Chapter Text
“...What?” Zoro croaks, because that’s all he can manage.
Sanji is looking at him equal parts incredulous and fearful. And maybe another part annoyed.
"What do you mean what? I said who the hell are you!? And how'd you get in here?" Sanji bites, taking a couple steps away from him. Sanji glances down at the other man’s hands and the fear flares again.
Zoro realizes he's still holding both his swords. He doesn't know what's going on, but this…This isn't his cook, he thinks, and he probably looks a bit insane at the moment. He sheathes both his swords, gritting his teeth at the realization Wado didn't come with him.
"You…Don't know who I am?" Zoro asks, just to be sure.
"What the hell did I say!? No, I don't know who you are! What the fuck do you want!?"
Zoro doesn't even know where to start.
"Okay, look. I…" He looks around, taking in more of his surroundings, hoping getting his bearings will somehow help this. It doesn't.
They're in a small kitchen, yes, but it's gone past modern and looks just plain futuristic. It's not its own room, either, behind the kitchen counter the room opens up into a living room with a couch, a coffee table, a couple chairs, and a huge black screen mounted to the wall. Posters and shelves and decorations that mean nothing to Zoro are littered neatly throughout the space.
"...Where are we?" Zoro asks, apparently forgetting his promise to explain.
"That's it, I'm calling the fucking cops." Sanji says, in that strange hint of an accent Zoro can't place, pulling up the small screen he holds. It lights up and Sanji begins pressing on it, and things move and change, though it doesn't seem to have any buttons. Zoro wants to be entranced, but he realizes he should probably stop him before he gets locked up.
"Wait! Wait, just let me explain." He says, trying not to look frantic. And trying his damndest to be nice to the cook. Which he wasn't used to in the slightest.
Sanji just stares at him, apparently waiting for said explanation.
"Shit…What year is it, for you?" He says, eyes wide.
This is, apparently, not an acceptable dialogue choice. Sanji goes right back to his phone, placing three quickly paced taps-
Zoro snatches the phone from his hands with surprising reflexes, throwing it into the other room. Sanji gapes at him.
"What year is it, shit-cook!?"
"Wh- How do you know I'm a cook? Are you some kind of stalker?"
Zoro thinks he's going to explode. This version of Sanji is just as annoying as his own.
"Look, I’m from another world!” He spits out, feeling crazy as he says it. “A shitty devil fruit sent me here, and now I just need to find out what I'm dealing with. I know who you are, because in my universe, you're our cook, and we sail on the same ship. But I don't know what universe this is, so just shut up and tell me!" He finishes, huffing like a toddler.
"...Oh my god.” The cook breathes. “You're insane."
Zoro pinches the bridge of his nose, trying not to lose his temper and cut the other man in half. Shit, could the cook even fight in this universe?
"I'm not insane ." Zoro insists. "Look, I can prove it. Ask me something about yourself. If you're anything like the you in my world, I can probably give you a pretty accurate answer."
Sanji seems to consider this a moment.
"...Yea, no, I'm not humoring this. Get out of my way, or I'm gonna start yelling for help. And I will beat your ass myself if I have to. I'll have you know I take kickboxing lessons, and I’m pretty damn good."
Yep, it was definitely still the shitty cook.
Zoro decided if the other wasn't gonna ask, he would just have to start proving it himself. Even if it meant saying the other man's damn name, a privilege he's yet to ever give him.
"Your name is Sanji. Blackleg Sanji?"
The cook squints at this. "Uh…Yea, my name is Sanji. But my last name is Red."
…Huh. Okay. That's new.
"Oh, from your old man, right? Zeff?"
Sanji nods, though he looks more concerned. Zoro realizes he probably isn't helping the stalker angle.
"Fuck, I'm not a stalker, alright? Where I'm from, Zeff is-"
The former pirate turned one-legged owner of a floating restaurant in the middle of the sea.
Zoro could be pretty dense, at times, but he had a sense that this would just make him sound crazy again.
"Actually, nevermind. Just…I just need you to trust me, okay?" Zoro says, and he feels too much like he's begging the cook, which makes his skin crawl. But it's all he can do at the moment.
"How do you…almost know my name?"
"Because, like I said, I came from another universe where I knew you. Your name is Blackleg Sanji there. I'm here because of a stupid Devil Fruit-"
"What the hell is a Devil Fruit?"
Zoro suddenly realizes what deep shit he's in.
Wait. The Devil Fruit. He made Sanji the anchor or whatever, right? Because he touched him, he got taken here? So if he just touched him again-
Zoro is suddenly reaching out, grabbing Sanji’s arms in his hands. The man recoils, cursing something under his breath in a language Zoro doesn’t know. He struggles for a second, two.
Nothing’s happening.
“Let me GO , freak!”
Zoro relinquishes his hold on him, not even watching as the other steps a few more feet back, looking ready to kick his head in.
"Aw, fuck." He groans, leaning against the fridge behind him, hand on his head.
“What was that about?” Sanji demands, still halfway in a fighting pose.
Zoro tiredly waves a hand at him, willing him to shut up.
“You really don’t know anything I’m talking about, do you?” He mutters, almost to himself.
Sanji’s backed to pissed and incredulous, and now he’s eyeing the counter that stands between him and the living room where his phone lies on the floor.
He ain’t the anchor anymore, and he ain’t the cook, either.
Next he's gonna say he doesn't know about the Grand Line or the All Blue.
Wait. That's it. He has to know about the All Blue. Right? That's something so intrinsic to Sanji it has to carry over.
Zoro snaps his fingers, pointing right at Sanji. "The All Blue. What about that? You still want to find it, right?"
Sanji blinks. "The what?"
"...I'm fucked." Zoro says, leaving the kitchen entirely.
"Hey-!"
Zoro sits down on the minimalist couch in the next room and hangs his head in his hands. This isn't helping him not look crazy either, he knows.
"Hey!" Sanji says again, appearing in front of him. He reaches down and grabs his phone off the rug from where it landed earlier. "Who even are you? You never told me."
"It's Zoro. Roronoa Zoro."
Sanji huffs a pathetic laugh at that. "Zoro? Like the swordsman from those old movies?"
"Oh, God, am I a movie star in this universe or something?"
Sanji rolls his eyes, seemingly debating whether he still wants to call the cops or not. "No. Those movies are from the 40's. You'd be old as hell. And he looks nothing like you."
Zoro glances up at him. "The 40's? Like…the 1440's?"
"...What? No, the 1940's."
"The 19 40's!? What year is it, damn it!?"
"It's 2023, asshole!"
Zoro just gawks.
"Why? What year did you think it was!?"
"...It's 1520. Back on the Grand Line."
"I don't know what the Grand Line is. But you're definitely crazy. Fuck, maybe I should call Nami?"
Zoro's head snaps around. "You know Nami? Nami's here?"
"...How do you know Nami?"
"If Nami's here, what about the others? Luffy? Usopp? Robin?"
"Uh…I know Usopp. None of the other names ring a bell."
Well, it's better than nothing.
"Yea, call them. Maybe I can manage to convince them instead."
"I'm not calling my friends over just so some weirdo who broke into my house can tell them his crazy talk."
Zoro rolls his eyes. "Just call them, would you!? God, you're even more annoying in this universe. Do you still lose your mind anytime a woman is within 50 feet of you, too?"
Sanji bristles at that, but doesn't reply. He does, however, pick up his phone, hesitating before he types in a few more digits.
Zoro doesn't get it, though.
"...What's that? Don't you have a Den Den Mushi?"
"...No? You want me to call them, or not?"
Zoro decides not to press it.
He hears Nami's voice on the other end of the line. There's no snail to speak her voice, so he has no idea how it's coming through, but it's definitely her, alright.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Nami. I, uh…I kinda have a situation here."
"What does that mean?"
"I mean…This weird guy with green hair showed up in my house with swords… And now he's saying he knows me and you and Usopp, and he's from some…other dimension??" Now Sanji feels stupid as he speaks. This entire situation can’t be real.
" WHY DID YOU CALL ME!? CALL THE POLICE, IDIOT! " A voice spikes on the other line, and yea, that's definitely Nami, Zoro thinks. Though she does actually sound concerned.
"I tried; he took my phone right out of my hands! And he insists he knows you two as well. Listen, I think he's harmless, he's just…" Sanji looks him over again, not even trying to be subtle with the distasteful glance he racks up and down Zoro’s person. "Strange."
Zoro grunts.
"Sanji-” She paused, changing directions. “What did you say he looked like?”
Sanji gives him that same once over with a side glance. “Our age, I think. Green hair. One eye. Dressed like a…samurai?”
Zoro (un)amusedly takes note of how unashamedly the cook talks about him like he’s not staring right at him.
“Are you sure he’s not just some weird cosplayer or something?”
“Pretty sure the swords were real.”
“But he’s not dangerous.” She sounds doubtful.
“...” Sanji gives Zoro a look, as if he’s asking . Zoro eventually shakes his head. “Promise.” He grunts.
“He’s not.” Sanji finally relinquishes.
“Ugh. Fine. I'll call Usopp. We'll text you when we're outside. But he better not be a serial killer."
"I think he's just insane." He retorts, looking Zoro right in the eyes as he says it. Zoro flips him off.
He hangs up the phone, sitting down across from the other in a small armchair.
"How long's it gonna take them to get here?" Zoro grunts out, wondering how long he'll have to wait here in awkward tension.
"Probably 15 minutes or something. They don't live far."
"They live on the same island as you here?"
"The same…island?"
"Yea. We picked everybody up at different places. And you're originally from the North Blue anyway, right?"
He isn't sure what part of the timeline they're in since it's 500 years in the future here, but things seem to be imitating their world at least somewhat. Zeff's still his father, he's still a cook, he still kicks. It's just a parallel to his world, right?
"I'm from France." Sanji says, staring him down like he's stupid.
"...What's France?"
"...Jesus Christ." Now it's Sanji who has his head caught in his hands.
Okay, well, maybe France is an island in the North Blue. He doesn't know a lot about the North Blue, if he's being honest.
…Now that he thinks about it, he doesn't know that much about the cook, either.
As if to mock him, Sanji interrupts his thoughts to say,
"What else do you know about me?" A single eye looking at him with scrutiny.
Zoro leans back, trying to think. He lists things off on his fingers as he goes.
"Well, you came from the Baratie, where you worked with your old man. You hate wasting food. You love women. You won't fight with your hands. You always dress like a prick. You smoke. And we don't get along."
"Oh, great." Sanji groans.
"Well? Am I right?"
"I- Most of it's accurate, yea. Except the dressing like a prick part." He says, giving him a glare. Surprisingly, Sanji isn't wearing a suit at the moment, but he's also at home. He's wearing a dress shirt similar to ones he's seen the cook wear around the ship.
…Where are they, actually? The question rises again in Zoro's mind. He looks to his left, where the windows are, currently covered with translucent curtains.
He stands, walking over to them without a word.
"Hey!" Sanji admonishes, following after him.
Zoro pulls the curtains aside, realizing they aren't windows, but doors to a balcony. He opens them and steps out into pleasantly cool air.
There's a sprawling metropolitan city before him, huge grey buildings, lights, and machines he doesn't understand, all filling the cityscape. The closest thing he can compare it to is Water 7, but there's no waterways here, just the same packed atmosphere with a lot more…metal.
Sanji appears beside him and grabs his arm, unsure whether the crazy man who's appeared in his apartment will jump or not. But Zoro just stares, flabbergasted.
"Where are we?" He asks.
"New York."
"And…where's that? What island are we on?"
"What is it with you and islands? We're in the state of New York, in the United States of America." He tries to emphasize.
"No islands?” Zoro frowns. “There's still sea, right?" Zoro's kind of terrified he's going to say there's no sea.
"There are still islands, we just aren't on one. And of course there's sea. The world's about 70% ocean."
"...Only 70%?"
Then there's a panicked knock at the door. Sanji curses, realizing he hasn't been looking at his phone. He jogs over to the door. Zoro follows at a distance, unsure what to expect from this world's Nami and Usopp.
Sanji goes to open it, only to realize it’s still locked. He makes a mental note to question Zoro again on how exactly he got in here.
Then he pulls the door open, and Nami and Usopp are huddled together on the other side, looking anxious and annoyed- doubly anxious on Usopp’s part. Doubly annoyed on Nami’s.
Zoro is relieved to see them, for whatever reason. He knows they won’t recognize him either- they’re both dressed weird too. Nami’s sweater and jeans combo isn’t too different from something she’d wear back home, but seeing Usopp in a dress shirt and a sweater is just weird. He doesn’t look like himself without the overalls and the goggles.
They make eye contact with Zoro and Usopp flinches, whining something to Nami about how he doesn’t wanna be here, and why did he have to come to, and actually he’s feeling a little sick, and he can make his own way back-. Zoro smirks. Yea, it’s still them.
Nami stomps in and crosses her arm, scrutinizing Zoro up and down. “Who are you, and what do you want?” She asks, the same voice she always uses when she’s intimidating the crew. If he knew it wouldn’t get his head beaten in, he’d smirk and call her witch .
“My name is Zoro. I’m from a different universe, and I- I guess I’m just trying to find a way back.” He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly.
They both look at Sanji. He throws up his arms. “I told you!”
Nami turns back to him. “Why would we believe that? That’s insane.”
“I can prove it. I know all three of you in my world. We sail on the same crew.”
“Crew?” Usopp interjects. “Like, we’re sailors?”
Zoro grins. “Nah. Pirates.”
“God, he just keeps getting more ridiculous…” She trails off.
“I’m not lying! I know it sounds crazy- apparently you guys don’t have devil fruits here, but…They give people crazy abilities. They’re like magic. All kinds of weird shit can happen with them.”
“And I don’t suppose you have a devil fruit to show us?”
Zoro frowns. “No. I don’t.” He isn’t amused.
“Convenient.” She squints.
“But I can prove I know you two. Nami-” He points to her, and she recoils a bit.
“You love money. And you’re a navigator. You love mapmaking and you can predict the weather. Am I right?”
She’s staring at him like an idiot. “I’m a daycare assistant, you weirdo.”
“...But you do like money.” Usopp mumbles.
“And aren’t you majoring in geography?” Sanji muses.
“And minoring in finance?” Usopp slides in again.
“DON’T ENCOURAGE HIM!”
“Usopp.” Zoro interrupts. “You’re a marksman. You hate mushrooms. You’re scared of everything. You’re a chronic liar. And you probably have a friend named Kaya, right?”
And they all blink at that, because everything except the marksman part is spot on. “Uh…” Usopp begins, just holding the syllable as he tries to think of something to say. Nami elbows him to make him stop.
“Okay, so he’s a stalker, too. Sanji, just call the police.” Nami orders.
Sanji pulls out his phone again and Zoro realizes his guesses aren’t enough. He kicks Sanji’s phone from his hand, yet again.
“Hey! Stop doing that!”
Nami and Usopp lurch back, taking his sudden lash out as a sign of aggression. They both yelp, tripping over each other to try and get back to the door. Zoro darts past them at an inhuman speed, cutting them both off.
“AH! How’d you do that?” Nami screeches, pushing Usopp in front of her. He screeches back.
Zoro just huffs. “Geez, all of you are acting like normal civilians. It’s pathetic.”
“Wh- We are normal civilians, what does that even mean ?” Sanji yells at him from back in the living room.
Zoro suddenly gets an idea. “Wait. Hey, Cook.” He says, looking past the terrified duo in front of him. “Do you still have your Haki, here?”
“No? I don’t know what that is.”
Zoro feels a lightbulb come on above his head. He channels his Haki, feeling the telltale signs of his hands and arms surging with the force, watching as they begin to turn black.
He holds his arms out so the others can see. Slowly, the darkness creeps up, from his fingertips all the way to his elbows.
All three of his audience members are staring at him like he’s grown an extra head.
“This,” He says. “Is Haki.”
“How…Did you do that?” Nami asks, daring to step closer to get a better look.
“It’s a power from our world. I’m guessing just like devil fruits, you don’t have it here.”
They all just weakly shake their heads.
“Finally. Do you believe me now!?” Zoro says, wanting to grin but too focused on reading their expressions. He’s still holding his arms out, black trils of Haki swimming above them.
They all exchange incredulous glances.
“...Maybe?” Nami decides.