Press My Lips to Your Back (Like it Could Take Away its Pain)

by supercharger

Chapter 6

Notes:

sorry this genuinely took nearly a month to get out. i hope the fact that this is like 23k makes up for the wait .. happy new years tho .. he he

sorry in advance for mistakes in this chapter bc ik there probably will be plenty.

The journey home felt agonizingly long, where he would usually zone out during the train ride he was now impatiently counting every single stop until it was theirs. Where comfort was usually found within the warm hold of Hanbin’s hand now only felt like it was burning, achingly teasing in its warmth as Hao’s mind couldn’t think of anything other than how they would soon come to rest upon his bare skin, marking it with finger print sized bruises and irritated red skin beneath warm drags of palms.

Hao was nearly breaking out into a sweat despite the cold night breeze, entirely too worked up with his own thoughts about what tonight would bring. What it would mean for the both of them to finally, after weeks of teasing of feelings and just enough touching to satisfy whiles till leaving Hao desiring so much more, delve into each other’s bodies completely.

When they walked up to his apartment door, unlike last time where he fumbled with his key, Hao held it securely in his fingers and with only a slight tremor, successfully slotted and opened the door on first attempt. Dragging Hanbin through the threshold, which he had now learned to step over instead of dragging his feet, Hao locked the door.

Without so much of a spoken word, too nervous to make more sound than necessary and possibly find themselves in a situation similarly to the first time Hanbin had been invited over to his home, Hao kicked off his shoes and pulled Hanbin towards his room; Hanbin stumbling helplessly by his lead, shoes tumbling off his feet as he was pulled away from the entrance before he could completely pull them off.

Taerae would make a comment tomorrow about the messiness of the shoes, how they were thrown around the living room without care. Hao left that for tomorrow’s Hao to stomach, mind much too preoccupied with tonight to spare a single thought for what tomorrow might introduce.

Once they were through the hall, with Hanbin very successfully hitting almost every single creak in the floorboard, Hao pulled Hanbin into his room and shut the door immediately behind him.

There was a sudden silence when their bodies stopped their insistent moving over the last thirty minutes. Hao led him home with determination, only coming to a stop momentarily when forced to sit during the train ride. His knees bounced and bounced as he watched the lights flicker over the train’s underground map, lighting up their next stop. Five more stops. Four.

Hanbin’s hand came to rest upon his knee and immediately he stilled his movements.

Now, within the four walls of his bedroom, there was only one place else that Hao could lead him and yet his feet stayed grounded by the closed door, fingers loosely intertwined with Hanbin’s.

All the embarrassment he should have felt during his overly eager walk home suddenly surged to the forefront of his mind as he stood in the still unlit room, thankful that he had not habitually turned on the light as he entered. Saved by the room’s darkness, the blush that had taken over his face barely noticeable with the moons light streaming into the window.

“I’ve never been in here before.” Hanbin commented, maybe understanding the heavy silence that followed their arrival as Hao’s sudden hesitance, instead of Hao just barely managing the burning of his embarrassment from his unsealed eagerness.

It was then, that Hao noticed that Hanbin’s eyes were not even on him, the blush he felt heat his cheeks further unrecognizable as Hanbin blindly looked around. The moons light barely enough to make out details on the silhouettes of furniture in his room.

Once he felt like he has tamed his own feelings, Hao released their hands just quick enough that he could flicker the overhead light on, illuminating his room for Hanbin to see; his brown eyes narrowing slightly as the sudden intrusion of light as they had already semi adjusted to the darkness prior.

“Is it what you imagined?” Hao asked, because he wasn’t entirely sure on how to respond to Hanbin’s obvious statement.

“I never really gave it much thought,” Hanbin spoke on a laugh, turning away from Hao now that their interlocked hands did not bind him so he could look around the room with greater interest. He turned to the dresser, a collection of Hao’s colognes scattered on the top, miscellaneous papers and mail discarded there out of laziness to sort or discard them.

Hao found himself wishing he had cleaned a little more that week, something he had promised himself to do but ended up forgetting about it entirely. He wished he made his bed like Taerae always nagged him to, telling him that ‘coming home to a clean, nicely made bed is the best feeling’. Instead, his sheets were a messy pile atop the bed, and a pillow was on the floor by the beds side from how much he tossed and turned in his sleep, ignored and kicked further aside when he had woken up.

Hanbin barely paid the mess any mind Hao had come to notice, his eyes fixated now upon the singular bookcase in the corner of his room after he had meticulously picked through the top of his dresser, like every discarded part of his daily life was interesting.

“It’s very you,” Hanbin continued his commentary about the room and Hao didn’t know how to take it, the messiness of his room definitely not the best thing to be compared to. Hao vaguely wonders if his room smells of his cologne or the body wash he has been using lately in the same extent that Hanbin’s room smelt of citrus. He wonders if it feels all-consuming to Hanbin as it had to him.

Hanbin’s had rose from his ride, nimble fingers running along the spines of dusty books that Hao hadn’t thought to clean in the last couple of weeks, “Do you read often?”

“Sometimes,” Hao responded, not lately he could have said but it was a conversation that was left for when he was cornered and forced to admit to having a dead father; most of the books he had taken from home a small portion of his fathers collections, ones he remembers him musing about to him as a young boy. He told himself he would get to read them some day.

It’s been years since he has moved to Seoul; he could count upon one hand how many books of his father’s collection he has read.

When Hao finally followed in his footsteps, moving away from the door to peak over Hanbin’s shoulder he noticed that he was now fixated on the different framed photos that Hao placed upon the bookshelf.

Many were with Kuanjui, from back home to when they had first arrived to Seoul together, commemorating the big move with a picture of them in front of the car they had used to transport all their things. The back open to showcase the items all shoved within it, in a way that was similar to tetris, as both were hoping to only have to drive the distance once.

Ricky and Taerae were in others. Yujin was in most.

“Is that your mother?” Hanbin asked when he came upon the third shelf. Upon mention of his mother, Hao moved forward, hooking his chin easily over Hanbin’s shoulder to see what he was looking at, already knowing what picture was there.

Behind slightly dusty glass, framed a picture of his small family of three at Yujin’s high school graduation. Yujin sandwiched between the two of them with a large bouquet of flowers that Hao had brought to him. He scowled at the extravagance of it all. Hao told him he should be lucky it was not bigger.

His eyes moved to his mothers face, aged beautiful with smile creases bracketing his delicate upturned lips. He found himself smiling down at the picture, chin slightly digging into the tops of Hanbin’s shoulder as he nodded.

“You guys look alike,” Curiosity is a killer, Hao knew if he was in Hanbin’s shoes he would be more than intrigued by the incomplete family photo but Hanbin did not ask about the lack of a father figure in that picture, Hao found himself grateful.

“Are you going to go through all my stuff?” Hao asks once his chin is forcefully dropped from Hanbin’s shoulders as he moves over to the desk, fingers idly gliding over the wooden polished top as he thumbs over more scattered papers.

“Maybe,” Hanbin hummed, barely bothered as he continued to nose through the things on his desk, picking up trinkets so he could turn them in his fingers before placing them down, slightly askew in their spot on his desk, “I like learning about you, there’s many things in here that have your history in them.”

He was looking at a small red panda figuring, cutesy in his design that Hao has had on his desk since moving here. It was the first present Taerae had bought him, found in one of his many trips to the second hand store. He said he looked at it, and immediately thought of him, so he had bought it. Hao acted like it was such a silly thing, saying he definitely does not look like a red panda. Still, he’s kept it to this day, even gluing an ear back on when he had accidentally dropped it before.

While Hanbin busied himself, Hao took to shrugging off his jacket, something that he normally would hang up on out in the entranceway but had completely forgotten about it. He draped it over the chair in the corner of his room, designated his clothing chair unintentionally as he always ends up discarding random clothes there when he feels too lazy to put them away, before he crosses the room to sit on his bed.

“You didn’t come here for history though, did you.” Hao points out, using his hands to pull himself backwards and further into the bed until he could rest his back upon the backboard, watching Hanbin slowly turn to him.

“I suppose it’s more of an extra,” Hanbin agrees, easily putting down the panda figure blindly before crossing the small space between the desk and the bed, sinking one knee into Hao’s sheets as he lowers himself. Hao feels the bed shift under his weight, feels his heart react similarly, suddenly spiking in speed as the topic of conversation was brought back to it’s original reason, “Tell me, what should I be more focused on?”

Hao watches as Hanbin begins his crawl, moving further into the bed; feeling like prey beneath carnivorous brown eyes as lust darkens them with every drag of his knee over the soft fabric of his sheets, bringing them closer until Hanbin’s hands were bracketing his waist, pressed against the bed beside where he sat, bringing their faces close enough that Hao could think of only mint.

“Maybe what I have to offer in the present instead.” Hao coyly suggests, hand finally finding the courage to rise from his lap, fingers just a ghost of a touch over Hanbin’s shoulder, as it comes to rest upon the bend of his neck, fingers curling around his nape, thumb gently tucked against the cut of his jaw.

“Will you teach me that instead then?”

“If that’s how you like it.” Hao easily agrees, his stomach churning its desire more insistently as he watches the way Hanbin’s body physically slumps at his words, his eyelids hooding as he regards Hao now through his thick lashes.

Hao could see the way Hanbin’s darkened eyes flicker to look at his lips, running over the bow curve of his upper lip hungrily. Playing dumbly, Hao’s tongue swipes tantalizingly slow over his bottom lip, wetting it as an invite for Hanbin’s own to take as he desired. Curling his finger into Hanbin’s nape, just so, Hao uses that to beckon Hanbin’s face closer, until he could feel the ghost of Hanbin’s pouted bottom lip against his own, barely a touch.

“Guess I should be calling you teacher then as well,” Hao could feel the way Hanbin’s lips spoke the words against his own, felt the shape of them long before his mind could process what was spoken; too lost in the dizzy muddled mess of his thoughts that came along with having Hanbin’s presence so close. “Laoshi”

It sounded like sin coming from his lips; deep and raspy, almost akin to a purr from the very back of his throat, vibrating against Hao’s own lips. The way he spoke sent a shiver down Hao’s spine, his entire body shaking beneath Hanbin’s with the intensity of it.

Before they could complete the kiss, Hao’s mind finally fully registered what he had said, long after his body physically reacted to it. Jerking his face back just enough that Hanbin’s features were no long a dizzying blur, Hao narrowed his eyes skeptically.

“You said you only knew a little!” Hao accuses, eyes further narrowing in accusation as he watched Hanbin’s once hungry lips quirk upwards in amusement at the sudden shift. “How do you know that?”

“Ricky, of course.” Hanbin supplies simply, closing the space between their faces that Hao had created once more so he could press a quick kiss to Hao’s pouted lips, slightly interrupted by the smug smile still turning the corners of his mouth. “I really do only know a little.”

Hanbin’s lips left his own, trailing slightly open lipped kisses on his cheek until he found the side of his jaw, Hao’s head tilting instinctually to allow him more space for his wandering lips to explore.

“Gege,” Hanbin hummed against his skin, sealing it there with a tender press of his lips, open mouthed with a gentle scraping of teeth, leaving irritated red skin behind as he moved further down his neck.

“Laoshi,” He breathed against the side of Hao’s neck, against the slightly dampened kissed skin, another unintentional shiver felt rippling its way up Hao’s spine. His fingers pressed desperately into the nape of Hanbin’s neck, feeling like he was seconds away from slipping if he did not find something to hold onto.

“Ricky taught you such stupid things.” Hao barely managed his voice, it came out slightly strained, eyes fluttering shut as he felt Hanbin’s teeth scraped over his adam’s apple. Hao’s head tilting now to the other side as Hanbin continued his lax attack over his neck, surely leaving dustings of marks behind when he stopped to gently suck on his skin.

Hanbin laughed against the newly wet skin before he was pulling back to look at Hao, who reluctantly, tiredly opened his eyes once more to look at Hanbin, feeling already too hot in his own clothes even though they haven’t done anything significantly intimate yet.

“Well… He’s the only one willing to teach me, unless you want to?”

Hao blinked at him, willing his heart to stay below his throat as he spoke, “Should I teach you something useful then?”

Hanbin nodded, eager, quick shakes of his head as he looked at Hao with expectation, brown eyes innocently wide with curiosity. Hao thought that maybe it wasn’t a good time to mess with him, seeing how eager he was to please and learn something new in Hao’s language.

In the end, due to Hao’s own selfish desires to hear what it would sound like coming from Hanbin’s pretty mouth, he instructed, “Repeat after me: Wo yao ni.”

Hanbin’s eyes followed the way Hao’s lips formed the foreign words, a saying he has yet to hear from Ricky. “What does it mean?” He questions, eyes still watching Hao’s pink lips long after they silenced.

“Just repeat it.”

“Wo yao ni,” His pronunciation was slightly off, a foreign twang to it but the way Hanbin’s eyes turned to look at him, wide with their innocence while saying something so far from it, made it physically impossible for Hao not to react. His cheeks tinted with a blush, embarrassingly reactive to the way those words sounding coming from Hanbin’s lips, his entire body suddenly feeling cold and needy, more acutely aware of how he wasn’t being touched in any way at the moment.

“You listen so well,” Hao praised, voice a hushed murmur, slightly wavering in its tone as he tried to not overwhelm himself too much with repeating the way Hanbin spoke the words in his head. Feeling a little ridiculous that he had managed to fluster himself with something he had requested.

“What does it mean?” Hanbin repeated, eyes fluttering over every possible feature of Hao’s face taking in miniscule reactions that he could not completely hide, his face a blushing open book for Hanbin’s gaze alone.

Hao felt a little embarrassed admitting to it because maybe it was shameless to have Hanbin say something he doesn’t know the meaning of, just so he could selfishly satisfy his own needs of hearing it in Hanbin’s velvety smooth voice.

When he didn’t offer up the information in a timely manner, too busy managing the new found blooming embarrassment he brought upon himself, Hanbin’s head dipped below his chin once more. He felt Hanbin’s lips press to his skin once more, nipping at the skin in a way that tickled.

Hao couldn’t stop his squirm as Hanbin’s lips tickled their way over his neck, doing his best to block Hanbin’s travelling lips as he tucked in his chin, limiting the expansion of neck he had access to. Hanbin found ways around it, nipping and biting at the exposed skin where Hao’s neck met shoulder.

In a further attempt to pull away, giggling all the while as Hanbin used his lips to pull the answer out of him, Hao slipped down from the beds backboard until he was laying on his back, flat against bed. Hanbin watched him slither his way further into the sheets, now beneath him entirely as he still used his hands to leverage his body off the bed, pressed now into the mattress framing Hao’s head.

“Tell me,” Hanbin insisted, his own laughter laced in his words as he hovered over Hao. Hanbin’s body completely covered Hao’s upper half, blocking the overhead light with the wide expansion of his set shoulders and broad chest.

From the way they were now settled on bed, Hao allowed himself the pleasure of gazing up at him, take in the slightly blushed features of his face and the way his hair messily hung off his forehead as he looked down at Hao. A single silver chain hung around his neck, dangling between their chests just in front of the pretty thin inked tattoo on his chest.

In an effort to act coyly, so his embarrassment didn’t become too evident in his confession of what he’s gotten Hanbin to say, Hao’s hand rose from his chest so he could hook a finger through the chain, using it as leverage to slightly pull Hanbin’s face closer; obediently, Hanbin’s elbows bent bringing their faces together just enough that they were once more sharing air.

“I want you.”

The way Hanbin looked at him made the air in his lungs go stale, a stuttered breath the only thing he could manage as he waited Hanbin’s response.

“Is that the meaning?” Hanbin questioned, his voice thick like honey, wrapping itself around Hao until he felt like the heaviness of it was weighing him down to the bed, holding him there like he was it’s captive. “Or a request?”

“The meaning of course,” Hao quipped, voice a teasing hushed whisper as he further pulled against the chain so Hanbin lowered more. Their lips ghosting over each other once more as he breathed out the next words, “Both, if you want.”

“Wo yao ni,” Hanbin practically purred into his mouth, sealing it with the press of their lips.

Suddenly there was the same urgency that they once had on their journey home, their kiss becoming more teeth than tender presses of lips. Hao’s finger unravelled from the chain so he could find Hanbin’s hips, cold hands finding their way beneath the fabric of his shirt, pressing into the toned warmth of the dips of his sides. His hands dragged up until his fingers were running over the imprint of his ribs, felt with every expansion of his chest as he pulled in rigid breaths.

When Hanbin pulled away from their kiss, Hao’s hands falling away from his bare skin in the process, a small mewl of disapproval left Hao’s kiss bruised lips at the sudden lack of contact. With swift movements, Hanbin’s fingers found the hem of his shirt and expertly pulled it over his head in one pull, the fabric falling from his fingers somewhere off the side of his bed.

Hao had ogled his bare chest before, back when they had spent a proper night together for the first time. It was different this time, he no longer had to hide the fact that he was looking, admiring; his eyes moving over the toned muscle of his chest and the slight softness of his stomach. He was so pretty, toned where necessary but not overly so, still soft and slightly pudgy in places where Hao could grip.

“You’re so pretty,” Hao couldn’t filter his thoughts, the compliment bumbling out of his mouth long before he could think to keep it to himself. His eyes racked over Hanbin’s body, only pulling away from their hungry venture once Hanbin leaned himself back over his body, this time his leg swinging over Hao’s hips so he could straddle him. The weight of his body resting on his knees and the palms that pressed into the mattress, completely conscious of not laying too much onto Hao’s body beneath him.

Hanbin shifted, Hao’s eyes watched the way the muscles in his arms flexed with the movement, as he adjusted his weight to only rely on a single hand, the other one leaving the bed so it could cup Hao’s flushed cheek. He felt the soft pad of Hanbin’s thumb run over the tops of his apple cheeks, against the sensitive skin beneath his eye. Much too tender in the way he held him.

“Gege’s prettiest,” Hanbin cooed, quieting Hao’s words long before he had time to say them, knowing he would probably make a comment about his use of the word once more, with the press of lips. Hao still groaned against his lips.

“Can I…” Hanbin’s question trailed off once he pulled away from the kiss, hand moving from Hao’s cheek so he could run his hands over the fabric of Hao’s shirt that was still pulled over his chest, silently requesting permission.
Hao only managed a single nod before Hanbin was leaning back on his knees. With an arched back as his only assistance, Hanbin was slipping the fabric up. Hao could feel the drag of his hands over his skin as the fabric was painfully, tactically slipped up until the entirety of his chest was exposed to Hanbin’s hunger riddled eyes.

Warm hands gentle cupped Hao’s chest, fingers pressed into skin as his thumb brushes over the small nub of his nipple. A desperate gasp is sucked in at the sudden touch, Hao’s hands finding their way to his face, hiding his flushed face within his own palms, only peaks of his eyes seen through his spread fingers as he observed Hanbin.

The way he was taking in Hao’s exposed body made the blush spread to colour his chest beneath the press of warm palms; Hao knew from the way Hanbin’s eyes fluttered over the entirety of his exposed skin that his blush did not go unnoticed.

Squirming under his gaze, Hao couldn’t stop the soft mewl from leaving his lips, muffled against his slight dampening palms, the room around the suddenly warmer than he has ever experienced before. Desperate for so much more of his touch, for his eyes to adore the entirety of his body and his lips to mark them for his own. While simultaneously already finding it much too overwhelming just being subjected to his gaze with only his blushing chest within eyesight.

“Hanbin,” Hao whispered, his voice coming out more whining than he would have preferred, when Hanbin’s thumbs pressed into his nipples. Brown eyes flickered up to look at Hao’s face for the first time since his chest was exposed, his gaze slightly dazed like he was pulled from deep lustful thought by the sound of his voice. Behind palms, Hao felt confident enough to speak, even if it came out as more of a beg than a demand, “I need more.”

Hanbin’s thumbs idly moved over his nubs, sweet gasps still leaving Hao’s parted lips behind his palms, no immediate hurry to his movements as he still sat on his hips, fixated on the noises he could produce from a simple touch. Even with Hao’s words, Hanbin’s hands never faltered, exploring his chest with tentative brushing of fingers tips, ghostly touches over blushing skin like he was memorizing every dip and crevice.

After a moment, where Hao had already accepted that his request would go ignored in favour for Hanbin’s own desire to touch him, Hanbin finally spoke, “What do you need?”
From a single look alone, Hao knew that Hanbin already was well aware of what he needed, evident in the way he gazed at Hao beneath him, through heavy hooded eyelids and long wispy dark lashes. He knew exactly why Hao’s body was quivering beneath his touch, could probably feel his arousal against his own thigh from where he sat upon his thighs. Still, petulantly he posed his question, the small curve found in the corner of his lips showing it was more of a tease than anything; wishing to hear Hao’s pleas than being truly ignorant.

Hao could forgo giving Hanbin want he wanted, could stick his nose up and withhold his own noises so Hanbin would have to find a new place to fixate his touch to bring Hao’s attention back. The painful throb within his pants, and the irritated skin of his nipple being teased by Hanbin’s soft thumb pad was enough for Hao to succumb.

“You,” Hao supplied dumbly, hands finally leaving his face, red marks left on his unblemished skin, a mixture of his own blush and the irritation his warm hands imprinted there. He wasn’t sure where he was reaching until he found his fingers curling around the younger ones bicep.

Hanbin hummed, pleased enough for now with the response as he completed the job of pulling Hao’s shirt off over his head, the fabric blindly thrown behind to fall somewhere along side Hanbin’s own on the floor. With the intrusion of his shirt crumbled up over his chest gone, Hao slid his hands up to curl around muscular shoulder, using it as leverage to pull Hanbin close once more, lips finding each others in a messy clash.

Quicker than Hao had wanted, Hanbin’s lips left his own, his head fitting against the side of his neck as he once more began to pepper kisses there. His lips didn’t linger against the previously marked skin of his neck for long until they were finding his shoulder, trailing kisses over the swell of his bicep as Hao’s fingers found their place amongst the mess of hair sat atop Hanbin’s head. Chin tucked as all he could do was watch and feel the way Hanbin’s lips dragged along his skin.

“Are you this slow and meticulous with every thing?” Hao breathed, trying his best to sound nonchalant even though every part of his body burned from his poorly concealed yearning.

He felt Hanbin’s laugh against his bicep, a small red bruise left behind once he lifts his head from where he was nestled into his arm, lips a pretty red and messy from his own spit. “I always take my time with things. At my job for example,” Hanbin breathes against his skin as he moves to press a kiss to the center of his chest. Hao barely has time to register what’s happening before Hanbin’s head is dipping lower to press another kiss, eyes flickering up between his lashes to look at where Hao could only desperately tuck his chin to keep his eyes on Hanbin, fingers still tangled in his hair. He looked sinful from this angle, “But you know that.”

Hao thought his face could not become redder than it was but with the memory of how they met suddenly surging to the forefront of his thoughts, he could feel the way his cheeks burned its reflection on his face. He could barely hiccup a response, his voice crumbling on his tongue when Hanbin’s thighs dragged down his legs so his lips could press lower, just above his belly button.

“I find myself taking my time the most with you.”

“When I visit your job?” Hao asked redundantly, voice too weak for the attempt at a joke he was trying, “I would hope so.”

The breathy laugh was cold against the wet patch Hanbin sucked into his skin, his head raising after pressing a final kiss just above the band of Hao’s briefs that peaked out over his jeans. “Obviously. I already told you, no customers of mine have ever gotten hard on my table.”

Hao was coherent enough to know he was once more being teased, his fingers losing their grip on Hanbin’s wisps of hair in favour of smacking his shoulder. Another laugh emitted from Hanbin’s lips, a gentle nip of teeth felt against the sensitive skin of the swell of his belly as his retaliation.

“In all ways,” Hanbin continues, pulling away from his skin, admiring the patches of pink left behind that mark his trail down the body, his fingers now replacing where his lips once were as they soothed over the newest kiss bruise just above his jeans waist line. “I’ve wanted to fuck you since you refused to turn on my table.”

The way he speaks is so nonchalant for such a filthy confession, his eyes not meeting Hao’s has he focuses on the way his fingers drag through his own spit on Hao’s stomach, tracing absent designs there.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you since I saw you sitting there with your cheeks full of lettuce,” Hanbin glanced up at him through his lashes, finger stilling on his skin. It’s gentle pressure felt much heavier than it ever was, Hao felt like it held him down against the bed, pinned by a finger and the tender look in Hanbin’s eyes.

Hao gulped audibly, “Why didn’t you?”

Hanbin’s brow quirked, “You avoided me like I was a plague. Tell me, when was the best time to kiss you?”

Hao smiled to himself, remembering how mortifying the situation was for him all that time ago; he wonders how Hao of that time would react to knowing that exact man he tried (and failed) to avoid was in his bed, straddling his legs and marking his entire chest like it was his. His smile grew despite himself knowing that Hanbin was experiencing the entire situation so much different than he was. How silly, Hao thought to himself. Every second he spent avoiding could have been spent like this instead, relishing in Hanbin’s touch and melting beneath his sweet words.

“That night in your bed would have been a good time.” Hao offers, hands coming to pull Hanbin’s messy bangs from his forehead, fingers laced in his hair once more so he had a better view of his face beneath him, chin low enough that he could practically rest it upon his thigh if he ever wished.

“With your pillow blockade in the way?”

Hao laughed, head falling back against the pillows, his smile hidden up towards the ceiling as he remembered how truly foolish he acted all those weeks ago. “I guess I didn’t make it particularly easy for you.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Hanbin hummed, without looking Hao could feel the intrusion of his fingers hooking beneath the waist band of his jeans, gently petting against the skin of his groin just beneath where his jeans sat, “I’ve got you now, so the wait was worth it.”

“Got me and yet you are still so slow at taking what you want.”

Hanbin’s laughter was felt like a hot wave over the bulge in his pants, causing Hao to finally flicker his gaze back down, noticing how much closer Hanbin’s mouth had come to his clothed erection; practically mouthing at it with every word his spoke. “Can’t I take my time admiring what is mine?”

Even though his words seemed like he would only continue teasing him, his mouth still found Hao’s bulge with open lips, gently mouthing at the fabric pulled taunt around his aroused. Hao’s reactiveness was instinctual, his back arching at the minuscule attention his cock was finally receiving, the damp warmth of Hanbin’s mouth a haven for how painfully aroused he was.

Hao’s fingers massaged Hanbin’s scalp as he mouthed over his bulge, minutes stretched on to feel like hours until the fingers petting his groin were slipping out from beneath the fabric of his jeans and making blind work at his jeans button. It popped open and soon the zipper was being dragged down, the relief of pressure from his tight jeans causing Hao to sigh.

Hanbin’s mouth pulled away just far enough that he could cook his fingers into the loops of Hao’s jeans and pull them down, assisted only by Hao’s obedient hips raising off the bed. His jeans were pulled down just enough to rest bunched on his thighs, Hanbin’s lips continuing its lax mouthing at his still clothed erection, fingers toying with the briefs hem.

It was only when Hao breathed a whine, did Hanbin finally listen, the fabric of his brief slowly pulled away, his fully erect cock red and irritated now resting, exposed against his groin. Once the briefs were tucked away with his jeans pulled taunt around his thighs, Hanbins fingers danced along the insides of his thighs, tickling just around his cock, savoring the sound of pitiful whines that left Hao’s lips.

Hao watched as Hanbin nosed his way along the inside of his legs, kissing every where other than the very glaring issue of his erection. Lips marking the insides of his thighs, sensitive skin bruising purple under the gentlest suckle of lips.

His lips lowered, completely disregarding Hao’s cock in favour of pressing more kisses to the newly exposed skin, fingers lowering the bundle of his briefs and jeans as he went until he was slipping them fully from his legs. Similarly, with a dull thud, the pile of clothing slipped from the beds edge and landed on the floor. Hanbin, having had shifted to fully get Hao’s pants off, now sat on his knees between Hao’s slightly spread legs, hands circling his ankles.

Hao could feel everywhere Hanbin’s eyes were devouring him, his knees knocked together to block Hanbin’s gaze from settling on his exposed, bitterly aroused cock. His attempt at covering himself was quickly pulled apart when Hanbin’s hands dragged up his shins, tucking between his knees to gently pry them apart, exposing him fully once more.

His hands, long since losing their place in Hanbin’s hair once he pulled too far for him to reach, found solace once more in covering his burning face, feeling embarrassed from the way Hanbin was taking in his completely exposed body.

“So pretty,” Hanbin’s whispered compliment nearly was drowned out by the thumping of his embarrassed heart, clogging his ears as he attempted to school his expression, calming his blush as he peaked up at Hanbin through his fingers once more. His body squirmed under Hanbin’s gaze, everything becoming too much.

“It’s so embarrassing being the only one naked.” Hao whined, tucking his knees together once more in an attempt to hide away again. This time, Hanbin just laughed, hands soothing their palms over his shin as he leaned down to press a kiss to the tops of Hao’s knee.

“It’s not new though,” Hanbin commented, resting his chin atop Hao’s locked knees, fingers dragging down his shins to once more lock his fingers around Hao’s ankles as they bracketed his hips. “You’ve always been the only one naked on my table.”

Hao groaned, audibly making his embarrassment known, his foot raising off the bed to knock against Hanbin’s hip in his protest. “It’s so much different!”

“How so?”

“The room at your parlor is so much darker, for one.”

“Should I turn off the lights?” Hanbin asked earnestly, head tilting atop Hao’s knees, cheek pressing against his skin. Hao felt his stomach flutter just watching the way Hanbin moved, how the teasing in his tone completely dropped away when he begun to consider Hao’s comfort.

His hands left his face, one reaching out to pet Hanbin’s cheek affectionately, as his head begun to shake despite his previous complaints, “No, I wanna see you.”

Hanbin’s smug smile replaced any worry that was there, head lifting from Hao’s knees so he could once more pry apart his legs. This time, instead of ogling his body, Hanbin slotted himself between his legs, hickey painted thighs straddling his hips as he lowers himself between him, hands settling once more on either side of Hao’s head, their faces brought together again after spending so much time parted.

Like he couldn’t hold himself back, Hao tilted his head up just enough to capture Hanbin’s lips in a quick, gentle kiss. Because he was close enough. Because he was allowed to now, since they’ve long since crossed any barrier that would prevent them from stealing kisses whenever they wanted to.

“Wanna see me?” Hanbin questions, his tone laced once more with a seductive teasing tone, something Hao had become much too acquainted with. Despite having an inkling where his agreement would lead, Hao nodded his head. Like expected, prompted by Hao’s admission, Hanbin continued, “Wanna watch me fuck you?”

Hao’s breath hitched in his throat, the throbbing of his hearts beat once more found in his throat as Hanbin’s hips, still clad in denim jeans, ground down against his bare cock. The drag of his fabric was slightly painful against his cock, the time it had gone forgotten making it sensitive. A sudden, throaty moan of pleasure left Hao’s lips despite that, contented just with the attention his erection was finally receiving.

Hao’s fingers blindly found the sides of Hanbin’s neck, curling there, pads of fingers pressing into his nape as he met Hanbin’s grind with his own, lifting his hips. His head lolled back against the pillow as they continued to circle their hips, bare cock rubbing against Hanbin’s clothed one in sync.

Hanbin’s hips still, leaving only Hao to rut up against him in desperation, too absorbed in chasing his own pleasure to notice that Hanbin was no longer moving with him. It was only when a bruising touch was pressed to his hip, forcefully stopping his hips so Hao could not longer grind up against him, did Hao come back to his senses.

Lifting his head dizzily from the pillow, Hao looked at Hanbin, a whine leaving his lips when he was met with a composed, teasing look. The only thing that indicated he was also even slightly dazed with his own arousal was the bright flush on the tops of his cheeks, small beads of sweat collecting in his sideburns.

“Tell me,” Hanbin’s voice was like velvet, soft and warm as he spoke.

“Tell you what?” Hao grunted, hips lifting despite Hanbin’s hold to press further into Hanbin’s own groin. Gaining only a little traction before Hanbin was lowering his hips down, locking him in place against the bed unable to move.

“How much you want me to fuck you,” Hanbin explained, voice drawn out like it was the simplest thing that didn’t need explanation. His head cocked to the side, body shifting his weight so he could cup one hand over one of Hao’s blazing red cheek, thumb pressing into his pretty pouted bottom lip, eyes fixated on the way the colour dulled beneath his press. “I want to hear you say it.”

Under normal circumstances, he would probably stick his nose up petulantly, refusing to do as requested until the other caves and just gives him what he wants, what he deserves from all his patience thus far.

These were not normal circumstances, Hao has never yearned for someone in the way that he has for Hanbin. Weeks of built up tension knocking down his will to act even the slightest bit bratty, embarrassment tampered down until he could no longer feel its achy itching in the pit of his stomach.

“Please,” Hao breathed out wetly, slightly muffled against the thumb pressed against his lips. “I need you so badly,” One hand left the side of Hanbin’s neck, instead circling around his wrist, guiding the thumb further into his mouth until he could properly wrap his lips around it, thumb scrapping over its underside. “You already said I’m yours, so make me believe it.”

The look of pure, unadulterated aching desire that passed over Hanbin’s otherwise open, innocent eyes had Hao’s lips hesitating over his thumb, a shiver felt tickling his spine as he attempted to hold his own while dealing with this new found gaze. Hao’s mouth sunk down until the entirety of his thumb was in his mouth before he was pulling back, slowly, tasting and savoring the salty taste of his skin.

“Please,” Hao’s voice wavered, slightly wrecked from sucking on Hao’s thumb. “Fuck me.”

A fire was lit behind Hanbin’s eyes, his usual lax movements suddenly quick and purposeful as he pulled away to sit once more on his knees. Hands fumbling with his zipper blindly, eyes too fixated on Hao’s lips to focus on anything else. “I’m going to fuck you,” Hanbin announced, a slight childish giddiness to his tone.

An affectionate smile curled up Hao’s lips, admiring the way he seemed almost excited with the mere idea of being able to finally have his way with Hao; a complete different person from the dark eyed man that was on top of him before.

“You’re gunna fuck me,” Hao played along, watching Hanbin continue to mess up unbuckling his own pants. “If you can even manage your pants.” Hao laughed, sitting himself up so his lets still bracketed Hanbin’s thighs, but now he could easily brush away Hanbin’s hands and take over the act of unbuttoning his pants.

Hanbin’s hand stilled in the air, fingers twitching like he wished to assist but otherwise leaving everything for Hao’s fingers to do. As he unbuttoned the top button and zipped his pants undone, he was acutely aware of the eyes watching his movements, hands slightly shaking beneath the audience.

Slipping his fingers beneath the waistband of Hanbin’s jeans, he looked up at him through his lashes as he slipped the denim down his thighs. When he saw no hesitance in his wide open eyes, Hao found his courage to lift his hands once more, hooking them in the band of his briefs and tugging those down as well, both fabrics bundled on his thighs, unable to go further due to him sitting on his knees.

Allowing himself a moment to still his breathing, Hao held Hanbin gaze for a second longer before succumbing to his desire to peak. He’s touched it before, felt its weight in his palm and saw it under shadows that heavily obscured his vision. He vaguely knew it would be big, but still, when he glanced down he found himself taking in an audible breath at the sight of it; bobbing fully erect against his lower belly, head a painfully bright red, slightly wet from precome that smeared in his briefs as they grinded against each other.

Swallowing thickly, Hao’s hands moved so he could grasp Hanbin’s cock, feeling its similar weight rest upon his palm as his fingers wrapped around his width. Encouraged by the stuttered breath he heard from above, Hao’s thumb collected the remnants of Hanbin’s wetness to use as lubricant as he begun to drag his hand experimentally. It wasn’t enough, his palm slowly dragging dryly over Hanbin’s cock, from his head down to the base where he gave it a gentle squeeze. His cock painfully twitching between his bruised thighs as Hanbin audibly reacts to a simple touch.

With his hand still moving over Hanbin’s erection, he slouches his back, straining just neck just slightly in the way they are situated so his lips could meet the tip of Hanbin’s cock; the angle was awkward and the way he had to contort his back was slightly uncomfortable, but the immediate moaning reaction that Hao’s warm lips evoked from Hanbin’s mouth was enough for him to disregard his own comfort. Suckling at Hanbin’s tip, lapping up the trickles of precome that leaked from its slit, savoring its slightly sour taste.

He felt warm hands soothe over his hair, fingers twitching as they gathered a handful, dull pain felt on his scalp from Hanbin’s sudden grip before it was falling away, his hands continuing their aimless drag over his hair, like they didn’t know where to settle. At some point they dragged down the nape of his neck, mapped the feeling of his protruding shoulder bones and felt the ridges of his spines curve, hungry to touch every part of Hao, like he hasn’t already done it all before.

Maybe the shift of intimacy in the situation was enough for his body to feel less familiar under Hanbin’s trained hands, a new map to explore and mark even mole and birth mark to memory.

The only noises heard were Hanbin’s reactive breathy moans and the wet sounds of Hao’s lips around the tip of his cock, sucking as much as he could from the angle he was in as his hand worked over the rest, using the saliva that dribbled from his lips as lubricant.

When Hanbin’s cock twitched between his lips, Hao’s hand begun to move faster over his length, coaxing out the orgasm he knew Hanbin’s stomach was twisting to release. His efforts only stilled once the head of Hanbin’s cock was suddenly pulled from his needy mouth, drool pooling on his chin as he blearily looked at Hanbin, who had fallen back to rest the back of his thighs on his calves, make his cock out of reach.

A small groan left Hao’s mouth, the hands the found his shoulders strong enough to hold him back from shifting his position so he could get his mouth around him once more.
“You’re going to make my come at this rate.” Hanbin’s voice sounded so blissfully wrecked, like the moans he had heard were not everything his chest willed to produced, choked down instead so he didn’t come off as too whiny.

“Isn’t that a good thing?” Hao slurred, licking over his bottom lip like he could still taste Hanbin there. His hand beginning to work over Hanbin’s cock again once the initial shock of him pulling away subsided, his eyes never leaving Hanbin’s wide blown ones as he spoke, “Don’t you want to fuck my mouth? Wouldn’t I look pretty?”

Hao watched Hanbin’s adam’s apple bob in an effort to swallow, his lips setting in a line and his chest heaving as Hao’s hand relentlessly, lazily worked over his erection, barely a ghost of a touch; just enough to be teasing and for Hanbin to be aware that he was still touching him, but not enough to drag out his orgasm because what a waste would it be for it to end up on Hao’s comforter.

After composing himself, eyes shutting while he regulates his breathing and everything, Hanbin pins him with a look that makes Hao’s movement falter, his skin tingling. Just when he thought he might have gotten the upper hand, Hanbin was rising onto his knees once more, crowding Hao’s space enough to force him back onto the bed, air exhaled out of his spit slick lips as he falls onto his back into his messy comforter, helplessly left to watch as Hanbin crawls up his body once again.

“You’re always pretty,” Hanbin confirms easily, peppering kisses over the defining line of Hao’s belly as he works himself up. Teeth grazing over his nipple in passing but never stopping to properly tease it, Hao seething beneath him from the slight touch anyways. He sucks a small, temporary mark into Hao’s peck before lifting his head to look at him, “You’d look so much prettier while taking my cock, don’t you think?”

Hao couldn’t stop the needy whine that left his throat at the thought of being filled by Hanbin. His hips shifting as Hanbin settles between them, he could feel the scratch of his denim jeans on the underside of his thighs and the soft wetness of his cock as it pressed into the crevice of his groin, slotted right beside his own.

“Do you have lube?” Hanbin inquires, met with an enthusiast nod of Hao’s head as he turned to look at the nightstand off to their right. Unable to move, with the pressure of Hanbin’s body holding him down, he relies on Hanbin stretching over to the edge of the bed, fumbling with the top drawer as he strained to find the bottle inside. Hao’s hands finding purpose in touching Hanbin’s exposed skin, dragging up his side, feeling the notches of his ribs beneath where the skin is pulled taunt from his stretch, to his chest once he settles back on top of him, splaying his fingers across its broadness.

Another whine was muffled by the press of Hanbin’s lips against his own, his hands scrambling to hold onto Hanbin’s shoulders as he feels his large hand grip his thigh, hitching his leg up to sit higher on Hanbin’s waist, his hip slightly lifted from the comfort of his bed.

Blindly, Hanbin popped the bottles top off and lathered his fingers with a generous amount. Hao shivered against Hanbin’s feverish kiss as he felt the cold wetness drag over the inside of his thigh. A sigh leaving his parted lips, breathing into Hanbin’s mouth, as the wet fingers came to rest their pads over his hole. A nip of Hanbin’s teeth against his bottom lip and the sudden intrusion of his finger, sinking slowly into his warmth until the first knuckle, had Hao gasping.

Carefully, Hanbin begun to pump his finger inside of Hao’s warmth, eyes attentive as they watched the way Hao’s face contorted with pleasure from the slow drag. It had been so long since he had last slept with someone, a single finger felt like it could be enough to bring him to completion. In an effort to prevent him from coming undone long before Hanbin had entered him, Hao closed his eyes and pulled in deep breaths as much as he could while still being mindful of managing the volume of his whines.

Once one became to little, Hao ground down against Hanbin’s hand, nodding at him feverishly when he was met with an inquisitive stare. Words unnecessary, Hanbin completely understanding Hao’s body, he carefully worked another coated finger into Hao’s hole.

Slowly, he pumped two fingers inside of Hao, feeling him loosen up around them. A small curve of his fingers pressed into the sensitive bundle of nerves as Hanbin plunged his fingers as deep as they could go, knuckles pressed into the flesh of Hao’s ass. A yelping moan left Hao’s lips at the sudden spark of pleasure shot through his body from the press, hand consciously finding his mouth to muffle his noises as Hanbin continued to fuck his fingers directly into his spot.

A third one was inserted, diligently stretching him out until Hao could barely breath behind the press of his own palm. He ripped his hand away from his mouth, pressing it into Hanbin’s chest, damp from his breath, fingers curling into his unmarked skin. “Please,” He moaned, hips grinding down to meet Hanbin’s fingers half way, a strangled moan leaving his lips, “Please.”

Hanbin’s eyes watched him writhe beneath him, flickering from his flushed face to where his fingers were buried inside of him, admiring the way he was stretched out around his three fingers. “Are you sure?” Hanbin questioned, voice coming out breathlessly like he was the one being taken to their breaking point. The flush on his chest proof that just listening and being the cause of Hao’s pleasure was enough to arouse him as well.

With quick nods, Hao’s hand moved from his chest to grip Hanbin’s chin, tilting his head so he was forced to look away from where his fingers connected them, eyes blown wide with lust, though concern for Hao’s comfort could be seen in the very edges of Hanbin’s pretty brown irises. Hao managed a smile, the best he could do as his teeth sunk into his cheeks to prevent more wailing moans from leaving his throat, and nodded again, reassuring.

“I want you so bad, please.”

Too far gone to take on the teasing tone that he had once enjoyed earlier, Hanbin nodded along obediently, his fingers slipping out of Hao’s warmth, his hole clenching around the sudden absence. As trained as before, Hanbin lathered his cock with lubricant from his fingers and a little more from the bottle before chucking it off to the side, probably not properly capped and leaking onto Hao’s sheets. If he was in his right mind, he would complain about the greasy stain it would leave, like their bodies weren’t already leaving impressions of their night in his fabric causing him to have to do laundry anyways.

Hao was pulled from his silly thoughts when he felt the tip of something much thicker nudge against his hole, lifting his head to look between their bodies. He couldn’t see where they were connected, but could make out Hanbin’s messy hands wrapped around his cocks base, lining him up. Hanbin’s head lifted when he felt Hao shift beneath him, searching his eyes for any hesitance.

In an effort to soothe his worry, Hao dragged him into a kiss, much too tender and sweet for the intimacy of the moment. With patience Hao couldn’t fathom in the moment, Hanbin slowly begun to push into him, their foreheads knocking together, Hao’s eyes unfocused as he holds Hanbin’s gaze.

With a slack jaw, Hao’s moans come out more like gasping breaths as Hanbin pushes further into him, the stretch is almost unbearable, painful around his rim. A couple of times his hips stilled, in his hazed state Hao could barely make out the words Hanbin was saying, barely able to trace the movements of his lips with his heavily hooded eyes; too focused on the searing pain between his legs, his brain having to work overtime in reminding him to breath through it.

Managing short, what he hopes are reassuring, nods every time Hanbin stalls, he continues to push further into him until Hao could feel the press of his groin against his own, perfectly slotted between his legs, like the space between his thighs were molded to home Hanbin’s hips.

The effort of keeping his head raised suddenly felt like too much, his head falling back against the pillow exasperatedly as he struggled with his breathing. Hanbin wasted no time taking that as an invitation to press his sweat damp face into Hao’s neck, just resting his forehead against his pulse point.

“You’re so tight, gege,” Hanbin pants against his skin. “Does it.. Do you feel okay?”

Hao could barely manage to find his voice, as he tilted his head to press his cheek into the mess of black hair, grounding himself with the familiar scent of citrus that lingered in his locks. He nodded against the top of his head, could feel the way Hanbin’s lips smiled against his jugular.

“Can I keep going?”

Hao’s hip shifted, a poorly disguised breath pulled in through clenched teeth as the sting of pain was still present from the small movement. He felt hands sooth over his sides, comforting him with their patience, like despite his eagerness he was happy to sit still for hours if it meant the end result was pleasurable for Hao.

Despite the dull ache, Hao managed another nod into Hanbin’s hair.

It started slow, Hanbin’s hips pulling back, the drag of his cock against Hao’s walls making him bury his face further into Hanbin’s hair, arms finding solace in wrapping around Hanbin’s neck, hugging him desperately to his body. His hips leisurely pushed back into him, bottoming out so the tip of his cock was buried deeply inside him. Hao thought he could feel it in his throat from how deep the pressure was.

It was slow and tender, Hao could practically feel Hanbin’s heart beating along with his own from where their chests were pressed together, damp skin rocking together with every thrust of Hanbin’s hips. He could hear Hanbin’s mumbled praises, pressed into the skin of his neck. Felt an overwhelming sensation of being loved when Hanbin’s arms wound themselves around the middle of his back, hugging him back as tightly as Hao was holding his neck.

He’d never, ever been fucked this intimately before. He has laid with many, in positions the other deemed most pleasurable. Never once, has he had someone take such careful time with him, to hold him in his arms with such a protective, strong hold. It was as tender as it was filthy, their synced hearts beating in time accompanied by the sound of Hanbin’s balls gently slapping against Hao’s ass as he bottoms out.

Once gasping breaths turned into uncontrollable whines with every laxed drag of Hanbin’s cock inside of him, the younger took it as a sign of Hao’s comfort, his pace beginning to pick up. His hips jerky in their movement as he tried to find a new pace, knees bracing more firmly on the mattress as he fucked into Hao’s warmth.

He could feel the hot pants of Hanbin’s breath against his throat, sometimes his teeth would graze his adam’s apple and Hao would squirm in his hold. When pleasure began to become more prominent than the dull pain of the stretch, Hao begun to lift his hips, meeting Hanbin’s thrust half way. The new angle pushing the tip of Hanbin’s cock directly into the bundle of nerves, a shocking amount of pleasure shooting through Hao’s body at the sudden jap at his most sensitive spot.

His body shook from the shock of pleasure, toes curling as he did his best to muffle his moans by helplessly pressing his lips together in a tight line. Pleased by Hao’s reaction, relentlessly Hanbin’s cock begun to target his prostrate, hitting it with every other thrust of his hips.

Hao could feel his orgasm burning in the pit of his stomach, tears clinging to his lashes clumping them together as he squeezed his eyes shut, biting desperately onto his bruised bottom lip in an attempt to hold himself. He wanted to last so much longer, pleasure Hanbin and ride out their orgasms together. But with every connection of Hanbin’s head with his prostate, his mind begun to become dizzy and his body shook with his own effort to draw out his orgasm for as long as possible.

“Hanbin,” Hao moaned his name, arms tightening around his neck, holding onto him with such a desperation to have him closer than ever physically possible. “I’m gunna…” His ragged voice was suddenly cut off by a whiney yelp as Hanbin pressed into his prostate, his movement suddenly becoming quick and jerky, losing most of its rhythm as he focused purely on hitting that exact spot inside Hao each time.

“It’s okay,” Hanbin’s voice sounded raw as he panted out against his throat. When his head finally lifted from his neck, their faces brought back together, Hao could barely make out most features of his face as he blearily looked at him through his wet lashes. “I’ve got you baby, I’ll take care of you.”

Hao didn’t know if the sobbing sound that left his mouth was from pleasure or the sudden overwhelming surge of emotion that came with Hanbin’s chosen words. When Hanbin’s lips overlapped his own, drinking in his sobbed noises, Hao did his best to manage his lips well enough to properly kiss him back.

Like his body was effortlessly light, Hao was suddenly lifted from the comfort of his bed, the sweat of his back chilling against the air of the room once exposed. He yelped in surprised as their bodies were manoeuvred as one, Hanbin’s cock never once leaving him as Hao was settled atop his thighs, straddling his lap.

With the sudden switching of the position, Hao’s jaw slacked against Hanbin’s still feverishly kissing ones. His eyes struggling to stay open, gaze blurred and disoriented even when he managed to lifted his eyelids. Now sitting atop Hanbin’s lap, it had somehow, impossibly buried Hanbin’s cock further inside of him. Like he could feel the swell of its intrusion burning in the pit of his stomach.

With Hanbin’s arms still wound around his waist, holding him in place, the hips below him began to circle. The entirety of his cock inside Hao’s walls, grinding slowly and precisely against his prostrate with every circle of his hips. In an effort to be of use, even in his incoherent state of mind and his body slouching pathetically against Hanbin’s sturdy, broad chest, arms clasped around his neck like it was his only life line, Hao managed to muster enough energy to lock his ankles together where they sat against Hanbin’s lower back, and grind himself down onto Hanbin’s cock.

The budding sensation of his orgasm creeping up on him left his knees weak, his hip movements sloppy as he tried to match Hanbin’s lazy grind. The longer they moved together in sync, the harder it became to hold his head up. It lolled to the side, his cheek resting upon his damp upper arm, fingers painfully aching as they did their best to hold up his dead weight. It was only barely manageable with the assistance of Hanbin’s protective, strong hold around his waist.

There, in muscular arms that held him with too much tenderness, Hao’s body seized up. His untouched cock, nestled against the small, fleshy part of Hanbin’s lower belly, twitched and released spurts of his ecstasy, smearing his and Hanbin’s bellies in white.

Even with only white noise muddling his brain, Hao still managed to keep his strength enough to continue grinding down against Hanbin. Seething through clenched teeth when the high of his orgasm had passed and the fullness suddenly became too much, his body becoming too sensitive. Hanbin’s large hands soothed over the dips of his hips, gentle touches over the softest parts of his back as his forehead came to press against Hao’s collar bone, breathing staggered.

It didn’t take much time afterwards for Hanbin to follow, Hao felt it much sooner than his brain could register the grunts of pleasure falling loudly from Hanbin’s lips that were pressed just above his nipple. Deeply, Hanbin released into him, filling him even further, to a point where Hao thought he might burst.

A couple more tired circles of Hanbin’s hips were all he had left to ride out the tail ends of his orgasm before he was stilling, the only sound found in the room were their panting breaths.

“Baby,” Hanbin was the first to break the silence, his voice coming out hoarse and brittle, like he had just barely managed to find it before immediately calling out the pet name.
Preening beneath the new name, Hao lifted his head from his own arm so he could bury his nose into Hanbin’s sweaty hair, breathing in the distant scent of citrus, mainly cloaked and hidden by the scent of his sweat. Hao thought it should probably be disgusting, how his hair dripped and how on his nape held droplets of sweat could be felt trickling from ends of his hair into Hao’s palms locked there. If it were anyone else, be it past lovers, Hao would make quick work of cleaning himself off, removing remnants of the others sweat from his body.

He sat there, atop damp thighs with his own come drying on his stomach, and relished in the contentment it brought to him instead. Because this was Hanbin, not someone else.
Hanbin finally lifted his head from where he rested his forehead upon Hao’s collar bone, hooded lids finding Hao’s with crossed eyes in an effort to keep him in focus from how close they were. To make it even harder, Hao didn’t withold his own desire to lean in just enough to rest their sweaty foreheads together.

“Are you alright?” Hanbin questioned, eyes shutting instead of putting any effort into keeping him in focus. Hao’s eyes followed suite as he lazily nodded his head, knowing Hanbin could feel it from where their foreheads were pressed together. “No pain?” Another shake of Hao’s head acted as his response. “You’re so amazing, gege.”

Hao couldn’t help the small snort of laughter that came out his nose in the form of quickly exhaled breath, “Best lay you’ve ever had?”

It was Hanbin’s turn to nod, a little too eagerly as their heads knocked together from the effort of it.

“Good,” Hao hummed, dumbly pleased by the answer. “Maybe I can convince you to come visit again, since you enjoyed it so much.”

He could feel the hot breathy exhale of Hanbin’s laugh against his lips, “Are you offering a discount for next time?”

“Do I need to?” Hao quizzed playfully, “Wasn’t the first round convincing enough that you’d happily pay full for my services?”

Hanbin’s hum sounded like he was contemplating. Hao knew the answer, could tell by the way he was held and all the sweet words that were pressed into his skin during the entirety of their first time together; as tightly wrapped as Hanbin had Hao around his finger it was equally, if not more suffocatingly tight for Hanbin on Hao’s finger.
Still, would it be Hanbin if he did not return Hao’s teasing with his own. “A discount always sweetens the deal.”

“Maybe I just have to demonstrate what you’ll get next time again?” Even as his body protested, his hole throbbing painfully from the constant fullness still present and his thighs burning from the exertion of riding him, he still managed to circle his hips.

He barely had time to process the uncomfortable sensitive pleasure that came with his own movements before Hanbin’s own whine was heard, the press of his forehead soon removed. Hao opened his eyes in curiosity, Hanbin’s head lolled back and his face was contorted, overwhelmed by the heat and movement around his overly sensitive cock.
“Hyung,” Hanbin’s voice sounded like a cry, which only energized Hao once more to grind his hips again, earning another choked whine. “You’re going to kill me.”

Hao giggled happily when, despite his words, the arms still holding his waist tightened, barely contained self-constraint because logically, both knew they weren’t ready for a second round. Instead of initiating anything further, Hao leaned his weight into Hanbin’s chest knocking him off balance so his back came crashing down onto the bed, Hao falling on his chest.

Tucking his arms beneath his chest, forearms pressed into Hanbin’s chest, Hao gazed down at him, admiring the way his hair splayed across his comforter in sweaty clusters. Where the blush that always coloured his cheeks bled down his neck and spread across his chest. Where his lips were bitten red, similarly coloured to Hao’s, from all the kissing they had done, seemingly making up for times lost when Hao reluctantly held himself back.

Without the need to hold himself back anymore, Hao rocked his body just enough to steal a small kiss from Hanbin’s lips, “I’ll resurrect you.”

Hanbin looked up at him, a barely contained smile curling the corners of his lips after a small kiss was stolen from unsuspecting lips. “Maybe the demo doesn’t sound too bad then.”

After a moment of lazy, purposeless kisses the two did eventually find themselves recovered enough to do another round. Laying with Hanbin beneath him, Hao cradled the back of Hanbin’s head in his palms as he lazily rode him until they both were reaching their second orgasm for the night.

---

Rummaging through drawers, with only the help of Hao’s voice where he still laid on the bed, Hanbin found a pair of pyjama pants in his drawer. Hao watched him from the bed as he slipped them on, the same ones that he had once offered to him when he stayed on his couch. Barely containing a small laugh as he thought back to that night, where he had confirmed everything he was feeling. To now, where Hanbin wore it because those feelings were very, very much reciprocated.

A small warm wet towel was retrieved from the bathroom, and Hanbin took his time with tentative slow hands cleaning off Hao’s stomach. Fingers even gentler as he wiped over Hao’s hole, collecting the come that leaked out of it.

When everything was clean enough, both vowing to take a shower tomorrow as Hao stubbornly refused to leave his sheets (it would be redundant anyways since the sheets were in desperate need to be changed now), Hanbin flickered off the light and in the sudden plunge of darkness, climbed into Hao’s bed.

It felt natural when Hanbin took the space closest to the door on his bed; felt even more fitting when Hao turned towards the wall and felt an arm wrap around his chest and tug him back against a warm chest. Sighing contently as Hanbin’s knees tucked into the bends of his own, their bodies slotting together so there was barely any room between them, sharing a single pillow though Hao had plenty on his bed.

The silence and the sound of Hanbin’s steadily deepening breathing accompanying it was soothingly. Beneath the stream of moonlight the peaked through his open curtains, Hao breathed out a contented sigh of comfort. The sigh also acting as a way for him to dispel some of the pent up lingering excitement that still had his heart happily, idiotically rabbiting in his chest. Because now behind him laid a man, who was everything he had ever wanted, with strong arms that held him so incredibly tightly, securing him in a place that felt so sickeningly safe and loving.

In an effort to further diffuse the excitement that clogged is chest so that he might be able to fall asleep hopefully within the next hour, Hao’s arms stretched out in front of him. Under the disguise of stretching out his muscles, Hao reached in front of him and shook his fingers, trying to dispel his giddiness through movement.
While it had worked, he could feel the tightness in his chest slightly wane, he had also stumbled upon something long forgotten about. Beneath the blue light of the moon, he caught a glimpse of dark foreign strokes of ink on the palm of his outstretched hand.

Turning it upwards to catch more of the light, he could make out the silly presses of the felt point marker that Hanbin had left there Something he had not checked prior to being interrupted by the cleaners and which had been long forgotten about when his mind and body were whisked elsewhere.

The lines drawn were slightly smudged from sweat and spit, but still coherent enough that Hao could idly outline the messy strokes. Many followed the natural lines of his palm, others trailed off and did uneven loops.

“You made such a mess,” Hao murmured, mostly to himself as he took Hanbin’s silence since settling into bed as him drifting off to mindless sleep.

There was a sudden stir from behind him that indicated Hao was wrong, the arm wrapped around Hao’s chest tightening, holding him closer like there was any possible way to do so. “I’ll clean your sheets tomorrow,” Hanbin offers noncommittally.

“I meant on my hand,” Hao lets out a short laugh, head shaking as he tilted his hand this way and that way to allow the moons light to show him more of Hanbin’s artwork. “I know art is meant to be subjective. But this is just — a mess.”

Another shift. In his peripheral Hao could see a mess of black hair lift from the pillow, Hanbin peaking over his shoulder to catch a glimpse of what he was talking about — the artwork he had diligently worked on earlier in the night also long forgotten.

“I don’t think it looks too bad.”

“It’s just scribbles.”

“I’ll admit I may have taken some artistic liberties by the end, but the start was incredibly solid,” The weight of Hanbin’s cheek is felt pressing against his own as Hanbin hooks his chin over Hao’s shoulder, bringing himself ever closer so he could peer at the hand, catch glimpses of the messy pink lines. “There is a much deeper hidden meaning to that piece, if you just looked closer.”

In an effort to do as instructed, to understand Hanbin’s artistic design, Hao brought his hand closer to his face, examining its lines through squinted eyes. It was hard to make out anything with darkness shadowing every part the moon could not touch. Even when Hao thought he might be able to look at it and convince himself to feel moved as one should while looking at artwork, he resigned, “Still scribbles.”

The arm that held Hao close suddenly reached out, closing the distance between their hands so Hanbin could press a single pointer finger to the very centre of Hao’s palm. He felt a shape traced into his skin but couldn’t make out what it was with only touch alone.

“Once more,” Hao instructed once Hanbin’s finger stopped its movement. Obediently, Hanbin’s finger begun to trace once more. When it finished, it begun again. Circling through the movements slowly until it begun to burn into Hao’s skin with every drag of his trimmed nail. Hao’s brows burrowed after the fifth outline, “A heart?”

Hanbin hummed delightfully, pointer finger prodding at where Hao assumes a hidden heart was drawn beneath the scribbles.

“And what does this mystifying hidden heart piece mean to you, artist Sung?” Hao played along, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as he bit around a blooming smile.
“Hidden love, of course,” Hanbin’s tone is slightly posh, with an air of importance that an artist of notable stature might have when asked about their newest piece. Now, in his normal tone, he continued, “I was going to leave it at a simple heart. But boredom struck and alas, so did inspiration.”

“Who knew you could be so creative.” Hao teases, using his free hand to grab Hanbin’s finger away so he could get one last look at where he had been pointing upon his palm. Even with his best efforts he could still barely make out a small pink heart, and even then he thinks he had just convinced himself of its existence. If it had ever been there, it had long been swallowed by lines or washed away or smudged from tonights happenings.

“Only when I’ve got a good muse.” Hanbin hummed, his head titling so he could press lazy kisses to the cheek he was squashing with his own. Hao preened under the attention, cheeks balling as he smiled and eyes turning to crescents making it hard to look for anything amongst his palm.

“Confessing love after our first time? Who knew you’d be so tactless.”

“Assuming you are the muse, how embarrassing.” Hanbin quips, squishing Hao’s cheek with his own once more after he is contented with all the peppered kisses he left behind, sealing them there with the press of his warm skin. “Ahrin was also present and I do love kids.”

Hao should feel slighted, maybe even appalled at how easily he always lost his footing when talking with Hanbin. Whenever he thought he was a step ahead of him, Hanbin had already considered every response and planned his own retaliation. It should become old, how often he lost. Hao found himself smiling even harder, adoring all the ways their conversations always challenged him.

“Have you thought about having kids?” Hao asks, trying to keep his voice casual. Like he didn’t juggle the question around in his mind since he watched Hanbin interact with Ahrin earlier that night. Trying to find the best way to ask without seeming like he was too interested in mentally planning a future — kids or not.

He felt Hanbin’s cheek drag against his own as he nodded his confirmation, “I want three daughters.”

Hao’s laugh came out like a little scoff, “You’ve got all the specifics decided then.”

“Since I was young,” Hanbin confirms, his fingers finding its place amongst the mess of scribbles on Hao’s palm once more. Hao watched as it traced the accidental line that reached the very edge of one of his fingers, before Hanbin was skillfully, easily slotting their fingers together. Hao closed his eyes, smiling contently as their palms pressed together. “Have you ever thought of kids?”

“Not to that extent,” Hao admits, letting his arm go placid so it could easily be drawn up to his chest when Hanbin guides their intertwined hands there, arm tightly wrapping across his chest once more. “I guess three daughters doesn’t sound too bad.”

When the weight of Hanbin’s head suddenly lifted, Hao opened his eyes and turned his head to see where he had retreated to, only barely tampering down a gasp when he came face to face with glittering eyes. Hao thought he was becoming an expert at reading every single emotion that Hanbin’s eyes held. Yet, this look of such open, unfiltered adoration held something so deeply unreadable at its very core it made Hao slightly flustered being subjected to it so close up.

Holding his ground, absorbed in keeping his gaze, Hao didn’t back down or turn away no matter how badly he wished to squirm beneath his stare. Even when the corners of Hanbin’s lips turned and whiskers streaked his cheek — barely noticeable in the darkness but still caught by Hao’s trained eyes — Hao kept his confident, unwavering stare.

“That sounds a lot more like a love confession.” Hanbin’s voice was just above a murmur, the smug tone to his voice not going unnoticed.

Gulping, Hao mimicked Hanbin’s smug smile as best he could, “Sounds like something you’d want your muse to confess, hm artist Sung?”

Teasing words escaped them when Hanbin surged forward to press his lips to Hao’s, nothing more than a gentle, closed lipped kiss. It was everything their stubborn, silly mouths would not say.

---

 

The morning after, Hao stumbled into the kitchen, wearing the pyjama pants Hanbin had dutifully dressed him in after he had cleaned him up. Hao giggled and told him it wasn’t necessary but Hanbin insisted, and so — being a people pleaser and everything — Hao laid placidly and allowed Hanbin to dress him.

There in the kitchen, leaned Taerae, a mug of steaming coffee held between his two hands, the rim just shy of his lips as he watched Hao through the steam. He was already dressed in casual attire, a polo shirt properly tucked into his pyjama pants because no one would see below his waist if he was whisked into an online meeting.

Regarding Taerae groggily as he padded into the kitchen, Hao scrubbed at his belly as he looked into the coffee pot to see if there was enough for two other mugs. When he deemed it enough, content enough with having a smaller glass if it meant giving Hanbin the fuller cup, Hao reached for the cabinet and pulled out two mugs, setting them onto the counter.

“Must be thirsty today… Two coffees?”

Hao looked at him, his expression unreadably neutral which gave him a false sense of pride. Thinking that perhaps they had been quiet enough that night that even though their walls were thin as paper Taerae had awoken in the morning none the wiser of what conspired.

“Hanbin stayed the night,” Hao offered innocently, allowing Taerae to draw his own conclusions. Almost like it was cued, there were suddenly noises of dragged slipper clad feet across the hallway floor, soon after accompanied by the click of what Hao could only assume was the bathroom door. Hanbin having just now rolled out of bed after Hao managed to pull himself out of his arms minutes prior, rounds of kisses acting as payment for his freedom.

His misplaced confidence in his own abilities to be quiet in bed were quickly shattered.

“Oh I know,” Taerae mused, sipping on his coffee while still staring at Hao with an amused, unreadable look. Hao looked at him for a moment before dragging his eyes back down to the mugs, focusing on them as he filled them with coffee, “Congratulations, by the way.”

Hao thought maybe he shouldn’t ask; whatever he was congratulating him for was definitely going to be humiliating. Curiosity got the better of him as he found himself inquiring despite his better judgement, “For?”

“Ending that dry spell.” Taerae hummed, the first sign of his amusement coming up as bubbled laughter as he watched Hao’s pour become unsteady, the coffee missing the rim of the mug and pooling on the counter.

“Thank you,” Hao bit out once he placed the coffee pot down in favour of collecting some paper towel to clean up his mess. “It also was not a dry spell. That insinuates that it was out of my control. I was very much in control of it.”

When Hao pointedly looked over at him, Taerae simply nodded along as he took another sip from his coffee. Lowering the steaming mug down, he smiled at his roommate, the dimple in his cheek mocking with how unconvinced he was.

Sighing, Hao turned back to his mugs because what use was it to argue with his roommate about such trivial things. Especially when he had the best sex of his life yesterday. So dry spell or not (it was not), Hao had overcome it.

“You guys have sex so passionately,” Taerae continued unprompted. Hao is grateful he had put the mug back down on the counter after wiping up the spill beneath it because he thinks he might have dropped and shattered the ceramic if not. “I’ve never, ever heard you so whiney.”

“You’re a freak for listening!”

“I wasn’t listening! Not intentionally, anyways.” Taerae smiled, contented with being able to tease him so easily without anything being thrown back at him — a very, very rare win for him. “It’s hard not to when you guys were so loud.”

Like it was an after thought, only a small beat of silence passing before Taerae was continuing, “I didn’t know he called you gege”

Hao was at his wits end with the teasing. He kicked out, hopeful that even with the distance he would be able to connect his foot with at least Taerae’s shin. But the smaller boy was nimble in his movements, maybe already calculating the reaction Hao would have, slithering out of Hao’s reach, giggling as he went to the living room.

“Oh! Good morning, we were just talking about you!” Taerae greeted through his giggles as he continued to the couch where his work laptop was left open, forgotten about to instead poke fun at Hao.

Hanbin turned the corner, a large, toothy smile on his face from Taerae’s bright welcoming before he turned to look into the kitchen. The smile faltered slightly, becoming lopsided with sympathy as he silently pieces together Taerae’s glee when he comes upon Hao’s disgruntled stance.

“I am killing Ricky when I see him next.”

---

 

It’s been a few months since that night. From Hanbin visiting his home and staying in his bed for the first time to barely ever spending a night alone. He has seen Gyuvin more times over the last few months than he ever has while working along side Ricky for years. If Hanbin wasn’t suggesting they stay at his apartment for the night when he came to routinely come and pick him up from work, then it was Hao inviting him over to his.

It went from packing a bag to shove into his locker at work just incase to Hanbin clearing out a drawer in his dresser. Mainly a place for him to store his pyjama pants (the hamster set quickly swiped from Hanbin’s own collection for Hao’s personal use) and various different choices of day clothing for days Hao decided to go directly to work from Hanbin’s — which was most mornings, as it meant sharing his train ride with Hanbin.

The way their lives quickly intertwined themselves was so effortless.

Their friend group was already practically made of the same people, the only thing that noticeably shifted was now Matthew and Gyuvin made frequent appearances during their nightly dinner runs.

Hao even once convinced Taerae to leave the house past his preferred sleeping time to join them, pestering him with frequent text messages and phone calls until the younger boy exasperatedly agreed. Hao half expected him to flake at the last moment, but when he left his studio that night, there was a slightly grumpy Taerae bundled in a sweater and jacket.

Displeasure was quick to dissipate when they got to eating. If Hao made a comment that he had become just slightly more lively when he found himself talking with Matthew all he would receive was a knock to the shin and a pointed glare through thick rimmed glasses.

It was effortless in the way that during Hao’s weekly calls with Yujin, his younger brother would always ask where Hanbin was before he ever asked about Hao’s own day. Sometimes, Hanbin would take over holding the phone and Hao was left to his own devices, the conversation between the two hard to wedge himself into. Not that he minded really, sitting idly to the side and admiring his two favourite people was good enough for him.

It was so scarily effortless, that Hao began to question how he had lived all those years without Hanbin; without someone caring for him just because it was something they wished to do, or someone that silently help him with things when he could see Hao silently struggling. This existence became so much less strenuous with Hanbin beside him.
So when he received a call from his mother, asking him if he had any free time to come and visit her since it had been so long, it was a hard thing to agree too. Hao felt a little silly for ever considering turning his mothers offer down especially when he really did miss her. He felt even more silly thinking that two days away from Hanbin would be the absolute worst thing to ever be subjected to.

When he voiced that to Hanbin, as dramatically as his brain phrased it, Hanbin laughed boisterously, “It’ll only be for a weekend!”

From where he sat on the floor of his room packing his overnight bag for tomorrows trip back home, Hao glared up at Hanbin where he was lounging across his unmade bed. “So you’re saying you wont miss me even if it is only two days?”

Hanbin’s laughter came to a bubbling finish, the amused smile never leaving his lips as he looks at his sulking boyfriend stuffing shirts into his duffle bag. With a small grunt, Hanbin pushes himself from the bed and pads over to where Hao’s sitting, lowering down into a crouch.

Watching him silently, Hanbin begun to pull the crumbled shirt from where Hao had just thoughtless shoved it. Nimble fingers begun to fold it, “Should I instead be begging you not to go?”

A small grateful smile began to pull up Hao’s lips as he watched Hanbin’s fingers dutifully fold his shirt, ironing out the wrinkles of its surface fabric before placing it down onto the floor. Wordlessly, he begun to pick through the pile of clothing Hao pulled from his closet to pack for his visit, quickly folding the next shirt.

It was unspoken care, something done without a second thought. Something Hao has come to know to be one of Hanbin’s love languages. Though they have never told each other that they loved each other, Hao felt it in every small act of kindness Hanbin did for him. Whether it was waking up just a couple minutes earlier to prepare him his coffee for the day or simply placing food on Hao’s plate before his own, Hao felt his love.

Nodding enthusiastically, Hao responded, “Yes! Absolutely!”

Humming in acknowledgement, Hanbin turned to look back down at the shirts he had folded, all stacked in a neat pile. Once shirts were completed, he wasted no time turning to the jeans, beginning to fold those as well. “Would you listen then? If I told you being apart was too troublesome, would you stay?”

Hao watched Hanbin’s hands as he thought. The train ticket wasn’t exactly refundable since it was less than a day before the trip, that would complicate things. Not being able to see his mother after so long also wouldn’t be favourable. Still — “If you begged well enough, maybe I’d consider it.”

Laughing, Hanbin lifted his head, hands stilling on the denim jeans he had just finished folding. “Is that how it is?”

Hao met his gaze and nodded, jokingly petulant, his nose slightly upturned as he awaited Hanbin to play along, waited for him to plea for his company.

He never disappointed, “Oh, dearest Hao-hyung! How would I survive these two days without you here? Don’t go! I couldn’t bear the distance!” Hanbin’s tone was playfully animated, a poshness to his tone that could be found in dramatic retellings of plays on stages.

Hao giggled from the performance, hand reaching out to gently knock at Hanbin’s shoulder, which had the younger man teetering on his heel to keep his balance, laughing all the while.

“I will miss you though,” The playfulness in his voice was suddenly dulled, hands continuing their movements as the put aside the folded jeans and take up the next pair, like they were an excuse to busy his hands while speaking. “It’ll be the longest we’ve been apart.”

Considering his words carefully, Hao let out a small noise of acknowledgement as he came to the realization that it was true. The only time significant amount of time they spend apart was during the hours that they worked separately; and even then, they were texting at any available time.

After that, all their free time was spent together. Whether it was alone or in the company of their friends, in some aspect they were spending their time together. Majority of the time they were glued to each others side. Where Hanbin was Hao was beside him; where Hao was Hanbin would be soon to follow.

After a moment of silently thinking every moment of the last few months over, Hao questioned, “Do you think we’re insufferable?”

“Oh, most definitely.” Hanbin agreed easily, with a resolute single nod of his head as he finished off the small pile of clothing; once a mess on one side of Hao’s hip now sat on the other side, neatly piled. Retreating his hands so he could rest them over the bend of his knee, Hanbin looked up at Hao, “If any of the others knew we were even having a conversation like this, they would most definitely tease us until our hair was grey. Especially Ricky.”

“Especially Ricky,” Hao mimicked his agreement, inwardly groaning at the mere idea of Ricky ever hearing any of their conversations in private.

It was bad enough when the topic of how they met came up and the truth of Hao’s first appointment was mentioned — thank you Kuanjui. Both Ricky and Gyuvin’s jaws dropped in unison, completely taken back that everyone at the table was in on this little secret for so long and held such crucial embarrassing information away from them.

Hao thinks he might never live their first meeting down, not when Ricky was right there to remind him. It was less embarrassing now, the aftershock of the story being brought up frequently losing its surprise factor. It also was the entire reason he was here with Hanbin today, so maybe it was time to accept that he came on someones table when they first met.

Maybe not today, but one day definitely.

Hopefully.

“His bullying got much worse after he got together with Gyuvin,” Hao continued his commentary, nodding his head definitely once Hanbin raised his brows in question, “I mean — he’s always been pretty bad. But the frequency and boldness definitely got worse after he got with Gyuvin.”

“Are you sure all fault is on Gyuvin?” It was Hao’s turn to raise a brow. Hanbin only pointedly look at him, making it known he was definitely talking about him. Just to confirm the accusation, Hao’s hand rose, finger pointed to the centre of his chest, silently asking ‘me?!’. Hanbin doubled down with a smug smile and a nod, “You and Kuanjui aren’t really the easiest duo to be around, you’ve got to toughen your skin.”

Hao scoffed like it was the most ludicrous thing he’s ever been told. “Me and Kuanjui are not that bad. We’re actually very good, kind friends to have.”

Hanbin’s head teetered from side to side like he was bouncing the idea around, though the playful glint in his eyes was proof enough that he wasn’t even considering the truth behind Hao’s words. “Definitely forced Ricky to start fighting back.”

The finger that was pressed to his chest quickly turned around to point accusingly directly between Hanbin’s brows, his eyes crossing in an effort to look at the sudden finger pointing in his direction. “Don’t act like you’re faultless in this.”

It was Hanbin’s turn to scoff incredulously, “Me?!”

Hao had to snuff out the laughter choking his throat at the way Hanbin’s face contorted with his shock when the blame was somehow redirected towards him. Managing his face so it didn’t crack under his amusement, Hao narrowed his eyes, “If you didn’t give him so much to work with, he wouldn’t tease us so much.”

“Oh its a crime to dote on my boyfriend now?”

Unlike before, where he just barely managed to school his expression, Hao was unable to stop the colouring of his cheeks. There was something so embarrassingly pleasing to hear Hanbin call him his boyfriend. Obviously, thats what they were. Though they’ve never officially asked each other out, everything happened so gradually that it was just normal to begin referring to Hanbin as his boyfriend.

Still, after months of dating, Hao still blushed whenever Hanbin used that name for him.

Clearing his throat, a little too loudly with their proximity in the large room, Hao shook his pointing finger in Hanbin, “A crime punishable by death!”

Hanbin laughed boisterously, rocking his body forward so he could fall to his knees atop the empty duffel bag between them. Closing the space between their faces, Hanbin rested his hands atop Hao’s knees as he leaned forward. “I’ve no desire to stop though.”

In an act of detaining him, Hao’s arms raised to wrap themselves around Hanbins neck, tightly reeling him in until the tips of their noses were just barely brushing, “Then I’ve no choice but to detain you, criminal.”

When Hanbin’s hands left his knees to instead wrap around his waist, the sudden shift of his weight pushed Hao back onto the floor, Hanbin quickly following him down. Where the fall should have been accompanied by the weight of Hanbin’s body crashing into his own there was nothing, Hanbin bracing himself on his knees to withhold the majority of his weight even while resting his chest upon Hao’s.

“You’ve caught me,” Hanbin sings, rubbing the tip of his nose affectionately against Hao’s, “What are you gunna do with me, officer?”

Unwrapping one arm from locking around Hanbin’s neck, he gently placed it against the back of his head, fingers brushing through black hair as he practically devoured him with his gaze, “Could think of a couple things.”

Neither were sure who moved first, maybe they both moved at the same time, but their lips were meeting in a chaste kiss. Just gentle, passionate pressing of lips to seal all the teasing they’ve done and worked themselves up with.

When Hanbin moved away first, Hao could have audibly sighed at the loss. “You should sleep earlier today though. Your train is early tomorrow.”

This time Hao did actually sigh. Because he really shouldn’t have booked such an early train, the excitement of seeing his mother clouding his judgement in the moment that he booked them. Because his early departure meant Hanbin would be responsible and be able to restrain himself even if Hao tried to initiate anything.

“Lets get washed up,” Hanbin continued to insist, though he made no effort to lift from where he laid ontop of Hao, his arms still snuggly tucked between the floor and Hao’s back.

“Will you bathe with me?” Hanbin raised his brow at him, wondering if it was a ploy just to get him to somehow lower his guard so Hao could get his way. Innocently, Hao pouted out his lower lip, “No funny business, just bathe with me.”

“Anything you want.”

In the end, Hao did get his way.

---

 

As much as Hao assured him that he could make it to the train alone so Hanbin wouldn’t be bothered with waking up so early, Hanbin still insisted on travelling there with him. If not to make sure that he gets there safely, than to prolong the time they had together — goodbyes left until the very last second instead of at the entryway of his apartment.
Which in the end, Hao was very grateful for. Not only because Hanbin had been the one to wake him up, making sure that he didn’t sleep through alarms and miss his train, but also just having him along for the short journey over to the train station was nice in itself.

When they made it to the gates, Hao was spun on the spot to face Hanbin, his warm hands coming to rest on the tops of his shoulders, “Did you remember to pack everything?”
“It’s only a two day trip,” Hao affectionately rolled his eyes at the question, one that he has been asked multiple times that morning and even once before they had dozed off to sleep. “If I’ve forgotten anything I’m sure my mom has extras. Or I can even go buy a spare. I’ll be fine.”

Hanbin smiled at him, nothing but warmth found in the slight creases by his mouth. His eyes were soft as they flickered over every part of Hao’s face, like he was memorizing how he looked in this exact memory to compare it to when he came back.

Hao thinks maybe he should tease him for how he’s acting like this is some trip to a foreign country, oceans away that would prevent them from talking regularly or seeing each other for weeks — from the way he was looking, maybe even months. Except it wasn’t. By bullet train it would take him approximately four hours to get to his home town outside of the city, nothing significant at all.

So he probably could have teased him. But he didn’t. Because stupidly, he shared the same sentiment. His hands coming up to circle Hanbin’s wrists where they still rested near his shoulder, a comforting smile curling his lips.

“I’ll text you when I get there.”

“Call.” Hanbin urged instead.

Hao stared at him incredulously because he could see the dark shadow of exhaustion under his eyes — all thanks to Hao getting his way last night and them having to wake up early the next morning. He knew that Hanbin will make it home and fall asleep, probably forgetting all about the call he now demands.

But still, his grip on his shoulders squeezes and his eyes are set with determination so Hao resigns, nodding. “I’ll call.”

Hanbin’s hands slip around his neck, Hao’s own hands finding Hanbin’s hips once hes pulled into a tight hug. When they pull back, sweet smiles mirrored on their lips, Hanbin is the first to steal a small peck.

“I’ll see you in two days,” Hanbin murmurs against his lips before sealing that promise with another press of his lips.

When they finally pull back from the kiss, Hao nods, “Two days.”

They lingered like they amongst the sparse group of other people awaiting the train, until the gates were opening and the line was beginning to thin as people began shuffling through, presenting their tickets.

Taking one more kiss for the road, Hao wiggled his way out of Hanbin’s hold before turning towards the gate and falling into line.

When he had finally settled into his seat, duffle bag taking up the space of the seat beside him, Hao begun feeling the buzz of his phone where it was tucked in his jacket pocket.

[6:34am] Hanbin: Have you made it safely?
[6:35am] Hanbin: I put some snacks in your bag this morning, incase you feel hungry during the trip.
[6:35am] Hanbin: Call me when you get there~

---

The next time Hao woke up, he was four hours out of the city, in his small hometown. He quickly shot off a text to Hanbin, letting him know he’s arrived and promising to call once he’s at his mother’s house. He didn’t let the phone linger in his hand longer than necessary, already aware it will probably go unread for a good while as Hanbin slept.
It didn’t take him long to find his mother amongst the crowd, as she begun waving her hands above her head in excitement the moment he walked through the gates and became visible. Jogging over to where he stood, he was pulled into a tight welcoming hug the moment he was in arms reach.

When Hao begun to pull away from the hug, his mothers hands dragged to rest atop his shoulders, keeping him close even after their bodies parted. When he was far enough to see her face, a smile pulled at his lips instinctually as he looks over her features — all familiar and known like the back of his hand but different in the way age has pressed wrinkles in spots emotion frequently creased, like the spot between her brows or the smile lines around her thin lips.

“You look so healthy,” When she smiled, accentuating the wrinkles around her lips, Hao’s own smile mimicked it’s wide turn. “Have you been taking care of yourself?”

Hao thought of Hanbin the moment his mother poised that question. Thought about how in places he lacked taking care of himself, Hanbin would make up for it. How he has never felt so carefree and loved ever in his life until Hanbin came along and filled the hole that was shaped like him — something he was unaware of until his presence became something that was non-negotiable.

A cold hand pressed to his cheek bringing him back from his thoughts, his eyes flickering down to glance at his mothers hand that now touched upon his cheek. When he finally glanced back up at her, the excitement of seeing her son had morphed into something sweetly soft, something knowing. Like she could read every minuscule change of his demeanor that started when she asked the question and the image of Hanbin flashed behind his eyes.

Touching his own cheek, Hao wondered if his thoughts leaked out to betray him as a blush on his cheeks. There was no excessive warmth there that would indicate any change. Perhaps its just a mothers trained eye to know their son’s feelings.

“Yujin told me a lot about him already,” His mother wistfully supplied. Hao had mentioned him before, when he had called her a while ago, but he didn’t provide too much information. As sure of Hanbin as he was, he still had his reservations about getting too ahead of himself and introducing him to his mother.

“That little traitor,” Hao scoffed, wondering to himself how much Yujin had provided to fill in the gaps that Hao had purposefully left.

“Don’t blame him too much. I was the one that pried until he gave me answers.” His mother giggled, pinching at his cheek before both hands were pulling away. Instead, she found a spot by his side and looped their arms together so they could start making their way back to her car. “Can’t help but notice you didn’t bring him home, was he busy?”
Adjusting the strap of his bag that dug into his shoulder, the two began to walk to the exit. “I thought you wanted to see me when you insisted I come home for a weekend?”

“Of course, I’m happy to see my eldest,” She sighed, tilting her head so she could rest her temple against the outside of Hao’s upper arm as they walked, “Meeting my son-in-law is also important though.”

Hao choked on his breath, gently rocking into his mothers body to nudge her in disbelief. Which only earned him a motherly giggle as she rocked on her feet from the sudden press of his bodies weight.

“He wasn’t busy,” Hao finally supplies that information, doubling back to the previous question to completely avoid the way she address him. “I just thought it might be a bit much to bring him back the first time I’m visiting home in awhile.”

“Shame,” His mother sighs beside him. When Hao looks down to see her expression, there is a slight downturn to her lips. “I could have really used the extra hands for preparing my pickled radish…”

“I’m here? I can help you out in the kitchen?”

“Oh honey,” His mother sighed wistfully, lifting her head from his shoulder to stare at him, something pitiful in his mothers gaze with the way she regarded him, “It’s more of a liability than actual help when you’re in the kitchen.”

If there was any lingering awkwardness that comes with not seeing someone after so long, no matter how close you are to them, it had definitely dissipated. Their laughter much too loud in the small train station, though there weren’t too many people around that they should be more mindful of so they didn’t make any effort to muffle it.

---

 

The day was filled with everything and nothing all at the same time. When they were not driving into the small centre of the town to pick up ingredients for his mothers meals or preparation for the pickled radishes that she planned to make this weekend, then they were walking around his childhood home, talking about everything small.

At some point, unsurprisingly, his mother brought Hanbin back into the conversation. Prying him with questions he could not avoid as they walked through the small garden his mother had in the back. There was still lingering coolness in the air in the morning, but by afternoon the sun was shining and warming the earths surface. So they walked amongst the greenery, sprouts of colourful flowers around them and buds of growing vegetables as Hao told her about Hanbin.

They had lapped around the garden several times, stopping under trees to admire the birds nesting in the high branches and stopping on the very old, unsteady wooden bench hidden amongst growing vines that his father had put there, all of their initials carved into its rotting wood from years ago. Memorializing the family that lived and grew there.
They talked until the warmth of the afternoon was giving way to the start of dusk, the sun hiding over the horizon, colouring the sky in purples and oranges as its final goodbye.
When night fell and they finally separated to their own rooms, Hao made his way into his childhood room. It was left the exact way he remembered it to be, the walls painted a deep navy blue with dusty old star stickers still stubbornly sticking to the ceiling. On each side of the room were two single beds, one was Yujin’s and the other his, as they had been designated to share a room with each other well into their teens as the house only had two rooms.

He dropped onto his bed, the smell of familiar laundry detergent filling his nose as he lays into the softness of his childhood blankets, probably recently washed in expectation for his arrival. He stared up stars on his ceiling for a second, allowing himself to listen to the natural creak of their house before he was shuffling to pull his phone from his pocket.

He found Hanbin’s contact quickly, fingers trained to search for him first in any situation, and quickly pressed the video call button. It rung several times before the picture he had put as Hanbin’s contact was giving way to the real thing — slightly dishevelled black hair a contrast against white bed sheets as he laid beneath blankets, a slight sleepiness still noticeable in his gaze even through the pixels of his screen.

A smile of adoration crossed his lips as he took in the state of his boyfriend, “Did I wake you?”

“No,” Hanbin’s voice was thick with sleep even despite his answer, an indication that even if he wasn’t properly asleep he was definitely on the verge, “How was your first day? How’s your mother?”

Hao recounted his day in detail, even the smallest parts that were insignificant he rattled off. Mostly because he couldn’t help talking a little too much when it was Hanbin on the other end, knowing that he will always listen with utmost interest not matter how small the story might appear to others. And he did just that, nodding along and asking questions where necessary as Hao described the most mundane retelling of his day returning back to a town he grew up in.

“It sounds like you had a good day baby, I’m happy.”

“Mn… I did. It’s good to come home,” Hao confirms with a wistful sigh, “But I think my mother likes you more than she likes her own son.”

Hanbin’s sharp laugh was static riddled as it came from his speaker, Hao still found himself smiling along as the sound of his laughter always encouraged him to do. Adjusting his body, Hao kicked off his slippers and slipped himself beneath his blankets, turning on his side and resting the hand holding the phone on the pillow in front of him. Laying like this, with Hanbin also laying similarly on the small rectangle screen of his phone, it almost felt like they were laying together. If the lack of warmth wasn’t so evident, Hao could almost convince himself that this was enough.

“That cant possibly be true!”

“No, really!” Hao insists with urgency in his voice, “She asked about you the moment I got there. And without fail, brought you up throughout the day. Mentioning how nice it would be to meet you.” Purposefully, Hao left out the part where his mother called Hanbin ‘son-in-law’.

“Sounds like I should have come with you.” Hanbin laughs and something shifts inside of Hao, watching as Hanbin settles further into the blankets in his own apartment, miles away from him. With his duvet balled in his fist and tucked beneath his chin to reserve his heat beneath.

Hao missed it, felt cold even while beneath his own duvet suddenly. Felt the emptiness in his arms since he had nothing to hold onto for the night, or the lack of a sturdy chest pressed to his back as he was being held. Everything was much colder without the presence of Hanbin. Even if he enjoyed his day with his mother, he thought on multiple occasions that it would have been much better if Hanbin were there beside him experiencing it with him as well.

After a moment, Hao pulled his courage forward and spoke, “Maybe you should.”

Hanbins eyes, which have been drowsily slow blinking the entire time they spoke barely teetering on consciousness, suddenly shot open and stared so pointedly at where Hao continued to lay, schooling his face into indifference like he didn’t just suggest Hanbin travel out of the city to see him. To meet his mother for the first time.

“Should I?” Hanbin questions, eyes flickering over Hao’s own face through the screen of his phone. Hao watched as Hanbin shifted in his bed, the light illuminated from the phones screen changing, as he must have switched over to another app, eyes flickering over the screen.

“It might be a lot to ask—”

His sudden doubling back, like he was going to take back his offer because he didn’t want to burden Hanbin with his inability to be away from him for longer than a single night, was interrupted by static filled murmuring coming from the speaker of his phone, “The tickets are a little pricier since it’s last minute… But I could catch the ten am train… Get there mid afternoon…”

It almost felt like Hanbin was talking his plans through with himself, eyes still focused on another screen. Hao hid the satisfied smile in his duvet, pulling it further up so he could cover the bottom half of his face with it, eyes peaking over the top so he could still watch the determined set of Hanbin’s brows as he continued to browse options.
It was so silly, the co-dependency they both have seemingly developed with each other over such a short amount of time. It was silly that Hanbin immediately took action to look at the quickest available train to take him to where Hao currently was. It was sillier that Hao was so immediately sedated, pleased with Hanbin’s eagerness to come to him that it set off bumbling butterflies in his stomach.

Behind his duvets, Hao finally spoke, his voice slightly muffled, “Any time works… As long as you come.”

Hanbin hummed his acknowledgment, a small almost easily missed smile curling his lips as his eyes continued to read over a screen Hao could not see. Minutes of silence followed after, the sound of Hanbin’s movements ruffling his duvet the only thing that accompanied their breathing. Hao completely content with just laying there watching Hanbin.

After a moment, the light of the screen Hanbin was on dissipated, his features darkening as he pulls up the video call once more. “I booked it.”

Hao hummed, even with his lower half of his face covered the smile on his lips was evident in the way his eyes curved from the tops of his cheeks balling.

“Do you think that was a little insane of me to do?” Hanbin questions with a bashful smile on his lips, like the sudden realization of what he had just bought dawned on him. Like the eagerness of how quickly he was to pull up train tickets was something to be embarrassed about.

“Definitely.” Hao nodded his head shortly, pulling the blankets down to tuck below his chin so Hanbin could properly see the pleased smile on his lips even with his agreement. “What time does your train arrive?”

---

When Hao told his mother about Hanbin’s arrival that day, she insisted on driving with him to the train station. No matter how much he assured her it wasn’t necessary, that he could drive himself with her car, she was adamant about being there for his arrival.

The morning felt like it dragged on forever, with his mother recruiting him to held tidy up the house for Hanbin’s arrival being the only source of entertainment for him to pass the hours along. It should have worked, busying himself with sweeping the floor is time consuming enough. But constantly checking his phone for the time, or if there were any updates from Hanbin made every minute feel like an hour.

Time came, eventually, for them drive to the train station, his mother insisting they get there at least a half an hour before Hanbin’s set arrival time so he isn’t waiting for them. They made idle conversation as they waited for his arrival.

Not longer than a half hour after their arrival, Hao felt the buzz of his phone in his back pocket. Eagerly he fished it out, opening it up immediately to their text messages.

[2:23pm] Hanbin: I see you

Hao’s head snapped upwards, in the dispersing crowd coming from the train his eyes immediately found a mess of black hair amongst them all. A pretty toothy smile on his lips as he waved with his phone still held in his palm.

His mothers gaze must have followed his, a small gasp leaving her lips as they both, in unison, stand from where they were sitting on the bench, “Oh, he’s quite handsome isn’t he?”

Hao broke his eyes away from Hanbin to look down at his mother, laughing giddily at the shocked look on her face. When Hao looked back up, Hanbin had crossed the tiled floor to stand in front of them, smiling at Hao unabashedly bright before turning to politely bow to his mother.

“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” Hao has never heard Hanbin speak so politely in his life, only prompted to lift from his bow when his mother reached out to gently pat him on the outer part of both his upper arms.

“Please, there’s no need to be so formal,” His mother dismissed, returning his bright smile. One hand leaving Hanbin’s upper arm to instead rest upon Hao’s, the older boy raising a brow in question, “You’re part of the family now, anyways. So be comfortable.”

An embarrassed flush heated up his cheeks, the enthusiastic smile from seeing Hanbin faltering only slightly from his mother’s boldness. He glared at his mother, who paid him no mind, before looking at Hanbin. Searching his features for any discomfort for how quickly his mother moved.

He could understand if he was. Dating someone for only a couple of months, knowing each other for such a short time even prior to that, and then being greeted like that by his mother from the very first meeting could be burdensome.

Instead, impossibly so, Hanbin’s smile brightened, his whiskers streaking the tops of his cheeks so deeply Hao thought they might leave and permanent imprint on his skin.

An exhaled sigh after seeing Hanbin’s reaction dispelled all lingering anxiety. The inhale interrupted when Hanbin’s eyes finally flickered back to him, butterflies filling his stomach in anxieties empty place.

Instinctually, because Hanbin was close enough and he had missed him even if it had only been for a single night, Hao reached out to take Hanbin’s hand in his own; their fingers intertwining effortlessly.

“Come on, come on. We’ve got lots to do!” His mother began to urge, bringing down he palm in a smack on the shoulders she still held before she turned and began to lead them to the car she parked.

Startled, Hanbin turned to look at Hao with a silent question as they begun to walk a few steps behind his leading mother, their hands swinging between their bodies.

Hao huddles in close to his side, keeping his voice low so his mother might not overhear, “She’s been excited to show you around since I told her you’ll be coming this morning,” He informed, keeping his eyes on his mothers back before he over to meet Hanbin’s gaze, a small smile on his lips, “Bear with it. She’ll tire herself out eventually.”

Hanbin leaned into his side, his head tilting to tenderly knock their heads together before he was straightening out and dutifully following behind Hao’s mother. “I think you forget how willing I am to know everything about you. This will be fun.”

When they got to the car, his mother assigned Hanbin as her passenger. With only some complaints about it, Hao resigned with a grumble and got into the back seat alone. His complaints quelled when once they begun to drive, in the middle of holding a conversation with his mother, Hanbin’s hand blindly reached behind his seat, fingers wiggling as they awaited Hao’s hand to take his.

Their fingers intertwined, a gentle thumb rubbing over the back of Hao’s hand as he sat in the back; silently smiling to himself as he gazes out the window, contented enough listening to the two in the front converse.

His chest inflating with so much unspoken adoration with the way he once more effortlessly fit himself into Hao’s little life. Wooing his brother and now his mother, who laughed openly whenever Hanbin said something funny and smiled gratefully at him whenever Hanbin enthusiastically commented on all the silly stories of Hao’s childhood.

Hao thought he should probably be embarrassed. Especially when his mother took a slight detour into town to show where Hao had gone to school, the place where he had first broken his arm when he had slipped and fallen on wet grass during a downpour. Everything should be mortifying. But the hand gently squeezing his own whenever his mother derailed to a new story negated all embarrassment.

---

When they got home, Hao was only allowed a single moment of Hanbin’s time, when he showed him his childhood room so he could put his bag down, before his mother was requesting his presence. Asking him for assistance with pickling radish, convincing him with the promise that he could take some home with him after everything was finished.

Hoisting himself onto the counter behind where the two were busying themselves, Hao kicked his feet and absently picked through the bowl of grapes his mother had washed and set on the counter. A shuffled playlist was playing quietly over his mother’s radio, muffled background noise to the conversation the two were having as they chopped and prepared the brine.

When his mother went scurrying out of the room to grab the containers, Hanbin slipped the dirty gloves off his hands and turned to where Hao sat. Popping another grab into his mouth, pocketing it against his cheek, he reached out to beckon his boyfriend closer.

Obediently, Hanbin crossed the small kitchen, slotting himself between Hao’s open legs. Hao wound one arm loosely around Hanbin’s neck, the other hand plucking a grape from the vine and feeding it to Hanbin.

“I’d think you came here to see my mother at this rate.” Hao commented, putting one more grape in his mouth before he wrapped his second arm around Hanbin’s neck.

Hanbin chewed the grape offered to him diligently, savouring its sweetness, before he spoke, “Are my real intentions for coming too obvious?”

Hao screwed up his nose at that, “Embarrassingly so.”

Hanbin laughed, his hands leaving where they were resting upon the counter so they could soothe their open palms over the tops of Hao’s thighs, fingers gently flexing to squeeze at the flesh hidden beneath jeans. “Got to make a good first impression. It’s always good to have your parents blessings.”

“What would you ever need that for?”

The way Hanbin looked at him made his stomach turn, his body prickling with tingles from the sudden pent up emotion swelling in the very pit of his stomach. He would never get use to the way Hanbin sometimes regarded him, with so much adoration and tenderness that it could melt him into a pathetic puddle.

“My three daughters will not be bastards.”

Hao’s head dropped back in a loud laugh, completely taken aback by the wording. When the laughter subsided enough for him to steady his head again, Hanbin’s eyes shone with a newfound amusement. “Bit of a round about way to say you want to marry someone.”

Hanbin’s lips tilted in a lopsided smile as he leaned forward, closing the small distance between their lips to steal a chaste kiss. His lips tasted vaguely of sweet grape juice.

“It’s already a given anyways, didn’t think I’d have to say it so directly,” Hanbin hummed against his lips once they parted, heads still tilted closely together.

“Oh, is it?” Hao’s fingers carded through the hair at the back of his head, gently massaging his scalp with the pads of his fingers. Hanbin’s head nodded eagerly, “You and your meticulously planned life.”

He could feel the warmth of Hanbin’s laugh against his lips, taunting him with how close their mouths still were. To take advantage of that, Hao leaned forward once more to press multiple little pecks onto Hanbin’s lips, only stopping once Hanbin pulled away.

“I’ve always known I’d marry someone kind, smart and witty,” He hummed causing Hao to affectionately roll his eyes at all the compliments, “Just didn’t know their name would be Hao until we met.”

Hao pulled in a breath, trying to stamp down the overwhelming twisting in his chest. His heart feeling like it was on the verge of expanding until it popped from all the love it housed for the man between his legs.

“Shared space! Mother incoming! Mother incoming!” He heard the shrill exclamation off to the side, followed by foot steps of his mother entering the room, hands filled to the brim with large brining containers.

In an attempt to seem proper, Hanbin quickly pulled away from Hao. Hao’s arms falling away from his neck from the sudden shift as Hanbin turned between his legs to face the kitchen once more, smiling innocently at Hao’s mother.

Despite knowing he should probably allow Hanbin to move back to assist his mother with packing away their prepared radishes, Hao’s legs moved to wrap around Hanbin’s waist and his arms slotted beneath his armpits, wrapping tightly around his chest. Pulling Hanbin back so his back was pressed to his chest, Hao hooked his chin over the top of Hanbin’s shoulder, watching his mother attempt to put all the containers on the countertop without any falling.

“Mom, I’m gunna cook dinner tonight,” Hao announced, pressing his lips into a fine line to snuff out his laughter when his mothers blown wide eyes turned to look at him skeptically. His mother eyes drifted over to Hanbin where he was locked in Hao’s hold. Though he couldn’t see his face in the moment, he felt the subtle shrug of his shoulders beneath his chin. “You just made fresh pickled radish, so I can try making Siraegi Guk!”

“Do you remember the first time–“

With a single hand outstretched with his palm facing his mother, he silenced her. Not letting her bring up the time he did his best at making it for the first time and it turned out horribly.

“I’m a grown adult now, I can do it.”

And like it would act as any comfort, Hanbin added, “I’ll help him.”

Though Hanbin was present during the entire cooking duration, he never really stopped Hao from making his own changes to the original recipe. His mother was already banished out of the kitchen the minute they begun so it was only up to Hanbin to keep him on track, but he stayed silent even when a bottle of vinegar was suddenly pulled from the cabinets.

The first spoon full was met with only a partially disgruntled look. The second had Hanbin burrowing his brows in visible confusion.

By the third, Hanbin’s hand was reaching out to grab his wrist. “The recipe doesn’t even call for vinegar?” His statement came out more like a question, like sitting there silently and allowing Hao to take the reigns had caused him so much mental turmoil.

“Everything tastes a little better sour,” Hao insisted and though he planned on adding another spoonful, he capped the vinegar and left it at three. Which caused the younger boy to smile gratefully at him, going back to his designated job of cleaning and chopping the radish stems for the toppings.

When dinner was served his mother stared at the bowl with distrust, the sourness of the vinegar cutting through the fishy aroma so blatantly because of how misplaced it was in the usual dish. When Hao tasted it, he hummed in satisfaction, urging the other two to try it.

His mother’s face twisted up despite her efforts to school her expression, giving her son a wary smile. When Hanbin tried it, his brows burrowed slightly from the shock of the vinegar but his smile was comforting and genuine when he looked up at Hao and told him that it was good.

“Better than Yujins?” Hao pressed, bringing another spoonful to his mouth as he watched Hanbin pointedly.

“It’s definitely got its own charm to it.” Hanbin assured him, which was neither denial nor agreement so Hao took it as confirmation anyways.

He turned to his mother with an expectant raised brow. His mother tentatively sipping on a small spoonful of the broth before she was flinching away and putting it back into the bowl, “It’s better than before.”

That was good enough. And probably only achieved since Hanbin was there to limit how many spoonfuls of vinegar he put into the pot.

By the end it was only himself and Hanbin who finished off the entirety of their bowls.

---

When night came and he was finally able to pull Hanbin away from his mother, he lead him back to his childhood bedroom. Where they quickly changed into comfortable clothing and washed themselves together in the bathroom.

Tomorrow they would board the train and go home, their little get away out of the city coming to an end and they’d soon be whisked back into their normal lives in the city.

After they both put away their dirty clothes into their bags, making sure their clothing for tomorrow was already pulled and neatly folded atop Hao’s childhood dresser, they both turned to the two single beds in the room.

They were small, fit to only hold Hao’s younger body and not the long legs he has grown into as he aged. To ensure both have a good nights rest, they mutually agreed to sleep in separate beds; Hao giving Hanbin his own, while he takes Yujin’s. The train ride was early in the morning and painfully long, so this agreement to sleep separately seemed like the best decision.

Hao thought he could probably handle it. Just one more night of sleeping alone wouldn’t be too hard, especially now that Hanbin is in the room with him, his presence should have been enough.

It wasn’t.

He noticed that only a couple minutes into settling beneath Yujin’s childhood blanket after shutting off the lights. The darkness was only cut through by the small stream of moonlight from the singular window, the interior still dark enough that the stars above their head begun to illuminate, though it was dulled from age.

Hao looked across the room with squinted eyes and could only make out the silhouette of Hanbin’s body beneath his blankets, his face completely out of view and cloaked in shadows.

“Hanbin.” Hao called out to him, the lump of blankets not reacting in the slightest to his call.

He stared for a moment longer before making the executive decision to push himself up, the blankets pooling at his waist from the action. After only a moment’s hesitation, he pushed the blankets off completely and swung his legs over the edge of the bed.

Quietly, he padded across the room towards the other bed. Before he could even make any move, a hand was coming from beneath the blankets and wrapped around his wrist.

With only a gasp to spare as a reaction, he was suddenly pulled down into the bed, the mattress creaking beneath them from the sudden plunge of weight. In a mess of movement, he was suddenly swallowed up completely by the blanket Hanbin pulled over them completely.

The blanket was pulled down from around their heads, both men laughing as their bodies instinctually begun to shuffle so they could comfortably settle into each other with the limited space. Hao had already practically fell on top of Hanbin, so he stayed there, hitching his leg up to rest bent over Hanbin’s waist, his arm coming to wrap around his chest as he rested his cheek on the pillow beside Hanbin’s head.

When Hanbin turned to look at him, the darkness of the room shadowed his features so heavily that even with their close proximity Hao could barely make out more than the bright toothy smile and glints of mischief in his eyes.

“I thought you fell asleep.” Hao breathed through his laughter, his heart still rabbiting in his chest from the sudden shock of Hanbin’s movement.

“How could I when my boyfriend was sleeping in a bed across the room instead of in my room because of his stubbornness?”

Hao scoffed, “It was for your own benefit! So you weren’t tired tomorrow morning.”

“I sleep better with you,” Hanbin hummed, his hand blindly searching for Hao’s that rested across his chest. When they found each other beneath the blanket, their fingers intertwined and rested over Hanbin’s pec.

Silence came over them suddenly, Hao focusing on the dull thud of Hanbin’s heart felt on the part of his hand that was resting on his chest. If he closed his eyes, he could feel it more definitely. Steady, and rhythmic.

“I think my sickness has become terminal.” Hao offhandedly comments after a moment of silence. He could feel Hanbin shift beside him, so he fluttered his eyes open to look at him once more. His lips tightening into a thin pressed line at the very obvious down pull of his brows, visibly confused.

“That night you asked me to cure your heart of its illness of falling for someone you just met,” Hao explains simply, tucking his head so he could no longer see Hanbin’s reaction, his face heating up with a gentle flush as he works himself through what he wishes to say. “Mines definitely terminal now.”

He hears Hanbin hum his acknowledgement, finally understanding the conversation. Can feel his head tilt, the warmth of his cheek resting against the top of his head as they both stare off into the darkness of Hao’s childhood bedroom.

“Incurable?”

“Most definitely.”

Hanbins chest hiccupped below their hands in a silent laugh, the cheek against his head nuzzling into his hair even further. “Such a round about way to say you love someone.” Hanbin’s tone was cheeky, throwing Hao’s words right back in his face in such a gleefully playful way.

Hao blinked once, allowed himself to relish in the press of Hanbin’s head against his own and the feeling of his warm hand against his palm before he was pulling his head back. Hanbin’s shifted along with his, head turned so he could look directly at him.

In the darkness, Hao watched as the playful glint in his eyes slowly drained. Maybe Hao wasn’t hiding his true intentions well enough, maybe every confession he had ever swallowed back down was showing so perfectly in every feature of his face.

Though his voice could not support the playfulness of his chosen response, Hao still spoke quietly, “Well, it’s already a given.” In the silence of the room, even with the most hushed tone he could muster, the confession felt loud even to Hao’s own ears.

The corners of Hanbin’s lips twitched, fighting a small smile as his big brown eyes flickered between both of Hao’s, earnestly waiting for more.

“Hanbin,” As reactive as always, Hanbin hummed to make sure Hao knew he was intently waiting. “You already know what I’m going to say.”

“Mn, but it’ll sound sweeter in your voice.” Hanbin murmurs, his fingers gently squeezing around the hand it held. “Plus I’ve been so patient already waiting for you to love me back.”

Hao blinked at him, could feel the emotions balling itself in his chest begin to choke him. He forcefully swallowed them down, knowing it would be too much to handle in the moment. With a strained voice, he greedily inquired, “How long have you been waiting?”

Hanbin gazed at him, with eyes so wide Hao thinks he could see snippets of his soul, baring itself vulnerably for Hao’s eyes alone, “Since that night we shared a meal with your brother and Taerae.”

Hao couldn’t help the satisfied giggle that left his throat, leaning in to gently nudge the tips of their noses together. Completely overtaken by how smitten he was for the man laying beside him.

“When you asked me for my assistance?” Hao questions, their noses nudging again as Hanbin nods his confirmation, “What a taint on my otherwise clean nursing history if I had attempted to cure something already past help.”

“Hao,” Hanbin’s whisper sounded almost like a plea when he breathed his name, “Say it.”

Hao thinks he could have probably gotten away with teasing him for a little, could have satisfied his own need to be the one with the upper hand. Holding back the words Hanbin so desperately wished to hear.

But it was something his heart also wished to speak, so in the end, his voice a tender whisper, “I love you, Sung Hanbin.”

Hao felt the exhale of breath from Hanbin’s mouth against his own, the corners of his lips quirking upwards in a small, pleasant smile from the reaction.

“I love you, Zhang Hao.”

In the darkness of Hao’s childhood bedroom, beneath dull artificial light of scattered star stickers, their mouths found each other in a gentle, passionate kiss. Sealing the promise of forever there.

Notes:

bffs ... we are so done. who cheered!!!!!!!

thank you everyone for reading so much .. i never expected it to be over 100k LMFAO especially when there is literally no angst... like at all ??? what plot did it even really have other than two men falling inlove. but thank you for the continued support through all of this. i really enjoyed writing this and i hope everyone liked reading it as well :3

shoutout to mick for giving me this fic idea back in like 2015.. and shout out to den for encouraging me to become a 100k fic believer !!!!!!

you can find me on twitter!
thank you again for everyone that stuck it out until the end.
i appreciate you all !!