Chapter Text
"All Great and Precious things are Lonely,"
-John Steinbeck, East of Eden
“It must have been very difficult.”
Yeonjun shrugged, glancing at the campus therapist before resuming his aimless tracing along the grooves of her well-worn desk.
“Yeah, well, nothing’s ever easy, is it?”
The therapist cleared her throat, shifting through his file.
Yeonjun glared at it, knowing full well what it contained.
Choi Yeonjun, 20, Sophomore.
Subgender: Alpha
Pack Status: Unregistered; Lone Wolf***
***For Lone Alpha liability waiver and permits, see attached
“Hm. And the break from your birth pack… It was self-initiated?”
Yeonjun sighed, twisting uncomfortably in his chair. The split had always been the hardest part to explain. Not because it was particularly complicated, but because most people just couldn’t comprehend breaking a pack bond for anything less than forming a new pack.
“Pretty much. My Pack…,” he sucked in a breath, his heart aching at the thought of them even all this time later. “I come from a big pack, there’s a lot of families, and- Well, let’s just say none of them were interested in moving halfway across the world just because I got into my dream school.”
His therapist frowned. “Even so, plenty of students go long-distance with their Pack. Even if it’s difficult, surely it’s still better than-”
“-Not for me.” Yeonjun curled his fist, refusing to look up as he explained, “I can’t- I couldn’t handle having a bond and then being separated. When I have a Pack… I need to be there for them. I need to be around them. Almost constantly.” He laughed deprecatingly. “I’m clingy like that, I guess.”
“I knew if I tried to do long distance I would just go running back. And I’ve worked too hard for this. Dancing at this school, performing at this school… It’s my dream. And I’d do anything for it.”
“Even endanger your fellow students?”
Yeonjun flinched. And this was why no reasonable Alpha would ever break away without having another Pack lined up. Because Lone Alphas were universally feared, and subsequently universally treated like shit.
“I-”
“I don’t mean to be harsh-” Yeonjun rolled his eyes. “-But statistically, Packless Alphas like yourself are at an increased risk of going feral. It’s been two years, and you still haven’t formed any pack bonds.” The therapist pulled a sheet of paper from her desk, handing it to Yeonjun.
“This is a list of all the Packless Betas and Omegas we have on campus. I understand not wanting to join another Alpha’s pack, being a secondary Alpha is not for everyone, but I highly encourage you to start forming your own before it’s too late.”
Yeonjun sighed, getting the message from the Therapist’s frequent glancing at the clock and shuffling of papers that his appointment was up. She had been “reassigned” to him after his previous campus therapist had left on maternity leave, and the difference between them was staggering. He and Jeonghan had actually been making significant progress, working through the grief of losing a Pack bond, intentional or not.
He had also seemed more than understanding of Yeonjun’s general disposition towards Packs, and the fact that he actually would love to be a secondary Alpha, if only one of the packs on campus were willing to take in a “dangerous” Lone Wolf.
Yeonjun didn’t want to be a leader. He wasn’t meant for it, the same way he knew he wasn’t meant to do anything besides dance. He felt it in his bones, his Alpha felt it, deep in his chest. There was something he was waiting for. Some one . There was only one person who had ever made him consider forming his own Pack, and, well…
He shoved the paper back on the Therapist’s desk, hitching his bag over his shoulder. “You can keep that,” he muttered. “There’s only one person I’m interested in starting a pack with.”
Something like interest flickered over the therapist’s face. Yeonjun huffed, turning away and pressing against the heavy office door as he made his exit.
“And he’s not on that list.”
At 10:37 am that same Tuesday, Choi Soobin snapped his pencil.
Yeonjun stared at the remnants of what had once been his pink, glittery, part-of-a-set pencil and concluded that his day would not be improving any time soon. This was what he got for forgetting one of the golden rules of college: never hand over a writing utensil if you had any emotional or financial investment in it. You were more than likely never going to see it again.
In his defense, the handing-over of his prized possession had happened somewhat without his conscious participation, in the sense that Soobin had snapped his own pencil, stared at it despondently, and somehow Yeonjun’s hand was there holding out a replacement before he could even think about it.
Such was the power of Choi Soobin, Omega, over Choi Yeonjun. Yeonjun wished it was the sort of thing that had come gradually, but the truth was that Yeonjun had been helpless over the doe-eyed man from the moment he laid eyes on him.
Yeonjun had walked in, saw the absolute vision of Omegan beauty sitting by the window- sunlight filtering through platinum blond hair, making Yeonjun question if he had been sucked into a Shoujo Manga- and immediately had visions of cherub-cheeked pups and picket fences.
He took a seat at the desk beside the blond, subtly breathing in through the nose to check for any claims. He couldn’t see a mating bite and there didn’t seem to be any hint of ‘territorial Alpha’ that Omegas in Packs tended to trail around, especially if they were young and unmated.
"I have a Pack,” a tense voice suddenly cut in, the owner’s back going stiff.
Yeonjun winced. One of the “perks” of being a Lone Wolf is that you carried the stench of it everywhere. Alphas scents were always a little sharp, even over-aggressive, but they mellowed out amongst the softer scents of their pack. With nothing to diffuse it, Yeonjun’s lemon scent had only sharpened over time, developing a chemical undernote that made him smell like spilled bleach, announcing his status against his will and immediately putting people on the defensive. Omegas, especially.
"Sorry,” Yeonjun apologized, rubbing harshly over his scent gland as if he could erase it off his body. “I didn’t mean to… I was just-”
The blond turned around to face him, eyes flickering towards his hand with a subtle frown before he suddenly softened, settling his posture.
"Y'know, sitting there sniffing the air is way weirder than just asking,” the man teased, a gentle smirk appearing and throwing Yeonjun off-kilter, heart picking up pace.
"I- huh. Good point. I just didn't want to bother you if you were taken. Which I should have guessed that you are, because you look like that, but-"
The omega almost looked flustered, glancing away towards the window before quickly darting back. "I'm not taken. I have a pack, but not a… I’m not mated." Yeonjun's eyes must have lit up at that, because the blond quickly went back to frowning. "And I'm not interested."
"Right. Got it. I'll, uh, move over there," Yeonjun grabbed his shoulder bag.
"You don't have to,” The blond rushed out, surprising him. The words must have even surprised the man who uttered them, because he paused, blinking. “Well… as long as you don’t mind staring at the back of my head the whole time."
Yeonjun settled back down in his seat, finally noticing the height difference. The Omega definitely had a good three inches on him. Which he was apparently into, as the fact only served to kick up a little flurry in his stomach. "I'm gonna be honest… I would probably be staring at you regardless. At least this way I have an excuse.”
The omega rolled his eyes, but his smile creeped back onto his face, making something in Yeonjun ache. The blond held out his hand. "Choi Soobin."
"Choi Yeonjun."
Something a little mischievous sparked on Soobin's face. "Well, Yeonjun… Enjoy the view, I guess. Try not to fail the class.”
And that had been that. Yeonjun knew his Alpha was pining, and he occasionally had to hold back a whine or growl from inside his chest whenever Soobin did something especially cute- like tuck his hands into his cardigan when the classroom was too cold. But it turned out that the most distracting thing about Soobin was not his looks, but the fact that he was an enigma.
He had said he was part of a Pack, and therefore had to have a Pack Alpha- but Yeonjun never smelled a trace of Alpha anywhere on him.
He got cold easily- Yeonjun had seen him with hand warmers stuffed in his pockets, and he was always bundled in multiple layers- but he still drank his coffee iced.
He was shy, introverted- but laughed loudly and freely at the texts that came into his phone.
He never spoke up in class, but was secretly opinionated and deeply knowledgeable about subgender studies, sometimes muttering the answer to the Professors’ question at a volume only Yeonjun could hear. And if he wasn’t muttering answers, it was a snappy little quip that had Yeonjun fighting not to spit out his morning coffee.
At the beginning, Yeonjun thought no one else had picked up on their professor's… traditionalist outlook. Which was ironic, considering the guy was teaching a Subgender Studies course. But then after a particularly rough lecture on why Omegas had a duty to protect themselves from Alphas by always covering up, keeping their scent profiles low, etc.- He looked over to see Soobin giving their professor a death glare that gave Yeonjun the chills.
By the end of lecture, Soobin was angrily stuffing his notebook in his bag- phone pressed to his ear. "You will never believe what that douchebag said today," he ranted. Yeonjun had desperately wanted to hear Soobin destroy the professor's argument piece by piece- but he had given the man his privacy.
And he was sure that Soobin could destroy their professor if he really wanted to. He was obviously educated and passionate about Omega issues, if the pins on his backpack and his ‘Not Your Property’ sweatshirts were anything to go by. Plus he was always reading books with titles like, “The Subgender Revolution” and “Overcoming Alpha Bias 101”.
It had made Yeonjun wary at first, not because he didn’t share Soobin’s views, but because Omega activists weren’t always the first people coming to the defense of Lone Alphas. Soobin never seemed to treat him any differently than the other Alphas in the class, however. If anything, he seemed the slightest bit more comfortable with him , gently teasing him about his caffeine consumption and always turning to check that Yeonjun could properly see the whiteboard.
Every little interaction made Yeonjun desperate for another, so he was ecstatic the day he caught Soobin before class, reading a book he actually recognized. His therapist Jeonghan had recommended he read, “Worth Beyond your Status” when he was adjusting to being packless, and it had made a huge impact on him.
“Oh hey, I love that book,” he said, trying to be casual with it and not all, “ hey I’m desperate to have shared interests with you” .
Soobin blinked, before squinting his eyes in suspicion. “You’ve read it?”
“No, I just really love the cover,” Yeonjun deadpanned, mildly offended at the blond’s disbelief.
Soobin had the decency to look a little shamefaced. “Ah, sorry- I’m just surprised.” He hesitated, eyes flicking to the spot above Yeonjun’s collarbone. “But I guess I shouldn’t be. One of my pack members grew up Lone, and he loves this book, too. Have you always…?”
“Ah.” Yeonjun scratched his neck, settling into a desk across from the blond. “No, not always. I… made the decision to separate from my pack before I went to college.”
Soobin leaned a little closer, eyes wide and attentive. Yeonjun was sure that Soobin was the type of person who had people spilling their life stories to him at grocery stores. He just had that face.
“That was brave of you.”
Yeonjun felt his chest swell, before the heavy weight of the last two years crashed back into him. “Idiotic, more like,” he scoffed.
Soobin shook his head emphatically, long fingers tapping just barely against his arm, forcing him to look up.
“It wasn’t. Separating from a Pack… it’s not easy. If you went through the work of going through with it, then it must have been for a good reason.”
Yeonjun shuddered out a breath, feeling himself being tugged closer with every slow blink of Soobin’s eyes. Across from him like this, Yeonjun could more accurately pick up Soobin’s scent, a subtle thing that smelled like fresh bread, sweetened by what must have been the scents of the rest of his pack. Nothing sour, though. Nothing earthy. Yeonjun felt himself lean back, afraid of tarnishing it.
“Well, uh, thank you. You mentioned your pack member…. Were you Lone, too, at some point? You sound… familiar with it.” You don’t act like I’m something to fear.
Soobin huffed, laughing faintly. “No. Not really,” he said. “I only left my Birth Pack when I- When I joined my current one.”
Yeonjun tilted his head, still more than a little confused by Soobin’s pack scent, which, while strong, was still missing a crucial component.
“Your Pack Alpha… Does he live far away?”
Soobin suddenly closed back up, long legs tucking under his own desk as he turned back towards the front. “Something like that,” he murmured.
Before Yeonjun could question further, or apologize for his apparent misstep, the bell had rung, and the conversation was over.
Despite the sudden cold shoulder, that conversation still managed to bring the two of them closer. Soobin continued to inch himself open to Yeonjun, dragging the Alpha further into his orbit. During class, he would sit in stony silence, jaw tensing whenever their professor’s rhetoric got especially bigoted. But then he would glance back at Yeonjun and roll his eyes- and Yeonjun would do the same in an act of solidarity.
Yeonjun continued to fall, staring at the back of Soobin’s beautiful, platinum blond head until he swore he had the individual strands memorized. Developing an unhealthy attachment to particular sweaters, just for the way they sat against pale skin. Handing over his pens, pencils, and notebook paper without a second thought (Soobin was just a touch disorganized.)
And he didn’t mind one bit, until 10:37 am on that cursed Tuesday, when Soobin snapped his favorite pencil right in two.
Their professor was on another one of his moralizing rampages, this time about Pack Alphas. Yeonjun almost suspected some sort of conspiracy between this asshole and his school therapist.
"As we all know, Alphas are born with the unique ability to form packs. They are the only subgender who produce the chemicals needed to trigger what we call a 'submissive bond', which establishes proper pack hierarchy. Now, some people feel that term is outdated, but the fact remains that a pack falls apart without a dominant Alpha at the helm.”
Yeonjun sighed, taking solace in the wound-up slope of Soobin’s shoulders, the man twirling his borrowed pencil between his fingers in clear irritation. Yeonjun figured the Omega was reacting to the Professor’s use of submissive and dominant language, when modern science had made it clear that the bonding process was far more complicated than an Alpha putting his pack members in their place. Hell, his Pack Alpha growing up was the farthest thing from dominant, and his Pack was perfect. Had been perfect. Back before Yeonjun gave it up.
His birth pack had been huge, encompassing four separate packs that had merged to help each other with child raising. And while some kids sweltered under the pressures of a large family pack, tensing at the constant touches and nauseating over the scents that covered their clothes, permeated their den- Yeonjun had loved every second of it. So much so that he never once felt the need to pull away; to start forming bonds with people outside of his pack.
Sure, he was extroverted and friendly with his peers- but whenever talk of packs came up he just felt pressured. Too many people looked at him like he had all the answers, like he could take charge and lead them just because he was good at everything else, so why not this? But what they didn’t see was how damn hard Yeonjun worked to be good at everything. The hours he spent dancing, hoping for that scholarship, desperate to get into this school- The insomnia-filled nights, trying to type up that last essay while his fingers jittered from too much caffeine. He already put everything he had into staying at the top of his class and keeping up with dance training. If he added leading a pack on top of that, he knew things would crumble.
So, in the end, he avoided the whole thing- even taking the hit of being labeled a “flighty Alpha”, as long as it meant people weren’t begging him to start a pack or join one of theirs.
Then again, maybe if someone told him that after all of his sacrificing- after scraping his knees raw on studio floors and passing out in the nurse's office just to get a few hours of sleep- after all that , he would walk onto his dream campus a packless, Lone Wolf… Maybe he would have reconsidered his priorities.
Because their professor had a point about Pack Alphas. They did play a critical role in creating packs. And the value of packs (healthy, safe ones, like the one he grew up in) was something he believed in wholeheartedly.
He may not have made any new bonds in high school, but he always had a warm den to come home to. He could curl up around his youngest cousin, breathing in that soft, puppy scent while his mom ran gentle hands through his hair and his dad hummed some old 80’s tune from the kitchen. He had a place, and an identity- and now he laid awake at night on his creaking dorm bed; aching.
"We can clearly trace the rise in teen anxiety and depression to the fact that more kids are being raised with absent Pack Alphas. A healthy hierarchy is essential for positive growth, and without it there is a clear struggle to-"
* Snap *
Soobin turned to Yeonjun with an embarrassed grimace, holding out the snapped pencil. Yeonjun tried to offer a placating smile back, reaching into his bag to pull out another one. This was just your standard yellow pencil- he wasn't willing to risk another of his fancy ones.
Their fingers brushed, and Yeonjun picked up the distress in Soobin's scent. In all honesty, he wasn’t sure what Soobin was so upset about. The professor wasn’t even talking about omegas this time. And unlike him, Soobin had a pack. Even if his Pack Alpha was distant, or weirdly touch-averse, he still had a pack. He still had everything Yeonjun wanted.
“Recently, you might have seen talks about an act to change Pack Law in the United States. Does anyone know what I’m referring to?”
Soobin’s hand shot up violently, shocking Yeonjun and the rest of the class. The professor looked a little off-balanced, too, glancing at his class roster to try and remember the blond’s name. “Yes, Mr. Choi?”
“The Anti-Discriminatory Pack Act. It allows for Pack members to define themselves as and become a legally registered pack without a Pack Alpha.”
“Right. And given what we discussed earlier, does anyone have any thoughts as to why this could be a concern?”
“I have one,” Soobin said, not bothering to raise his hand again. “A thought, that is. Which might surprise you, considering I’m an Omega.”
Even the sleepiest students were sitting up a little straighter in their seats now, awestruck at the sudden boldness of their usually silent classmate.
Soobin ignored their teacher’s sputtering, continuing on. “I think the upholding of traditional pack structures as something sacred is ridiculous, given that we have no evidence that children raised in these ‘unique’ packs are any worse off. The statistics you spouted before are not causational. Most experts agree that teens are too busy panicking about our planet dying and the crashing economy to care about the subgender of their pack leader. And there are many people who, for various reasons, choose not to be part of a pack and are happy and well-adjusted. Not to mention how unprofessional it is to hold up these false statistics when there are students in this very class who are in non-traditional pack situations, and they’re perfectly fine.”
All eyes in the room turned towards Yeonjun. Suddenly, all of the satisfaction (and minor arousal) that he had felt while watching Soobin’s verbal sparring against their professor evaporated. He felt sick.
“Non-traditional pack situation” was the kind, arguably liberally-bent way to refer to Lone Wolves or people in similar situations. It was the sort of language people like Jeonghan used. Or, apparently, activist-minded people like Soobin. And while he understood why the Omega might consider him an example of someone in a “non-traditional situation” who was “perfectly fine”; the statement was so far from the truth it was almost laughable. He wasn’t fine. He cried himself to sleep so often that he was almost always walking around with a dehydration headache.
“Fine” had left his vocabulary the second his Pack Alpha had given him a firm hug and said “I release you from this pack.”. It was meant to be a statement of freedom, it was even what Yeonjun himself had wanted and asked for, but it had rung through his chest like a death sentence.
And now everyone was staring at him, once again reminded that a Lone Alpha was wandering around their campus. Soobin obviously saw him as some well-adjusted miracle child who maybe didn’t even need a pack, but to everyone else (himself included) he was a ticking time bomb.
Yeonjun kept his head down in the ensuing silence, waiting for their professor to collect himself enough to respond.
“Right, well. You can see me after class,” he said stiffly.
Soobin rolled his eyes but eventually nodded. And then, as if finally noticing the mood shift in the room- he looked over at Yeonjun. The Alpha must have still looked stricken, because Soobin let out an involuntary sound of concern.
The professor finished up the lecture awkwardly, no one else offering up commentary in fear of incurring Soobin’s wrath. He allowed the students to work on their assignments for the last 30 minutes of class, which Yeonjun figured was a perfectly good time to take a nap. The professor must have felt sorry for him, as he didn’t say anything.
He could still feel the weight of Soobin’s doe eyes bearing into him, however, so sleep wasn’t coming easily. A soft touch on his arm, then:
“Hey. Are you okay?”
Yeonjun sighed, shoving his face deeper into his arms. “Not really.”
“Oh. If anything I said upset you-”
Yeonjun lifted his head. “Look- being a Lone Wolf isn’t exactly a walk in the park. So while I might seem ‘perfectly fine’ to you, I’d prefer for my status to not become some kind of class debate.”
Soobin’s eyes widened. “Oh. Oh no, You thought I was talking about… Okay, look, I know you have no reason to believe me, but I promise that I wasn’t talking about you. Not directly, at least. I was-”
Yeonjun scoffed. “Soobin. Nobody else here is packless. I mean, other than your Pack Alpha being some kind of scentless, touch-averse freak- all of your pack situations are normal. I’m the only one you could have meant.” And yeah, maybe that was a little sharp- but Yeonjun had just been humiliated in front of the whole class. He had earned that quip.
Soobin stiffened just like Yeonjun had known he would, eyes glaring. “My pack situation is none of your business-”
“Well neither is mine!” Yeonjun blew up. And suddenly the stares were back.
“Yeonjun…” and there may have been some remorse in Soobin’s eyes, but Yeonjun wasn’t willing to stick around and check. He turned to the professor. “I have a headache.” Not waiting for a response to that either, he grabbed his bag and left.
To: Taehyun, sent 9:02
hey pup. my class got out early, are u already @ the library?
From: Taehyun, sent 9:04
I'm not your pup.
From: Taehyun, sent 9:05
bring coffee.
To: Taehyun, sent 9:07
already on it <3 <3 <3
The university’s coffee shop was Yeonjun’s safe haven. Not only because he was made up almost entirely of iced americanos at this point, but because it was open 24/7. So on the nights where the loneliness hurt so bad he couldn’t breathe, there was always somewhere to turn to in order to verify that, no, Yeonjun was not the only person left in the universe.
And considering that the person behind the counter was often Choi Beomgyu, who had the energy of three people wrapped in one, it was truly a gift for Yeonjun’s desperate extroversion.
“Whoa, who died?”
Then again, Beomgyu was a little shit. Yeonjun glared.
“Don’t ask people that. What if someone actually died?”
Beomgyu’s eyes went round as saucers, immediately concerned. “Did someone-”
“No, Beomgyu. Just a shit day in class, that’s all.”
The Beta immediately relaxed. “Aish, don’t scare me like that! Oh, but you know what’ll cheer you up?”
“If it’s some new creation of yours-”
“I really think I have something this time! Elderberry Lavender,” he announced with a flourish, thrusting a deep purplish concoction in front of Yeonjun's face. The smell alone made the alpha take a hesitant step back. “I thought of it because-”
“-They’re both purple?”
Beomgyu tapped the side of his nose and wiggled his eyebrows.
“Okay, well, I told Taehyun I’d bring him coffee before our tutoring session, so-”
At the mention of the young Omega’s name, Beomgyu’s face got even brighter. “Oh perfect, you can bring him my new Latte. He said it sounded good when I texted him about it this morning!”
Yeonjun scoffed.
“I think he only said that because he’s…”
“...He’s?”
“.... dumb,” Yeonjun finished lamely, having remembered at the last minute that crushes were supposed to be secret. And that Taehyun would quite literally kill him, and the Omega’s ever-expanding muscles would allow him to do so quietly and with efficiency.
Beomgyu glared. “He’s not dumb! He’s my- He's our smartest pack member.”
Yeonjun tried not to grimace as reminders of the day’s earlier events came rushing back.
Because, of course, the lovely and open-hearted Beomgyu and his equally endearing and (likely) future mate shared a pack- A pack that, based on their descriptions, Yeonjun would love to be a part of. The way they talked about it always sounded so warm and carefree- like they were truly a family rather than a group of unstable teens playing house.
They never even called their Pack Leader “Alpha”: It was always, “Leader told me-,” or, “You won’t believe which anime the big idiot made us watch last night”. Once, when Beomgyu was particularly sleepy during his graveyard shift, Yeonjun had heard him mumble over the phone, “Yes, mom - I’ll text you when I’m home.” When Yeonjun had questioned why the hell Beomgyu’s mother was awake at 2 am, Beomgyu had blinked back, “Oh- that was just my pack Leader.”
It reminded him of how easy everything always was with his birth pack. No forced subordination or constant “Yes, Alpha,” everytime his Uncle asked something of him. His Pack Alpha had always led them calmly but firmly, keeping them safe and never asking for much in return. Even though it made the lonely wolf in his chest howl at the injustice, Yeonjun still tried to focus on how happy he was that these two people had found such a good Alpha.
Beomgyu, ever perceptive to the slightest change in emotion, immediately noticed Yeonjun’s plummeting mood and hurried to make his americano.
“No weird flavors, I promise!” He mimicked a pinky promise while he prepped Yeonjun’s espresso shot and Taehyun’s latte. While he still made Yeonjun take the purple monstrosity in a drink carrier, he was smart enough to also make the Omega’s usual drink, “just in case.”
Yeonjun eventually made it to the library, slamming the drink carrier down with a finality that was a little unnecessary. So he tended towards dramatics on his bad days; sue him.
Taehyun barely acknowledged his arrival, eyes glued to his assignment as he muttered, “What took you so long?”
“Beomgyu-.”
“Say no more.”
“He wanted you to try his new latte.”
Taehyun stopped writing, giving the drink a calculating glance.
“The lavender elderberry, I presume?”
Yeonjun held it out to him, laughing at the trepidation on Taehyun’s face.
“I seriously don’t know how you keep drinking these. Just, like, dump them into a potted plant or something.”
“I can’t lie to him,” Taehyun sighed, wrapping his hands around the clear cup as if it held something precious and not a questionable mixture of purple-tinted espresso.
“He gets so excited and he always asks me questions and I don’t want to disappoint him, so-”
“Ew, fine- Just drink it, then.” Yeonjun was not in the mood for lovesick rambling. Blond flashed in front of his eyes. Nope, Love was out today. Love sucked . Love was-
“Huh. This one’s actually pretty good.”
Yeonjun peered at the iced drink suspiciously.
“There’s no way.”
“It’s kinda… herbal? It’s not too sweet- your dumb Alpha tastebuds will probably love it.”
“Watch it, Omega.” Yeonjun responded easily. Another thing about Beomgyu and Taehyun: as a result of being in a pack with who Yeonjun assumed was, like, the chillest Alpha on earth, they were both unphased and unimpressed by Alpha status to the point of blasphemy. Yeonjun was always a little on edge when he was with either of them, just waiting for a pig-headed Alpha to overhear one of their more ‘colorful’ conversations and start a fight.
Luckily, he only knew them from the coffee shop and from tutoring in the library, both of which were places that were pretty hard to start fights in. He didn’t want to think about what they’d be like at a bar, though. Their Pack Leader must be one hell of an Alpha to scare off all the asshole traditionalists that would surely try and start shit.
Speaking of which, Taehyun was urging him to take a sip from something he had already claimed as his own, and Yeonjun suddenly had a vision of himself getting pummeled to death by Taehyun’s incredibly cool but surely deadly Pack Alpha. Food and drink sharing was between pack members only; no exceptions.
“Dude, your Alpha would kill me,” Yeonjun looked around nervously.
“What Alpha?” Taehyun asked, frowning.
Yeonjun floundered. "Uh, your Pack Alpha? The big, tall nerd you're always going on about?"
"Oh." Taehyun's face did something complicated, stuck between a grimace and a smirk. "Don't worry, he won't care."
“But... you already drank from it!” This time Taehyun couldn't hold back his laugh.
“Oh my God, seriously? Are we in the 1800’s? Just don't use the straw, then. You can drink from the cup.”
The librarian was starting to send them glances, and Yeonjun was done with public humiliation for the day, so he quickly sat down.
“It’s the principle ,” he hissed. “You can’t just go around sharing your drinks with random Alphas.” Especially not Lone ones.
“You're not a random Alpha,” Taehyun countered. “You're the guy who’s tutoring me in English. Or you were , before you lost your mind over a cup of coffee.”
Yeonjun couldn’t help but laugh at that.
He was always so careful with Taehyun, who was not only younger and unmated, but an Omega to boot. He would never have agreed to tutor him, actually, as in his experience it only led to bloody scrapes with possessive Alphas who assumed the “feral, lone wolf” was trying to steal away their pack member. But Taehyun hadn’t listed his subgender on his tutor request form, and you couldn’t just turn down those huge brown eyes when they started blinking at you. (Kinda like another pair of doe eyes he knew, but moving on .)
He always made sure to never sit too close, and to keep his nose to himself (that lesson courtesy of Soobin). It was almost laughable that all of his attempts to be as respectful as possible had seemingly gone completely unappreciated by Taehyun.
"Your Pack Alpha seriously isn’t bothered by stuff like that?”
“He’s actually grossly unhygienic. One time, our packmate Kai licked all over the knife he was using to cut his birthday cake, and Leader just took it back and kept using it like nothing happened. I was so disgusted-”
“No, I mean- that is gross though- He doesn’t freak out when you smell like other Alphas or anything?”
Taehyun raised an eyebrow. "I mean, if you scented me or something it would be different. But no, he doesn't freak out every time he smells that I've been around an Alpha. That would be ridiculous. And probably exhausting."
"Wow. You seriously have the coolest pack.” That thing in Yeonjun’s chest started aching again.
Taehyun's face lit up with a soft smile; pleased. "Yeah, I really do."
They finally got into tutoring, working steadily through Taehyun’s English essay until Yeonjun felt himself starting to lose fluency in both Korean and English- the coffee not doing enough to keep his thorough exhaustion at bay.
Packing up his textbooks, Taehyun hesitated as he moved to put on his backpack.
“Hey, I’ve actually been thinking- Well, Beomgyu and I talked about it and…. we were wondering if you wanted to meet him? Our pack leader? And Huening Kai, of course.”
“Not just so he can murder me, right? Because I’m too pretty to die,” Yeonjun joked, carefully pressing down the little bit of hope he felt.
“No. I actually think he’d… really like you.” Yeonjun must have looked overly pleased about that, because Taeyhun quickly rolled his eyes. “He has terrible taste.”
“In pack members, clearly,” Yeonjun quipped back.
“Yep, you’ll fit right in.”
As they walked out of the library, squinting in the afternoon sunlight, Taehyun looked around before motioning for Yeonjun to sit with him on a nearby bench. “Before you decide if you want to meet the pack, you should know-”
And Yeonjun was glad he had worked so hard to keep all of that hope squandered, because he was sure Taehyun was about to give him the speech plenty of people have given him over the last two years.
“We want you to hang out- just don’t think we’re inviting you into the pack.”
“Don’t flirt with any of our omegas, okay? Just try and contain yourself.”
“You’re a fun guy- but our pack already feels complete, y’know?”
“How much do you know about… non-traditional pack structures?”
Yeonjun’s brain stuttered to a halt.
“Um, well, I guess a decent amount, considering I’m packless.”
Taehyun tilted his head.
Yeonjun licked his lips; elaborating. “Well, non-traditional is, like, the nice way to refer to Lone Wolves, right? Because maybe some of them want to be packless, although I can’t imagine why .”
Taehyun’s eyes widened and then narrowed in quick succession. “You can’t? But then… Why did you separate from your pack?”
“Believe me, it wasn’t my first choice. I didn’t really expect to get into this school, but then when I did… I couldn’t ask my pack to move, and I’m not the type who can go long distance. It would be torture, feeling the bond but not being able to be with them. I know people do it, but I- The way my Alpha is, I just couldn’t. So this was… better than the alternative. Honestly, I didn’t think it would be so long term. I guess my ego got the better of me.”
Taehyun hummed, staring across the campus lawn. “I guess I shouldn’t have assumed. Beomgyu and I- We just figured you were like us. Born packless or, uh, born to a bad pack.” The younger Omega rubbed across his shoulder; an absent-minded habit of his.
“Well anyways, non-traditional includes packless people, but usually it’s used to reference packs that… don’t have an Alpha Leader.”
“Oh. So like… no Leader at all?”
Taehyun quirked an eyebrow at him. “Sometimes. But usually, it’s an Omega or a Beta taking the role of Pack Alpha.”
“The anti-discriminatory Pack Law,” Yeonjun blurted, Soobin’s speech from that morning coming back to him. “That’s, uh, to help Packs like that? So they can get registered?”
Taehyun sighed, smiling fondly. “You got one of Soobin’s flyers, huh?”
“No, I just- Wait, what? Did you say Soobin?”
Taehyun blinked. “Yeah. Choi Soobin. You know him?”
“Six feet tall, blond hair, dimples that make you wanna cry? Quiet until you get him on a tangent, too nice for his own good, wears the world’s softest sweaters? Smells like fresh pastries? That Choi Soobin?”
Taehyun’s nose wrinkled. “Oh, ew. I thought you’d get along, I didn’t think one of you would already be in love .”
“He’s in my Subgender Studies class,” Yeonjun said faintly.
“Huh. I’m surprised he never mentioned…” Taehyun’s eyes flicked over him; assessing. Yeonjun would have been more hurt that he had never come up in conversation, except he was too busy connecting Taehyun, Beomgyu, and Soobin in his head, hurtling towards an impossible, and yet best-possible-case scenario.
“Well,” Taehyun breathed out, looking slightly less nervous. “I guess that makes this easier, assuming your apparent obsession with him hasn’t freaked him out yet.”
Yeonjun winced, causing Taehyun to roll his eyes in response. “Of course it did,” the Omega muttered. “Look, he can be a little emotionally constipated, but I bet if you-”
“It’s not that!” Yeonjun yelped, ears feeling hot. “It’s just that we kinda fought this morning. The professor was ranting about non-traditional packs, Soobin got defensive, and I thought-”
“-Thought he was barging in on something he knew nothing about?” Taehyun finished, alarmingly astute for someone so young. “Yeah, I can see how that could have gotten… messy.”
“But he does know, doesn’t he?” Yeonjun asked, dots connecting in his mind. The reason Soobin never smelled like an Alpha but insisted that he had a pack. The way Taehyun and Beomgyu never referred to their Leader as an Alpha. The slight possessive tone when Soobin mentioned his pack members.
“Because he’s your Pack Leader.”
Taehyun took in a surprised, shuddery breath; nodding. “I know it’s a lot to take in, but even if you don’t accept it… You really can’t tell anyone.”
“Hey,” Yeonjun held his hand out, wincing as a wave of stressed Omega pheromones rolled over him. “Don’t worry. I guess… Wait, this makes you guys technically packless, right?”
Taehyun’s shoulders tensed. “According to the government, yeah. But we’re not- We are bonded. It’s just… different.”
Yeonjun nodded. Traitorously, that hope from before started to bubble up to the surface again. Because if there wasn’t a Pack Alpha in the picture, then the only thing standing between Yeonjun and becoming a part of Soobin’s pack was Soobin himself.
And with Soobin as the Leader, well, Yeonjun couldn’t imagine a more perfect pack. So perfect, in fact, that Yeonjun was sure the last thing Soobin wanted was some chemically-soured Alpha barging in and ruining it. The hope fizzled.
He sighed. “Guess you were wrong about me and your Leader getting along.”
“Was I?” Taehyun tilted his head, smirking. “Because I remember someone waxing poetic a few minutes ago.”
Yeonjun shifted guiltily. “Yeah, well, I’m pretty sure it’s one-sided. Not to mention I yelled at him earlier.”
“Well, you Alphas might not have heard about it yet, but there is this thing called an apology. Works wonders.”
Yeonjun snorted, giving Taehyun a gentle shove. “Very funny.”
“Okay, but I’m not really joking. We’re having Pack Dinner tonight; you should come. Beomgyu and I were planning on inviting you anyway.”
Yeonjun shook his head, even though his Alpha was prancing with delight over being invited to the Pack’s den. “I don’t think Soobin would want me there.”
Taehyun pursed his lips, hesitating. “Leader can be a little… complicated. But like you said, most of the time he’s too nice for his own good. Whatever misunderstanding there was, I’m sure you guys can clear it up.”
“Are you gonna tell him you’re bringing me?”
“I told him that I was gonna invite my, uh, cool Alpha tutor earlier. I won’t tell him your name if you don’t want me to.”
“Probably best to warn him in advance,” he sighed, feeling himself give in against the whining pleads of his Alpha. Yeonjun grinned then, nudging Taehyun with his elbow. “I’m cool, huh?”
“I used to think so,” Taehyun shrugged. “But then you got all gushy about my Leader and now it's all ruined.”
Oh, right. Yeonjun had kinda… blurted out his feelings back there.
“...How much money will it take for you to keep your mouth shut about that?”
“Let’s just say you’ll be tutoring me for free from now on.”
“Deal.”
“Meet you here at 6:30? Beomgyu and I will walk you to the den.”
“...I’ll bring my groveling clothes.”