Chapter Text
Senku knew he couldn’t fall in love. Not that it was prohibited to him, or that he thought he was better than others. He just knew his brain wasn’t wired like that. He had known this since before the petrification. When he would listen to Taiju tell him about how his heart skipped a beat every time he looked at Yuzuriha, or how he could get lost in her eyes for hours, and Senku would think that was nice, but impossible to him. He had tried, had looked at all types of people trying to find the butterflies in his stomach. But the acidic environment is just not suitable for such a delicate living organism. So he researched, experimented, looked inside and outside himself, and then he found a label for it, and decided that was it.
Still, now in the observatory Gen had prepared for him as a surprise for his birthday, when he looked at him, he thought that if all that nonsense had been feasible to him this would have been the moment. Gen was objectively pretty, and what feeling could be more romantic than being so seen. So heard. Not only had Gen listened to him when he was talking but he had understood it enough to join two and two, find out about his birthday and prepare a fucking observatory . Just for him. So yeah, even though he wasn’t exactly getting all mushy and warm inside, he could appreciate the feeling of… Something nice.
And then Gen spoke.
— You know, — Gen was looking at the stars, a clearly flattering light adorning his face— since the beginning… since before I met you, i liked you. Aside from any benefits or tricks. — Was this… a confession? He didn’t want to have to turn down the guy, he was starting to enjoy his company— And I’m sure everyone in the town thinks the same. Although you probably think it's gross.
Gen’s smile didn’t falter, not even for a second. As if he was just… fine with that. With Senku not feeling the same. Or maybe he was overthinking this and it had nothing to do with romance. Then Gen looked at him, the movement making the light shine on his eyes. And he looked happy, honestly happy. Senku could bet that was the first time he could call anything Gen did as honest. He smiled back.
— Yeah, it’s gross.
— I knew it
He looked back at the stars, falling into comfortable silence. He used the telescope to search for the constellations he knew, seeing how they had moved in the sky, making a mental map of the different changes. His fingers itched to get a paper and write down all the differences, he would probably try to calculate when the stars that were missing had died. Millennia ago probably. But he didn’t know the exact moment they had disappeared from the sky, so everything would be speculation.
Lost in his mind, he thought everyone else had left until he heard a voice.
— Dear Senku, what are you looking at, exactly?
Surprised, he looked away from the telescope. It was only Gen and him now. He could give him a short answer, he could let silence fill the space between them, let it get bigger and bigger until it would push Gen away, to his own room. But Senku had seen something interesting in him, comfortable acceptance, real understanding. And what type of scientist would Senku be if he didn’t explore something interesting.
— I could explain to you if you wanted, though I’m sure it’ll just bore you.— He looked at Gen only from the side. Turning his whole body would be too much pressure. He wanted Gen to stay only if he wanted to.
— You could evernay bore me, Dear. — Senku wasn’t sure if Gen’s smile was genuine this time, but Gen only lied to get what he wanted, so he wanted to stay.
— I was looking at the differences in the sky from before the petrifications.
He could feel the complicated words about stars wanting to get out of him. Wanting to start a rant about numbers and lightwaves, but he didn’t want to scare Gen away, so he paused to let him talk too.
— I didn’t know the sky could change. I mean, throughout the year? Yes, but that's not what you mean, right?
Right. That was a question. He was asking him directly to talk.
— Yeah, some stars have died since then. Well, some died long before but we couldn’t have noticed. Now we can.
He stopped. He didn’t want to start explaining more deeply unless Gen wanted him to. Now that he noticed it, Gen was sitting besides him, their knees touching slightly. There were no fireworks, no tingly sensation or heat from where their bodies were making contact. But Senku liked to know they were touching. It meant closeness. He didn’t want to move away.
— How come we couldn’t know before, but you can now? I’m not doubting your skills dear, but science was… A lot back then. And this telescope has been made by, well, by us.
Gen chuckled lightly at the thought of comparing them with the scientists of their days. Senku concentrated on the laugh, trying to hear the chorus of angels everyone heard in the laughs of a loved one. No such thing happened. The experiment was proving to him nothing had changed, but he felt fine with it. He didn’t want to change. He felt happy to see Gen laugh, and maybe that was enough.
— All we get from the stars is their light, but since they are so far away we are actually getting the light from the past. Similar to how sound works, yes? — He waited for Gen's approving nod, he was understanding for now— so look at this constellation here— He got up to let Gen look through the telescope, and took a piece of chalk to draw on the floor. He would clean it up later— This is how it looked last time I saw it more than 3700 years ago. Do you see how this one is missing?
He waited for Gen to look at his drawing and then through the telescope a few times until he exclaimed
— Oh! I see it. Well, the absence of it, yes.
Senku felt proud to see Gen was following him so far.
— The one missing was called Delta Circini, it was about 3700 lightyears from us. So, that star was already dead when the petrification happened, we just hadn’t noticed yet. I can’t pinpoint exactly when it died cause it could have been anytime since then to now. But any star closer than that one that we see today was 10 million percent alive when I was looking at it from my home.
Gen nodded as if interested, or maybe he was really interested. Who could know with him?
— So all the stars further away, we don’t know if they were dead then?— Senku almost got surprised by the question.— I used to do astrology readings, and you’re telling me they could have been dead then and I didnt even know
— Which ones did you like? After all this time, maybe I could tell you. This is the only way someone could know if a star they’ve seen with their own eyes was alive or not.
Gen took his eyes off the telescope to look up, thinking. Senku took this moment to keep thinking about his feelings. Maybe if he looked deep enough he could prove himself wrong and find any sign of romance inside him. He looked intensely at Gen, he was pretty, but in the same way a painting was pretty. The same way the constellations were pretty.
— What about the Aries constellation? It’s the one from my horoscope.
Of course. Senku moved closer to Gen and grabbed the telescope to look for it. When he found the whole constellation intact he smiled.
— It’s your lucky day, mentalist. From what I remember the farthest star from the constellation, 41 Arietis, was only around 160 light years away so if it’s all intact now, they were all alive when you were looking at them — He stopped looking through to let Gen see for himself, but he didn't move his hand. He noticed his mistake when Gen grabbed the telescope to see and their fingers touched.
It wasn’t uncomfortable. He could see Gen’s light blush from where he was sitting next to him, so he hadn’t been wrong about the other’s feelings for him. He wasn’t going to explode or anything like that, but he was happy. Gen wasn’t imposing his feelings on him, the earth was still spinning, and Senku was fine with this.
— Glad to know, I guess.— Gen chuckled again— It’s not like I believed in all those things back then, I guess I’m the type of person to believe in whatever is necessary to believe in the moment. But still, I don’t know why, I’m happy to know Aries was real back then.
— It would have been real either way
— I know, I know. I don't know how to explain what I mean, okay? I guess it’s just weird to think about something that was alive then and now.
Senku swallowed the comment that stars weren't alive, per se, It wasn’t relevant.
— I think I understand what you mean, mentalist— And he did, somehow he knew exactly what Gen was feeling.
— Of course you do, Dear.
Gen was looking directly at him. The word Dear weighing heavy on the air between them. It wasn’t the first time Gen used that word, but the look in his eyes showed this time he meant it. If on purpose or not, that was a mystery. Senku should have been uncomfortable by it, if past iterations of this situation were to be taken as an example. But there was a healthy distance between their bodies, Gen had taken his hand off of his at some point Senku hadn’t noticed, so the word expanded through the room freely instead of going straight to his shoulders. It filled the space between them, but Senku could breathe just as easily as before. Gen had stopped looking at him, as if he wasn’t waiting for an answer. There was no pressure, no expectations, it was just them there.
They both stayed looking at the stars, passing the telescope from one to the other. Gen would sometimes ask questions and Senku would answer them, softly, there was no need to raise their voices. It was comfortable, nice. Senku could just think about the stars, they could just talk. Gen was still pretty and Senku hadn’t fundamentally changed to notice it.