Chapter Text
Pacing the brief length of Gabriel’s hotel room, Adrien finished his booking with the taxi company and pocketed his phone. It was tempting to take it out again and ring them back, tell them he’d changed his mind. He wasn’t about to let this madness go any further. He wasn’t about to take Gabriel to see Nathalie.
But he had to. His traitorous conscience was screaming at him, reminding him that this wasn’t about him and what he felt comfortable with. After the earful Nathalie had given him about the kids’ right to make their own decision about whether to speak to Gabriel…. Nathalie had the same right.
And she’d chosen to see him.
Although God only knew why.
Or why Adrien had decided to come here.
He rubbed his forehead, too aware of Gabriel watching him from his seat at the vanity. His brows were knitted together like he was trying to work out the solution to a difficult problem. It was a look he’d given Adrien all through his childhood.
No – not quite. Growing up, he’d always felt like it was his fault his father didn’t understand him. Now, all Adrien saw in his eyes was curiosity.
He cleared his throat. ‘The car will be here in a few minutes.’
Gabriel’s expression didn’t change. ‘Why do you take cabs? Can’t you just fly us over?’
He could, but…. ‘I’m not carrying you while I’m transformed.’ There were levels of strangeness, and that one was about ten stages past the one they’d already reached.
Mercifully without argument, Gabriel got up to fetch his shoes – strangely sensible looking things that bore no marks of a designer. In fact, none of his clothes appeared to have a label.
Though, when Adrien took a moment to study them, there was something familiar about them. Something that spoke of the man wearing them. It seemed he hadn’t stopped designing clothes, after all. He’d just stopped selling them.
Gabriel sat on the edge of the bed to put on his shoes, speaking without looking up. ‘I’m glad you had Nathalie after I left. I always knew if anything happened to me, she’d look after you.’
‘She didn’t.’
Gabriel went still. ‘Then who did?’
‘Nino’s parents. His family moved into the mansion to take care of me.’
He frowned like he was trying to remember who Nino was. ‘You mean the boy who told me I should give you a birthday party?’
‘The one and only.’
‘You’re still friends?’
‘Yep.’ Never had Adrien taken so much pleasure in uttering a single syllable.
Gabriel carried on with his shoes. ‘What happened to Nathalie, then?’
‘I bought her an apartment, paid her a monthly stipend so she could survive, and didn’t talk to her for twenty-three years.’
‘…what made you get back in touch with her?’
‘The war. We needed somewhere to hide and….’ Adrien exhaled, releasing the heaviness that piled up every time he talked about this tired subject. ‘Honestly, I just didn’t have the energy to be angry at her anymore.’
Finishing with his shoes, Gabriel stood up, locking eyes with him from across the room. ‘So you forgave her.’
There was so much hope in those words that Adrien felt it stirring in his heart, as if it were his own.
He swallowed. The silence that followed Gabriel’s statement was like tiny insects, millions of them, crawling on his arms – making him so uncomfortable that his mouth started to open, to form a reply.
Thank God, his phone buzzed, stopping him before he could say anything stupid. He pulled it from his pocket and read the message that had come through.
‘The cab’s downstairs,’ he said, and he turned for the door, finally escaping that claustrophobic hotel room.
As they headed downstairs, Gabriel had the grace not to speak. When they reached the car, Adrien offered Gabriel the passenger seat, as if he were the guest of honour, while Adrien sat in the back.
Alone.
Silent, he watched the early evening scenery fly by, half taking in the details. All those buildings, shielding whatever went on behind their walls. All those people carrying their private thoughts in their heads. Hell, even the roads had their secrets, their solidness hiding the network of tunnels that ran beneath the city.
When the car stopped at a traffic light, a pedestrian glanced Adrien’s way, observing him the way he was observing them – a reminder that to everyone else, Adrien was the other. No one important, just another person they didn’t know, didn’t understand.
Then the car started driving again, and Adrien sank so deep into himself that he hardly noticed the rest of the journey. Before he knew it, they were pulling up outside Nathalie’s apartment building. He climbed out of the cab, paying the driver and standing back as the car left him behind….
With Gabriel.
He was actually out here with Gabriel.
After everything that had happened, he’d volunteered to go somewhere with Gabriel. Like this was a normal father-son outing.
Disgust warred with warmth in his heart, and he turned away, heading for the front door without checking that Gabriel was following him.
In the lobby, Adrien made for the lift, pausing so Gabriel could catch up. He was slower than he used to be. Slow like older people often were. Difficult as it was to believe, Gabriel really had been caught by the same monster that came for everyone, eventually – age.
They boarded the lift, and Adrien pushed the button for Nathalie’s floor. Beside him, Gabriel’s posture was rigid, his head held high even for him. Like he was forcing an image of confidence that he didn’t feel.
Perhaps that was what he’d always done. Perhaps everything that had ever been Gabriel Agreste had been an act, as much a costume as Hawk Moth or any of his other demented incarnations.
Again, Adrien’s heart stirred with a cocktail of confusing emotions, not helped when the lift doors opened. As he led Gabriel down the hall to Nathalie’s door, it hit him. This wasn’t just about fathers and sons. This was about mothers, too – sort of. For the first time in decades, he would be sitting in a room with both his remaining parental figures.
Unable to help himself, he glanced at Gabriel. The man was sweating, actually sweating. He was shaking out his shirt as if to cool himself off. He couldn’t have advertised his nervousness more if he’d paid for a billboard.
‘She’s not going to bite your head off,’ Adrien said, unsure why he was saying it. Unsure why he was trying to make Gabriel feel better.
‘This may sound strange,’ Gabriel said, ‘but I’m more afraid of her forgiveness. At least I know what to do with anger.’
Again, Adrien’s mouth hung open, words failing him. Deciding there was no reply he could give, he turned to the door and rang the bell. Sometimes, if there was something you didn’t want to do, it was best to get it over with.
As usual these days, it took some time for Nathalie to answer. Then came the familiar click-click-click of her unfastening the numerous locks she’d installed. Each one sounded like a clock ticking down the seconds until an explosion.
Adrien clasped his hands together, fighting to remain calm. A little voice in his head said he didn’t need to stay for the reunion. It was between Gabriel and Nathalie, not him. But he couldn’t do that to her. He couldn’t leave her alone with…whatever this was.
A new sound pulled him from his thoughts, redirecting his attention to the door. It opened slowly, as if the person on the other side expected some prank, some attack. Then – there she was, leaning on her walking stick.
Gabriel gasped, and her gaze snapped onto him. Her skin paled, now even more pallid than usual, though her eyes were brighter than Adrien had ever seen them – sharp and focused as she stared at the man she’d once loved. The man she’d hated. The man she likely still loved, despite all he’d done to her.
‘Nathalie….’ Gabriel breathed out her name like a prayer.
She didn’t respond. Maybe she couldn’t. What the hell did you say to a charming sociopath who’d been banished to another dimension, then come back?
Nothing normal, that was for sure.
Adrien glanced between them, not simply his father and sort-of stepmother but two people with a complicated history. Bearing in mind the inevitable conversation topics, they really needed to get out of the hall.
‘May we come in?’ Adrien asked.
Nathalie continued to stare at Gabriel, her voice distant and thin. ‘Yes. Yes, of course.’ She stepped aside, moving like she was sleepwalking.
Biting his lip, Adrien pushed past her into the living room. Following him, Gabriel’s footsteps were tentative, like he wasn’t sure any of this was real. Like it only looked like an apartment, and when he crossed the threshold, it would transform into some underworld chamber.
In the room, Adrien shut the door. Then he put an arm around Nathalie and led her to the armchair, leaning her walking stick against it as he helped her sit down. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Gabriel watching them. Watching Nathalie. Studying her frailty – the damage he was partly responsible for.
When Adrien was certain Nathalie was comfortable, he turned around, calling Gabriel out with his own stare. Gabriel looked away, indelicately sitting on the sofa across from her. With nowhere else to go, Adrien sat with him – but on the other end, pressing himself against the sofa arm.
Silence fell over them. Not the pleasant kind, but the kind that made Adrien want to hurl himself out the window and onto the terrace. But with all the locks she’d installed, it wouldn’t be a quick exit. It’d probably be even more awkward than…whatever this was.
Just when it seemed no one would ever speak again, Nathalie said, ‘You look older.’
Gabriel cracked a smile. ‘So do you – but you’re still beautiful.’
Adrien nearly choked, his eyes rounding at the colour blooming in Nathalie’s cheeks. A few flattering words, and she looked about thirty years younger, giving a glimpse of the woman she’d once been. Not an evil supervillain but a human being, like Adrien or Marinette, who’d loved and lost the way so many people did.
In a flash, an alternative version of events ran through Adrien’s head. A timeline where Gabriel had made different choices. A timeline where he’d moved the fuck on.
Nathalie leaned on the arm of the chair. ‘Adrien told me your story.’
That was a clever way of wording it. Even if Hugo insisted that Gabriel was being honest for a change, there were still too many unknowns. There was still that nagging feeling that there was a twist hidden in his outlandish tale, waiting to be revealed at an opportune moment.
‘He told me a little about you, too,’ Gabriel said, ‘though not what you’ve been doing with your time.’
‘There isn’t a lot to tell,’ Nathalie said in that prosaic way of hers. ‘I read a lot.’
‘You always did love books.’
‘And I crochet.’
He blinked at her. ‘You what?’ He said this like she’d just told him she baked kittens in pies.
A small smile peeked out of her mouth. ‘It’s quite a different world you’ve come back to.’
‘So I’m seeing….’ He appeared to be reassessing her – trying to mesh this new Nathalie with the one he remembered. Finally, he shook his head. ‘You know, I expected things to have changed over the years, but I never imagined….’
‘I would become domestic?’
‘Indeed. Or that sentibeings would be openly accepted into mainstream society. Or that my grandchildren would have magic abilities.’ He glanced Adrien’s way, surely catching the way Adrien winced at his casual use of the word grandchildren.
‘I wouldn’t have imagined it either,’ Nathalie said. ‘But I think we both underestimated your two sons.’
This time, it was Gabriel who winced, perhaps at the reminder that there was still Felix to deal with.
Felix, whom he’d once threatened to disappear.
A fact none of them could afford to forget. Dying or not, the man sharing on the other end of the sofa had still tried to kill Felix. He’d still hurt Marinette. He was dangerous.
Gabriel turned to him, his piercing gaze hauling him out of his thoughts. ‘I’ve been reading about you both, you know. About what you achieved during and after the war. What you did in that courtroom was truly a tour de force. But what you did as Cat Noir was…miraculous. It’s a tragedy that you can’t publicly take the credit for such accomplishments.’
Adrien shifted on the sofa. ‘There are only so many secrets I can share.’
Gabriel nodded, though his eyes said he’d heard something more in Adrien’s words. ‘You really have turned out to be an incredible man, Adrien.’
Adrien’s stomach flipflopped, and he gripped the sofa arm like a life raft in a storm. ‘I don’t need praise.’
‘Of course you do. Everyone does. Anyway, it’s about the only thing I have left to give you these days. That, and apologies.’
He hurled the words like arrows – and they found their mark, deep inside Adrien’s heart. Some younger part of him welcomed the onslaught of belated pride. The older part of him hated himself for it.
In a soft voice, Nathalie asked, ‘How much time do you have, Gabriel?’
His attention jerked back to her, and something flickered in his eyes. ‘I’m not sure. Perhaps a while. Perhaps not long at all. Either way….’
‘You’re dying.’ The statement came out flat, though there was an undertone of indefinable emotion.
‘I suppose we all are. I’m just doing it sooner than you.’ He gave her a tired smile, like a man who’d had a long time to come to terms with his mortality and now was simply waiting for the clock to run out.
‘Are you in pain?’
‘All the time.’ From the glimmer in his eyes, he didn’t mean physically. He leaned forward on his knees. ‘Nathalie. I wanted to tell you –’
She stopped him with a wave of her hand. ‘It’s alright, Gabriel. You don’t need to.’
‘But I want to.’ For the first time since he’d returned, his voice carried its former passion, a reminder of the man he’d once been. ‘I never treated you right. I knew how you felt about me, and…I used that. I’m not saying I never felt anything for you in return, but…. I was so focused on an ideal that I couldn’t see what I had right there.’
His gaze darted from Nathalie to Adrien, then back to Nathalie. ‘I loved Emilie. Nothing will ever change that. But when she was gone…I should’ve let her go. I just – I couldn’t. I never – I never felt like there was closure.’
‘Because you felt guilty,’ Nathalie said. ‘You felt you’d killed her.’
He dropped his head, as if weighed down by his regrets. ‘Yes.’
Such a simple answer, yet Adrien felt it like a fist in his gut.
Not for the first time, he imagined what he would do if he found himself in Gabriel’s position. If something happened to Marinette, or even one of the children. He couldn’t be certain he wouldn’t resort to the same desperate measures as the man currently crumpling on the other end of the sofa.
Nathalie sighed, her posture softening. ‘Gabriel. I know all of this. I always have. I’ve never been angry with you for it.’
Gabriel stilled, silence blanketing them again.
When he finally lifted his head, his eyes were glistening. And when they locked onto Nathalie’s gaze, something passed between them that was too private, too them to bear.
Adrien jumped to his feet. ‘You know what? I just realised – I should let Marinette know I’m going to be late home. I’m just going to…. I’ll just be on the terrace.’
They continued to stare at each other.
It was definitely time to duck out.
Without another word, he left the room, hurrying down the hallway to the backdoor and letting himself out. Exhaling heavily, he leaned on the terrace railing and gazed out at the city. Only a few metres away was the spot where he’d once been killed. But today, the memories came without emotion. It was just something that had once happened to him.
Just like everything that Gabriel had done to him and the others, in the past.
Just like this would be someday.
Plagg flew out from his jacket, the look on his face suggesting he thought otherwise. ‘You okay, kid?’
Adrien dragged a hand down his face. ‘Yeah, I just…. I needed to get out of there.’
‘I don’t blame you. I was counting down the seconds until we could leave.’ He glanced at Adrien’s pocket. ‘Maybe you should call Marinette. You weren’t really lying when you said she’d be wondering where you are.’
He made a good point.
Adrien pulled out his phone, admiring the red and gold and pink of the sunset as he waited for Marinette to answer.
She picked up on the third ring. ‘Hey.’
‘Hey,’ he said, hoping he sounded steadier than he felt.
‘Oh no. What’s happened?’
He should’ve known he couldn’t fool her. ‘I just – I went to see Gabriel after work.’
There was silence down the line.
Then – ‘You’re kidding.’
‘I wish I were.’
Again, she went quiet. Maybe she was trying to determine whether to send for reinforcements. Finally, she asked, ‘Where are you now?’
‘Nathalie’s. He wanted to see her.’
‘Oh, wow. Adrien, that…. That must be….’
‘It is.’ It was everything she wasn’t saying, and more besides. ‘I thought they could use some privacy, so I left them in there. I’m on the terrace, now, just…giving them space.’
‘And giving yourself space. God, this…. This is huge, Adrien. Are you sure you’re not rushing it?’
‘Oh, I’m sure I am. But I don’t feel like I have a choice.’
Just like he’d never really had a choice when it came to Gabriel.
He gripped the railing. ‘He’s dying, Marinette. Talking to him today…. Hugo’s right. You can hear the sincerity. You can hear it in everything he says, and – I don’t know what to do with it. It was one thing, having him in another dimension, but…. He’s not coming back, this time. He’s dying. My father is dying.’
Only when the words were out of his mouth did he catch what he’d said. My father. Not Gabriel, but father.
When, when had he started thinking of him like that again?
‘Oh Adrien.’ Marinette’s voice was warm and thick with sympathy. ‘I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry you’re having to go through this.’
His eyes watered, and he rubbed at the corners. ‘I just – I don’t know what to feel. Part of me keeps remembering all the awful things he did, and I just – I want to tell him to fuck off back where he came from. But….’
Panic seared his heart, and his fist clenched the railing tighter as he forced out his confession. ‘Another part just keeps thinking – he’s dying! He’s dying, and then that’s it! When he’s gone, that’s the end! There won’t be another chance to make things better. But – but there isn’t a chance now! It’s too late! It’s too fucking late, and I –’
The sound of thunder cracked straight through his words, swallowing the rest of his speech. It was so loud that the ground shook, threatening to knock him off his feet.
Leaning hard against the railing, Adrien squeezed his eyes shut, fighting to maintain balance as he waited for the tremor to pass. Even when the monstrous noise faded, his hearing was cloudy. It was hard to say how long Marinette had been calling his name before he became aware of it.
‘Adrien?’ Her voice had risen an octave with worry. ‘Adrien, talk to me – are you okay?’
Slowly, he opened his eyes, finding Plagg staring at him in alarm.
Adrien opened his mouth to reply, to reassure Marinette that he was fine – when there was a second crack of thunder, this one even louder than before.
He clapped his hands over his ears, his pulse thumping and his heart racing. Breathless, every worry about Gabriel scurried to the back of his mind as he stared over the city….
Watching the sky rip open again.