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It’s Mav’s birthday. So, obviously they’re at Mav’s place.
Technically, it’s Ice’s house, but he and Mav are basically married so it doesn’t really matter. The point is that almost everyone is there to celebrate; even Penny and Hondo showed.
Everyone does in fact include Jake Seresin.
Bradley still doesn’t know what to make of the last time they saw each other. Of course they had hung out a couple nights since then but it was nothing like that evening. He wipes his hands over the tops of his jeans one last time before knocking. It’s not like he can avoid Jake forever, he’ll just have to get over himself.
He knocks, to which the door is wrenched open. It’s Phoenix.
“Bradshaw, you can never be on time huh?” She grins, stepping aside to let him in.
“Always fashionably late.” He replies grinning, making her snort.
He walks through the hallway, to the right and into the kitchen. Penny and Ice are side by side in front of the counter, Ice chopping vegetables and Penny tossing a bowl of salad. Next to sink Mav looks like he’s stuck on dish duty, which is probably the safest option since he can barely boil water.
Mav spots him first, abandoning his post and throwing the towel over his shoulder.
Bradley sets his stuff down on the island table in case of the inevitable hugs he’s going to get.
“Bradley!” Mav shouts, waddling over to him and pulling him into said inevitable crushing hug.
They both laugh, Bradley hugs him back just as hard. “Hi Mav, happy birthday.”
When Mav finally loosens his grip, Bradley takes a step back. Before he can protest Penny grabs him into a hug as well.
Ice claps him on the shoulder after he straightens. “Glad you could make it.” He’s in a pink ‘Kiss the Admiral’ apron, most likely a gift from Mav.
“Wouldn’t miss it.” Bradley smiles.
Penny nods her head down the hallway, already walking back to the counter. “Everyone’s out in the yard.”
He nods, grabbing the case of beer he bought on the way and Mav’s present, bringing them out to the back patio.
“Rooster!” someone shouts as he steps through the doorway.
Bradley smiles, feeling his shoulders lose their tense already. He raises the beer case, chuckling when a course of cheers rings out.
“I know, I know. What would you guys do without me?”
He makes his way to the wicker couch that’s covered in light blue cushions. Placing the beer on the glass coffee table, he gives Fanboy a pat on the shoulder, who’s sitting in a love seat angled to the left of the couch.
Payback and Phoenix are on the couch watching Bob absolutely destroy Fanboy in ‘Go fish’.
He makes his rounds, makes sure to check up on the Dagger squad and greets the mostly familiar guests. Hondo, Warlock and even Cyclone are there, looking in more casual clothing than Bradley's even seen.
“Bradshaw.”
Bradley knows who it is before he turns.
Jake is posted up against the wall next to the grill, watching Coyote gracefully make hot dogs.
He pushes off the wall, taking slow steps towards Bradley.
He's in black jeans, a beige short sleeve flannel over top of a white shirt. And a cowboy hat.
He's in a cowboy hat.
Bradley stops where he is, he can feel the fire creeping up to his cheeks.
Jake notices, if the smirk on his lips is anything to go by.
He makes a show of tipping it. “As I live and breathe.”
Bradley smiles, shaking his head fondly. “Hangy.” He greets, pretending to tip his own imaginary hat.
Jake giggles. Bradley thinks if he can get Jake to laugh like that for the rest of his life, he would do it in a heartbeat. Jake takes a couple more steps towards him.
“You look good.”
Jake is standing in front of him now, staring up at Bradley through his blond lashes with a smug grin.
“I am good, Roo. I’m very good.”
Bradley smiles, their usual banter calming him down.
Someone clears their throat behind Jake. “Alright lovebirds, settled down.”
Jake rolls his eyes, Bradley can feel his face grow red but he does a mock bow, pulling a laugh out of Jake. He leaves, walking back to the couch to oversee the card game.
The night goes on, Bradley keeps his distance for the time being. He still can’t seem to figure Jake out, his motives, whether he’s being serious or it's just his usual banter taken up a notch.
Everything was going fine, until it wasn’t.
They’d been watching Mav open present after present. Bradley's been having a good time, laughing and joking, enjoying the presence of the people he loves. Though, he could feel a tiny ball of dread start to form in his chest, tucked between his lungs.
Bradley had done his best to stomp it down, to at least hold out until it was time to leave. He could feel the wave of tears ripple behind his eyes, he knew he was close to losing it. Just wait till presents are over, then you can go.
Bradley gives himself a shake, quietly slipping away from the group to go back in the house. He ends up in the hallway next to the kitchen, resting his back against it.
He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. When he opens them, he’s met with a framed picture of his father. Bradley can tell, even from here that it's been freshly cleaned; it almost looks brand new.
A tear spills out, running down his cheek like a scorching fire. The sounds around him drown out, waving in and out like he’s underwater. He can’t focus, the lights are too bright, he can feel his breathing get heavy.
His dad.
His dad wasn’t here to watch him grow up. He wasn’t here to help him get into flight school. He wasn’t here to hold him while he cried in the hospital when his mom died. He wasn’t here for one of the most deadliest missions of Bradley’s whole career. He's not here to celebrate with Mav. He’s not here to help him through this weird thing with Jake. He's not here.
He’s not here.
Bradley can feel himself curling in on himself, his shoulder scrunching inward. It feels like there’s cement in his chest, his limbs feel like lead.
A hand rubs his back, coaxing him to straighten, to lean into the body next to him. He does, he lets his arms wrap around the torso in front of him, to hold on for dear life as a sob racks his body. Bradley’s hit with the scent of cologne, earthy with a hint of vanilla.
Jake.
That almost makes him sob harder.
Jake might not ease the pit in his stomach, might not slow his tears. Jake might not even soothe the ache in his chest but all Bradley can do is hope. All he can ever do is hope.
So he lets Jake lead him, he can vaguely see the hallway through his blurry vision. He lets himself trust. Trust that Jake is taking him somewhere safe. Trust that Jake will take care of him. He trusts and trusts until all he can focus on is Jake. His scent, the feel of his button-up shirt underneath Bradley's scrunched up fingers, the feel of Jake’s heartbeat racing against his palm.
Bradley feels himself being sat down, the cool of the porcelain seeping through his jeans. Jake leaves his side, for a moment, making Bradley shiver. He curls in on himself a bit, Jake being the one thing to hold him up.
He squeezes his eyes shut, tries to focus on his ragged breathing but nothing works.
There’s a hand on his knee, thumb rubbing soothing circles. Bradley looks up.
Bradley can’t help but think of how beautiful Jake looks.
Divine, heavenly, stunning, incredible.
The bathroom lights shine behind Jake over the mirror. Bradley’s seated on the toilet, Jake crouching in front of him to catch his eye. Green watches him with such soft concern it makes his heart melt. Jake’s hand rests heavily on his knee, the other hovers around his arm.
“Bradley.”
Jake whispers it, so so gently Bradley breaks down for the second time that night.
The tears well up before he can push them back down again. Jake’s face screws up with barely hidden worry. He makes a wounded sound in the back of throat, lifting his hand off of Bradley’s knee to grip the back of his neck. He pulls Bradley to him, wrapping his other arm around his back.
“Oh, honey.” Jake rests his head against Bradley’s, letting him take his time.
Bradley lets himself fall into Jake, his arms enclosing Jake's waist, his hands gripping the back of Jake’s shirt. He hears himself hiccuping, his broken sobs filling the small room. Jake runs his finger through Bradley’s curls, Jake’s nails scraping against the base of his neck.
Slightly, ever so slightly, Bradley feels himself calm down. His shoulders untense, his breaths start to match Jake’s, his brow unfurrows from where it’s pressed against Jake’s shoulder.
When he gets control over his voice again, he pulls away. Barely, so there's only inches between them. Bradley doesn’t think he could handle being too far from Jake at the moment. He feels like he has a rip in his very being and Jake is the stitching that’s holding him together.
Jake watches him. He waits, and waits as Bradley tries more times than necessary to gather his thoughts.
“I’m sorry.” He gets out, followed by another broken off sob.
Jake smiles, delicate and private. He cups Bradley’s cheek, wiping the remaining tears away. He presses his lips to Bradley’s hairline. They linger for a second before disappearing, Bradley leans into Jake as he pulls away. He chuckles quietly, letting Bradley rest his forehead against Jake’s.
Bradley sniffles, closes his eyes and lets himself be coddled, lets himself be taken care of.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Jake asks quietly.
Bradley opens his eyes, licks his lips and sucks in a deep breath.
“I- I just started thinking,” He pauses, he doesn’t even really know how to put it into words. He’s half expecting Jake to make a joke but he doesn’t, there's not a hint of humor in his face. “about my dad.”
“An- and I, you know, he’s not here, and it just-, I can’t-” Bradley feels another cry being ripped out of him, his throat closing impossibly.
Jake runs his fingers through Bradley’s hair again, pressing another kiss to his forehead.
Gently, he drags Bradley down onto the floor with him, sitting him in between Jake's legs. Bradley curls into Jake, tucking his face into Jake’s neck. Jake starts to rock back and forth ever so slowly, hums softly under his breath as he rubs Bradley’s back.
Bradley cries, and cries and cries until it hurts, until his throat feels raw.
When he’s calm once more, Jake speaks up.
“Thank you.”
Bradley searches his mind for things he's done for Jake recently other than cry onto his shoulder. He clears his throat a couple times.
“For what?” He asks.
“For letting me help you.”
Bradley squeezes Jake middle tighter, his hands bunching up Jake’s flannel.
“Thank you for wanting to.”