Chapter Text
Kairi first got wind of the concept after Sora and Riku returned from the World that Never Was.
“Drive forms?”
She blinks, mumbling the words out around the popsicle in her mouth, quickly moving to catch the melting ice cream before it dripped onto her skin.
Sora had been ecstatic when he found out that Kairi could wield a Keyblade, vibrating with so much excitement that she wondered if he would float away.
“Riku and I can teach you so much!” Sora says, grabbing her hands. “We can teach you everything!!”
“We don’t know that much.” Riku interrupted dryly, handing Kairi one of the popsicles he’d bought from the store before meeting at their usual spot. But Sora wasn’t listening, rattling off every skill he could think of – elemental spells, dodge rolling, summoning spells, finishing moves, team attacks – Sora was especially excited about the team attacks. On and on he went until he mentioned the thing that caught her attention.
“Hm? Oh!” Sora brightens with recall, taking a bite out of his popsicle like a monster. Kairi’s teeth ache just from watching. “It’s – hmm, well…”
His face screws up in thought as he brings his free hand to his chin. “…It was a gift from the good fairies when they made my new clothes! It, um…whenever I was in a fight, I could rely on the power of my friends and – change.”
“Very succinct explanation.” Riku quips, and Sora shoots him a sharp glare.
“Well, I’d like to see you try and explain it!!”
“You’re the one with the freaky heart connection powers, not me, so you –”
“Hey.” Kairi says sharply. “Focus - back on track! So you’re basically saying, like – you can combine your powers? With someone else?”
“Exactly!” An easy smile spreads across Sora’s face. “You’re so smart, Kairi, I knew you’d get it. And it’s different every time – with Goofy, I just, uh – brute forced it! Yeah!” He did a few air punches, making ‘pew, pew!’ sounds for extra effect. “I felt really strong. And with Donald, I used a lot of magic. There was one I could activate all on my own, and there were – a couple other ones. With…um. Other people.”
His expression shutters some, his tone losing some of its light. At his usual spot, Riku shifts in place, looking somber as he crosses his arms tighter around himself. The two of them lock eyes, and expressions flash between them, a silent language that Kairi can’t decipher – and she was able to, before. The bright, excited air around them fizzles out, morphs into something heavier, and Kairi –
Kairi feels –
Well.
See – a year is a long time. Kairi knows that. She knows. She reminded herself of that fact between so many days of waiting, of remembering and not remembering yet still wanting so badly to be here, in this moment once again that her bones ached with it. She had dreamed of those lighthearted days spent together, playing and laughing together after school.
You just have to wait. Kairi would tell herself, standing at the shore and staring out at the play islands. Just wait – they’ll come back home, and everything will be back to the way it was.
Back to the way it was…
It’s funny – a year ago, Kairi was standing on the docks of the play islands, ready to sail out towards the horizon, not knowing that there were a thousand other worlds waiting beyond it. She had thought – it would be fine. No matter where they went, what they saw…it would be fine, because in the end, they would come back home. Home, where nothing has changed at all.
But a year is a long time. And though places can stay the same, people change. They’ve changed. And Kairi didn’t really account for that. She thought she did – she thought she was ready for it.
But here, with the reality of it staring her in the face, maybe Kairi wasn’t as prepared as she thought.
There was this feeling, between them – a rift. It reminded her of the last time she had seen Sora – a gulf spreading between them, growing wider and wider no matter how hard they reached for each other, how tightly they held on. Kairi feels it again, now, and she takes a bite of her popsicle, feeling the chill slide down her throat and settle deep in her belly.
It remains long after the popsicle is gone.
You knew this was a possibility. Kairi reminds herself, fierce. You expected this.
It makes sense – Sora and Riku have been to different worlds, seen and experienced trials she can never imagine.
And she hasn’t. She's just been here - carrying on with her life. Waiting.
So Kairi won’t press, she won’t push. She won’t make them talk if they don’t want to, even though she wants to understand. Even though she feels like an outsider, looking in on something she shouldn’t.
She clears her throat. Bites down on her bare popsicle stick for something to do as she thinks of what to say, how to clear the air. “It sounds…challenging.” She finally decides on. “Do you really think I can do it?”
The somber aura gets shaken off, slowly. Bit by bit, she watches her boys brighten back up. “Of course you can!!” Sora says easily, like there’s no doubt in the world. “I mean, Riku was able to do it, so you can too!”
“Hey!”
“What?!” Kairi rocks back onto her palms, popsicle stick almost tumbling out of her mouth in shock. “Riku?! You did??”
She gaped at him, and Riku sharply turned his head. “It wasn’t me.” He denies, stubborn. “I was just – I was just there. It was Sora, mostly.”
Kairi connects the dots rather quickly. “You made a drive form?? Together??”
“Yeah!!” Sora tucks his hands behind his head, grinning so wide his eyes crinkle in that way she missed so much. “We could only hold it for a little while, but – it was really cool!”
“Only a little while?” That sounded curious. “How come?”
“Mmm…” Sora wrinkles his nose, and at his opposite side, Riku shrugs.
“We talked about it a little bit.” He starts. “And Sora and I have come to a tentative conclusion that it probably has to do with – um. Trust. You know. Probably.”
Riku shuffles in place a little, a complicated expression twisting his face, and Sora jumps in before it got awkward. “Yeah! I mean, don’t quote me on it – but it makes the most sense to me! With Donald and Goofy – it was easy. Just like that –”
He snaps his fingers. “Like I didn’t even have to think about it. We were just…in synch, you know? With Riku…it was so new. Different. I couldn’t hold it long – but we made it count.”
The boys share a quick grin. “We talked about it.” Riku continues. “After – after the fight. Once things calmed down. We – it finally felt like we had enough time to. It cleared the air a little.”
“Maybe next time it won’t be so hard. We’ll see!”
Silent, Kairi kicks her legs back and forth. She stares at the two of them, thinking over their words. Trust…
“How did it happen?”
“Well. We were fighting Xemnas – he wasn’t done with us after all. And I –”
Sora frowns. “Riku had taken a hit for me, and I just – I reached out. Even though I was too far away. I know I was.”
He stretches his hand out, reaching towards the distant horizon of the sea. “But I reached him. I was there. And we were together.”
Sora’s outstretched hand closes into a fist. “If we keep working at it, I know we’ll get better at this! And then we can teach you, too!”
He grins at her, and his smile is so bright – stunning. It floors her, this urge to teach her, to bring her in. This confidence in her.
That’s different, too. Kairi finds her mouth opening before she’s fully decided.
“Can you show me?”
“Huh?”
Sora’s brows wrinkle, confused, and she further clarifies herself. “Your drive form. Can you show me? What it looks like.”
She leans back on her hands, chewing, chewing, chewing away at her popsicle stick – a nervous tick, if you knew how to catch it. But Sora and Riku have been gone for a long time.
“What?!”
Both boys blanch at that, which would be funny if she wasn’t feeling so – so complicated. It would be cute. But she doesn’t feel like laughing as Sora scratches his head, Riku’s face screwed up in something like embarrassment. “You mean –”
He looks around furtively. His eyes bounce nervously across the sunlit beaches, as though someone would pop out of the waves and catch them in the act of talking about magic, about other worlds. That wouldn’t happen – the play islands are abandoned, these days. After the freak storm that destroyed the islands and swept the three of them away, causing them to be missing for months, no one wanted their children to fall to the same misfortune. So no one comes here – not anymore.
“You want us to show you right now??” Riku asks, voice strangled. “I don’t – I don’t even know how – we haven’t really figured it out, I’m not sure we –”
They both look so shy, all of a sudden. Kairi has to bite at the inside of her cheek to hold back a laugh. It wouldn’t do if they felt like she was laughing at them – though she’s laughed at them plenty, before.
“It doesn’t have to be now.” She rolls her eyes, playful. “Maybe…” She draws it out, thinking it over. “On the weekend? We can spend the night here, like we used to.”
Kairi can’t stop the nostalgia that creeps into her voice; it would be a hard sell, convincing her dad that spending the night at the play islands was safe. He only just started letting her go back during the day, now that Sora and Riku have returned home. But he still folds like a house of cards to her puppy eyes, so she might be able to win in the end.
With Riku and Sora’s parents, though, it might not be as easy. But that’s fine! They’ll work it out in the end. And it appears that Sora and Riku agree with her, given the way that their faces soften with memories.
“Well…” Sora draws it out, thinking about it. “I guess that could be fine. We can give it a shot. Can’t we, Riku?”
He elbows Riku in the side, gentle, and he shrugs, ducking to hide behind his bangs. “I don’t see why not.” He concedes. “Sure. Let’s try.”
“Great!” Kairi grins at them, and they slowly smile back. “I can’t wait to see it.”
“We don’t even know if it’s going to happen.” Riku huffs. “Or if we can even go. My moms have been really, well…you know.”
Sora grimaces. “Yeah, my parents have been kind of clingy, too. I don’t blame them, though! But that does make going out on the weekend a little…difficult…”
“That’s okay!” Kairi puffs her chest out. “Just leave it to me! After I talk to my dad, I can talk to your parents with you! If I’m around, there’s no way you two will get into any trouble!”
A laugh bursts out of Sora as Riku eyes her, incredulous. “You’re the goody two shoes, now? You??”
Kairi makes a face at him. “Well, who else was gonna do it? Certainly not you two, running off all over the place!!”
The playful bickering they fall into is familiar – so familiar that Kairi feels the knot in her chest give some, making it easier to breathe. This, at least, is familiar. If she closes her eyes, it almost feels like that time apart never happened. So much has changed between them – it’s inevitable, that dreaded change - but at least this is still the same.
-o-
They go to the beach on a Saturday night two weeks later.
It took a lot of work, but their parents caved in the end, after plenty of convincing and multiple promises that yes, they would be staying on the play islands and yes, they’ll text and call when they’re leaving, when they made it to the island, when they’re about to sleep –
Anyway. It worked out – that’s what matters.
Kairi’s eyes slide shut as the warm wind tugs at her hair, peace she hasn’t felt in days settling over her shoulders like a soft blanket. She hoists her overnight bag higher on her shoulder, kicking off her sandals and stepping into the shallow waters, curling her toes deep into damp sand as warm water swishes and swirls around her ankles.
“Kaiiiiriiii!”
She looks up at Sora’s call to see him a few feet away, waving his hands wildly. “Come on!!” He yells, cupping his hands around his mouth. “Let’s hurry and set up the treehouse!! Riku’s already gone up! And then we can go swimming!!”
Part of her wants to remind him that wasn’t what they were here for, not really – but that wasn’t entirely true. It’s not wrong to want to have a little fun beforehand. So Kairi smiles, and turns to scoop up her shoes and follow Sora to the treehouse.
Riku was already inside, just like Sora said, and was laying down blankets and pillows, muttering to himself about the possibility of making a blanket fort. A fresh wave of nostalgia crashes over Kairi, making her want to fall to her knees, because how many weekends did they spend, just like this? Building blanket forts together and dreaming, making up stories about hundreds, thousands of worlds – stories that don’t come anywhere close to the reality of it.
When Sora and Riku were gone, Kairi spent so many nights staring at the stars, unable to believe that each one was a world.
She had wondered which star was a world Sora and Riku were in. If she figured out a way…could she have found them?
“Alright!” Sora claps his hands together, grinning widely. “Now that Kairi’s here, we can get to work on making the best blanket fort ever!! Something that’ll knock our socks off!! Right, Riku?”
He shrugs – but Kairi can catch the curve of a little smile. “Maybe. Should be okay.”
“Should! Riku, don’t forget that we’re blanket fort professionals! This is gonna be great! Now –”
Sora picks up a pillow and tosses it at Kairi, who barely catches it. “Let’s get building! I wanna go swim – it’s been ages since we’ve swam together.”
“Mm.” Kairi smiles a little, kneeling to tuck the pillow in the nest of blankets. “It has. I can’t wait – it’ll be fun! And!”
She points at them, trying to school her expression into something stern. “Don’t forget – you said you’d show me. How am I supposed to learn how to do drive forms if I don’t know how it works? I’m a visual learner, you know.”
She won’t let them off the hook; Kairi is looking forward to playing with them again, certainly – but she wants to see. She wants to understand. So she won’t let them have any room to try and back out of it.
“Ah – right! Yep!” Sora nods rapidly, and if his voice cracks a little, Kairi won’t say anything about it – this time. “I didn’t – we didn’t forget! Definitely!”
Kairi stares hard at him, wrinkling her nose. Sora grins back, and Riku is very interested in fluffing up the blankets and pillows, which were already as fluffed as they could get. Finally, she lets it lie, and smiles widely. “Great! How can I help?”
-o-
It probably has to do with trust.
Kairi has been pondering on Riku’s words, in those two weeks of waiting. On more than that – the concept in general.
Trust.
Kairi folds her arms over her knees and tucks her face there, sitting on her towel and waiting. Her hair drips silently down her back.
Closer to the shore, Sora and Riku stand across from each other, their Keyblades out. Tense. Staring at each other. If Kairi wasn’t so wound up, it would be funny, how different they looked right now – Riku, still in his swim trunks, and Sora, dressed in his gifted clothing.
“I have to wear it!” He explained when Kairi pointed it out. “I think that’s where part of the magic is!”
The air was heavy with waiting – with anticipation. Curling her toes into her towel, Kairi holds her breath and stares.
Between one blink and the next, they strike.
It feels – it’s different. But not in a bad way. Not this time.
Kairi remembers it – when they fought. It felt like a dream, seeing it – no. No.
More like a nightmare.
It had been so painful, seeing them on opposite sides – it hurt more than anything. Like her heart was being torn in two. Was it her pain? Sora’s? Or had their pain been so tightly twined in that moment that it blurred together into one throbbing mass? She didn’t know – all she knew was that it hurt.
To see the difference before her feels like relief.
They spar just like they used to, just like when they were kids – but it’s more, now. Sharper, full of moves she’s never seen before, and Kairi gapes in awe as Sora swiftly dodges a playful swipe from Riku by flipping backwards, gliding through the air with an exhilarated laugh. It makes her want to laugh with him. It looks – exciting.
One day…would she really be able to do that, too?
Sparks fly in the air every time their Keyblades clash, and Kairi can feel something in the air – a pressure that keeps growing. She wonders if it’s magic. It sets her mind wandering.
It probably has to do with trust.
Trust… She rolls the word around on her tongue, like it was a piece of candy. The corners of her mouth twitch downwards, pucker as though she’s tasted something sour. Something bitter.
I wonder, Kairi muses to herself as she watches her boys spar, just how long it took for them to trust each other again.
She wonders –
How long would it take for her to trust them again?
And that, truly, is the heart of it all, isn’t it? She didn’t want to look at it head-on – she wasn’t ready. But there it was, whether she liked it or not - the end of the tangled knots wrapped around her heart.
Strike, dodge, parry, counter – back and forth Sora and Riku move across the sand, grinning wildly at each other. Kairi twists her fingers together into a tight knot. Her heart rattles in her chest, unsteady.
What changed?
Sora probably doesn’t remember, but –
I can’t help?
You’d kind of just be in my way.
How can she forget?
What was different now? What changed? Before, when all she wanted to do was help, she wasn’t even given a chance. But now – is it because she has a Keyblade now? Is she more worthy, now that she has a Keyblade – tangible proof that she can fight now, that she won’t just be in the way? Do they see her as more of an equal now, because of it? As someone capable of standing with them?
This time – I’ll fight.
That feeling – magic, it has to be magic – increases in the air, and it settles along with the heavy stone in the pit of Kairi’s stomach.
Strike, dodge, flip – more sparks were coming off their Keyblades, now. Bright blue, floating in the air for a moment before drifting into the sea, glowing beneath the churning waves and fading away. It reminds Kairi of those rare, magical nights on the beach, watching algae light up and swirl around them at every touch before vanishing into the water.
Something was happening – or, about to happen. She should focus. Kairi should pay attention – this is all for her, after all. She asked for this to happen. But she can’t. She can’t, musing over this quiet hurt that has nestled in her heart unaware, unnoticed.
You’re the one who’s changed, Kairi.
Is it in a good way, now? She asks herself, opening and closing her hands repeatedly before curling them into tight fists. Is it a change that’s wanted? Since who I was wasn’t wanted, before.
No, no, that’s not right to think – that isn’t fair. Sora and Riku…they did their best. They’ve done so much for her. So much, in their own ways, to find her, to save her. She can’t be upset about that. She shouldn’t. But –
She had been found, brought to safety, and then –then, when she wanted to do more, she was just…sent back home. Left behind.
I can’t help?
You’d kind of just be in my way.
Always the one getting left behind. Kairi thinks, bitter. She closes her eyes. Bites at the inside of her cheek until it stings.
“Kairi -! I think -!”
She blinks rapidly, pulling away from the dark road her thoughts were heading towards. Both boys are breathing heavily, trying to catch their breath – and surrounded by light, a dusky blue glow beneath their skin. Her mouth falls open in awe, heart leaping in excitement despite her tangled thoughts.
“It’s working.” She whispers, and they beam at her, glowing, glowing, glowing. So bright.
“We can do it!” Sora turns sharply to Riku, brimming with confidence. “Riku! You ready?”
“Yeah.” Riku smiles, then – a big, wide, smile. Wider than anything Kairi has seen in years. “Let’s go!”
Sora stretches out an open hand, waiting, and Riku instantly reaches back, grasping his hand. The light around them brightens.
“Let’s go!”
He yanks Riku in, and he lets out a laugh – loud, unrestrained, turquoise eyes so wide, like he didn’t think he could laugh like that again. It’s a sound Kairi hasn’t heard in so long. Gripping his Keyblade, Sora turns on his heel, pulling Riku along with him, pulling him close - and they moved together so easily, then. Like it was a dance.
The last thing Kairi saw was Sora wrapping an arm around Riku’s waist before the light around them bursts, turning into something blinding, making her throw her arms up to cover her face. When Kairi lowers her arms and blinks the spots out of her eyes, she sees Sora, standing alone in the surf, and –
His clothes have changed.
Gone are the blacks, and reds, and yellows – in their place is the dark blue colors of dusk, purples and greys and blues. A silver crown is nestled in his hair, and in both hands – there are Keyblades.
His and Riku’s.
Kairi quickly pushes herself up onto her knees, gaping. “…Wow.” She breathes. “That was – that was really cool!!”
Sora puffs out his chest proudly. “Thanks! I knew we could do it.”
“What does it feel like?”
“Mm…” He screws up his face in thought, swaying side to side. “It feels…more together than last time. Like I can hold it for longer. It feels like – it makes more sense.” He makes a face. “That sounds so dumb.”
“It’s not dumb!” Kairi stands, tucking damp hair behind her ear. “I can see what you’re trying to say.”
“Oh!” Sora’s face brightens. “Good. That’s good!”
Lacing her hands behind her back, Kairi paces around him and slowly looks Sora over, biting at the inside of her cheek. It had all looked…simple enough. The whole – the process of it all.
“Did it work like that in fights?” She asks lightly, and he shakes his head.
“No, no…in fights it was a little different. I just – I dunno, it’s like how I described it. I just reached for them. Not literally, but – uh. With my heart. And then it worked.” He plucks at his jacket. “The magic clothes probably have something to do with it, too, though. We’ll have to get you some!”
“We do?” She thought her regular clothes worked fine enough.
“Yeah! You and Riku! It’ll protect you better, too, keep you from getting too hurt.”
Kairi makes a vague noise. Her eyes drift down, staring at the small gap between them, the tide pushing back and forth over their bare feet.
“Kairi?”
“Yeah?”
“…What’s wrong?”
That stops her short. “Huh? Nothing’s wrong.”
Sora makes a face, so obviously not buying her answer. “Are you sure? I’m just asking ‘cause – you look kind of…sad?”
She stops herself from raising a hand to her face. “Ah – I do?”
The Keyblades sag a little in his hands – honestly, it looks like Sora’s entire demeanor was drooping. “I thought you were excited – you were, right?”
“I was! I am! I just –”
She bites at her thumb, wondering what she could say. If she could even spit out the doubts that were sitting heavy in her gut.
It probably has to do with trust.
Riku’s earlier words echo in her head, over and over and over, unending, and Kairi wants to scream at the reminder – it’s not that simple!!
Isn’t it? Isn’t it? It was simple before. As easy as breathing. – she didn’t even have to think about it. Why is it so hard now?
Too long, she’s been quiet for too long – Kairi has to say something. Anything. Her eyes dart away as she licks her lips. “I guess…” She stalls for a second, thinking on her words. “I’m excited. But – I’m also…a little afraid, I think. Do you –”
She looks up at Sora, then, eyes wide. “Do you…really think I can do this?”
I can’t help?
You’d kind of just be in my way.
She remembers how he said it – laughingly, like it was never an option, her coming along to help. Kairi can still remember the ache, the sharp stab of hurt that radiated from her chest all the way down to her stomach. She wanted to scream, to protest, to give Sora a hearty shove into the water.
But his mind was made up. All she could do was smile.
Do you really think I can do this?
Do you?
Do you?
Sora’s face screws up in confusion. “Of course I do!!” He says. “Why wouldn’t I?”
She can’t speak. You didn’t, she wanted to say. You didn’t before.
“Kairi –”
He dispels his Keyblade to reach out, grabbing her hand. His skin feels so warm against hers, humming with magic waiting to be used. “You’re going to be great.” Sora says, his voice so serious. “Riku and I, we’re gonna teach you as much as we can. And then – and then, after that, maybe we can travel together! So you can learn more that way, too! And maybe Master Yen Sid can help – but I know you can do this! Riku thinks so, too!”
He gives her hand a squeeze. “You’re gonna be the best Keyblade wielder around, just watch. And then, it’ll be the three of us – traveling and saving the worlds!”
Sora sounds – he just sounds so sure of her. So confident. The knot in her heart loosens, somewhat.
A tiny smile curves at her lips, and Kairi just lets herself – hope. For what, she didn’t really know. Perhaps that – that maybe things are finally changing in a good way. That this will work out, and she’ll be able to stand at Sora and Riku’s side and protect them. To help shoulder the weight instead of staring at the horizon and hoping. Waiting.
No more waiting.
This time…I’ll fight.
“…Alright, then.” She squeezes Sora’s hand in return. “If Sora believes I can do it, I can’t not try. Let’s do our best.”
Sora’s grin then was so bright – brighter than sunshine, brighter than any star that shined in the sky. He whoops loudly in excitement, and Riku’s Keyblade vanishes in a handful of sparks so Sora can wrap his arms around her waist, squeezing her so hard she squeaked and hauling her off her feet, spinning her around.
“Sora!!”
“Make way for Kairi, future Keyblade master!!” Sora hollers to the sky, laughing, and Kairi can’t help but laugh with him, his excitement contagious.
“You’re ridiculous – put me down!! You’re going to tri –”
Just as she’s getting the words out, Sora loses his footing, and they let out garbled yells as they tumble into the sea, a bright flash of light mixing with a wave of sea foam and blinding her.
As the lights clear from her eyes and Kairi twists herself upright, breaking the surface with a sharp gasp, she can feel two sets of arms, wrapped around her waist.
It’s the warmest she’s felt in a long, long time.