Chapter Text
Shouyou and Kageyama weren’t friends. They were rivals; no longer enemies, but they were driven by each other to be the best; to be better . They had learned how to cooperate with one another, and they behave more like teammates than they did at the beginning. But they still argued. It was typically just some angry banter over things that nobody else cared about except for them. They’d still wrestle in doorways, they’d race, fight over who got to talk to Daichi about their training first. But it never got more intense than maybe a couple of soft shoves and some not-so-kind words that didn’t really matter.
But sometimes, rarely, they fought.
This was one of those times.
“I'm doing my best, Kageyama, but it’s hard to spike when your sets are so off-centered.”
Kageyama was fuming. “My sets are not off-centered, you just can’t see two feet ahead of you!”
“Yeah? Well, maybe that’s because you keep setting the ball into my fucking face-”
“Hinata, language!”
Daichi, Suga, and Tanaka watched from the side of the court as Shouyou and Kageyama fought over who was doing what wrong. Daichi was used to their arguments, but he was not going to have the vice principal walk into the gym while Shouyou was swearing like a sailor. The two had already gotten onto his bad side on day one.
“It can’t possibly be that difficult to look at a ball and fucking spike it-”
“Oh please, don’t act like you’re perfect all the time. Your sets are getting sloppy, and they never go where you want them to anymore because you’re too worried about my god damn spikes. I thought you’d learned how to be a team player, Kageyama. I thought you knew now that everyone makes mistakes, even you.”
And before Shouyou could stop himself, the words were out of his mouth.
“I guess you’re still the same
king of the court
who you always fucking have been.”
Shouyou was met with a fist to the face before he could say the words “Tiny Giant”.
He regretted what he said, sure. But he only regretted it because it earned him a punch to the face, not because he felt bad for what he said, or because he didn’t mean it. In fact, he meant every word. Kageyama's serves were off, and he was being a court dictator in a way that Shouyou hadn’t seen in a while; not since the early weeks of practice.
The pain from the punch finally set in.
“...Ow, you mother f-” Shouyou stopped himself. Something was seriously wrong.
Kageyama was crying.
He wasn’t sobbing. He wasn’t sniffling. He was breathing heavily in rage, and maybe a bit of pain, with tears rolling silently down his cheeks.
Shit.
He hadn’t said anything that bad, had he? He had just critiqued his sets and called him the king of the court. Okay, maybe that was pretty bad, but it was well deserved. Still, he felt guilty. The two of them argued; they always had, and they always would. But it was always over their rivalry. Over who was better, faster, whatever the situation may be. Shouyou had never actually made Kageyama cry before.
Kageyama left the gym, tears streaming down his face.
Shouyou had gone to the nurse for an ice pack. The nurse was an old woman with eye bags so big they were designer. She did not look happy to be a nurse.
“Name?”
“Hinata Shouyou.”
“Injury?”
“Punch to the face.”
“Reason for injury?”
“...I was being a dick?”
The nurse glanced up from beneath her bifocals with a blank stare. “I meant who punched you, wise guy.”
“Ah. Kageyama Tobio.”
“I see. I will call the office and make sure that this is dealt with.”
“No, no, that’s not necessary. I don’t know what I did, but I think I upset him or something. I just want an ice pack.”
Shouyou watched as the woman sighed. “Well, unfortunately I have to do something, even if it’s just counseling.” The nurse took out a stack of passes and wrote out two. “Here. Take one and give the other to your… whatever. Tobo, or whoever he is.”
“It’s Tobio. ”
“Whatever. Give the other to Tobio, and meet Ms. Suzuki in her office.” She checked her watch. “I expect you to be there by 3:00.”
Shouyou bowed, however half hearted it may have been. “Thank you, Ms. Nurse Lady.” He turned to leave, but quickly remembered why he even came in the first place. “Wait, are you gonna give me that ice pack?”
"No."
Wow. If Shouyou knew any big words, he'd call that medical malpractice.
2:54. Kageyama should be in English class. Shouyou walked over, dreading having to see his rival. Lucky for him, Kageyama… wasn’t there?
Where Kageyama’s desk was, there was no backpack. No notebook. And most importantly, Kageyama. The teacher noticed Shouyou standing in the doorway and raised an eyebrow.
“Is there something I can help you with, young man?”
Shouyou looked around at all the eyes on him and cleared his throat. “Um. I have a pass for Kageyama Tobio to…” Hinata squinted at the piece of paper in his hands. “Ms. Suzuki’s office.”
The teacher’s eyes widened in recognition. “Ah. I’ve just sent him there, actually. No need for the pass.”
After a nod and a bow, Shouyou headed to Ms. Suzuki’s office. When he arrived, he heard the counselor already speaking to Kageyama inside.
Now, Shouyou knew it was wrong to eavesdrop. But he had to know what was wrong with Kageyama, and Shouyou wasn’t sure that he would give an honest answer with him in the room
Kageyama was silent for a long time. When he finally spoke, his voice came out smaller than Shouyou had ever heard it.
“...He called me the ‘King of the Court.’”
The counselor nodded. “That seems rather well-meant to elicit a punch in the face. Would you mind telling me why it bothers you.”
Kageyama took a deep breath and began to fidget with his hands.
“Something happened back in junior high at one of my games. My last junior high game, actually. I was… mean. And abrasive. And controlling. And people… well, they liked to call me a dictator. To my face and behind my back. Then this nickname started to catch on; “the King of the Court.” And, well, yeah. It’s not as nice as it sounds. But at that last game, I was stressed. I loved volleyball- still do. I really wanted to go far. So, I pushed my teammates. I tried to encourage them- I really did. But I guess it was more like yelling and harsh critique than anything else. And then, at that last game… I guess they finally had enough.”
Tears began to well up in Kageyama’s eyes again.
“When I set the ball in the middle of the game… no one came to spike it. In fact, no one was playing anymore. They all looked at me with that hatred filled expression and told me that they were sick of me. That they were done.”
The setter wiped his eyes with the backs of his hands, but to no avail. The tears were streaming down his face now.
“Those teammates- I didn’t like them. But I like my team here at Karasuno, even if I don’t show it well. Most of all, I like Hinata. Best spiker I’ve ever had, best rival, best teammate, best friend. I don’t want to lose that. I don’t- don’t want him to hate me. To leave me like they did. Don’t want him to leave me alone on that court- not when we’ve talked about playing together forever. I can’t let him down like I did everyone else.”
The counselor opened her mouth to speak, but Kageyama wasn’t done.
“But the thing is, I know Hinata isn’t perfect. So when he messes up, I wanna let him know. So he can be better. So we can be better. But I don’t know how to critique people without sounding like a total ass. And sometimes I end up insulting him. And we argue. And I hate it. But I’m- I’m not perfect either, and I’m horrible at admitting that to myself, much less to anyone else. And I wanna be better for my team, specifically for Hinata. I don’t wanna be a dictator anymore.
“But it’s more than that. Hinata is a rival, a teammate, and maybe a friend. But he’s- he's more than that to me. He’s one of the only people I really care about, and one of the only people that sometimes makes me feel like I’m cared for. And- I wanna keep that. I wanna stay with him. I wanna be the person I should be for him- the person he needs- but I don’t know how.”
Kageyama ended his rant, his chest heaving and tears rolling down his face.
The counselor pushed up her glasses. “Tobio, have you ever considered telling Hinata any of this?”
Kageyama huffed. “Absolutely not.”
“...But I think you should, Tobio. You’ve described him as someone you care about. I think he needs to know that, and I think he needs you to own up to your flaws. If he’s as good as you say he is, he won’t judge you for it. It’s like you said; Hinata isn’t perfect, either. He has his flaws too.”
The setter pulled at his hair. “I’m scared. ”
Ms. Suzuki nodded. “But don’t you think it’s best you let your feelings out to the person you care about?”
Reluctantly, Kageyama nodded. And, with footsteps quiet as humanly possible, Shouyou walked into the room.
Ms. Suzuki looked up at the door. “Ah, hello. I’m afraid I’m in a session right now-”
“I’m Hinata Shouyou. The nurse told me to get Kageyama and take him here, but his teacher already sent him.” Kageyama looked up at the ginger with wide eyes. “Uh. Hi, Kags.”
Kageyama blinked. “Your face is bruised.”
“Yeah. You kinda did that.”
“How long have you been here?”
“Since you said ‘He called me the King of the Court.’” Shouyou moved his fingers up and down in air-quotes.
Kageyama pulled at his hair again. “Shit. That long?”
“...Yeah.” Shouyou sat down in the chair next to Kageyama. “Why didn’t you tell me all of that?”
Kageyama rubbed his hand over his face. “I didn’t want you to hate me. Didn’t want you to hear about how I treated my teammates and then- and then think that I don’t deserve to set for you anymore.”
Shouyou gave his setter an incredulous look. “Is that what you thought would happen?”
Kageyama nodded.
Shouyou smacked him upside the head.
“Ow! What the hell was that for, asshole?”
“Payback for you punching me. And also because you’re an idiot.”
“Wha- How am I an idiot!?”
Shouyou rolled his eyes. “ Kageyama. You are the best setter I’ve ever had. You’re my favorite rival-”
“
You have other rivals?”
“And I want you to keep setting for me.
Forever.
I wanna be on a college team with you. Wanna be on the Tokyo Olympic team. I don’t care that you yell. We can work through it. You’re my favorite setter. Who else will set for me with my eyes closed? Who else would stay at the gym practicing with me until 11:00 at night?
Nobody,
that’s who. You can be a real asshole sometimes. But you’re my best friend, I think.”
Kageyama’s eyes began to tear up again. Man, he sure was crying a lot.
He turned to look at Shouyou.
“But- I punched you.”
“And I served a volleyball into the back of your head during a game.”
Shouyou watched as Kageyama stared at his lap, deep in thought.
“Look. I know you have shitty social skills.”
“ Hey!”
“But I don’t care about that. I was angry today, before you yelled at me. I wouldn’t have called you the King of the Court otherwise. I know you hate it. You’re bad at expressing your emotions, but I don’t care. Because no one sets for me the way you do. No one ruffles my hair, pays attention to me 24/7 to tell me what I’m doing wrong, helps me learn how to serve neven when I suck, buys me meat buns after games, no one pushes me like you do. I wanna stay with you, too.”
“Hinata?”
“Yeah?”
“Shut up or I think I’ll start crying harder.”
Shouyou giggled softly and turned to the counselor. “Sorry for barging in.”
Ms. Suzuki smiled at him. “No worries. You were supposed to be here, anyway, and I think Tobio really needed that. You two are good friends.”
Shouyou gave her a wide grin, while Kageyama merely nodded. With a quizzical expression, Ms. Suzuki spoke again. “Shouyou, could you go wait in the office? No eavesdropping this time. I’d like to have a confidential conversation with Tobio.”
The ginger nodded. “Sure!”
“Tobio.”
Tobio looked up from his hands. “Mm?”
“You didn’t look too happy when I referred to the two of you as ‘good friends’.”
After sitting with his thoughts for a minute, Kageyama shrugged. “I guess that’s because… we aren’t? I wouldn’t call us friends. I care about him more than anything, really, and he’s great at volleyball, but it’s different than friendship. He’s more of my part…” A look of understanding washed over Tobio’s face. “...Partner.” He face-planted into his hands again. “ Shit. ”
Ms. Suzuki looked at Tobio with a small smile. “I see. You like him, don’t you? Maybe even love him?”
“ Fuck. ”
She let out a quiet laugh. “ Language, Tobio. But honestly? I think you’ll be okay. Regardless of if he does or doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, he wouldn’t let that ruin your close bond. He cares about you too.”
“I can’t lose him, Ms. Suzuki. I can’t ruin this because of my stupid feelings. I can’t risk it.”
Ms. Suzuki glanced at her watch. “You don’t have to tell him anything until you’re ready. And I’m so very sorry to cut you off, but we actually went overtime, and I have another student to prepare for. Have a lovely evening, Tobio, and I wish you the best of luck.”
With a grim look and a quiet mutter of a thank you, Tobio walked out of the office, shutting the door with a click.
Shouyou was still in the office waiting for Kageyama to come back.
“Hinata.”
Shouyou looked up at the setter with bright eyes. “Kageyama!”
“...Wanna get meat buns?”
“I never say no to meat buns.”
“But you’re paying.”
“ What? You punched me!”
“You insulted me.”
“You insulted me first!”
“...Fine. But you’re paying next time.” Shouyou grinned.
Everything should’ve been back to normal, but it wasn’t. There was a strange tension in the air.
They walked in silence until Shouyou decided to break it.
“...So what did you two talk about in there?”
“It was confidential. She said that already.”
Shouyou picked up a random rock. Why? He had no idea. “I know. But you can tell me anything, okay? You don’t have to, but I won’t judge you.”
Kageyama didn’t respond, so Shouyou thought that would be the end of the conversation.
But it wasn’t.
“Hinata?”
“Hm?”
“I think… Fuck. I think I’m gay.”
“Cool,” Shouyou replied nonchalantly. He threw the rock into a bush. “Me too, probably. I’ve never had a crush on a girl, but boys are pretty, and stuff.”
Kageyama tripped, sputtering.
“ What? ”
“Yeah. I guess I never really thought about it, but it makes sense. Like I said, I've never liked a girl, but I think I’ve liked guys.”
“...Oh. Okay.”
Shouyou raised an eyebrow. “Is that going to be a problem?” Kageyama smacked him upside the head.
“No, you moron. I just told you that I’m gay. Why would I have a problem with you being gay? That’s stupid.”
Shouyou hit him back.
“Mean Kageyama! How was I supposed to know? What if you have that thing where you hate gay people but you’re gay? Y’know… uh. I-Immortalized homophobia or something.”
“...Internalized homophobia?”
“Yeah! That. You could be a hippopotamus.”
“ What? ”
“Yeah, a hippopotamus. Where you do something but get mad at other people for doing it.”
“A fucking hypocrite? ”
“Shut up, you knew what I meant.”
“No, I didn’t. A hippo is an animal, idiot.”
Shouyou thinks that maybe being friends with Kageyama wouldn’t be so bad.