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Heaven or hell, I can't tell

Summary:

Qui-Gon heard the stories elder Jedi told of what it was like to pass into the Force, or at least what they thought would happen. To fade into the Cosmic Force and join the legions of Jedi that had gone before him. A peaceful end any Jedi hoped to be worthy of.
So why is Bastilla Shan here and why is she in her underwear?

Rated T for some inappropriate jokes and general nonsense. I know nothing about the Old Republic peeps aside from fanfiction and nothing about the Sith aside from their names and their Galaxy of Heroes appearance. Do I care? No.

Notes:

This is a sheer crackfic I've been thinking about for a while. Don't take it too seriously and if you have ideas let me know!

Chapter 1: THIS ONE'S A JEDI

Chapter Text

The last thing Qui-Gon saw before he closed his eyes was his padawan’s terror and grief stricken face. The first thing he saw upon opening them again was a face he half-recognized from his history books, and not one he was hoping to see.

“Heeeey Jedi, we got one of yours!”

He blinked and went to pinch himself, but his hand went through his opposite arm, so he was very much dead.

The woman giggled. “Don’t bother. You’re here with us whether ya like it or not!”

“Where is…here? And who are you?”

“So this is what happens when a trained Force-user dies of something other than old age. You end up in this weird middle ground. From here you can either pass on into the Cosmic Force, head into the Living Force if you can figure that out, or stay here in the Unifying Force.” The longer he stared at her, the more something niggled at him. “I’m Bastilla Shan. What’s your name?”

His jaw dropped, and then kept dropping. Qui-Gon looked down and yelped. His jaw shot back up into place. “What…”

“Yeah our bodies are completely malleable. Or at least the collection of this blue stuff that counts as our bodies.”

“You’re a Sith.”

“Technically I’m both.”

“What are you doing here and why…are you-”

She cackled, popping a hip out to accentuate the lacy black lingerie she was wearing. “Settle in old man, you’re gonna be here for a while.”