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Interrogation rooms were awfully boring.
Well, in Piltover, anyways. The ones in Zaun were full of all sorts of chems they could pump you full of until you couldn't tell truth from lie from vomit. The ones in Demacia depended on how they were feeling: one day, you'd be sat at a cozy desk with a nice bottle of wine and the cutest interrogator you'd seen, and the other, you'd be chugging petricite while a giant gorilla of a knight screamed spittle all over your face.
In the one Jinx was currently sitting in, it was an empty, almost liminal little box with white walls and a really uncomfortable metal chair. There was a one-way window, and her hands and feet were cuffed to the table, and there was an itch on her butt that really needed a scratching, but she couldn't quite reach there without dislocating her shoulder and, worse, getting someone really annoyed.
Probably her wife. She really didn't want to annoy her wife.
It'd been fifteen minutes, twelve seconds, and point-oh-three milliseconds before the door finally opened and Hat Lady walked in, folder in hand. Jinx figured Fat Hands wouldn't have the guts to interrogate little baby Powder directly, even though she'd been the one to finally land a punch in her stomach and immediately ship her to the clink. Instead, her pink-haired blood relation was probably sobbing behind that one-way window to the left. She could practically hear the snot running from Vi's broken-looking nose. Wuss.
"After all these years, we've finally caught you," Hat Lady's accent didn't grate as much these days, especially after all the snobs she'd had to bump shoulders with at all those royal galas, but it still put Jinx on edge, "I sometimes wonder if this is a dream and I'll wake up soon."
"Psh, you know you loved the chase. All those wonderful games of tag and hide-and-seek…"
"Because, of course, this was all just a game to you." Wow. A little bitter there, Hat Lady. "No longer. We've won, Jinx. There's nothing left for you to do but play along and maybe avoid having the jury kill you themselves."
"Honestly, that sounds way more fun! I'll even defend myself if I can get that experience. Imagine it. 'Objection!' — BAM! Bullet in the head."
Jinx laughed at that particular image in her brain. Knowing Pilties, the entire jury would probably come with their own guns, too. And a kangaroo. Get it? Because it'd be a kangaroo court? She chuckled a little at that one. Flashlight would probably groan if she were here, like she always did.
Hat Lady wasn't nearly as amused, because she was a prude. She tossed the folder onto the table before steepling her fingers.
"I'll remind you of your rights again, if only because this will be recorded. I'm fully aware you won't be listening to a bloody thing I say," Hat Lady grumbled, before droning on, "You have the right to remain silent during this interrogation. Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law…"
"Attorney, you'll get me an attorney, I have the right to shut my trap without one, blah blah blah," Jinx mocked, even doing a purposefully-awful impression of Hat Lady, "I understand my rights and I'm still willing to sit down and chat. Happy?"
"As can be." Again, cold as ice. "I shall now begin the interrogation of Jinx as required by…"
Jinx's eyes flickered to the folder with her name on it. Nice and fat, stuffed chock-full of information. Most of it dog-eared, all of it unorganized, to the point where she's pretty sure nobody's actually looked at it for years now. Knowing Fat Hands, she's probably just shoved hundreds of reports in there while cramming a donut down her throat. But one thing did catch her eye…
…labeled on top of about ten dozen other near-identical labels was the Last Updated information. Timestamped with this week, and the Demacian ambassador's approval as the listed informant.
Checkmate.
"You're not doing it right."
"...I'm sorry?" Hat Lady quirked an eyebrow.
"You have to address me by my full name and titles. I mean, this is your moment of glory, you gotta do it properly, right? I didn't know you were someone to write off the details just because you didn't get your morning cuppa tea or something."
"Jinx, I'm sure we're far past the formalities," the sheriff narrowed her eyes, before Jinx cut her off with a name that made the peanut gallery go quiet. The noise in Jinx's head silenced itself, as well, leaving only a solemn silence.
"Officer Kiramman." Jinx said with all the force of an orator, straightening her back, "...I suppose you're right. We're past formalities. Caitlyn." Now, at that, the Sheriff of Piltover froze in her seat. "Please address me properly for this interrogation."
Jinx's rictus grin returned, but there was a dangerous shine in her Shimmer eyes.
"By my full name and titles, pretty please."
Steady sniper hands slowly opened the folder as Caitlyn's lips pressed into a line, no doubt with a million thoughts in her head. Oh, how the tables turned.
"Very well. I shall begin the interrogation of… of Jinx Crownguard of Zaun," Caitlyn double-checked the file, eyes widening in disbelief, "Knighted as the Roar, Sword-Captain of the Clouded Vanguard, Former Sentinel of Light, Elected Vice-Mayor of the Mage Sanctuaries…?"
"And a bunch of other titles that aren't legal but are still valid," Jinx waved off, like this wasn't a big deal, like there weren't years upon years of espionage and secrecy and valor and rebirth leading up to this punchline, "Cannon of Demacia, Dragonbane, loving wife, secret agent, absolute grandmaster of tricking Piltover's Finest Losers, and, oh!"
Jinx leaned forward with the biggest grin on her face.
"Diplomatically immune."
"I — This is doctored, it can't be — Crownguard …?" Caitlyn looked over the first page again, and again, and again, until she got the wherewithal to actually look at the second page. And if it was possible, her face got even paler. If Jinx remembered the game plan correctly, that one actually listed her family relations. Well, to be specific: her newer family relations.
Dropping the fattened file folder like a hot coal, Caitlyn cursed under her breath, bent down, and sloppily tried to shove the papers back into the worn-down manila folder. The sniper's fingers were more unsteady than they had ever been in her hoity-toity hat-loving life.
Now gripping the once-forgotten dossier like it was the most important thing in the world, Caitlyn looked at it, then at Jinx (who was still sporting the most glorious smile, by the way), then, running off of pure survival instinct, bowed mildly like an Ionian to Jinx.
"Excuse me."
And proceeded to dart out of the interrogation room, slamming the door behind her.
Jinx, for her part, enjoyed a full, gut-punching, belly-aching laughter for a solid five minutes, pink tears coming out of her eyes as her sides went into orbit.
"...Which would make you my sister-in-law, yes. Speaking of."
"Violet, we've been breached. Thoroughly and repugnantly! We need to check all of our files for veracity yesterday , and oh, gods, the Demacian embassy… Vi?"
Rounding the last corner before she got to the other side of the one-way window, Caitlyn damn near dropped Jinx's folder again when she saw exactly who was speaking to Vi before she got there.
Garen Crownguard, Sword-Captain of the Dauntless Vanguard, nephew of High Marshall Tianna Vanguard and heir to Demacia's most prestigious protectorate family, was currently seated across from her wife, who seemed just as thoroughly shaken as Caitlyn herself. In fact, the pink-haired woman couldn't muster the strength to stand.
Clearing his throat, the soldier stood at full height, two heads above Caitlyn, and offered a hand to shake. It was grounding, somehow. About the only thing that made sense in the last hellish minute. Squaring her shoulders, Caitlyn met him in the eyes and gave him a firm handshake, trying to shake off her nerves as much as possible.
"...Lord Crownguard. I'm sorry to inform you, but there's been a breach in the Demacian embassy, so any military matters will need to be tabled until —"
"Hah! I'm not here in my capacity as military leader, I assure you. Rather, I'll be acting in my legal power as Sword-Captain for my comrade past the window, at least until the family attorney can be shipped over."
"Lord Crownguard?" Caitlyn faltered, her hand slipping from his, "Wh-What do you mean?"
"Jinx is my sister-in-law." The captain simply stated. "Which makes Vi also my sister-in-law, which makes you also my sister-in-law. All family, simply put. So please," he smiled, "call me Garen."
It's all true.
Gods-be-damned, it was all true.
Every last word in Jinx's newly-updated dossier, every last name , all of it was easily traceable to verifiable origins. With the Crownguards' permission, Demacia was able to send over official government documentation within hours, through messenger bird and Hexgate, enough to actually legitimize Jinx's claim to one of the most prestigious families on Valoran.
Knighted as the Roar after three tours with the Dauntless Guard, the first being impromptu.
Founded the Clouded Vanguard before being titled Sword-Captain of said Vanguard after an entire month of Jinx-level pranking managed to impress the High Marshall herself.
Briefly joined the Sentinels of Light during the Ruination.
And for Vice-Mayor of the Mage Sanctuaries…
"Sheriff Caitlyn Kiramman,
Thank you for your prompt and prudent request for further information regarding the identity of Lady Jinx Crownguard.
If you touch a single blue hair on my wife's head, I'll find you and kill you.
— Lady Luxanna Crownguard, Radiant, Mageseeker Leader, Mayor of the Mage Sanctuaries"
Lady Lux had a beautiful, swooping signature that bled from the informal cover letter onto the next few pages of documentation it was under.
Not to mention Lord Crownguard… Garen. Caitlyn was familiar enough with him in passing to know he was more than some sword-sweeping lunkhead. Watching him in action, practically dictating that Jinx was to be placed under house arrest in the Demacian embassy building was enough to sway even her convictions.
Mind still reeling from today's revelations, Caitlyn slowly crawled into bed next to Vi. Her wife had been poring over every last word in the folder for hours, and apparently even brought a copy back home, given it was all over her nightstand and some of the floor.
"Usually, it's me who's not following the no-work-at-home rule," Caitlyn sighed, before placing a hand on Vi's thigh and facing her, "talk to me, Violet?"
"...She's a hero," Vi said sullenly, eyes on the page but no longer reading, "The list of things she's done for Demacia, the people she's saved. Obviously, the Clouded Vanguard… It's a black ops division, but it's not like we're above that. I… the buildings. Every major corporation she's blown up or sabotaged, they were —"
"Part of the Noxian war machine or otherwise illegal under Piltovan neutrality policy, I know," Caitlyn ground out, feeling her shoulders slump, "and anything else she destroyed will be labeled as necessary collateral to maintain her public image. She'll be freed with a slap on the wrist unless we want to risk war with Demacia."
"And Zaun," Vi snorted, tossing her papers onto the nightstand with the rest of the pile, "because she's also the reason the Demacian army has chemtech battalions now. Of course."
"And you? What are your feelings?"
Violet went silent, her eyes staring up into the ceiling. Under the dim light of Vi's lamp, Caitlyn could see her wife's eyes glazing over with grief. She couldn't imagine the emotions churning within. Gods knew Caitlyn's own heart could barely take it. Killer of Silco, murderer of the council and her mother — now redeemed Demacian champion of progress.
"I should be happy for her. Janna's tits, she got a family, a wife, made a name for herself, did good despite all the sumpshit in the past. Despite Silco. But it's…" Vi shuddered, "all these years of Jinx telling me to let go of Powder, it never got to my head. But now that she's suddenly this fairytale knight, this hero of the people… I know Powder's dead."
Vi turned her head to look at Caitlyn, guilt and sorrow now openly running down her face.
"That's so fucked up , Cupcake. I'm so… so…"
Violet broke down into Gutlau mutterings and curses, and Caitlyn could do nothing but hold her wife in her arms and shoulder her tears until they both fell asleep.
The following week was a diplomatic nightmare.
With one of their best agents outed after an extended sabotage mission, Caitlyn thought that Demacia would do the smart thing and withdraw Jinx with nary a whisper. If she was lucky, they'd ship her off to Targon, or the Shadow Isles, or whatever wasteland far away from Piltover and Zaun. Caitlyn could scoff about good riddance and Vi could latch onto an idealized memory of her sister, and all would be well.
Unfortunately, Demacia was honorable and, worse, eager. In order to make amends for their blue-haired heroine's damages and bargain for said heroine's pardoning, the Crown decided to send over a hand-picked number of diplomats and relief teams to sweeten the deal for the Council and reestablish good relations between the two nations.
Translation: Jarvan IV saw the opportunity to flex his power and lord over the fact that the Loose Cannon was a weapon in his arsenal.
Crass, but wholly effective. The Council effectively had their tail between their legs, especially those who knew the fate of the old Council. If a Jinx backed by Silco's rebellion could wreak havoc on two nations, and an independent Jinx could demolish Piltover's spires for years without repercussion, what about a Jinx in Demacian pockets? A Jinx with an army? And that was only the cherry on top, because an all-out war with the strongest nation on the continent would be… well.
Caitlyn noted her tea tasted especially bitter this week.
After she and her wife had calmed down enough to stop pissing themselves, Garen offered to let Vi meet her extended family, so to speak, and learn of how it all happened over lunch, the afternoon before their first Council appearance. Jinx even agreed.
Caitlyn was allowed to be there, despite Jinx's initial objections. It was the only piece of satisfaction she was allowed on that day: promise of the true story, beyond the numbers, the titles, the statistics.
While Caitlyn was morbidly curious, Vi was sweating like a freshly-badged cadet.
"What if they don't like me?" Vi shuddered, on their way to the Hexgate station. They had donned their Enforcer dress uniforms for the day, and Vi was smoothing out every last crease on her coat. "Oh, gods, do I have to give the shotgun talk to Jinx's wife? They're already married! And — we should have invited Ekko! Why didn't we invite Ekko?!"
"Because, apparently, he'd already met the lucky lady." Caitlyn grumbled, straightening her hat.
"Right. Right. Sorry, cupcake, I just…"
"Vi."
Caitlyn's hand held Vi's, her thumb smoothing over her wife's hardened knuckles. Although everything about Jinx left an awful taste in her mouth, she was still Vi's sister. Caitlyn hardened her heart and decided that if anything, she would stomach it all for her.
"My love, please. Your sister came back to you. Under a different name, a different nation… a different family, yes. But I won't let you fumble a miracle just because you're nervous. So please, take a deep breath."
The toughest Enforcer in Piltover took a shuddering breath, trying to calm her pounding heart. Caitlyn could still see the last of Vi's nerves fraying, but when warm lips descended upon her own, she could feel Vi's relief.
"Thanks, babe. You're the best."
"Blegh."
The high-pitched sound of disgust pulled them out of their private world, and Caitlyn's lips parted in surprise as she saw what Jinx was wearing.
Gone were the rags of pink and purple, the bandoliers of bullets and the mismatched stockings. There wasn't a trace of Zaunite magenta left on Jinx's body, except for the Shimmer in her eyes.
Instead, Demacian white silk was tailored to her thin body. A royal blue corset, shining pauldrons, golds and blacks, a tie and cufflinks… there were still traces of the unhinged, with mismatching leather gloves, and an assortment of sharp belts that didn't need to be there. But most notable were her weapons.
She still had her triad of missile launcher, minigun, and handgun, but they were entirely different models from her "Fishbones", "Pow-Pow", and "Zapper" creations. Rather than modified versions of stolen prototype armaments, they were clearly commissioned from Laurent blacksmiths, if Caitlyn knew anything about weapon manufacturer signatures. Coated in a defensive layer of stark white petricite, with accents of gold…
And, if she wasn't mistaken, the Hextech core of her rocket launcher was replaced with a relic-stone from the Blessed Isles.
"Pow — er, Jinx!" Vi cleared her throat, before looking her sister up and down, "They got you all gussied up for the meeting too, huh?"
"Yeah, yeah, take a picture, it'll last longer," Jinx groused, pulling at the collar of her dress uniform, "I'm burning this stupid tie the moment I'm back in the Great City."
"I can refer you to my own tailor, if it's uncomfortable," Garen laughed, lumbering in behind her in his own full regalia, "Although, I doubt we'll be the same size."
"I want a new tie, not a flag around my neck, thanks." The mad bomber snorted, before making a face. "You look dumb with your hair slicked back by the way, Fat Hands."
"Ugh, I knew it," Vi groaned, reaching up and messing up her hair again.
All-in-all, the scene was disturbingly domestic as they walked to go meet the Demacian attaché. Surrounded by half a dozen Enforcers for more appearance's sake than anything, with Jinx not in handcuffs… Caitlyn was pointedly ignoring the stares in their direction, from both the hapless Piltoven citizenry and the Zaunites lurking in the alleyways, curious on who domesticated their most infamous daughter.
Finally, they stood in front of the boarding stairs of the airship. Caitlyn squared her shoulders and Vi took another deep breath. Garen's feet were planted in place, his posture denoting years of military training.
Jinx, on the other hand, sauntered forward in front of everyone, a thousand-watt smile on her face. Then, she opened her waiting arms, to the Piltovan company's confusion.
And then a blonde blur leapt from the still-lowering stairs and into Jinx's embrace. The cameras begun flashing as the paparazzi pounced on the obvious headliner photo, but Caitlyn had a feeling that Jinx would likely frame it on her wall.
"Hey, Flashlight," Jinx said, before landing a theatrical, open-mouth kiss on Lady Luxanna Crownguard, leader of the reformed Mageseekers, "looks like you found me again."
"And here I thought I'd have to break you out of jail, kill everyone in the precinct, and burn Piltover to the ground," Luxanna giggled, and oh, Caitlyn understood everything now, "but thankfully it didn't have to come to that."
"How's Bilawa? And the rest of the Sanctuaries for that matter?"
"Everyone's doing fine, and if they're not, Poppy and Shyvana volunteered to straighten things out. Sylas is still nowhere to be found, so I figured I could afford to make the trip."
"It's been how many months, and the first thing you do is mention your ex?"
"Jinx!" Luxanna play-admonished, before planting another kiss on her wife's cheek. Caitlyn had a stray thought — was this how everyone saw herself and Vi?
Before she could explore that tangent, Luxanna let go of her wife and let her body relax into a more regal stance. Where before stood Jinx's Flashlight, now stood Lady Luxanna Crownguard, Demacia's figurehead representative for the case of Jinx Crownguard. As rehearsed, Caitlyn shook hands with the Radiant, finding her grip firm and warm. Again, the cameras flashed.
"Sheriff Kiramman, a pleasure doing business with you. Thank you for agreeing to meet with us. Demacia thanks you for your service."
"Piltover welcomes you with open arms, Lady Crownguard. I hope our talks can be fruitful for both our nations."
And, hopefully, leaves Caitlyn with less migraines.
Garen was highly amused by his tablemates at lunchtime.
Vi reminded him of his younger self, so eager to please and yet unversed in any form of communication other than his fists. Lux and Caitlyn were playing their version of political tennis, niceties being thrown back and forth. He couldn't speak for Caitlyn, but he knew that Lux was holding herself back from ripping into Jinx's absentee sister.
And Jinx? After years of dealing with Jinx's antics, it was cathartic to finally see her squirm under pressure. Under her caustic jokes and her sidelong cooing to his sister, Garen could tell she was nervous. Disarming bombs was a cakewalk for her. Disarming the tension between her wife, her archnemesis, and her sister-turned-archnemesis?
Garen would have to thoroughly pamper Katarina the next time he saw her. Their star-crossed love seemed rather simple, compared to this.
Delicately cutting into the beef wellington he had ordered for his lunch, Garen savored the meat as he watched Jinx try to make light of the literal war crimes she had committed in her youth. It was like watching a ballerina pirouette into a Noxian land mine.
"I swear, Singed isn't that bad of a guy! I mean, once you speak his language…"
"I will leave my opinion of his 'language' away from the table, but please remember I am an Ionian by blood."
"Er, what Caitlyn means to say is…"
"I'm sure Caitlyn can speak for herself on this matter. I'd like to keep our discussion on Demacia's chemtech suppliers strictly professional, if you don't mind. "
Garen savored the red wine before putting the glass down gently. Alright, alright. He'd had his fun. It wouldn't do to have his sister tried for the murder of Piltover's Finest, especially since the murder weapon would be awfully easy to recognize.
"Lux," he said slowly, putting a hand on her whitening knuckles gripping her steak knife, "Perhaps we should move on from this topic. Caitlyn, I did promise to regale you with how Jinx entered our ranks, did I not?"
Lux cleared her throat and backed down with a simple "of course", before using her steak knife for its intended purpose. Jinx let out a breath she didn't know she was holding, and the two Enforcers had their attention snapped to him, ever vigilant in following a lead.
Say what you will about his deafening patriotism on the battlefield, Garen was quite proud of his more subtle charisma. With a grin, Garen relaxed in his seat.
"Feel free to correct me where it matters, Jinx. Now, it was during the Dauntless Vanguard's tour across the southern Noxian coast. We met in Holdrum…"
Once more, dirt, blood, and smoke were the only things Garen could taste. Damn it all, they knew. The Noxians knew where the Dauntless Vanguard would be, and it seemed that today was the day the High General saw fit to snuff out Demacia's most elite forces.
They'd managed to help evacuate the civilians in this sector, thank Targon, but escaping the city would be far from bloodless. As they'd feared, Lord Brannin of the Sea was nothing but a mere puppet for Noxus now, and Garen now had the task of fighting his way out of the port city's walls and back into the safety of Demacia's naval blockade.
Easier said than done, when the city's front gates admitted in a Citybreaker chock full of Trifarian legionnaires.
It would be urban warfare of the worst kind, but Garen at least had a plan. The west gate could be jammed open if he could cut a path there and overtake the portcullis, if only for a few minutes. From there, the Dauntless would have to funnel their strength in a grueling push to escape the Noxian lines.
He knew it was a self-inflicted suicide mission with these many Trifarians, but he couldn't afford to take any other soldiers with him lest Darius's bastards converge on the portcullis even faster. He needed to get his men out, at all costs.
"Mother, Father, Lux... Aunt Tianna, Jarvan, please pray for me," Garen whispered solemnly under his breath, looking for an opening in his path, "Kayle, guide my sword…"
Just as he was about to sprint into the jaws of death, a streak of smoke and Hextech light soared across the skyline, and a great explosion suddenly fractured the west gate. The sound was unbelievable, as though stone shattered like glass. It was more than a boom… it was a Roar, as it would later be known throughout the Vanguard.
As the foundations crumbled, Garen tracked the missile's path to its origin, where a blue-haired girl stood on a rooftop, weapon in hand. A Piltovan? No, from their undercity-turned-state. Everything about the girl was makeshift, from her pants to her weapons. The tattoos on her body confirmed she was a child of the so-called nation of Zaun, or so he vaguely remembered in his shocked reverie.
Frantically, the girl motioned for him to get a move-on, snapping him out of his confusion. For now, an enemy of an enemy was a friend. Nodding to her, Garen ran back to his company, no longer planning a one-man takeover of the portcullis. The rest of the Vanguard were, themselves, flabbergasted by the sudden opening, and so Garen snapped them out of it.
"Men! It seems Zaun's come to the rescue, and I'll be damned if I complain! Make way for the broken wall! Galio formation! For Demaciaaaaa!"
As they charged, Garen looked back, and saw the girl leaping across the rooftops, Noxian forces on her tail just as much as they were on his. Making eye contact with the stranger once more, Garen signaled for her to follow along. To come with him and his own.
After a moment's hesitation, she nodded back.
"After the tea party, I had nowhere to go." Jinx admitted, spinning her fork in her fingers before digging into her lunch-dessert. A chocolate cake, as it were. "I killed Silco. Zaun would have been a living hell. And Piltover… psh."
She laughed humorlessly.
"So I stowed away on a boat going west, taking whatever I could with me and stealing what I couldn't. It landed in Holdrum, and I got my bearings there. When Noxus came-a-knockin', I didn't feel like staying."
"We didn't lose a single soldier in our retreat. Many, including myself, owe Jinx our lives."
"Aw, c'mon, it was nothing." Jinx savored her cake. "Don't get all sappy on me, Gare-Bear."
"So, I presume from there, Jinx served on several of the Dauntless Vanguard's tours, providing her own flavor of… battlefield effectiveness. Hence the litany of frontline victories in her dossier, and her eventual knighthood." Caitlyn stated diplomatically, mixing her tea. "That still doesn't explain her three other titles. Like how she earned her own Vanguard."
"Oh, I hate telling this part of the story." Jinx rolled her eyes. "Gare-Bear, Flashlight, feel free, or else I'll go on a rant about Uncle Eldred again."
"I can handle this one," Luxanna volunteered.
"Your forces are outdated. "
The Demacian Council arched their eyebrows at the sheer audacity on display. Lord Eldred of the Mageseekers and High Marshall Tianna especially seemed affronted by the gangly scowling Zaunite marching into their halls and demeaning their soldiers. After four weeks of publicly defacing every last bastion of Demacian pride, at that.
Lux, for her own part, tried her hardest to hold back a smile as her fianceé did what she did best.
"How dare you, sump rat —"
King Jarvan Lightguard III cleared his throat, immediately silencing Mageseeker Hesbeth, even as the cruel-faced researcher continued to scowl at Jinx. She scowled right back, before facing the King once more.
"Our honored knight is allowed opinions, especially if asked for them. It is crucial to Demacia that we understand our capabilities from all perspectives." Jarvan III leaned forward, a critical eye on the Zaunite. "Care to elaborate, Captain Jinx?"
"Of course, your Majesty. To be clear, your numbers are fine, if you wanna just throw bodies at people and hope it sticks," Jinx drawled, before tossing out several documents, both modern blueprints and ancient parchments, onto the table in front of her, "But weapons and battle plans are another story."
The shock on everyone's faces was quite pleasing, especially when they realized the documents were detailed blueprints of the main estates of every major clan, as well as every major military building within the Great City. Blueprints that Jinx absolutely should not have, given they were either well-guarded within the estates themselves or were otherwise classified government secrets.
"Thirteen Hextech Gemstones, about four-dozen quarry charges, and a big enough distraction are all I would need to send your beloved capital crumbling into dust," Jinx explained, overlaying a clear film with markings over each blueprint, denoting where these explosives would be placed, as well as where her entrance and escape routes would be, "and that's me highballing it."
From there, Jinx launched into a thirty-minute long lecture — abridged, Jinx corrected Lux later, since she had to omit a lot of important details for the sake of brevity — about unguarded entry points into the Great City, the various weaknesses of petricite and Demacian steel to both chemtech and Hextech, and how the current Mageseekers were a complete waste of time, money, and most importantly, firepower.
Seeing Lord Eldred and Mageseeker Hesbeth silently grow more and more vexed was like balm to Lux's soul, and she couldn't help but share a smirk with Garen in the middle of Jinx's "consultation". At first, Garen was pained to see so many flaws in his beloved Demacia's system, especially in its military. Despite this, Lux could see his heart steeling itself as Jinx hammered her point home, both Crownguard siblings standing stalwart at either side of Demacia's Roar.
"...And if you keep pretending there isn't an issue, if you keep yourself in the dark," Jinx spat out, placing a foot forward, as if daring any member of the Demacian Council to fight her on his, "then that's your loss. Not mine. It's their blood on your hands, not mine, it's your fault, not mine, if more of your people die because you can't be bothered to fix this. "
A silence rang across the Council. Several members seemed ill in their stomach. Others were fuming at Jinx still. Lux saw one of the Dawnspeakers holding onto a rosary, as if prayer to Kayle would give him the light of wisdom.
"Well." Lady Fiora Laurent said, cutting through the silence. "Our weaknesses have been unveiled, and we now see our flaws for what they are. For that, Knight Jinx, je vous applaudir. "
"...Er, thanks. Lady Laurent." Jinx hesitated, then bowed. Lux would bet money that Jinx expected a more antagonistic reaction.
"I believe Knight Jinx's presumptions are too radical to hold any sway in our military strategy." Lord Eldred said, his upper lip stiff. "Demacia has stood proudly without such extremist changes to its structure. And to relax our policy towards mages is an insult unto itself."
"I'm sorry, are we going to skim over her theft of classified documents?" Lady Fortis scowled. "I should think that she should be stripped of her knighthood with this stunt!"
"Lady Fortis, please, some decorum." Lady Lestara Buvelle stated. "If you wish to press charges, feel free, but Knight Jinx's title rests in the hands of his Majesty alone. In any case, I believe Knight Jinx proved her point in spades."
"The secrets of Demacia —" Lady Fortis began.
"As if hoarding the Darkin Aegis is a secret —" Lord Durand shot back.
Seneschal Xin Zhao's spear slammed into the ground like a mighty gavel, causing a reverberating echo that silenced everyone. It indicated only one thing: the Crown had come to a decision. Lux swallowed some nervousness as she awaited his Majesty's verdict on the matter.
"Thank you, my boy," King Jarvan III nodded to the former Ionian, "Now. It has become starkly obvious that Demacia's army is no perfect creation. Indeed, not many things are. But in the same breath, it must be known that this nation prides itself on tradition, and the strength of its tradition. Such changes would need to scrutinized before we embrace them. To that end, on a majority vote of the Demacian Council, with the High Marshall's vote counting thrice over, the following provisions shall be created…"
The promotion of Jinx to Sword-Captain. The creation of a new battalion, about half the size of a regular battalion, commanded and hand-picked by Sword-Captain Jinx. The assignment of the new battalion as a clandestine unit, incorporating magecraft, foreign weaponry, and espionage tactics as necessary. The continued supervision of the new battalion in order to assess the necessity and efficacy of nouveau battle stratagems…
In essence, Jinx would be commanding an covert operation battalion specifically to experiment with her "solutions" to the Demacian modus operandi, which was far more than Lux was expecting out of the meeting. The battalion would eventually become the Clouded Vanguard — and would last far longer than expected due to the sheer success it would see.
Before then, however, was the Council's vote.
"House Laurent votes towards," Lady Laurent said.
"The Mageseekers vote against," Lord Eldred stated, as cold as ever.
"Speaking as proxy for Lady Vayne, House Vayne votes against," an elderly man says, after consulting what seemed to be a reference manual penned by Vayne herself.
"The High Marshall votes towards."
At that, the entire Demacian Council looked at Aunt Tianna in surprise. A hint of unmasked anger rose in Lord Eldred's face as his own wife voted against him. Lux, herself, was taken aback by the sudden support of her aunt for Jinx — whom her aunt historically despised on a personal basis.
"House Crownguard also votes towards." Aunt Tianna concluded, her expression stern and unreadable.
From there, the rest of the votes folded like a house of cards.
"House Durand votes towards."
"House Buvelle votes towards."
"House Fortis," Lady Fortis's eyes flickered towards Aunt Tianna, before licking her lips nervously, "House Fortis abstains."
The head Dawnspeaker cleared his throat. "The Illuminators vote… towards."
"The Rangers vote towards."
"The Dragonguard votes towards…"
Jinx honestly had no clue what anyone was expecting out of this meeting. Oh, sure, both countries probably had to act all buddy-buddy and try to settle the score in a "civilized manner with regard to both the defendant's actions and the justifications in doing so". Barf. But cut the boring crap out, and it's really just Demacia pointing a gun at Piltover and throwing money at them before weaseling Jinx back into their big, pauldron-loving arms.
To her ever-lasting dismay, Jinx had to act sane for the most part. Which was awful, because whenever she had to act sane , it meant that she couldn't be all bombs and happiness and joy, it meant that she had to be all serious and dark on the outside, which made her feel all serious and dark on the inside. And that was just terrible.
At the very least, she could scare the shit out of these pansy-ass Pilties while doing it. And Lux and Garen would be there. So, y'know, it wasn't all bad.
"Jinx Crownguard will now be brought forward for testimony."
And that was her cue.
"Root for me, Chuck." She muttered to the Enforcer guard to her right, shooting him a suave smile before marching up to the podium, all business in her Demacian dress uniform, her pistol the only visible weapon on her body. …That they could find, anyways.
She could smell the fear oozing from every one of the Council bigwigs. Oh, yes, she knew who she was to these people. Jinx killed their predecessors in a big blue rocket of misery — there were probably more than a handful here who got the job because she went and disintegrated the old Council. Not to mention the havoc she'd unleashed as the Loose Cannon.
"Please state your name and occupation." Jayce said, the only guy here with the huevos to look her in the eyes.
"Lady Jinx Crownguard of Zaun, the Roar. Sword-Captain of the Clouded Vanguard." And a billion other titles that'll probably pop up sooner or later. Jinx gave them a feral grin, briefly. "At your service."
"Sword-Captain Crownguard," Garen began, using his this-is-official-business tone, "Do you swear on your heart and sword to speak the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, for Demacia?"
"I swear on my heart and sword," Jinx repeated, a bit more melodramatically than she should, pressing the flat of her pistol to her heart, "to speak the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth! For Demacia."
"Very good," Garen said, holding back a smirk, "The floor is yours, Councilor."
"Thank you, Sword-Captain Crownguard. We shall now read out the list of felonies that, ah, the Lady Sword-Captain Crownguard has been accused of."
Jinx holstered her pistol and kept a straight face as Talis spouted off just about every crime in Piltover's penal code and then some. Ten billion accounts of resisting arrest, a hundred kazillion accounts of destruction of property, an infinity gazillion accounts of disturbing the peace… She's impressed they kept track of the number of times she jaywalked. It was actually a relatively low number! Silco always did say to look both ways before crossing the street.
"...and numerous other criminal acts, omitted for the sake of brevity. As a reminder to the Council, this defense is to be submitted for the purposes of international diplomacy, and so will not be admissible for prosecution in any court under Piltover's jurisdiction without the Demacian government's consent. With that in mind, the floor will be given to the defendant for their preliminary statement."
Jinx cleared her throat and pulled out a bundle of notecards, reading from them in a dreadfully dull tone.
"Councilors of Piltover. Sheriffs Kiramman, and honorable Enforcers. I thank you all for your outstanding service. To the people of Piltover, upon reflection of the destruction seen as necessary to our righteous cause, I wish to extend Demacia's most sincere apologies, and… my…"
She sighed, half-growling. She couldn't read this stuff in any way that was believable. Jinx swore that whoever wrote this crap was screwing with her. Lux loved her too much to torture her like this. She bet it was Garen, that smug bastard. Or Senna trying to get a laugh out of her suffering — it did read like the Sentinel leader's personal brand of disingenuous kiss-ass.
Clearing her throat and dropping her stiff posture, Jinx stowed away the notecards. She did swear on her heart and sword, so she'd tell the whole truth, damn the consequences. For Demacia!
"...Well. I would apologize if there was something to be sorry about. Let me educate you councilors about myself: I was born and raised in an undercity that choked under Enforcer heels, and as you damn well know, I learned and acted under the guidance of the man that transformed that undercity into its own nation by any means necessary."
And just like that, the Council room went from bored to tense. An upgrade, in her opinion. Jinx could feel the Shimmer in her veins start pumping. She'd bet good gold that her eyes were glowing right about now.
"You know what I did. So does Demacia. Which is why after I swore an oath to king and realm, they figured it was the perfect alibi to go purge the rot in your beloved City of Progress without causing an all-out war. Fancy buildings and scorched paint jobs are pricey, sure. Hospital bills for Enforcers are also expensive, but given the fact that most of your police force is now made of automatons , lemme ask you this."
She leaned forward, eyes wide, as if telling a real big secret.
"Are they worth the sabotage of a Noxian ballista factory? Are they worth the destruction of General Swain's next trade-blockading dreadnought? Are they worth Demacian lives, the people fighting for the nation that took me in? How about the innocents whose towns are torn apart by the Citybreakers manufactured by Piltover's premier corporations? Shouldn't the answer be obvious? "
A full smile etched itself onto Jinx's face. It would be familiar to anyone who'd seen the wrong end of Pow-Pow.
"So for that, I'm not apologizing one bit. Genuinely, and I cannot believe I'm saying this… I did what I did for honor and justice. And isn't that the craziest thing? What a riot!"
Jinx laughed. And then laughed some more. And then laughed a little bit more. Wiping a tear from her eye, Jinx sighed blissfully and brightened up.
"Alright, that's my two bits."
The Council room then exploded into questions. For hours.
Jinx sighed. Well, it was fun while it lasted.
The Last Drop was about the last place Ekko expected Jinx to be tonight.
With her shirt partially unbuttoned and her tie forgotten in her embassy suite, Jinx looked more like a bushed-out businessman after a long day of overtime, rather than the wiry frame of explosions and mania that she actually was. She was a few drinks in, if he had to guess.
Figuring she could use some company, Ekko took the seat next to her, feeling underdressed compared to the latest celebrity on Piltover's news reels.
"All the way across the river for a drink?" He said in Gutlau, as the bartender poured his usual.
"Piltie booze ain't shit, little man, you know this." Jinx chuckled in their native language, before raising her glass to him. He clinked his own to hers and enjoyed his liquor. The burn felt like home. He wondered if she even tasted hers.
"Thought you'd be shacking up with your wife tonight."
"Nah. She's dead tired and there's more boring crap tomorrow, so fucking her would just be a bad time in the morning." Jinx grumbled, clearly annoyed by the fact. She sighed. "Figured I'd pay my respects while I had the time. …To everyone."
"Hey." Ekko said, keeping his attention on the wood grain of the bar. "I'm sure they'd appreciate it. All of them."
They both knew damn well what they were referring to. As much as Silco was a bastard who ruined everything, as much as Jinx had Firelight blood on her hands, they'd already broken each other's bones and cried over it years ago. She was allowed to visit graves. He wouldn't deny her that.
"...Do you think I abandoned you?" Jinx suddenly asked.
"What?" Ekko blinked at her.
"When I left. When I came back from fairytale land, begging you to keep your trap shut about Demacia and Lux and…"
Jinx trailed off. Not in the way that she would when the voices were overwhelming her, but in the way that she'd get too deep in the past. Ekko had thought about that question long and hard, himself. Life in Zaun was still hard. Everything was still a struggle. He could see how Jinx saw her way as the easy way out — running away after the shitstorm she caused, to green pastures and blue skies.
"No." Ekko said, surprising himself. "At least, not at that point."
Jinx looked up from her drink, at him. Ekko sipped his own before continuing his train of thought.
"You fucked everything up. Let's get that straight. You and Silco. And I hated the both of you for that. I still hate Silco, that bastard."
"Making me feel real good." Jinx grumbled.
"Let me get there. So you fucked up. Then you ran, because, hell, I'd have killed you myself back then, and I know Sevika wanted your head on a platter. Then you go and sign up to fight in a foreign army that only has swords and shields — and I can't imagine your crazy trencher ass having a good time doing that — and you claw your way into maybe being a good person."
"Chop chop, little man."
"The point I'm trying to make," Ekko said, tapping his finger on the table, "is that you abandoned me — us — when good people died in your crosshairs. When you fucked up. That's when I felt it."
"...Oh." Jinx scowled, her attention on the bar's wood grain, now.
"But you came back. You got out, you changed, and the first thing you did when Demacia shipped you back on your top secret mission is get your ass whooped by me and then apologize. "
Jinx squinted. "That's not how I remember that fight going," she hummed, even though that is absolutely how that fight went, and Ekko won't hear otherwise, "But go on."
"So, in short… Yes. You abandoned Zaun, once. But you came back, made the effort to give something back, and gave the Pilties hell while doing it. So I think you're still one of Zaun's."
"Yeah, but how can you be so sure? I mean, look at me!" Jinx yelped, pointing at her obviously-Demacian clothes. If it weren't Jinx, Ekko was certain someone would have tried mugging her or picking her pocket. "Feels like I'm doing my old man a disservice, coming back with this costume."
"As much of a piece of shit Silco was," Ekko sighed, "He was your dad. And if he was a good dad, he would be happy seeing you be happy, whether you're here or wherever on Runeterra."
There was a bit of glassiness in Jinx's eyes. Maybe it was a trick of the light. He cleared his throat.
"I guess the point I'm trying to make is — we're not scuttlecrabs in a bucket. Zaun's in your blood. Literally. And…"
Ekko grinned, just like when they were kids.
"I mean, shit, you're Lady Jinx Crownguard of Zaun , aren't you? It'll be on your shiny Demacian tombstone. Own it."
The wind was suddenly knocked out of his lungs as Jinx lunged for a bear hug. Ekko reeled back in shock, before awkwardly embracing his friend in return, patting her back.
"Thanks, Ekko."
She pulled away. Like magic, Jinx was back to her usual bubbly self, her manic grin still the same as always despite her hoity-toity outfit. Tossing some cash on the table, Jinx cracked her knuckles, hopping off her barstool.
"Keep the change, Chuck! Alright, c'mon. I need me some Jericho's after that shitfest of a meeting."
"Yeah, yeah. You still know how to ride sidealong on a hoverboard?"
"Duh! I've still got half a brain, little man!"
It was a week into the Piltover-Demacia diplomatic meetings that things came to a head for the two sisters.
Well, that was putting it nicely. If she were being more honest with herself, Vi was getting sick of watching the Council bend over backwards for Jinx. The same people who raked Vi and Caitlyn over the coals usually, for context. Not only that, but Jinx's overall attitude started to grate on Vi's nerves. She was bad enough when she was blowing up buildings every other week, but constant conversation?
Yeah, no, it absolutely had to end in a fistfight.
Which it did. Over some stupid argument that Vi didn't even remember the origin of, which escalated into some deep, bottled-up feelings escaping both their brains and exiting out in thoughtless word vomit, culminating in:
"And whose fault is it that they're all dead, huh?!"
Some part of Vi knew she deserved to get her nose punched in, her blood now staining Jinx's white glove. Another part of Vi moved sheerly on instinct, yanking the blue-haired bitch with her into the waters of the River Pilt. Both their nice uniforms were weighing them down terribly as they got sopping wet, throwing punches while wading in waist-deep water, but that thought was secondary to sinking a right hook into Jinx's stomach.
Jinx doubled over with a wheeze. Vi followed up with a fist to her face, painting a gnarly black eye on Jinx. Grabbing Jinx by the collar, Vi prepared to pummel her face in again, before Jinx yelled something Vi hadn't heard from her before.
"What do you want from this, Fat Hands?! Have you ever asked yourself why you're beating the shit out of me?!"
The answer came without thinking, and Vi tensed up to ready her punch again.
"I want Powder back, damn it! I want Vander back, and —"
"And what?! How are you gonna make that happen?"
"I…"
And there, right there, it just then hit Vi exactly what she was doing. Her fist unballed itself, and her arm went limp, but her grip on Jinx's collar didn't let up. A searing anger still burned deep in her heart, screaming at her to do something about this. To fix it.
"Are ya… gonna beat Powder out of me? Is that it? That how that works?"
"Maybe! I don't…" Vi growled. "Who the hell is Jinx Crownguard, anyways? I just know Powder, or Jinx — not you! How are you even remotely my sister?!"
"I… I don't know what you want anymore, Vi." Not Fat Hands. Vi. Gods, Jinx looked so tired for once. Like she'd been drained of all her manic energy. "You say I'm a jinx, so I become her. Then you say I'm Powder, but Powder's dead , but I try to be good like her. But now what?"
Jinx gestured at themselves, glaring at Vi despite her black eye. Her arms waved aimlessly at the Pilt they're wading in, at the bruises on both their bodies, the blood on their knuckles.
"Do you want a sister or not? Vi, talk to me. Mylo and Claggor, they're not here anymore. Vander's not here. I can't ask them."
"You don't… You don't get to do that, Jinx," Vi says, something warm running down her face, "You can't just torture me like this and then say it was all a joke. At least when you were crazy, I thought that was it. That'd be where I fixed things when I finally caught you. That's what I thought for years!"
"...Ah." Jinx managed, before managing a laugh. "I'm still crazy, y'know! Less voices in my head — thank Sona Buvelle for that — but still crazy. It's not so bad."
"You're crazy and a liar , is what you are!" Vi said, her grip tightening on Jinx's collar again. "Why didn't you tell me?! We could have had something again! I could have…!"
"What, and lie to your wife every night for years?" Jinx snarled. "She deserves better than that."
Vi fell silent. Then, she let go of Jinx's collar, making a face.
"Since when did you care about Caitlyn's feelings?"
"I don't." Jinx snorted, wiping some blood away from her nose. "I have standards , Vi, weird as that sounds. I took the mission after I got married. You do the math."
Vi caught her breath, looking at Jinx strangely as she pieced together Jinx's logic. Jinx gestured vaguely at nothing.
"I couldn't hurt you like that, let alone make you choose between me and her. She completes you, Vi. And even if I did stay in Zaun, even if I was the crazy bomber that I made myself out to be, I wouldn't want to ruin that for you."
And just like that, it all made sense. Vi hung her head, wiping her eyes of her tears. When did she start crying?
"You… You can't just be good all of a sudden. I can't just hurt for nothing."
"It wasn't for nothing. You got a rich wife and a cushy job from it." Jinx barked out a laugh, before coughing river water out her lungs. "But I'm sorry. For what it's worth. I'm sorry I'm not a little girl anymore. I'm sorry I'm not only an insane anarchist."
"You made my life hell, Jinx," Vi looked her in the eyes, her own eyes bloodshot, "And I don't know if I'll ever forgive you for that."
"Yeah. I know."
Vi's busted lower lip trembled.
"Do you want to be my sister?" Violet suddenly asked in Gutlau, from somewhere in her soul she didn't know still existed. "Crownguard?"
Jinx leaned back a bit, bloody nose dripping down her lips, eyebrow raised. Then, she wiped the blood off her mouth.
"Don't see why not, Kiramman."
They waded out of the Pilt because goddamn it, it was cold and their clothes were getting drenched.
In the end, it had taken twenty days of negotiations for Piltover to accept the terms of Jinx's pardon and release to Demacia. Lux had gone over the Council's long list of demands thrice over, checking for particulars as she ought to do.
As it stood, the most egregious was that Jinx was exiled from Piltover: setting foot in the city would mean she'd be stripped of her titles and court-martialed under Demacian law. A bit of a disappointment, that one. The city was beautiful, and Lux always did want to see what it looked like with smoke billowing from its skyline.
"As if I'd ever want to come back to this place," Jinx had waved it off with a laugh, "If anyone wants to visit, I'm a Hexgate away."
Jinx's base of operations was still functional in Zaun, at least, and Piltover had no power to stop her — or any Demacian — from conducting business there. Visiting Ekko or Singed was about the last thing on Lux's mind, however.
"Whatcha lookin' at, Flashlight?"
Standing tall over Piltover's vast skyline was the looming Hexgate Tower, its magic providing a dim blue glow to the cloudy night. It was northwest of the Demacian embassy — beyond the horizon would be Demacia itself, leagues and leagues away. Lux clutched at her night robe as a cool breeze made her skin shiver.
"It's beautiful. The Hexgate, I mean. Raw magic, refined into the ability to cross oceans in the blink of an eye…"
"Really? I always thought it was a lil' dirty-looking. Like Jayce needed to compensate, y'know?"
Lux giggled as she nuzzled into her wife's side. The smell of ash and tonic reminded her of home, more than the petricite walls of the Great City ever could. Jinx planted a soft kiss against her jaw, and Lux wrapped an arm around her.
"I hope Bilawa's okay. I trust Shyvana and Poppy, but… the Mage Rebellion has been concerningly quiet. Hopefully once you're back, Sylas might be willing to discuss a ceasefire again."
"Once it hits winter in the Freljord, he'll come crawling back to me. We're both gutter filth, after all." Jinx stretched, leaning on the handrail. "Let's stop talking shop, though. The Mage Sanctuaries won't implode on themselves."
"And what would you like to do instead, hm?"
"How about a romantic moonlit walk?" Jinx smirked, before vaulting over the balcony.
"Hey, wait for me!" Lux, clad in nothing but a night robe and pajamas and comfy little slippers, leapt after her wife.
Lux fell in love for many reasons. At first, it was her own curiosity, when Garen brought home a dangerous, caustic wireframe of a woman, a stray the Dauntless Vanguard picked up. From Zaun, a new nation borne of the oppressed, the criminals, the dregs of society.
Curiosity made way to friendship, then affection, then idolization, as she realized that Knight Jinx of Zaun was everything Lux wished she was — fearless, revelrous in her destruction, unwilling to apologize for anything she ever did.
Idolization became devotion which became obsession, as the world turned upside down and Jinx was the only one there for her. They bled for each other in the face of the Mage Rebellion, they held each other as Lux fled the Mageseekers and hid amongst the Clouded Vanguard, they made love on the nights that it was the only thing they could cling onto.
After obsession… her wife was delightfully unpredictable and knew how to keep their relationship fresh, and that's all she'd tell the curious little grandmas asking about her love life.
(Because after obsession, it would be borderline illegal to confess what Jinx meant to her.)
Finally catching up, Lux pounced on Jinx, her hands grabbing at the well-worn undershirt that Jinx preferred to sleep in. The both of them tumbled against one of Piltover's many tiled rooftops, bodies wrestling on an unsuspecting office building. Once Lux pinned Jinx between her legs, straddling the bluenette, she caught her breath and laughed.
"Looks like it's my win."
"Aw, shucks. I had home-field advantage, too." Jinx play-whined, before Lux felt the electrifying pressure of Jinx's digits grazing up her legs, teasing at her night robe's sash.
Looking around, Lux realized that they'd ended up between two large air conditioning units, shielding them from the rest of the city's view. Coincidence? Unlikely. And yet, the thought of it all — the planning, the implications, the foresight — only sent Lux's soul soaring even higher, as she bit her lip and combed a hand through her wife's hair.
"Jinx," Lux purred, their noses touching as Jinx slipped a thumb under her sash, "make love to me?"
" Anything for you ," Jinx rumbled, before lips clashed and tongues writhed. And just like that, all her worries melted away as Lux learned what a Piltovan night sky tasted like.
Whatever the rumors were about Jayce Talis, Lux could assure just about anyone that Jinx Crownguard didn't need to compensate for anything.
It was surprisingly bittersweet, Caitlyn concluded.
A couple of Piltover's porters struggled to lift one of Jinx's many brightly-colored boxes full of junk, scrap metal, and highly confidential weapon pieces. Stumbling on the bridge up to the airship, they yelped as the weight was suddenly lifted from their arms — and then did a double-take as they saw who was helping them out.
"Hey," The living ooze known as Zac smiled amicably, while Blitzcrank lugged two equally-bulging packages on either shoulder into the airship behind him.
Caitlyn herself was eager to see all of Jinx's contraband out of her city, volunteering herself to oversee their disposal. Seeing the sheer volume of it — enough for Jinx to call in a few favors from some of Piltover and Zaun's biggest oddities, both metaphorical and literal, and for Vi to put on the Atlas Gauntlets — was another thing.
"And you promise me you'll take care of my babies, okay? Okay?!" Ziggs blubbered, the yordle's goggles nearly filling with tears. He seemed more emotional about parting with his homemade explosives rather than Jinx herself.
"Don't worry, I'll treat them like my own. Upon which they'll blow up."
The demolitionist yordle blew loudly into a handkerchief before waddling off. Jinx waved him off like a navy boy off to war, before the airship station speaker intoned that there was ten minutes remaining before all passengers had to be aboard.
"Ready to go, Jinx?" Lux asked, rolling her own carry-on behind her.
"Yup, got everything packed and ready to go!" Jinx looked behind herself, checking on her so-called luggage. One of Blitzcrank's hands shot out across the entire bridge, barely missed Vi (who, herself, was carrying a package), grabbed a box, and started dragging it towards the luggage cabin, eliciting the pink-haired officer's angry Gutlau lecturing. "Well, by the time we leave, anyways."
Caitlyn decided it was now or never — or at an incredibly awkward, indeterminate amount of time later. Now would be best.
"Jinx." She said, stepping up. "You were my greatest case, my worst enemy, and the one I could never put behind bars. And I still can't, I suppose. You were the start of my career, and I'm still fairly certain you will be the end of my career."
"Hat Lady," Jinx grinned, putting her hands on her hips, "Are you getting sentimental with me? Me? "
Caitlyn scowled, but maintained her composure. "I… I hope that the next time we meet, it will be as Demacian and Piltovan, rather than as bitter enemies."
Vi cleared her throat behind her, apparently done with helping Jinx pack.
"And as Zaunite and Piltovan, of course." Caitlyn corrected, before offering her a hand. "Until then, live well."
To Caitlyn's surprising relief, Jinx took her hand firmly. Her shake lacked the raw power of Garen's paws, or the cloying warmth of Lux's palm — it was cold, it was quick, and it was entirely too enthusiastic. It seemed fitting.
"You better make my sister happy, Cait." Jinx smirked. "And lemme know if you do a family reunion. I wanna trash your place properly."
"Duly noted," Caitlyn sighed. Well, you couldn't win them all.
The final horn sounded, and Jinx hugged her sister one last time before she bounced behind Garen and Lux onto the airship. It was jarring, knowing they were all siblings-in-law, but Caitlyn couldn't quite bring herself to hate the idea.
As the airship flew off towards the Hexgate, she could just barely hear the Loose Cannon one last time.
"Bye Fat Hands! Bye Hat Lady! Remind me to bring pictures of my kid next time!"
Silence.
"Excuse me?! Jinx? JINX!"