Chapter Text
Harry felt extremely cold. No blanket or hearth fire was able to warm him, he had already tried it. He had even asked Madam Pomfrey about it but she had declared him completely healthy for once and sent him back to Gryffindor tower. But being with his house mates only made it worse. Not only that they told him he didn’t feel cold and he was only imagining things but whenever they touched him or were close to him he began to feel sick, almost like he was allergic to human contact.
It had been this way since he had arrived at Platform 9 ¾ in September and now, in early October, he still had found neither a reason nor a cure to his strange sickness.
On the other side of the castle Draco suffered from similar symptoms, the only differences being that he constantly felt like his body was on fire and that he knew why this was happening.
When he had turned eighteen a few months ago, he had come into his Dragon inheritance and according to his mother he would only feel content in close proximity to his destined life mate. It had started when he had arrived at the Platform 9 ¾ to attend his last year at Hogwarts, when he had first seen his mate. But considering that the Platform had been packed he now only knew that they had to be in his year because whenever he was in class he felt slightly better.
When he had found out about that, he had been relieved as it was much easier to find his mate in a few handfuls of students than in the whole of the Wizarding World or, even worse, in the Muggle World. The only problem now was that his year mates ignored him as much as possible, he was always sitting on his own in class or was assigned an unwilling partner and when he met one of them in the corridors they ignored him. The silence was often harder to cope with than insults would be. He could defend himself against any and all insults and accuses but he couldn’t do a thing to make the deafening silence and accusing looks stop.
Knowing he wouldn’t be able to sleep until the early morning hours, be it because he feared the nightmares or because he felt too hot to be able to relax enough and was only able to get a few short hours of sleep when he was completely exhausted, he made his way to the library.
The first thing he noticed approaching the library was the heat slowly subsiding to an almost normal level. He smiled. His mate had to be nearby. Opening the doors to the library the only person he saw still sitting in the light of a single lamp was Harry Potter.
What a great coincidence, he thought. The person I have to spend the rest of my life with is the only person I can never have.
Potter looked up from his studies and directly into his eyes. Draco swallowed audibly. Those startling green eyes always managed to catch him off guard and made him let his mask of indifference down for a second.
“Potter”, he drawled, Malfoy mask firm in place again.
“Malfoy, what a pleasant surprise.”
Pleasant indeed, Draco thought. It’s the first time in months I don’t feel like I’ll be suffocating from the heat any moment.
He approached the table Harry sat on and waited awkwardly for him to look up again.
“What is it Malfoy?” he asked, still not looking up.
“Can I… do you mind if I sit next to you?” Draco asked, in no way happy about his stuttering.
“Malfoy, maybe you forgot about it but we hate each other. We have this strange truce but that doesn’t mean we’re friends all of a sudden.”
“Then I’ll… I’ll just sit over there.”
Draco changed the grip on his books and trotted over to the next table, ungraciously falling into the nearest chair.
The theory of becoming an Animagus they were currently learning about in Transfiguration wasn’t really a pleasant topic for Harry, as it reminded him of the Marauders but he had vowed to himself he would give all he could to become an Animagus like his father and his friends had been. So he’d been studying for the last few nights in the library only going back to Gryffindor tower when he almost fell asleep over his notes.
But what did Malfoy want here? A silent place to study and write essays? He had his own room after all, being the only Slytherin to come back for the Eighths Year. So there would be no need to use the privilege of the Eighth Years to walk around the castle after curfew.
Harry yawned. But he couldn’t go to sleep just yet. The nightmares would come back if he slept more than the absolute minimum to get through the next day and he really didn’t want to deal with those on top of everything else. He concentrated on the books again but was interrupted when Malfoy called his name.
“What is it now, Malfoy? I’m trying to study here. Transfiguration isn’t that easy, you know?” he snapped.
“I… sorry, it’s just… I wondered why you’re here in the middle of the night alone instead of studying with your friends in bright daylight.” Malfoy asked, sounding way less self-assured than he normally did.
“It’s none of your business, Malfoy. But if you have to know, I intend to become an Animagus and that requires quite a bit of extra studying.”
And I’m hiding from my nightmares by staying up as long as possible, Harry added in silence. But Malfoy didn’t have to know that, it was bad enough that Harry had told him as much as he did.
Draco was stunned. He hadn’t expected to get an answer and now he was at loss for words. Without trying to continue the conversation he got back to his Charms essay that was due the next day. Well he wanted to go back to it, but Potter cleared his throat and his head snapped back up.
“Well, why are you here, Malfoy?” he asked with a steady voice, making Draco wince at the nervous stuttering he had done.
“Charms essay. Are you already done with that? And I’m running away from my nightmares.” He mumbled that last part, hoping Harry didn’t hear him which was very unlikely in the silence of the library.
“What was the last sentence? I didn’t quite catch it.”
Draco sighed. “I said I am running away from my nightmares! Are you satisfied now, Potter?”
“I do, too,” Harry admitted.
“What?”
“Run away from nightmares.”
That was when Harry realized something was different. He didn’t feel cold anymore, still a little cool but not as if his limbs would fall off frozen any moment. Was this Draco’s doing? He had still felt cold when he entered the library right after curfew and nothing remarkable had happened between then and the arrival of Draco. And since when did he think of Malfoy as Draco anyway?
When you realized that he has nightmares, too, his mind supplied. You sympathize with him because he has had a similar life to yours, just on the other side of the war.
He banged his head on the table. Sympathy for Draco Malfoy of all people? What was he doing? This was Malfoy, the guy who let Death Eaters into a school full of children and almost killed Dumbledore.
He was doing it to protect his family from Voldemort. And he saved your life back in Malfoy Manor.
Harry groaned. This voice in his head, which sounded suspiciously like Hermione, was right. Draco did deserve the sympathy, probably more than anyone.
Then, Harry had an idea.
“Malfoy?”
The other boy looked up again, obviously not happy about the interruption.
“What?” he spat.
“I wondered… do you still want to sit with me?”
Draco just showed a small but honest smile and levitated his books over to Harry’s table.
Harry felt his body go back to a normal temperature. It definitely had to do with Draco.
“You’re the first one who is offering to share a table with me this year,” Draco admitted, a little embarrassed at how open he was now that they had an actual conversation.
“I’ve noticed that. But I have to say, I can understand the others. You’ve been on the other side of the war; it’s only natural that they want to keep their distance from you. And even though you’ve not been sent to Azkaban, you still did all these things.” Harry didn’t elaborate but they both knew exactly what he meant. “They hate you and maybe fear you and it’s perfectly understandable.”
Draco hesitated but then asked the question he wanted to be answered so desperately.
“Do you hate me?”
“No.”
“No?”
“Not anymore. In fact I still hated you just minutes ago. But I thought about it. You only did all these things to save your family. And I think I can understand that motivation better than anyone. And in the end you couldn’t kill. You deserve a second chance. Did you ever think about how similar our lives have been up to this point? You had all those expectations of your father to fulfil; I did everything Dumbledore told me I had to do to save the world. And now we’re at a point where we just want to live our own lives, without expectations but we can’t because people still expect us to play our roles as perfectly as ever.”
“I hate to tell you this, but you’re right Potter.”
Harry smiled and subconsciously leaned into the warmth Draco provided and continued his studies. Draco wanted to do the same but he couldn’t concentrate enough. His mate was sitting right next to him, for fuck’s sake. He couldn’t just keep his calm and act as though he was just like any other person.
He had never been able to act normal around Harry – and yes, he was Harry to Draco now, at least in his mind. The boy had something about him that irked Draco and made him want to be close to him. And as he had rejected his offer of friendship on the train when they started at Hogwarts Draco had done it the other way around and always started a fight when he had the opportunity.
Harry noticed Draco’s distress and turned around to face him again.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing… I just can’t concentrate.” He forced a small smile on his face to reassure Harry that he really was okay. In reality he would only be okay if he snogged him senseless right there and then. It didn’t matter that the life mate of a Dragon Child was more often than not only a companion, a friend, he wanted more than that.
Then just try to be friends with him and then you can go from there.
Draco sighed. The voice in his head sounded suspiciously like Pansy. But it was right nonetheless. It was easier to get into a relationship with Harry when they were already friends. He sighed again and got back to his work.
Hours later, Harry got up and was about to leave the library when Draco called him back.
“Potter?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you here tomorrow night?”
“Yes. I’m here every night. And call me Harry.”
“Mind if I join you again, Harry?”
“Not at all, Draco.”
Harry smiled and Draco was completely taken aback. It was the smile Harry only gave his friends, it was honest and Draco had to admit he liked it, a lot.
When he looked up again, Harry had disappeared and he felt the heat coming back. He yawned and grabbed his things to go back to the dungeons and catch a few hours of sleep. He had thankfully finished his Charms essay so he didn’t need to skip breakfast again and could sleep a little longer.
Harry felt the cold coming back as soon as he left the library but it wasn’t as bad as before.
It definitely has to do with Draco, he thought again.