie's orbit, and any of them theoretically might have been planted there, if the Nobody was assembling a power base and had some weird focus on my sister that persisted through an Estrangement. Maybe all of them were plants, if a cult was involved. Still, although I had to consider the possibility, I wasn't too worried. Danny, once he began talking, I quickly pegged as the one Allie mentioned, whose boyfriend was performing, and thus he was somebody in her D&D game that she'd known a while (or thought she had, since none of her school friends actually extended before the meteor). That didn't rule him out as being involved with the Nobody, or magic, but, if he was, then putting an aura on Vani was superfluous... he invited my sister and knew exactly where they'd all be. Even if everybody split up later, that would be when you put an aura on. If the others were part of the same group, then similar logic made them unlikely collaborators with the aura-caster, but there was a tiny bit more doubt... I mean, one could even be a completely coincidental fledgling mage who put an aura on Vani just so it'd be easier to find where everyone was supposed to meet. Geeks are prone to being recruited for magic, and cults as part of that. Even if they'd known Allie for years (from their perspectives) they still might be working with a Nobody.

In fact, Vic was so blandly average I'd almost have guessed he was a Nobody himself, and if I wasn't convinced Nobodies wouldn't work together, I might have checked him out with my glasses, just to be sure, but if he was a danger, I figured it was a different sort. He seemed to be the type who was recruited by a mage with the promise of power, because he was tired of being looked over. Though again, snap judgments, maybe he was super engaging once you got to know him or on whatever he was passionate about. I wouldn't discount Raven either, because though, yes, there's a tendency for people to mold themselves towards ideal body types when they gain access to eldritch reality-altering magic, that's just an average... mages still come in all shapes and sizes. Plenty of people don't care about their outside appearances, or care but aren't willing to go through the pain that is usually required for body modifications, or are totally happy with the way they look even if assholes sometimes try to change that. Magic can be used to make life more smooth in lots of ways, including punishing people you think are being dicks. Not the only reason I try to be kind to people, even in my Warden duties, but it never hurts to keep Wheaton's Law in mind.

The three newcomers were quickly filed into a 'probably not magical, but watch them just in case' category by the time Eric introduced me. "And this here's Calvin," which got a collective 'Ohh...' that I didn't feel I particularly deserved, and looked to Allie who was compressing her glossy lips into a thin line like holding herself back from saying something and getting a little flush from the effort.

"What a coincidence meeting you here." I thought for a second Vani was trying to push the fate angle she mentioned the other night, despite almost certainly knowing Allie directed me to the meeting, but then I decided she was just being low-key sarcastic for no particular reason.

I gave a casual shrug in response and said, "Seemed like something to do," or some similar remark that downplayed any particular reason I might want to be here, while I confirmed that the aura was still on her... or rather, an aura was within a few feet of me. This particular effect I was employing was entirely binary and didn't reveal an exact location, since I could do that with an easy spell if it became important.

"Well, thanks for coming out, Calvin." Danny said. "I mean, not 'coming out,' which would be tragic if you did right now... when I'm already spoken for. And possibly also for others." He flashed an eye in Allie's direction and a devilish smile before swiftly continuing, "But thanks for showing up, more people is better, but I warn you right now if you don't clap for the music I will track you down and murder you in your sleep." The face broke. "Kidding. Mostly. but please clap and cheer, it's my baby's first big performance for a crowd. And don't tell him I told you to clap either."

"Sure. Okay." That was when I moved him from the 'probably not magical' category to 'unlikely' based on his boyfriend being the reason everyone was here.

"So is there anything to actually do here?" Vic asked.

"There's tons of stuff," Vani said. "There's food..."

"Already got food." He lifted the last bite of the breaded-thing, then popped it in his mouth.

"And all these little stalls. Support local businesses."

Vic looked at the nearest, made a face. "Not that into jewelry. And I don't really think there's a stall with comics of Funkos or cool shirts like an actual convention."

"I saw some shirts," Eric looked back down one end of the street, though by this point the crowd was big enough that it was hard to see any but the closest stalls. "Somewhere back there."

"Pretty sure they were sportsball."

Raven sighed good-naturedly at Vic's complaints. "I'm sure you can find something you like, if you try. Go, make an Investigation Check."

He shrugged, wandered off, without so much as a goodbye. Danny called after him, "But remember to be back for the performance! Half an hour."

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but maybe we should follow Vic's example," Vani suggested. "Split up, find something cool, then meet up back for the show. Later we can share if there's anything we can't-miss," I'd been through the entire street and nothing really stood out to me as "can't miss" but I liked the suggestion anyway, because it meant alone time.

Not all of us did. "But that goes against the number one rule, Never Split the Party." Danny's voice sounded a bit like a whine, but it was a playful one. "Besides, I wanted to grill Cal, find out what his deal is."

"We already have," Eric said. "Pre-med, solid geek cred but workaholic tendencies." Then, in what I assumed was mildly joshing final verdict, "Honestly, he's not that interesting, except for the magic tricks."

"Ooh, I like magic tricks."

I suppressed a grimace, wishing I hadn't shown off those. In a crowd like this, if someone was watching, ears were perking up. "Honestly it's nothing too impressive."

"Still, I'd like to see..." Allie made a noise, and Danny responded with an exaggerated sigh. "Fine, fine, you can show me later. But you owe me." He pointed at Allie, who stood there with a fixed smile on her face, and I couldn't tell if her face was red or she'd just been in the sun too long. "And half an hour. Come on Raven, I guess you're my fair-buddy."

Which made sense, with Vic already gone, and Vani and Eric wandering off in another direction, Danny and Raven left Allie and I together, as intended. My sister was always pretty, even when she dressed super casual, but even before I got distracted by being introduced to her friends, I'd got the impression she'd gone to a bit more effort this time around, like she was deliberately trying to impress. It wasn't dramatic, and maybe she just put more time in front of the mirror to look good for the performance for Danny's sake, but now that she had all my attention, I looked her over again and my eye caught on some of the little ways she'd taken things a step up more than usual. Her jeans were a little tighter, hugging her body more closely, outlining her curves more dramatically than I usually saw from her. The light gray camisole top had a scoop neck that showed off some more cleavage than I was used to. I shouldn't have been surprised, since it was actually pretty much the same outfit I saw in the scry mirror earlier, but I hadn't really noticed then. In person... well, it all felt distinctly non-casual, but crafted to look that way while lowkey showing off a little... especially with the shiny lip gloss, something Allie tended to only wear on dates. Which, now that we were left alone, this might start officially counting as. I should have been more worried about that, and what it implied, but really, with everyone else leaving us alone, a knot had loosened in my stomach, because my sensation of the aura had receded, if someone really was tracking Allie by proxy, it meant we were temporarily in the clear. Allie and I looked at each other with a shrug and we moved off through the crowd towards the opposite side of the street from Raven and Danny, and peeked in on the tents there, briefly looking over some food. "So, that's your D&D group?" I asked, to break the silence as it was starting to feel awkward, and before she broke it with a question I had trouble answering.

"Yeah. I mean, except Vani, now. She's taking some time out from the campaign cause her workload's getting heavy and it was getting hard to fit into her schedule. I'm sure she'll be back."

A thought tickled at my brain. "How long you been playing with them?"

"I don't know, a year and a half, maybe?"

If I had to guess, Vani's sabbatical from D&D took place right around when Allie was magically inserted into all of their lives. Probably, they were already a group before that, and Gnarly might be an extradimensional entity with the ability to rewrite people's memories on a whim, but I imagine scheduling one extra person into a regular game of Dungeons and Dragons is tricky, even for them, and letting one drop out and only remember being in the group could make a handy shortcut. They could just shift the date everyone met and have Vani remember it being easier to make time for in the past. The more I thought about my sister's false backstory, the more disturbing it tended to get... she shouldn't feel like an outcast, based on what Gnarly promised me, but when you've just been slotted into somebody else's friend group, how could you not? Still, everyone seemed to get along, and have genuine rapport and affection for each other and right now, the idea was narrowly comforting... because them all knowing each other prior to the meteor lessened the odds that any of them were secretly planted there by the Nobody or whoever was involved with placing the aura. "Seem like a good group."

"Yeah. Raven's a really good DM. I mean sometimes we switch off to do like one shots or mini campaigns so everyone's good, but Raven's really our mainstay."

I'd probably have guessed Danny, based on what I remembered her of her stories during that walk after the Attic. "What about you? You ever take the big chair?"

"Not with this group. I've tried it once or twice before, but mostly I like to save my worldbuilding energies for my writing." Her nose wrinkled like she found what she said ridiculous. "Listen to me, 'my writing,' Like I'm some big name author."

"If you write, you're a writer, and it's okay to talk about your writing if it's something you enjoy."

"Enjoy's kind of the rose-colored view of it. It's more like an equal mix of utter frustration and grim satisfaction. Like working out, I guess. When you're in the zone, it's great, but sometimes..." she trailed off. "I haven't even been doing much of the actual writing lately. Kind of a slump, I guess? I hope it's turning around and I just need a spark of inspiration, but who knows? Oh, these are nice."

In our meandering through the fair we'd reached a small stand selling jewelry, and she might have really been interested in the earrings she was looking at, but they weren't really her style as I knew it and I got the sense she just didn't want to talk about her writing problems anymore, so I went along with it. Jewelry doesn't really do much for me except, sometimes, as sacrificial material, but I looked through the offerings with pretended interest... they were too cheap to use for any particularly powerful magic. Even if you carried a necklace and snapped the chain when you ripped it off and threw it away for the power to launch a quick utility spell, you wouldn't get much--without a personal emotional attachment at least--but they were aesthetically pretty. I lifted one, a pendant necklace, to examine how the facets of the crystal (possibly just glass) caught the light.

"Wow, that one's really pretty," she said, and I went rigid, not from her surprising taste in jewelry but because she took it from my hands.. or rather, lifted it, her fingers brushing against mine, the warmth landing just a moment until she raised the pendant part to look at the crystal more closely, while I was connected to the other end of the chain. "I don't know if it's me, though."

"It's you if you want it to be. If it makes you happy, you should go for it. Life's short. Carpe Diem,"

She made an 'mmm' sound at her own words being thrown back at her, considering it, for a moment. "Not right now. Maybe I'll come back to it, but I might see something I like more, and I've set myself a budget."

"You could always buy it for her..." This suggestion came from the woman working the stand, her eyes crinkling, and between the din of the crowd and distant music, the mask she was wearing over her mouth, and her slight accent, I wasn't sure what she said at first. Either of them on their own, or maybe even two, probably wouldn't have been a problem, but there was a lot going on and so I was at a loss try until she repeated it louder and added, "Gift for your girlfriend."

There was a moment, then, almost deja vu, except it wasn't this exact event, just a memory of various times in my life people had made similar suggestions for Allie and I, hoping for a sale, misjudging our relationship. In those, we'd both make gestures of denial while speaking over each other with hurried... 'Oh, no' and maybe I'd follow up with a 'she is my sister' while Allie just got embarrassed. This time, I couldn't make that claim, and yet I didn't want to force the 'just friends' explanation, and make her less likely to continue the 'date' so I was the one who stood back embarrassed and left it to my sister--who didn't know that--handle the situation. Maybe she'd ask me to buy it for her, and I would.

She just shook her head, with an apologetic smile, and put the pendant down to raise her hand, wave it in front of her. "It's not like that," Then, to me, "You don't have to..." But maybe it showed on my face that I wondered if she really wanted me to, so she added, "Really, I don't need it, I'm serious."

I gave her a shrug where I tried to convey that it wasn't a big deal to me one way or the other, and the woman selling the jewelry seemed mildly disappointed, dismissing us entirely and looking for customers who were more willing to part with their money. Allie stepped away, and before I followed, I gave the necklace one last look, remembering the details in case I really did want to come back later on my own... in the old days, I sometimes would do that, too, if a birthday or holiday was coming up, even things that were suggested under the misconception of us being dating... if it was something she liked, it was just a gift. 'I don't need it' didn't mean she wouldn't be happy to get it. This time, though, I knew, a gift like that really would carry associations, raise expectations I shouldn't want raised... and yet. I still thought about whether or not I should come back, to buy it and give it to her later. Even knowing the signals it would send, if those signals would get her to accept the pendant and wear it... it might be worth it. Of course, I wasn't thinking of this merely as a token of my affection, but rather as a medium I could enchant with another protection spell, something more narrowly targeted than the class ring. That peace of mind might be worth a little playing with her heart, my own heart told me, even as it felt ashamed for the self-justifications.

Either way, it was a question for later, since I would need time alone with it to enchant it, which meant it had to be a surprise for later, not something I gifted her today, but I marked it out in my mind as we moved on, and used the lull in the conversation to bring up something else. "So, I couldn't help notice you didn't seem to mention my job, or that I'm not actually registered, to your friends."

"I don't make a habit of telling other people's secrets."

"Except... Terry or Tommy or whatever his name is."

"Those aren't secrets. He's a student and I'm just taking you to one of his classes." It seemed thin justification to me, considering she'd only known me a matter of days and was was willing to lead me to him, yet she didn't tell the friends she believed she'd known for a year and a half. Maybe she sensed that too, because, after a moment, she added, "Besides, that's different. He might have done something beyond just lying. Something involving weird ciphers painted on walls?"

I hadn't expected her to go there, right now. "I can't really talk about it."

A sigh in her voice signalled her disappointment as she said, "Of course."

"I can maybe tell you a little more... but not here, in public." I'd had some time to think about it and came up with something that might be plausible. An explanation that might not technically contain any lies but was misleading and relied on me being able to put up a wall to head off further questions when I needed to.

She tilted her head, eyes widening with what I thought was hope, before she looked towards the next stall. "Well.. I should probably admit... I did tell Raven about you. When I first figured it out. I swore them to secrecy though."

"Them?" I asked distractedly, while I briefly wondered if that look of hope was actually suspicion, and this a subtle warning in case I was only trying to get her alone to do something nefarious.

She side-eyed me suddenly, like she was making sure I wasn't one of those people who freaked out about other people preferring different pronouns, and said carefully, "Well, Raven's cool with she/her and they/them. I just usually go they unless it makes the sentence awkward."

"Noted. I'll try to remember. And hopefully, in another couple days, you can tell them whatever you want." I realize I had to specify, "Collective them, that is. All of them." I was happy to refer to people any way they preferred, but sometimes it made things confusing. Though it did occur to me that, when the time came and I had to separate from Allie's life, maybe I could hold that in my back pocket, pretend to that kind of casual bigotry where I insist I know better about who people are than they do and that I'd only been playing along to get her to like me. It'd make me feel slimy, but it would give her plenty of reason not to want to be near me.

Oh, but the thought ached, and I didn't know that I'd have the strength for a complete alienation, the more time I spent with her the more I wanted to stay part of her life... perhaps a lesser one, but to be someone she could always call if she needed to. Even just wandering around, in a crowded street fair, together... I wasn't relaxed, because I was keeping my eye out for anyone suspicious, but I still felt lighter, like the world wasn't so oppressive. Conversation became a struggle, as more people started to show up, but we didn't need to talk, we could just be in the same space, checking out delicious looking food or crafts, and I didn't feel so alone.

Before too long, we headed back to catch the performance, and met up with her friends again. The only unusual thing I picked up on was that Eric and Vani seemed to be holding hands, though I had no idea whether that signalled a new phase in their situation or just a moment of affection, and didn't really have time to ask before the performance began. The band was just three people, but they had their own instruments, and they were better than I expected considering a boyfriend-organized cheering section was deemed necessary in advance. I'm not saying they were the next big thing or anything, but they were solidly good, and drew more of a crowd than anybody else. That might have been partly due to the luck of starting their set when a lot of people were getting their food and drinks. Aside from one churro Allie bought from a stand that surprisingly didn't have much of a lineup, and some bottled water, we hadn't gotten anything yet, which was a good thing because a surge of the crowd did push Allie right into me... if she'd had a tray of food or one of those big plastic cups it would have spilled all over me, but instead I caught her against my body, made sure she was really okay, and checked quickly to see if it was anything other than an innocent trip. No, it seemed to be normal, only her friends were nearby, similarly crowded, Allie's stumble against me just a chain reaction of several other shoved as somebody tried to move out of the way too fast or in the wrong direction. I'd already used the cover of the crowd to wipe that aura off Vani... it was now weak enough that the cost of countering an active spell was within my sacrifice budget, sparking an unfortunate flare up of my knee pain but I could hide that, too, and in the end I was feeling pretty good at not having that hanging over me. A collision like that might have been a pretext for a new aura being set, but I didn't sense anything, so I gave Allie a tremulous smile at the clumsiness and her embarrassment of it, and, standing much closer now, we went back to enjoying the music.

Or at least she did. Sensing no auras around me I certainly felt better, but not completely safe, and, although our new closeness also meant some of my wards would extend to her, that was a double-edged sword, as I was also aware that with every shift of movement I'd bump against or graze my sister's body in some way, After the second time my arm brushed against her chest I knew I wasn't focusing on the right thing, so I tried to tune the music out--as well as everything else--and instead watched the crowd, looking mostly for the Nobody but also for anyone, like me, who seemed to have their mind on something other than the music.

The one person that stood out most was a tall guy, shaved bald with a goatee, well built enough to mark him out as a potential wish-fulfilled mage, dressed in a grey tank top, arms crossed with a grumpy expression on his face. You might think the music wasn't to his taste, or his friends dragged him here, but he was standing off by himself, and his eyes, much like mine, were roaming more over the crowd than the performers. He also had a bit of a bruise on his face, like that sometime in the last week or so he'd taken a punch--or given himself one. Still, he wasn't the Nobody I was watching for and struck me as a little older than average for somebody recruited on campus by him. I decided he was more likely to be security, maybe a club bouncer or an undercover cop moonlighting, jobs where such injuries are not uncommon.. I memorized the face, as I did for a couple others, who pinged my radar for some reason... obvious scars, masks (which might have just been prudent in a big crowd since COVID but unusual enough that I put them on my personal watchlist in case it was more about hiding their identity than protecting against illness). None of them, just then, seemed like enough of a worry to inspire me to take action, especially since my wards hadn't picked up anything. I couldn't track every spell cast, not in a big area like this, but I was confident that any spells nearby mages hypothetically might have cast weren't used to track anyone near me, or trying to muddle minds in an area including me, or investigating me directly.

Once the set was complete, we clapped enthusiastically, Allie and a few of the friends cheered, the crowd lessened, and Danny went off to talk to his boyfriend, while the rest of us moved towards the fringes of the festival where conversation was a little less of a struggle. Apparently Vani was serious about her idea of sharing anything "can't miss" we found in the booths but all anyone could remember was food-related, and aside from getting a churro neither of us had found particularly notable, though Allie did report both the churro and the jewelry vendor. It was still light out, but sunset was threatening to hit soon, and we made small talk for a bit until Danny brought his boyfriend by, who turned out to be named Luke. I refrained from making an esoteric Heroes for Hire joke with their first names and just observed the dynamics. From what I could gather, he was closest to Danny, of course, and knew Eric enough for a friendly greeting and thanks, but knew the others only in passing. Thankfully, that meant I wasn't even interesting to him on the level of 'Allie's apparent date' because it looked like he only knew Allie through Danny... there was no extra attention paid to me, just a polite hello, and I could fade into the background while they continued the discussion which, at that point, was about the upcoming big Comic Con, the group promising each other they'd get tickets next year as (I imagined) they had for several years before. Luke and Danny only stuck around for a bit, like Luke was putting in some facetime with his boyfriend's geekier friends, before going off on their own date... which seemed a signal for everybody else. Vic was already clearly anxious to go (I got the vibe he didn't like crowds, or outdoor gatherings and this was an exception made against his better judgment at Danny's request), and Allie announced that we--me and her--were going probably going somewhere less crowded to get something to eat. There was no implied invitation to come along, and everyone seemed to pick up on that.

We said our goodbyes, and headed off down the street, which was still reasonable crowded but thinned out away from the music, except for big knots around food venues and other attractions. The worry about something happening seemed to have been for nothing, and it was already starting to be eclipsed by the anxiety over the tightrope I was going to walk with my explanations to Allie.

"Any idea where you want to eat?" she asked. "We could grab something here and go somewhere like quiet, or..."

"The lines are starting to get pretty intense... and I'd rather some place indoors, where we can sit down. Talk." And where I could monitor the entrance. It was better to be in a contained space that certain wards and other spells can latch onto and do their thing without Gnarly or whatever processes they put in place deciding I'm being too vague to bother altering reality for. "I don't know the area too well though..."

"Yeah, me either. We could always ask Google..." She held up her phone, which luckily didn't automatically chime in with an opinion, because she added, "Or we could just walk for a bit, see if we can find some little hole-in-the-wall. They're sometimes the best places, so maybe we'll luck out and discover something... magical."

Considering her opinions on magic, I assumed she was being figurative, and I liked the idea of finding some place only the two of us knew. Or rather, that had enough customers to survive but wasn't going to be particularly busy or known to anyone in her circle.. "I'm game."

"Great. I just need a minute," she said, and nodded her head towards the nearest lines of porta-potties set up for the event. "Mind waiting for me?"

"Oh. Sure." While she did her business, I looked about casually, rehearsing my explanation in my head for the conversations to come, trying to predict what she might ask in response and plotting out my answers to that, a flow chart in my head that I hate having to put together but can't seem to help, particularly when the stakes are high... but my over-preparing stopped when I saw the bald goatee guy with the bruised face again.

It could have been nothing... just someone in the area, looking for a friend, or, yes, site security keeping an eye out for trouble. But the crowd was much more sparse here, and he seemed to be looking for something, like he was following someone and lost track of them... because she'd gone into the restroom, for example. He stopped near me... not right next to me, probably still far enough away that my Warden protections made his eyes slide off and not notice me, but near enough that he looked past me a few times in the general direction, then stepped a few feet down and glanced around again. His mouth worked, saying something to himself or an invisible friend or someone on a phone or something I couldn't see, then turned away.

I wasn't sure he was anything to worry about, then, but I was worried, and suddenly sure I had to find a way to check if he was magic aware and, maybe, take him out before he spotted Allie again, and me by association. In enough of a crowd he might not realize who I was, even if he knew my face and I was beside Allie, but if it was just the two of us... mages can do enough of the math to defeat some of my usual tricks. I didn't have that advantage, nor did I have any easy way to tell if he was a mage, short of a vulgar act of magic or some kind of message that would alert him too much.

I remembered, then, what Haley said, about the glasses she gave me, and other mages possibly being able to notice a message of zero length being sent to them. How would that manifest? When I got a message, I tended to look up suddenly. Maybe he'd do the same action, like he'd just heard a phone ring but then realized it was his imagination. So I centered him in the scratched box on the inner lens of the sunglasses, then, as though I was just adjusting them on my face, tapped the corner to trigger the magical effect.

There was no result.

My stomach clenched for a moment, because I don't mean that he didn't seem to react, although he didn't. I mean that there was no slight increase in the damage done to the lenses, no cost paid, no spell cast at all. That was supposed to be the signal.

That meant the glasses detected a Nobody. But it wasn't the particular Nobody I'd been on alert for.

My instant of panic receded, and then I felt perversely relieved when the alternative explanations occurred to me. Maybe he moved out of the sights in the last minute. Or Haley neglected to disclose there was a maximum range that I'd exceeded. I held onto those paltry rationalizations only as long as it to do a few quick tests. Focused on somebody farther than him... a wave of queasiness hit me, like one of those random moments where for no particular reason you throw up in your mouth a little and swallow it back down, except without anything actually coming up. Then, I tested goatee guy again. Nothing. He was a Nobody, or something else was preventing him from being sent to. Maybe, like some people were naturally immune to memory manipulation, some people just couldn't be directly addressed for reasons other than being Nobodys.

My rationalizations were getting thinner, more desperate, but I was ready to abandon them in practice and consider him a threat, pay more attention to him. He was still scanning for faces, still occasionally muttering to himself or someone else, and I checked out one of the places his eye kept returning to, saw somebody at least fifty feet away--a guy with longer, blond hair, in a cloth mask that I'd noted earlier and took for a music listener--give him a head-tilt of recognition and a shake of his head that I worried was the answer to the question of 'do you see her?' I put mask-guy in the sights of my glasses, tapped the corner... and felt sick again, but not from the glasses. A second no-result, possibly a second Nobody. Third in total. If I were to sum up my thoughts at this moment, it would probably be some variation of Fuckshitfuckfuck.

None of my wards had been triggered. That should have meant something. It didn't seem to, as I only stumbled upon these two from good old observation and a little luck. I couldn't rely on that much longer, so I started testing more people in the area. I must have burned through most of the lifespan of the glasses, testing anyone who looked the slightest bit suspicious, and a few who weren't. By the time I was done, I felt like I was going to throw up for real, the scratches were so big they were starting to look like cracks... and, worst of all, I'd identified another guy in the gang. Shorter guy, spikey hair, young or at least baby-faced, and if I wasn't already alarmed I would have just assumed he was another teenager obsessed with his phone and only looking up to avoid bumping into things... but the glasses said he might be a Nobody, so I wasn't willing to take any chances. The worst thing was, I couldn't even be sure he was the only other one. I could only test people in my line of sight.

All I currently had was some disturbing evidence that somehow, I'd hit on a group of Nobodies working together. That alone should be alarming enough, but it got so much worse because it seemed like what they were working on was stalking my sister through a crowded venue... and, I could only imagine, waiting for a moment when it wasn't so crowded.

Chapter 19

A Nobody works alone. It was the standard wisdom that practically made it to the level of official lore. After all, these are people who, for whatever magical effect they needed, willingly tore themselves out of every connection they had in the world, let themselves be erased from every record or photograph and every living memory. People who are capable of that, generally speaking, aren't the most social people anyway. If they were, with a sudden loss and no friends to turn to for comfort, it had to leave a bleeding hole in your heart, make you shy about making future attempts to bond with people because, in the back of your mind, you'd be left with the knowledge that you might one day do it again. It doesn't really make a solid foundation for starting new friendships. Of course, some of them are probably like those sociopaths who are glibly capable of charming strangers even with no history behind them (though for their patron to offer the bargain in the first place, their social loss had to hurt and be an actual sacrifice), so I had never dismissed the idea of a Nobody starting a cult of vulnerable students with the offer of magical power... but, multiple Nobodies? Working together? That made no sense to me. How would they even get together? It's not like there were subreddits for people the magical community hunted down, and convincing a disciple into becoming a Nobody meant not only they had enough magic not to really need a teacher anymore, but the teacher would no would longer even remember them as a disciples at all. If they met afterwards, the teacher would see some magical stranger claiming to know them, and probably suspect they were sent by the Council as a trap. What would cause them to trust one another and find common cause?

I didn't have time to delve into those issues. All I knew is that either Haley's magic Nobody-detecting glasses were screwed up on a fundamental level, or I'd have to question all my assumptions about the situation. How long had they been following her? Were they lurking in the background every time I was with her, and I just didn't notice because I was focused on the one I'd already identified? Ironically, I hoped so, because that meant the odds were this was a continuing pattern rather than a disturbing escalation. I couldn't rely on that assumption, though, nor could I be confident I was going to be much use protecting my sister if something happened. I'd banked on the Nobody stalking Allie being somewhere himself, maybe with a few disciples he'd picked up as backup or support, but they'd be disciples with reputations they were unwilling to risk on an open, public, scene, and probably wannabes who hadn't forged a direct magical connection to one of the Outer Gods. Or, if they had, without much knowledge in making good pacts and doing collective magic. There is a learning curve, early on, that some mages exploit to keep their apprentices manageable and dependent. In such a situation, considering my Warden buffs, as long as I wasn't caught completely by surprise, I was reasonably confident that if we had to throw down, I could prevail, particularly if I spotted the master first. I didn't want that, not with my sister anywhere nearby, but odds were in my favor. But you need a strong link to a patron to become a Nobody in the first place, and with at least three of them on the board? Assume four if the ringleader was lurking somewhere unseen (and the one I saw that night at the Attic might not even be the ringleader, I realized suddenly, but rather simply the one I'd noticed first, which meant identifying the strongest one was tricky)... it was dangerous. And if it was possible for a group like that to work collective magic, like the meteor cult, I might be hopelessly outmatched. Better, then, not to use magic at all... a good enchanted item, maybe, but I didn't have my gun with me, so spells and general savviness were my only tools.

Unless you're ready to be immediately and brutally fatal, it's always dangerous to launch the first active spell against another mage. And even then, it's a dicey. You don't know what wards they might have come prepared with. Any prudent mage has got at least some up, and although warding against every possible attack is practically impossible, the wrong choice can blow back on you or at least put you on their radar. That was part of why I wanted them to trigger my wards--there were traps built in--but they were being remarkably careful about that.

I still wasn't sure if they knew I was there. Or at least, I wasn't sure if either whatever collective power they might have or their non-casual focus on Allie penetrated my Warden anonymity-at-a-distance. My options were different depending on whether they realized another mage was right here or if I was just registering on their minds as 'potential witness in the area' that they were trying to wait out. If I could divert their attention, Allie and I might be able to slip the net, but of course everything becomes harder when they have an idea what to expect. We were still in the part of the street that was closed off, or I might have tried to engineer a small traffic accident. Not my first choice, because innocents could be hurt in the process, but it would be a good way to divert eyes, and, if I do it right, potentially take out a stalker directly. A stall suddenly collapsing might do serve the distraction bit, but if they're too focused on Allie it would just seems suspicious enough to tip my hand. Unless....

There might be a way. I decided to take a gamble on some light mental manipulation. It seemed like they'd lost sight of Allie, were each looking in different directions, and all I needed was to create a hole in the net long enough for us to get away. I mimed scratching my shoulder in order to grip my amulet and asked Gnarly what it might take to interfere with their memories. Just a little. It was risky play since most mages will block this sort of thing first, but my scope was very limited. I had no desire to implant or remove anything--that's where most precautions are usually focused--and I also had a secret ace on my side. I might already be inside his memory. The anonymity magic that I was hoping worked on them was powered by the collective sacrifice of most of the mages in the District, and as such could slip past a lot of basic wards... and I was hoping Gnarly would let me widen it, just a little, use that foothold I already had in their brains and perceptions and, just for a little while, prevent them all from accessing the memories of what Allie looked like. It was one of those secret Warden tricks Liz taught me that even the Council isn't entirely aware of--I think. If it worked, their eyes might pass over my sister when she got out, but it would trigger no recognition, she'd be just another face in the crowd while they searched for theirs target, each unaware that they couldn't remember what his target looked like - unless one of them specifically tried to focus on that mental image. That would be the time to create a distraction.

Gnarly didn't have to answer the request at all. They might not, if my anonymity was already blown, but that wasn't the only reason. If it was too much trouble, it would just be ignored unless I whined a lot, and if I did that I might not like the answer at all. If my patron did answer, they might set too high a price and not guarantee the target's wards wouldn't notice. But, just maybe, I could get what I needed to get us away without any fuss.

As was typical, I got somewhere in between the best and worst options. To do it to all of the ones I'd identified, I'd pay a steep price... not just a visible amount of blood, but also exchanging my anonymity for Allie's. Absolutely something I'd do, if I could get her away from me fast and be sure there weren't any others I hadn't spotted, but now wasn't the moment for that, or drawing attention to me by suddenly bleeding in a crowded place. At least the offer proved they weren't just playing dumb by not reacting visibly to me... my anonymity was indeed intact and they didn't know I was there yet. So instead of merely rejecting the deal and taking my chances, I focused on the closest one, the one checking faces where I was, while the others looked other directions, and asked again, risking bothering an all powerful extradimensional entity. How much for just that one then? Gnarly was in a good mood I guess. That magical boon could be granted, subtly, with a little pain (Gnarly really liked working the knee today), one of the mildly rare Just-In-Case coins I keep in a hidden pocket (each worth anywhere from fifty to a couple hundred dollars), my phone going into update mode when I next needed it (sometimes Gnarly asks for weirdly specific frustrations) and losing my ability to detect auras near me. Fine, that last was mostly to check on Vani anyway and see if they'd hedged their bets with anyone else, but I hadn't picked up any others. I fished out a coin without looking at it (that was part of the bargain, my not knowing exactly how much I was giving up) and dropped it to the curb, concentrated to seal the pact. No words required this time, no chance of copying the trick later, Gnarly just made a quick, temporary adjustment to one mind that I hoped would be enough. I felt my knee give way under me, tried to cover it with a shoelace check before I gained control of the pain, which I had to do fast... I could hear Allie washing her hands inside. By the time she got out, I was looking at my phone, to start the update and get it out of the way, and put it away like nothing dramatic was happening. "Ready to go?" Please don't dawdle.

"Yeah," she said, and I spared a glance over to goatee-Nobody who was still scanning in this direction but with no recognition.

"I think we'd have better luck going this way," I suggested, heading her off before we continued the direction we were already going, and aiming down a side street. Luckily, Allie rolled with the decision, probably assuming I'd looked something up on my phone after all, but my real goal with the direction was just to avoid the sightlines of each Nobody I'd identified. Each step was a sharp sting of pain. The pain was only going to last a couple minutes, but I couldn't afford to stay idle that time, since the face-blindness trick, as limited as it was, wasn't going to last much longer. Specifically, until the stars were visible in the sky. It was still technically daylight, but dusk was approaching fast, so I needed to get moving. Keeping my leg rigid as I walked, bending the joint as little as possible, helped, but only so much. I hoped Gnarly was enjoying my suffering. Not entirely, since half of me hoped they were choking on it and would turn over a new cosmic leaf but that wasn't likely so keeping the patron satisfied was still in my own best interest.

I didn't risk looking back until it would look natural, when we were considering changing direction at an intersection, and maybe we would have, put a little more distance between us when I spared a glance back and saw a silhouette who looked like Mask-Nobody. Glasses either confirmed, or he was out of range, but I wasn't feeling hopeful enough not to assume the worst. Shit. Shit fucking shit. They'd either had somebody else in the sight lines, or were tracking her with some other means. My wards against magical surveillance were still quiet, but that didn't mean they hadn't tapped into security cameras or, for all I know, using some drone above us. I let Allie choose the direction, and honestly carry most of the conversation, while I tried to sort through my options, and make some limited attempts to offer up deals to Gnarly, but all of them were turning out too expensive or risked revealing my presence and turning a stalk into a streetfight, one I wasn't sure I could win. Getting us away would be ideal, and if I could manage some alone time for the two of us, I might be able to make the price of that cheap enough to work, but for that, or failing that, I needed to either take out some of the people tailing us, or protect Allie from their interest. I had an idea for the last, so I was scanning desperately for some excuse to get inside somewhere... and then I saw just what I needed. A Dollar Tree. "Hey, you mind if we stop in there, for a moment?"

Allie seemed just a little thrown by the choice, but was willing to roll with it. "Uh, sure, we can do that."

"It won't take long..." I promised, hoping it was true, but mostly hoping it would give us a little privacy. I was definitely sure we needed it, because as we entered it was clear the face-blindness on one of them clearly wasn't enough because, I caught another glimpse of Mask-Nobody, walking casually down the street after us and pretending not to be looking at us. Over his shoulder, I thought Phone-Nobody might be in the distance, too. I didn't see Goatee-Nobody, but he might still be affected by the face-blindness anyway (my knee had stopped complaining, thankfully, but the stars weren't visible yet). Even without him, going into an enclosed space could wind up being like walking myself and Allie right into a trap, but... I felt better inside. The most important rules of tailing someone is to keep a discreet distance and don't let your target notice your face appearing over and over again, so if they were smart, they wouldn't send anyone to follow us directly, especially if they had enough people to cover a back exit. Any store would have provided the cover I wanted, but I hoped this particular venue would help by into lulling them into a false sense of security, that this diversion wasn't prompted by another mage looking for supplies. Dollar store supplies lead to Dollar store-level spells, at least in most people's minds, but I wasn't here for sacrifice material anyway. Stores like these are also identical enough in the same way that coffee shops, where my Warden defenses will bounce any scrying attempts to another, similar place. I was really hoping that would give us enough time for me to engineer another escape, or the ingredients for one..

I scanned the shelves idly, but it wasn't physical ingredients I was interested in, I was mostly using my browsing as a cover to quickly identify the cameras and find a blind spot within them, then asked Gnarly what one particular exit strategy would cost me... and recoiled. No. Bad enough that it would require me explaining the truth to Allie, right then, but... I couldn't do that. Could I? My other plan was borderline enough.

"I hope you weren't thinking that buying me something here counts as dinner..." she joked, or at least I assumed she joked, while we passed by some of the cheap foods.

I gave a weak smirk but was too distracted to give a good reply, as I heard the door chime go off. "No, I just needed..." I trailed off, getting eyes on the door. A man, not one I recognized as a Nobody already, but that didn't prove anything, so I centered him in my glasses, tapped.

The lens of my glasses fell apart, that last test which proved whoever entered wasn't a Nobody, but the cost of the zero-length message it sent was just enough to push the structural integrity over the edge. Allie let out a laugh, short, surprised, and then said, "Wow. You really ride things to destruction." Then a smirk. "Good to know, I guess. At least we're in the right place to get you a new pair."

I bent to collect the pieces and shove them in a pocket. "That's really not why I wanted to stop here," I said, feeling like I was stumbling over my own words as I guided her towards the blind spot. "I, uh... actually wanted to give you something." Her amusement faded, replaced by an arched eyebrow of curiosity. I hadn't practiced this scenario nearly enough to make it seem smooth, but I reached for my neck, then stopped, turned around, not so much out of modesty but so she wouldn't spot my amulet while I removed the other chain around my neck, the class ring that, in another life, Allie had worn herself. Once it was in my hand, I turned again, seeing on Allie's face that I'd stepped so far out of her expectations that she wasn't sure how to react, she just stared, mouth hanging slightly open. "I know it's going to sound crazy, but would you wear this?" I asked, holding it out towards her. "Or at least keep it close to you?"

"Uh... Cal.... you're..." she let out a nervous laugh. "Giving out some serious mixed signals here. You don't even really call this a date, and now... what is this, your class ring?"

The actual school was no longer legible, rendered into indecipherable runes with some etching I'd recently done. My intention was to try and make the damage I was doing serve dual purpose, both enhancing the existing enchantment and making them look more like runes, but I suppose fundamentally it still looked like a cheap class ring, so no sense denying it. "Yeah, but..." I wished she already believed in magic. I wish I could afford to explain, walk her through it step by step. "It's not what you think," I finished, and thought I saw a her lips curl down. Did giving a girl your class ring have implications? I guess sometimes, but it didn't seem to when I gave it to my sister last time. I tried my best to come up with something plausible. "It's just you're going out on a limb, helping me, and... this is sort of a lucky charm for me."

She gave me a bit of the old side-eye, clearly dubious. "You sure it isn't more of a 'get lucky' charm? Do you try this line on all the girls you meet in your job?"

"I'm serious, Allie," I said, maybe a bit too fast and harsh. "Things might get dangerous, and I'd feel a lot better if you had this..."

"A lucky necklace? I don't really believe in luck..."

"But I do." Particularly when it was code for magic that altered probabilities, made people not notice you, and, most importantly alerted someone when you felt in danger. "And more importantly, so do the people I'm after. They're... well, they're like a cult. And if things get weird, having this might help."

"Fine..." She took the chain from my hand, put it in a pocket. "But you owe me more of an explanation than that."

"You'll get one," I told her, knowing I wasn't going to be able to avoid it, now. Multiple Nobodies working together, I'd have to call the Council in, and explain to Allie so she could be safe. But I still felt like I couldn't, not yet. "I promise. Just... over dinner." I gave her a weak, 'everything is okay, really' smile. It only counted as lying to her if it was words, right?

I realize I should have just told her, that the danger was real, around us right now, but... I was just terrified of her reaction, that she'd think I was crazy, bolt right into the danger, or almost as bad, reveal that she knew they were there, and spook them into taking that direct action. If I could just get her to a calmer, safer, location where we weren't actively being followed, I could prove magic was real, give her time to have that freakout reaction where it wouldn't be potential catastrophic. If I wanted to take Gnarly's offer, I might be able to jump to that part, but the cost... I couldn't do that, not while there was a chance we might avoid it. How could I increase those chances? The class ring, alone, even souped up, probably wouldn't be enough to make another mage lose track of her once they'd already focused on her. It would work best on people who hadn't noticed her yet. But if I gave the magic a little help, as I planned... and the more help, the better. Could I convince Allie to change clothes? "Well, let's just get your sunglasses so we can go, then, "she said, when I spent too long thinking. "You've got me hungry and curious and that's one of my more dangerous combination platters."

"Sure, right." I continued down the aisle, then circled back through another lane that had clothes, and slowed, still ambling towards the door, but casually, while I hoped to find something that might work, might help. I probably couldn't convince Allie to change too much. The store probably didn't have a changing room, and Allie wasn't likely to strip off her top in the aisles because I said something would look good on her, but maybe something might be thrown on top? "See anything you want for yourself? You could get a nice hat."

I wasn't pointing at any specific hat, but she chose the first one in the general area, pulling it off and putting it on her head, some cheap straw thing. "What do you think? Is it me?"

"Doesn't exactly fit in with the rest of the ensemble." She had the face for it, and with it she seemed almost the picture of some farm girl, in a nineteenth century pastoral novel... only who dressed like a modern woman from the neck down. It wasn't her, but she somehow made it work... but then, Allie looked good in almost anything. For my purposes, though, it wasn't a good idea... changing her look was what I wanted, but doing so in a way that made her stand out would work completely counter to the goal. I was thinking more along the lines of a baseball cap, but after putting the straw one back she passed them by without interest. Then we passed some cheap umbrellas, which wouldn't work for the same reason as the hat. It wasn't raining, wasn't likely to, and even if used as a parasol would stand out... but I might not need anything. What I'd already done probably set things up enough for a distraction play, and the umbrellas gave me an idea for exactly how, which calmed my racing mind down, letting me settle into the cool mindset I get when I'm committing to a plan and just need to get it to work. My idea would use magic and it was a little vulgar but it just might do the trick, potentially working on all observers, even ones I hadn't identified.

The sunglasses stand was near the cashier, and unfortunately Allie didn't take up my offer to get one for herself, since it was getting close to dark. She did eye some of the snacks that were there to tempt people on their last walk up to pay for things, but whether in anticipation of dinner or just didn't want me to offer to pay for them, too, left them behind. All we got were the sunglasses. While we waited, I checked the windows for our stalkers and a good target for the spell I wanted, then consulted Gnarly for the price, dreading it would be abominably high.

I lucked out. First, another rare coin, fine, I was burning through my supply, but it was worth it. Gnarly must have got the picture that I'd need to run soon after, so no knee pain this time (it would probably still hurt from the earlier sacrifices, but I could push through it). Instead, aside from a sharp, blinding stab of head pain as the pact was initialized, I'd be paying in blood... but here Gnarly was unusually generous and allowed that to be deferred, sacrificed within five minutes of touching my pillow at home. Like a geas, I'd pretty much have to do it, and it would involve more blood than it would if I was giving it fresh, and I guessed it was probably intended to make sleeping immediately after a struggle too, but it was all a better deal than I expected. Deferred sacrifices didn't happen often, because there was always the chance my death would cheat Gnarly out of their due. I supposed it was a good sign that they liked my chances of getting home to a good night's sleep.

I'd already had the head pain, which set up the initial conditions that I wanted, and the blood due was coming when I went to bed, but timing was important here, so my spell wouldn't actually trigger until I discarded the valuable coin, which I palmed while pretending to look for a spot to hang my new, cheap sunglasses. I could tell I'd selected a dime, probably one of the 1982 Roosevelt dimes without the P mint mark. I'm not deep into numismatics--I pretty much know just enough to be aware of what I'm giving up when I use one to power a spell--but that particular type of semi-rare coin had sentimental value as well because Liz gave one to me when I was in Warden training as my first Just-In-Case coin. Maybe it was even the same one. I spent it long ago for a vulgar spell I needed on the job--I don't even remember which, cases and sacrifices all blur together after a while--but picked up another one in an online auction soon after that might well have been the very one I used. Who knows? All that mattered was that it was worth a lot of money--at least, I paid a lot of money for it--so it was once again good sacrifice material.

Theoretically, after I cast another spell with it this time, I could come back tomorrow and pick the coin up again, and it would still have value, but more likely than not, it would be gone, picked up by some unsuspecting child or magically transmuted into some common dime the moment it hit the ground. If it was there, if Gnarly noticed, I might pay for it in other ways, like the coin was just a stand-in for another deferred sacrifice to be named later, and when I recovered it my patron would gleefully hit me with some greater pain later one they'd already decided on but didn't think I'd accept. Maybe that's how it was with my sister too, that our relationship would never be the same, or Gnarly would make me suffer. I still wonder whether this was all some cosmic payback for trying to find her in the first place, that if I'd just let well enough alone, she would have been fine... out of my life forever, but safe.

Of course, Gnarly wasn't likely to ever give me a straight answer on that--or any answer at all, certainly not in words, probably not in feelings either--and whatever the case, now that I knew Allie was in danger, whatever the source, I was committed, and would sacrifice anything if it made her a little safer. A rare coin was, pardon the pun, small change, so, without ever intending to come back for it. I dropped the dime right as we were about to pass through the threshold of the door.

When we emerged, a nearby fire hydrant burst, a dramatic spray of water began geysering into the air, far enough to that the immediate spray wasn't going to hit us, but close enough that it was like walking into a sudden rainstorm. Allie's first instinct might have been to back into the store, but that would waste all that work, so I took charge, took her hand and started leading her away by a route that was away from the hydrant but would still wind up getting us wet before we were totally clear, running right across the road, seemingly heedless of everyone else being able to see us.

There's a thing, called inattentional blindness, where people are focusing so hard on one thing, like counting the number of times a basketball is passed, that they miss something that would normally stand out, like a person in a gorilla suit walking into the scene. This wasn't quite like that--almost the opposite, considering I was using a dramatic event to divert their attention from someone they're actively looking for, something that shouldn't work for more than a few seconds on anyone who's halfway serious about following somebody--but... I've used tricks like these before to shake tails, even from other mages. When you combine a low-level anonymity effect and a big, dramatic distraction... it's like the distraction reminds them that're supposed to be watching for that hidden gorilla, and they focus so hard on that, on not being distracted, that the magic anonymity can let you slip right by them, especially if you're not actually acting shady. That's the key, being blatant about it. If I'd used the distraction. and slipped down into an alley, it was less likely to work. Of course, there a lot of circumstantial factors too, which was why I couldn't do it at the porta-potties... if I hadn't given Allie my ring, it probably wouldn't work. If I'd given it to her a week ago and they were following her despite that, it probably wouldn't have worked either, because they'd adapted. If they'd seen me give her the ring, had an inkling or even a guess at what it might be, that might screw it up too. But if not, that slight change in what they were expecting, her... attention profile, if you will, combined with the raining water, I hoped would let us run right past them, overlooked as some ordinary people on the street reacting to the sudden event. Even though Allie followed me across the street scream-laughing like she was on a roller coaster, they could ignore her and go back to staring at the store waiting for her to come out, or be spooked into checking for backdoors we might have slipped through.

I hoped. But there's a thing mages sometimes say about hope... it's not even worth offering up for magic, because the gods can skim it off the top whenever they want and call it a tax. Which is not entirely true, it often is a sacrifice material, but it's right in that tax day comes for us all eventually, even mages realize sometimes that all their hoping didn't matter a bit. I still don't know if the trick actually ever worked on more than just the one I saw when I looked back over my shoulder. That was Phone Guy Nobody, and he did indeed seem to only give us a passing glance, one that held my heart in my throat... before he turned away and gazed back at the door. I'm pretty sure it worked on him, but I don't know how many they had nearby at that moment. Being blatant was generally good, but maybe her giddy shriek drew just enough attention to her personally that for one of the other stalkers, it screwed up the intended effect. I'm not blaming Allie of course, I probably should have counted on that, knowing her as well as I did. Or maybe it worked on each individual Nobody but not that hypothetical airborne drone. Possibly, we did lose them and they just found us again a little later. All I know was it wasn't the last we saw of them, just a short reprieve.

I took it any reprieve we could get, and as we reached the other end of the street breathless, and Allie's screams had faded in favor of laughter, I thought it might have worked, and felt lighter. I kept us moving, though, not even noticing I was still holding her hand, until we got around a corner and stopped to catch our breath, and I saw Allie try to fix her hair a little and I did ran a hand through mine too while she peeled her shirt away from her skin where it had gotten wet. "Well, I guess we've done the 'getting caught in the rain' bit... we just need to find some Pina Coladas."

I grinned, reflexively, partly out of the relief of what seemed like success, partly from the rush of the familiar in the words. It was one of Allie's stock jokes, she'd made variations of it so many times I couldn't even keep count, and normally, it barely warranted an indulgent eye roll anymore. After all, it didn't even really make sense, when you thought about it, since the song was about a dude in a relationship planning to cheat with an exciting stranger via personal ads only to find it was his partner all along, something Allie hated when I first pointed that out, but it didn't stop her from making the references. Not to mention that a burst fire hydrant or whatever other thing got us wet when she made the joke often wasn't actually rain at all... but, this time, hearing that old joke was genuinely refreshing and if not funny, at least gratifying to my spirit on a deep level, like a sign maybe our relationship wasn't that far off from what it had been, that I really could get that same coin back one day. Probably not true, but it felt good. It would feel better if I could be sure it was just the two of us. "You know, I'm all for the random discovery idea, but... since it'd be nice to find some place we can sit and dry off a bit, maybe we should just like Google the nearest restaurants so we can head right for it," I suggested, trying to take a casual glance about. "Or maybe even take an Uber to one." We seemed to be out of sight of any Nobody I'd identified but more distance was good. I pulled out my phone, then remembered. "Damn forced update." Still going on.

"I got it," Allie offered, and spent a minute or two on her phone while I watched for any signs we were being followed again. Nothing, but I was getting antsy with my sister there just taking her time. At least it seemed that way, like she wasn't just looking up something but taking the opportunity to answer a few texts while she was there. Finally, she said, "I think the nearest cluster of some restaurants are this way..."

"Then let's go." Indoors would be better. Maybe I could at least start the process of explaining what was going on, enough to convince her she was in danger, maybe convince her to come home with me, for her own protection, and while there, I could show her some real magic. Literal, magic, that is, of the vulgar kind. I realize now that it all sounds like double entendres and can only hope that when the chance came to explain, it didn't sound like cheap come-ons... but I wasn't going to get the chance.

It was only a short walk to the area Allie found on her phone, and I could tell we were getting close by the aroma of cooking meat from some barbecue place, which was also a signal that my sense of taste had probably returned to normal. I had a moment to think that was spectacularly good timing, when we turned the corner to the place where we could actually see the various restaurants. Lots of places that could have meant a cheap, fun meal and either be a delicious family owned place or utter trash full of health code violations. A couple big chains, too, but none of them were what made me stop completely and stare.

There he was. Nobody Prime. Terry or Tommy or Timmy, or more likely none of those at all except briefly as convenience. Popping up by surprise, as coincidental as the first time I saw him at the Attic, only with a lot more menace. He looked so ordinary, unassuming, the first time, and it was only the coincidence that made me alarmed. Today, even if I never had seen his face, I would have been wary of him, because one arm of his shirt was drenched in a dark stain that continued down his arm. He was bleeding, and by the look of the knife held openly in his hand, he'd done the job himself and just stood there, arms limp but still ready to draw more blood, whether it was his or somebody else's.

That alone should have raised alarms, but nobody else in the complex was freaking out. "Hey," I said to Allie, jerking my head in that direction. "Anything stand out to you?"

"I don't know..." she said, eyes passing over the restaurant fronts and crossing right by where he stood. "Ever had Korean?"

So she didn't see him either. Or maybe she did, but she just didn't notice him, as out of the ordinary, that despite his brazenness, he was cloaked by his patron in a similar way as Allie and I were, only more powerful. There was something odd there, something I didn't twig on right away, about me being able to notice him, but it didn't hit on me, just thought that some of my wards coincidentally blocked that effect on me. But there was no coincidence in him being here, right now. Whether we hadn't actually slipped the tails and they tipped him off, or he found her another way, he was here, and it looked like he meant business. Possibly he'd hacked her phone in some mundane way...he could have been watching live as she searched for restaurants in this area and, even if all the location data her phone passed to outside monitoring was scrambled, that information was a direct request and had to be kept intact for the phone to function as intended. So, too, it might have made it through unmolested to whatever eavesdropping method he used, or the result might have. Warden protections never cover everything.

Right now, though, they still seemed to be covering me, in that I clocked Nobody Prime but he still seemed to be looking around, like a hawk scanning a field for mice. His gaze had crossed our position twice but never settled yet. So, he knew Allie would be in the area, maybe suspected a Warden with her, but his eyes didn't seem to have spotted us yet. If we got closer, he would, though. Magic could only stretch things so far.

While Allie was looking over restaurant options, I was already communing with Gnarly. The price of what I'd asked before had changed... I'm not even sure if it was for better or worse, trading one type of pain for another. Before, in the Dollar Tree, to enact my drastic escape method, I'd have had to told her, earnestly, that I thought I was falling in love with her. I probably couldn't take it back later, at least not the words, without significant punishment, but I could easily make her doubt it with my actions later, pass it off as a line, a lie, a cheap manipulation from someone she already wasn't sure she could trust. It would hurt--worst of all, hurt Allie--but it was only words. Words I told myself weren't true, a lie, what Gnarly wanted and since I was doing my best not to lie to her, abandoning that would count as a sacrifice. What Gnarly wanted now was more direct, personal... still might be possible to pass it off as part of a con, but it would be intense and a different kind of moral sacrifice. Of course, it would hurt Allie in the same way.

I already felt like a piece of shit for keeping her in the dark. Here, she was, all this time, thinking she was just on a cute walking date with a guy she kind of liked, but I couldn't respond to her in that way... not just because she was my sister, but because she was in danger. I couldn't even give her the most harmless version of what she wanted, a good time, because I was hyper-focused on the people around us, and now, now I was going to have to change things forever. I was going to have to do something vulgar, something I'd never be able to undo.

Well, I might still be able to pass it off as a scheme, manipulation, especially if I had to explain to her about magic anyway. And I was going to have to, there was no escaping that. But the act itself would still be done, would leave questions in her mind, especially if I tried to later explain to her who she was to me, if she believed me, she'd still remember this moment and perhaps be retroactively disturbed. If I was lucky, maybe, one day, I'd be able to make that up to her.

But for any of that to be possible, we had to be safe. And being hunted by a mage with a bloodletting knife out was anything but safe. "Just before we go in, one second." I took another quick look around, searching for what I needed, but Gnarly probably wouldn't have offered if there wasn't. Sure enough, I saw one, a back door to some storefront, recessed into the wall like a little alcove, covering us from view. The fewer people to see this, the less it would cost, and for this bargain, I may not have needed complete privacy, but for no other eyes on us. I pulled Allie into it, or rather led, because she followed with only a slight tug, and we were then sheltered by two walls and a closed metal door. Cigarette butts lined the ground and I knew at any moment an employee might come out of that door for a smoke break, and ruin everything, so I took a breath to say what I needed to say. The words weren't required, technically, only the action, but doing this without asking seemed more of a a violation. Or maybe less. Still, there were practical matters too. I can't believe I have to do this, I thought, and then did it. "It's just... I... I really need to kiss you right now."

That was what the magic required, my sacrifice, but it didn't mean I needed it any less. The nervous smile when she said "Okay," did something to me, too, like my heart was breaking but being held together too.

"Close your eyes." Because that was required too, both of us. This was vulgar. And I couldn't even kiss her like a sister. Our bargain had no words, but Gnarly was very clear anyway, the same kind of complete certainty you get in dreams... it couldn't be a chaste little kiss on the cheek or forehead or anything else but a passionate kiss, a moment I should never have, a line I shouldn't cross. I leaned forward, reaching for the side of her face, heart pounding so hard I thought I might burst an artery, and Gnarly would laugh and reveal it was all a cosmic joke, that that would be the sacrifice they were after all along, but it wasn't. I closed my eyes, and closed the distance as well.

Some people believe our patrons are Gods, outside time and space, omniscient of past and future, that everything they ask of us they know all the results and consequences down the line, amusing themselves playing five dimensional chess against ants. I don't know if I believed that completely, but I couldn't help but wonder if this had all been forseen, intended, plotted, weeks ago, because I'd just gotten my taste back and the first thing I experienced with it was the fleeting moment of sweetness from some remnant of flavored lip gloss, and I could swear I still tasted grains of cinnamon sugar from the churro, but soon that taste was followed, overwhelmed, by that of my sister's eager tongue. It's weird to consider that a flavor, but it was, along with an intense, intimate sensation that was like a revelation for my starving taste buds... any flavor would do, would feel special, but this one intoxicated. I pulled her body towards into mine and worked some magic, violated the laws of time and space and maybe some of decency as well.

Sounds faded away, left by new ones, the slight hum of nearby electronics that you don't even notice unless you're expecting it, and then one that anyone would notice, a soft, confused meow, which broke the kiss, and I opened my eyes to a faint confused smile as Allie stared back at me before sliding away with delight, looking for what she must have expected was a random stray cat friendly approaching us on the street... followed by a series of growing confusion and horror as she realized that, somehow, she was inside an apartment she probably had no memories of anymore.

"What the fuck?"

Chapter 20

Allie shoved me backwards with force so surprising I almost wondered if the kiss had brought back her original memories, and she was looking at me with the sudden horror that her brother was kissing her. But no, it was something else, just the most rational explanation her mind could craft in the moment. She was in one place, and suddenly another, and she didn't believe in magic, so... "Did you... did you roofie me?" Tears of outrage or betrayal or both were in her eyes, and the question was almost a wail.

It broke my heart, both to see her distress and to think that she might think that of me. "Of course not!" I didn't attempt to approach... my instinct was to hold her try and, comfort her, but that was the exact wrong move when she didn't trust me.

"Well then what the fuck happened? Last I remember was kissing you on the street, and then when I wake up in some apartment and you're kissing me again!" That was perfectly logical a conclusion to jump to, except the universe doesn't run solely on logic. And that itself would be terrifying to some people.

"I can explain!" I promised. Though explaining was sort of uncharted territory for me. Most of the time my vulgar magic is restricted to people who know about magic already. Sure, there'd been a few times where people saw something impossible, but I found that usually people come up with their own rationalizations... and, in any event, I don't usually have to stick around for questions. I relied on denial and mystery, so I wasn't very experienced at the "yeah, that was magic, and I can prove it" talk.

But this was my sister. I knew how she thought, how she processed information. Sure, she was emotional right now, but... facts, facts would sway her. "We're both wearing the exact same clothes," I pointed out. "Nothing's been moved. They're still wet from the water main." Damp, anyway. She felt the fabric of her top, confirming, although presumably there were alternate explanations, so I continued, looking towards the window. "The sun still hasn't even set yet, so you can't be missing more than a few minutes. Check your phone if you don't believe me."

That calmed her, a little. "Did you pull me inside?" she asked, uncertainly even though that explanation didn't really add up either. The door was metal on the outside, and my apartment door was wood, and we were on the ground floor before, but now several floors up, though she might not have been close enough to the window to really notice that. Instead, she followed my suggestion and retrieved her phone from her purse, looked at the time on the lockscreen, only a few minutes since she'd checked it last, and seemed to latch onto an explanation that rendered me less evil, "Did I faint or something?"

Part of me wanted to just say yes to her, assure her that she just fainted, and that I took her inside. It was so tempting to just go with the flow with the easy explanation that meant I would leave her world undisturbed. But not only would that be a lie, it would never work, not for more than a few minutes. It's amazing sometimes you can still yearn so much for things you know aren't possible, or would never work anyway. Although, yes, there was one possible way I could make it work. With magic, I could, theoretically, violate her mind, wipe her memories or at least blur her perceptions of those things that didn't make sense with that explanation. It would be doing pretty much what she first accused me of doing, a kind of roofie, even if not done for perverted reasons. I've gone full on Warden on people who've used it like that, but this kind of thing, futzing memories just to keep secrets of magic secret, was among the uses permissible under the Accords. Still shady, but sometimes a necessary kind of shady... but when it was with my sister, I couldn't do that. Wouldn't, I mean, although possibly I also couldn't, if she had the same kind of hard-to-tweak memory as I did.

It was time for some long overdue truth, something I probably should have given her while she still knew she was my sister. "You didn't faint," I said softly but firmly. "And we didn't come through the door." She stared at me, wide-eyed, and looked like she was still hoping I was going to provide the rational explanation. But there wasn't one. "You might want to sit down." The magic had brought us pretty near my living room couch, where, in another life, Allie occasionally slept. Warily, like she wasn't sure they would be real before she first confirmed with her hands, she sank to the cushions, Smokey, my cat, hopped up from the side and began sniffing her, purring automatically, like he remembered, or at least recognized the scent as someone who hadn't been around in a long time but occasionally provided food. "I had to move us, because I realized we were being followed, and I didn't want to risk..." I stopped, worried that the very idea of us being followed might freak her out, so I switched tacks, assuring her. "We should be safe here."

She didn't looke particularly reassured, because her mind was still chewing its way around a hard impossibility, searching for a soft spot. "Moved us how?"

Allie was never going to bite through that hard candy shell to find the soft gooey center of a logical explanation though, and if she kept trying, she might break something, so I had to just get it out there. "Instantaneously. I don't do magic tricks, Allie. I do magic." She just stared at me. "So do the people who were following us, the people I'm after."

"I don't believe in magic," she said finally.

"You might want to consider starting, because what just happened was impossible by any other definition. Look at your phone's GPS if you don't believe me. We're halfway across the city..." She was lifting her phone again, and I realized, "No, wait, actually... they might be tracking your phone." I ran to the kitchen, got out my role of aluminum foil, and returned, sitting close beside her while I pulled out a long sheet. "Wrap it in this, for now."

She didn't, but she didn't access her phone, either. "So, what, you're going to tell me tinfoil protects against magic?"

"No, it makes it so no signal can get out. I've got wards on my apartment, but if they've got some sort of tap on your phone, they might be able to find us." Probably not, although the fact that I teleported here instead of taking the route I was supposed to take meant that my wards weren't quite as bulletproof as they normally would be, so I wanted to take extra precautions. My Warden powers should still be scrambling things like passively gathered location data, but if she looked up her location herself, they might see it, just like Nobody Prime might have seen the restaurants nearest her when she searched for them. Since it was difficult to explain all these nuances quickly, I just went with the simpler explanation... besides, it was best to start preparing her for how careful she'd have to be later. I gently pulled the phone from her hands, and since she didn't resist, wrapped it in the foil. "So, a simple Faraday cage. I'll cleanse it more thoroughly with magic, later, but just, for now, please, just trust me."

Allie still seemed to be in the shell-shocked, disbelieving state, but she was still my sister, and pointed out what she saw as the flaws in my story, "I'm not sure that's going to work as well as you think. If they were following my phone, surely they already saw it shoot across the city. And anyway, why would they be following me, if you're all wizards, wouldn't they more likely be following your phone?"

"I told you, I'm protected. And they're not after me, Allie. I don't know why, but they were definitely following you. I don't think they even knew I was there, most of the time. Probably know now, of course, but don't worry, this place is secure."

She looked at me with lost eyes. Resting waif face, maybe, but I felt it more this time, with her clear confusion, and the words, "Why would they be following me? I'm nobody."

Not the time to explain why that word made me want to flinch. "I don't know yet. But I promise I'll take care of them."

"No," she said after a moment's thought, going for denial, rejection rather than confusion. "This is too crazy. I mean magic? You're laying actual magic on me? It makes no sense."

"I know it's hard to accept, Allie, but..."

"So, show me some of this magic, then. Something beyond what a good stage magician could do."

"The teleportation wasn't enough?"

"I'm still not sure I buy that was actually teleportation. And you took my phone away so maybe this is all..." She left the thought unfinished, but presumably the idea that this was some elaborate deception. "Do it again. While I'm watching."

"I don't think I can, I..."

"That's convenient. Then turn invisible. Or..."

"Just..." I held up a hand. "...listen, okay? I'll prove it, but first, you need to understand. Magic... well, it's a lot more like being a warlock than a sorceror. I've made a connection with some... thing. Beyond our normal conception of reality. And mostly, I ask for it what I want. Sometimes it doesn't want to play along. And when it does, there's always a cost. The more blatant, the more... vulgar a spell is, the more it costs."

The suspicious look was back. "You stole that from Mage: The Ascension."

"Well, yes, the terminology, but it's how it actually works." And possibly the game stole that term from real mages who use it, since I'm not the only one. "Most spells involve tweaking probability, making unlikely things happen. Things that can be dismissed as coincidence. If I'm going to do something that convinces you... I'm going to have to take some extreme measures. Give me a second." I looked around, searching for a suitable vessel for demonstration, then when I found one, clutched my amulet to ask Gnarly what it would cost me. I probably didn't need the amulet, strictly speaking. Usually when you cast one spell, your patron's attention--or some infinitely fine shard of it that's still a hundred times more than usual--is already on you for a while, they know you're likely to ask for more, soon, and give more in sacrifice. Communing is much faster in such instances... but, often, I do it anyway, like a habit, the slight pain of it reminding myself not to make deals without being aware of the cost. And, I suppose, it looks more impressive to someone who doesn't know the ins and outs of magic.

"Okay." I stood up, went to the other side of the table, like I was going to show off, which I guess I was, because Gnarly was willing to comply. What I asked for was nothing new. It was almost to the point I could do it as a cantrip, though Gnarly wasn't quite at the level of letting me do it on my own, and the level of sacrifice varied with their whim. This time... well, it had to cost more because of another observer, but at least I guessed that meant it would make a good show. My heart started to race, this thing I'd dreamed of long ago, this previously taboo thing, showing my sister some magic, opening her eyes to a world she'd never be able to forget. Of course, it required some ugliness, and I whipped out my bloodletting knife, extended the blade. "Don't worry," I said, as she had the quite natural reaction of drawing back upon seeing a knife. "It's not for you. I told you, there's a cost. If you want me to show you, I've got to pay in blood." My eyes fell on the grey beast, who sat now on the arm of the couch. "Sorry Smokey."

"No!" she yelled, and moved to block my access to it, or scare the cat away. Probably should of thought of that. She must have thought...

I wasn't going to do that. Instead, I made a quick slice on my shirt-covered opposite arm, between elbow and shoulder. I felt the cold sting, the burning fire as I cut through my shirt and just barely pricked the skin beneath, just the shallowest of nicks, but enough for blood. I let it pool on the blade then flicked a drop in the cat's direction while trying to hold the sigil Gnarly put in my mind in the forefront of my consciousness. Smokey was mid-jump, having been startled by Allie's protective dash more than my actions, although the drop of blood itself was normally enough to startle and unnerve him, hence my preemptive apology. Luckily, the blood didn't have to hit the target for it to take effect... which was dramatic to someone who'd never seen something impossible. The cat froze, mid-movement.

It was like paused a video of Smokey, only three dimensional. So more like somebody replaced him with a taxidermy copy, especially since gravity didn't suspend and he toppled on his side, like a statue. His eyes didn't move, didn't blink, didn't need to. Fur, if you were to touch it, still felt soft but was stiffer to move, since the underlying skin and muscle wouldn't shift with the ease of living tissue. I was used to this sort of thing. But to somebody who hadn't ever seen it before, it must have been freaky. Allie went to the frozen cat, extended a finger towards him, like worried what might happen if you tapped him. "What did you do to him...?"

"He's fine," I assured her. "It's like a Hold Person spell, sort of. Except he won't even notice what happened." Mostly. Aside from the drop of blood, the sudden movement of things around him tended to startle Smokey when he came out of it, but it was a short term confusion. Most animals find coping with magic easy, by virtue of not really giving a fuck about stuff that doesn't impact their immediate needs for food or sleep or eating. No lingering existential questions get brought up when you cast a spell on an animal. I picked the little shit up to demonstrate to Allie that this wasn't a purely visual effect, and that his body was rigid like a statue, not merely paralyzed. I could lift him by his tail, if I wanted. Though I wasn't going to demonstrate that, and set him gently down on the floor again because, "It'll wear off in a minute or two. More if we're not watching." Had it on him for a couple hours to keep him safe and quiet when I moved him out of Liz's place to mine, but he was curled up into a near little oval, asleep when I cast the spell, which helped. "The observer effect is always a factor."

"And you can just do that? To anyone? At any time? A few drops of blood and boom, they're helpless?"

"Not exactly... there are a lot of elements that go into any spell that can affect the cost, but, generally speaking, animals are easier to cast on than people." I figured I might as well explain, "And by easier, I mean the sacrifice my patron asks for would scale up dramatically for a human. It's not just Smokey's size, but complexity, I guess it affects the attention from these powers that it takes, to temporarily suspend everything and then resume as though nothing happened." Or maybe it didn't take much at all, if the Simulation Hypothesis was true, maybe Gnarly just needed to press the pause button on one particular process. If so, it's only social reasons to charge more. Regardless, "I've never done that particular spell on a humans." I've certainly had cause to restrain people before, but there are always less all-encompassing ways to do it. "Theoretically I could, but even if I wanted to, I probably wouldn't want to pay the price when there are better ways to take someone out of the action." Though I've paid more for effects today than freezing one of our stalkers might have taken, if they weren't mages themselves. "This..." I waved to the frozen cat. "I don't do a lot, but... well, being a cat owner sometimes requires tasks that go a lot easier if the cat doesn't move." Even in those cases, a simple sedative spell usually does the trick better. But it's convincing if you need to show someone a magical effect.

"And you..." she looked at the spot of blood where I cut myself. I had already folded up my knife and put it back in my pocket, but it must have lingered in her memory "You have to cut yourself for magic? Always?"

"Not cut, no. There's almost always a sacrifice. Anything that causes pain or a sense of loss or stress can fuel a spell, whether physical or emotional. Physical is usually better, but that can take many shapes. Blood... well, oddly enough it's usually the least painful option. It hurts, but not as much as other things I could do. Like I might be able to fuel the same spell by slamming my fingers in a door, or rubbing cayenne in my eyes, or just accept a few minutes of sourceless blinding knee pain. And sometimes there's a kind of negotiation, offer and counter offer. Sometimes Gnarly's set on a particular price, but blood is usually a safe bet. I think it's special to them, on some kind of symbolic level." Every time I say something like this, or like 'this type of spell is more expensive than that' I try to stay conscious that I'm only making inferences, but I don't see the whole pattern. Maybe can't see. I'm like a guy in a dark cave, feeling something ropey and guessing that it's the trunk of an elephant and not the body of a snake, or even one tentacle of a massive octopus beast that would drive me mad if I saw it. Of course that consciousness didn't stop me from making those guesses, because they could end up being right and helping me. But who knows, really? They don't actually talk in words, and they don't explain themselves. For a lot of magic, you just go by feel... and what buys a spell for one mage won't always be the same for another, so it's no surprise we all wind up with different theories.

"And when you brought us here...?" she asked.

I bit my lip, not sure I wanted to go into the price I paid here and now. So I deliberately misinterpreted her. "Yeah, sorry about that. I needed your eyes closed too, and I didn't really have time to explain..." Maybe she was going to call me on it, ask what I sacrificed then when she didn't see blood, but Smokey sprang to life then, startled momentarily by the two of us suddenly so close, and darted off into the bedroom. Allie was pretty startled too, by the sudden unexpected movement, and followed the cat's path... if I knew her, still trying to find some logical explanation.

Finally, after a second, she aid, "You have time now." She got up, returned to the couch and sat down, her doubts might not be gone, but at least the show of magic made her willing to consider that I wasn't crazy. "So, explain. How do you know someone was following me? I didn't see anybody."

I also sat down, although on the other side of the couch, not too close, I didn't want to spook her. Might happen anyway, once she got over the initial freak out and really started looking around. Since I wasn't exactly preparing to bring anybody home, I had some things out from the wards and other precautions I was trying to put in place this morning, a broken mirror, a blood-stained cloth... but at least that included a box of bandaids, so I took one and started applying it to the cut and hoped she'd be distracted by the explanations. "That's... kind of the point. Some of them, you might have seen if you knew what to look for, but even I didn't notice without a little help. But right before I pulled you here, I saw... whatever his name is, that guy you have that class with on Tuesday. I was lucky I spotted him before he spotted us, because he was committed to something. He had his knife already out, and he was bleeding from whatever spells he cast to get there. You looked right at him, but you didn't notice him. Neither did anyone else there."

"But you did. Because you're a wizard too?"

"Not quite. I have a few extra defenses, because I'm a Warden. It's kind of like a magic cop, I guess? Only not exactly. Basically I'm empowered to investigate people who are violating the Accords... breaking the rules mages have agreed on for centuries. I thought that he might be one of those people, but I couldn't act until I was sure. Now I'm sure."

"What did he do?" she asked. "I mean, it wasn't just following me, because you were investigating him before that."

True, although technically I had started looking into him because I was worried he was following her, somehow, through a complete rewrite of her personal history. "There's not a lot of direct oversight in the mage community, but there's some. The Council keep track of who's operating in the area and who's being introduced to magic, and have at least one Warden in each district to reign in abuses... and all mages in the district need to contribute some pain into keeping the systems--that allow that--in place. They might ask me to bring to heel an unaccounted-for mage now and then and nobody gets hurt if they're willing to follow the rules and pay the tithes, but there's always people who think they can go underground, recruit their own power base, use the promise of initiation into magic to start a cult devoted to them, or to divide the burden and work some seriously distruptive magical shit." Like summoning a meteor strike on a city. "I don't know this guy's end goal, but one thing's clear, he has been gathering a group of other mages... I counted at least three lurking around, passing off the task of tracking you. And, worst of all, they're Nobodies."

"They're not on the official list or whatever?"

"No. I mean, they're not, but it's worse. There's a thing mages can do. Extreme. Sometimes it's a sacrifice to their patron for something big, and sometimes, the worst case, is when it's their actual objective. They become what we call a Nobody. Their patron completely erases them from the world. Every historical record. Every memory. No living soul, not even family, not even other mages, remember they even existed."

She blinked a few times, trying to grapple with that concept... at first I thought she was at a loss for words, maybe having some inherent sense of what had happened to her, but she finally came out with, "You'd have to have a really shit family to do something like that."

I wasn't ready to argue the point. "It's also forbidden by the Council. It's one of the few Accord violations where they demand the death of the mage involved. I mean, there's a little leeway if the new Nobody immediately presents themselves to the Council, because, sure, maybe their patron had them in an impossible situation, and the only deal they would accept to save them from a physical death was a kind of social one. But if they try to hide their condition, the Council has to assume it was done for darker motives. After all, nothing can possibly verify any story a Nobody might give about what happened." Even presenting yourself is no guarantee they'll trust and forgive. If Gnarly had demanded I become a Nobody to stop that meteor, save my sister and a million other people, I'd have done it... but the Council would have no reason to believe I was a former Warden in good standing. Even if they conspicuously didn't have a Warden, it would be just as logical to assume I'd erased their last one, or maybe that I was one but I'd committed some other unforgiveable sin and became a Nobody to escape sanctions. At the very least, they'd probably imprison me until they could get a new Warden installed and permanently sever my connection to my patron, and it might just be easier to arrange my death. After all, as a prisoner, I might escape, but if I didn't exist, no one would be looking for me. There are tons of magical ways to dispose of an inconvenient body.

"No," she said after a moment. "I don't buy it. Why would anyone like that bother following me? And I've known him at least since the beginning of the year!"

The 'why now' was indeed an important question, left implicit. I still didn't have a good answer for that, but I needed to try. "It's possible I sparked him into taking some action. I don't know. They didn't know I was there today, but one of them might have seen me on campus earlier, recognized me. That's the way it is with a Nobody, one might carry a longstanding grudge against me even if I don't remember him." Even though the Estrangement Nobody Prime rode through to let him remember Allie should have removed memories of such a grudge, there was so much I didn't know I couldn't take it for granted, and his cult might have been recruited after the meteor. "Or he figured out a Warden was onto him some other way. Maybe one of them even recognized Haley."

"Oh, of course, now Haley's a wizard too?"

"I told you I brought her on to assist with my investigation," I reminded her. That could have been a fatal mistake. She had worked with Wardens before, and now I worried that maybe that was enough for a rep among certain circles. I'd hoped her abilities and the fact that she came from outside the district would have mitigated risks, but I was starting to regret not handling everything alone... even if it was only because of her glasses that I realized the danger in time to act. "Anyway, it might have nothing to do with us... it could just as easily be that this guy's plans finally reached a stage where he was ready for some blatant action." I looked her directly in the eye to try and impress on her how serious this was. "But the point is, you're in danger now. I will protect you, Allie. I swear it. No matter what I have to sacrifice, I'll do whatever it takes to keep you safe. But I'm going to need your help."

"What do you need me to do?"

"My apartment's warded, so there should be no way they can find you here... unless they have something on your phone, or some other mundane tracking device on you." I'd have to check that soon. In the meantime, I had a pre-made enchanted candle that would proof the place against non-wired outside signals... I'd never really used it before because... well, it's a candle, so both inherently time-limited and cat-unfriendly, but also because the long ride home, following the usual protocols took care of any bugs on me. We kind of skipped that this time around, so I knew I'd better break it out. I was pretty sure my normal wards should still cover us from that kind of thing for a few minutes at least, scramble our location, but it wouldn't hold up to anything sustained if we stayed in one place. I moved to the shelf I kept it on, brought out my lighter, and set a small flame, burning my thumb in the process. Couldn't follow the 'don't sacrifice your hands' rule here, but it was only pain to spark the already embedded spell, not serious damage. Once it was aflame, I shook my hand a few times to work through the pain and continued, "So I just need you to relax and be willing to chill here for a while."

"So, what you need is to, what, spend the night with you in your apartment by candlelight?" she asked, her voice a little dubious. "Is cooking me dinner part of the plan, too, or do we get takeout?"

"The candle's a spell," I tried to explain. "Blocks any signals in or out. But yeah, we can get something delivered. Anything you want, on me." Or I could cook, but I didn't have a lot on hand right now.

"How exactly are you going to order food if the candle blocks all signals?"

"Well, it blocks signals through the air. I have a landline, it won't block those. It's just to disable any trackers that might be on you. There probably aren't any," I hastened to add. There shouldn't be, or there'd be no need for an aura, but I did need to double check. "But the candle gives me time to make sure. After I take a few precautions, you can make any excuses you need..."

"Wait, excuses?" The lightly amused, almost flirty tone vanished, like it had finally sunk in. "How long do you expect me to hide out here?"

"I don't know. I'll inform the Council, and they'll round up some help." Various members of the Council did have employees who were good for... handling problems, shall we say. I'm sure the Heavy had some people like that, at the very least. Though with a Nobody infestation they might call in Wardens from other districts, just for the extra expertise, and that could take longer. "Might be a few weeks."

"Weeks!?" With that strangled cry I realized, of course, that I spooked her, that no matter what stories I told her, she wasn't prepared to spend weeks in hiding based on them.

Who would be, honestly? Maybe if it was someone they really trusted, or seen the danger themselves, but... that wasn't where we were. So I quickly backtracked... lied, maybe, in my heart, but a white lie at the very least. "Probably not that long," I suggested instead. "Maybe weeks to get rid of all of them, but I bet you'll be able to get back to your normal life before then. I'll just get some more wards in place, maybe arrange some discreet bodyguards..." She seemed to be calming at this, even as I was mentally kicking myself for crossing that line into outright lying that I had been trying to avoid. Maybe if it was a hope that came true, it wouldn't count. "But you should stay completely out of sight at least for a day or so, until we can takedown the easy targets and make the rest more worried about us than accomplishing... whatever they were planning."

"I don't know, Cal," she said. "This all seems so..." She didn't finish, instead said, "If it wasn't for what you did with the cat I'd think you were a nutcase. And maybe you are. Even if magic was real, that doesn't mean everything else you're saying is true."

"I wouldn't lie to you Allie, not about something like this." But how could she know that?

"Then prove it. You've got magic, right? Conjure up some kind of image of the past, show me the people who were following me."

"That's... actually pretty tricky."

"Really? Trickier than teleporting two people from one part of the city to another? More magic than completely freezing a small animal?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact. The past is a little slippery. Hard to grab hold of once the moment's gone." I assume our patrons must have some ability to view the past, otherwise how could they alter reality so seamlessly? It should therefore be easy to direct that image to some mirror or something, like any other scry, and so show it to us, but I've only rarely heard of mages being allowed to see directly into history... and those are more rumor and legend than recorded cases. Which is kind of a shame. It'd make a lot of things easier, particularly for Wardens, but for some reason it's mostly off-limits. "I mean... I could show you the place we were just at. Maybe he's still there. Or maybe I could magically hack into security camera footage in the area, find something on there." Though that would take a lot of time searching, and probably more sacrifice than it was worth. "But if I could just look into the past, it'd be trivial to find these guys. And if I could do that, he'd already be found and dealt with."

"I need something, Cal. As fun as it sounds to put everything on hold to hide from wizards..." The sarcasm was hard to spot under how worried she was. "I do have a life, so I'm going to need some evidence it's really necessary. Maybe you could take me to this Council..."

"No..." I said automatically, then explained,. "I do need to contact them, but... I'd rather they not know you know about magic, I'm not entirely sure how they'd react." They might even put things together, guessing we were family, from the way we look. But as for proof that would satisfy her, there had to be something... "Pictures! I can make pictures, direct from my memories! They're a little interpretive, but... maybe you might have seen these guys around campus, too."

"Okay..." It wasn't exactly dripping with confidence in me, but she was willing to give me a chance, so I rushed to get some stuff from my supplies chest. Which I keep under my bed, and Smokey almost tripped me to death on the way into the bedroom before escaping back into the kitchen.

I keep the chest hidden from casual sight, even though there isn't anything particularly valuable inside. I've also got another, stand-up cabinet stashed in the closet. Another mage raiding either of them would get some use out of what's inside but nothing more than they could buy if they just stole my TV and sold that. I don't hide them because they're particularly suspicious looking... at least, there's nothing disturbing like strange idols or weird vials of bubbling potions that you might expect in a mage's stash. There's maybe a little incense in the cabinet, but everything else is pretty mundane. Really, it's just storage for some high quality materials that can be imbued with magic or destroyed to fuel stuff and I don't really want to invite questions where I might have to lie, so I keep them out of sight. I don't know if my sister ever snooped in my room while I wasn't home--before she'd forgotten me--but if she had, she was more likely to suspect that I had secret nerdy crafting hobbies rather than that I was up to anything otherworldly. Maybe the drawer of mirrors in the cabinet would have confused her most. I started off by grabbing one of those first, just in case I needed to scry or do something else where it would work as a focus, and threw it on the pillow, but this time I was mainly there for some fancy paper, brushes, and paints which were all in the chest that I heaved out from underneath my bed. I wasn't actually going to paint their pictures with the gear, they were just a good symbolic link and sacrifice. You want to make images, it helps to use something designed for making them, just like if you want to see something unseen it helps to use something designed for looking at things through. Gnarly and the other patrons don't need these anchors, I assume, but I think they use it to help us wrap our brains around them, in ways that we might be able to cantrip the same effects later. I possibly could have done that this time, not involved Gnarly at all to generate the images I wanted. I'd done it before, like when I made the picture of the Nobody to pass around campus, but, for a few reasons I decided I'd rather do a quick commune with Gnarly. Mostly because I was buying in bulk, copying several different memories onto paper in one shot. Doing it one at a time might have worked just as well, but I didn't want to fuel them each with a separate quantity of headache.

When I checked in, Gnarly was amenable to swapping it, offering to do it for a few minutes of dizziness and a little under ten of disabling hand pain. And the materials themselves, of course. I probably could have spent time negotiating--I don't like taking my hands out of play--but... the duration was short, I was in a safe place, and whatever was offered if I balked was likely to be longer term and probably would involve more fucking knee pain. Or, almost as important to me just then, visible self harm in a way that might freak Allie out. Here I wouldn't have to slam my fingers in a door or cut myself, this pain would be internal, automatic, and mostly related to movement. I wondered briefly how aware Gnarly was that I had guests, and who those guests were--or used to be... and then immediately tried to put it out of my mind. The magic involved invading my consciousness anyway, I didn't want any errant thoughts in there. Everything might be fine as long as I absolutely did not think about an elephant, so to speak.

I put the papers in a pile, the brushes on top, then the paint jars and rolled the paper slightly to carry it all in one hand while I grabbed the mirror. Is there something I'm forgetting? It felt like there was, but I was pretty sure I had everything the spell needed, so I decided my mental To-Do list was just thinking ahead to the cleansing I'd need to do on the phone. Everything for that was in the living room, so I returned to the couch. I put everything on the table, and opened my mind to the spell that was being prepared, awareness flooding my mind of the exact procedure Gnarly needed to follow to make my request manifest in the world. I'd guessed most of it, but the devil's in the details. "Okay. I'm going to need to concentrate to get clear images," I warned her. "So please try not to talk once I actually get started." I decided I might as well be up front with her, too. "And I'm going to be a little useless for a couple minutes afterwards. If you really don't trust me and want to get out of here... well, I'm not actually going to stop you regardless, but I'd have a hard time even moving right away, so if you decide that's your best shot, please..." If that was true, begging now would not help either, I realized mid-plea, so I decided to turn it into a weak joke. "At least make sure you close the door so Smokey doesn't get out too?" She didn't match my faint smile, but did give me a nod, and I looked towards my tools.

"What exactly are you doing?" she asked, despite my earlier request for concentration, so she clearly didn't think I started yet.

Luckily, I hadn't. I was just opening all the little paint bottles. They were the little kind that they sell to paint miniatures. Overpriced ones, too, naturally, just as the brushes were fine quality ones. "Magic runs on sacrifice. When you're sacrificing--or enchanting--physical things, breaking them is often part of the process. Or, in this case, rendering them more or less valueless." I lay the papers in a stack, and just dumped the paint on them, mixing them not with an eye to create some unique color but just to create a mess. What I ended up, after I swirled them around with various brushes, with was a bit of a dark grey with sparkles, from the metallics I had in the mix. The brushes, once I'd mixed everything, I just put in the empty paint containers, not just contaminating the remaining color in there with the muddy mess but also ruining the brushes themselves, not even allowing them a rinse in a glass of water. Which was probably for the best anyway, sometimes the price of spells like this included drinking the paint water and it's not a pleasant experience. "This is all effectively trash now... except the value my patron extracts out of it, and gives back. Far less than a real artist could get out of this stuff, I'm sure. Now, it's concentration time." I plunked my left hand right in the goopy mess, loosely grabbed my amulet, and closed my eyes, murmuring as words of magic flowed through me. Don't think of an elephant, don't think of an elephant.

Some people, from what I understand, have a great ability to visualize things, and bringing forth a memory is more or less like putting a picture up in your minds eye. For me, holding an image in my head long enough to generate an image is always a struggle, and doing multiple ones is even trickier, it's like the image is projected on water, and the slightest stray thought or emotion caused ripples that make it unintelligible except for the mere concept of it. And my mind tends to wander. Still, I did my best, brought to mind some of the sights of the day, starting with Nobody Prime, standing there in the parking lot. Then, Goatee Nobody, while I waited by the Porta-Potties, Phone Nobody as we passed by him in the water, Masked Nobody from when I spotted him just as we stopped inside the Dollar Tree, where I gave my sister my class ring for the second time. The first time... No, damn it, don't think of the elephant. You have a job to do.

I felt the magic flow through me, like a rush of adrenaline, combined with that feeling where you stand up too fast and you're about to black out for a moment. Only instead of lasting only a moment, like usual, the head-spinny effect continued even after I was sure the magic was done. My hand didn't hurt... but I knew this specific pain would be joint- and muscle-based, that I could minimize it by not moving my fingers. I could pull my hand away from the paper, and as long as I kept the hand itself motionless, it was okay. "Okay," I said, trying to grab my bearings. "The images should be in place." There's something you're forgetting, ran through my mind. Not in those words, per se, but a feeling that can be summed up by them. I quickly realized that the condition of my hands would prevent me from peeling apart the pages and demonstrating the effect.

I tried to force my fingers into shape to grip the edge of one part of the paper, and found myself completely incapable, swore softly. "I think you're going to have to peel the papers apart." I held up my hands. "I won't be able to move these for a bit." I shifted sideways on the couch, giving her room to sit back down beside me. I was going to move farther but I unthinkingly put my hand down to help lift myself up and regretted it with another burst of pain, so I just shifted and winced. Allie sat beside me, shooting me a concerned look at my distress, then peeled off the first paper, the one completely drenched with paint. She grabbed it gingerly, by a corner that wasn't full of paint, but was immediately faced with the problem of what to do with a wet drippy art project. "Uh, just put it anywhere," I suggested. "Don't worry, I can get a new table." Or clean it with magic, more likely. The table wasn't part of the terms of the sacrifice, so I could do that. She placed it on near where I'd left the brushes, folding it over so paint fell-against paint. "No, fuck off, Smokey," I warned, as the Grey Beast had circled around to try and smell what we were doing. I waved my other hand in his direction, and, maybe fearing another freeze spell, retreated again. That motion didn't hurt much. Neither did my attempt to wipe some of the paint off my hand and onto a pillow I didn't care much about. Both carried some pain, mostly from my hands attempts to move naturally along with the motion, but I could cut them off before it got too bad.

I don't know if what Gnarly gave me was actually temporary arthritis, but it felt like I always imagined that would feel like. Picture yourself wrapping your hands and fingers in clear plastic wrap, like you use to keep food fresh in the fridge. You get it to a point where it doesn't really hurt, but everything's stiff and it's hard to move. You can feel a little give in it, and it gives you a false hope feeling that maybe if you really tried, you could push through that artificial restraint and move them the way you want them to, but the moment you actually put in any effort, suddenly the minor, endurable pain informs you moving is out of the question. Not from constriction, directly, but it's like you suddenly discovered that your very bones had barbs in them and the stiffness was almost irrelevant, maybe even protective, because the real problem was that when you move too far, it's tearing your flesh on the insides. And, like any injury be it a sour muscle or a bit lip, when it's not hurting, you often just completely forget until you fall back on an old habit that's temporarily excruciating. Worse, even if you don't forget, it's hard to resist just... trying it repeatedly anyway, just to see if it really is as bad as you thought, or if maybe the injury had completely healed in the last thirty seconds since you tried. In my case it's quite possible relief would come as quickly as that, I still had minutes to suffer through. Yet still I frequently found myself flexing my fingers as far as I could before the pain warned me away.

"So, what's this supposed to be?" Allie asked, looking at the next paper in the stack. Some of the paint had bled through, or at least it looked that way, leaving a smear that might have resembled a Rorshach blot.

"Other side," I prompted, and when she turned this paper open, it was an image, as though the bleed through of the blob the other side of paper had somehow, against all odds, formed into a clear line-drawing of Nobody Prime. "Each layer should be another one," I said, proud of my work--or Gnarly's. The images were based on my own mental imagery, so I might as well be proud of myself, though. Sure, it wasn't photograph quality, but I thought it looked like a pretty good artist's rendering. It captured not only a good enough approximation of his face that you'd recognize him from it and could tell he was looking for something, but also--sadly in the same shades, monochrome blobs-the blood dripping off his knife, invoking a sense of menace.

"That's him..." she said, with wonder, or maybe suspicion that this was some kind of elaborate David Blaine close-up magic scam, I couldn't tell, as something intense hit me.

I still need to sacrifice some blood, I thought, or felt, was filled with a firm conviction at any rate, out of nowhere, even though it wasn't part of the deal. Part of this deal.

"Shit... shit... shit shit shit... I forgot." I need to draw blood. My time was almost up, for the burst pipe outside the Dollar Tree. When I touched the pillow grabbing the mirror, it triggered the timer, and now the geas was coming due. I need to cut myself.

"What's wrong?" Allie looked back at the picture of Nobody Prime, as though trying to figure out what I saw that spooked me.

It had nothing to do with that, though. I need to cut myself soon. But... oh, fuck you Gnarly. I wasn't communing, so I didn't think he actually heard me, but I almost wished he did. That's how geas-like effects often manifested, you can often forget almost entirely about them until you're close to breaking them, and then it's like an instrusive thought that keeps taking over everything else. My mind felt more like a hamster wheel, I could force my brain onto some other topic for a short time but before long it would circling back to the same thought. I need to sacrifice blood, I owe them.. And the circles were tightening, the intrusive voice getting louder, until it would be all I could think about. For now, there was still time to think of other thoughts that were important for me. I need to cut myself. But not in front of Allie... I need to draw blood, soon. Gnarly's gotta let me negotiate around this, right? But did that seem like something he would do? I owe them my blood though, I already promised. BUT I CAN'T FUCKING HOLD A KNIFE.

I stood up quickly... or tried to, anyway. The dizziness I'd been experiencing hadn't been so bad as long as I was seated and not moving much, but when I tried to get up, I found myself quickly stumbling, and falling on one knee, my other, painted-stained hand trying to grab the table... succeeding, but at the cost of enough pain to make my face contort. I need to cut myself. But I was going to be stuck like this far longer than I had. Shit... Allie took my other hand, which also hurt, but less, and I could see the worry on her face and wanted to be brave for her, but I need to make a blood sacrifice, now. I let go of the edge of the table and tried to reach for my knife, but I couldn't make my fingers close around it. And there was no way I'd be able to hold it to make the required cuts.

I just couldn't manage it, mechanically speaking. Of course, thanks to Gnarly, I wasn't alone, either. I felt tricked into something I never wanted, like this was some engineered scheme, the pet manipulated once again into doing something stressful but apparently amusing to the owner, like those videos where people put a cucumber behind a cat. It makes them flat out panic because their instincts said snake. I'd never done that to Smokey, but I had no illusions, my patron was absolutely the kind of jerk who would, only on a cosmic scale. Seriously, Gnarly, fuck you. "Allie... I'm going to need your help with something else."