Chapter Text
His body collapsed.
A soul wrenching scream escaping his throat.
He lost him.
His world was falling apart, the walls crushing in, as his grip on reality crumbled around him.
His vision was blurry, he could barely make out the body falling to the ground, the sound of a dull thud reaching his ears.
Seconds that felt like years dragged by, whimpers leaving his mouth as he watched his son laying on the ground, unconscious.
He felt his breath quicken, an all encompassing tightness gripping his chest. He’d been through this before, so many times that he should have been used to it. He'd watched his brothers and sisters leave their lives on the battlefield countless times, but this was different. This was his son. His innocent boy . There was no way he could ever get used to that…
A gut tearing scream dragged him from the sea of disbelief and despair he was drowning in. Causing his head to snap towards the noise.
Sully’s older daughter was kneeling on the ground beside Spider, clutching his hand, sending prayers to the Great Mother.
"No, no, no!" She cried, streaks of tears adorning her face.
He wanted to cry as well.
He wanted to scream.
But he couldn't, he felt…empty… nothing.
He'd just lost the most important thing in his life . His reason to keep going, the one and only thing he had left…
Another scream ripped through the air. Drawing his attention as his eyes focused and his senses returned. With quick steps he made his way over to his son, pushing Sully’s daughter away to cradle the boy in his arms.
He ignored the sob she choked out. This wasn’t about her. This was about Spider. This was about his son.
"Spider…" he whispered in a broken voice. "My sweet, sweet Spider. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry son. I-" His voice gave in as new tears fell from his eyes. "I took you with me to keep you alive-" regret was dripping from his voice. "-but I wasn't enough… I couldn't save you. This is my fault and now you're… gone. " He almost couldn't force the last word through his lips.
Gone.
He'd gotten his son killed.
"I was so selfish." Tears continued falling down his cheeks, hoping his son would return to him, praying that this only was a dream. A bad dream… a nightmare.
He looked up at the sky, his eyes drowning in tears. Oh he deserved this. He absolutely deserved this pain, this agony, but Spider didn’t.
His Spider didn’t deserve an end like this.
When he looked down again he saw his hands drenched in blood. Covered in the blood of his child. His son .
What would Paz think about him? He promised her he would keep Spider safe. He did the exact opposite and she would despise him for failing.
"Now you know what it is like to lose a child." A voice hissed as a hand wound in his hair jerking his head back. The cold feel of a knife pressing into his throat.
The same knife that took Spider's life… The blade was already cutting his skin, drops of blood finding their way down his neck.
He felt acceptance.
"Now you will live with the pain of your failure." Neytiri’s voice was sharp, her words cutting him just like the blade of her knife cut Spider.
He didn't respond.
"A son for a son." She hissed.
Without a second thought he threw himself forward, the blade of the knife slitting his throat.
'I love you Spider.' His last thought, his last tribute, his last and only purpose.