Chapter Text
I still remember the third of December.
Me in your sweater, you said it looked better on me than it did you,
Only if you knew how much I liked you…
The halls of Calabasas High School were colder than usual, the kind of chill that seeped into the bones and made Cooper’s fingers tremble as he shoved books into his locker. He hadn’t thought to grab a sweater that morning, fooled by the look of the bright, sunny sky into thinking it was going to be a warm day, and now his burgundy long-sleeved shirt felt like thin paper against his skin.
“Boo!”
Cooper flinched, his books clattering to the floor as a familiar, teasing laugh rang out behind him. He turned to find Nicholas grinning, his eyes gleaming with mischief.
“Jesus, Nick.” Cooper muttered, crouching to gather his things but not before throwing his friend a scolding glare. “You scared me.” If the boy wouldn’t have been his best friend, Cooper would’ve punched his handsome, cute face. Or a regular face. Because Cooper didn't find his friend's face cute, like in a weird way!
As matter of fact it was pretty basic. He has seen better.
Nicholas crouched beside him, scooping up all the textbooks, not letting Cooper pick them up. “Should’ve seen your face.” He chuckled, but his amusement quickly faded as he looked Cooper up and down, noticing that he was shivering. “Forgot your sweater again?”
He was always cold, but the weather always threatened to freeze him to death during the holidays. Even if he was bundled up with thousands of layers. But Cooper also had the habit of forgetting his sweater, almost like if he unconsciously wanted to catch a cold.
Cooper nodded, his cheeks tinged pink; whether from the cold or embarrassment. He wasn’t sure. They stood up once they collected Cooper’s books off the floor. Nicholas peeled off his own sweater, the brisk movement causing the boy’s shirt to rise, flashing Cooper planes of hard muscle that hid underneath it.
He blinked a couple of times before noticing Nicholas was holding out the garment that made his body shiver just by imagining its warmth.
“Here. You’re shaking like a leaf.”
“I’m fine.” Cooper started, wrapping his arms around himself, but Nicholas raised an eyebrow, daring him to refuse.
“Don’t be stubborn. Take it. You look like you’re about to freeze to death.”
Cooper hesitated, glancing at the sweater. “Won’t you be cold?”
“I run hot.” Nicholas shrugged. That was true. He burned like a furnace while Cooper gradually melted like ice beside him. Nicholas stepped closer, his body heat following.“Take it before you turn into an icicle and make us late for class.”
Cooper relented, pulling the sweater over his head. It was warm, soft, and carried Nicholas’s unmistakable scent ; a mixture of cedarwood from his cologne and something uniquely him. His body shivered at the delighted and welcoming embrace of warmth. It was Nicholas' favorite sweater, an oversized, navy-blue hoodie that almost appeared black in some certain lightings, and had white angel wings embroidered on the top left side of the chest.
He felt so toasty.
“Thanks.” Cooper mumbled, tugging at the long sleeves.
“No problem, baby.” Nicholas said, before throwing his arm over his shoulders to walk him to their first period as the last warning bell rang. He tried to ignore the way his stomach twisted pleasantly at the petname.
But Cooper didn't hesitate to snuggle up against Nicholas’ side.
_____________________
The next few days, Cooper found himself unwilling—no, unable—to give the sweater back. It was ridiculous, really, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. Sharing clothes had always been a normal thing between them. Ever since they became best friends, they’d swapped hoodies, jackets, even hats without a second thought. But this time was different.
He wasn’t sure how, but it had been happening quite frequently.
Maybe it was a sign of how much things were shifting between them. Cooper and Nicholas had been friends for a long time, things were bound to change, right? It was completely normal.
Right?
The thought pulled him back to the beginning, to how they became friends in the first place.
They’d first met in middle school, though back then they were in completely different circles.
Cooper and Nicholas existed on the fringes of each other’s lives, just fleeting glances exchanged across boisterous hallways and the chaotic schoolyard. Nothing notable.
Nothing that suggested they’d one day become inseparable.
It wasn’t until Mrs. Castillo—known for being the only dance teacher in the school—decided to moonlight as the part-time drama teacher, that they were finally brought together. She announced auditions for a play, and Cooper had signed up the second the list went up. His name was the first on the sheet, written with bold, confident strokes. Acting was his dream, his passion, and he was certain he’d get the role he wanted.
But reality had other plans. Cooper didn’t land the role. His voice was too high-pitched and “too soft” as they’d bluntly said, costing him the lead role. Instead, he was cast in a minor part, the younger brother of another character.
Disappointed but undeterred, Cooper threw himself into the role. Acting was acting, after all. And as long as he got to act, he’d play any part.
As his grandfather would say— There’s no small roles, only small actors.
And then he found out who would be playing his older brother: Nicholas.
Nicholas was quiet, almost unnervingly so. He walked through the halls with an expression that could only be described as perpetually annoyed, as though the entire world was just a little too loud for his liking. Nicholas, back then, had been a short, round-faced kid with shaggy brown hair that caught the sun and sometimes turned golden in its light. His dark, big, slanted eyes were unreadable, almost blank, but there was kindness in them if one looked closely enough. And his smile, rare and fleeting as it was, had a way of making a person feel like they were the only person in the world.
(That smile made Cooper’s stomach flutter in a way he didn’t understand at the time. Or even now.)
Nicholas wasn’t the type to stand out, not in the way Cooper did. He preferred to keep to himself and a few friends that Cooper could easily count on one hand. But there was something about him—something that made it impossible for Cooper or anyone to ignore him.
And if Cooper wanted to be the greatest actor the world had ever seen, he reasoned, he needed to take his work seriously. If they were to play brothers, then they had to at least become acquaintances, if not friends.
Cooper started seeking Nicholas out whenever he could. They shared a homeroom, so that was easy enough. Lunchtime was trickier. Nicholas spent most of his breaks on the soccer field, surrounded by his friends. Cooper, who had all the coordination of a newborn giraffe, had never been good at soccer. He preferred tennis, where speed and long limbs were assets rather than liabilities.
But that didn’t stop him from joining. Except Nicholas’s friends made it abundantly clear they didn’t want Cooper around.
They teased him for his clumsiness, laughed when he missed the ball, and tried to push him out of their games as they deemed him too girly. Which wasn’t something new, Cooper was often bullied for it.
Strangely, Nicholas didn’t.
Nicholas never told Cooper to leave. He never complained when Cooper followed him around like an overjoyed puppy following its newfound owner, trying to strike up conversations. And even though Nicholas rarely spoke more than a handful of words at a time, he always made sure Cooper was beside him and on his team during soccer games. No matter how bad Cooper was at the game.
Eventually, they became friends. It wasn’t quick, and it wasn’t easy. Nicholas was stubborn, hard to read, and slow to trust. But maybe, Cooper thought, Nicholas eventually realized that he couldn’t get rid of him. He stopped trying to stay distant and instead resigned himself to Cooper’s relentless method acting.
Either way, they became friends.
From that point on, they were inseparable.
Not even puberty could change that. They stuck together through awkward phases, braces, bad haircuts, and questionable fashion choices. High school didn’t change it either, nor did the string of girlfriends Nicholas had over the years. Not even when Cooper, one night, finally mustered the courage to admit he wasn’t straight—an anxious confession he’d rehearsed a hundred times in the mirror.
He simply couldn’t stomach the thought of another double date Nicholas was trying to rope him into.
But nothing changed.
They were in Nicholas’s bedroom, having one of their usual sleepovers. Cooper had been restless, the weight of his secret pressing on his chest, while Nicholas lounged sprawled out on the bed like a starfish, casually eating popcorn as if Cooper had just mentioned tomorrow’s weather forecast.
Nicholas had simply blinked at him, then hummed pensively. “I think she might know a guy, but he’ll have to be approved by me, of course. I need to make sure he’s good enough for you.”
Cooper’s mouth fell open in surprise. He’d been bracing himself for something else entirely.
From where he sat curled in the corner of the bed, Cooper bit his lower lip, unsure how to process his friend’s calm reaction.
“You’re not… weirded out?” He asked hesitantly.
“Why would I be?” Nicholas stopped chewing, his brows knitting together in confusion as he turned to face him.
“Because I’m gay.” Cooper mumbled, his shoulders hunching inward. They both fell silent, simply staring into each other’s eyes.
Some might find Nicholas’s dark eyes intimidating, even scary, but the way he looked at Cooper with such tenderness and adoration, it made it impossible to feel afraid.
Cooper could lose himself in that dark beautiful abyss. Forever, if he could.
Nicholas shrugged as if it were the simplest thing in the world and smiled. “So what? You’re still you. My Cooper .” He uttered the last word almost possessively.
His stomach flipped and toes curled at the low impercitable growl. Before Cooper could respond, Nicholas reached over and pulled him into a tight hug, holding him as if nothing had changed.
Cooper laughed it off, masking just how much those words and that embrace meant to him.
He wrapped his arms around Nicholas’s neck, and let out a deep breath of relief, feeling like a huge weight lift off his shoulders. Cooper tried to pull away, but Nicholas hugged him tighter, refusing to let him go.
And just like that, the air between them remained exactly the same—no tension, no awkwardness.
Because no matter how many girlfriends Nicholas had, no matter how unattainable he sometimes seemed, Cooper knew one thing with absolute certainty: They loved each other, and nothing—not time, not secrets, not anyone, could ever come between them.
Perhaps that was the reason why he couldn’t return the sweater. It felt as though every stitch, every thread of polyester, was infused with their history—years of love and friendship woven into its fabric. When he wore it, it enveloped him perfectly, like a comforting embrace. It was a bit big, sure, but to him, it was just right.
Nicholas had long since shed the soft edges of boyhood, his baby fat replaced by a tall, broad-shouldered frame packed with muscle—a transformation Cooper sometimes found hard to ignore. Especially, when Nicholas would work out in front of him…while shirtless.
He was glad that Nicholas felt comfortable around him, but sometimes he was too comfortable. (Not that he was complaining but…you know.)
Cooper had eyes and it was hard to pretend not too.
So of course, Nicholas’s sweater—or his clothes in general—fit Cooper a tad bit bigger.
They were the same height, but where Nicholas was broad and solid, Cooper was slimmer and lean.
If he was being honest, he liked their size difference. Maybe way too much and lately, he’d been thinking about it more than he cared to admit, especially at night.
“You’ve been wearing that sweater for three days straight.”
Cooper jumped, startled by the voice of his twin brother, and nearly dropped the glass of water he’d come downstairs for. He’d gotten distracted, leaning against the cool white marble of the kitchen counter, lost in the scent of Nicholas’s musk that lingered on the collar of the oversized hoodie he wore beneath a thin nightshirt. It hung long enough to nearly hide the cotton shorts he had on beneath it.
Payton strolled past him, pouring a glass of milk and snatching a handful of cookies from the cookie jar, all while shooting him a pointed look.
In truth, Cooper had been wearing the sweater for almost a month, but Payton didn’t need to know that.
“I like this sweater. It’s comfy.” Cooper said quickly.
“It stinks.” Payton retorted, scrunching his nose.
Now, that was a lie. Cooper made sure the sweater stayed clean, careful not to lose Nicholas’s scent. He only ever wore it after a shower.
“You stink.” Cooper shot back, rolling his eyes.
Payton scoffed and gave him a weak punch on the shoulder. Cooper retaliated with a stronger one, earning a glare and another hit in return.
“Ow!” Cooper glared, lifting an arm in defense but froze when noticing a knowing smirk creeping across Payton’s lips. That smile meant trouble. Cooper tensed, fidgeting under his twin’s stare, already plotting an escape back to his room.
“Wait a minute...” Payton’s smirk widened as he leaned closer to get a good view of the sweater. “Isn’t that Nicholas’ sweater?”
“No.” The answer came too quickly, and Cooper knew he’d messed up.
Payton laughed, far too hard for Cooper’s liking.
He was about to leave, not wanting to give Payton the satisfaction of teasing him, because of course, Payton knew about the old crush Cooper had on Nicholas—back when he was still figuring out his sexuality and had confided in his twin, who had been going through the same thing.
The problem was, Payton never forgot. Worse, he never believed Cooper when he insisted he’d moved on from that silly, long-forgotten crush.
“Why don’t you two just date already. Put us out of our misery watching you pine for each other. It’s disgusting.” Payton suggested, dunking his cookies into his milk, and still smiling.
“We are just friends.” Cooper said firmly. He licked his lips, his heart aching at the words as they left his mouth. “Nothing more, Payton.”
“ Denial.” Payton sing-songed, drawing out the last syllables with a smirk. He scoffed, growing annoyed by his brother's behavior.
Cooper abandoned his empty glass on the counter and started toward the stairs. But he halted midway, spinning back around and wrapping his arms around himself.
“Nicholas is straight.” He said, the words rushing out, tinged with bitterness of the truth. “He likes girls. And in case you forgot, I’m not exactly a girl.” Cooper attempted to laugh, but it came out dry and cracked at the end.
And he hated himself for it. There was no reason to feel heartbroken over the fact that Nicholas would never see him in a different light—would never feel the same way Cooper felt about him. The blame lay with his traitorous heart, which stubbornly refused to understand that Nicholas was unreachable.
But it didn’t matter. It couldn’t. Cooper had managed to bury these feelings for years, locking them away in a corner of himself where they couldn’t hurt him. He’d keep them there, sealed tight, until they withered and died.
Payton sighed heavily, the teasing in his expression softening. “I don’t know who’s more oblivious and in deep denial—you, my dear brother, or Nicholas.”
Cooper clenched his jaw, refusing to let the words sink in. He wouldn’t entertain the idea. It was impossible. It didn’t matter anyway, because he and Nicholas were just friends.
That was all they’d ever be, and he was content with that. Even if the truth made his heart hurt.
“Are you done with your little movie inside your head?” He snapped, his voice tight and ears burning. “Because I’m tired, and I have school tomorrow.”
Payton’s smirk faded into a sad smile, but he didn’t say anything more.
Cooper turned and left.
Eventually, guilt won out, and Cooper returned the sweater, though not without a pang of reluctance. After the conversation with his brother, he couldn’t shake the feeling that keeping it was doing him more harm than good. It wasn’t just a sweater—it had become a constant reminder of emotions he had no business holding onto.
Of course, Nicholas took it back. Why wouldn’t he? The sweater was his, and Cooper had no real excuse to give for wanting to keep it.
“Here. Totally forgot to return it.” Cooper handed the sweater over, freshly washed and folded into a precise square. He kept his tone as casual as possible. “Thank you for letting me borrow it.
Nicholas took it with a boyish-grin. “You sure? I was starting to feel like you were going to keep it permanently.”
“Don’t tempt me.” Cooper warned, and the way Nicholas smiled brightly made his stomach flip. Ugh, how he hated that smile.
Nicholas’s lips curved into a playful smirk as he leaned against the row of lockers. “Looked way better on you anyway.”
He rolled his eyes, masking the flutter in his chest and slammed his locker shut.“Everything looks better on me.” Cooper stated, sassily.
Nicholas laughed, the sound rich and contagious. “Can’t argue with that.” Cooper’s stomach did another somersault watching Nicholas slanted big dark eyes roam down his body as he bit his bottom lip.
That was completely normal. Friends checked each other out all the time…Cooper often did it. It didn’t mean anything.
A sudden surge of confidence lit him up as Nicholas trailed behind him on their way to class, a smug smile creeping across Cooper’s face. He totally ignored the way their hands brushed together as they walked. But he didn’t pull away.
Neither did Nicholas.
____________________
Lunch the next day was as noisy and chaotic as ever. Cooper and Nicholas sat at their usual table, tucked in the far corner of the cafeteria, away from the clamor of chattering teenagers.
Nicholas had never outgrown his introverted nature, always preferring solitude and silence—except when it came to Cooper.
Nicholas always told him that Cooper was his peace inside his guarded bubble. Made him feel comfortable to be loud and himself without feeling judged. And Cooper took great pride in knowing he was able to provide that for his friend.
Their trays were stacked with greasy pizza, the scent of melted cheese and pepperoni cutting through the cafeteria’s din. Nicholas had managed to snag extra slices by flashing his signature grin at the lunch lady—a grin Cooper swore could charm just about anyone into anything.
“Are you auditioning?” Nicholas asked, tearing into his last slice of pizza. Grease slicked his long fingers, and a streak of marinara marked the corner of his mouth. Cooper wrinkled his nose at Nicholas’ messy eating.
The corner of Nicholas' mouth curled, knowing he was silently judging him. He nudged Cooper’s untouched tray, a silent hint for him to eat. Cooper never liked eating at school, not even when he packed his own lunch. He nudged his milk carton aside after taking a small, reluctant sip to appease his friends' worry.“Not sure.” He said lightly.
Flyers had appeared that morning, taped to every wall in the building, announcing auditions for an adaptation of a new play.
Cooper was very much excited as much as the rest of the other students from his theatre class but the nerves ate at him, extinguishing all his glee and courage to even consider the thought of auditioning.
He was always given roles that he didn’t want, which was fine, he wasn’t entitled to always play lead roles. But he knew they gave him background characters due to his sexuality, he wasn’t exactly saying the board was homophobic, but Cooper wouldn’t put it past them. Because there was no way in hell that Shawn-who-has-a-stick-up-his-ass could act better than him.
The guy could barely remember his lines and always butchered them. Nicholas agreed, to the point he had once tried convincing Shawn to drop the role and pass it down to Cooper, who would actually do it justice—except his method wasn’t exactly ‘school-friendly’.
So they both wound up with detention for a week and warned to never do it again or they would be kicked out of their drama club.
To say the least, their parents weren’t happy, nor was Cooper. Nicholas showed no signs of regret, he actually seemed proud of himself. He couldn’t fathom why, Nicholas just simply shrugged with a secret smile dancing on his lips when he had asked.
Hearing Nicholas clear his throat, Cooper broke out of his thoughts.
“You should.” Nicholas suggested with a shrug, the seriousness in his voice betrayed the casualness of his words.
Cooper glanced up, catching that weight in Nicholas’s expression. “Are you?”
“Only if you do. Otherwise, what’s the point?” Nicholas said around a mouthful of pizza, staring into his eyes with such seriousness that it made him avert his eyes away. He even ignored the nasty habit.
“You don’t have to do that.” Cooper murmured, though his chest tightened at the thought. He loved acting, but somehow it wasn’t the same without Nick by his side.
There was something deeply comforting about knowing his best friend was only an arm’s length or a few feet away—ready to ground him whenever the spotlight felt too bright, or when his thoughts spiraled and left him stuck in his head.
Nicholas waved him off with a flick of his pizza crust. “We’re a package deal, remember?”
They were. Always had been. Their parents had even made up guest rooms for them long ago, though neither had ever used them. It was routine now—an unspoken agreement.
They’d sneak into each other’s beds under the guise of staving off boredom or loneliness, until they accepted the fact they couldn’t stay separated by walls, leaving behind the flimsy excuses.
Nicholas’s arm would always find its way around Cooper’s waist during their sleep, pulling them close until their bodies were pressed together. And though mornings brought an unacknowledged awkwardness, neither of them stopped. They simply ignored it, pretending the way their bodies reacted to their closeness was normal.
Cooper smiled at Nicholas.
“You’re not eating that, are you?” Nicholas gestured to the untouched slice on Cooper’s tray, already finished through his second.
Cooper pushed the tray toward him. “Go for it, you bottomless pit.”
“Awesome.” Nicholas beamed, grabbing the slice. Cooper couldn’t help but zero on the smudge of sauce still clinging to the corner of his mouth. Nicholas devoured his pizza with unrestrained enthusiasm, while Cooper couldn’t help but stare, the tiny imperfection making Nicholas look… endearing.
“You’ve got sauce on your stupid face.” He said, pointing.
”Excuse me? You love this so-called stupid face.” Nicholas quipped with a smirk.
“You’re insufferable. I don’t even know why I’m friends with a Neanderthal.” Cooper complained, trying to sound annoyed but failing as a grin tugged at his lips.
“Because you can’t live without me.”
“Oh trust me, I can.”
“That’s a shame.” Nicholas let out a dramatic, sullen sigh, pressing the back of his grease-free palm to his chest as though Cooper’s words had physically wounded him. But then his expression shifted, turning unexpectedly serious. “Because I would die without you, Cooper.”
Cooper’s eyes widened briefly, his words faltering as a familiar warmth spread through his chest. His stomach churned into knots, trapping butterflies that hadn’t been there a second ago. Nicholas smiled at him, wide and genuine, and Cooper couldn’t help but smile back.
“Bet you do numbers with that line.” Cooper mused, narrowing his eyes playfully.
Nicholas chuckled, shaking his head. “You know you’re my number one. The rest don’t even come.” He winked with a grin.
“Yeah, yeah.” Cooper threw a napkin at him, desperate to hide the heat rising to his face. “Clean your face.”
“I don’t have a mirror.” Nicholas gestured theatrically. “Help your poor friend out.”
With a resigned sigh, Cooper leaned forward and wiped the sauce away with his thumb. Just as he pulled back, Nicholas caught his hand and bit down playfully.
“Ow!” Cooper yelped, startled, before narrowing his eyes.
Nicholas laughed, his shoulders shaking.
“You’re such a child, Nicholas.” Cooper muttered, shaking his head. But the chuckle that escaped his lips betrayed him.
“Oh, poor baby.” Nicholas’s voice dropped into a mockingly sweet tone. “Did I hurt you? Want me to kiss it better?”Nicholas grinned wickedly, tightening his fingers around Cooper’s wrist.
Cooper’s breath hitched, but before he could respond, a shadow loomed over their table causing them to freeze.
“Hey, Cooper.”
Cooper turned, finding himself face-to-face—or as close as he could be while seated—with one of the seniors. It took him a moment to place the boy and figure out how he knew him, still a bit thrown off by Nicholas’s earlier proposition. Not to mention, Nicholas hadn’t let go of his hand.
The boy’s name was Donovan. They’d recently worked on a biology project together. A very cute blonde with striking blue eyes, Donovan had been so obviously crushing on him that he’d stutter whenever Cooper got too close or their fingers accidentally brushed while using the microscope.
Cooper had found it adorable, and had expected that Donovan would eventually work up the nerve to ask him out. But once the project ended, Donovan vanished without a word, and Nicholas had stolen so much of Cooper’s attention that he’d quickly forgotten about him.
That is, until now.
Cooper quickly slipped his hand out of Nicholas’s grasp, not wanting the cute senior to get the wrong idea and think he and Nicholas were dating. “Hi. Donovan, right?”
“Yeah, from biology class. We worked on that project together—“
“Yes!” Cooper interrupted with a chuckle, cutting Donovan off before he launched into a detailed recap of their project. He’d noticed that Donovan had a habit of overthinking, which often led to nervous, rambling sprees that were both endearing and amusing. But it was too time consuming. “I remember. How could I forget? Though I thought you did. You’ve been avoiding me like the plague.”
Donovan’s blue eyes widened in horror, darting back and forth between Cooper and Nicholas. That might have been a mistake. Nicholas was known for being intensely protective of Cooper, and Cooper had a sinking feeling that mentioning Donovan’s avoidance, intentional or not, wasn’t his smartest move.
Nicholas remained silent, though the heat of his glare was impossible to ignore, searing into Donovan with an intensity that was scaring him. The poor boy shifted nervously under the scrutiny, his flushed face only growing redder.
Cooper didn’t dare look at Nicholas for more than a fleeting second. He was afraid—afraid of the strange warmth running down his spine and, the subtle tremor in his chest at Nicholas’s protective stance. Worse, he feared he might enjoy it far more than Donovan’s obvious interest.
“No, no, no! I wasn’t ignoring you. I swear!” Donovan spluttered, his face flushing red.
Cooper hummed, thoroughly pleased by the effect he had on the senior. Despite being older, Donovan acted as if Cooper held all the power in their dynamic. It was flattering in a way, and Cooper couldn’t help but let a tiny smirk tug at the corner of his mouth.
“I made the mistake of assuming something that I thought was true, but here I am, wanting to ask you something.” Donovan smiled nervously, holding out a slip of paper. “I was wondering if we could exchange numbers? Maybe you’ll allow me to take you on a date…”
“Wow.” Nicholas straightened in his seat, his eyes narrowing with unmistakable sharpness.“Interrupting someone’s lunch after having the nerve to ghost them? Bold move.” His voice dripped with sarcasm. “Also, if this is your idea of charm, it needs work and oh, pro tip? Your timing sucks.”
“Nick.” Cooper interjected, his tone firm as he shot him a warning look.
Nicholas’s hardened gaze flicked to Cooper, then he huffed something under his breath, too low to make out.
Cooper turned back to Donovan with an apologetic smile. “Ignore him. He thinks he’s funny. Leave me your number, and I’ll text you later, okay?”
Donovan nodded quickly, his face red as he slid the slip of paper onto the table before making a hasty retreat. Cooper grabbed it just in time to stop Nicholas from snatching it, tucking the number into his pocket without acknowledging the glare drilling into him.
“What was that about?” Cooper asked once Donovan was out of earshot.
“It’s rude to interrupt someone while they’re eating.” Nicholas shrugged, shoving the tray toward Cooper. “Made me lose my appetite.”
Cooper frowned, watching him closely. “Nick…”
Nicholas crossed his arms over the table, jaw ticking by the second. His fingers tapped against the table in a steady, agitated rhythm betraying the nonchalance Nicholas was trying to be.
Cooper considered pressing him but decided otherwise. Instead, he grabbed a slice of pizza from his untouched tray, taking an exaggerated large bite before shoving it toward him.
“Eat. You’re less unbearable when you’re not starving.”
Nicholas glanced at the pizza, then at Cooper, he stared at him for a moment before the corner of his mouth tugged upward into a smile. He took a bite, his sour mood vanishing as they took turns taking bites of the pizza.
______________________
The faint sound of rain pattered softly against Cooper’s bedroom window, a constant pattern that had become the backdrop of the week as Christmas drew closer. The house was comfortably warm, the thermostat turned up to ward off the winter chill, but Cooper still had to cocoon himself under heavy blankets, thick fuzzy socks always on his feet.
That afternoon, however, he had to settle for less than his usual comforts. Nicholas was over, and they had reluctantly committed to studying together. The chill of the room didn’t bother him as much as it might have; Nicholas’s proximity radiated warmth that Cooper couldn’t help but gravitate toward.
Nicholas, noticing the way Cooper kept fidgeting and shivering against the cold, had smirked and suggested a break so they could cuddle.
Cooper didn’t hesitate. He slid into Nicholas’s arms, wrapping himself around his friend like a koala, his face pressed firmly against the solid warmth of Nicholas’s chest before he took back his offer. It was perfect, a soft haven of body heat and quiet comfort.
Nicholas chuckled softly, his breath brushing against Cooper’s forehead. Cooper let out a small, indignant whine, which only made Nicholas laugh harder, the low vibrations resonating through Cooper’s body in a way that left him oddly content. But nothing compared to the feeling of Nicholas pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead, the brief contact sending a flutter through Cooper’s chest as Nicholas’s strong arms pulled him closer, holding him with an intensity.
Almost like he never wanted to let him go. Cooper could live with that. His own arms tightened around Nicholas.
Suddenly, his eyelids grew heavy, each slow blink feeling like a battle to keep them open. He knew he should’ve gotten up—there was too much homework waiting for him to even think about napping. But Nicholas’s hand moved in slow, comforting circles against his back, lulling him with an ease that made resistance impossible.
Before he could fight it, the gentle motion of Nicholas’s touch pulled him under, and he drifted off, safe and warm in the arms of his best friend.
The peaceful moment shattered all too soon, the sound of his mother’s car pulling into the driveway cutting through the steady rain. The slam of the car door sent them both jerking upright, disoriented and flushed from their stolen nap.
Now, the room carried the faint scent of hot chocolate and chocolate chips from the treats his mother had brought them earlier.
With their stomachs warm and full, they had settled into studying. Nicholas lounged on Cooper’s bed, absently flipping through his textbook. His legs dangled over the side, socked feet swinging lazily as he watched Cooper, who was hunched over his notes at the bed.
Cooper could feel his intense stare, but he decided to ignore him. Usually, Nicholas had a habit to zone out and not realize he would be in the line of direction of someone. He felt his phone buzz beside his crossed legs, reaching out, a smile found its way to his lips. It was a text from Donovan.
They had been texting back and forth getting to know each other. Donovan was very chatty behind a screen, Cooper discovered, because during school the blondie could only muster a few words to him. He guessed getting tongue-tied wasn’t a problem when one is texting, certainly a confident boost as Donovan always texted him how beautiful he thought Cooper was.
Cooper couldn’t blame him, with a face like his, everyone was bound to be mesmerized.
“So, are you gonna tell me who’s been keeping you so entertained lately?” Nicholas asked, though his tone felt more accusatory than curious.
Cooper’s fingers froze mid-typing. “What? Oh, just someone.”
He quickly turned off his phone and tucked it under his pillow, hoping to brush the question off.
Nicholas didn’t like Donovan—that much Cooper was certain of. Anytime the blonde’s name came up, Nicholas’ face would twist in exasperation, followed by some vague warning about “having a bad feeling” and telling Cooper to stay away.
To avoid the drama, Cooper had resorted to sneaking around school just to talk to Donovan. It was thrilling in its own way, though not because of Donovan himself. No, the real fun came from watching Nicholas squirm—how he’d grow visibly irritated whenever Cooper wasn’t by his side, complaining about his sudden disappearances.
Once, Nicholas had even half-jokingly threatened to tie him to a leash to keep him close.
Cooper swore he could’ve gotten down on his knees at that instant if Nicholas asked him too, but it was more fun causing that reaction out of the boy. Since it would be the closest thing he could ever get of Nicholas being jealous.
Nicholas raised a brow and closed his textbook with an audible thump. “Someone?” He echoed, leaning forward slightly. His gaze sharpened, the wheels clearly turning in his head. Nicholas knew Cooper was a social butterfly, someone who seemed to know everyone in school, so there were endless possibilities of who Cooper could be talking to.
“What’s he like?” Nicholas asked, his lips pressing into a tight line.
He was going to lie, but a part of him yearned for that possessive side of Nicholas to surface.
Yet, when he tried to think of all the great things about Donovan, the only thing that came out was—“He’s nice.”
The words landed awkwardly, and Cooper winced. He avoided Nicholas’s expectant gaze, instead shuffling to lay on his side, his legs cramping from staying still too long.
“Nice?” Nicholas scoffed, his voice dripping with disdain. “Nice is boring.”
“Not everyone has to be exciting.” Cooper muttered, brushing a hand through his hair. Already, he regretted lying down; it gave Nicholas the upper hand to loom over him with that hard, scrutinizing gaze of his.
Nicholas’s dark eyes, narrowed as they were, still seemed impossibly large. “I guess not.” He clicked his tongue, almost in disapproval.
Cooper watched as different emotions flickered across Nicholas’s face, only to vanish behind a carefully neutral expression. “What time should I pick you up for the party tomorrow?” Nicholas asked, casually. Cooper had to give him credit—he was a master at deflecting. Too bad the question only looped them back to the same topic.
Angie Delcid, a sophomore cheerleader, was throwing a massive party and had invited practically the whole school. Her parents, both high-profile doctors, were rarely around, and their solution to her loneliness was a seemingly endless stream of cash.
Angie didn’t seem to mind. She was known for her wild famous parties.
She had personally invited Cooper, though they weren’t exactly friends. He’d once comforted her when he found her crying in the library after a messy breakup with her dumb jock boyfriend.
Apparently, she hadn’t forgotten the gesture.
Unfortunately, she also hadn’t forgotten to mention how cute she thought Nicholas was, even asking Cooper if they were dating.
Cooper had reluctantly told her the truth, though part of him wished he hadn’t. He didn’t want to spend watching her flirt with Nicholas right in front of him.
Now, Cooper hesitated, biting his lip as he avoided Nicholas’s eyes. “Actually… you don’t have to.” He fiddled with the loose string of his sweatshirt, and muttered the next words under his breath. “Donovan is taking me.”
The silence that followed felt deafening.
Cooper almost believed that Nicholas didn’t hear him but by Nicholas’s stiffening posture, lips lifting into a ghost of a snarl told him otherwise. He sat up straighter, the book he’d been holding slipped from his hand.
“Oh. Donovan , huh?” His voice was calm, but there was an edge to it that made Cooper nervous.
Cooper nodded, feeling the heat creep up his neck. “Yeah. He asked me a couple of days ago, and… I figured I’d give him a chance.”
Nicholas hummed, the sound low and drawn out.
Okay, that wasn’t that bad. He thought Nicholas was going to react differently.
“So, what happened to staying away from him?”
Never mind.
Cooper tensed, but before he could answer, Nicholas’s voice hardened. “Or is it that my words don’t matter anymore because you think that loser is cute? Wait—” His eyes narrowed, almost turning into slits. “Is that who you’ve been ditching me for?”
“You were being biased after one encounter. One !” Cooper argued back, crossing his arms. “You didn’t even give him a chance.”
“He ignored you.” Nicholas countered steadfastly. “That’s all I need to judge his character.”
“He apologized.”
“Oh, I know exactly where he can shove that apology.”
“Nicholas.”
“What!?” Nicholas huffed, throwing his hands up. “Just because you’re blinded by his stupid blonde hair—which is definitely bleached—his blue eyes, and his dumb, nasally voice doesn’t mean I can’t see through his bullshit. He only wants one thing from you.”
“And what exactly is that?” Cooper asked, raising a skeptical brow.
Nicholas froze, his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water.
“Well?” Cooper pressed, his tone teasing.
“You know!” Nicholas burst out, his cheeks tinged with a faint pink hue.
“No, I don’t know.” Cooper replied with a mock pout, leaning forward, with the help of his hand, just enough to make his teasing clear.
Nicholas groaned, throwing his head back like he was in actual pain. “You’re impossible.”
Cooper giggled. A grave mistake. The sound only spurred Nicholas into action. Before Cooper could react, his friend shoved their things aside and pounced on him. Mischievous fingers sought out his most ticklish spots, and Cooper’s eyes widened in pure horror.
“Stop!” He yelled, his voice breaking into a desperate laugh. “I’m sorry!”
“Oh, not so funny now, huh?” Nicholas taunted, his grin wicked as he mercilessly tickled Cooper’s sides.
Cooper let out squeals of tortured pained laughter, writhing beneath Nicholas and flailing his arms in a vain attempt to defend himself. But Nicholas was faster, snatching both of Cooper’s wrists and pinning them above his head with one hand.
Nicholas grinned triumphantly, resuming his ticklish assault.
Through his tears of laughter, all Cooper could see was the blur of Nicholas’s golden chain dangling in front of him and the radiant grin that lit up his face. It was the kind of smile that made the corners of Nicholas’s slanted, strikingly dark eyes crinkle, softening his usual stony expression.
If only Nicholas knew. Cooper wasn’t mesmerized by icy blue eyes—never had been. It was those deep, black eyes gazing down at him now that truly left him breathless.
And the damn tickling! Cooper internally wailed, his ribs and stomach aching from the relentless clenching of laughter.
“Please! Please, Nicholas!” He begged, his voice breaking into gasping pleas. “Nicholas, please!”
Nicholas fingers froze mid-motion, and the words slipped out before he could stop them.
“God, you fucking beg so pretty.”
The room plunged into silence, the muffled world outside offering no distraction. The steady patter of rain that had filled the afternoon was now gone, leaving behind a stillness that felt unnaturally loud.
Cooper swore he could hear the pounding of their heartbeats in the quiet, or maybe it was just his own pulse echoing in his ears.
He and Nicholas stared at each other, breaths ragged and mouths slightly parted. Cooper was aware of their compromising position—his wrists pinned above his head, Nicholas body hovering mere inches away.
If Cooper dared to arch his back, their hips would meet, but he remained stilled. So did Nicholas.
Neither of them moved. Neither of them spoke.
The playful energy that had filled the room moments ago had shifted, into something heavier, charged with an intensity that made them paralyzed. Nicholas’s dark eyes burned with something unspoken, a heat that sent a spark racing down Cooper’s spine, igniting a flickering flame low in his stomach.
Cooper’s tongue darted out to wet his lips, the tension was making him nervous. He couldn’t help but let out a shaky breath afterwards as he caught Nicholas' eyes flickered down, tracking the movement.
His heart skipped a beat.
Nicholas inhaled sharply, his gaze lingered on Cooper’s mouth for a moment longer before his expression shifted into something hesitant— questioning.
Cooper swore he stopped breathing as Nicholas leaned down, slow and unsure, but before anything could happen, the door swung open, revealing Payton, Cooper’s twin brother, grinning mischievously.
“What’s up, lovebirds?” He gasped in surprise at the sight of them. “Oh, am I interrupting?” Payton teased, leaning against the doorframe.
Cooper and Nicholas sprang apart, as though the space between them would erase any suspicion. Cooper turned on his side, crossing his legs to shield whatever needed to be hidden, and shot his twin brother a withering glare. He was going to pay for his bad timing!
“Go away, Payton.” He snatched the nearest pillow and hurled it at him.
Payton caught the pillow mid-air with the ease of someone far too used to dodging his brother’s antics. Smirking, he lobbed it right back.
Cooper winced, bracing for impact, but Nicholas’s hand shot out, catching the pillow effortlessly before it could smack him in the face. Seriously, that shouldn’t have been extremely hot, but his body and mind thought otherwise.
“Thanks.” Cooper muttered, glancing up at Nicholas with a sheepish smile.
Nicholas tossed the pillow to the side with a shrug, his expression unreadable as his eyes lingered on Cooper for just a moment too long.
“Whatever.” Payton grumbled, rolling his eyes. “Dad’s not here, so that makes me the man of the house. I’m just here to make sure Nicholas hasn’t devirginized you under our sacred household.” He said in faux sternness, his eyes darting between Nicholas and Cooper with raised suspicion.
Cooper’s eyes widened in horror. “Oh my God, Payton, get out.”
Nicholas smirked at Payton, then flipped Cooper onto his stomach, way too easily and quite offended him, and then swung a leg over him.“You caught me. Close the door for me, Payton. I’m about to make your brother a teen mom.”
“What?” Cooper choked out, his face going crimson and the air leaving his body as Nicholas' heavy body settled comfortably on top of him.
Payton cackled, and Cooper groaned, burying his face in his hands. He hated when his brothers and Nicholas teamed up against him.
His embarrassment turned into humiliation when he felt Nicholas thrust which made his pelvis brush against Cooper’s backside, causing him to squeak. “Get off of me!”
Payton’s laughter echoed in the hallway, but it was abruptly cut off by a new voice. “I really hope you were joking, Nicholas.” came Cooper’s mothers deadpan reply as she stepped into view.
Nicholas’s face turned scarlet. “Ma’am,” He stammered, scrambling to get off Cooper as if it would erase the fact he was dry humping her son. “I… uh… I didn’t mean…I was kidding, Mrs. Koch.”
Mrs. Koch lips twitched with suppressed amusement. “Dinner’s in thirty.” She said simply before walking away.
As the sound of her footsteps faded, Cooper and Payton burst into laughter. Nicholas groaned, covering his face with his hands. “I’m never showing my face here again.”
“You’ll survive.” Cooper said, still chuckling. He reached over and pinched Nicholas’s flushed cheek. “Aw, you’re even redder than usual. How cute.”
“ Obliviousssss .” Payton sighed out with a fond smile, before shutting the door behind him.
Nicholas batted his hand away but said nothing, his laughter fading into a contemplative silence. His eyes drifted to Cooper, watching as he settled back into his previous position and finally returning to his notes.
After a moment, Nicholas broke the quiet, restless to know the answer. “So… are you gonna date this guy?”
Cooper’s pencil paused mid-scribble. He shrugged and then tilted his head, hooking his chin over his shoulder to glance back at Nicholas. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
Nicholas didn’t say anything, but he had this sour look that told Cooper he wasn’t pleased with Cooper’s response.
Cooper smirked. “Don’t worry. You’ll still be my number one.”
Nicholas let out a soft snort. “Don’t use my own words against me.”
The teasing lilt in his tone faded as his gaze lingered on Cooper. “You can do better, you know.” Nicholas shifted closer, their shoulders brushing. His legs tangled with Cooper’s, then, to Cooper’s surprise, Nicholas leaned in and pressed a fleeting kiss to his shoulder. Close to where his chin rested.
As quickly as it happened, Nicholas pulled back and returned to the textbook he’d abandoned. Cooper didn’t say anything, but his smile widened as he stared down at his notebook.
Maybe, just maybe, Payton wasn’t entirely wrong.