Send up a signal flare

by LostTorterra

Summary:

Sometimes when a disease has been ignored for so long the body triggers a more obvious symptom that can't be ignored as easily in order to gain attention.

Robotnik has been in love for years. The mushroom planet is the perfect time to break him of his denial.

Chapter 1: Up in the Air

He hates surprises.

 

Always has. Surprises mean you haven't taken into account all the variables. They mean you didn't think of something. That you weren't smart enough to consider a facet of the equation. Low probability is not absolution, it's just further evidence of stupidity. 

 

So imagine how he feels as he's going through the rubble of his ship, his beautiful prototype that didn't deserve this horrible fate, and suddenly he's coughing. Coughing and choking, unable to breath. Then finally when it feels like he's going to pass out, he hacks up a saliva covered flower petal. 

 

And then another comes up. 

 

And another. 

 

And another. 

 

Petal after petal as he notes, in a distant sort of way, as saliva turns bloody then to just blood itself. As the petals get bigger and bigger until it's a bud then a full flower. As he coughs and hacks, and heaves until practically a full bouquet appears at his feet.

 

He catches his breath and feels the rage burning under his skin at the sight.

 

How fucking dare his body. How fucking dare his pathetic meat flesh of a prison betray him in this manner. Force him to cough up blooms of-of-of Felicia Amelloides of all things!

 

long-term loyalty and trust

 

No. No, it's even worse than his body betraying him. His body could be forgiven in this manner. It's imperfect. It's organic and so prone to flaws and faults. No…the fault lies within something far more upsetting.

 

It lies within his mind.

 

His mind. His sanctuary. His perfect infallible mind that has never made a mistake that truly mattered! It has betrayed him! It has found some pathetic emotion beyond the accepted rage and smugness and-and superiority and instead focused on something as useless as love. 

 

And unrequited love at that!

 

It must be recent. It has to be recent. Ever since that-that rodent of a hedgehog showed up everything's gone wrong. So that has to be when this affliction made its move. Sunk its roots in and poisoned him from the inside out. Yes it has to be recent.

 

So who is it? 

 

That annoying ho-dink of a neanderthal sheriff that sided with the hedgehog? His even more idiotic and perfect example of humanity's failure of a species deputy? The vet, whom in all honesty he had maybe five seconds of a conversation with but beyond that seemed somewhat tolerable? Or was it any of the other write offs involved with that mission that he happened to interact with?!

 

….no….hanahaki takes time to develop. Time for the victim to "know" and "fall in love" with the object of obsession. And even with his superior brain…even with his mind hanahaki wouldn't develop that quickly.

 

At least not to this extent. 

 

The blooms that he coughed up are nearly if not completely fully formed. That takes time. Months, years maybe, of emotions building and forming and tainting his perfect mind. So much time with him unaware of his mind's fallacy. No…it's someone else….but who? Who could possibly have been deemed worthy enough for this focus? Who could his…ugh..heart have chosen?

 

As he contemplates, he leaves the wreckage and unknowingly gravitates towards a strangely familair face-like rock.

Chapter 2: Visible Distress

Notes:

Didn't really plan to do this but this little bit came to me so I fugured I'd add his realization

Over the following months he keeps the rock close to him.

 

He places it by the wreckage when he searches for workable parts. He carries it when he moves around looking for anything other than fucking mushrooms. And he keeps it by his side as he sleeps. 

 

But only because it seems to be helping with his hanahaki not because of any sentimental malarkey.

 

Hanahaki is famous for being a nightmare to treat. Medications can relieve the pain and clear the lungs, but they cloud the mind. Surgery cuts the roots, but the trauma from the removal almost always induces permanent apathy. 

 

But this rock? This oddly shaped stone? Something about it lessens the pain in his chest and allows easy breathing. Is it the moss releasing some sort of spore while he sleeps counteracting the flowers in his lungs? Or maybe it's the minerals chipping off into his water and getting into his blood? Regardless, it's helpful so he keeps it close.

 

And since it's so helpful, it's only fitting to name it Agent Stone.

 

Stone was the first agent in a loooooonnnnng while that could actually keep up with him. So many agents passed through his lab unable to do the bare minimum without crying. Honestly he didn't even ask for much from the worthless little babysitters. 

 

The hours were long of course, science isn't 9 to 5 afterall, but seeing his genius in action is well worth any "overtime" they complain about. And how else is he supposed to test his badniks and other creations without those agents acting as targets and test subjects? No one ever died, that counts for something doesn't it? But noooooo apparently that's an "unsafe work environment" and "unacceptable".

 

Stone understood though. 

 

Stone knew how important the flow of work is, and not to interrupt it with petty things like work life balance or an average sleep schedule. Stone knew the value of varied tests and-and simulations and was always willing to play prey for his newest badnik. And Stone never complained about a stressful work environment! 

 

Stone was happier in the lab than at his home in fact! 

 

It was obvious from that soft smile Stone got from looking at his beautiful creations. Or how Stone would lose himself to barely hidden snickers whenever Walters called and he got to insult the other without consequence. And of course how could he forget that cute little blush that filled his face when he complimented that first Austrian goat milk latte. Then there was the-

 

...OH GIVE ME A BIG FAT FUCKING BREAK!!

 

His scream echoes through the stalks as he finally realizes whats been right in front of his face.

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 3 of Fuck it, Hanahaki be upon you