Chapter Text
Leslie’s office has wallpaper that is peeling at the corners. It’s not very noticable. Jason supposes most of the doctor’s patients don’t notice this.
“I really don’t have an intimacy problem anymore, Doc.” Jason strains against the urge to huff. The only person he entertains as much as Leslie is Alfred. What can he say, he’s weak to their perpetually grandparenty natures.
Leslie lets out a soft sigh, setting her pen and pad on the table between them. “Jason, you know I’m not afraid to say that your family has real communication problems . Plus a lot of trauma to sort through and you know how I feel about the dangers you all face everyday. Maybe it’s not an intimacy problem, but you could stand to make connections outside of the immediate family.”
Jason raises an eyebrow, leaning forward in his chair in mild amusement. “You know I know other people right? The Outlaws? The Titans? The Justice League?”
Leslie gives him a soft smile, leaving Jason feeling like he said exactly what she expected him to. “But do you know anyone that you don’t think of professionally? Most people your age would say something like classmates or members of a club.”
“I don’t exactly think it’s fair to compare me to other people my age, given the whole dying then resurrection thing.” Jason frowns, crossing his arms and uncrossing them again when Leslie just looked amused by his actions.
“I know, Jason. It wasn’t fair that you were robbed of so much of your teenage years. That is exactly why I want you to consider what I’m saying. You don’t have to meet brand new people, but you could build stronger relationships with people outside of your family. Let yourself have a life outside of vigilantism and the manor. You deserve to discover yourself a bit more after all these years.” Leslie’s gaze went to her hands clasped in her lap as she talked, her smile turning into a frown.
“It isn’t as damaging as you would think, Doc.” Jason waves a hand in vague dismissal, “I still grew up. I live on my own and buy my own groceries. I appreciate your concern, Doc, but I take care of myself just fine.”
The faint smile makes its way back onto Leslie’s face, “At our next monthly checkup I’d like for those stitches to be done healing, do not go tearing them open.”
Jason nods, standing and shrugging on his jacket, “I’ll make the supply rounds tonight. Stay safe, Leslie.”
Leslie holds her hand out for Jason to shake, patting his wrist as he takes it, “and bring someone else with you, or I will be very annoyed.”
-
Bernard shakes his head, giving Tim a comforting rub on the back as they listen to his boyfriend’s brother rant about his therapist appointment.
Stephanie hands Jason a slice of pizza from the box, hoping to silence him for at least a minute.
“She’s not too wrong, Jason.” Bernard says. “You enrolled in college and never showed up. Of course the Red Hood is important to you, but it wouldn’t hurt for you to.. y’know… have a real life where you get drunk as shit and go on blind dates.” Bernard gestures between himself, Tim and Stephanie as he talks, emphasising that it’s what they do, even when two thirds of them have a secret vigilante life.
“Please do not bring his dating life into this. It’s messy enough.” Stephanie groanes, unbothered by Jason’s offended look.
“My dating life is completely normal, thank you! And I can get drunk on my own. I don’t need somebody counting my shots.”
“Jay, the fact that you’re saying that just shows you need to get out more,” Tim sighs, picking up a cup.
“Or like, at least invite people over,” Stephanie adds, taking a bite of pizza.
“Who’s inviting who over?” Dick questions, getting comfortable against Jason’s legs, earning an over-exaggerated eye roll.
“We’re talking about the lack of people being invited over to Jason’s place.” Tim supplies.
“Speaking of, Jason, when are we going to-“
“Not happening.” Jason lightly kicks Dick in the back, irritation filling his tone.
“Okay, okay, Little Wing. Just a suggestion.” Dick holds his hands up in mock surrender.
“Yeah, a bad one.”
“It was so normal!”
“Quiet the volume, you two,” Barbara smiles, sitting on the floor beside Dick.
“Why do you not invite Kent’s elder brother to your apartment, Todd? You are both in desperate need of companionship.” Damian interjects from his place on the windowsill.
“You could not have worded that stranger, Dami,”
Duke snorts. “They both need friends, not a pet.”
“Animals make happiness,” Cass nods, leaning over the back of the couch and pointing at Jason. Then she settles her glare onto Damian. “Little brother has friends,” she says firmly. Damian shrugs, turning back to the laptop balancing on his lap.
“Cass is better than all of you.” Jason high fives his sister when she offers her hand.
Alfred and Bruce both walk in once the chatter calms down, sitting in the two remaining arm chairs. Damian closes his laptop and makes his way over to the sofa, squeezing between Bernard and Tim with an eyebrow raised. Stephanie hands the remote to Barbara while Duke connects the dvd player and television. Cass claps in appreciation when the television screen flashes on and Jason leans his head on his hand, ignoring Dick as the eldest rests his head back on the younger’s knees. Barbara chooses a horror movie per Stephanie’s request. Tim tosses Duke a throw cushion to hug as they all settle into the movie.
As the movie ends Alfred rises to his feet, offering a hand to collect the plates. Stephanie and Jason make for the glasses as the trio populate the kitchen sink with dirty dishes.
“Thank you, I will finish tidying up. You two should go ahead and get ready for patrols and I will see you in the cave.” Alfred shooes them both out of the kitchen with a smile.
“Here’s hoping for a quiet night.” Stephanie stretches, waving at Jason as he opens the front door.
“Yeah, definitely,” Jason agrees, knowing that there was never a quiet night in Crime Alley. Anger and desperation is what keeps the people in the alley alive. Trauma didn’t make Jason kind, he consciously made himself kind because he didn’t want anyone to suffer like he did. Jason Todd may never be a good person, may always be doomed to failure and violence as long as he lives, but he knows what it’s like. His empathy is all he has. Jason knows what the rest of the family seems to believe, that trauma and bad experiences make them stronger, the “what doesn’t kill you” bullshit. But trauma doesn’t make you strong, and what doesn’t kill you leaves you whimpering like an injured dog. Survivors make themselves strong. Their trauma made them nothing but confused and harmed and the abusers should never get the credit for the survivors being good people. They did that all on their own. Maybe the people of Crime Alley are not traditionally good, but they try the hardest out of everyone Jason knows. They deserve the quiet night Jason hopes for more than he ever would.
The walk to his apartment is only half an hour away from the manor. As always he spends his entire time checking over his shoulder, making sure no one followed him.
He wonders if he will ever outgrow the unease, or if it will always follow him like an abandoned dog.
-
The Outlaws have been on break for the past 5 months with no signs of getting back to work in the imminent future.
Therefore, Jason feels perfectly correct for assuming that something bad must have happened for Arsenal to be waiting on the roof of his apartment block, cleaning arrows and humming quietly.
“Is there an emergency?” This seems to shock Arsenal as he pockets the cloth and stands up to greet Jason.
“Not that I’m aware of.” Arsenal shrugs, opening his arms and inching closer with a shit-eating grin on his face. Jason rolls his eyes and opens his arms, Roy happily enveloped his best friend in his arms and made a failed attempt to lift him up. Jason laughs as Roy makes a choking sound at his lack of strength.
“So what are you here for, Arse?”
“What? A guy can’t visit for funsies?”
“You never have before?”
Jason notices Arsenal looking mildly bashful as the ginger fixes his cap. “I missed you, man. You’ve never exactly given me radio silence before.”
Jason shrugs, motioning to the door to their right. “Pasta?”
Arsenal laughs as he holds the door open for Jason. “Do I get to make smoothies?”
Jason shakes his head as they walk down the dimly lit hall, pulling out his keys and unlocking the door, half tempted to slam it behind him. “I only have strawberries and oranges though.”
“That’s all I need,” Arsenal grins, dramatically doing the muscle man pose that always makes Jason cringe when he starts making kissy noises at his own biceps.
“I’m not above chucking you out, Arsenal,” Jason points out, sitting his keys on the counter and removing his helmet.
“There’s the face that I’ve missed so much,” Arsenal grins, patting Jason’s cheek as he hangs up his equipment and takes off his hat and glasses. “Turn off for like five minutes, please. It’s Roy now.” Roy winks, making Jason regret letting him in at all.
“Keep talking and you’ll just be getting plain pasta,” Jason threatens, shrugging off his jacket and making his way to the kitchen.
“I’m sure you’d still make it delicious,” Roy waves away the threat, following Jason into the kitchen and beginning to set the pots out while Jason opens the fridge.
“Oh, you flatter me, you hunk,” Jason swoons, fanning his face and feeling extremely satisfied when Roy gives a surprised laugh. He grabs his ‘kiss the chef’ apron Dick gave him months ago.
“Anything for you, honey.” Roy bats his eyelashes and pouts.
“Heathen,” Jason chuckles.
Roy taps his shoulder and points to the door. “You go get cleaned up, you were on patrol tonight, Jay.”
Jason hesitantly hands over the wooden spoon with a raised eyebrow. “If you’re saying I smell, I’m going to commit a crime.”
Roy shakes his head and gives Jason a push. “I’m saying relax for two minutes because I’m a big boy and capable of stirring a pot.”
“Oh believe me I’m aware.”
“You were never the victim of it, pretty boy.”
Jason pinches the bridge of his nose and exits the room, un-attaching his utility belt and taking off his chest plate as he walks into the bedroom, shutting it behind him. As he goes around his room, getting changed into sweatpants and a shirt and washing his face, he is shocked to recognise the ease he felt with Roy in his space. The out of tune disco that his friend is singing made for weirdly calming background noise. Not that Jason would ever tell him that.
Jason opens the door to the bedroom and turns the light on. He stands in the door frame for a moment, looking from his bedroom to the open kitchen door. He chews on his lip and feels slightly guilty as he face-plants onto the bed, his legs half hanging off and the pillow shoved under his head. He closes his eyes and lets out a breath, nuzzling the pillow and humming along to Roy’s singing, fighting sleep.
As Jason listens to Roy teetering around the kitchen, just being alive and busy, he feels an odd twinge in his heart. Roy deserves so much, he has been through so much hurt and betrayal and he is still so gentle. He is still able to sit his strength down on the table to let it rest and sit back and talk and be vulnerable and love so enormously. Roy could be disappointed and broken to pieces, but still give his all as he puts himself back together again.
Jason wishes he could be that for Roy, but Jason is a cornered animal. He doesn’t always understand why he bites and doesn’t let go. He is terrified of people leaving, so he finds it difficult. If he drives what he loves away, at least then he knows why he is left so alone. Because he pushed them away, because it was his choice, rather than something he can control, rather than not being enough. Jason is controlled by a muzzle of insecurity that he cannot shake.
At some point in his spiralling Jason must’ve dozed off, because he wakes to Roy giving his shoulder a terribly gentle shake. Roy’s voice is gentle and he knows he is safe. “C’mon Jay, you gotta try the pasta. I need my personal Gordon Ramsay.”
Jason makes a soft noise and lifts his face away from the pillow to look up at Roy’s face and the two bowls he was balancing in between his legs and sighed. Roy smiles and taps the spot beside him at the top of the bed. He begins giggling at Jason’s face as he shuffles sluggishly up the bed and leans against the pillows beside Roy. Jason lifts his hands as a silent request. Roy nods and passes him the bowl, watching him out of the corner of his eye as they both blow on their forks full of pasta.
Jason takes a bite and tilts his head. He turns to Roy and gives him a thumbs up, ignoring Roy’s smug-ass satisfied grin. “Thanks, Roy.”
“Not a problem, Jay.”
They eat in a comfortable silence. Jason elbows Roy for something to do and they both end up landing a fork of pasta on the bed. Roy has the decency to look sheepish and pick the food up, but Jason started it and couldn’t bring himself to care.
“Hand it over.” Jason gestures to the bowl once Roy’s is finally empty. The archer shakes his head and hands over the bowl. He follows the other vigilante to the kitchen and turns off the tap when Jason tries to fill the basin of dishes.
“What age are you?” Jason asks incredulously, throwing down the sponge and putting his hands on his hips.
“As much as I love doing chores with you,” Roy gestures to the sink, “I wanna catch up! Why don’t we play some games or watch something?”
“This will take literally ten minutes,” Jason huffs, turning the tap back on and side eyeing Roy, daring him to try his shit again.
Roy groans, throwing his arms up. “Okay, okay, fine. I’ll dry and put it away then.”
“Didn’t ask you to do that.”
“Enjoy the free labour while you have it.”
Jason just rolls his eyes in response, turning off the tap and picking up the first plate.
“So what are you really doing here?” Jason questions as he passes it onto Roy.
“Why do I have to have some secret motive?” Roy frowns, hitting Jason with the damp tea towel to grab his attention properly.
“The last time you did this was because you needed to get away and you knew I wouldn’t tell anyone. You’ve gotta be here for some reason so stop beating around it, Arse.” Jason turns to face Roy, one soapy hand on the counter and the other gesturing between them.
Roy sighs, crossing his arms and leaning back against the counter. “Cass let me know that Thompkins said something, ‘said it put you a little on edge. So I thought, ‘hey, let’s go see one of our best buds and see how he’s doin’.’”
“Well, you’ve checked, feel free to get out now.” Jason snatches the tea towel from Roy’s hands.
“Woah, I’m not going just yet.” Roy puts his hands up in mock surrender, then moves quickly to grab his towel back, starting a stubborn game of tug of war.
“Would love it if I could have this,” Jason growles, trying to snatch it back with two hands, making the towel more sudsy. “Would also love it if you would take your pity and snarkiness and get out of my apartment.”
“Who said it was pity?”
“I’m not in the mood for your shit, Roy.”
Roy frowns, relinquishing the towel and budging Jason out of the way with an elbow. He takes the sponge and resumes the vigilante’s previous job. “I know I’m not your first choice person wise, but I’m not leaving you to wallow and be moody.”
“You’d be leaving me in peace,” Jason snaps, glaring at the archer.
“You don’t like quiet anyways.” Roy waves his hand, using the other to put plates in the drying rack.
“You might just frustrate me to tears,” Jason groans, patience wearing thin.
“It’s a speciality.”
Jason walks out of the room, walking into his bedroom and rummaging around the dresser, throwing a pair of joggers onto the bed. Roy follows him shortly after, giving a flirtatious whistle.
“Trying to get me outta my clothes, Jay?”
“Stop talking.” Jason replies, lying down on the opposite end of the bed face down.
Roy simply hums in response and continues getting changed, surprising Jason with the simple fact that he listened. He knows a few people that need to be more like that.
“Hey, Roy?”
“What happened to stop talking?”
“What happened to the smoothie I was promised?”
“Touché. Carry on.”
“You can’t judge until I’m finished.”
“Whatever you say, sweetie.”
Jason rolls his eyes, rolling onto his back and folding his arms behind his head, aware of Roy’s curious stare as he makes himself more comfortable. “So, like, Leslie won’t stop talking about my issues making ‘lasting connections’ and ‘attachment issues’,” Jason motions air quotes and elbows Roy when he sees the amused look on his face. “Which then set the whole family needing to give their two cents about my social and dating life. Leslie told me to bring someone to my next checkup to show that I’m like, branching out or whatever? If you’re around in a few weeks would you come with me? Just to get them off my back?”
Roy grins and grabs Jason’s arms, excitedly tugging him to be face to face. “Does that mean I can stay for a few weeks?”
Jason raises an eyebrow, “..if you want?”
Roy gives him a satisfied grin and shuffles closer to the vigilante. “I might have an idea.” He starts in a sing-song voice.
“Oh, fantastic,” Jason replies sarcastically, looking sceptical at the archer.
“Do you think we can convince them that we’re together? Maybe even engaged! I’m sure Doctor Thompkins would love to be the officiator!”
At the suggestion Jason feels an immediate vile response on the tip of his tongue. Because what Jason will never admit to anyone who has ever known him is how desperately he wants to be openly loved without shame. That he wants someone who would grab him when they were excited and kiss his palms and smile at him and want him. He wants so viciously to be wanted and he doesn’t know how much longer empty praise from people he had protected or long poetry or old novels full of understanding will be a good enough stand-in for being wanted.
And it was Roy suggesting it. That very fact makes something inside him seethe, something inside him turns into a feral animal from shame. It claws at his rib cage in search of an outlet.
Because Jason finds the archer attractive. Hell, he even likes Roy as a person. Jason does not go beyond basic friendship with people like Roy, and especially not dating or pretending to.
Because a little bit of Jason has always been in love with Roy.
“Wine and dine me before proposing marriage, you scoundrel,” Jason admonishes, patting Roy’s cheek just for the look of astonishment on his face and turns around burying his face in his pillow as he closes his eyes. “If you’ll get a kick out of it, sure. But that means you have to deal with Dick’s confusion.”
“Not a problem.” Roy pats the vigilante’s back and turns to the opposite side himself, shuffling under the covers, unable to wipe the smile from his face. “Goodnight, Jay.”
“Who said I was letting you sleep in my bed?!”
“We’re engaged now, honey. It’s only appropriate.”
“If you try and steal the blankets like last time it’ll be a divorce.”
Roy hums in response.
-
The following night on patrol Jason begrudgingly allows Roy to accompany him for the night.
The night started off as it always did, the comms were full of chatter for the first half an hour or so. The vigilante supposes you could say they’d been productive. They’d done their rounds with Leslie, who raised an eyebrow and gave Roy a big smile. Irritatingly the latter winked at the doctor in response. Roy followed along silently as Jason went on his usual intel route, getting another lead on a case. Lately, however, his intel is only half right. Whether it’s accidental or not, he isn’t sure.
“Any of the Johns getting too bold?” Jason questions the small group of working girls. The nights have been slow the past month, Jason knows. He’d honestly rather their quiet disappointment than the period of time where Lacey was killed and the other girls were black and blue and full of tears.
“I think your protection has kept most of them under control, actually,” Jessie replies, tapping off her cigarette, looking at Gemma and Farrah for confirmation.
“If we didn’t love you so much, Hoodie, we’d curse ya’ for the lack of business,” Farrah nods, giving the Red Hood a gentle punch on the shoulder.
“Whose this lad hovering around ya’, Red?” Gemma points a finger past Jason to where Roy is loitering rather awkwardly.
“Arsenal, he’s a friend. We’ve worked together a lot.” Jason explains as Roy inched closer, doing over dramatic poses that had Jessie and Farrah laughing and Gemma rolling her eyes.
Jason shakes his head, turning back to the girls, he hands over a small slip of paper from his pocket. “The new burner. Stay safe. I’ll be ‘round again soon, alright?”
Gemma gives a mock salute and Farrah ruffles her friend’s hair, earning a string of swears in her direction.
“Your concern is sexy as always, Hoodie,” Jessie smiles, pocketing the paper in her leather jacket. “Keep yourself safe.”
Jason nods, grappling up the building adjacent, Roy following him wordlessly. Jason turns around to face the archer. “Awfully quiet tonight, Arsenal.”
Roy shrugs, smiling. “It’s just nice to see you so at ease with what you’re doing. I’m trying not to cramp your style too much.”
Jason nods, pressing his hand to his helmet as he tunes in to what information Oracle is giving, finally giving in and turning off the comms. None of the information exchanged is ever relevant to him.
“What’s next on the agenda?” Roy questions, standing beside the vigilante.
“I need you to hang around where the girls are. I’m going to intervene in some drug runs. Black Mask has gotten his hands on more kids. I’ll send them your way. Keep them safe, alright?”
Roy nods, turning around and hesitating. “You won’t need backup?”
“There’s nothing left for Mask to do that would surprise me. Thanks for your concern though, honey,” Jason replies, amping up the sarcasm for the pet name.
Roy narrows his eyes, giving Jason a once-over. “You know they’ll be expecting you?”
“Well, when has anything ever been easy and simple?” Jason shrugs, grappling away, swinging from roof to roof, keeping an eye out for the dealer he had a description of.
Being a drug runner in Crime Alley before even getting to double digits is depressingly common, just like the girls being expected to become prostitutes after a certain age. Jason had seen a few boys he recognised from the alley making their way into scraping by in Gotham City, but so many of the girls that Jason knew were killed on the job. He doesn’t know where the girls he knows now get their bravery from. How much violence they must have suffered through to choose to be as gentle as they are. The power of the gender imbalance of the alley follows Jason like a ghost, like a companion for Catherine Todd. His mum being unable to escape her abusive husband, being held captive by addiction and still trying so hard to care for Jason when she could. Willis could do whatever the fuck he liked and no one would judge him, but he knew people in the alley judged his mother for not being good enough, but she goddamn fucking tried and still had to shoulder that blame.
The alleys are too quiet tonight; a dead giveaway that he’s probably going to have to stumble into a trap. Great. Fantastic. Always a treat.
Jason drops to the street, looking left and right, hearing the telltale sign of someone slipping on wet concrete as he whistles and begins walking forward. As Jason gets closer the sound ceases and he lets out a sigh. “Kid? It’s Hood, you ain’t in trouble.”
A small face peeks around the corner, his hair sticking up and his face wet from the rain. The kid shakes his head, looking between Jason and around the corner, tears forming in his eyes. Jason motions towards himself, “smokers corner, kid. Now.”
The kid looks at him with wide eyes. Jason fixes the kid with a hard look that knocks the kid into gear. Jason turns around the corner, tense and ready for a fight. The alley is empty, the only thing noticeable is the rats fighting over scraps a little to his left. Jason hears the footsteps behind him belatedly and swings round, ducking out of the way as a pipe is swung at his helmet. Jason brings his fist up to punch the stomach of the bastard, but is tugged backwards by the back of his jacket and slammed into a stack of wooden crates. He throws an arm back, feeling satisfied when his fist connects with a knee and a loud swear is yelled behind him.
The fuckers haven’t even bothered to wear any sort of mask. Jason brings his knees up to his chest and kicks when long-face comes at him, the metal pipe hitting off of a brick wall and rolling away. Jason stands, throwing his jacket off onto the pile of crates, uniform be damned. He is not getting thrown around like a ragdoll. Jason walks toward the man he punched, who is still sputtering, and gives him a kick. “Get the fuck up.”
“Black Mask said to give you his regards,” the man grins. Jason rolls his eyes, shoots his other knee for good measure and turns away. The moment he turns he realises his mistake as he feels a sharpness pierce through the skin of his shoulder. Jason swears and turns around. The thug had pulled a gun out, seeming far too smug for a guy that had pissed off the Red Hood.
“Tell him to stop using errand boys. It’s fucking embarrassing,” Jason snarls, giving in to the urge and punching the man square in the face. Jason flexes his hand, aggravated by the pain in his shoulder, the bullet still buried in his flesh. “And stop using kids as cover, it’s pathetic.”
“Not as pathetic as being cornered at a dead end, Red Hood.” Two more men walk around the corner, much bigger and smugger than the two lying on the pavement.
Jason turns in a circle, bringing a hand to his helmet, “oh no! I never noticed that at all. I am positively bamboozled.”
Neither man seems impressed by this. The larger and quieter of them swings the crowbar he had behind his back, because there is just never a shortage of crowbars in Gotham. Forget gun control when these metal fucks are everywhere. Jason brings his good arm up to block the impact as the man aims for his head. He swears when he sees the other thug taking the gun from his holster and beginning to aim with both hands. Jason drops to the ground as the first gunshot goes off. Picking up the metal pipe, he swings with his good arm with as much force as he can, the crack of a kneecap shattering gives him a rush of confidence as he wrestles for the crowbar, frustration clouding his judgement as the man gives it a swing. Jason, still holding on, tumbles to the side. The man is on top of him in a second, hands around his throat. The second thug has a needle and Jason sees green as he grows immediately more desperate. He grabs around the floor and quickly smashes a bottle against the head of the man strangling him.
The man with the needle seems temporarily daunted and Jason takes the opportunity to throw what is left of the bottle, the butt of it hitting the man in the nose.
Jason is pulling his other gun out of his utility belt when the remaining thug stills at the sound of a whistle. Jason hits the thug closest to him with the butt of his gun and turns around to see the other lying face down on the floor, groaning in pain, with an arrow sticking out of his left side.
“You were meant to stay with them!” Jason yells, seething as he feels worry make its way through his chest. “I can’t fucking believe you left them alone!”
Roy silently makes his way down to the pavement, Jason’s angry face trained on him. “Spoiler has the corner covered and Red Robin’s following a lead on the operation these pricks have going.”
Jason’s expression remains unchanged to Roy’s surprise. “You were meant to stay because I knew I could trust them with you!” Jason snarls, the modulator in his helmet makes a crackle at the volume.
“I wouldn’t leave them defenceless, Hood!” Roy snaps back, “and you clearly need my help more than they do.” Roy gestures to the men lying on the ground, retrieving his arrows from the bodies.
“I had it fucking handled,” Jason yells, barging past Roy and unholstering his grappling gun.
Roy grabs his arm, cringing when Jason winced. “You can’t go grappling around the city with a knife sticking out of your shoulder. Sit down for just a second.”
“Shockingly, I don’t need your help with that either.”
“There’s a reason we work in teams, Hood. Now stop your complaining and let me help you.” Roy holds out his used arrows for Jason to hold, the latter snatches them off of the archer and sits on the edge on one of the broken crates.
“These laced?” Jason questions, holding up the arrow by the feathered end.
“Of course,” Roy laughs, mainly at the subject change.
“Little-Wing!” Dick’s voice travels through the alley as he skids round the corner, a panicked energy to his movements as he stops in front of Roy.
“I’ve never met a more dramatic group of people,” Jason groans, letting his face fall into his hands.
“You were shot!” Dick shouts, pointing at the blood seeping through his uniform.
“I’m handling it,” Roy replies, pressing a cloth on the wound and cringing. “Okay, I’m only able to semi handle it. It never exited.”
Dick is behind Jason in an instant, looking where Roy is pointing. “Let’s bring you back to the cave.”
“Okay, first of all, is no one else seeing the criminals lying around right now? Second of all, nope.” Jason makes sure to pop the ‘p’ at the end of the word.
“Hood, I love you, I do. But I am not repeating Sydney if I don’t have to.” Roy pats his good shoulder.
“What happened in Sydney?” Dick questions.
“This.” Jason gestures to his back. “Arsenal had to use tweezers to get out the bullet and had to whine about it the entire time.”
“You bleed like a fountain, sweetheart. It was gross.”
Jason and Dick both do a double take at Roy as the latter looks at them blankly.
“We’re unpacking that later.” Dick motions between the other two. “For now, let’s head to the Batmobile. Can you stand?”
“It was my arm not my fucking leg and I’m not going,” Jason grunts, standing up.
“How are the stitches?” Dick questions with a sigh, putting a hand on his hip.
Roy raises an eyebrow at Jason, who shakes his head. “I’ll go to Leslie’s, okay? You can finish my patrol and I’ll finish early. Happy?”
“Okay,” Dick concedes and turns to pat Roy on the arm, “Take care of him.”
Roy nods and rolls his eyes, turning back to Jason, “Only your family would be happy over what is essentially more work hours.”
-
After some fanfare they make it to Leslie’s clinic, Jason walks in and Roy follows behind him sheepishly, feeling out of place and like a bit of a dick for getting blood on the floor. Granted it isn’t his blood, but he feels someone needs to have sympathy for the poor woman.
Jason is currently sitting on one of the beds, his helmet off as well as his shirt as Leslie inspects the damage whilst she walks around the room grabbing whatever she seems to feel she’d need. The vigilant has his arms crossed and is hunching away from the archer and Roy feels a twinge of sadness at the sight. Jason Todd is not vain, but he is prideful. Anything that isn’t showing a sign of strength is a sign of weakness he can’t afford. That’s why Roy can’t get his head around the contradiction of his embarrassment of his resurrection. Confusion is something Roy could understand about Jason’s situation. But Jason is shy to show any physical evidence of his phenomenon, views it as a weakness rather than a strength. At least that’s what Roy thinks.
When Roy looks at Jason the first thing he sees isn’t all he’s been through. It’s that he scrunches his nose when he’s irritated or his lopsided smirk when he’s amused. After that it’s Jason. It’s his book habits and his refusal of letting Roy or Bizarro carry the groceries. It’s the way he grabs one of them when he’s laughing and the fact that he still has every stuffed animal Barbara gave him when he was younger stuffed behind his door in a black bag. Stuffed animals he has only ever given up for two little kids in Crime Alley that he had gotten too attached to.
Roy is broken out of whatever thought process he’s worked himself into by Leslie’s voice. “So, Jason, I’m pleasantly surprised you actually listened to me?”
Jason motions his hand back and forth. “Roy Harper, Leslie Thompkins. Leslie Thompkins, Roy Harper.”
Roy walks towards Leslie, unsure of himself as he holds out his hand to shake. He never thought he’d feel like he was meeting Jason’s grandma, but here he is, basically.
“Lovely to properly meet you.” Leslie smiles, shaking his hand before turning back to Jason.
“You too. I’m, uh, Jason’s boyfriend.”
Leslie and Jason both whip their heads around with matching looks of shock. Jason recovers quickly and smiles smugly. “I told you, Doc. I’ve got friends outside of the family. and a boyfriend.”
Leslie takes a moment to look between the two boys and laughs, turning back to Jason’s shoulder as she prepares to remove the bullet and all of the gross stuff after it. “Not to offend you, Jason, but I’m surprised.” Leslie takes a moment to think before speaking again. “And oddly proud.”
Jason raises an eyebrow but remains completely still as Leslie sets to work. An unusual silence settles heavily in the room. Jason is looking at Roy with an expression he can’t quite figure out the meaning of.
After another couple of minutes of Leslie patching Jason up, she taps the young vigilante on the shoulder with a smile. “All done.”
Jason nods mutely, grabbing his shirt from beside him and throwing it over his head. Roy secretly mourns the loss of the view as Jason stands and dusts off his pants.
Leslie rests her face on her hand, raising an eyebrow at Jason. “How come you never mentioned this boyfriend before?” she points with a swirling motion in a manner Roy would only call teasingly.
Roy is surprised by the way Jason immediately tenses, his eyebrows furrowing as he chews the inside of his cheek. “I never told you I was gay.” Jason shrugs.
“Oh, Jason, Roy being a boy hardly matters. All you need for any relationship is for someone to love you and for you to love them back. A romantic one is no different, Jason Todd. All I could hope for is for you to let someone love you and have them be worthy of that.” Leslie pats Jason on the cheek and opens her arms, Jason gives her a tentative hug.
Roy feels torn between intruding and crying at the sweetness of the moment. Roy knows Leslie is the only doctor Jason trusts. She helps the people Jason cares about and protects, and she’s seen every scar the vigilante has ever had. Leslie had been the one to do Jason’s autopsy, and Roy knows it means a lot to Jason that out of everyone before he died, Leslie Thompkins stayed the same. Roy doesn’t know if Leslie ever had kids or grandkids, but seeing her with Jason fills him with appreciation, because Jason deserves someone like her that he can call family.
Leslie stands back from Jason and gives him a pat on the arm. “You’re lucky those stitches are still in place.”
“Noted.” Jason smiles, grabs his helmet from the table and walks out the door, a light blush on his cheeks made visible under the harsh lighting. Roy figures the embarrassment is finally hitting his friend.
“You two are very cute,” Leslie comments as Roy waves on his way out.
“I like to think so too,” Roy says, shutting the door behind him.
-
Jason is in a pretty good mood as the pair swing across the city. The sky is turning a greyish blue that tells them sunrise isn’t too far off. Despite seeming quite content, the vigilante hasn’t said a word. Roy thinks that’s rare for Jason, but maybe the unexpected kindness from Leslie is keeping him speechless for the time being.
As they enter Jason’s apartment, assuredly unseen, Roy decides to break the silence.
“I’m sorry. I assumed everyone knew about the gay thing.”
Jason waves him off as he makes his way to the bedroom, “honestly, it’s never come up with Leslie. It’s not like I was hiding it from her, but I never thought I’d have any reason for her to know.”
Roy grins, throwing an arm around Jason’s shoulders and laughing at the eye roll he receives. “You got so bashful,” Roy teases.
Jason elbows him in response, shaking Roy off in order to sit on his bed and untie his boots. “Well, getting a genuinely nice conversation from the woman who had to cut my dead body open isn’t something I’m ever prepared for.”
Roy sighs at the mention of Jason’s death. “Get used to it. She looks so fond of you.”
“It will pass once she finds another stray to take in,” Jason replies as he puts his boots to the corner of the room and reaches for his casual clothes.
Roy crosses his arms, “I really don’t think she’s like that.”
“Whatever,” Jason shrugs, heading towards the bathroom.
Roy takes Jason’s place on the bed. “You can’t think like this forever, Jay.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Jason concedes, just to stop this portion of their conversation. “At least she believed it. You don’t have to stick around much longer if you don’t want to.”
“I’m here for the long-haul,” Roy admonishes, beginning to get changed himself. “And I think we should do something today.”
“You need to be more specific than ‘something’,” Jason replies, looking away from Roy whilst the other finishes.
“It’s a surprise.” Roy smiles, earning a frown from Jason who begins to get settled into bed.
“Can’t interfere with the night life,” Jason replies, holding the blanket up for Roy and feeling very close to gross from the domestic scene they were playing out. Jason’s time is always going to be borrowed, he needs to put it to practical use.
Roy smiles at Jason then, really smiles, and Jason crushes the butterflies as they start to hatch in his stomach. Roy leans over and has his head on Jason’s shoulder, patting his leg. “Someone else can cover your route. Humour me.”
Jason is shocked by the immediate reflex of putting his head on top of Roy’s. “Whatever.” He shakes his head, budging the archer off of him so that he could lie the opposite way. Jason has a general rule: he does not like to be touched. However, it is a dislike born from the mere fact that he craves it far too much. The truth that Jason wants someone to hug him because they love him, or pat his shoulder out of fondness, is something Jason has tried to bury like he had been. But just like him, it resurrects. He wants to be held so very tight that it will piece him back together again and mend the relationships he has damaged.
Roy, as always, seems unbothered as he pats Jason’s back, getting settled himself. “G’night, Jay.”
“Night, Roy.”
-
Jason spends his morning baffled as he wakes up to multiple texts from Cass, Damian and Dick, which really only serves to make him feel more out of the loop.
Roy tries to insist that Jason should just magically become illiterate as they sit on the subway. Roy links his arm with Jason and the subway digital sign is reading six stops until Metropolis. Roy is on his phone beside Jason, although turning the phone away from Jason’s view awfully suspiciously.
“What are you hiding?” Jason huffs, giving in after two minutes of trying to peek at the archers phone, put off that the other is getting the better of him. Roy could be leading them to a Superman Fanclub Meeting or they could be getting a pony and Jason’s would not have any idea which fucking one it would be.
Roy smirks in response, waving his now locked phone in front of Jason’s face, “Wouldn’t you like to know, pretty boy?”
“You’re insufferable.”
“It’s a part of my boyish charm.”
“You mean goofy.”
“Take a photo with me, pretty boy.”
“Fine.”
Roy shuffles minutely closer to Jason, slinging his arm around his shoulder as he grins. Jason mimics Roy, his expression looking extremely awkward. Jason notices Roy moving closer on the camera and opens his mouth to speak. Jason nearly jumps out of his skin when he feels Roy’s lips press on his cheek and the archer making an exaggerated ‘mwah’ sound. Jason feels his face warm up as Roy pulls back laughing, looking at his phone and opening his photos. Roy hands the phone over to Jason, the screen displaying Roy, grinning, kissing Jason’s cheek, and Jason’s surprised face, a smile on the corner of his mouth.
Jason should have known Roy would take this seriously, far too seriously. As long as Jason has known Roy the latter takes everything as a challenge. Jason supposes he’s always going to be some sort of challenge to Roy.
“I have to frame this,” Roy cheers, sending the photo over to Jason. “I’m sure a certain older brother of yours would have a field day with this.”
Jason fixes him with his best ‘I fucking dare you’ look, “I am not above fighting you on this train.”
“You couldn’t hurt me, pretty boy, you like me too much.”
Jason feels almost bitter at the truth behind the statement. “You’re way too confident in that.”
Roy just hums in response, sitting back in his chair. The rest of their subway ride goes on with minimal bickering and Roy taking a Power Nap on Jason’s shoulder. The latter enjoys taking photos and sending them over to Kori to enjoy when she is back on-world.
Jason shakes Roy awake and essentially leads him through the station until he hits the exit and turns to Roy with an expectant look.
“Let’s get some food first,” Roy says, interlocking his hand with Jason’s in what the latter assumes is a genuinely random direction. Roy ends up leading them to a cute diner, taking the corner most table.
“Dinah says she used to love a diner near the station, I wonder if this one is it,” Roy says conversationally and Jason still can’t quite figure out what the archer wants.
“She has the best taste out of you Star City bunch, so I hope so,” Jason replies, suddenly feeling flustered as Roy hands him a menu. “Why are we here?” Jason asks, baffled.
“Because we’re hungry?” Roy raises an eyebrow, looking at Jason like the latter should expect it to be that simple. “Pizza?” The archer questions, tilting his head.
“If you say so,” Jason agrees and Roy lets out a long sigh at Jason’s awkwardness. “You know I’ll eat anything. Don’t look at me like that!” Jason adds, mild offence written on his face which just makes Roy laugh.
Roy orders the food and pays, which inevitably causes a small argument as they debate whose turn it is. Roy complains that even when it is Roy’s turn the vigilante complains, which Jason concedes. They eat with random topics filling their conversation. Jason nearly chokes on a piece of pepperoni when a little girl walks by with her father and asks why the ginger man was trying to ‘be gangster.’ Roy turns his hat the right way after that, waving off the father as he apologises, albeit still looking embarrassed while doing so. Roy complains that Jason was no help whatsoever whilst Jason wheezes, out of breath. Roy gives him a fond look when Jason wipes his eyes, stating that, “It truly wasn’t that funny, but it was also fucking hilarious.”
They leave the diner after around an hour. Roy takes Jason’s hand again as they begin to walk farther into the city. Jason takes a moment to simply pretend that this is life all the time, doing mundane things with Roy showing him place after place, having interactions with strangers that light up your entire day.
“Any guesses where we’re heading, pretty boy?”
“To get a pony?”
“I keep telling you, you need a big garden to have a pony.”
“You just crushed my dreams so easily.”
Roy huffs out a laugh as he continues to lead Jason through a few streets of various aesthetics. Jason’s confusion grows as they begin to near the collection of theatres in the east of the city and Roy begins to slow his pace. Roy comes to a stop outside of a theatre with colourful hanging banners and white italic writing that Jason has to squint to read. A theatre production of ‘Pride and Prejudice’ and ‘Sense and Sensibility’. When Jason looks back to Roy the archer is smiling and holding their intertwined hands up in between them. “This has to count as me reading Pride and Prejudice.”
Jason can only stare at Roy, looking so incredibly excited about something that Jason knows he has minimal interest in. Yet, he looks genuinely happy and Jason doesn’t know how to react, had never expected anyone to truly care, to know something so basic about him and indulge it. Jason bites the inside of his cheek as Roy’s smile turns to concern, but cuts him off before the archer can open his mouth. “I’ll accept it, just this once.”
Roy swings their interlocked hands and plants a kiss on Jason’s knuckles before heading into the theatre. Jason wishes that it could be real, even just for a moment. But for now, he’s happy to pretend for a few hours.