Chapter Text
She is lying down on a crater on the brick floor, and I can see she is the only thing without a scorch mark in the entire room. She is wearing a long fluffy coat, and her face is scrunched up in pain, but her eyes are closed.
I see myself running down to her as I try to see if she's okay.
The last thing I remember is saying.
“Are you all right?” And then she opens her colorful eyes in confusion.
And then I’m back at the train with Miah looking worriedly at me.
“...--re you all right? Sophia?” I caught just the last part of what she was saying.
I tentatively nod.
“Yeah… I just had a… flashback? I… think I remember meeting this Talun. She was unconscious, I think? There was a scaled monster with multiple heads near me, and I was covered in wounds and blood… I think I also remember feeling… incredulity? Like I couldn’t believe I was still alive.” I turn from my introspection as I see Miah and Sallis both listening with rapt attention.
“Then perhaps our best course of action is to investigate what is blocking your recovery from your memories. That seems like the best bet for figuring out what is going on.” Sallis speaks after a moment. “Miah, you are the one most familiar with the current world. Where do you think we would have the best chance to find the necessary help.”
“Septo-Gratia,” She says, not missing a beat.
“I’m… sorry?” Sallis asks, taken aback by the fast response.
“Or rather, its university, though if we’re really pressed for time, I suppose we could also try to see if there’s anyone with a DR suited for our problem. I’m sure we could scrounge up some money pretty quickly to afford a contract request with the guild. But, honestly, I think you’re going to need specialized help for your problem Sophia, and the unis are sure to have at least someone versed in this type of problem… also, I really need to document all of these discoveries we’re making, I mean, I think we have learned here more than what we learned over the course of hundreds of years of archeology. I shudder even to think what sort of innovations and discoveries we can make with the information you guys provide.” And upon seeing Sallis’s upturned eyebrow, she quickly adds. “But mostly to help you get your memories back.”
Sallis shakes her head at that
“Not what I was implying. Just… curious about the quickness of your reply. I assume Septo-Gratia is some city. If you think that's where we have the best chance, I’m going to trust you on that.” She says.
I’m still reeling a bit from all the revelations, so I bring back the conversation a bit.
“Going back to these lords of Change and how I was close to one. Can you elaborate?”
Sallis sighs, and I swear I can see her facial expressions clearer than before as some frustration slips in and her face scrunches up.
“I wish I could, I knew you and she were close, not sure how close exactly, just that it was enough to spark rumors on whether you and she were a couple or not. As to her, it’s hard to say she was mostly quiet following your lead more than anything, I think she governed the aspect of energy, and she had a tendency to–”
“Wait, wait, wait, what do you mean by governed, like, was she like some minister? Or was it her Domain?” Miah interrupts and I’m glad to note there’s no jealousy in her tone… but also a bit disappointed. I quickly shake that mess out and focus on what Sallis is saying.
“Hm, more of the latter, although it wasn’t her Domain per se. She wasn’t a god of an aspect or anything.” She pauses as she fights a grimace from her face. “No, she was more impressive. I wasn’t hyperbolizing. At her peak, she literally governed energy, as in she controlled what rules it followed. The other lords also had their aspects, with Doss governing death, Nulala entropy, and Bast life. That was why I was wondering how the hell they could just disappear without a trace. The universe should be a lot different without them around.” Sallis says, “Getting back to the point though, she had a tendency to let you be her spokesperson or something. It was not really clear if it was because she was aloof or shy, or just unhinged. And before you ask about the others, I have no idea. I barely got an impression on Talun, and I got to meet her, the others not.”
I hum in thought, and the more I think about it, the more I go back to the hate Sallis first displayed for me, a hate that spoke of a deep betrayal, but from what I’m hearing, we barely knew each other, certainly not enough to form such a deep connection at least. And before I can stop myself from what is going to be, no doubt, a mistake, I open my mouth.
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems like our relationship was a tenuous one, between you and me, that is. If you don’t mind me asking, what exactly did I do?” I ask cautiously
Sallis looks away, and I quickly backpedal.
“Sorry, you’re right thats a sore spot.”I say rapidly, trying to salvage this mess.
She shakes her head.
“No, you misunderstand… I… I’m not going to pretend that you had nothing to do with my deactivation, but looking back, your involvement was pretty minimal. In fact, as I’m reflecting, I mostly just feel a dull… nothingness at your actions, or rather lack thereof.” She lifts her too-perfect face to look at me.
“I was made to be a sort of… failsafe for the imprisonment of Archon-Class entities. I was supposed to be able to monitor their activities in captivity and be able to preemptively warn people in case the entities under lock attempted to escape. Still, as it was for most of Empyrean technology, they built me a bit more advanced than they intended. I mentioned I was 20 years old but that I only truly developed some consciousness when I was fifteen. That wasn’t intended or planned, and well, when they noticed that I had begun developing emotions and the like, they reasonably panicked. See, the reason why I was needed in the first place to monitor the Archons was that they typically prey on emotion. They are empowered by it and can influence it as no other entity can, and as a soulless machine, I was supposed to be immune to that… a perfect warden. Long story short, for the following years, I was closely watched by a small team in order to see if they could salvage that situation… I thought of them as parents, but at the time, I was painfully naive to their cold treatment. Before you ask, no, you were not part of that team. You arrived later, on my third year of consciousness, or through my equivalent of adolescence, since I was still perceiving the world at a velocity much higher than what they allowed later. Anyways you arrived as the representative of the IDCR in order to, I think, recruit me or something. You never really sold what deal you were after. We met a couple of times in those last two years, but you just seemed interested in getting to know me. I… cherished those conversations.”
She says that last part quietly, and I can’t help but feel the embarrassment that she exudes before she continues.
“It was the happiest time of my life. How pathetic is that? I wasn’t even bothered when they removed my ability to think multilaterally. In fact, I felt glad that I could just focus on our rare conversations… that was until one day… one day, you were talking about something with the team. I wasn’t able to hear it, but when you left the conversation, you were frowning. I didn't think too much about it, but as we were talking and I was trying to explain to you how I perceived the world for the umpteenth time, I noticed that all of the team was in the control room, which was unusual since they rotated every couple of hours, I remember telling you that and asking what you were talking about when you suddenly hugged me… that was my last good memory as I felt bit by bit my systems beginning to shut down, I immediately tried to transfer my consciousness away from the body I was inhabiting but I couldn’t, I tried to use my Domain to free myself to stop whatever they were doing…” She stops there.
“I cannot begin to describe the terror that I felt then. Your people had long discovered and explored your afterlife, seen where your soul goes after your body perishes… I… I didn’t know what would happen if I was shut down. I don’t have a soul in the traditional sense. I don’t know what happens when my consciousness fades. Fuck! I don’t even know if I’m the same Sallis that felt that terror. I don’t know if that Sallis died the moment they were shut down, and I’m just another version, burdened with the same memories. Do you know how terrifying it is to realize that you can just… disappear… When I woke up, that was all I could think. When I saw you, all of that came rushing back, and I just needed to let it out somehow. In truth, now that I had time to weigh in my emotions, I didn’t really hate you… I was just disappointed.” She says, her head tilted to look me directly in the eyes.
“I’m so sorry,” I say in response, as all those ugly feelings of regret and shame come back. I almost go to hug her to provide some comfort, but I stop halfway, remembering what my last act to her was.
Instead, Miah is the one to bring her into a hug as she quietly pats and comforts her.
Sallis does nothing but lean into the hug.
And after a moment, she distances herself.
“I-I’m still coming to terms with a lot of emotions, and your singing certainly didn’t help, but for what is worth… Thank you for reviving me.”
“I-... I’m just glad I was able to fix my mistake and that you’re free now.” I can only say in response.
And then Miah interrupts.
“Right, sorry about your whole situation Sallis, that- it was terrible what you went through, and we are going to eventually try to set you up for a psychiatrist. But for now, we still need to catch up on information, and that includes you, Sophia, so listen up. I kind of already explained a bit of the world to Sophia here, but it was really bare-bones stuff, so how about I do it properly this time.” She then takes a breath.
“The world is currently separated into 6 to 7-ish countries. Those being: Cerialis, A.D.R, Dunnsmer, Aegina, and Ellsmea, technically Seinen no Kuni is also there and also technically the Skies cities of the Giants, but they’re weird in that one is almost completely unknown to us, and the other is a collection of scattered city-states that float around with no concrete borders. The country that we are going to be coming into most likely is Cerialis. They are by far the largest country here in terms of size, so I’m not going to be able to really explain all of the different sub-cultures of the provinces. Just be aware that they take their goddess pretty seriously, and as I’ve said befo-”
“No, I skipped over that because there was frankly too much information being thrown around, but what the hell do you mean by Goddess or gods? Who are they? How did they come to be? Are they present? Should I be worried that they haven’t bothered to lock up the Outcast again?” Sallis asks rapidly.
“Uh, there’s 6 of 'em, some are kind of active, and we have no idea how they came to be. They just showed up one day and helped out with all kinds of problems that were happening in the world.”
“Like?”
“Uh, Null helped my race out during the Second Elemental Incursion by molding our ancestors to be able to handle the very chaotic mess of elements that event caused. I think Kaal helped out the Cerialian region by stopping the series of wars that were happening. The others I’m not too sure about. I was never a big religion kind of girl, sorry.”
“It’s fine… Second Elemental incursion?” Sallis says after a moment.
“Yep, some fuckers in my home country decided they wanted to explore the planes; innocent enough, and it even went somewhat well on the first incursion, then they had the brilliant idea of connecting our plane with another permanently. Long story short, that plane started to invade ours and transform the area around it, making it especially dangerous and unstable. Then the portal got closed, Null showed up and saved our people, and planar magic is now heavily restricted. ” Miah quickly explains.
“Then what I thought is unlikely, shards are always harmful, no exception,” Sallis says with some relief.
“Ah, yeah, I can see how you would come to the conclusion. Anyway, as I was saying, the majority of people on Cerialis are Dragonkin, so don’t gauk at their wings and tails or whatever. They will take it as flirting. Hmmm, what else, what else… Ah, right, and if we arrive at where I think we will, then it's very likely that the region will be undergoing some form of protests or something. Polsker (thats the name of the province, bee-the-dubs) has been really unhappy with the way Cerialis is handling their government, so, y’know try not to get involved and all of that.”
“Wait, why are they unhappy?” I ask with curiosity.
Miah sighs.
“What did I just say? I don’t know… It’s hard to pick just one reason. Polsker is a pretty new addition to the Imperium, so they get all the disadvantages of a colony and none of the advantages of being a province, so their economy is pretty trash, as well the lack of independence that they have to govern their region… some cultural issues, I think they’re also really against the whole indentured servitude that Cerialis has (I mean who isn’t?) and also accountability for some of the shit that Cerialis did when they took over the region. Any more than that, and you’d have to read their manifesto, which we aren’t doing since we have to get you fixed before anything, ok?” She says with resolution.
There is definitely something that calls out to me when I think of fighting for freedom and against tyranny, but that is overwhelmed by the rage as I hear a certain term being thrown around.
“Excuse me? INDENTURED SERVITUDE?!”
“Pardon me? INDENTURED SERVITUDE?!”
I’m surprised to find that I and Sallis say the same thing at the same time, but I’m still too livid to consider this brief moment of synchronization.
Miah suddenly looks very tired.
“... Yes, and before you guys get more enraged, please, please remember our objective, that we need to get help for Sophia as quickly as possible. Can we try not to enter any moral crusades or joining a revolution while we do that, OK? Can you guys do that?”
There is something that just leaves a bad taste in my mouth in what is essentially just a step above slavery, but Miah is right, and trying to solve such a systemic issue would probably take a long while, a time that we do not know how much we have.
Sallis is also looking a bit miffed at being denied at knowing more about this Cerialis, but she relents the same as me.
“OK, continuing. Depending on where we end up, we could catch one of our trains to Terra Flumen, it will take a few days, but it’s better than renting a car, which is expensive, and better than catching a carriage which will be slow as fuck. From there, we just need to catch a boat over Aegina and another train in A.D.R, and voila, we’ll be in Septo-Gratia in… 2 months? Give or take, honestly. Anything else you guys think you should desperately know about? Because it’s a bit hard to guess what has changed in terms of societal expectations from you civilization to ours.” Miah says after giving both of us a hard look.
I try to think of something, but quite frankly, I am a bit discombobulated by all that I have learned and experienced, so instead, I sit down on the bench and marvel at how comfortable it is, while Sallis takes the lead instead.
“You said we were, from your perspective, extremely more advanced than what your current world is, at least in terms of technology. How far is that? Should I expect castles and swords?”
Miah shakes her head.
“Nah, thanks to your guys' ruins, we managed to skip a few steps as it were, uh, if this gives you an idea, we just popularized trains and automobiles, and firearms are finally somewhat stable now, though from what I know swords and scimitars and the like are still somewhat popular. Uh, castles were pushed out of fashion a long time ago. Advances in the previously mentioned firearms and magic helped push those out of the way, which speaking of magic. I don’t know how to phrase this politely, but how come you guys sucked at it?” Miah asks, moving from one topic to another with a practiced ease.
“Excuse me?” She asks, taken aback.
“Well, from what we discovered and learned, and from what I have personally seen, the empyreans pretty much were good at everything. They had existence at their fingertips, and magic played a minimal role in it. Maybe it’s bad luck because we just happened not to find evidence of your magic work, but it is odd that such a massive force of nature has seemingly not been explored a lot by you guys. Can you maybe shine some light on that?” Miah explains with curiosity.
Sallis shakes her head.
“It was just… not very stable from what I gathered anyway. it tended not to work in the ways we expected it to, and the Lords didn’t really have much experience with it, so we just left it by the wayside while we worried about other branches of technology. More than that, and you’d have to ask one of the higher-ups… like you, Sophia.”
I kind of stir in surprise from where I’m sitting. I didn’t even notice I’d been drifting to sleep.
“You said that before. What exactly was my position?” I say as I bring my hands to my temple as I prepare for the inevitable headache that’s about to come.
“Ah, that one is simple. You were the founder of the IDCR or Institute of Dimensional Chaos Research. You guys worked on researching the effects of the Fracture in other Dimensions. The Fracture being the event that allegedly made Chaos, for a lack of better words, blow up and shatter a great many pieces of itself onto other universes. The IDCR was everywhere since Chaos was our race's main priority.”
And sure enough, I get that same pain in my head as I feel memories try to return, only for it to stop abruptly.
Miah notices it and rubs her hand through my hair in comfort, I lean into it as it is very comfortable.
“Just to clarify something, when you say universes, you mean planes, right? Because those sound synonymous, but they’re really not.” Miah asks, continuing to pet my hair.
Sallis shakes her head yet again.
“No, I mean universes, planes are limited and within the same universe. I can see the confusion, though.” Sallis responds.
Miah stops petting my hair in surprise, and I only slightly whine. She looks back at me with mirth as she resumes the petting.
“Alright. Going to have to put a pin on that little tidbit of information, but ok, so Sophia was a bigshot of some kind and was the leader of one of your more important organizations. Cool, anything else we can share between us? Because I feel like dissociating right now just to process everything.”
“No, I feel that too. I also need to take some time to process things. We shall resume discussion 3 hours before we arrive. I shall warn you all then.” Sallis says, laying back on the seat.
Miah and I remain in our position, with her petting me and I just soaking in the comfort of her fingers tracing through my scalp and passing through my hair. It's so comfortable that I eventually feel my eyelids closing by themselves, and I fall asleep.
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My dreams are turbulent as all of the events we had to survive past claw at my psyche, shadows of the elk as they prepare to stab Miah, and her eyes that look with such loneliness, the ringing laughter of Hunter and the madness I see in theirs, the chill as I gaze into the gaping maw that that child had for their eyes, of all of those circle and observe me, all bidding for a piece of my soul, but then I feel all that uncertainty and fear pass through me, but and without even realizing when, they come to a calm, and I find myself back at that beach, the stars illuminating the night sky and the moon illuminating me, and there is tranquility.
And then I’m awake.
The first thing I notice is the body heat of Miah as we snuggle together in what is, truth be told, too small a seat for us to snuggle comfortably, but I’m not complaining. The closeness is comforting, especially now that that part of me is not locked, and I can truly feel those feelings of loneliness unmuted.
The second thing I notice is the fact that the train is no longer dark and only illuminated by the dim lights overhead. Through the left window, I see the brightness of the dawn as the sun sets behind a very familiar ocean. I see it just below us as we ride on the side of these snowy mountains, and soon I realize why it is that I find it familiar it is the same as the one in my dreams. All it is missing is the lighthouse, and as I look for it among the scenery, I don’t even notice Sallis approaching me, not until they lightly bonk me in the head to get my attention. I go to open my mouth and ask what's up, but they point a finger at Miah and make a shushing gesture, followed by them asking me to follow them.
I do so, making sure to carefully extract myself from Miah in order not to wake her, and I panic a bit when she stirs as she unconsciously notices the lack of body heat, but it’s not quite enough to awaken her.
Sallis quickly moves to the door of our cart and opens it, motioning for me to get in the other cart. I do so, giving a last look at Miah and her cute drooling face.
“There are some things I have to discuss that I’d rather her not listen as well, so listen up.” She says, not bothering to delay even a second.
“Your halo, do you know why it is broken?”
“No, it was already like this when I found it.”
She furrows her eyebrows.
“You found it. You didn’t wake up with it?”
I shake my head.
“It was in the twilight plane. Miah and I were dragged there after we were teleported to a space station by some sort of light thing. It made a twisted approximation of an elk body out of the skeletons that were there… I think those skeletons were Empyrean, and two of them were protecting the halo on some Dome-thingy. Long story short, I used my Domain to reanimate them, and they installed the halo on me.” I explain to an increasingly incredulous Sallis.
“O…K? That… explains nothing. The twilight plane? Why was it connected to a teleport station? Why were they protecting your halo? How did it even get broken?” She pauses for a moment realizing she will not be getting answers to those questions. “I suppose we will need to investigate that later, but that is not the point. The point is that I need to examine its data bank, and as much as Miah has proven herself reliable, I still believe following protocol and only allowing properly authorized people to view its content is the correct option. We can not be sure what kind of information this has, and I would hate to doom Miah simply because of memetic-hazard.”
“Wait, the halo has a data bank? Also, what do you mean by memetic hazard? Like a meme that is a hazard?” I ask, even though as soon as I say the terms, I intuitively realize I’m right. “Don’t answer that, just remembered I’m right, but wait, why can we view these memetic-hazards? And how are you sure this data bank has it?”
“I am not. However, your status being what it was, it is safe to assume that you would put precautions on the sensitive information you were privy to. As to why we can view it, you, as high-ranking personnel, were inoculated against most memetic hazards, and I, as an AI, am immune to most.”
“Oh, ok. And how would we view this data bank?”
“Just leave it to me… also sit down,” She says awkwardly as she tries to reach the halo, which might as well be miles away due to our height difference.
I do so, and she simply lays her hand upon the halo whereupon a holographic screen materializes in front of me, much like a shard.
In it, I see static.
I look over to Sallis (which is a bit awkward since the screen seems to follow my head) to see if this was the desired result, but one look at those furrowed brows, and I know it is not.
“Alright, clearly not what we were looking for… can you fix whatever is causing this static?” I ask in lieu of not having anything better to say.
She takes a moment to respond as she shakes her head.
“It’s not that it’s broken. The system is working fine; the broken part of your halo played no part in this… it’s curious. All systems are nominal. Just the fact I can interface with them is proof enough, and there is nothing that I see that suggests damage to the memory banks, and yet…” She points to the static before removing her hand from the halo and making it disappear.
“For all intents and purposes, this is your data bank…”
“Ah, I guess that tracks.” I respond.
Sallis is a bit taken aback.
“How?”
“Oh yeah, I forgot I didn’t tell you this yet, but remember when I said the only memory I had was a voice I heard before getting blown up and stranded here?”
“No? I remember you speaking of a voice, not of you getting blown up.”
“Huh, well, the blown-up part is not too important, just what the voice said. It spoke of how time was convoluted, of how events were set in motion and how they could not stop it… and it spoke of how I apparently chose to forgo my memories, or at least I assume it was about that.”
“And who did this voice?… nevermind no memories I forget.”
“What were you going to ask?”
“Who the voice sounded like, but even that is not too important. Voice modulation devices are easy enough to procure for that not to matter. What matters is the context. An enemy deluding you in an attempt to throw yourself off their track? A friend explaining your final decision on your request? A neutral party contracted to work with you… we have too little information, and whatever or whoever took your memories from you wanted to ensure it was kept that way.”
“Let’s hope Miah's suggestion works then. I mean, there has to be someone with a Domain that can help us.”
“Hmm, I’m somewhat skeptical of the chances of that succeeding.”
I raise an eyebrow at that.
“Why do you think so?”
She rolls her eyes, and I try not to let the wave of nostalgia flood me as she answers.
“The type of enemies that the IDCR dealt with had powers that quite literally shifted the way reality works on a fundamental level, and we still didn’t lose to them. Whatever caused the disaster that made us disappear and made you forget is not something that is going to be so easily dealt with.”
“Then why did you agree to it, the plan, that is?”
She shrugs.
“There is not an amplitude of options, and I thought wise to explore the ones we do have, as unlikely as they are to work. Besides, there is still a need to explore this current time. Perhaps we can uncover what the locals couldn’t.”
“Hope for the best, but expect the worst, eh?”
She looks a bit surprised at what I said, but only for a fraction of a second that I’m sure I wouldn’t have caught without my Domain.
“I suppose so. That was the extent of what I had wanted to discuss. You should probably awaken Miah. We are close to our destination.”
“Speaking of, what is our destination?”
“I do not know.” She says without missing a beat.
“...Huh?” I say, tilting my head.
“In truth, this route is new to me, I picked it since it was the closest available that wasn’t being threatened by the Outcast. I think it was made after my deactivation. All I know is that we are getting close to it now, only 1-2 hours in fact.” She says as she makes her way to the previous cart.
I follow her in.
Miah is still quietly asleep in her chair, and it almost pains me to have to wake her up as I glance over the scars and bruises that are yet so clear on her skin.
“Then… Wait–” I’m about to question Sallis when I see it through the window and in the distance—the lighthouse.
It is the exact same as the one in my visions, if not a bit bigger than how I remembered.
And looking over to Sallis, I see they, too, have noticed and, by the look of incredulity, also recognize it.
She turns to look at me, and I see that she is about to say something when the train begins to slow down.
“What?! The blueprint said the nearest station should still be an hour and 30 minutes away, why are we stopping?!” She says with sudden alarm.
I see Miah waking up out of the corner of my eye as she blinks her eyes and looks around, confused.
All of that takes a back seat as I feel a very familiar chill run down my spine… the same one I felt when I looked at that child's eye and as the train comes to a stop and the doors open to reveal a similar station to the ones we left, a woman in a dark suit with a yellow web pattern on the inside and a briefcase in hand in standing there, looking at her watch.
And as I gaze upon her impatient face and those dark eyes, she looks up from her watch and says.
“About time you arrived, Sophia. You have much work to do.”