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Sam paused in his packing to rub at his forehead, to try and physically push the tiredness and the headache away knowing that it wouldn't do any good. College after the fallen had been hard, students asking questions, the Dean furious about the destruction around the library and the Professors not caring that he had other things on his plate as well as his classes.
He had ended up talking with each of them privately asking that he not be treated any differently then any other student after he found that he got sick with what ever was going around that week and had made them a deal. As soon as he was able he'd come by their offices to pick up his work and hand it in with in four days of receiving it, even if the other students had longer and they'd treat him like everyone else in their classes, no extra hard grading, no special passes other then him coming to collect his work when he was well.
He knew that at first none of them had liked it, most had sneered at the implications that he could get all the work that he had missed done in four days without cheating but had gone along with it just to see if he could do it.
Doing things that way had run Sam into the ground but he managed to get all his work done on time as promised and he was still passing his classes, which was a bit of a surprise to him. He had honestly thought that he would fail that semester instead he was passing with the average of seventy eight percent.
He zipped up his last bag and tossed the three bags over his shoulder, glancing around the dorm room to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything or left marks so he could get his security deposit back for the summer.
He was looking forward to summer break, if nothing else he could catch up on a lot of the sleep he'd been missing to keep up with his school work or because of his nightmares.
He shook his head as he headed out to the car park and smiled slightly when he spotted Bee waiting for him, he hadn't seen the yellow Camaro in over a week having been called away by Optimus. He tossed the bags into the back seat and slid in behind the wheel and gave it a gentle pat.
“Hey Buddy.” He greeted his best friend tiredly. “Good trip?”
“It was well worth it.” Bee informed him in a slightly British accented voice.
“Your voice!” Sam beamed. “Oh I'm so pleased Bee.” He gave the dash a pat and chuckled before twisting slightly to pull the seat belt over his torso and clicked it into place as Bee revved and then back out and drove at the speed limit out of the city.
“I am too, it will be much easier to speak this way, rather then get frustrated at the miscommunications.” Bee's engine was purring with pleasure.
“Yeah some of those were doozies.” Sam sighed remembering a few that had led to arguments and frustrations on both sides.
“Are we headed home or Diego Garcia?” Bee inquired as they hit the freeway.
“Parents are travelling again, so if we can get transport we can head to Diego.” Sam lent back in the seat but kept a hand casually on the wheel to give the illusion that he was driving. “They get everything set up okay?”
“A few miscommunications, but everything has been set up to keep us comfortable when not on duty.” Bee informed him with a small chuckle. “They had to build a few more hangers, one for each Autobot, each one sound proofed so we can have privacy unless we want to share, those with a human partner share.”
“You found a way for that to work so they don't trip over each other and accidently step on their humans things?” Sam asked curious as Bee drove them towards the airport.
“Our furniture is large, mostly Will hid his things under Ironhide's bed and tables once he was sure that Ironhide wouldn't accidently kick them with his peds.” Bee chuckled.
“We sharing?” Sam asked, he wasn't sure that Bee would want to, considering the nightmares he'd been having, he knew that his Guardian was worried about him and had promised to see Ratchet if things didn't start getting better after a few days into the vacation.
“We are.” Bee said happily.
“What about my nightmares Bee?” Sam asked softly, shifting his sunglasses on his face, using them to also hide the fact that his eyes were bloodshot from exhaustion. “I know that I've frightened you with my screams...terrified myself a few times...” He sighed and rubbed at his eyes.
“While that is true, you are my friend and I am not going to leave you to suffer alone.” Bee stated firmly. “If it effects my recharge badly I will find somewhere to recharge for a night or two, I can go longer without sleep then you.” he added as they easily passed through security check points and drove straight into the cargo hold of a waiting plane. “We are the only ones on the flight so you can nap, I'll wake you if the dreams start and when we land.” He offered.
“How long is the flight again?” Sam asked undoing his belt to shift into the back seat, pushing his bags on to the floor.
“Six hours.”
Sam heard the thumps of clamps attaching to Bee's wheels to keep him secured during the flight and settled comfortably into the back seat.
“Does Ratchet know how bad off I am?” Sam asked quietly, closing his eyes.
“He does.” Bee admitted. “He has promised to give you three days grace before he carries you off to the infirmary and sedating you so heavily that your nightmares won't bother you.”
“I might take him up on that.” Sam murmured. “I'm so tired Bee...” He closed his eyes tightly against the tears that he felt burning in his eyes.
“I know, Sam, I know.” Bee soothed and gently classical music started softly from his speakers. “I am here.”
“Thanks, Bee.” He breathed slowly sinking into sleep.
**
Sam jolted awake breathing hard, sobs emerging from his throat, tears sliding down his face and could hear the soft croon his identified as Bee trying to soothe him and help him to calm down.
He dug into one of his bags and pulled out a box of tissues and scrubbed at his face and huffed in annoyance.
“You managed nearly five hours Sam, that's more then you usually get.” Bee stated calmly as Sam sat up and stared at his hands.
“Lucky me.” Sam grumbled and then sighed. “Sorry.”
“I understand, Sam...now that you've explained it to me.” Bee gave a few clicks and a chirp.
Sam felt his cheeks heat a little as his mind translated what Bee had said, he'd never told any of the Autobots that over the last year or so he was slowly getting to understand what they were saying, he knew that he probably should as there was no way that it was normal but he found that his liked it and didn't want it to stop as most of the time they were calling him little brother and found the whirls, chirps and clicks soothing. He also knew that Bee had an inkling that Sam understood, more often then not he used Cybertronian vocals to express what he was feeling when he got frustrated with English.
He tilted his head as he sensed Bee hesitate for a moment. “You know now might be a good time to share some of those secrets you've been keeping with Ratchet, they might be a part of the problems you've been having.” Bee suggested a little tentatively.
“They might be.” Sam agreed softly as he sighed and ran his hands over his face, he wasn't surprised to find that they were shaking slightly. “Bee do you hate me for keeping secrets?” He asked quietly as he leaned back into the back seat.
“No Sam I don't. I know you are frightened at times, but everyone has secrets and no one has a right to demand that you tell them until you are ready to unless they are a danger to you or others.”
“That's the things, I don't know if they are.” Sam murmured staring up at Bee's roof.
“You have gotten good at listening to your instincts over the last few months, do they warn you that this is dangerous?” Bee inquired.
“No not dangerous....different, life changing and all that but not dangerous...” Sam chuckled a little bitterly. “Nothing different to everything else I've experienced over the last few years...”
“Would you really change anything?” Bee asked hesitantly.
“No, after all it lead me to you and the others.” Sam shook his head with a small pleased smile. “For the first time in years I have friends that won't judge me, that know me well enough to know when to push and when to back off and let me process things...” He shook his head. “No I wouldn't change it, things could have gone a little better in places, but being a young human I didn't deal too well with the shocks.”
“I think you did rather well considering your age.” Bee half protested half insisted.
“Yeah but you still lost the All Spark and Optimus died because I didn't listen.” Sam pointed out tiredly.
“You made a mistake, everyone does.” Bee pointed out. “Not even us Mech's are immune from making mistakes, Sam. You did your best to make it right, that's all someone can do.” Bee said softly. “You did more then anyone ever expected when you managed to reignite Optimus's spark, and you learned from your mistakes.” Bee sighed. “I just wish that everything you have been through didn't weigh so heavily in your mind.”
“Me too.” Sam said softly. “So any new Autobots for me to meet at the base?” He asked changing the subject.
“Five new Mech's have arrived since your last visit.” Bee brightened a little. “Prowl, he's Optimus's second in command and a brilliant tactician, he's a bit...” He paused trying to find the words. “By the book, he's always telling everyone off for bending or breaking rules and can seem to very cold Sparked but he's someone you can count on to always have your back...oh and he's a black and white police vehicle like Barricade...so try not to panic when you see him.”
“How do you tell them apart other than one will try to squish me on sight?” Sam asked only half joking.
“Prowl is bigger and his sig is Protect and Serve with Pride.” Bee informed him with a small chuckle. “Other then that there isn't much difference between the two, you'll learn to tell them apart as we did.”
“Alright and the other four?” Sam nodded slightly closing his eyes.
“Hound is a sniper I think the term is, he's about my height, not sure what Alt mode he's taken yet. Bluestreak is a scout like me, he talks all the time and it's hard to get him to stop unless in the middle of a battle and there isn't a single speck of blue on him.” Bee described them. “The other two are twins, not quite as annoying as Skids and Mudflap they are more refined, never, ever mark their paint work or touch it, they are very touchy about their appearance, very....arrogant and snobbish I guess...they are Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, Sides' is much more approachable out of the two.” Bee sighed. “They are ground pounders I think is the Earth term, they enjoy battles and some of our best fighters but tend to piss every one off with their pranks and attitude, they are Lamborghini's last I heard. Sides' is always red and Sunstreaker is yellow.”
“Noted.” Sam nodded without opening his eyes. “Were they shown what's happened here so far?”
“Yeah Optimus filled them in on everything and Ironhide filled in the gaps.” Bee gave the feeling he was shrugging.
“After seeing everything what is their attitude going to be to me?” Sam asked sounding resigned. Bee really couldn't blame him, a few of the others that had arrived had glared and completely disrespected Sam once he had shown up on base to meet them.
“I can't predict how they are going to react, Sam.” Bee sighed. “I haven't seen most of them in a long long time and they've been through a lot since then. I know that they were devastated at the loss of the All Spark, we all were...they were angry about Optimus but settled a little when they saw the lengths you went to make it right, they understood a little more when they were told how young you were...and spoke to a few NEST members to learn a bit more about humans and how they think and work...”
“So...wait and see...I can manage that.” Sam sat up as the plane dipped.
“We are landing.” Bee informed him a moment later.
“Right.” Sam manoeuvred himself back into the drivers seat but didn't bother to buckle back in and slid his sunglasses back into place. “Anyone meeting us at the landing strip?” He asked as the plane touched down and slowed.
“No, we weren't expected for another week or so, I did inform Optimus that we were coming early but everyone is out scouting bar Ratchet.”
“Good, it means I'll have a few hours to settle in and try to get some more sleep.” Sam nodded as the cargo bay door slowly opened and the clamps released Bee who immediately revved his engine and rolled out of the plane and headed towards the base which had tripled in size since the last time Sam had seen it. He counted over thirty hangers and then tried to count up the Autobots. “Extra Hangers for those who turn up later?”
“Yes, Optimus is hopeful that more will come over the next year.” Bee agreed as he cruised past a few before he turned into one that had yellow and black mark next to the door and parked a few feet in.
Sam stepped out when Bee opened the door and moved to the back seat to pull out his three bags and smiled as Bee transformed. He looked around, the front end was empty, giving plenty of room for Bee to drive in and transform, then there was a large metal couch that had an eight foot gap under it, Sam could see a human sized lounge room complete with an entertainment system and a dining table with six chairs about it under it and chuckled.
“My recharge station is at the back, you bedroom is under it.” Bee informed him heading that way and sat on the large flat metal bed and Sam walked between his peds to reach his room.
It had a nice size double bed, bedside tables with lamps on each side, a large wardrobe that he doubted that he could ever fill, three chested draws with eight draws each easily reaching his shoulders, two feet to the left was a green couch on a rug with coffee table and a further three feet down was a small office area and five feet down from that was a door.
“What's with the door?” Sam asked in a normal tone of voice knowing he wouldn't need to raise his voice for Bee to hear him and began unpacking his bags.
“Bathroom, used to be an office, each hanger has one so we just converted them to a private bathroom for our human partners or visiting humans.” Bee informed him. “Each Mech has a set up room for a human or two to stay with them for what ever reason, though only Ironhide and I have a human partner at the moment.”
“You think that is going to change?”
“Not for everyone, no.” Bee answered. “But a few have spoken up that they wouldn't mind if their temporary partner became permanent and moved in with them, but so far no orders or invitations have been given.”
“Some of those are only a few months old, give them a year or so to get used to the partnership and then make the moves to become more permanent.” Sam agreed with them waiting, even after a few years Bee and he got on each others nerves and fought like cat and dog.
“That's what Optimus advised.” Bee rumbled in agreement.
Sam placed his toiletries in the bathroom taking a quick look around and was surprised to find a nice sized bath as well as a shower, sink and toilet inside.
“Nice.” He murmured leaving the room to toss the empty bags in a wardrobe to forget about until the end of summer when he had to leave.
“Are you hungry?” Bee inquired.
“I'm not but I should try and eat something.” Sam answered as he walked out from under Bee's bed and looked up at his friend and made a miserable face when his stomach recoiled at the mention of food.
“You have to eat something Sam.” Bee gave him a concerned look. “You haven't eaten in two days or more.”
“Guess I'm going to keep that promise to see Ratchet then.” Sam sighed as Bee held his hand down and Sam climbed on and sat down holding on to a finger for stability as Bee stood and walked them out of their quarters and headed for another Hanger painted completely red with a large black symbol on the side. “What's the symbol?” Sam asked tilting his head.
“Healer/Medic” Bee answered as they entered and Sam saw the entire hanger was done up as Autobot hospital, under each large bed there were four human sized hospital beds and equipment. “Ratchet?” Bee called out not seeing the grumpy mech in the main ward.
“You haven't even been here an hour and already injured?” Ratchet groused as he came out of a doorway in the back.
“No, Sam hasn't been well as I told you last week, he still can't keep food down.” Bee shook his head as he set Sam down gently on a large mech bed so Ratchet could scan him.
“Are you hungry?” Ratchet asked as he approached them bed and Sam sat still as he felt the Mech's scanners run over him.
“No, the thought of it makes me nauseous.” Sam shook his head slightly with a tired sigh.
“You still aren't sleeping.” Ratchet growled.
“I got five hours on the flight over.” Sam shrugged.
“The dreams are still bad then?” Ratchet sighed shaking his head.
“Yeah.” Sam's shoulders drooped. “I still wake up screaming.”
“You are exhausted, underweight, malnourished, overstressed and starving.” Ratchet told him flatly. “You need food, sleep and rest.”
“I'm not getting it on my own Ratchet, it's why I'm here, I've tried...” Sam grimaced as his eyes welled with tears again and pressed his hands against his face to hide them.
“That leaves me to hook you up to get food and fluids into you and sedating you.” Ratchet warned.
“Please?” Sam begged softly, his voice cracked. “I don't want to dream any more.”
“I can and will do so, but first I want and need to know what you are seeing, it may not seem like it but talking about it helps in time.” Ratchet said firmly.
“Do your memory of things change when you sleep or recharge?” Sam asked in a small voice.
“No, but sometimes they get stuck in a loop.” Ratchet shook his head.
“Ours do, our minds playing out what if's, what could have been and our worst fears even if that isn't what happened.” Sam explained quietly dropping his hands into his lap and stared at them. “I keep seeing Scalpel dissecting me, or Bee, or Optimus, some times it's me not Scalpel cutting into them...” He shuddered. “Others are about Optimus defending me against Megatron in different locations, mostly ending with him being torn apart...then there's Egypt...” He shook his head as his throat closed up unable to say anything more.
“Sam none of that was your fault.” Ratchet said gently.
“Optimus dying was.” Sam reminded him bitterly.
“No, that was Megatron.”
“I might as well have.”
“You were frightened, mayhap even terrified, no one blames you for that, young one.” Ratchet soothed. “But you have to remember even in those dark dreams that you brought him back, against everything we have ever seen or known you managed to reignite him, that is something to be proud of.” Ratchet gently stroking his back with a finger. “Now lets get you into a bed.”
He gently picked Sam up as Bee let out a whirls, clicks and warbles that Sam translated to 'Listen to the Elder little brother, he is right' Sam was carried to a Mech bed with only two human hospital beds under it with a curtain for privacy and changed into the thin sleep pants and sleeveless shirt all made out of cotton jersey and was very comfortable and climbed into the bed and settled on his side. A few moments later both Bee's and Ratchet's holoforms appeared next to his bed, and saw Ratchet's peds disappear for a few minutes to return and place a small box where his holoform could reach it.
With in minutes he was hooked up to a saline drip to rehydrate him, a nutrient drip to feed him, a heart monitor to keep track of his vitals and another machine to keep track of his brain waves.
“Sleep, Sam.” Bee murmured running his fingers gently over his hair as Ratchet stuck a needle into his IV and depressed the plunger, after a few moments he felt his eyes get heavier and gave Bee a tired sleepy smile before he was dragged down into sleep.
**
Sam woke slowly and calmly, something that he hadn't done in months and felt a smile tug at his lips and slowly opened his eyes, blinking a few times taking in the dim room he was in and shifted a little to see what was in the brighter area to see two large peds and the bottom half of shins and then took note of the grumbling above him.
“...bored.” Optimus grumbled.
“If you didn't get injured then you wouldn't be confined to bed to recover to get bored.” Ratchet growled, it was followed by the sound of something solid hitting metal and a exclamation of pain from big bot and Sam chuckled and then there was a pause.
“Ratchet, why is Sam under my medical bed?” Optimus asked in a calm voice.
“He's recovering from his final exams and being sick.” Ratchet grumbled as his holoform appeared by his bed. “How are you feeling, Sam?” He asked as his mech form went on berating his leader about not taking better care of himself.
“Better, I actually feel awake and don't have a headache.” Sam smiled at him as he felt scans being taken.
“You should feel better, you've been asleep for four days.” Ratchet informed him look a little more relaxed then he had a few moments ago. “You are still underweight but that's going to take awhile to put back on.” He calmly began unhooking Sam from the different machines and the IV. “today I want you to take it easy, eat something after you've showered, see how you sleep tonight, then I want you back here tomorrow after you've eaten breakfast, when ever that is for a few more scans.”
“Sure, Ratchet.” Sam nodded sitting up slowly and just sat on the edge for a moment before he tried standing, then got dressed once he was sure he was steady on his feet.
“Stay away from anything too greasy for a few days.” Ratchet warned before his holoform disappeared and his peds started walking away. “Oh and wait for Bumblebee to come get you or you'll probably be dodging peds of mech's who don't watch where they are walking.” He warned before he disappeared from view.
Sam looked up from pulling his shoes on when he heard Optimus's almost sub-vocal whirl-chirp-click and finished lacing up his shoes and then made his way up the human sized ladder up onto the mech sized bed and climbed up on to Optimus's shoulder so he could see him easily enough.
He could see the pride, amusement and worry in the big bot's eyes and flushed a little as he realised he had acted on Optimus's Cybertronian call with out any help. He looked over Optimus's frame and shook his head.
“You've been letting 'Con use you for target practice again I see.” He teased.
“Not for long they didn't.” Optimus chuckled softly. “How are you doing?” He asked seriously, the concern in his eyes deepened.
“Better then I have in awhile.” He admitted softly. “I know not much gets past you big guy.” He ducked his head for a moment and then met his glowing eyes. “I do my best not to lie to you.”
“I know, it's why I don't push.” Optimus rumbled and raised his other arm and gently caressed his back before lowering it. “You will tell me when you are ready.”
“I'm grateful for that I really am.” Sam nodded. “How are the new Autobots settling in?” He asked changing the subject.
“They are learning much like we did.” Optimus sighed. “There was a reason I gave them a download of everything that's happened.” He grumbled.
“Sometimes things have to be experienced for ones self before you believe.” Sam advised with a small smile.
“Very true, boy.” Optimus nodded in agreement. “You didn't go to see your parents?”
“They are travelling again this summer, they left two weeks ago.” Sam shrugged with a smile. “They are enjoying it and I don't begrudge them a chance to finally get away and a have a bit a freedom now that they can do so.”
“You do not find that you miss them?” Optimus asked curiously.
“I do, some times so much that it makes me ache. But they deserve some time just for them, after all they kinda put their life on hold the raise me and now that I'm grown and in college they can do whatever they want and don't have to worry about me.” he nodded. “I'll see them when they get back and no doubt be embarrassed and annoyed at their fussing even though I missed it while they were gone.” He shrugged.
“How much do you understand?” Optimus asked gently, changing the subject but it didn't surprise Sam at all.
“A fair bit, can't do it myself don't have the right vocals for it, I can read some of your writings and a few words here and there but again I can't speak it without ruining my voice for days.” He shrugged it off. “Bee translates when I ask and I memorise it for later use.”
“If you would like some practice let me know, it will be nice to do something other then be diplomatic or stuck in pointless meetings all the time.” Optimus offered.
“I'll need something to do in a few days when I start getting bored with no school work to do.” Sam nodded smiling and then looked over his shoulder when he felt the familiar steps of Bumblebee and grinned in greeting. “Hi Bee!” He felt his cheeks warm at Bee's Cybertronian greeting and Optimus chuckled.
“Ready for some food?” Bee asked reaching out a hand and Sam climbed on.
“After I shower and change.” Sam nodded pleased that he actually felt hungry for a change. “How long are you here for Big guy?” Sam asked looking back to Optimus.
“Three days.” Optimus grumbled.
“I'll pop back tomorrow to keep you company if you want, ask a few of those questions I've been wondering about.” Sam offered. “Keep you from boredom for a few hours at least, if Ratchet doesn't chase me back out.” He glanced at the medic who snorted near by.
“It would be my pleasure, Samuel.” Optimus nodded.
“It's a deal then, for now get some recharge that you've been neglecting.” Sam chided waggling a finger at him as Bee carrying him off and snickered at Ratchet's smug look as they passed.
A quick trip to their quarters had Sam showered and in clean clothes and then carried to what he guessed was the human area and he was lowered and placed in front of double doors.
“The Mess area.” Bee stated looking confused. “Lennox said it's the food area.”
“I'll explain it later.” Sam promised and Bee nodded his confusion fading from his face.
“I have an errand to run, but will be back in an hour. Don't go to the Mech side with out an escort, the others haven't gotten into the habit of looking down when they walk yet.” Bee warned.
“Noted, I'll wait or find someone to carry me over.” Sam assured him. “And get them to let you know.”
“Good.” Bee nodded, transformed and sped off.
Sam pushed the door open and glanced around until he found the buffet set up and grabbed a tray and placed a small bowl of jello on it, then browsed the different foods on offer, hot dogs, burgers, lasagne, pizza, salads and sandwiches. He sighed as his picked up a ham and egg sandwich and a small serving of potato salad, what he really wanted was a hamburger and pizza, then grabbed a mug of coffee adding sugar and milk before he turned and looked over the few tables already full and made his way for an empty table.
He was half way through his meal when two other trays dropped onto the table and then grinned at Will and Rob as they sat down, returning his smile a little more tiredly.
“We weren't expecting you for at least a month, Sam.” Will greeted him before taking a large bite of his burger and then stared at Sam's meal.
“Parents left two weeks ago so I didn't see a point in going home.” Sam shrugged.
“What's with the healthy?” Rob Epps demanded looking at his meal. “You been sick?”
“Yeah, I've been here for four days.” Sam nodded and saw their surprised look. “Ratchet released me an hour ago.”
“Must have been bad for him to keep you that long.” Will frowned. “You forget to look after yourself?”
“Not really, everything that went around campus I caught.” Sam shook his head. “I was forever in catch up mode when I was sick.” He paused to take the last few bites of his sandwich and sipped at his coffee to see how his stomach took it and smiled slightly as he set it down. He looked up and met Will's eyes and saw concern and then realisation in them.
“Nightmares?” Will asked softly so only they heard.
“Them too.” Sam sighed. “I spent the last four days sedated just so I could recover.” He admitted. “Hence the healthy rather then what I really wanted. I didn't want to make myself sick.”
“replays or mind tricks?” Will asked firmly setting his burger down.
“Second. It's scary how...gruesome and creative our brains can be...” Sam shuddered and felt himself pale and pushed his potato salad away but began picking at his jello.
“You react to sounds? Swear you sometimes see things while awake?” Will asked seriously and closed his eyes for a moment when Sam stilled and nodded ever so slightly. “PTSD, it takes awhile but things get better if you don't ignore it.”
“Not planning to now that I'm somewhere safe.” Sam assured him softly. “I'm seeing Ratchet again tomorrow for more scans and probably a few lectures.” He smiled slightly. “Optimus being in there saved me from mine for the day at least.”
“Here.” Rob dug into a few different pockets and pulled out a bright blue and yellow pin and handed over. “The guys will see that and know not to rough house around you, you wear it in sight at all times.”
“Take it and wear it, we've all worn then at one time or another the last two years.” Will said firmly. “No one will think less of you for it.”
“Even you?” Sam asked in a small voice as he picked up the pin and stared at it for a moment.
“Even me, mine only recently came off a few months ago.” Will nodded as Sam pinned it to the front of his shirt in plain view.
“You talking to someone?” Rob asked eating his own burger in a few big bites.
“I talk to Bee and I'll talk to Ratchet, no so sure that they completely understand how strange and powerful the human brain can be.” Sam admitted eating his jello in a few bites and set the empty bowl on the empty plate and pulled his coffee cup closer. “I don't want to talk to a shrink because they can't really understand what exactly we went through if they weren't there, it's not as if it was a typical war zone.”
“While that is true we do have a good one on base.” Will suggested then paused and heaved a sigh. “You can't because of your extreme closeness to the Autobots, you know things that they won't or can't tell us right?”
“Yeah.” Sam nodded glumly. “It's easier that way, for explaining the differences and the cultural gaps. I'm sworn to secrecy much like a medic is or a shrink.”
“Much like I am with Ironhide being with me all the time and asking questions.” Will nodded in understanding. “Makes it harder to talk when you need too.” Will picked up his burger and ate it absently.
“So the question becomes who would be best to talk to among the bots...” Rob rubbed at a cheek for a moment. “One who can see possibilities, creative and...well they've all been through multiple battles and traumas...”
“See possibilities...” Will repeated slowly. “Prowl is the only one I can think off, his got a huge battle computer in his head for helping him plan battles and whatnot, he'll be able to put together what you're seeing easily enough, especially since the others gave then visual download on everything that's happened since they arrived.” He spoke thoughtfully. “He's not as bad as everyone says he is, it's because of the battle computer in his set up that he's very closed off, it takes up a lot of his processing space, he can have all the emotions or the battle computer but not both at the same time.” Will explained at Sam's frown. “He's very by the book guy but while he won't admit it he finds some of the pranks funny and is impressed at how some of them are pulled off. He just doesn't show it.”
“I'll talk to Optimus at who is the best to talk to...even some of what I know I only speak to him about.” Sam shrugged sipping at his coffee, he tilted his head as he heard a horn honk followed by a few whirls and clicks and looked at Will who had frowned. “It's Ironhide.”
“You do understand them.” Will's eyes widened in surprise and pleasure.
“Not a lot.” Sam shook his head. “Not everything, just enough to know who is who and sometimes the gist of what they are saying.”
“So what's he calling me when he makes that noise?” Will asked as he gathered everything on to his tray, getting ready to leave.
“Warrior/Brother in arms.” Sam translated roughly. “There is more then that but it's mostly lost in translation.” Sam gathered up his own tray. “Can I get a lift to my quarters? I'm in Mech land with Bee.”
“Sure.” Will nodded. They dumped their trays and headed out. “Hey, can we drop Sam off at his place?”
“Sure, where he at?” Ironhide rumbled.
“I'm with Bee.” Sam spoke up climbing in to the back seat. “Can you let him know you dropped me off?”
“Not a problem.” Ironhide agreed driving them away from the human section and pulled up in front of Bee's quarters fifteen minutes later.
“Thanks.” Sam slid out and walked into their quarters and made for his room. He sat at his desk and opened a draw he'd stored his note books from school in and pulled out a blank one and began writing out questions that he wanted to ask Optimus and wrote out a long list of things he needed to keep himself occupied for the summer.
**
Sam made his way back to the infirmary on his own the next morning, a backpack full of note books, making sure to stick close to the buildings where he wouldn't accidently get trodden on or have to dodge out of the way of large peds. A quick glance told him that Ratchet wasn't around and made his way to Optimus's side. When he wasn't greeted as his feet started climbing the stairs he figured that the big bot was still in recharge and made himself comfortable on the top on the stairs and pulled out his most recent note book which was almost full and a pencil and continued where he had left off while waiting for Optimus to wake.
After waiting half an hour and finishing off his note book his glanced at Optimus again and tilted his head to listen to his...mechanics and sighed. He was still in deep recharge, it would probably be another few hours before he was ready to wake, so he packed up and headed back to his shared quarters.
He dug around for his wallet, cell phone, keys that really were more for show then anything else since he'd handed in his dorm room keys when he'd left for the summer and his parents house keys and the list of things he'd wanted to buy and sent a text to Bee.
'Need to go buy some things to keep occupied. U or any1 else free?'
'Hide and Will free, on their way, they're bored. Wish I was free. I'm bored.' Bee texted back. 'But I need the training. Have fun.'
'Try not to recharge on ur feet from boredom.' Sam slid his cell in to his pocket as 'Hide pulled into the front of the hanger and easily swung up into the passenger side.
“So what do you need?” Will asked as 'Hide reversed out and headed for the 'shopping' area on the other side of the island a few miles away.
Sam passed the list over, knowing that it would be faster then listing everything. “There an art store or something there?” He asked a few moments later when Will handed the list back.
“There is, it's rather new so I don't know what they have, but a few of the soldiers were talking about it a few weeks back about being able to restock their supplies for their hobbies.” Will nodded. “Why do you need that many note books? What about your laptop?”
“It broke two weeks ago I haven't been able to replace it yet and it's doesn't do glyphs.” Sam shrugged.
“Glyphs?” Will frowned. “You still seeing those?”
“Only sometimes, I write them down when I wake. Some Bee doesn't recognise so I have to wait until Optimus is up to see if he recognised them to get a translation.” Sam stared out the window as he spoke. “It feels wrong to try and draw the glyphs on the computer....” He frowned. “I did try a few weeks ago because I was getting frustrated over something, it didn't work right after that so...” He shrugged.
“Fair enough, it's usually a good things to keep their writing away from computers unless they are made to deal with it.” Will agreed nodding in understanding. “How much you go for this trip? Just what you have on the list is going to cost you a few hundred plus the two grand for the laptop if not more.”
“I've been saving up for a shopping trip from the allowance I get from Optimus.” He chuckled as 'Hide spluttered and weaved a little on the road. “Yeah I figured it out, I haven't said anything since he thought he was being so sneaky.” He smiled as both Will and 'Hide snickered. “I've been saving up for months, just buying what I needed at the time.”
“So how much have you saved up?” Will asked curious. “How much was he sending you a month?”
“Too much.” Sam grumbled. “I get six grand a month, it started out as more until I threw a fit, so I guess Bee reported it to Optimus, I barely spend two hundred a week, would be more but I don't have to pay for fuel which is great.” He smiled. “I've saved up a lot.”
“How much is a lot?” Will frowned making some calculations in his head.
“Enough to make a deposit on a house if I wanted.” He gave Will a dryly amused look as he spluttered. “Around forty thousand, maybe more, I haven't dared look at my bank account in over eight months, when I ask Bee he just says that I'm good when I worry about buying new shoes.”
“Yeah, I don't think you have to worry about overspending for awhile.” Will said in a half choked voice. “As long as you don't go overboard.”
“Yeah that was my thought.” Sam nodded as 'Hide pulled in and parked in the small parking lot in front of a small mall.
“What do you want to grab first?” Will asked as they slid out of 'Hide's cab.
“Computer and clothes first, then hobby stuff.” Sam decided and followed as Will led the way to the four clothing stores. He grabbed a four pairs of everything.
“Why do you need so much clothes?” Will asked confused.
“You remember that attack on the way back from Spring break?” Sam asked as he picked out four t-shirts and tossed them into the trolley he'd grabbed then began picking through the button down shirts.
“Yeah.”
“Bee shifted with all my gear in his trunk, I lost eight days worth of changes, nearly my entire wardrobe, when we got back I just didn't have to time to replace much unless it was falling apart and I had to do a clothes run.” Sam explained as he tossed four good choices into the trolley, a ten pack of briefs, five boxers, two ten pack of socks, three pairs of shorts, five pairs of jeans in two different sizes for when he started putting back on weight, three pairs of dress pants.
“That should have been included in the expense report.” Will frowned.
“Bee said he told Optimus later and the money had been placed in my account so I could replace everything but I just didn't have time.” Sam shrugged grabbing two pairs of sneakers and tried on a pair of work boots to check the fit before tossing them in and made his way to the check out.
“College is really running you down isn't it?” Will asked softly as everything was scanned and packed into bags.
“Yeah, but I'm enjoying it, in the 'I don't have time to breathe' way.” Sam chuckled nodded pulling out his bank card when the lady at the till gave him the total and swiped his card and tapped in the pin. “But at the same time, I'm kinda bored.” He added as they felt the clothes store and Will led him to a computer store and he began browsing through the different laptops, a quick word to the salesman had his laptop added to his trolley and they were leaving, heading back to 'Hide to unload.
“Bored?” Will asked as they piled everything into the back seat. “You just said that you don't have time to breathe...how can you be bored?”
“Classes seem to easy, the main reason I'm so busy is because I'm always playing catch up.” Sam sighed as he returned the trolley and they headed for the large art store.
“Catch up? Why are you always falling behind?” Will asked as Sam began browsing the shelves.
“Everything that goes around the campus I catch.” Sam grimaced. “It was only reason I was bored was because of my nightmares, I wasn't sleeping, so I was doing my assignments when I was having a good day.”
“Did you pass your classes?” Will asked in concern.
“Seventy percent average, some were closer to eighty five percent.” Sam nodded with a proud look on his face.
“I'm guessing that's why you just spent four days unconscious then.” Will sighed.
“Not unconscious, sedated.” Sam corrected looking around for a basket or trolley to start loading his purchases in. He grabbed two baskets and began filling them with note books, two reams of thick art paper, colouring markers and pencils, sketching pencils, three art journals, twelve cans of hand sized paint so he could mix his own paints, paint brushes, paint solvent, small plastic tubs with lids for the paint he'd mix, a few other painting things he'd need, pop sticks, tooth picks, glue, thin wire, a solder iron.
“Can they deliver to the base?” Sam asked as they carried the two full baskets to the counter to be scanned, and he took note of the sign on the back wall announcing that they do deliveries.
“Yeah, someone picks it up at the front gate and then takes it to who ever it belongs too.” Will nodded. “Whole town does. Now that you have your laptop I'll show you the website for online shopping this place does.”
“Good, what I've been thinking of will need delivering.”
“What were you after?” The sales clerk asked still scanning everything through. “If we don't have it we can order it from else where for you.”
“Three mill thick cardboard sheet six feet by nine, three of them if possible. A few feet of aluminium about soda can thickness easily cut and bent and two sheets of something about three or four mill thick of something more sturdy and won't bend under weight, eight by twelve.” As he spoke the clerk jotted down what he wanted. “Do you have metal cutters, hole stud and the like for working with metal?”
“We can order them, we don't keep them in stock.” He nodded scanning the last of his items and began searching for what Sam wanted. “It depends on what you are doing for what you need.”
“Building a city model in my spare time.” Sam grinned.
“Have fun with that.” The clerk chuckled as he clicked a few things. “I can have them here in a week.”
“I'll pay now if you don't mind.”
“We prefer it.” The clerk nodded. “You sure you want Aluminium? Not something else that won't crumple if you press to hard or knock it? We have something similar that's tougher but just as easy to cut and mold.”
“As long as it can easily be cut, molded and be painted.” Sam shrugged. “And the cost isn't a huge difference.”
“Five dollar a foot difference, the other stuff is cheaper.”
“Then I'll take it.”
“How many feet?”
“Hmm.” Sam frowned thinking it over. “Eight, if I need more I can order it.”
“All ordered, I just need a name and base.” He smiled.
“Mr B. Bumble.” Will spoke up before Sam could. “Base is the one twenty miles east, I've only heard it called Diego Garcia...” He shrugged.
“You've been here a year and you still don't know the base name?” Sam chuckled shaking his head.
“We call it DGDB” The clerk shrugged adding that info. “Diego Garcia Dock Base. We don't know what it's called either.” He winced. “That will be three thousand two hundred and five dollars and seventy five cents.”
“Ouch.” Will winced as Sam pulled out his card again. “Need to get you a cheaper hobby kid.”
Sam just poked his tongue out at him as he punched in his pin and accepted the four bags of his purchases and accepted the receipt and the pending order slip.
“That's nearly nine thousand just this trip Sam.” Will laughed shaking his head as they loaded 'Hide and then climbed in. “Give me that order slip, I'll pass it to the gate guard, they'll need it to make sure it matches what turns up.”
“Sure.” Sam dug it out of his pocket and handed it over.
“Why metal?”
“Less likely to crumple then paper and I can't do it in plastic.” Sam shrugged. “Plus it will take longer so I'll have plenty to do.”
“You going artist on us?” Will smiled joking.
“I have images in my head I need to get out, it's the only way I can think of to do it.” Sam shrugged turning his head to stare at Will. “Most of it will never be shown to anyone and probably burned.”
“It does make good therapy.” Will nodded in understanding.
“Ratchet would like to know where you are Sam.” Ironhide interrupted.
“I was there this morning for forty five minutes before I messaged Bee, no one was there besides Optimus and he was deep in recharge.” Sam sighed. “Tell him I'll be there soon.”
“You had a meeting with Ratchet?” Will frowned.
“Just another scan and probably a lecture, no one was there this morning when I went by.”
“And how did you get there, Bee was on the training grounds?” Ironhide demanded.
“I walked really close to the hangers where I wouldn't get stepped on, not that there were any Mech's around to dodge, but I made sure I was careful, I can't keep waiting on someone to carry me around when you all have other things that have to be done.” Sam pointed out sighing. “Maybe being in Mechland isn't such a good idea, there are places I have to get to and no one around to help me get there.” Sam muttered.
“The new Mech's need to get used to having Humans around, Sam but they rarely come into our area because they aren't used to having to look down or use their scanners to see where the humans are.” Ironhide snorted. “They need to slow down and pay attention, that's why Optimus approved Will and you staying with us, I'll talk it over with the others to make a no go zone where you can walk freely.”
“As long as we stay close to the hangers we aren't in danger of being stepped on and as long as we check the hanger doors before we walk in front of them we'll be fine.” Sam pointed out.
“I'll tell the others.” Ironhide agreed as they pulled into Bee's hanger.
Will helped him to unload his haul, dumping it all on his bed.
“Thanks, guys for the help.”
“We were bored.” Will shrugged with a smile. “Don't forget to eat.”
“I ate this morning. As soon as Ratchet releases me I'll eat.” Sam nodded, watching as they left and emptied his pockets, but kept his cell phone and grabbed his back pack and headed back to the infirmary.
“You were here earlier?” Ratchet asked as he walked in the doors.
“For nearly an hour.” Sam nodded. “Optimus was in recharge so I waited for awhile, I was coming back after lunch.” He allowed Ratchet to pick him up and set him on the nearest bed and sat cross legged setting his bag and phone to one side and waited as he felt a number of scans run across his skin.
“Did you eat this morning?”
“Fruit. Two apples, a banana and an orange.” Sam nodded.
“May I?” Ratchet asked one hand hovering really close to his head and Sam nodded and felt a few large fingers tips touch his head. “How did you sleep?”
“I got six hours, while I didn't wake up screaming I did have a nightmare.” He shrugged. “Best sleep I've had in months besides what I got under your care.”
“You go without four hours of sleep a night for more then three days tell me and I'll give you some sleeping pills that will knock you into deep sleep for seven hours, you need sleep to heal.” Ratchet said sternly. “Your immune system is a little depressed but it is slowly recovering, no signs of anything more serious.” Sam felt something in him relax a little at that news. “Your brain scans have changed a little from the last lot I took after Egypt when you last gave me permission to do a deep scan.”
“I'm using more of my brain?” Sam guessed.
“You are, three more percent, which is what was probably causing the headaches.” Ratchet nodded removing his hand from Sam's head. “You are up to twenty one percent, while most humans only use about ten to twelve.” He studied him for a moment. “Classes seem easier?”
“Yeah, I was getting bored.” Sam nodded glumly. “I have nearly perfect recall on anything written that I see, not so much on events that I see but even that is getting a little better.”
“I'll keep an eye on your scans then, I want you here as soon as you arrive for break, I want at least two to four scans a year.”
“Done.” Sam nodded.
“I need you to keep track of what you notice changing, Sam. You have been through a lot in the last three years and we just don't know how it will effect you long term.”
“Have been.” Sam reached out and dug out a small hand size note book and flipped through a dozen pages before he held it up and smiled as a scanner went over the pages and turned the page.
“Very detailed thank you.” Ratchet nodded, running through the information.
“I know it's highly unlikely and impossible but I'm not going to change into one of you right?” Sam asked tentatively.
“No, I don't believe so, I would have said impossible but with you being in contact with the All Spark and the matrix I'm not ruling anything out.” Ratchet gave a slight shake of his head. “You are probably becoming a more organic version of us, more memory and processing power then you had. Anything else I cannot even predict or guess what may happen but I doubt it will be that extreme...”
“Wait and see.” Sam nodded.
“Wait and see, keep track of any other changes you notice.” Ratchet agreed. “You have been finding it easier to understand us as well?”
“A few words here and there.” Sam nodded. “It's easier when I know the glyph that matches the words.” He hesitated for a moment.
“Something else?”
“I'm still seeing Glyphs in my sleep, I'm writing them down as I wake.” He gestured to his bag. “And Bee says that some times I sound like a sparkling in deep recharge who is happy and content, and my throat is usually sore in the morning.”
“You're....” Sam lifted his chin up as Ratchet aimed his arm at Sam and felt his throat tingle and then warm. “Your vocal cords are fine and normal but...”
“But?” Sam pushed when Ratchet paused.
“There is another set under them, very different to your human vocals, I'm guessing it's the closest it could get to ours since it's not mechanical.” He sounded bewildered and a little awed. “Something else we will have to keep track of, I'm guessing that at the moment that their use is complete instinctive and the soreness is because they aren't used to being used.”
“Noted.” Sam nodded taking in the news that something else was different.
“Is technology easier to use?”
“Somewhat.” Sam grimaced. “I don't like using it as much as I used to...at least human technology, I get frustrated fast with it.”
“Because it's too slow or just generally?” Ratchet inquired.
“Both.” Sam shrugged.
“Do you have an outlet for your emotions? Talking to someone about your nightmares isn't all there is to it.” Ratchet asked as his scanners slid back into his armour.
“Yes, I picked up a few things today for me to work on.” Sam nodded. “Have a few more pieces coming in next week.” He tilted his head. “Who do I talk to about getting a few tables made up to specifications?”
“Depends on how big.” Ratchet tilted his head slightly.
“One thirty by thirty feet will do and the other twenty by twenty feet. Human sized, just got find somewhere to stick it where Bee won't trip over them.”
“I'll put in an order for you, should have them in a few days.” Ratchet nodded. “What are they for if you don't mind me asking?”
“I'm going to build model cities.” Sam shrugged. “Something to do.”
“May I see when you are done?” He inquired.
“It'll be a long time, I doubt I'll get more then a third done this summer.” Sam warned as he nodded.
“Good, something to look forward to then.” Ratchet smiled. “You're good to go, eat something...eat what your body craves as long as it's not too greasy, but don't force yourself to eat if you're not hungry, nibble on fruit if that's the case.”
“Will do.” Sam nodded and glanced over his shoulder. “He allowed visitors?”
“As long as it is not work.” Ratchet grumbled.
“My glyphs? Do they count?” Sam inquired with a grin.
“No, it'll stop him from grumbling.” Ratchet snorted and as soon as Sam had his phone and bag carried him over to Optimus and set him down on the big bot's chest. “One visitor.” He announced before he walked off.
“Morning Optimus.” Sam greeted setting his bag down and pulled out the first two note books he had written. “This will be easier to show you with your holoform.” His smiled widened a little at the Cybertronian greeting and then A man with jet black hair, bright blue eyes, jeans and a flannel shirt appeared beside him, sitting cross legged.
“I thought I wasn't allowed paperwork.” Optimus looked curious.
“This isn't official paper work.” Sam opened the first book and showed him the page filled with glyphs with a blank line under it for translation. “This is a tutorial.” He chuckled at the beaming smile he got. “This is the first book of many of glyphs I have been seeing in my dreams, these repeated themselves until I started writing them down, then more appeared.” he explained handing the first book over.
“This would be faster if I scanned these on to a datapad.” Optimus murmured after ten pages.
“Your datapad's are nearly three times as big as I am, it's like looking at a movie theatre screen.” Sam laughed. “I can't use one.”
“We've finally found a datapad that is compatible with ours that can easily be connected so we can share information.” Optimus explained chuckling. “All the officers have them now, I thought that Bee had gotten you one to help with your communications before his voice was fixed.”
“Oh he did.” Sam remembered the thing now. “It was destroyed during spring break, I never got a replacement.”
“Easily done.” Ratchet called from the other side of the room and walked over with one human datapad and a Cybertronian one before disappearing again.
“How many of these are there?”
“Currently about thirty.” Sam shrugged at Optimus's surprised look. “So what have I been writing about?”
“A mix of different things, it jumps all over the place, but there's religion, history, science, medical text, star charts so far.” Optimus answered as he flipped through the book scanning each page and then handed it back and Sam held out the next one for him to scan, they continued that until all eight books he had brought along had been scanned and then Optimus plugged into his datapad and transferred it over. “Once your pad is on a pale green screen will appear I want you to trace the glyph for...” He whirled, clicked and warbled. “That will be your user name and password.”
Sam had to look away fro a moment when he felt his eyes burn with tears until he got himself under control. -My fosterling/brother-. He knew if he changed a few vocals it would be the same as what he called Bee. -My Mechling- He wasn't a Mechling, since he was organic, which was why a lot of the time Optimus called him 'Boy'. Optimus had taken him under his wing to mentor and raise with his parents, a lot of the original team thought of him as a little brother/fosterling that they all looked after and he really didn't mind. The reason he was also called brother by Optimus was because he could use the matrix, because he had brought him back to life, because as scary and terrifying as it was he was also a Prime.
He looked back and drew the glyphs as requested and watched as it glowed brighter for a moment and then a blank menu appeared briefly before a few applications began appearing and then a white screen appeared covered in the glyphs he had written appeared.
“You have it up?” Optimus asked a moment later and his nodded. “I want you to put the translation of the ones you know in, then we will go over the ones you don't know.”
It took him a moment to find the keyboard tab and to figure out how to translate a glyph, which was a easy as tapping said glyph and it would pop up closer with a cursor blinking under it ready for him to tap in the English word...even if there was two or three words for that single glyph.
**
