Chapter Text
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“You fainted, straight into my arms.” he looked worried but quite rightly so, she thought. His self-assured humour peeking through as he spoke again. “You know, if you wanted my attention, you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”
“Oh shu’ up.” she mumbled, pressing her palm to her forehead. “I fainted?” she asked in disbelief, the bright June sunshine flooding her office serving only to make the dull throbbing behind her eyes increase ten-fold.
“Yup.” he nodded. “I think Carisi was two seconds away from calling an ambulance but I managed to hold him off.”
She sucked in a breath, her hand pressed to her abdomen. “I feel queasy.”
“Here.” he said, shoving a bottle of water and a packet of crackers into her hands and encouraging her to sit up.
She winced as he pulled her up to sit back against her desk, closing her eyes as she steadied her breathing, pressing her palms to the floor.
“‘Liv?” came his smooth voice as she blinked, focussing on his face that was rather close to hers as he knelt in front of her.
“I’m okay.” she whispered, uncapping the words plastic top and taking a few heavy gulps.
He frowned, his concern clear even though he was doing his best to temper it in front of her. “I really do think you should get checked out. I'll come with you to the emergency room.”
She shook her head. “No, no. I feel better now.”
“You could have a thing.” he replied, waving a hand in the air.
“A thing?”
“Oh I don’t know. I’m a lawyer, not a doctor. Seriously would you please see someone? This is the second time in a week, Olivia.”
She clenched her fists and swallowed back the bile in her throat. Palms sweating and pulse racing she surrendered her secret into the open. “Well, that’s the thing… I have...seen a doctor, I mean.”
“And you didn’t tell me?” his voice was pained, a look of genuine concern flickering through the green of his eyes. It occurred to them both that he wasn’t upset because she was keeping a secret but because of what it might mean. Was she seriously ill? Was this something that would take her from him? Take her from Noah? He suppressed whatever dark and threatening thoughts started bubbling into his consciousness and she placed a hand gently on his thigh, right above his knee.
“Don’t be angry, Rafa. It’s sort of a delicate subject and honestly, I didn’t know how to tell you.”
“Whatever it is, I’m here for you. You don’t have to face it alone.” he replied, his hand covering hers and breathing in deeply to calm his own panic.
“I was hoping you would say that.” she mumbled trying not to laugh, his phrasing was ironic.
He gave her a blank stare. His head tilted, that familiar way it always did when he was trying to decipher her. A look that she had grown to love dearly, the little quirk of his eyebrows.
“You remember a few months ago, at uh, Detective Sumner’s retirement party?”
His face flushed but his eyes remained looked on hers. They had sworn not to mention that night, but he couldn’t stop his mind recalling details he kept buried. Her hands nimbly unbuttoning his collar, her lips licking down his neck. A clash of teeth and tongue, and her delicious giggle as his mouth had found a sweet spot on the side of her neck. Her sultry eyes as he had peeled off his boxers and then, their naked writhing bodies moving in perfect harmony as they found mutual satisfaction, her whimpers of his name and his guttural groan at feeling how perfectly she clenched around his cock and the way she -
“Uh,” he cleared his throat (and his mind), “yeah. We, uh, agreed not to talk about it.”
She nodded slowly. “We did. And you know when I told you we were all covered?”
He frowned, not yet understanding her meaning.
“Well, doctors told me I had virtually no chance of ever getting pregnant. That’s why I told you, that night, that we didn’t need protection. Because, when a doctor tells you that then I suppose you believe them.”
“Well yeah, they’re supposed to know their stuff. You take what they say as fact.”
“Yeah I suppose you do…But anyway it turns out…that I’m pregnant.”
“I’m sorry, you’re…”
“Pregnant. Yes. About 4 months.”
He swore his heart stopped. “So that night?”
“Yes.” she nodded, looking half way between terrified and thrilled.
“And I’m…?”
“Yes.”
His mind was racing, the idea of being a father - surely not. “And you’re one hundred percent certain that-“
“For god’s sake, Rafael! I’m pregnant, and it’s yours and I’m keeping it.”
There was a tiny moment that flickered between them when she doubted him. She doubted he was as honourable as she had always thought him to be, as loving, as compassionate. She was terrified in that miniscule moment that he would reject the entire scenario, he would tell her this wasn’t what he wanted. That he didn’t want her, want it, their baby, and then, he grinned.
His mouth spilt into the most wonderful smile, his eyes shone and he grabbed her face in his hands and stroked his thumbs down her cheeks, a look of pure adoration and all-encompassing love flowing from his being.
“We’re having a baby.” a part question, part statement as if saying it loud let it sink in.
She nodded tearfully, a half sob, half laugh escaping her lips.
“‘Liv, this is…this is amazing. I can’t even tell you….I…” he paused, taking a deep breath and stealing himself for what he knew he needed to say. “God, I love you.”
Her eyes welled up as she realised her fear was unfounded, and her heart had been right to do what it did. “I love you too.”
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