We Need to Talk

by That_Indie_Reviewer

Summary:

Five multiverses are in serious need of some conversation and therapy. Best to get them talking. Who knew that a pirate, a convict, a naïve vault dweller, a hero fanboy and the princess of Hell would make for such a nuanced discord.

Crossover of MHA, OPLA, Hazbin Hotel, Arcane, Fallout. Four of the big shows that came out last year and one that needs to always be in one of these multiverse chat-fics.

Notes:

• Inspired by A Ripple Across Worlds by Orangeup
• Inspired by Multiversal Support Chat Group by Hypn0s

Many, many, many universe crossover chats emerging on Ao3 and what do I say in response?

Another one.

Let’s get this show on the road without too much preamble. The choices for inclusion came from five shows I got into over the past year that came out roughly the same time (sort of, semantics). Fallout and Hazbin Hotel from Amazon Prime, One Piece Live Action (OPLA) and Arcane from Netflix and My Hero Academia from... Crunchyroll, I don’t know. But it seems par for the course that these chat fics have at least an appearance from either MHA or Persona. For me, i have more experience with MHA than Persona despite repeated attempts to get into it. But I'm mostly here for the gags. There is some overlap between these shows as you are aware, so the comparisons should emerge over time.

Chapter 1: Settling into the chat

In the vast vacuum of existence there exists the multiverse. A cornucopia of different realities teaming with possibility. In one reality, an experiment was conducted to determine what would happen if these realities converged with one another. To see what would happen, how would they interact, what would change in their reality as timelines diverge.

Then a bunch of other Multiversal Physicists caught wind of this idea and copied it for their own.

Hey, what’s the worst that could happen. Its not like plagiarism or copyright infringement was a constant between realities. Except for the reality where it is. And what lawyer would pursue such a claim? Except for the reality where one did. But it’s not affecting this one, so this one will be the focus.

Here was delivered to five individuals across the multiversal plane a relevant bit of software that downloaded into their communication device of choice to allow perfect speech to text. Accompanying this was a message reading:

“You have been chosen to take part in a cultural exchange. You can opt out at any time but hopefully you will stick around and interact with a variety of unique people and new ways of looking at the world. Just talk into your device and read your companions updates.” -K

Message delivered.

Software enabled.

Link start.

---

K, User 1, User 2, User 3, User 4, User 5 have been added to the chat.

 

User1: Um...Hi. I just found this installed on my pentascroll. How is that possible?

User 2: Hey, uh, what is this thing? My phone just pinged me.

User 3: The hell is this shit? How'd a Hextech tablet end up in my cell.

User 4: Okie Doki, what’s going on here? My pipboy just lit up with something fierce.

User 5: Hey there. I'm Monkey D Luffy and I’m gonna be King of the Pirates! Where did this weird Den-Den Mushi come from?

User 5 name changed to Luffy

User 1: Well, hello there Luffy, it’s a pleasure to meet you. My name is Charlie.

User 1 name changed to Charlie

User 4: Oooh, finally some new friendly...well, not faces... voices, lines of text? I’m Lucy McLean and I’m so grateful to have someone to talk to.

User 4 name changed to Lucy

User 3: So polite, how did I end up with such a bunch of prissy tools? Also, who’s the monkey?

User 2: Yeah, um, did he say he was a pirate?

Luffy: I’m a different kind of pirate.

Charlie: You’re redeeming the concept of piracy! Thathathathat’s incredible!

User 2: Woah yeah, it’s like your a hero in the world of pirates.

Luffy: Hey now, I’m no hero. Don’t insult me like that.

User 2: Wait what? But being a hero is the highest compliment anyone can get.

User 3: Pfft, seriously? Being a hero is not all it's cracked up to be. Especially when none are around to help the folk who are really suffering.

Charlie: Now, now, let's hear this out. Both sides deserve a chance to speak their mind, and we can reach a compromise.

Lucy: Yes, thank you! Seriously, why does no one want to do that up here?

User 2: Erm, up here?

Charlie: Now Luffy, please tell us why you think being called a hero is an insult.

Luffy: A hero is someone who shares their meat. They give out their meat to other people and help them. But I want all the meat for myself. It's my meat, no one else can have it.

Charlie: ...wait what...

User 3: Finally, someone after my own heart. This guy gets it. You’re alright monkey boy. Call me Vi.

User 3 name changed to Vi

Lucy: Wait, seriously, that’s all you have to say. What kind of debate is that?

User 2: No, no, actually, I understand what he means. Some people are driven more by personal gain. Others are driven by altruism. But you said you are a different kind of pirate, so I’m guessing you help people in some roundabout, following your own logic kind of way.

Luffy: I usually get lunch.

Lucy: OK, hold on. I guess if that’s your method I won’t fault it, but it is all it takes for you to abide the golden rule is to get a free meal.

Luffy: You never know when the next meal is going to come. But usually, I’ve seen people who get that feeling so they usually get me.

User 2: I suppose I can’t fault you for that. Miss Charlie, has the debate been settled?

Charlie: Right, yes, sorry. Wait, yes, the conflict is resolved! That. Was. Exhilarating! This is going to be so much help going forward with my rehabilitation project.

Vi: Rehab, yeesh, you must be fun at parties. Your first input into something finally gives me a decent conversation in years and it’s like some quack doctor trying to get me to look at the ink blots.

Charlie: Ahem. That aside. User 2, you’ve been unusually quiet. What seems to be troubling you? Oh, wait, sorry, name. I never even asked your name.

Vi: You are the worst therapist ever.

Charlie: I'm not a therapist.

Luffy: Oh good, Shanks told me about those types of people and that I should never try to be like them. He killed the last one he came across.

Lucy: He killed a therapist.

Luffy: Didn’t hear what happened. Just that he was doing something inappropriate with some lady and that he lost his family jewels. I think they said his name was Geld.

Charlie: ...oh...oh no... Luffy I think he was the rapist, and he was gelded.

Luffy: That’s it. I didn’t like what he did, least what Shanks told me, so I didn’t lose any sleep over what happened to him. Apparently, they let the woman do that.

Vi: Preferably with her bare hands.

Lucy: I hate to push the conversation away from this topic, especially when it merits much more deliberation and meditation. But I fear we are leaving out our quiet little friend.

User 2: Oh um, sorry, didn't mean to pull focus. By all means we should continue, this is an important conversation to have.

Vi: No, you have a valid reason for being here. We won't ignore you. Though I am glad you're at least acknowledging it.

User 2: Sniff...erm, thanks, thank you. My name is Izuku Midoriya and I just had a really rough day.

User 2 name changed to Izuku

Izuku: Oh, um, normally I would go with Midoriya since I don't know the rest of you very well and it might be, well, a bit informal.

Lucy: Izuku...are you perhaps... erm, Asian?

Charlie: Oh my Grandpa, Lucy, you can't just ask someone if they are Asian?

Izuku name changed to Midoriya

Midoriya: Oh, well, actually I'm Japanese. I'm not sure why it causes you discomfort. Do you feel comfortable talking about it?

Vi: It's cause she's racist.

Lucy: Woah, hey now, don't get it twisted. If anything, the Japanese were our biggest allies. Their technological boom and reconstruction work post war was a source of inspiration for many Americans and led to advancements in many resources we use today. It just sounded vaguely Chinese that I-

Vi: Racist. Doesn't matter if its against one group instead of the other, if you have to make a distinction, it means you have a preference for one over the other.

Charlie: lets take a detour and discuss Lucy's underlying racially charged mindset at a later date. we address each issue one at a time.

Lucy: No, wait-

Luffy: You heard the lady. Lets talk about your racing problem another time. Our friend needs our help.

Vi: Racing... are you only half listening to this conversation?

Midoriya: Friend... that's so kind of you. Oh, um, sorry Lucy, I'm sure you didn't mean to sound, well, you know, I'm guessing the chat feature really doesn't translate well to unfiltered thoughts.

Vi: yeah just look at Luffy.

Lucy: Oh don't you even. And thank you Midoriya.

Charlie: Focus people. Ahem. Midoriya, proceed.

Midoriya: Well. Here I was, having a pretty normal day, I see the normal patrols, I get to school a little late because of some villain. Then my teacher has to reveal in front of god and everybody that I'm looking to get into UA. And just because... well, I have my reasons to feel pretty bitter about it. Then my class laughs at me, then my friend, I don't know what happened, but something must have got under his skin because he was as mad as a trapped jaguar. He blows up my journal, uses his quirk on me and then he tells me... well, he was very insensitive.

Lucy: Wait, hold on.

Midoriya: Oh and then I go and get absolutely trashed by another villain. I almost die. When suddenly I'm saved by my greatest hero All Might. Who goes and signs my journal and gives me resuscitation. 

Charlie: In that order!?

Midoriya: no, no, I'm sure it was the reverse. But yeah, he goes and carts me off to some building, granted I may have held onto him while he jumped because I really wanted to ask him questions and... well... when he goes and starts answering those questions, it's not the answers I want to hear.

Vi: Did you seriously jump onto a guys leg after surviving an attack-sorry sorry, that's not the best thing to ask, your ranting, I'll let you finish.

Midoriya: Then what goes and happens but the villain from before escapes and goes on a rampage. And who gets caught but my friend. Oh, my friend from before. With the journal. And none of the heroes can get close. So he starts going wild and I mean he's really scared. He has this look in his eyes like he needed some help. And I just...

Luffy: Tell us. What did you do? 

Midoriya: It was foolish but... sorry I was so caught up in my rant I didn't notice you were all talking over me.

Luffy: You're only stupid if you stop now. Come on, keep going.

Midoriya: I ran in there. He needed help so I gave it to him. I know it was dangerous, I know I shouldn't be throwing my life away but... my body just started moving.

Luffy: You remind me of Shanks and my brothers. They didn't care who was in danger, they just ran in there like its nothing. Because they are heroes. I love heroes but I don't want to be one.

Lucy: You followed the golden rule perfectly; Do unto others as you would have done unto you. No way would I condemn your actions.

Charlie: A true sign of a good soul is the willingness to strive past your limits of your morals, to really challenge yourself and help others without the possibility of a reward. Because that's when you know that an act is done out of pure altruism.

Vi: I'm not going to pile on some more praise because I'm certain you need to learn a lesson, a hard won lesson, about self preservation. But I can dig your whole deal. I would've done the same. In fact, I did do the same.

Midoriya: Yeah, that begs the question, what did you mean by talking to a doctor and Lucy what did you mean about being up here, do you live below ground.

Vi: I guess me and Lucy both do, I've been underground for the past who knows how long at this stage, the days run together. Prison is no fairy tail.

Midoriya: YOU'RE IN PRISON! Lucy, what about you?

Lucy: Ahh, no. Until recently I lived in a vault with the remainder of my family until we were violently and viciously attacked by raiders and one of them, their leader, stole my Dad. I'm not even sure why she stole him but gosh darn it I'm going after him even if no one else will brave the wasteland.

Vi: Wasteland hold up, what? Also, what is Japan? And China? And Asia?

Lucy: You don't even know what they are and you decided to put me on blast. Not cool daddio. 

Charlie: Daddio? You sound like my friend Angel, are you from the same time period? He died in the forties. 

Midoriya: DIED? Okay, this is getting crazy. Can we have a layout of where we are and... when we are? 

Lucy: Hey yeah, what is up with not knowing China, they literally caused this whole mess.

Luffy: What mess? The seas everywhere or the whole thing with the nut jobs with fishbowls.

Charlie: ...What...where are you guys?

Midoriya: I guess I'll go first. 

Luffy: Yeah, what's up with calling people villains. Are you into comic books or something, like Germa.

Midoriya: I live in a world of heroes and villains. Many years ago, people started being born with quirks in their DNA that gave them super powers. People began doing things right out of the comic books and started flying, shooting energy out their hands and lifting entire buildings with one hand. You guys know about the glowing baby right.

Vi: This was done with technology right?

Midoriya: Biologically.

Vi: Oh fuck. Yeah, no, I live in a world ruled by arcane technology. Everything from the blimps to the teleporter run on these wild runes and crystals that some magic scientist wackjob nearly killed me over. And... actually killed people over. It's all over the place and I just... I have to live with that. All around me.

Charlie: Vi come back to us. Don't worry, we're here. You are in the here and now.

Vi: Sorry, just... not feeling myself you know.

Lucy: I guess I'm next. I mean, woah, magic, superpowers. I've read a few of my brothers comics, a little bit of the Silver Shadow and Grognok, Manta Man. But, I don't know, maybe people like that exist in the wasteland. I mean, the whole world has been irradiated since before I was born. Ever since the bombs fell, courtesy of China, mind you, we've only been hearing what our readings tell us. Radiation is everywhere and maybe some people are getting superpowers.

Midoriya: Huh, I guess that would explain why China was the first to develop a glowing baby but our world certainly did not end, at least not in that way.

Lucy: In what other way could it happen?

Charlie: Wait, all of this is happening on Earth or at least Earth adjacent!?

Lucy: ...Charlie, why are all our worlds seeming less insane by comparison?

Charlie: I thought you were all based in hell and were put in contact with me so you could get started on your rehabilitation through my Hazbin Hotel. I only got permission thanks to my father being too distracted to raise any hell over my trying to undermine his status quo.

Vi: ...Charlie...who is your dad?

Charlie: Lucifer. Morningstar.

Vi: I thought for sure I was on hell on earth but somehow you come to me telling me that I have that to look forward to.

Midoriya: Evil exists on an empirical scale.

Lucy: The Devil. Your father is the devil and Hell is real.

Luffy: Is he the one who gave me the Gum Gum Fruit? It's the devil fruit that turned me into rubber.

Midoriya: Rubber. You're made of rubber, how, why, when? I have so many questions, the logistics. Why devil fruit, who would call it that? WHAT?

Luffy: Well it's because it stops me from swimming. If I fall in the water, I start drowning. Which is easy to do when most of the world is nothing but ocean. Don't know how I'm navigating it but I got my little boat and I'm heading on an adventure to find the One Piece. And become... KING OF THE PIRATES!

Midoriya: I I I I I, I'm getting my quirk from All Might! oh gosh, I was so overwhelmed that I just had to say something. But even that doesn't compare to what you've told me.

Luffy: ... Who? Sorry, I zoned out for that last bit about the time you were talking about being a hero. What did I miss?

Chapter 2: Rolling right along

Notes:

Thanks for the feedback and the engagement. Let's keep it rolling like we're Doc Holliday. Any changes you think I should make, feel free to leave your suggestions in the comments below.

Be aware that I'm unsure if I can keep up a steady pace of updates. The first couple of chapters will be coming out every couple of days and there may be a stretch where I hit a wall or I might be burdened by the daily plight of earning a living. I merely appeal to your patience. But if you wish to show your support and engagement by typing in "When the next chapter" or "This fic still alive?", well i won't stop you.

Lucy: OK, so we’re all on the same page. All our worlds went through a cataclysm or an apocalypse of some sort. Midoriya, your world was World War Three with super powers.

Midoriya: Right.

Lucy: My world was World War Three with nuclear bombs.

Vi: Yeah, I still don’t get what those are. I mean, bombs that wipe out entire cities, at that point what's even the point if you can’t use the resources, the land or even the people if it’s all dead.

Lucy: Vi is an imperialist, good to know.

Vi: Wait no!

Lucy: Yeah... not so fun when the shoe is on the other foot.

Vi: I will beat you with a shoe, don’t try that imperialist shit, I ain’t like that.

Lucy: Sooo, Vi your world went through some arbitrary cataclysm that might have something to do with magic, at least that’s what we’ve been able to interpret.

Vi: I’m no historian. You want smarts, then talk to my... talk to the brain boxes who live in Piltover, they have time to learn useless crap.

Lucy: It’s more than we’re getting from Luffy who... I’m sorry Luffy, are you sure you didn’t learn anything in school about your world's history?

Luffy: Nope, never went. Spent all my time in the mountains with a bunch of smelly mountain bandits. As far as I care, history began twenty-two years ago when Gold Roger, King of the Pirates, was executed and everyone started looking for the One Piece.

Charlie: Three

Luffy: Huh?

Charlie: Sorry don’t mind me.

Lucy: Uh huh, speaking of, Charlie you... your world scares me so much to even contemplate but it technically follows scripture in that your apocalyptic event is literally the plot of Paradise Lost and resulted in the creation of Hell.

Luffy: Oh yeah, I wanted to ask, do you think Hell exists in my world, we got Devil fruits and we get actual powers?

Midoriya: Quite honestly the implications are far more evident than any of ours that Hell exists in your world but that carries so many ethical and moral dilemmas. I mean, does knowing mean my motivations are tainted by fear, do i only do good so I can avoid Hell, I’m not exactly practicing the Christian faith so will my lack of faith mean I get sent to a Christian afterlife I know is more than likely real?

Charlie: Woah, woah, woah, Midoriya, breath for me, we don’t need to spiral right now. OK? In for four, hold for seven and release for eight seconds. Keep it up until you feel steady.

Midoriya: OK, OK, I’m good, I just... gimme a minute.

Luffy: I don’t really do complicated like that. The way I see it, you have to do what makes you happy. If that means doing things that people think are wrong, then I’m doing them without regret.

Midoriya: But what if it means doing wrong, I mean you're a pirate. Luffy: Then I’ll be the best pirate. King of the pirates.

Charlie: Four.

Vi: So, guys, I going to go radio silent, I’ll probably be out of it for a while. It's usually around now they send in the fucker with the stick.

Lucy: Wait what?! Vi are you being beaten? Vi? VI?

Midoriya: Oh gosh, this is horrible. There must be something we can do, right guys.

Charlie: Oh darn darn darny darn! She’s getting beaten and all we can do is sit here and do nothing.

Luffy: I wouldn’t worry about it. She's a fighter.

Lucy: Wha... wait. We literally just met. How can you be sure about anything, I just...

Luffy: I’ve got a good feeling. It’s why I helped out Coby here.

Charlie: Coby? Who’s Coby? When did Coby enter the picture?

Luffy: Sure, I picked up Coby from some ugly sea beast and now I’m taking him to another island. Need to find a map and make sure Coby can join the marines.

User: Luffy I’m sitting right here.

User name changed to Coby.

Charlie: Well, hello there Coby, will you be joining us?

Coby: Oh, um hello, sorry, I’m still adjusting. An hour ago I was a prisoner on a horrible pirate ship and now I’m helping Luffy sail to the nearest marine base.

Midoriya: Pardon but doesn’t that seem a bit counter-intuitive having a pirate go to a marine base.

Lucy: Oh right yeah, the marines are like the main force in your world. Like, international police or that one you told me about Midoriya, the HSPC.

Midoriya: HSPC

Lucy: Right, wow, there are so many massive governments out there. There is so much I can learn by observing how your worlds are run. If my world is ever going to recover, we’re going to need some really good examples to follow.

Charlie: GUYS GUYS GUYS!

Midoriya: Woah, what what what?

Charlie: Holy shit you guys, my dad just called, and he wants me to head to the Heaven Embassy and talk to the Angels. There’s so much to do I I I I I I-

Midoriya: Charlie, the breathing exercises, remember the breathing exercises. One, two, three, four.

Charlie: Gasp, right thank you. But I really got to check this out. I know Vi is in a really shitty situation, but I can’t help her by sitting her and panicking. GASP, what if I work with the Angels to find a way to cross into other worlds and help her!

Lucy: They can do that?

Charlie: They’re angels, they work for heaven, they’re practically omnipotent. First, I gotta pitch my idea for the Hazbin Hotel, then, once I’ve softened them up, I can appeal to their better nature to help others and we can get Vi out of there in no time flat.

Lucy: I love this plan, I’m excited to be part of it. This is the most amount of positivity I’ve had in days. The last person I talked to said I needed to give up on my dad and go home. Well, if you’re not giving up on helping others, then neither am I.

Midoriya: Holy woah, yeah, that positivity is incredible Charlie, you gotta do it. If you can save Vi, you’ll be a hero in my book.

Coby: You guys are just so positive. Won’t lie, it’s making me feel better. Is this how you feel everyday Luffy?

Midoriya: It’s like Luffy said, we have to do our best without regret.

Luffy: See, these guys get it. You just have to go with the flow.

Coby: Alright, yeah, OK, let's do it! I’m joining the marines.

Lucy: Um, one sticking point. How are you going to get past the marines as a pirate?

Luffy: Hey, I’m stealthy.

Coby: HOLY SHIT LUFFY! The ship just blew up. It must have been the fire you started.

Luffy: They didn’t put it out?

Midoriya: Charlie you may want to ask the angels to help out Luffy while you're at it.

Charlie: On my to do list. In the meantime, I’ll leave you in the capable hands of my wonderful girlfriend Vaggie.

User added. Name changed to Vaggie.

Vaggie: Ayo, what the f-, Charlie, please don’t land me with babysitting duty for a bunch of toddlers.

Charlie: Vaggie I am locked in. No distractions. Sorry guys but I cannot afford to make another mistake. This is my last opportunity to make a fresh impression and gain some support for the hotel. Relax Vaggie, the kids are alright.

Lucy: We are not kids!

Luffy: That’s right.

Midoriya: That’s right.

Lucy: ...Ok I’m not.

Vaggie: Maldita sea, está bien. I’d go after her but mi amor has gone into Broadway mode. There’s no stopping her now.

Lucy: Broadway. I remember that word. That’s an aircraft carrier right.

Vaggie: If it was, I'd be so much more engaged. No, it’s part enchantment and part bloodline here in Hell. Basically, when the feeling hits, if it’s strong enough, then we burst into coordinated song and dance. I think Charlie’s madre started it.

Midoriya: Isn’t that a little... weird, sorry to say.

Vaggie: Eh, more an inconvenience. It’s weird, sometimes it feels like I’m the only one who notices when it happens. Everyone else, the sinners, overlords, the Sins, hellborn, they all just roll with it.

Midoriya: huh, curious.

Luffy: Wait, you sing and dance all day. That sounds like the best time ever. Say, I’ve been thinking about who I want for my crew, we could do with a musician. Any chance you or Charlie want to join?

Midoriya: Wait, Luffy, shouldn’t your priority be the map, maybe a doctor, you know, in case you get sick or injured.

Luffy: I never get sick. Not once. Plus, I’m made of rubber. Only thing taking me down is a badass sword.

Lucy: And water.

Luffy: That too.

Vaggie: Hold up. How are you even getting around. The whole world is ocean and the ship you just left is on fire.

Luffy: We’re going to have to trade up. Maybe I can find a big enough ship for me and my crew. Five masts should do. Coby: I should’ve stayed on the burning ship.

Midoriya: To change topics a little bit. Vajjie, am I saying your name right?

Vaggie: NO! Sorry, but it’s Vaggie. Midoriya: OH SORRY! I just... why is meeting with Heaven so important, I mean, you guys are pretty much on the other side of things.

Vaggie: Mainly we want to stop the exterminations.

Lucy: I’m sorry, the WHAT NOW!?

Vi: Hey guys, I’m back. Got freed by some cupcake and not a bruise to be had. What’s this I’m hearing about an extermination. WHO HAS THE BALLS?

---

Oh these guys are just living their best lives aren’t they. Not worries about corruption, conspiracies or genocide... wait scratch that last one. All this positivity is bound to smooth the rougher edges off each other and maybe, with enough time, they can start opening up about some of their more sensitive issues. Then again. Some attitudes from different walks of life are bound to ruffle some feathers. Kids who have never seen peace and kids who have never seen war have different values! Said the war criminal. Who knows, maybe Lucy and Midoriya will experience some new changes.

Chapter 3: This chat's getting weirder all the time

Summary:

Life is weird, especially when four lives are happening at the same time.

Vi: OK, why is it every time I log back into this chat, I’m going to see some new demo site of information that could have been brought to my attention YESTERDAY!?  

Lucy: Mostly so we don’t spiral. First is the introduction of Hell as a reality and not just a construct of religious dogma or a state or absence of being. I think throwing in the notion that people in Hell end up the victims of systemic genocide apparently perpetrated by the benevolent entities of Gods kingdom might be a little too much to handle in a single bite.  

User 7: If these are the people you’ve been in contact with during your stay in Stillwater, it’s no wonder you’ve become such anti-social pariah even for a prison.  

Vi: Thank you, Cupcake.  

User 7: It’s Caitlyn. Why do you insist on calling me-  

Vi: Because you are one. Rich, fancy decoration, unhealthy if it spends too much time in my company.  

User 7 name changed to Cupcake  

Cupcake: NO, no you don’t, it’s Caitlyn!  

Cupcake changed to Caitlyn  

Caitlyn: Better. I can see what you mean by unhealthy in YOUR company. I’m already starting to sound like you.  

Vi: Well, you're going to smell a whole lot like me too.  

Caitlyn: What are you implying- OH MY... she just jumped into a pit. Jumped. Pit. Jumped in a pit.   

Vaggie: Well, you better go catch her then.  

Caitlyn: I can’t do half the things she’s doing right now. I should wait for the tram. It won’t do for an officer of the law to be seen crawling around pipes and drains.  

Midoriya: As an officer of the law, you are bound to care for your charge. Duty comes before preference. That’s what All Might says as the country’s leading hero.  

Caitlyn: Ugh... arguing with a child... FINE. Fine, I’ll go. She must have planned this, why else would she give me this tablet to hold.  

Caitlyn logged off.  

Midoriya: I’m not a child.  

Lucy: Actually, that begs the question. I don’t really know how old most of you are. I know we’re still tabling the whole extermination topic, but I just need to gather my wits before we start tiptoeing in that stream.  

Luffy: Seventeen. I sailed out of windmill village the moment the year started.  

Lucy: I can’t tell, is that young to start adventuring or the right time to head out?  

Luffy: It was a promise. We would head out for the seas when we turned seventeen and became strong enough. I wanted to head out early, the sea was calling me, but I made a promise to Ace. What about you guys?  

Lucy: We only consider the Vault exchanges once someone turns eighteen, but I was eligible for breeding when I turned twenty-one.  

Midoriya: I’m sorry, breeding.  

Lucy: Standard vault practice. We share links with two other vaults, thirty-one and thirty-three. Every couple of years we exchange resources to sustain our survival. Maize, parts, work force and a new generation of Vault Dwellers.  

Luffy: I’m lost. You give... people?  

Lucy: We exchange based on needs. And the needs of the Vaults with limited space, thus limited population, means we need to shift around who lives where. I mean, cousin stuff is fun for practice but unsuitable for long term genetic variety. So, to prevent inbreeding, we offer willing, healthy individuals to sustain our population.  

Vaggie: I’m sorry, what the fuck? Are you, like, the apocalyptic Alabama? I swear nothing changes on earth.   

Midoriya: Yeah, Lucy, that seems really, kind of, ethically dubious and-  

Vaggie: It’s cattle trading with extra steps. That’s what it is Midoriya. Haven’t you learned about slavery in school?  

Midoriya: OK, I’m fourteen but I’m not that naive.   

Vaggie: Damn, I’m like the oldest here. I’m like twenty-five.  

Luffy: But how long have you been twenty-five?  

Vaggie: Wait what?  

Midoriya: Oh yeah, because if you are in Hell, that means you passed away and continued to live in the afterlife, gaining experience, learning new things and having autonomy to make choices.  

Vaggie: I’m gonna cut you off right there pendejo’s. One, yeah I did pass away and reincarnated in the afterlife. But two, you don’t ask a lady her age unless you want to lose your cabezas. Ahora cállate y pasemos a otra cosa.  

Luffy: Got it. I apologize.   

Lucy: You understood what she said.  

Luffy: No, but Makino always told me to never insult someone I don’t know and to apologize when I do.  

Vaggie: You are the type of person who either does that too many times or has to be reminded every time.  

Luffy: Wow, you are good at that.  

Caitlyn and Vi have logged in  

Caitlyn: OK, I found her. Turns out she just wants food.  

Lucy: You make her sound like a stray dog. Well, I’m off to check out this settlement, good luck with that.  

Vi: Wait what did you say? Get back here! I’ll get you for that one later!  

Caitlyn: You’re yelling at a tablet, everyone is looking.  

Vi: Nah, everyone thinks I’m just a shimmer addict. This will help our cover.  

Midoriya: Screaming in public helps your cover.  

Caitlyn: Well, it’s so overt it loops around to being covert.  

Midoriya: Hey, a thought occurs… why are a bunch of other people getting involved in this multiverse chat room? Isn’t this supposed to be a secret?    

Charlie: No. Why?  

Midoriya: I don’t know, it just seems like one of those world breaking pieces of technology that only a select few should know about. Suddenly I’m chatting to another person who just seems unbothered by this whole situation.  

Charlie: oh, you mean Vaggie. Yeah, I let her know about it pretty much immediately.  

Vi: How?   

Charlie: She asked.  

Lucy: Ummm, no offence but shouldn’t there be a little operational security for something like this. I have to agree with Midoriya on this one.  

 

Vi: You’re just pandering to him for brownie points.   

 

Lucy: No! That’s not true. It’s not like that at all.  

 

Midoriya: C’mon Vi, lay off of her.  

 

Vi: I’m just saying I wouldn’t take her intolerance lying down. Make her squirm a little.  

 

Midoriya: Moving on. I get what you’re saying Charlie about telling Vaggie, especially because… because… the two of you are you know… together.  

 

Vi: Feeling a little squeamish there Midoriya?  

 

Caitlyn: Yes Midoriya, is there something that makes you uncomfortable?  

 

Vi: Dammit Lucy, you infected him. Now there’s another one!  

 

Lucy: Dammit would you just…just…just P off alright.  

 

Midoriya: Sorry. I didn’t mean to come off that way. I just have difficulty talking about relationships in general.  

 

Vi: P off. Seriously, miss prissy over here with profanity filter. Told you I’d get you back.  

 

Caitlyn: It does make for a nice balance over listening to your vulgarity nonstop.  

 

Vi: THANK YOU CUPCAKE! That’s really helpful. And seriously Middy, relationships make you uncomfortable? Have you even spoken to a girl outside of this chat.  

 

Midoriya: Well, I… holy crap, your all girls!  

 

Luffy: No I’m not!  

 

Charlie: Did it seriously just dawn on you?  

 

Midoriya: Sorry. The concept didn’t fully hit me until now that I was speaking to you guys without any anxiety or any chance of being rejected outright or the fact that I’m not expecting milk in my locker after school.  

 

Caitlyn: Good Lord that’s horrible. Do you go through that on a daily basis?  

 

Caitlyn: Midoriya?  

 

Lucy: Izuku, are you there? Well, saying his first name didn’t shock him.  

 

Charlie: Midoriya… you don’t have to forgive them. You know that right. I just had to deal with some dude bro frat dick saying he’s going to kill everything I love. I’m not going to forgive that anytime soon. It doesn’t make you or I a hypocrite if we try to help people and decide we’re not going to forgive some of them. Vaggie helped me see that, maybe we can too.  

 

Vi: …you’re pretty good at that sometimes, Y’know.  

 

Midoriya: Um… can we talk about that instead of me now?  

 

Charlie: Sure thing. Well, Vaggie saw me chatting on my phone. I’ll grant you, ever since I started this hotel my contact list has sort of shrunk. I think I’ve been burning too many bridges unintentionally. Even my aunts and uncles only call occasionally. They might be a little peeved I’m encroaching on their sin territory and reducing their effectiveness.  

 

Lucy: There is a lot to unpack from that.  

 

Charlie: Regardless, Vaggie asked, and I told her, because I trust her.  

 

Midoriya: Just like that. I wish it were that easy.  

 

Coby: I’m literally here just because I was in proximity to Luffy.  

 

Luffy: Well, I trust you.  

 

Coby: Oh.  

 

Charlie: Finding someone you can share this with is important and yes, this is something that we can’t share with everyone, but those few that you can trust, I’d say go for it.  

 

Midoriya: You’re right. Guys, I’ll finish with my last bit of training and then I’ll be right back.  

 

Midoriya has logged off.  

 

Vi: Bet you anything he’s going to tell this All Might guy.  

 

Lucy: You ruined it. We were having this beautiful moment, and you ruined it.  

 

Charlie: I’ll get in on that action. Bet you anything he’ll tell someone else.  

 

Lucy: I stood up for you and you let me down.  

 

Luffy: Ooh, someone’s grouchy.  

 

Lucy: I just wish I had someone I could talk to. It’s been so lonely and weird up here. The last person I had a serious conversation with told me I’m unprepared and need to go home. Since then, I’ve had most of my water taken and I’ve been accosted by vendors just for having an opinion about my home in the Vaults.  

 

Vi: Try going five years in solitary where the most meaningful conversations I’ve had are being beaten with a stick in a particular way or helping some Piltie enforcer go on a tour of Zaun.  

 

Caitlyn: I can just as easily bring you back if you miss those conversations so much.  

 

Vi: Mrow, cupcakes got claws. Don’t worry, here is where we can find some information.  

 

Caitlyn: did you bring me to a Fucking BROTHEL!  

 

Caitlyn and Vi have logged off.  

 

Lucy: Those leave a lot of room for far too many implications.  

 

Vaggie: Make sure Midoriya doesn’t see this, he’d probably have an aneurysm from just thinking about it.  

 

Charlie: Say Lucy don’t let what Vi said diminish your feelings. Everyone is entitled to their own sorrow. There are no metrics for this, so there is no need to compare.   

 

Lucy: You’re saying my suffering is just as valid as hers.  

 

Charlie: As anyone’s.   

 

Luffy: Hey guys, I’m going to go break into the Marine base, wish me luck.  

 

Charlie: Wait, Luffy, what are you… huh?  

 

Midoriya: Guys I’m back. This is my mother. Mom, meet the support group I told you about.  

 

Vi: Caitlyn if you see this message, enjoy your time at the brothel, I’m going to beat the shit out of some bitch.  

 

Lucy: Guys, someone just rolled into the settlement and just started shooting up the place! One guy is down a foot and there are bodies everywhere!  

 

Charlie:…hello Mrs Midoriya. You’ve joined our chat at quite a busy time.  

 

Notes:

We'll keep trucking along as we power through the formative seasons of our heroes. Because the thought occurs, three of these only have one season and one has over seven.
That's why I'd like to clarify some details about this chat fic. The lines of dialogue you see are recordings of the people speaking and text to speech being uploaded into text.

Chapter 4: Everyone is hurting, physically now!

Summary:

Maybe we can convince Mamadoriya that everyone here is stable. Why do I here boss music?

User 7: Izuku… what is going on. 

Midoriya: Mom, this is my support group. 

User 7: Support group. With a group of adults, cult members, prisoners and pirates! 

Charlie: Pleasure to meet you Mrs Midoriya. 

User 7 name changed to Mrs Midoriya 

Mrs Midoriya: What are your intentions with my son using this chat? 

Midoriya: Wait MOM... you are considering all the wrong implications. This is not some... um... 

Charlie: What Midoriya is trying to say- 

Vi: We’re not trying to sleep with a fourteen-year-old. That’s gross. 

Lucy: VI PHRASING! Apologies for such an off the cuff response. I understand this is quite an alarming situation to discover but rest assured that Midoriya is here, much like the rest of us, as a consenting individual in discussion, communication and support structures. 

Mrs Midoriya: I see... apologies if I was curt, and I do still have some concerns about all this, but I am willing to listen. 

Luffy: Wow you’re pretty good at that Lucy. 

Charlie: Holy smokes how’d you do that? 

Lucy: Just my natural inclination. When meeting strangers I usually have a fifty-fifty chance of talking them down from conflict. Which i should probably return to right now. 

Charlie: Wait, what were you saying about a gun fight? 

Vi: Were you talking to us while folks were getting shot. 

Lucy: Talking helps me calm down. Besides, I tried shooting him, but he just laughed. 

Charlie: Oh God... and Luffy what did you do? 

Luffy: I’m just helping my new friend help me steal a map to the Grand Line. 

User 8: I agreed to nothing and stop talking while we’re sneaking dammit. 

Luffy: She’s annoyed that I caught her. 

User 8: And I caught you, falling from the ceiling and walking through the marine base like it's no big deal. 

Luffy: See we work together so well. 

Vaggie: It’s nuts, the chat is made up of three guys who can talk no jutsu out of their problems and somehow Luffy seems like the most successful one. 

Lucy: Oh yeah, well watch this. 

Lucy has activated Livestream 

Midoriya: Huh. I had no idea we could do that. 

Mrs Midoriya: Where is that place? It looks like America, but I can’t be sure. 

Vaggie: No, I’m pretty sure that is America. She said it was nuked to hell but honestly, I can’t tell the difference. 

Mrs Midoriya: NUKED! 

Midoriya: MOM! Guys, my mom has fainted, I need to help her. I’ll check back later. 

Charlie: So far so good, keep everyone calm Lucy. Now bring it home. 

Lucy: I’m going to have to ask you to leave him alone. 

Now, I acknowledge that I’m unfamiliar with your circumstances. 

But, at first glance, your treatment of this man appears unfair, and I’m obliged to intervene. 

Now, if your instinct is to harm me, as a person simply trying to deescalate a conflict, then I’ll have to assume, of the two of you, you are likely the primary aggressor. 

In which case, I think everyone in this town would agree that force is justified. Unless you willingly stand down now. 

Vi: eeehhh... a little too much tell and not enough show. Now I’m no good at math but I put the odds at around... 

User: Well now that is a very small drop in a very large bucket of drugs. 

Vi: Get the hell out of there! Lucy, don’t just freeze- HOLY SHIT is that like... a super enforcer, where did the walking tin can come from? 

Luffy: Awesome, a giant robot! Wonder if that would help fighting this axe hand guy. 

User 8: A little help here! 

Luffy: Sorry guys, back in second. 

Luffy has logged out 

Vi: Alright, enough of this soft shit, I’ll show you how it's done. 

Vi has begun a livestream. 

Vaggie: Damn!  Check out that right hook. 

Vi: Sevika, you filthy traitor! 

User: Vander had his chance. 

Vaggie: Nice follow up. She’s got a good flow to this. C’mon, keep up the pressure. 

Charlie: ooh, watch out. Mind yourself Vi. Oh! Sword arm, she’s got a sword arm. 

Luffy: NICE! FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT! 

User 8: Hey, focus, we got an axe guy after us. 

User: OK, pause, who the hell is talking? Is there someone watching, where are those voices coming from? 

Vi: From my head... you hear them too? 

User: What the... 

Charlie: Oof, slow down Vi, you’re fighting angry. 

Vaggie: Ignore her, keep pushing. Wait no, don’t get cornered- and she’s through a wall. 

User: I see you never learned patience. Maybe your little audience can help you out. 

Vaggie: Too many hits. If you can’t hit her strong enough then dodge until you can. 

Vi: Stay out of it! 

Charlie: When can Caitlyn get here? 

Vaggie: Now we’re talking. Get the knee’s in there, yeah that’s it! 

Charlie: Yeah, ring that clock, clean her bell. 

Vi: What the hell? 

User: What the hell? 

Vaggie: Charlie, baby, your trash talk is coming off more innuendo than mean. 

Charlie: Oh for real? 

Vi: Dude, ring her bell! 

User: Clean her clock! How do you mix those up? Speaking of, I need to clean my claws. 

Charlie: Oh damn, she’s stabbed, she’s fucking stabbed! 

User: Thanks for the play by play but I need to wrap things up here. 

Vi: Dammit, stop! Where... where is she? Powder, tell me where she is! What’s Silko doing to her? 

User: You mean Jinx... she wants to stay. She’s practically his daughter. I’ll give her your regards. SON OF A BITCH! 

Caitlyn: Did someone say my name? 

User: NO, NO ONE DID! 

Caitlyn: Damn, well then, you get a bullet! 

User: Shit, shit, shit! 

Vi: I had her. She was right there. 

Caitlyn: Take it easy alright. I got you. 

Charlie: Take care of her Caitlyn, we need to get to the bottom of this. 

Vi: Don’t worry. Cupcakes got me. 

Caitlyn: She’s lost her mind! 

 

---

Midoria: Sorry guys, I had to calm mom down about the whole multiverse and US being nuked thing.  

Charlie: Right, I guess the whole world being blown up might cause some confusion. 

Midoriya: It’s more because my dad is working in America at the moment. So hearing that it got nuked freaked her out into thinking it was a surprise attack and dad was caught up in it. 

Charlie: Oh, your dad works in another country. What’s he like? 

Vaggie: Charlie, honey, I don’t think you should- 

Midoriya: Um, well, the thing is... I’m not exactly sure. 

Luffy: Wassup? 

Midoriya: Honestly, it's been years since I last saw him. He works to earn a living, and I can’t remember the last time he came to visit, called us, I don’t even remember his face. We don’t even have pictures of him.  

Charlie: I suppose I can relate. 

Midoriya: You can... I mean, even with, you know... Satan as your dad. 

Charlie: WOAH...woah there. I love Satan, he always dotes on me, he would lift me on his shoulders when I was small, and I could see the cosmos shimmer around me... but he’s not my dad. That’s... sigh, Lucifer... 

Midoriya: Oh, I’m sorry. This might seem a bit loaded but is he... was he...? 

Charlie: Oh no, not abusive or anything like that. But he sort of got a bit distant after my... my mom went away. About... seven years now. But y’know. 

Vi: Losing a mom sucks. Same with a dad. The fact that he’s alive and spineless kind of puts a dent in my mental image of the devil. 

Luffy: Man, you guys are lucky. I wish I had a dad. Or a mom. But I guess Dadan counted. Definitely better than my grandpa.  

Vi: You don’t care that they weren’t in your life? 

Nami: It drains every bit of you to hold onto those memories. Honestly, this is the most I’ve agreed with him this whole time. 

Vi: Well maybe you can write them off but can you say the same when you stare down at their bloody corpse. 

Nami: Go to hell. 

Nami has logged off. 

Midoriya: That was pretty harsh there VI. 

Vi: What are you, my conscience? Get off my back until you can tell me to forget the face of my mother or my... my father. 

Luffy: I guess I never thought about what having a dad is like. I guess it must be nice. And a mom. You guys are pretty lucky to have them when you did. 

Midoriya: Luffy, time and a place. 

Luffy: I’m just saying. It’s nice to have something you remember or even someone there now, even if you don’t have it anymore. Like this boat, I had a boat but now I have this much better one. Thanks Nami. 

Nami has logged back in 

Nami: ...no problem. Thanks for... thanks. 

User 9: Have you finished talking yet because I’m trying to sleep. 

Nami: I’m sorry, is our escape from marine forces getting in the way of your nap time? 

User 9: Don’t you have a safe to crack? 

Nami: If I could lift this damn thing, I’d crack your head open. 

User 9: Yeah, well, you can’t. Maybe pay me some Berrie if you want me to take care of that for you. 

Nami has logged off 

Luffy: Looks like the crew is coming together. 

Midoriya: Luffy... thank you. 

Luffy: For what? 

Midoriya: I don’t know, just, It’s nice to let that off my chest. I never realised how much I’ve been holding in about my dad not being there and what with All Might helping me recently, I just feel... it doesn’t matter. 

Charlie: I think Midoriya, this calls for an honest heart to heart with your mom. Don’t let something like that relationship go. I wish i could talk to my mom and hear what she has to say. 

Midoriya: Do you have something you want to say? 

Charlie: Nah... I’ll be able to say it when I see her again. 

Vi: Might be important to say what you need to say to the one who’s closest. Maybe he needs to hear it. 

Midoriya: you’ve been surprisingly insightful about this whole situation Vi. 

Vi: Since when did you get snarky? 

Midoriya: Since Lucy isn’t here to do it. 

Vi: Well, when you bleed out from a gut wound you begin to hallucinate a lot of things. Like the fact that my sister is with the man who killed my father. 

User 10: Oh, wow that’s ten pounds of trauma in a five-pound bag. 

Charlie: Angel, butt out, this is sensitive. 

User 10 name changed to Angel 

Midoriya: Damn, I wish I could help somehow. This whole thing feels like a torture device, we can listen in on your problems, but we can’t help at all. 

Vi: Eh, you're helping, at least a little bit. It helps to listen to this whole thing and raise my spirits. 

Lucy logged in 

Lucy: Guys. I just cut off a guys head. 

Caitlyn just logged in. 

Caitlyn: Vi I’m back, I think this will help- UGH, good lord its everywhere! Hold on, I’ll get a bucket and hold your hair back. 

Notes:

Thanks for the comments guys. This guy is really building up steam. But as you can tell, action will not be the forefront nor is it my forte. We might be looking at some time discrepancy here and there, to get the plot moving.

Chapter 5: Now we're asking serious questions

Summary:

As the group gets to know each other better, time to start asking some real hard-hitting questions.

Luffy: Hey guys, turns out we can take pictures with this thing. Check it out.

 

Luffy has uploaded a picture.

 

Vi: Yeah, I-cough cough-know, urgh that bitch caught me off guard, you all saw it.

 

Lucy: Saw and saved... OK that’s too mean, I didn’t actually save it.

 

Vi: Don’t know how?

 

Lucy: NO! I’m just not used to this new software... that’s all.

 

Charlie: Luffy why are you growling at the camera?

 

Luffy: practicing for my bounty poster. Oh, what about this one?

 

Midoriya: You are the only person I know who would want to be on a wanted poster.

 

Luffy: Not a fan? How about this one?

 

Lucy: ooh yeah, go with that one, nice big smile.

 

Charlie: Don’t encourage criminal behavior. But yes, that last one is much more appealing.

 

Vi: Yeah Lucy, he needs encouragement like you need a head in a bag.

 

Lucy: Y’know, I thought for sure out of everything that’s been posted here, that would be what endeared me to you.

 

VI: You think I’m some kind of head collector? What part of any of that would make you think I was into decapitation.

 

Lucy: The dismemberment part, I guess.

 

Charlie: You know, all this talk of interpretation and miscommunication goes perfectly with this new photography feature.

 

Midoriya: Why… Charlie, I’m not so sure you should be diagnosing your friends as a licensed therapist. THERAPIST, Luffy.

 

Charlie: Don’t worry, I’m not a licensed therapist.

 

Lucy: That’s even more unethical.

 

Vi: So what’s the diagnosis today doc, staring at the ink blots?

 

Charlie: Look here and tell me what you see.

 

Vi: Fuck sake, I was kidding!

 

Charlie: Guys come on. I’m trying to take on what you’re saying and use more legitimate treatment options. If I want sinners to be redeemed, I’m going to need to take their treatment super seriously.

 

Vi: ugh, fine, I see… a dead elephant.

 

Midoriya: How do you even…

 

Nami: She’s being facetious, Midoriya.

 

Luffy: Wait, I thought Lucy was.

 

Charlie: That’s fascist Luffy.

 

Lucy: and NO IM NOT!

 

Luffy: What is fascist anyway?

 

Zoro: You know the world Government?

 

Luffy: Yeah?

 

Zoro: That.

 

Luffy: …oh, I know all about that.

 

Nami: Well that’s a good thing considering you live in it.

 

Charlie: Anyway, Lucy, your turn.

 

Lucy: uuummm… two bears high fiving?

 

Vi: wow for real?

 

Midoriya: Say guys, can I send this on to you? Since we have the photo option, I’d like for you to see my progress. I mean, I can’t tell anyone else, plus it’s not heroic if I boast about my achievements-

 

Vi: DUDE BREATHE. If you want to show us, then just do it.

 

Charlie: Absolutely, Midoriya, pride may cometh before the fall, believe me I know, but give yourself space to take pride in your progress. OOOOH, I should use that. Positive reinforcement with self-reflection, YES!

 

Lucy: We still haven’t forgotten the ethical ramifications of you being a practicing counselor without a license.

 

Vaggie: And you are forgetting the fact that this is HELL. Where are we going to find an uncompromised therapist in Hell... at least one that hasn’t slept with their patients?

 

Midoriya: Gah!

 

Caitlyn: All right, calm down. Don’t blow a gasket about sex. I’m surprised you didn’t faint when we mentioned the brothel.

Midoriya: Changing the subject... here is what I’ve been working on.

 

Midoriya has uploaded an image.

 

Vi: ...It’s a clean beach. Well, I guess it’s nice to finally see a beach that isn’t green and seeping oil but I don’t get-

 

Midoriya has uploaded an image

 

Vi: Shut my mouth, that’s what it used to look like? Shit dude, get over here and fix up the Lanes beaches, all we have are docks.

 

Lucy: Mine next, if you can somehow remove entire ships and dig up any mirelurks, you’d be a godsend.

 

Midoriya: Mirelurks?

 

Lucy has uploaded an image

 

Vi: Woah, what the FUCK!

 

Luffy: That looks delicious.

 

Lucy: No. Luffy don’t. It’s radioactive.

 

Luffy: Nami, do you think we can fish one of these guys?

 

Nami: What are you – WHAT THE F- whoever this is, I don’t want to think about what you’re living through.

 

Zoro: Looks like something out of the Grand Line.

 

Nami: Oh really, you know all about the animals in the place you’ve never been to.

 

Midoriya: ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM

 

Vi: What was THAT?

 

Midoriya: Whenever we overlook a major topic for conversation, one of us should shout out loud that we are ignoring the elephant in the room.

 

Lucy: What’s an elephant?

 

Nami: Why not ask our resident animal expert here?

 

Zoro: Shut up, I’m sleepy.

 

Charlie: No offence intended but I was almost expecting Luffy to ask that.

 

Luffy: I know what they are. I used to beat those guys up for sport.

 

Zoro: Now that is some proper training.

 

Nami: Hey, you didn’t eat them, did you?

 

Luffy: Tried to once but Ace told me not to. Said the meat was too stringy and eating the trunk does not work like a noodle.

 

Charlie: Anyway, circling back to Midoriya, let’s not ignore the obvious, Luffy, please introduce us to your new friends.

 

Midoriya: No, I meant we need to talk about your lack of qualifications-

 

Luffy: I met Zoro and Nami at the Marine base. Great fighters and they’ve become part of my crew.

 

Nami: Again, we’re not a crew. Zoro, wake up and participate!

 

Zoro: what even is this thing? It’s a Den Den Mushi with a screen and it takes multiple calls.

Luffy: Plus these baby mushi’s so we can put them in our ears and keep in touch. See, Nami already has one.

 

Nami: No… I took one of the extra ones you have, that’s all, drop it.

 

Zoro: Why even have that thing, did your mom give you one to call home?

 

Nami: And what’s wrong with that, huh?

 

Charlie: And I’m not his mom. We just came across this device sitting in our homes one day and decided to use it.

 

Midoriya: Honestly, the more I say all this out loud, the more irresponsible it sounds.

 

Nami: Right now I’m more focused on opening this safe, but all your talking is incredibly distracting.

 

Luffy: Yeah, Nami is the best thief I know, we stole this safe right out from under the Axe Hand guys' nose.

 

Lucy: You stole from the Marines, what did they have that was so important?

 

Luffy: I just said, the safe.

 

Vi: The literal safe, you ripped it out of the wall and ran with the safe.

 

Caitlyn: Ok that’s a new one for me. Good Lord, do I have to make a lot of that as a potential burglary threat someone would be stupid enough to pull off?

 

Vi: Sounds pretty baller to me.

 

Luffy: It was the most efficient way to do it.

 

Nami: But hardly the most elegant. If Zoro wasn’t there to carry it, I might have had to leave it behind. I would have opened it without getting caught.

 

Charlie: Not sure if burgling and stealing are the best ways to live your life.

 

Nami: What do you know about it!?

 

Vi: Yeah, butt out of things you don’t understand, ugh damn that shit hurts, you’ve never had to steal the cuttings from a butcher cutting board just to get some protein growing up.

 

Caitlyn: Well you’ve never had to stare into the crying eyes of a student as they lose their life savings because someone wanted an extra dose of shimmer to feel good. Also, don’t tear your stitches, I only know rudimentary first aid, enough to last you until we get to Piltover.

 

Midoriya: I feel like I’m about to step on a non-negotiable landmine if I start getting involved.

 

Charlie: You’re going to have to if you want to be a hero like you always talk about. What kind of hero buries their head in the sand?

 

Lucy: Exactly, you need to stand up for your beliefs. Like the golden rule. If I abide by that, I know it can impact some small amount of change every time I do it.

 

Luffy: Golden rule… I think Makino said something about that… whenever I got in trouble with the mayor, she always told me to remember the golden rule… what was it?

 

Nami: Wait what are you five, you still follow that rule?

 

Vi: Dear God, are you seriously saying-

 

Charlie: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

 

Midoriya: Wait, you know the Bible?

 

Charlie: I’m the daughter of a fallen angel, how could I not read the Bible? Dad kind of ruined it though. Started when I was young, and my dad just walks behind shouting “SPOILERS! Jesus dies in the end!”

Midoriya: Fact is guys, I am training to be a hero, to be an upstanding symbol of justice. I can’t do that if I’m wishy-washy about my beliefs but you guys are the first friends I’ve had in a long while, so I don’t want to insult you.

 

Vaggie: We’re all adults here, mentally maybe not all of us, but we can take a little criticism.

 

Charlie: Yes, yes, exactly that Vaggie! You are much better at this than you think you are. OK everyone, let’s all weigh in on our stance on theft. This is a safe space, we don’t think ill of one another, just the choices we made in the past.

 

Vi: Stealing is awesome, next.

 

Lucy: I wouldn’t loot anyone. I just can’t bring myself to make someone, especially someone in this wasteland, suffer and die because I need water.

 

Nami: Good luck with keeping those morals when you’ve been pushed to necessity like some of us have.

 

Luffy: I plan to pay back anything I’ve been given with my treasure tab. It all evens out in the end.

 

Zoro: Someone steals from me, expect me to steal it right back. With a little interest.

 

Midoriya: I’ve never had to steal out of necessity. I’ve never been given something I didn’t work hard for. I don’t think I’ve met someone who’s stolen to survive. I can’t begin to imagine what drives someone to do that. The law is straightforward, if I’m sent after someone who is convicted of theft, then I will chase them. But I will never think less of them or any of you for doing what you need to survive.

 

Charlie: Exactly, this is a zone of trust. Lucy, we will not condemn you for killing a man to save your father. Vi, we will not condemn you for being in prison for reasons I’m sure are your own. Luffy, we won’t judge you for choosing to be a pirate, especially when you want to prove you’re going to be a different pirate.

 

Vi: And Midoriya, we won’t condemn you for grandstanding over the rest of us for choosing a career where you crack down on struggling civilians just trying to make a living.

 

Lucy: Hey, I did not kill anyone, he was dying and asked me to take his head as a sacrificial offering to convince the people who took my dad to give him back.

 

Nami: And I absolutely hate the fact I’m sailing with a pirate. I hate them, all of them.

 

Vi: And you have no idea what I’ve been through while in prison. Why I had to get out, why I had to do my own thing, even if I had to get shanked.

 

Charlie: Oh wow, that escalated far faster than I expected, um, OK, what I meant by that was-

 

Angel Dust: And Charlie, we won’t condemn you for starting some cockamamie fantasy to save a buncha folks souls just so you can feel better about you not doing anything about your issues.

 

Vaggie: Yo Angel, what the fuck!?

 

User ??: Now this some quality entertainment I signed up for. Please Charlie dear, do go on.

 

Charlie: Fine! You want to throw stones. I miss my mom! I miss my father not being there to fill the void. I miss being active in hell. I miss my aunts and uncles who’ve ghosted me because of my cockamamie plan. I hate that I can’t fix people’s problems and save my hotel idea from being condemned by the angels, and it’s making me super stressed!

 

Vaggie: CHARLIE! It’s OK, I’m sorry you’re feeling stressed but that’s why I’m here. To help you. So please, don’t bottle up like that anymore. Alright?

 

Charlie: Sorry guys. But it surprisingly felt good to get that off my chest. This chat is surprisingly liberating. I mean, think about it, we are probably never going to meet each other or other people in our respective universes

Lucy: So feel free to vent our frustrations because no one will know.

 

Caitlyn: It feels like shouting into the void, except the void answers back with helpful life advice.

 

Vi: I can’t do it. It still feels too much like I’m in an interrogation. I can’t confess to this, not even to myself. I shouldn’t… I shouldn’t have left you.

 

Lucy: I resent my vault. I hate that they won’t do anything and have forced me up here. I hate the wasteland. It’s dry, dusty and burns my skin every day. But by God this is the most free I have ever felt since we were raided. I held a man at gunpoint, and I felt a rush of adrenaline telling him to stand down. I escorted a man across the plains and then took his head. I stuffed a tracker up his nose and now I feel like I own it. This power, it’s making me feel… powerful. Norm can never find out.

 

Caitlyn: Vi, if not me, you can trust them. Just like I said… you’ve got a good heart. I read the file, trumped up charges by Sheriff Marcus to keep you hidden in Stillwater. Vi…vi… VI! Everyone, I need to take a moment. Vi is not recovering well and… someone’s outside.

 

Charlie: Damn, we were making such good progress! And we still can’t help. It’s not like we can do anything other than watch and listen.

 

Midoriya: Well, I’m too motivated to second guess myself. And I have faith that Vi will make it out. Caitlyn has her back, the two of you will be fine. Barricade yourselves and make your escape as quietly as you can.

 

Caitlyn: I wish I had your confidence.

 

Midoriya: I have none. I just know when someone needs to be saved, then you do it with all you have. So what do you have to save Vi?

 

Caitlyn: I have… I have… I have a back hatch, we can climb up the way we came. We just need to barricade… huh, I guess Vi was still conscious.

 

Vi: What can I say, corniness is my weakness. Gotta say Midoriya, you got me pumped up. You sure you can be hero without a quirk because I think people in your world need a wakeup call.

 

Midoriya: I will be. Because… because I am being trained by the world’s greatest hero and tomorrow, I will be inheriting his quirk.

 

Luffy: And I… I don’t know if I have anything to confess.

 

Vi: Nah, you’re pretty straightforward all things considered.

 

Luffy: Then I will be king of the pirates with my loyal crew by my side and I will stand with them in everything we do together.

 

Nami:…Well then, I… have finally opened this damn safe. With a map to the grand line, I guess the future pirate king will be on his journey soon.

 

Charlie: Five.

 

Luffy: Huh!?

 

Zoro: Hey guys, are we supposed to be keeping an eye out for dangers.

 

Nami: Yes, the two of you are!

 

Zoro just uploaded an image

 

Zoro: Does this count?

 

Nami: Holy hell!

 

Charlie: I resent that remark.

 

Lucy: Is that a flare detonating? How did you miss that ship?

 

Luffy: I was distracted by Midoriya saying something about inheriting power. How does someone inherit power?

 

Midoriya: Let me explain.

Notes:

Hey, so, long time.

I am so sorry for leaving you guys twisting in the wind for so long. I normally never leave a story untouched for this long. I try to upload only if I have the next chapter nearly finished.

As it stands, my time was taken up by another project I was asked to help out with, in fact I would have been out with this chapter faster if they hadn't decided to message me and ask me to completely change the project because they forgot to check the legal minutia.

I'll try to get the next chapter out within a week to make up for being late. Thanks to all of you who left comments of concern. I am well, thank you all. But I'm glad we're getting traction

Chapter 6: Now we're raring for our fights

Summary:

The big fights to determine our characters futures are setting up. Will their true character be revealed or will they show new colours?

Midoriya: OK, so, I’m going to receive a quirk from someone else, that person is one of the most famous people on the planet whose quirk has been speculated about for years. But this is a major secret that for some reason keeps slipping out when I talk to you guys.  

 

Vaggie: Makes sense. Like that other chica said, shouting into the void and this time it answers back.   

 

Luffy: And how do you inherit powers?  

 

Midoriya: Weren’t you being attacked?  

 

Luffy: Oh we are but I had to know how your going to get special abilities before I get knocked out, oh there we go...  

 

Charlie: And Luffy is now knocked out. Sound off, Luffy crew, anyone still conscious?  

 

Angel: Pretty sure if anyone was going to be the last to be zonked out it’s monkey boy.  

 

Lucy: Hold up, an angel! Woah, amazing, I can’t believe an angel is part of our little pow-wow. I have so many questions, especially about some of my more recent transgressions.  

 

Vaggie: pfft...HAHAHAHAHA  

 

Lucy: Did I miss something, what’s happening?  

 

Charlie: Umm, yeah, Angel isn’t an angel in the traditional sense. He’s one of the sinners who’s joined my hotel plan. His first name just happens to be Angel.  

 

Angel: The hell do you mean traditional sense? What other way could it make sense?  

 

Charlie: Because you're our precious angel, Angel. Thank you for joining us here.  

 

Angel: Wuff, take it down a notch, you ain’t my mother.  

 

Vaggie: I can see you blushing.  

 

Angel: And I can see you smirking, wipe it off your face. You’re already short an eye, smirking makes you look lopsided.  

 

Midoriya: Hey, lay off her. Don’t make fun of someone's affliction.  

 

Angel: Shove it curly, I’m getting a drink.  

 

Vaggie: Ugh, why did we let Alastor install that bar? Midoriya, thanks but there’s no need to jump to my defense. This is more like play fighting.   

 

Midoriya: Sorry, I don’t mean to... to umm-  

 

Vaggie: White Knight?  

 

Midoriya: Yeah that. Honestly, I just hate the fact that someone can be mocked for something outside of their control.   

 

Charlie: Like quirklessness?  

 

Lucy: What did we say about psychoanalyzing our friends?  

 

Charlie: No seriously, Midoriya, it’s clear you're linking whatever hurt you went through with the hurt others go through. Pure empathy is difficult to come by down here. For you, you put yourself in Vaggie’s shoes and stood up for your hypothetical self.  

 

Lucy: I think your psychobabble is probably getting a bit out of control.  

Charlie: It means there is a root cause to what you’re feeling  and it affects how you act.   

 

Midoirya: Such as why I’m the only one freaking out that Luffy and his friends are at risk right now.  

 

Angel: Exactly.  

 

Vaggie: But that also means you need to show some faith. Just look at me, I put faith in Charlie because I know her belief is carried by her conviction. She’s going to exhaust herself before giving up on the hotel.   

 

Lucy: Heck, you technically put faith in us. Telling us about your quirkless nature and how you are involved in some grand conspiracy.  

 

Midoriya: I wouldn’t call it a conspiracy.  

 

Mrs Midoriya: No honey, that’s definitely a conspiracy.  

 

Midoriya: Mom! How long have you been eavesdropping?   

 

Mrs Midoriya: Trust but verify.  

 

Lucy: Oh, I get it.  

 

Charlie: I don’t.  

 

Caitlyn: Bureaucratic term for keeping your friends close but your enemies closer.  

 

Lucy: I thought it was a Soviet term?  

 

Mrs Midoriya: Not at all. Just be careful with your trust.  

 

Vaggie: What I meant was, you have faith that we are good people and shared a secret you believe will encourage our trust in you. But yeah, maybe don’t go spreading that around.  

 

Angel: Too late, I’ve spread myself all over town!  

 

Vaggie: Angel gross.  

 

Mrs Midoriya: Mr Angel, that is disgusting.  

 

Angel: What am I surrounded by moms today?  

 

Midoriya: To be fair, that was mostly based on the fact this is a multiverse chat and none of you can spill the secret elsewhere and ruin All Might's life.  

 

Lucy: Is there something that’s really got you goat?  

 

Midoriya: It just feels like I’ve betrayed his trust after he made me promise not to tell anyone and this is a huge opportunity for me.  

 

Lucy: I guess for us, the concept doesn’t sound nearly as taboo.  

 

Charlie: I mean, in Hell sinners do it all the time. That’s how folks like Alastor crop up in hell with the rest of the Overlords, souls in exchange for power and protection.  

 

Caitlyn: Recent advancements into Hextech are pretty much granting us powers thought only to belong in the realms of the arcane. That or Shimmer to give the desperate a boost. People who feel abandoned, afraid, lost in the world.  

 

User ??: You buying or what?  

 

Caitlyn: Yes, OK, here in exchange. A bargain. Sorry guys but I need to gather evidence.  

 

Lucy: Fact is, we just don’t care if you have a taboo like that in your world, we will never know that struggle or that hate.  

 

Midoriya: Kind of like how we will never understand your hate of Asians.  

 

Lucy: Hey, I was comforting you!  

 

Midoriya: Someone has to keep up Vi’s end of the argument while she’s suffering.  

 

Vaggie: Eyyyy  

 

Angel: Eyyy, I’m liking him better and better.  

 

Midoriya: I guess to answer your question, I’m feeling anxious about tomorrow, which at this point is only four hours away, not to mention my entrance exam straight after but the knowledge that I’m going to be given a power by our worlds current greatest hero. My nerves are pretty shot.  

 

Mrs Midoriya: Wait, you're finished. You're getting your quirk tomorrow?  

 

Charlie: Well, this should be a celebration. Don’t be so down in the dumps Midoriya, be proud of your accomplishments.  

 

Vaggie: Valiant effort put into a job well done. I wish more people here believed in that.  

 

Angel: I can still hear you bitch!  

 

Vaggie: GOOD, because you were supposed to!  

 

Mrs Midoriya: Just a thought, you keep calling him All Might. Doesn’t he have a proper name?  

 

Midoriya: ...you know, I never did find the courage to ask him that.  

 

Mrs Midoriya: Your about to receive the most fundamental aspect of his being into your life, why would not at least ask his name?  

 

Midoriya: There’s still too much of a separation with us. Yes, he’s training me and yes, he’s giving me the opportunity to have a quirk, but it’s all based on academics and career prospects. There needs to be a level of professional separation between us for this to work efficiently.  

 

Vi: Way to make getting superpowers feel like school.   

 

Lucy: It’s a school for heroes and heroics. That bumps up the fun factor a little bit doesn’t it?  

Vi: Wouldn’t know. I never went to school. We were taught to read and write by my… by Vander. Maths and being able to hold a conversation with people that actually got you something. And I turned out ok.  

 

Caitlyn: I literally pulled you out of prison less then twenty-four hours ago.  

 

Vi: Do you honestly think I could’ve argued my way out of a summary judgment by a corrupt sheriff if I had a law degree?  

 

Caitlyn: Point. But look at the rest of us. Circumstances just seemed to push you into being the outlier to the norm and not a trend.  

 

Lucy: I mean, we received formal Vault Tec SATs and Ivy League programs presented by Nika Cola but that was so we understood all aspects of Vault life and ensure even if we all died, the last survivor would know how to do everything.  

 

Mrs Midoriya: That’s horribly pessimistic. And just downright sad. You have no prospects beyond living in a vault.  

 

Lucy: we’re farmers, technically, growing and harvesting maize. Everything else is plumbing and electronics for maintenance of water and heat, security detail to stop raiders from robbing us and education so we can learn how it all works.  

 

Midoriya: it’s a perpetual Sisyphean wheel of cranking out the same people over and over again until you, what, eventually leave. Did you ever know when ypthat was going to happen?  

 

Lucy: Sure… about another generation pending the success of our non-genetically linked relationship produced progeny. But we were told since birth we are the candle of civilisation and-and-and…  

 

Vi: Keep going, I incest.  

 

Lucy: THAT WAS JUST PRACTICE! We are way more pragmatic, and I think you give us too little credit for trying to restart society after nuclear Armageddon.  

 

Caitlyn: Ok bad example, Princess Morningstar, please tell us your educational experience. Please.  

 

Charlie: Oh please, call me Charlie, no need to stand on formality.  

 

Vi: Too bad, that’s practically Cupcakes whole schooling.  

 

Caitlyn: Hush. It’s called etiquette.  

 

Charlie: But yeah, no, as the offspring of primordial beings I’m pretty much an evolving entity fully formed from the womb.  

 

Angel: Wait, what?  

 

Vaggie: Fundamentally, angels are not exactly organic, at least they don’t follow the rules of terrestrial biology. You either emerge as a fully formed humanoid with all the basic knowledge and wisdom found in someone of that age. Experience helps them on from there to grow as a person.  

 

Angel: Holy shit, did Charlie pop out her moms cooch the size of a six foot lamppost?  

 

Charlie: Ew gross, don’t talk about my moms vagina like that. And lamppost?  

 

Vaggie: A very sexy lamppost honey. Also Angel, fuck off. No, celestial beings have the choice to procreate and grow progeny more naturally. Most don’t because they don’t have the patience for babies or kids.  

 

Charlie: I can guess which ones my parents turned out to be.  

 

Mrs Midoriya: Oh dear, patience is a virtue not many holy people have. No don’t should exist in your heart that they didn’t want you. But time changes things.  

 

Caitlyn: I feel like we’ve diverted.  

 

Charlie: Right, yes, well, actually my schooling was more performative. I was more going through the motions of elementary, middle and high school while being tutored by my mom and dad. It was more about emotional development and social practice than actually learning. Not to mention, most teachers and lecturers who end up in hell tended to be podophilic perverts or emotionally unstable shooters.  

 

Vi: That’s 0 for 2 there cupcake.  

 

Caitlyn: …Luffy do I dare ask…  

 

Luffy has logged in 

 

Luffy: I was raised in a forest by mountain bandits.  

 

Caitlyn: Of course.  

 

Luffy: Ace and Sabo taught me everything about hunting, camping, building and fighting. Makino taught me how to say please and thank you.  

 

Mrs Midoriya: What about your mother and father?  

 

Luffy: I never found out what happened to my dad, nobody likes to talk about him. And for my mom, I think Gramps said something about a crocodile eating her. Or she ran off with a crocodile. Or she trains crocodiles. I never really saw either of them growing up.  

 

Caitlyn: Good Lord this is whole thing is a shit show. Apologies Mrs Midoriya for the swears.  

 

Charlie: Sorry Mam.  

 

Angel: Yeah sorry Mrs M.  

 

Charlie: Gasp, you freely apologized. Guys it’s working!  

 

Angel: Alright, calm down.  

 

Midoriya: Y’know guys, we’ve been chatting for hours at this stage and I need to head out for my final stretch.   

Mrs Midoriya: Are you ready for this? After you go through with this, your whole life is going to change. You’ll be hounded by press and journalists; people’s lives will be at stake but most importantly so will yours.  

 

Midoriya: No hesitation. That’s what he liked about me. All Might has poured hours into me so that I can reach my goal and become a hero. I’m not going to faceplant in the final hurdle. I’m going to UA and I will become the worlds greatest superhero.  

 

Angel: Go big or go home I guess.  

 

Vi: That’s the shit I’m talking about. Alright, you’re not going to show me up. Cupcake, let’s kick this into overdrive and get the hell out of here. Out there is someone I need to see. Someone I’ve neglected for so long and I will not let her down again. She needs a hero.  

 

Caitlyn: You are in no condition to fight much less move. You don’t have to do this out of misplaced pride you know.  

 

Vi: It’s like you said. I’m a good person. Seeing Midoriya, I kinda want to remember what that feels like.  

 

Caitlyn: I’ll go with you. Even with that shimmer in your system, recovery for you is going to be slow until you reach back to one hundred percent.  

 

Vi: Aren’t you a peach.  

 

Caitlyn: I thought I was a cupcake.  

 

Nami: Ugh my head, where are we?  

 

Luffy: Nami, you’re awake!  

 

Midoriya: Nami, where are you right now? Is your head alright? What happened to all of you, last we saw you were hit by some kind of red flare and smoke was everywhere?  

 

Nami: Please stop talking, my head is still spinning.  

 

Zoro: Looks like we’re in a box. Not sure if we were shipped here or if they built it specifically to hold us but I should be able to... WHERE ARE MY SWORDS!  

 

Nami: Forget them, where is the Grand Line map?  

 

Luffy: Forget that, where is my hat?  

 

Mrs Midoriya: Luffy, honey, you’re wearing it.  

 

Luffy: Oh good, they didn’t take it.  

 

Nami: Like that’s a priority right now. Who knows who took us.  

 

Luffy: Don’t worry, they’re pirates.  

 

Midoriya: OK now I’m worried.  

 

Nami: You and me both.  

 

Vi: Do you see any exit strategies? Peepholes, loose nails, loose panels, something to cut your bindings with?  

 

Zoro: We’re not bound.  

 

Caitlyn: Wait what? Why aren’t you tied up? As soon as they open the box you could ambush them. What idiot is running this kidnapping job?  

 

Lucy: You’re pretty anxious to see this kidnapping carried out properly.  

 

Caitlyn: It’s the principle of the thing. How can I respect lacklustre criminals, especially when they get the drop on our friends?  

 

Lucy: Awww.  

 

Vi: Yo Cait, I think we’re in our own bind right now, pretty sure someone followed you.  

 

Caitlyn: Why, I only took some photos, who would be following me.  

Vi: Because we don’t belong in this void where Silco throws away his trash.  

 

User ??: Hello Violet, shall we have a chat?  

 

Vi: SILCO!  

 

Luffy: Hey guys, we got captured by a pirate circus! Awesome!  

 

Silco: ...did your pocket just say pirate circus?  

 

Vi: Ignore it, my gadget thing talks a lot.  

 

Silco: Is Stillwater still a prison or was it converted to a psychiatric unit recently?  

 

Vi: Dammit Luffy you ruined the whole vibe!  

Chapter 7: We all stand together

Summary:

Wuff, everyone's having a rough time in here. And it's only going to get that much wilder and grim. Midoriya's struggling with his UA exam. Lucy's being stalked. Vi is within spitting distance of her little sister. Luffy has to talk to clowns. And Charlie has a to talk to another group of clowns.

Notes:

This one was a haul to get through. A blend of both chat log and prose. So again, sorry for taking ages on this one. Burn out is a killer, especially when you're sitting in front of a computer screaming at your brain to "Please write something". And then your brain screams back, "No, play Atomfall instead".

Also, shoutout to Hypn0s. Just a heads up, I'm not going to copy Izuthulu but the reference was too tempting. Now, do tell me if this style is too flowery or long or if the prose is even necessary. I just wanted to get some development behind the people beyond being voices in a chat.

Chapter 7  

 

Vi: Listen Silco, I don’t have time to explain shit and kick your ass, so lets cut to the chase. Where’s my sister? 

 

Silco: Your sister? 

 

Vi: Powder. 

 

Silco: Jinx. 

 

Angel: Are we snorting something over here?  

 

Silco: I beg your pardon?  

 

Angel: Oh wait, you said Jinx. So Vi is snorting and you got a sweet little something at the joint, is Jinx your sweetheart? 

 

Silco: Violet, I will give you a ten second head start to put as much distance between me and that infernal contraption before I turn your body into stew. 

Vi: Normally I wouldn’t be one to run from a fight but this has gotten so awkward I’m really appreciating it at the moment. Catch you on the fuck-side flipper. 

 

Silco: That’s not the phrase. 

 

Vi: Too late, I’m far away. Cait, kick out the support beam. 

 

Silco: I’m letting you go thatsnotnecessary- HOLY SHIT DUCK! 

 

Cait: Kind of overkill wouldn’t you say. 

 

Vi: I saw him reaching. Plus he had goons with him, shimmer addicts, they’re like animals and will tear into us without Silco telling them to. How did he even find us? 

 

Lucy: I’m guessing you did something to attract their attention earlier Caitlyn. Something about taking photos as evidence? 

 

Vi: GODDAMMIT! We need to go now! If Silco still has Powder, then she must be in the Underground somewhere. I still have contacts I can reach out to. But for the rest of you, don’t interrupt my reunion with her with whatever inane bullshit your involved in. 

 

User: Stop! Stop, this is all wrong! Where is the spotlight for my entrance and where oh where is the dancing lion? 

 

Luffy: Hey guys, I just met Burpy the clown, he’s a big deal pirate around here. 

 

User name changed to Burpy  

 

Burpy: Hold up, no, let’s nip that in the bud. It’s Buggy, the genius jester, the homicidal clown, future king of the pirates. 

 

User name changed to Buggy  

 

Luffy: That can’t be right, because I’m going to be king of the pirates. 

 

Charlie: Oh wow, seven. 

 

Luffy: That’s a lot of titles, I bet everyone in the East Blue knows who you are. 

 

Buggy: ...What did you say? 

 

Luffy: Just that everyone knows who you are thanks to your wanted- 

 

Buggy: NOSE! 

 

Lucy: Wait, that’s what you’re angry about. 

 

Luffy: I mean have you seen it, it doesn’t look real. 

 

Buggy: No touchy! 

 

Vi Pretty sure you are the only touchy one here. 

 

Buggy: OK, who keeps talking while I’m monologuing? I swear it’s like your hat is talking. 

 

Luffy: Oh that’s because of the Den Den Mushii in there.  

 

Nami: Wait, you brought it with you!? Why? 

 

Luffy: I thought it might be lonely. 

 

Nami: You can’t even call for help on that thing. 

 

Zoro: We don’t need help. Because we’re going to take down every single clown we see. 

 

Buggy: Good luck with that. Your surrounded by my freaks and you guys have only got one sword between the three of you. 

 

Zoro: No one touches my swords. 

 

Midoriya: Wait what if they need one?  

 

Buggy: What even is that thing, do you have a call that’s just always on? 

 

Nami: Pretty special Den Den Mushi, all yours for the low price of letting us leave. 

 

Buggy: It is pretty tempting to have a snail and bring my show on the road. Does it do visual? 

 

Luffy: Hey, we can’t give Shelly away! 

 

Nami: Are you shitting me, you named it! Then maybe you can stay with him. Hey Buggy, how about a magic trick. 

 

Luffy: NAMI MY HAT! 

 

Buggy: Now that looks freaky. Welcome to the crew rubber boy. Freaks, get the girl and give them a quiet seat.  

---

Charlie 

Charlie: OK, signing off until I get this done. Good Lick with your exam Midoriya. Safe Journey Lucy. Please don’t die Luffy. Watch yourself out there Vi. 

 

Charlie has signed out  

 

“OK, I’m ready. Let’s do this thing.” Charlie said as she hopped from one foot to the other with buzzing anticipation. Vaggie stood next to her, bracing her down with hands on both shoulders. 
“Honey relax, You can’t show fear in there. So before we go in, I need to make sure you are sure.”  

“Yes, I’ve realized just how non-active I’ve been with the hotel. In perspective, I’m not using nearly as much resources that are available to me.” 

“But the Overlords are not exactly your underlings. Lower in the totem pole but not to be trifled with. I’m still keeping Alastor away with a six foot pole.” 

“Why my dear,” piped in Alastor, materializing from shadow behind the two of them, “I’m a little offended that after our negotiation you still trust me so little.” With him were the egg boii’s, the quartet having been ordered from the hotel by Vaggie. But it was with Alastor, whom they wanted to deal with the eggs, that they discovered he was invited to a committee of the Overlords. 

“The Overlords take charge of numerous souls and with the recent six month crunch, they are in as much danger to lose all their souls instead of losing a dozen.” Charlie coolly centred herself, before opening the doors to the meeting room of Carmine’s factory. 

Gathered around the table were various Overlords of middling to major power. Alastor decided to slide into a seat next to a wide beaming smile of a woman, sharpened teeth raring at the angel/princess duo. At the head of the table was Camilla Carmine, flanked by her daughters who eyes the spawn of Lucifer with reservation, Camilla being more composed and harder to read if only for a narrowing of her eyes. Next to her, Zestial sipped at a cup of tea not giving an inch of surprise.  

 “Greetings Overlords of Hell. Sorry for barging in but I feel this would be the perfect time for us to meet and plan for the upcoming Extermination.” Charlie announced to the quiet gathering of Overlords who slowly turned their heads to Carmilla. Her narrowed eyes intensified to a glare before she sighed imperceptibly. 

“This meeting will be called to order. Overlords of Hell, Your Highness.” She spoke without rush and the Overlords breathed a sigh of relief. As inputs of Extermination death tolls were passed around, Charlie sat at the opposite head of the table trying to look as small as possible. Suddenly, the doors behind her burst open with a kick as in walked Velvette phone in hand and eyes on the screen. 

 “Toodles luv, just got here, right, no, just a bunch of plonkers, that’s a- Val I have to call you back! The Princess is here. Tell Vox now!” She disconnected with a button press and leaned against the chair where Charlie sat. Vaggie growled an unspoken threat but Charlie raised a hand in warding off. “Oi, Princess you’re in my spot.” 

“Oh, sorry, just that, it was empty so I… all yours.” 

“Charle’s, come on don’t just… ugh, never mind.” Vaggie, frustrated but unwilling to start a brawl during a meeting, moved them next to Alastor. Smiling at their compliance, Velvette plopped herself in the vacant head seat. 

“Velvette, will the rest of your… compatriots be joining us?” Carmilla sneered. 

“Those windbags, who knows, might do especially since Miss Princess here decided to show.” Velvette side-eyed the two new members with thinly veiled greed. 

“Then knowing that Alastor is here, I’m guessing they’re staying as far away as possible.” Vaggie replied, much to the low chuckles of the assembled Overlords. Velvette's growls indicated that she didn’t seem to appreciate that. 

---

Vi  

Finally, in what seemed like divine intervention, a plume of blue vapor shot into the sky from the highest point in the underground. She knew for certain that it had to Powder, wielding the same flare from their youth. Another sign she was still there, her little Pow Pow. As she climbed the steps, she pondered her next move. How to convince a girl who by all accounts was working for the very man who was responsible for so many of her family's deaths. 

‘ By being the actual cause for their deaths. Silco gathered them but Powder pulled the trigger.’ She shook the intrusive thoughts away. For ten years she lived with them in isolation in her cell and no one to say otherwise except her hope. Caitlyn thought well of most people but if what she showed her in Stillwater meant anything, it was that she was looking for Powder for entirely different reasons, murder. It unnerved her how easily Powder slipped into that role when the information became clear. 

How she wished Vander was here to talk her down. She never had the patience for it but dammed if she wished she could retain more of his lectures and reproaches. If only so she could keep more of him with her. But she was on her own, she sped ahead of Caitlyn, who suspected the source of the flare is where she was headed. She felt shitty of course, she went through so much trouble to save her and now she ditches her once again. But she needed a voice of reason for this, it couldn’t be Cait’s but it definietly wasn’t hers. Then who? 

“Duh, of course.” 

 

Vi has logged in  

Vi: Mrs Midoriya. If you are there, please answer. I need a mother's voice. 

 

Lucy: Sorry Vi, but Midoriya took the device with him. Mrs Midoriya is still at home. 

 

Vi: Son of a bitch. I’m literally steps away from my sister who more than likely is a hair-trigger from blowing me the fuck up if I so much as say the wrong word. 

 

Lucy: Maybe I can help you. I’ll feed you lines to talk her down and maybe I can give some alternative perspective. 

 

Vi: What you mean like earlier when you talked down prune face and got that guys leg shot off. 

 

Lucy: I still have that video of you getting your ass kicked. Who was the one failing their words then? 

 

Vi: Fuck it, just do it. 

 

Here at the peak, she forgot about Lucy, she forgot about Cait and Silco and Shimmer. She only knew that Powder looked like she needed a hug. With bear-like strength, she wrapped arms around and hoisted up the waif like figure of her sister. 

“Pow-pow, I missed you so much. Let me look at you.” 

“Vi. Vi you’re here right. This time, you’re really here.” 

“Of course. I’m right here.” 

“But not always. You weren’t there. Not back then. Back then when in eeded you most. I need you now and you come but back then...” 

Lucy: OK Vi, clearly and calmly tell her where you were, don’t make excuses, right now, she needs to feel validated.  

Vi breathed in and began: “I was in Stillwater. Stupid decision back then to leave you and I got caught for it. For seven years, I thought of nothing but how I fucked up. And more than anything, I wanted to get out by any means, to see you, and say...” 

She looked up at Vi, eyes wide and hopeful, just like when they were kids. Vi brushed a strand of her incredibly long bangs out of the way and cupped her face. 

“I am so sorry.” Powder hugged her, returning the embrace with as much strength as she could. A surge of pride shot through her when she realized how strong Powder felt now. 

But like all moments, they must come to an end. 

“Jinx! Jinx is your sister?” Cait had caught up and was standing at the edge catching her breath. 

Seeing this, Jinx raised her gatling gun and took aim. “They kept saying you were with an enforcer. Is that what it took to get out, siding with enforcers, selling me out just so you can walk free?” 

“Powder no. Please, let’s just keep talking. We don’t need to fight.” 

“Vi, Jinx is a wanted suspect involved in terrorism. She killed four enforcers who were just doing their job and guarding a building.” 

“And enforcers are just doing their job when they smash in the faces of the people of Zaun.” 

“Cait, Powdr, this isn’t helping anything.” 

Lucy: OK Cait, I’m going to need you to ease off the throttle there. Powder is in a delicate state right now; we don’t need you doing your job right as they are at a heightened emotional state and are prone to violence.  

“Yeah, you heard the voice in my head, back off. Wait, you guys did hear that too, right?” 

Vi looked positively banjaxed at how chaotic this conversation was heading. “Yes, Powder, that wasn’t a voice in your head.” 

“You sure, it sounded like me.” 

“It does sound a little like her Vi.” 

Lucy: What, no way, it’s totally distinct from my voice.  

“No, Lucy, I can hear it now. That is uncanny.” 

“I know right. Sounds like my voice except if I lived with the Pilties above ground.” 

Lucy: Well, that just proves it, because I was raised underground by an elitist society. Wow, I have a lot of repressed feelings about those guys.”  

“You should express, it’s done wonder for me. “ 

“Yes Jinx, you look the poster child of mental stability.” 

At this, Vi popped in, “Woah, hey, none of that now. I get the whole crime angle but you don’t have to call out her mental like that.” 

Lucy: Yeah, leave my supposed doppelganger alone. Mental health is a serious issue. Side note, Vi, since when did start getting so sensitive to the meaning of words.  

“Ugh, Midoriya has been getting to me, talking about sensitivity training and how I should approach my sister and others to avoid fighting.” 

“Wait, and you listened to him? OK, the enforcer over there has got to be the only other person here because betweeen the voice and me seeing Vi everywhere, they must be in my head with the rest of the voices.” 

“I’m listening to him because he’s like Vander OK! I listened because it’s you on the line.” 

“Aww, you really are a good person. Reaching out for help, wearing the kids gloves, this hard candy has a frosting center.” 

“Frosting?” 

“Context Powder. Cupcake, please don’t say stuff like that in front of my sister.” 

Lucy: Oh wow, is she embarrassed?  

“Her face is red, she can’t even look at the Piltie.” 

Lucy: Thanks other me.  

“No problem Doppel-me.” 

“Ugh, now I know why you always annoyed me Lucy, deep down, I knew you were just my sister except even more unbearable.” 

---

Lucy  

Lucy: Midoriya, you got this. Don’t get in your own head and you will reach the tippy top. Can’t wait to read your first comic book when you make it big. Vi, you have this in hand, the rest is up to you. Take care of me. 

Lucy has logged off  

Lucy had decided to hoof it in the direction of her mission. On reflection, she felt she had dragged her feet out of fear, the environment proceeding to get more and more unpredictable, preforming her first mutilation on a corpse and being chased by who knows how many psychopaths seeking a head she had stuffed in a knapsack.  So when she finally came to a stop after jogging all night it was in an idyllic lake area with wildlife aplenty, not too different from the animated Nukaworld productions she grew up watching with her dad and Norm. She missed them both dearly and was determined to get through this so she could see them all together again as a big happy family like they were before. Who cares what some guy said about adapting and changing, he was in a sack, and she was carrying him. 

But being with the others certainly made the treck less tedious. She at least had someone to talk to. It was with this ease of mind she decided to relax and smell the roses. Afterall, what could go wrong with stopping to pet a deer do? 

At least that was what she thought before a creature decided to eat an innocent deer and make off with the head in the bag, her only bargaining chip. And even she was not desperate enough to jump headfirst into irradiated water to fight off a twelve-foot-long beast that probably weighed three Tonnes and would rip her arms off for toothpicks. So it was with both relief and fear that someone came along with the know-how to fix this problem. 

“Reach for the sky Vaultie. Don’t want you pulling your piece again, though I must admit, that tranq has got a good buzz running.” The Ghoul with a gun to her head gestured her to stand and back up.  

“Listen, I’ll comply or whatever you need but I have to get that head back. Something, it took it and...” 

He cast an eye around and looked satisfied with his deduction, “Gulper got it, huh?” He reared his pistol back and brought it smack against the side of her head, her vision blackened and then she was on the ground. 

---

Midoriya  

Midoriya: I sure hope Luffy, Nami and Zoro can get out of this. I’ll be back soon to check on you guys. Thanks for the well wishes Charlie, Lucy. 

Midoriya has logged off  

Midoriya was pumped, he was motivated, he was tripping and falling onto his face. So distracted by Bakugo’s gruff nature, he mis-stepped over his own feet and about to make an unfortunate first impression. He wished Toshinori was here for some additional support, having finally worked up the confidence to ask his name, Toshinori had apologized profusely for not trusting Midoriya more despite knowing each other for almost a year. But his fall was cut short by the gentle pat of an unknown young woman. 

 
“Hey, you okay?” she asked. His brain stalled as he awaited some form of feedback that would prompt the response function in his brain. “Man, this is all so exciting and scary isn’t it?” Still nothing. 

 

“Say something you moron!” chimed the communicator in his pocket. At the back of his mind, he set a reminder to put this on silent before he did the written exam. 

 

“Uhh, did you say something?” 

 

“Me, no, I didn’t say anything.” 

 

“I thought so, so that was your phone then?” 

 

“…dammit! Sorry, I was supposed to mute it but…” 

 

“But you dropped the ball with talking to this lady and now you look even more of a fool.”  

 

“Powder, will you please butt out of this.”  

 

“Why did you even show me this thing if you didn’t want me interacting with it?”  

 

“Wow, you have a very aggressive motivation app.” 

 

“Look, I’m sorry, I’m just trying to get my head on straight and now I’ve distracted you. I’ve been meaning to get better at this whole communication thing.” Izuku looked completely despondent as the stress continued to mount. 

“Hey, don’t stress it too much. We’re both going in to become heroes right. I’m super nervous too. Let’s head in together right. And not worry too much.” 

 

“Yeah, don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.”  

 

“Quit it, Powder!”  

 

“It’s Jinx and let’s just say I’ve been meaning to make for some lost time when it comes to our sister spats.”  

 

“Hey, just like me and Ace! Man, I’ve really missed this for the last three years.”  

 

“Luffy, please focus on your own fight, I’ll focus on my sister right now without any distractions.”  

 

“No, no, I’m kind of getting into this. This is the kind of wild trashiness I’ve missed these past couple years.”  

 

“See Bubsy gets it.”  

 

“It’s Buggy, how did you forget, do you have brain damage or something?”  

 

As that was going on, Midoriya had finally settled into his test, his blush finally subsiding, thankfully with the aid of Uraraka, as she had introduced herself. His mind was pulled in two directions, concern for his friends and the test in front of him that would determine his future. Deciding the exam’s failure would get him in the doghouse with his allies, he decided to focus on just that until the day was finished. He still had to honour Toshinori’s good faith in him. 

---

Charlie  

OK, this meeting was not going as Charlie hoped it would. The arrival of Velvette and accidentally getting under Carmine’s skin was clearly not a good first impression, but whipping out the Angels head and getting into a flyting duel with Carmine had not endeared Velvette to the rest of the assembly. She patted the head of one of the Egg Boii’s to calm herself. Clearly the Overlords were getting antsy about being trapped in a room with rising temperatures and Lucifers daughter looking like she was busting for a piss with anticipation. 

 “This meeting’s over!” Carmilla slammed her hands to the table, rattling its contents and those sitting around it. Velvette, having got right into her face, retreated and strolled out of the meeting room throwing the finger over her shoulder as she made for the door. 

“Fine, see if I care when Extermination Day comes round, and you fuckers shit the bed.” 

But Charlie couldn’t let the moment to speak pass, not when it looked like everyone was staring to pack up. “WAIT!” Everyone, including Velvette, paused mid step, bar Alastor who leaned back ready for whatever show she was about to put on. “I believe Miss Carmine is correct. We can’t fight back, not separately and definitley not for long. But we can undermine it.” Charlie paused for effect as everyone looked at her with confusion. 

“Explain yourself Morningstar.” Carmine sat back down next to Zestial who now perched his head on both hands to listen. The rest followed suit.  

“The Exterminators are returning in less than six months to continue massacring our people. So I propose a solution.” 

“Yeah, we remember,” interrupted Velvette, who leaned against the door, “talk about shitting the bed, Vox had that disaster played on repeat.” 

“My pitch was, well, it was shit, I get that. But the idea is valid. Hell targets the sinners souls because they fear their uprising. They prune the numbers and stop any more rebellions happening.” 

“And whose fault is it that they seem encouraged to increase their rate of murder. Now you come to us with a convoluted plan to trust this social project. As if it could stop war.” Carmilla intoned with growing frustration. 

“No, we prove the hotel can work and with it, we prove the sinners have an alternative to rising for war. If we showcase positive net results of redemption, then we prove to Heaven that exterminations aren’t their only option to deal with us.” 

The Overlords did not look convinced, many of them looking askance for confirmation if it was alright to leave. Zestial on the other hand. 
“What is it thou require of us? Mayhap we commit our resources to your project as opposed to war.” He looked at Carmine, who seemed to ease when he took up the burden. Alastor eyed the reaction with interest. 

“I need each Overlord to commit at least one sinner to my hotel to go through our redemption protocol. If we have enough proof, they angels will have to consider an alternative route to extermination if they are dealing with a repentant society.” 

Carmine pondered this a moment, side eyeing her daughters who seemed to subtly nod in encouragement and then looked to Alastor. 

“Alastor, you’ve partnered with the Morningstar for this project. Surely you wouldn’t throw in with something you weren’t absolutely sure of.” 

“Why, darling Charlie has shown great strides. And with a little assistance from yours truly, the hotel has already started turning around and fine tuning its treatment process.” 

Velvette chose this moment to intrude, “And how many you got so far, oh right, two blokes without prayer.” 

“Ah yes, I had been meaning to see my lovely Vee, thank you for sending a sinner our way, your patronage is greatly appreciated.” At this Velvette came up short, unable to retort with anything. 

“Is this true Velvette, the Vee’s have already pledged a sinner to the Hazbin Hotel?” 

“Well, we, I, uh...” 

“Actually it’s supposed to be the Happy Hotel but it’s true that Pentious was sent our way by the Vee’s and he has already started on his path to redemption. Either that or the Vee’s were intentionally sabotaging us, in which case they more than likely are threatened by the project for some reason, couldn’t really say.” 

Around everyone cocked an eye in disbelief that she would just say out loud the quiet part. Alastor looked ready to strangle her as his grin strained for ruining his power play, until. 

“Bahahah, your highness you hold nothing back. Now that’s some moxy. I can see why Alastor is batting for your team, oh I’m kidding Alastor, I know you bat for either team.” cackled Rosie with void like eyes and genuine amusement.

“Beg pardon.” 

“Princess, this plan has got way more leverage than any other I’ve been hearing today. Alastor’s right let's give it a shot. All we lose is one sinner each. Rosie’s Emporium stands by the Hazbin Hotel.” 

“Likewise, Carmine holding sees merit in this investment. Very well Princess Morningstar, we each pledge a sinner. Though the Vee’s will be excepted considering they have already contributed their share.” Around some agreed, others remained silent.  

In a huff, Velvette stormed from the meeting room, middle fingers akimbo and slammed the door behind her. Charlie beamed brighter than ever, hugging Vaggie tightly to her who looked upon her fondly. Even Alastor’s rictus grin settled into an easy smirk, though he eyed the mobile device peeking from her pocket with interest. 

---

Midoriya  

The exam was finished, he was in his head so much despite all the hype his friends tried to do and felt like he barely squeaked a B-. But now came the important part. The physical exam, the part that he knew he’d have to face but despite proclaiming his enthusiasm in front of class he knew he’d struggle like it was breathing under water. 

But now he had a quirk. If only he knew what it was. All throughout the exam he was buzzing, the energy slowly unravelling inside him like a tumultuous storm in the sea. It writhed beneath his skin begging to be let out. Slithering around him and pulling up dangerous feelings of stress and frustration. 

Even now, the suppressed feelings from back in Alderra Middle stirred up something fierce. All he had to do was sit through a presentation by Present Mic and he’d be onto the practical. He could barely focus, let alone pay attention to Bakugo sneaking a peak at his placement in a different test zone. His foot was thumping like a crazed rabbit, and he muttered speedily under his breath. Next to him Bakugo grits his teeth as Midoriya’s mumbling wore down both his patience and his enamel. He couldn’t make out the quiet whispering of his chat log phone. 

 

“Excuse me, but this handout clearly lists four robots for battle and not the declared three that you claim. If this is an oversight by UA then I find it highly unbecoming for an institute of this caliber. And another thing, YOU THERE!” A tall bespeckled boy gestured sharply with his whole arm to Midoriya, as though he were trying to cut through the air. “Your muttering and jittery nature is very distracting. Please quieten yourself down and stop making a nuisance of yourself for the rest of us here.” 

Midoriya was pulled from his spiral as he stared down at his accuser. His face reddened as choked laughter spread throughout the auditorium. Bakugo merely seethed that everyone was getting distracted, and his test was taking longer to get to. 

“Deku, shut the fuck up and let’s get this over with. And shut your damn phone off, I can hear it from here.” 

Midoriya fiddled with his device to try mute it but instead amplified it to announce; 

Buggy: Hey, shit stick, why don’t you mind your own business. Not like we have a whole meeting to get through and I’m sticking around for the good stuff.  

 

Jinx: Yeah, back off you tools. How’d you like it if I stood up and started spouting off about how you're the world's meat puppet. What you got a stick shoved up your ass or something.  

 

Vi: Yeah, you can all suck a dick. You try getting through a school test to decide your whole future without turning coal into diamonds in your sphincter.  

 

Buggy: Feel like we utilized the whole range of jokes for the derriere. As you all were, I’m listening to the cockatoo on the pulpit.  

 

A spotlight had lit upon Midoriya when Tenya Iida had called him out and despite Present Mic attempting to get back on track, the impatient audience in Midoriya’s pants were eager to get some heckling done. This left a comatose Iida stuck in an affronted pose, an even more irate Bakugo giving Midoriya and his phone the stink eye and an audience of prospective heroes laughing off the whole thing like it was a scripted side show to alleviate tension before the final stage of exams. Idly, Midoriya wondered where Luffy was that he wasn’t offering support. A ping came through and just before he put his device on silent, he checked a photo sent in by Buggy. 

Photo uploaded: A giant glass box showcasing Luffy partially submerged in water, not wearing his hat and attempting to stand but falling. However, he still had a big grin on his face, both thumbs up towards the camera and a caption read “He wanted to send his support but was locked up, so I took a picture. -Buggy”  

Well, that was disconcerting. Didn’t he mention something about drowning easily. 

---

Luffy  

Being separated from his hat was not ideal but at least he could reminisce about Shanks, how he frequented his village and became his only friend at a time when he was most lonely. Well, him and Uta. He often wondered where Uta disappeared off to. Her sudden absence was a sticking point between him and Shanks for a few days, his first loss before Sabo. Still, they bonded over their shared love of music between the three of them. It brought them together, especially when he thought for sure the guilt would force Shanks to let him join his crew. 

Instead, he was drawn in by the steady subtle drumbeat of the box containing a devil fruit and it changed his life forever. 

But now he had no hat, no powers and no communicator.  

He missed their boisterous nature and strong-willed desires. He still had no idea what Charlie was talking about with those numbers. And he was certain that Midoriya and his grandpa would get along if they ever met. Except unlike grandpa, Midoriya didn’t act like being a pirate was the end of the world. He wished he could take them all along to his ship and be part of his crew. But first thing first, get a ship. Actually, first thing first, get out of the tank. Well, that was handled, at least Luffy thought so. Because his crew were coming for him and Buggy was distracted by the snail. 

---

 

Chat log  

Vi: Ok, I think almost all of us have finished up our missions. Sound off. 

 

Charlie: Success, I’ve managed to persuade the Overlords of Hell to send some sinners my way as part of the redemption plan. It has to be their choice to stay but I’m optimistic. 

 

Luffy: Finally cut Buggy down to size. 

 

Buggy: You literally chopped me into pieces and locked them in separate boxes. 

 

Vaggie: Holy shit Luffy, you’re hard core. 

 

Zoro: Relax, he could already do that, he’s like Luffy and can turn into little pieces. 

 

Angel: Can his dick though? 

 

Buggy: Ugh gross. I regret ever getting involved in this damn thing. I mean, who even thinks about that. 

 

Luffy: Mine can. 

 

Nami: ...what... 

 

Luffy: Yeah, if I hold my breath, it inflates because every part of me is rubber and... 

 

Nami: OK stop, no more. That was way more than I needed to know about my captains' genitals. 

 

Luffy: So, I’m your captain now? 

 

Nami: Figured I owed you one for the trick with the hat. 

 

Luffy: You fixed it, that makes us even. Unlike Buggy, who hurt you guys and stabbed my hat. 

 

Buggy: Yeesh, so angry. You’re the moron who bought into Shanks garbage and believes in the hat. 

 

Zoro: Nah, Luffy believes in himself, that’s more than enough. 

 

Buggy: Laaame! 

 

Luffy: You’re going to go on a trip. One way. 

 

Buggy: Woah woah woah, I thought we were getting along. Let’s not be hasty now. 

 

Nami: And there he goes. 

 

Charlie: Not going to lie, I liked his commentary. 

 

Vaggie: Says the girl who had John Wayne Gacey as her birthday clown. 

 

Charlie: Not my dad's best moment, he was really distracted at the time and the first clown that wasn’t Mamon just so happened to be that guy. Thankfully dad drove a flame sword up his ass and had him flogged in the street before he did anything. 

 

Zoro: Flaming sword? Neat. 

 

Luffy: Man, I wish took some of that nice looking food. I know they need it but I’m starving! 

 

Nami: Why am I with this crew again? 

 

Angel: Look, he’s got a rubber penis- 

 

Nami: Cease! 

 

User: Umm, hey there. Is this Midoriya’s extended family? 

 

Vi: What’s going on here? Who’s this? 

 

User: Err, Hi, I’m Uraraka. 

 

Jinx: Oh hey, the chick who was chatting up Midorkya early on. 

 

Uraraka: No I wasn’t. That’s not true. And he’s not a dork. He just saved my life and pulled me from danger. I was just wondering if you guys know how to help him. His quirk is acting up. 

 

Charlie; Oh sweet, he was talking about that earlier.  What’s it looking like? 

 

Uraraka: I guess I should show you because I think it’s going a bit haywire 

 

Video stream has begun: A video of Midoriya shows him elevated in midair and from the surface of his body, strands of black green energy is snaking out in all directions, some wrapping around students who were trapped near a giant robot monstrosity and others that were directly attacking said monstrosity. The robot was being torn apart from multiple angles and from the inside out, as they pierced the metal plates and glass eyes, sprouting out the back like a shadowy hedgehog. Midoriya was screaming.  

 

Vi: Holy hell, what’s it doing? It looks like it’s tearing him apart. 

 

Cait: It looks like Hex tech, destroying everything around it. Is it a gadget or something? 

 

Charlie: He looks like my ex-boyfriend. I didn’t know Von Eldritch powers reached to this realm. 

 

Vaggie: Charlie please don’t mention Eldritch. I don’t know why, but I feel like this scenario is ripe for a lawsuit. 

 

Angel: I know right. So much property damage. 

Uraraka: So do any of you know how to help. I’m worried he’s in pain. It’s both awesome and scary at the same time. 

 

Vi: Damn, I wish Lucy was here, she could probably talk him down. 

 

Jinx: Yeah, the mess up there looks like my head on a bad day. Just a big pile of intrusive thoughts, rage and impotent frustration. Brain noodles. 

 

Luffy: Yeah, looks like squid ink noodles. Tasty. 

 

Uraraka: But can he control it. 

 

Luffy: Eh probably not, he only got it like this morning. He's probably settling into it. 

 

Uraraka: He got it this morning!? 

 

Vi: Who let him near the chat? 

 

Charlie: We really should have known better than to let him talk to new people. 

 

Nami: I blame myself; I should have distracted him. Here Luffy, play with your hat. 

 

Luffy: It’s all brand new. Thanks, Nami. 

 

Nami: Sorry Luffy. 

 

Luffy: For what-OW, how did that hurt. You hit just like my Grampa. 

 

Nami: What was that? 

 

Zoro: Damn Nami, are you going to take that? 

 

Luffy: He punches ships for a living. 

 

Zoro: Never mind then. 

 

Vi: You know, I’ve been meaning to talk to Lucy, we still have some beef over here between my sister, Caitlyn and I. Anyone got some idea where she is.  

 

Angel: Probably best to get her in before bullets start flying. 

 

User: I’m afraid Ms McClane isn’t in a position to do much mediatin’. She’s a little tied up right now. 

 

Luffy: I get it, she’s literally tied up. 

 

User: ...yeah, that was implied.  

 

Charlie: Well... then... let her go. 

 

User: At least I know where she got her attitude from, even for a vaultiue she’s too damn polite. Y’all from the same vault then. 

 

Vi: YO! Not all of us are a bunch of pussies. 

 

Charlie: Hey! 

 

Midoriya: Woah! 

 

Nami: Not cool. 

 

Luffy: Oh hey, are we though? ‘Cause Shanks always said getting me to do anything is like herding cats and we have no control when we start talking. 

 

Vaggie: Not the same thing Luffy. God, can you let Lucy go, she’s usually much better at talking to him. 

 

Zoro: Hey prune face put her on before come out there and turn your face into juice. 

 

User: You know what, you talk to these morons, I can’t handle this. 

Lucy: Sweet Jesus he’s drowning me. For the love of God, get me out of here. 

 

User: For the record, y’all can call me Cooper, not Prune Face. Now howsit this thing works? 

 

Midoriya: Oh you press the button in the corner to activate the stream. 

 

Charlie: Jesus Christ Midoriya. Even I wouldn’t... 

Chapter 8: Exam fallout and other puns

Summary:

Now begins the feedback stage of our previous missions and where our characters headspaces are at.

Notes:

How long has it been? Let's see the date. OH BOY!
As the Invisible Woman said to Mr Fantastic, that's a stretch!

I honestly have no excuse for taking this long but I do want to finish at least one arc in this story, so I'm in it for the long haul.

You may see some characters here who might not seem to belong. But if you are familiar with the universe of origin, then the best option is always go with the familiar characters and not always make OCs.

Chapter 8

Uraraka: Hey Midoriya, are you sure you should be talking right now? You’re pretty out of it after you passed out.  

 

Charlie: What happened earlier? We just saw him freaking out with tentacles and suddenly he’s fine.  

 

Uraraka: His quirk must be acting up. First thing I remember is me being trapped under some debris because the Exam unleashed this like huge mecha on us. Next thing I know, I’m being hoisted into the air, Midoriya is screaming and pulling himself towards the mecha with one of those tentacles and punches a whole bunch of them into it. Then he screamed in pain, the tentacle holding me up disappeared and we started falling. I had to use my quirk on him again and then I caught the other two he picked up when they fell in front of the giant robot. Now he’s barely hanging in there. 

 

Midoriya: Sorry there, could you hold onto my phone for a second, I need to get a single point. Just one point and I can leave here with my head held high. 

 

Uraraka: Oh Midoriya, you’re barely hanging on by a thread. I don’t know how, but it looks like you’ve broken every bone in your arms. 

 

Midoriya: Uraraka... Uraraka you’re hurt. I’m sorry if my quirk hurt you but I think I’m literally coasting on adrenaline right now and my mind isn’t quite aware of what I’m saying. 

 

Vi: Hey, Uraka, whatever your name is, tell the bozo he’s in for an injunction later, we’re going over every mistake he made if he’s only now working on getting points. 

Jinx: What are you, a coach?  

 

Vi: His coach if he doesn’t shape up and your coach if you don’t back off. 

 

User: Exam over, all examinees stand down. Points will be counted and medical will be distributed. 

 

Midoriya: Oh darn, I guess I failed, didn’t I? 

 

Charlie: Midoriya no, Uraraka, please give him hug because i physically can’t be there right now. 

 

Luffy: Nah, he screwed up. He needs to pick himself up. 

 

Uraraka: WHAAAAAAT! I can’t do that, it’s inappropriate. 

 

Vaggie: Inapro-bitch what? Sorry, sorry, you just caught me off guard. Charlie, don’t force people into unnecessary bonding, remember what happened with my trust exercises. 

 

Charlie: Yes, sorry, you’re right. Miss Uraraka, don’t worry, you don’t have to hug anyone if it makes you uncomfortable. How are you feeling right now by the way? 

 

Uraraka: Bleagh! 

 

Midoriya: The nice girl just vomited and I’m going to pass out. Night. 

 

Midoriya has signed off  

 

Cooper: Oof, he’s gonna feel that in the morning if he doesn’t get help soon. Oh well, gotta go, lotta torturing to do! 

 

Lucy has signed off  

 

Charlie: Shit! We’re dropping like flies. I was riding such a good high from that win and now Lucy’s gotten captured, Midoriya is broken. 

 

Angel: He’s like Alastor if he got the munchies. 

 

User: Hah! Now all I can imagine is Alastor smoking some reefer. 

 

Angel: Hey I made kitty laugh. 

 

User: I resent that mental image Husker. Nor do I take kindly to comparisons to the living. 

 

Charlie: Alastor, Husk, thank you for joining us. I was about to use this opportunity to teach Angel about empathy. 

User names changed to Alastor and Husk

Alastor: We’ll pass. 

Husk: We’ll pass. 

 

Caitlyn: Not to rain on your parade anymore but, Vi, I think we’ve got company.  

 

Vi: Powder, saddle up, we need to get through this and work our crap out later. You with me Pow-pow? 

 

Powder: Only you can call me that and get me raring to go for violence. Lock and load! 

 

Vi: ...filing that away for later... 

 

Vi has signed off  

 

Charlie: Darn, darn, darny, darn. Ugh, anyone else got problems? 

 

Zoro: Hey, I think our boat is sinking. 

 

Nami: Wait what, now you tell me. Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap! 

 

Charlie: Oh come on! I was kidding... OK Charlie deep breaths... Let’s try and look on the positive side. Instead of focusing on the negative, think how we can turn this into a positive. Vi isn’t in trouble, she has three friends to help her and one of them is her finally reunited long lost sister. Midoriya isn’t broken... he... he... He made a brand-new friend. And Luffy... 

 

Luffy: This is the best time to go looking for a new boat. Three masts, with a giant figurehead! 

 

Charlie: That’s the spirit! 

 

Nami: We will be spirits if we don’t hightail it to the next island. So get on some paddles and start rowing! 

 

Zoro: Funny witch, like I couldn’t swim there. Good luck carrying that safe. 

 

Nami: I don’t need the safe, I have the map, or were you asleep for that too. 

 

Zoro: I don’t remember, I was sleeping. 

 

Luffy: All together now, brand new ship, with brand new cabins and brand new storage rooms ready to be filled with meat. 

 

Zoro: Man, that sounds really good right now. 

 

Nami: Y’know, yelling at you is like yelling at a labrador, fine, I’ll help row. 

 

Luffy: So you're saying I remind you of Chou Chou? 

 

Nami: Who’s Chou Chou? 

 

Luffy: From the last island, remember the dog. 

 

Nami: No, what dog are you talking about? 

 

Luffy has signed off  

 

Charlie: Well, smooth sailing for them from here on out. All that’s left is Lucy and... 

 

Husk: Nah, all we can do is pray. 

 

User: Huh, can we pray? We’re in Hell, so would we be asking one of our guys to save them? Would they save them? 

 

Husk: Nifty, I don’t know. 

 

User name changed to Nifty  

 

Alastor: So, then Charlie, what is the next point of call for the hotel, hmm? 

 

Charlie: Unless we can somehow traverse the bounds of the multiverse, something I don’t think any angel or demon has done, all we can do is progress with our new guests. They’ll be arriving tomorrow. 

 

Charlie has signed out  

---

Next Day  

 

VI: Well, me and Cait are now separated from my sister, we’re captured, and we have no way of getting to Silco. 

 

Cait: I’m sitting here trying to tell her that asking the council is the most prudent way forward. 

 

Charlie: And I’m here wondering how you are able to be so calm after being seperated from your long lost sister after only just getting reunited? 

 

Cait: She wasn’t, she was screaming bloody murder and cursing our guards for at least an hour. Now she’s blindingly livid to the point of sensibility. 

 

Husk: Oh, so like me every morning. 

 

Charlie: Husker, come on, I know you’re not that angry all the time. 

 

Nifty: He’s in a simmering rage on an almost constant daily basis. 

 

Husk: Don’t tell me how I feel being chained to this place. Believe me, if I had the opportunity, I’d book it out of here so fast you wouldn’t tell if you were talking to an afterimage or a hallucination because I served you straight absinthe.  

 

Luffy: Guess who made it back? 

 

Husk: Oh God damn it! 

 

Nami: Barely, we barely made it. And why are you carrying that stupid thing with you everywhere? 

 

Luffy: It’s our Jolly Rodger and we need to fly it high and proud when we get our new ship. 

 

Zoro: How are we getting that by the way? Cause looking at these posters, we passed up on a 15,000,000 berrie bounty with the freaking clown. 

 

Luffy: Not like we could hand him in, since we’re on the run now.  

 

Zoro: Huh, didn’t think about that, you might be right. 

 

Luffy: But I have a plan. 

 

Nami: 15 mill- just breath in Nami, let it go. Alright brave Captain, how do we go about getting this ship. 

 

Cooper: I might recommend doin’ some odd jobs round town. Get your rep up with the locals and earn enough to buy your keep. 

 

Nami: Oh wow, I would listen to that if you hadn’t kidnapped and tortured some poor lady. 

Vi: Yeah, where the hell did you take Lucy, what did you do to her? 

 

Cooper: Now, like yourself, I’ve mellowed out since we last piped in, and I’ll tell ya, I was shouting bloody murder like yourself after what she done did. So come on Vaultie, talk to your friends. 

 

Midoriya: Lucy, are you okay? 

 

Lucy: ...I’m (cough) fine. Just peachy. Oh Midoriya, I heard you saved someone in the hero exam. Congrats, I’m super proud. 

 

Cooper: Well, ain’t she a doll, thinkin’ bout others while baking in the heat. 

 

Midoriya: You let her go or I swear... ugh... still feel tired after yesterday... 

 

Cooper: Or what hero? You gonna come over here and teach me a lesson? Or are you gonna snap your bones like twigs just trying to throw a punch? 

 

Angel: I’m just going to say that it’s weird how we have two folks kidnapped at the same time. Yo Vag, you wanna throw yourself into the jaws of the exorcists? Maybe we can all go on a rescue mission at the same time. 

 

Vaggie: Piss off Angel, now is not the time to crack jokes. And you, now is not the time to be taunting us! 

 

Cooper: Apologies if I’m steppin’ on some toes while here but this has proven to be the highlight of my day. Beats out any radio station like that damn yokel who still plays that fucking fiddle music. 

 

Charlie: Well, you’re about to see what happens when we demons set our minds to something, such as saving our friends. 

 

Cooper: Don’t yall have an alcoholics anonymous meeting to go to. 

 

Vi: Any hair on her head out of place and I swear... 

 

Cooper: Oh dang, you certainly changed your tune since yesterday. Tell you what, how bout I fiddle about in her head, and you get a brand-new little sister. 

 

Cait: You can’t mess with her like that. Right now, we acknowledge she’s your hostage, but you need to acknowledge that she is much more valuable whole and unblemished. 

 

Cooper: Oh I understand you really well missy. Believe me sheriff, what I need requires only a little bit presentation. All they need is the body, but the mind is free to play with. 

 

Angel: Woah. Back the fuck off. You can’t sell her body like that. And don’t even think about fucking with her head, who do you think you are that a human can act like this. I’m a demon, I know I’m fucked up. 

 

Cooper: Law of the wasteland. You take what you can get and make do with what you have. Vaultie here needs to get with the program and adapt if she ever hopes to get to her daddy. 

 

Midoriya: No. 

 

Cooper: Beg pardon. 

 

Charlie: Midoriya? 

 

Luffy: No. 

 

Nami: Luffy, stay out of this. You have no idea what they’re talking about. 

 

VI: No. 

 

Caitlyn: Vi, let me handle this, hostage negotiation is my job. 

 

Vi: Your job is a beat cop, and you're tied to a pole. You listen to us you shimmer faced; undercity reject. 

 

Midoriya: Lucy doesn’t need us to rescue her. You need to know who you’re getting involved with. 

 

Luffy: Because there is no way you can hurt her in any way that matters. 

 

Nami: Luffy stop, you don’t know what he can do, you’ve never seen how a prisoner can suffer at the hands of her captors. You’ve never talked to a girl at the mercy of someone else. 

 

Luffy: No, I haven’t. But I know Lucy. And I know she will kick your ass before she gives up on finding her dad. 

 

Cooper: Interesting theory. And what say you Vaultie? WHAT THE-AW DANGIT! Y’all best pipe down, you gone riled her up- OOF! 

 

Lucy: You guys take care of yourselves. I’ll manage on my end. Thank you. Thank you so much. 

 

Lucy has logged off  

 

Charlie: She’s right, we can’t let ourselves be distracted from our own improvement. We need to keep ourselves busy. 

 

Midoriya: Wait. What was that about going after him? 

 

Vaggie: Yeah, unfortunately, we don’t necessarily have the authority or the ability to traverse dimensions. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was some heavenly decree to halt interdimensional travel or harshly punish those who attempt to do so without established conditions. 

 

Vi: That was a textbook. What were you, some kind of secretary demon. 

 

Nifty: Either that or a secretary in life. 

 

Vaggie: But back to the point! Fact is, that was a bluff that for some reason he didn’t buy. You'd think with the concept of multiverse and multiple pictures as evidence, he’d believe in it. 

Luffy: Must have seen a whole bunch of stuff in his life then if this doesn’t phase him. 

 

Midoriya: That... adds up, that really adds up. The nuclear wasteland must be home to a cavalcade of mutations, temporal schisms and potentially horrific disfigurations. No wonder he’s not thrown off by the appearance of demons, the existence of quirks or talks about magic. More than likely he’s encountered people who’ve showcased these facets and- 

 

Caitlyn: Slow down please, right now we’re black bagged and only hearing you is sending me into a spiral. 

 

Midoriya: Sorry. 

 

Caitlyn: But what you said, about temporal schisms? 

 

Midoriya: Turns out, massive quantities of energy being released simultaneously could potentially match the energy output of the large hadron collider. It was just a theory based on what Lucy said a couple of weeks ago. It’s not proven but it is viable. 

 

Vi: Were you trying to run away if you failed the hero test? 

 

Midoriya: No, definitely not! 

 

Vi: Good, because I’ve been meaning to have a word with you about your point score. 

 

Midoriya: Is now a good time, while you’re captured? 

 

Nami: Best thing to do is distract yourself until your plan can be set in motion. That’s what me and Zoro did while we worked on a way out from Buggy. 

 

Vi: I got my plan set, now I'm stalling for time. So fess up, why wasn’t your head in the game? You said your feet moved or something? 

 

Midoriya: moved without thinking, yeah. I think I was boiling over or distracted or maybe second guessing myself. I mean, I was going to take my first step into heroism with All Mights quirk. I can’t help but feel like not only was I unworthy, but I was not putting my attention in the right direction. What with everyone struggling or suffering in some way. 

 

Zoro: You’ve got to look out for yourself man. We can’t keep getting in our own heads about everything wrong in the world. Just confront it when it happens. 

 

Vi: You're getting in your own way. That Uraraka chick showed the rest of us you could do it. Hell, you showed us you do it. 

 

Charlie: Like Vaggie said, we’re stuck here, we can figure out your theory in time but not if it causes us to trip up.  

 

Luffy: I’d say trust that Lucy can handle herself. She got herself this far. We got to this town and now we’re going to ask for a boat. Vi’s still alive and- 

 

Nami: Wait, what do you mean we’re asking for a boat?  

 

Luffy: No stealing, a boat is part of the crew and we’re not dishonoring it by stealing our first real ship. 

 

Nami: Ok, never mind what they said, please find a way over here so you can beat some sense into this guy! I thought you were a pirate? 

 

Midoriya: A different kind of pirate. 

 

Luffy: Thank you! 

 

Nami: Except for you! Anyone else, Vi, Angel, Zoro, tell him how to act like a pirate! 

 

Luffy: I don’t know, if he did bad in the test maybe Midoriya will be a hero on his own, a different kind of hero. 

 

Midoriya: That’s vigilantism and looked down on around here. Besides Nami, do you want Luffy to be hardened criminal, like Cooper? 

Nami: No. Not like him. Not like... 

 

Charlie: Besides, not like you’re totally out of the running, you can make it to the hero course, I have faith. 

 

Caitlyn: Funny, the princess of Hell has more faith than the underdog. 

 

Vi: You talking about me? 

 

Caitlyn: Regardless, your theory intrigues me Midoriya. If we get out of this- 

 

Vi: When! 

 

Caitlyn: When we get out of this, I need to speak with my friend Jayce. He was my tutor and is a genius when it comes to power sources and teleportation. 

 

Vi: Wonderboy? 

 

Mrs Midoriya: Honey! It came, it came, it came! Your admission letter came! 

 

Vi: Mrs Midoriya’s back! 

 

All: HURRAY! 

 

Luffy: I notice he didn’t say he wouldn’t be a vigilante. Only that it wasn’t accepted. 

 

Vi: Say... Midoriya, do you know something about vigilantes? 

 

Mrs Midoriya: No, he doesn’t because he is a good boy. 

 

Luffy: If we ever figure out this travelling thing, do you want to join my crew? You looked strong last time, and we could do with some strong fighters. 

 

Charlie: No wait, come to my hotel! We need some more volunteers and you would make a great psychologist. 

 

Caitlyn: In that case, don’t come here, Vi is afraid of psychologists. 

 

Vi: Fucking hilarious.  

 

Midoriya: Guys, what the hell, I thought you were supporting me, now your giving me worst case scenarios! 

 

Husk: Well, like that Lucy chick said, trust but verify. So, hope for the best, expect the worst. 

 

Midoriya: It’s a hologram. 

 

All: A what? 

 

Charlie: Oh, oh, oh, stream it! Let’s all watch it as part of ooooour SHOW AND TELL! 

 

Caitlyn: Bloody hell, what is this kindergarten!? 

 

Angel: I got a tape just ripe for viewing 

 

Midoriya: Here goes! 

 

All Might:  I know it's been a while, but with great power, comes a great amount of paperwork. But recent events have forced UA to expedite this process. My apologies, young man. The truth is, I didn't come to this city just to fight villains. You're looking at the newest UA faculty member. 
 

Midoriya: Holy Crap! 

 

Mrs Midoriya: Language! But yeah, holy CRAP! 

 
All Might: Huh? Yes, what's the matter? Who's showboating? Oh, sorry. I'll wrap it up, but I have to show him something first. Wait. I have to do how many of these things? [sighs] Right! So, moving on. 
 

Charlie: Oh man, here it comes! 

 
All Might: Even though you passed the written test, you got zero combat points 
in the practical exam. Sorry. 
Midoriya: I know that. Of course, I know. It's all I've thought about. 
 

Mrs Midoriya: Hold on sweetie. 

 
Midoriya: I'm a failure. 
 

Vi: Jeez, calm down. Let him finish. 

 
All Might: Fortunately, there were other factors. But before we get to that, 
I have another surprise. Here! Look! A short clip for your viewing pleasure!  
Uraraka: Um, do you have a sec? Sorry to interrupt. 
 
Nami: Oh hey, it's that nice girl. 
 

Midoriya: Nami please, not while I’m emotionally compromised. 

 
All Might: She showed up after the exam to talk about you, young man. 
What did she have to say? You'll have to stay tuned to find out! 
 

Angel: I’ve seen less showmanship from Vox and Deer head combined. 

 

Alastor: My ears are ringing. Speak about me like that again and so will your neck. 

 
Uraraka: You know that boy with the really messy hair and all the tentacles? It's hard to describe his face. He's kinda plain‐looking. Uh, doesn't really stand out or anything, you know? 
 

Vi: Ayo, what the hell? Is this really your girl Midoriya? 

 

Zoro: Talkin’ shit. 

 

Midoriya: I, she, we’re not... wait plain looking? Not standing out? 

 

Vaggie: Yeah, what’s she talking about, you were literally a twenty-foot abomination tearing apart a five-story robot like it was paper. Doesn’t stand out my ass. 

 

Uraraka: I was wondering. Would it be possible to give him some of the points I earned in the exam? I heard him say something about wanting to get a point, any point before he passed out. which just seems crazy. How could someone who took down that huge villain all by himself not have any points in the end? So please, give him half my points. If someone like that needs the points to get in, then he deserves all the points I got.  That’s what being a hero means, to put a smile on another person's face and let them know it’s going to be OK. He can be a hero. He’s my hero. 

 

Mrs Midoriya: Oh sweetie. You saved her. You are a true hero. 

 

Vi: Man, it’s like a girl you Midoriya. Going on about heroism and shit. This chat is going to be insufferable when you start going to UA.   

 

Midoriya: When? 

 

All Might: How can a hero school turn away a prospective hero who sacrifices themselves for the greater good, who inspires such admiration among his peers. That is why we have rescue points. 

 

Vi: Boo, weak twist. 

 

Charlie: It really is a hero school. Oooh, how deceptive, I gotta try that. 

 

Husk/Angel: Please don’t. Stop copying me. 

 

All Might: With overwhelming majority commendations, Young Midoriya; seventy points. Miss Uraraka; eighty-six points. Congratulations Young Midoriya. 

 

Midoriya: I... 

 

Luffy: I knew he’d do it. He found his own way. 

 

Nami: It’s like the two of you have your own circle of bullshit luck. 

 

Charlie: Congratulations to our resident hero. 

 

Vi: Not bad little man. Not bad at all. 

 

Caitlyn: Absolutely excellent. Now it’s going to be two on one with you Vi. Postive reinforcement from all sides. 

 

Vi: Why cupcake, are you implying the two of you will double team me? 

 

Angel: She’s a lady after my own heart. 

 

Caitlyn: He’s still underage. 

 

Angel: I don’t know this lady. 

 

Mrs Midoriya: Oh honey I’m so proud of y- Honey, sweetie, you're not moving. Folks, I think my son has gone into a catatonic state, Back in a bit. 

 

Midoriya has logged off.  

 

User: Helllooo everyone. Have I missssed something? 

 

Charlie: Pentious. Great news, one of our friends has made great strides in becoming a hero in his world.  

 

User name changed to Pentious  

 

Pentious: A hero. Huzzah, perhaps we shall do battle in the near future. At last, a worthy opponent, our battle will be- 

 

Alastor: Over in a second, especially since I’ve had the chance to review the young man’s performance. I must say, he’s a chip off the old block.  

 

Charlie: Alastor, please don’t corrupt the innocent in the hotel. 

 

Alastor: Well technically I have the right to corrupt whomever I like outside the hotel, especially one outside of Hell. And besides, if he should fall so easily to the likes of me, well then he really shouldn’t be a hero should he. 

 

Charlie: Ehe, I guess morals aren’t truly merited unless they are sustained in extermis. But Pentious, you had something to say? 

 

Pentious: Ah yessss, our new batch of sinners have arrived. They are... eccentric. 

 

Vaggie: ...well shit, if you’re saying that. 

 

User: Ugh, I don’t wanna be here, this sucks. 

 

User: Nyeh, this place looks pretty swanky see. Not as big as my old mansion but well worth seeing all the hullabaloo. 

 

User: Indubitably my fine friend. I wonder what fine experiements we shall endeavor upon here. So many test subjects! 

 

User: Please keep your miscreant hands to yourself, I shall partake in my own experiments, each one delicate and not requiring either of your inputs. 

 

User: Oh Em Gee. This is just like my fanfics, a super deluxe hotel and in Hell. And a bunch of sexy demons who could take advantage of me and ravage me all night. Don’t mind me, I’ll be leaving my key under the welcome mat. 

 

Rosie: OK nobody touches her. She may be dead, but she was definitely of questionable mental faculties. 

 

Charlie: NEW SINNERS. Let’s make it extra special for them guys. Welcome everyone to the Hazbin Hotel, HAPPY hotel, we were just starting our show and tell, to get to know each other better. Angel Dust was just about to show his video. 

 

Charlie has logged off  

 

Luffy: Hey guys, I think this boat is talking to me.  

 

User: Nope, just me. But I wouldn’t be surprised given the love and care that went into making this beauty. You’re looking at a top-of-the-line caravel, fastest in the east blue and nigh uncatchable. 

 

Nami: Oh thank God, literally anything else to distract from the overflow of all that craziness I just had to endure. 

 

Zoro: So this is the ship. Yeah, I can dig it. 

 

Vi: And then there were two. Spirits save us, I can’t believe I’m actually waiting on Lucy to get back to us. 

 

Luffy: Sounds like you miss her. 

 

Caitlyn: Sounds like she misses her sister. 

 

Vi: Yes, I miss my sister. Please stop bringing it up. 

 

Caitlyn: But you’re the one- 

 

Lucy: I live Goddamn it. Finally got a second to myself away from that psycho. 

 

User: Hey so, I know the boat doesn’t talk but it definitely sounds like your hat is talking. 

 

Nami: For Gods sake Luffy, do you still keep that snail under your hat? 

 

Luffy: Safest place to keep it. 

 

User: Woah, now that is a fancy looking snail. Last time I saw one like that, I had pilfered an entire ships worth from the last pirates who invaded our island. 

 

Zoro: When was that? 

 

User: Oh you wouldn’t get any information from the townsfolk, they wouldn’t even remember when the last pirate attack was. 

 

Luffy: What did you do with all those snails you pilfered? 

 

User: Set them free to roam the seas and allow a bunch of sea beasts to contact each other. Poor guys haven’t seen each other in centuries. Beasts from the east blue have never even spoken to the ones in the west.  

 

Nami: And what exactly do they have to talk about? 

 

User: The latest sea king gossip. They talk all the time; we just never hear it. 

 

Vi: Oh, by the celestials, this guy is full of it. You’re not buying this bilge, are you? 

 

Caitlyn: This is Luffy we’re talking about. So most likely. 

 

User: Call me Usopp, if you're interested in a ship, I’m your man. 

 

User name changed to Usopp  

 

Vi: This couldn’t possibly drill into my senses any more than it already has, I’m pretty sure they are as numb as my wrists. 

 

User: On your feet, we got some questions for you. 

 

Caitlyn: Don’t hurt her please. Vi! 

 

Vi: Cait! Hold on, let me talk to her! 

 

Usopp: ...they’re going to be fine right. Because that sounds like it could be a big problem. 

 

Luffy: Meh, they can handle it. 

 

Nami: Luffy... no, you’re probably right. Maybe you can get us a ship just by asking. 

 

Usopp: Well if it’s this ship you’re asking for, then I know exactly who you can talk to. Let’s walk and talk. So mysterious hat snail, what’s happening with you? 

 

Lucy: I just bit the ghoul's thumb off. He cut mine off in return. 

 

Usopp: ...Great! 

 

 

 

Chapter 9: How did these idiots survive this long?

Summary:

Here's a question: Why does nobody question where this chat came from? Or if its actually a product of someone's quirk or magic or advance technology made by someone in the same universe?

Here's another question: how have these guys survived this long?

Midoriya had never been more nervous than right now, standing at the threshold of UA and nerves buzzing with excitement. To think, facing off against a five-story robot, running into danger against a slime villain and talking to a girl would cause him the least amount of anxiety.  

At the back of his mind was Lucy, still captive and himself unable to help. Vi and Caitlyn at the whims of their captors, Powder lost to the winds, and Charlie had to deal with a cavalcade of insane sinners who ended up in hell for one reason or another. At least Luffy made him laugh.  

Luffy: Hey Midoriya!  

Speaking of. He whipped out his phone and held it up to his ear. “Hey Luffy, you caught me just as I was going to UA. I can’t believe it, I’m walking the halls where All Might, Endeavor and Best Jeanist walked.”  

He passed by the hero Midnight, who looked mightily affronted she wasn’t listed in the category of famous alumni. He ducked his head in red faced embarrassment and shuffled on, leaving a cackling Present Mic and miffed Midnight in his wake.  

Nami: Fun. Anyway the reason we called was I need some feedback. This dress, good or no?  

Nami has uploaded a picture  

Midoriya lowered the phone to look at the screen to see Nami, dressed to the nines in a silky black dress and hair pulled back from her face in a neat bun. He tried to mutter out some semblance of a compliment that would appeal to her, only coming up with, “Sexy.” He paused mid-step and blue screened. He had no idea where that came from. ' No wait, Angel dust and Vi. They keep talking like that so much I kind of roll with it.’  

Two people didn’t know that sentiment was involuntary. One cooed in approval with a teasing “oooh” coming from those present with her. The other was Aizawa who raised an unimpressed eyebrow at the teen ogling a lady on his phone and verbally phrasing sexy in his presence. 
“Phones away. The Headmaster sent me to guide you. And please, never make me listen to you utter the word sexy with my own ears ever again. This way.” 

It was a wonder he didn’t burst ever blood vessel in his body at this stage. So, he tucked his phone away and followed after Aizawa. But not before spotting Nami’s next picture, her unzipping the back of the dress and winking while sticking her tongue out.  

 

Zoro: Witch.  

 

Nami: Think of it as training for when he gets a girlfriend.  

 

Luffy: Why would embarrassing him be the same as getting a girlfriend?  

 

Nami: Wow. So you and Midoriya have never spoken to a girl.  

 

Luffy: Yes I have. In fact, my old friend did that to me as well. But I got her back, she didn’t like my singing at all.  

Nami: That’s almost adorable. But you’re going to need to update your vocabulary, especially when it comes to complimenting women.   

---

Midoriya had reached the door to Principal Nezu’s office, Aizawa giving him the stink eye the entire way. He knocked and wandered off, tugging at the scarf around his neck. “Midoriya, you’re applying for the Hero Course, correct?”  

“Erm, yes Mr Aizawa.”  

“Then you may want to work on your perception.”  

“Sorry sir, it was a support group that sent me the picture to ask my opnion.”  

“And you gave it. Just be grateful it wasn’t Midnight escorting you. But that’s not what I’m talking about.” At this, the scarf around his neck began to shift and wiggle, when a small mammal emerged from the bundle and perched on his shoulder. 
“Am I a mouse, a bear or a shrew? Doesn’t matter because I’m your principal.” The dapper marsupial slid to the ground and stood before Midoriya, though he came up to his shoulders he seemed to exude confidence. “Well Mr. Midoriya, shall we adjourn to my office. I’ll see you later Mr. Aizawa, ta-ta.” 

Aizawa turned about and waved off a smiling principal and shocked Midoriya. Soon seated in the office, the two were eventually joined by Toshinori. While Nezu served tea, Toshinori spoke, “I’m glad you got the note I left in the letter. You did destroy it afterwards correct? We can’t afford to leave a footprint. All this is, is a pre-academic interview.”  

“Yeah, I destroyed it, don’t worry. But I have to admit, I do feel pretty nervous. What did you urgently need to talk to me about?” Nezu finished the same time Midoriya did and addressed him, “Recent change in circumstances came to light with your entrance exam Mr. Midoriya. That was quite a spectacle you put on, even Maijima was figuratively blown away when you literally blew away the zero pointer. This left us with some questions pertaining to your quirk.”  

“oh crap, I forgot to adjust my quirk registration from quirkless, we’ll be found out, I’ll be kicked out, the HPSC will come for us and...” his mutterings petered out when Toshinori patted him on the shoulder and gave him a supportive glance.  

“Young Midoriya, you don’t need to worry about One for All getting out here in UA. Nezu here already knows, as do a few others. We’re just trying to get a handle of how your quirk works.”  

“Indeed. When Toshinori informed me about his choice I of course buttressed any speculation until I could see your ability in a combat scenario. I must say, I was not expecting such a display of power, especially since I was expecting you to inherit the power of All Mights fantastic strength.”  

“Yeah, I won’t lie, it was intense, and scary. I had not control and everything felt like it was being torn apart.”  

Toshinori knelt before Midoriya and caught his focus. “That feeling you had, think back to it, how did the power feel? Coursing through your body like that, can you remember the sensation?”  

“Like... electricity, hitting every part of my body. Whenever I felt like using it to help someone, my muscles jolted and pulled, almost involuntarily. It was like... oh, like when you touch your hand to an electric fence.”  

“Seriously, that’s the mental image you choose? Couldn’t be something cooler?”  

“You mean like the sensation of clenching my butt cheeks?”  

Toshinori recoiled as if struck and gagged, Nezu meanwhile cackled in good spirit, “Ouch kid, way to put me on blast. Granted, for an inheritor of my great power, I imagine I should give better advice.”  

“I should say so Toshinori, especially considering I am giving you a role as one of my educators in this fine establishment. A rank not given to just anybody. Do please plan out your instructions and class plan a little better next time.”  

  At this, the conversation became a trade of limited information as speculation about the origin of this power came and went. The only conclusion, One for All possessed access to greater power that one of the previous inheritors held. This led to speculation about other powers belonging to the previous wielders and what this meant for his training. Nezu decided to close out the meeting. “All things considered, it seems the notion of inheriting prior wielders quirks also comes with the ceveat that it inherits a strength booster regardless.”  

“Then that means, the quirk is stronger and therefore my body needs to get stronger. I’ll need to step up my training regimen if I don’t want to fall behind.”  

Nezu clapped lightly and smiled at Toshinori, “Oh yes, I must say you chose excellently a perfect successor. That is why, since you have been alocated a seat in out heroics course, you may avail of the training gym alpha. Can’t have you enter a course with only a bare understanding of your quirk.”  

At this, Midoriya shrunk, “I don’t know, isn’t that kind of cheating to get a head start of my classmates.”  

“Well young man, how about you think of it as extra credit. After all, we provide different conditions for our recommendation students. Think of this as an exceptional case given you have pretty severe handicap.”  

“Quirk experience!”  

“Exactly. You’ve only had your quirk for over twenty four hours. Compared to the rest of the hero fledglings, they’re running a full sprint while you are hobbling towards the starting line.”  

“Well said Toshinori. I hope to see that level of passion in your classroom. Remember, random inspections are random.” At that, Nezu leapt atop his desk and stood before Midoriya, leaning towards him, “Now that’s out of the way, perhaps we can touch upon some unique information that came to my attention, specifically a communication device where a number of individuals were providing colorful commentary and a play-by-play of their circumstances. Upon your collapse into unconsciousness due to Recovery Girls treatment, the device shut down and was recovered by your future classmate, miss Uraraka. Care to explain?”  

 Midoriya felt sweat begin to bead out along his spine and brow. He withheld any explanation to avoid spluttering his first thought. But he couldn’t think of any explanation that wouldn’t get him labelled as either a test subject for CERN or incarcerated in Tartarus. 
Nezu leaned back and sat on his desk, “Apologies. I didn’t mean to raise any hackles. It's just that when word of this device reached me, a few of the teachers raised concern that you had been live streaming the test or worse, was receiving continuous instruction from outside sources. This of course bore no fruit as no evidence of the stream was found anywhere and by all accounts, your initial performance was somewhat lacking due to your absence of villain points.” 

Toshinori was back to sitting next to him and held out a hand while smiling warmly, “you’re not in trouble, at least, we like to think you’re not. We just want to get a handle of why you have that device and what’s its purpose that requires you to bring it to the exam.”  

“Or why you felt it necessary to bring it along today that it distracted you from my random test.”  

 

‘ Well,’ he thought, ‘ I’ve already been entrusted with a secret by the major figures of UA, this will probably make them feel more at ease and less likely to walk on eggshells around me.’  

He unveiled his phone and laid it on the table. Nezu, realizing what this meant, plugged the phone into his projection monitor and displayed the screen on a hologram. They saw the latest back and forth from this morning and last evening. They scrolled back along the chat, activating the voice recordings and examining the pictures.  

“Wait, Midoriya, did you tell them about One for All?” Toshinori looked almost hurt, like a kicked Labrador, and it twisted up Midoriya’s insides. He wanted to come clean and revealing that he was loose with the secret of OfA was a hurdle he’d have to climb.  

“Yes All Might. But please, let me explain.” He was nervous again, scratch that, he was scared he had just blown his chances to attend UA and soured his relationship with All Might, forged over eight months of training and undone by his foolishness.  

“Midoriya... you have every right to pick and choose who you share your secrets with. The fact you have chosen to be honest with us shows a great deal of trust.” Midoriya blinked. Had a teacher just accepted his opinion, had actually listened to him?  
Granted Aldera, while not a cesspool like he’s heard about other schools in the country for awful teachers and thuggish classmates, wasn’t the haven he’d expect in the modern hero age. The teachers were neglectful, only doing the bare minimum to coral the bullying. Even before, when his teacher had blithely announced to the class he was entering UA heroics, should have realized who he was talking about in what type of environment. And while the pranking and harassment varied from light taunting to destruction of his property, it still left him wary of who he could trust and what they might say. 

The last time he had trusted so easily had been Kacchan and- ‘ Wait, no, the last time was when I joined the chat. How is it possible that in the span of three weeks I’ve placed more trust in complete strangers rather than my teachers or my friend?’  

  “To tell you the truth, this chat isn’t any ordinary chat. It’s a... I don’t know how to make it sound more believable... a multiversal communication group. And I know, I know, it sounds unrealistic and that I’m placing my trust in them without truly knowing their intent. But we’ve shared proof, we’ve been chatting for weeks and not information has leaked about anything. And, and, and-”  

All Might had buffed up and covered his mouth. “Woah there kid, slow down. There is an easy way to verify this. Principal?”  

“Indeed. Although we could critique your ease of distributing such a valuable secret to an online group, the fact you did your due diligence beforehand is commendable. Asking for photographic proof and having voice prints makes it easy for me to cross reference with the World Hero Organization database. An accumulation of information from across the globe of villains, vigilantes and syndicate groups acting against the heroes' best interests. Not to mention, determining if these pictures are the product of photo generation or AI.”  

 

The thought hadn’t even occurred to Midoriya that the people he was speaking were actually based in his world, had quirks, made up their stories and used technology or quirks to trick him. He felt all the more foolish when he considered the gravity of the secret of OfA and how easily he spilled it. He began to pant heavily as the realization started to panic him, All Might in turn laid a hand on his arm and knelt before him.  

“Stay with me Midoriya. You’re not in trouble. You’re in a safe space. Just keep your eyes on me, we’ll let Nezu sort this out. Everything's going to be okay.” he beamed wider than ever and ruffled his hair. And this made him smile, wobbly and tear streaked, but still relieved that All Might was here.  

---

Nezu turned from his screen, face grim and one hand stroking his chin. “Well to begin, the signal cannot be traced, which could mean protective VPNs that only the HPSC have access to. The images have been tracked to no discernible location bar parts of the United States west coast. No trace of malware, viruses, AI tracking or manipulation and nothing that seems to be altered by quirk cancellation frequencies though I wouldn’t rule it out. I’d say, Mr Midoriya, you may resume using the software on the proviso that you do not leak any information, including pictures and videos, about UA into the chat.”  

Midoriya stood from the chair and received his phone back, “Yes sir. Absolutely. I am so sorry for causing any problems and I swear, i will work hard to refine these powers.”  

“Very good. Now, Toshinori, please escort Midoriya to the Support section, it’s best we prepare for any quirk eventuality with right hero uniform and support gear.”  

“Understood. Let’s go young man, I have some ideas for how you can train.” The two left the office, leaving a concerned Nezu to ponder the copies he saved to a special hard drive.  
A section of the wall opened up to reveal Recovery Girl walking slowly over from a hidden elevator, “So then, what’s the next step to the investigation?” 

“To think I am still so transparent to you Chiyo. I best contact Sir Nighteye about this. There is a chance that this is a product of Quirk manipulation. He’s going to have a field day with young Midoriya if they ever meet.”  

“You’re normally quite hardline about outside interference during exams. Besides some clever workarounds like in the past. What changed your mind this time? Was it Midoriya being the inheritor of One for All?”  

“Nothing of the sort. I could tell that Midoriya was working entirely on instinct. And when you recovered the phone from Miss Uraraka, you were able to see its contents.”  

“No instances of cheating, prompting or leaks. Not even Uraraka looked through it, she must have thought it was private.”  

“Commendable though short sighted. A hero must examine all the evidence in surreal scenarios to determine the right course. No, Midoriya certainly displays an honest, willing desire to become a hero and work hard for it. The fact he didn’t conceal the chat  leads me to believe he is harbouring doubts about its legitimacy.”  

“Nezu... what if even Mirai doesn’t uncover evidence of a quirk or a conspiracy?”  

“Then we contact David Shield. If the means to contact parallel dimensions through a phone via an app is possible, then perhaps we can discover new possibilities for heroes to help.”  

“Just don’t say it like that in front of others, they’ll assume your plotting to take over the world again.”  

Nezu scoffed in incredulity and eyed the information again, “Nonsense Chiyo. Everyone should know that by now.”  

---

All Might and Midoriya had arrived at the support course doors, inside the sounds of drills and blow torches were echoing around. Third year early arrivals to aid in the development of first year equipment. Toshinori stood deflated next to his charge, "Well, I’ll leave you here to discuss the finer details. I’ll rush to Alpha gym to prepare a training course. Buuuuut, if I’m not there, assume that I’m responding to a crisis.”  

“All might, are you able to balance teaching me and helping Japan? You mentioned you had a time limit and then you... deflate.”  
All Might ruffled his hair and turned away, “Not to worry young man. I’ll have to manage teaching your classmates while making public appearances, though Nezu has made me promise to cut back. Just tell Mirai to guide you to Alpha and we’ll pick it up from there.” 

“All Might.” He paused mid-step and looked back at him, “Are you... upset with me? For revealing your secret so openly and quickly? I’m sorry. I let you down.”  

Toshinori sighed and expelled his buff state. He didn’t turn but kept looking at him. “You never told me much about how you felt.” Midoriya blinked and looked at him, “You always kept your chin up and head in your training. I assumed you were dedicated, to much to spend time with friends. But tell me truth. Did you have anyone to turn to, to trust? To be friends with?”  

Midoriya dipped his head. Toshinori nodded, “I won’t lecture you on the responsibilities of this quirk, by now you know it all. But I must impress that this never happens again, lest information spread about what we can do. I myself have made mistakes, as you saw when we first met, I discounted you immediately. You’ll never hear it in the press but I was actually quirkless too.” At this, Midoriya started and subconsciously he curled his fist. All Might noticed. “Yeah, I was a hypocrite. For that I apologise. But we know the value of not having strength and what comes when we are suddenly given it. I can’t take the quirk back and even if I could, I wouldn’t. Just, keep in mind that you are at the center of something much larger. So chin up, keep working.” He smiled and gave a thumbs up, “The next greatest hero can’t afford to buckle under maybes and what-ifs.”  

Midoriya smiled back and returned the thumbs up. He breathed deep, remembering Charlie’s instructions. ‘ Even if the circumstances change and they were in my world the whole time, I won’t forget the support and guidance they gave me.’ He walked to the door and prepared to open it. “Hey All Might, do you think we can practice combat training?”  

All Might smiled, “Sounds like a plan. Oh by the way, the staff are aware of the chat kerfuffle so they may start asking questions. Bye.”  

“Wait what?” He was already gone; the door had swung open, and he was pulled in by his lapel by a large metal claw. “Oh my God, It’s Power Loader! Oh sorry, didn’t mean to say the name in vain, amen.”  

“Woof, don’t tell me you’re one of those bible thumpers kid. Relax, this is the support department. You’ll be hearing far worse from those of your year.” A large spark of energy was expended followed by an explosion in the back of the lab, scalding a poor student. 
“OW! Shit that hurt like fuck.” 

“Head to the nurse. Recovery Girl is already working overtime. I’m not sure the lab can handle that many explosions. So, you’re the one who annihilated the Zero Pointer” He couldn’t tell because of the helmet if Power Loader was judging him or not. Best to err on the side of caution. 
“Erm, yes, Power Loader Sensei, I didn’t mean to lose control like that.” 

“Sorry? Failure is the mother of all invention. If I didn’t know what it could stand up to, I’d have never known the limits I could push past.”  

“Plus Ultra, huh?”  

“Plus Ultra. Even in support, we can still go beyond. I only had a couple hours but I gotta say, that is some wild power you're working with. Although, from what we've been told, that’s not your only ace in the hole.” Now Midoriya could defineitly tell he was being judged. At this he frowned. 
“I’m no cheater. That’s not the hero I want to be. If I got in, it’s because UA believes in that. If not, then I’m one of many cheaters welcomed here. QED” 

“Thus it is proven. Fair enough. I trust Nezu to make decisions like this all the time. If he has faith, then I have faith. Although, to tell the truth, I got a good laugh during Mic’s speech when that chat went off against those two loudmouths. Can you show me?”  

It was different now, knowing that potential information was leaked because he trusted too easily. He had to phrase this right. “Yeah, sure. Just keep in mind, it’s a live chat. So it depends on who’s there now. Generally, they’re busy doing their own thing but we get together to do a breakdown of our day.”  

“I got it. Let’s head to my office. Then we can have a look at the parameters of your quirk and prepare.”  

They sat in a steel plated workshop with a small desk next to a large filing cabnet that looked more like a safe. “I had to upgrade to steel plated when some students broke into my files and tried to change their grades. If only they put the effort into their actual designs. So, pop a squat, let’s see what we’re working with.”  

Midoriya laid out his phone again and it was projected onto a hologram once more. Only one person was active and she was livestreaming a buzz saw coming for her sternum. “Holy woah, Lucy, what’s happening!?”  

“I’m being dissected, what does it look like!?”  

---

Lucy  

Finally, after the ordeal of walking to borderline death by dehydration, witnessing Cooper’s attempts at a mercy killing and then being forced once more to deface a corpse, she had arrived at Coopers destination. Being sidetracked by bullshit will lengthen your journey, a lesson she thought she learned but apparently not enough. As when she tried to make a run for it, she was left short one finger and Cooper likewise, at each other's hands. Now she was bleary eyed, sluggish and suffering the worst headache since the time the flu spread around the Vault. She was so grateful her dad would take time out of his duties as Overseer to care for her, though she longed for the gentle care of her mother like when she was much younger.  

She barely heard Cooper speak into a microphone and only picked up that he was looking for vials. Vials of what, who cared? Now she was being led deeper into the store by the helpful Mr Handy to a clinic for her missing appendage. ‘ Did he eat it? My finger? He’s certainly not above eating his own kind. Dear God, am I travelling with a cannibal? How does Charlie deal with these people? Wait, these people, own kind! Oh fudge, am I racist?’  

 

“ So then madame, what can Snip-snip find for you?   Opening hours are between nine AM and seven PM. Though do keep in mind, there is a curfew. Don’t worry, though our troops fight on, General Atomics serves on. Why, it must have been only a week since the bombs dropped but that’s no excuse for the mess.” The cheery voice didn’t really appease her nerves, not in such a bleak, hollow environment. Super Duper Mart was featured in many of her stories growing up about living in a big city. They looked far livelier than this. She sat down and was treated with quick clean precision as a new finger was attached with only the slightest sting. ‘ Where was this guy earlier? Maybe he could have saved Wilzig or fought off that Gulper thing.’ It gnawed at her that she had let the head get away from her. That the Ghoul didn’t care for the Golden Rule. That the only people she could trust existed in another dimension where they couldn’t help her. She couldn’t understand what bee was in Cooper’s bonet when it came to talking to the chat, but he got huffy any time she was about to speak to them and proceeded to hogtie her when she managed one time. All this started after he asked her name, and he got that weird look on his face.  

“Thank you, that feels so much better.” As she flexed her finger, feeling it firmly attached, “You’ve already treated me kindlier than anyone in this place.”  

“No problem. Shall we find something more fitting to wear, perhaps some synthetic cotton blend. Nothing beats the weather back than Flimco Fibers except for black.”  

“That slogan sounds... problematic.”  

“The slogan is currently under a trial period until a suitable alternative can be found. Flimco marketing department should be back within the month.”  

“Well, at least you’re treating me with far better courtesy than that creature who took me here. I thought for sure I was here to be a sex slave. Jeepers, Angel Dust would have a field day with me.”  

At this, the robot recoiled, “How horrible, that’s not why you’re here at all. I’m simply going to harvest your organs.”  

Lucy was slowly regaining her faculties as this statement dawned on her and she realized “Hold up, run that by me again.” But all she got was a dart to the gut that made her remember ‘ I lost my syringer’ and she collapsed back.  

 

She barely recovered consciousness along the way, seeing a bunch of moronic drug peddlers direct the robot known as Snip-snip to extract her organs and return to deliver the vials to Cooper. If she had to guess, Cooper was barely hanging in there if they were taking this long to deliver the vials he needed. He looked in a sorry state last time she saw him. She blacked out again and awoke to a saw flying at her and Midoriya screaming from her Pip-boy. She kicked the blade away and pulled her arm against the cut restraint. Flipping to one side, she grabbed for a nearby defibrillator as it made another pass with its blade and cut into the gurney she was on. It lunged once more and she replied by slapping the pads on either side of the saw blade.  

 

With a blitz of electricity, the Mr. Handy was disabled on the floor, jibbering its catchphrase as it glitched and tried to reboot. Relieved, Lucy laid back on the gurney and dropped the defibrillators, in shock that she lived and more so that the defibrillators worked. “Okie Dokie, he’s dead. Or disabled. Just, give me a minute, get my heart under control.”  

 

Power Loader: Well whatever you do, don’t use those defibrillators. I mean, damn, how powerful are those things it can fry a robot?  

 

Shocked there was someone else in the chat, she recalled that both Midoriya and a mysterious voice were screaming out advice or support. Well, more help, the merrier. Lucy glanced at the casing of the portable defibrillator and read off the label, “Westec portable infantry Defibril-oh that makes sense.”  

 

Midoriya: What makes sense?  

 

“Westec were infamous for their unofficial slogan, power is priority. Basically, everything they built was super-charged, power armor, laser weapons, you name it, it would eat through power cells to give the biggest boom. The manuals are crazy to read. Their designs guzzle microfusion cells the more powerful the laser is.”  

 

Power Loader: Wait, they boosted the current but not the wattage? Well jeez, no wonder those cells burnt out after so little use.  

 

“Wait, are you saying laser weapons should work for longer?”  

 

Power Loader: YES! They’re energy sources, they’ll run out eventually but last much longer if you just use effective capacitors and a decent surge protector.  

 

Midoriya: Then it’s no wonder that the defibrillator was so powerful, if they copied that design mindset over to its military hardware.  

 

“Yeah, the mindset at the time was; fewer even bursts of slight charges and more a jumpstart with a single large blast. Gets the soldier up and running in the field in less than a second.”  

 

Power Loader: That would kill you after you’ve already been killed.  

 

Angel: Hey, I guess I was right, you really can be double dead. Yo Vaggie, ask around if anyone has gone to double hell?  

 

Vaggie: Angel piss off, we’re in the middle of something right now.  

Power Loader: Lucy, do you think- hey were did my sama suffix go?  

 

Midoriya: It’s part of a communication matrix, makes it easier to converse by translating.  

 

Emberlynn: Ew gross, fricken dubs!  

 

Charlie: Emberlynn, please focus up. Sorry guys, I’ll mute this until we need you, trying to rally the group.  

 

Charlie has signed out  

 

Power Loader: Anyway, do you think you can get that robot up to snuff?  

 

“Yeah, should be a quick fix but it’s not going to be as effective as before, I might have fired its circuits something fierce.”  

 

Power Loader: I’ll walk you through it, send me and Midoriya on a picture once you crack it open, I might have a few modifications to help you.  

 

Midoriya: I gotta say Mr Maijima, you’re taking the existence of sentient robots and laser weapons very calmly.  

 

Power Loader: I’m more annoyed at their inefficiency. Everyone pretty much has access to laser-based weaponry, and they suck! Who puts out a faulty product with the hope that the market will fix it in their own time? An asshole, that’s who. Fucking Detnerat.  

 

 

Meanwhile in Vault 31  

A little Brain Roomba wheeled around the near empty cryogenic storage for Buds buds, never straying too far from his consol in case Betty had something to report. Suddenly, it paused mid stride. “I don’t know why but I feel like I should sneeze.” It rotated to the left. It rotated to the right. “Initiating sneeze command. Execute: SNEEZE” It stayed there for a moment, “Why couldn’t I be a robobrain? Fucking RobCo.”  

 

Lucy  

Lucy lowered her gun, having just mowed down Martha mid leap and sat heavily next to Snip-snip who survived the ordeal by slicing multiple ghouls left and right like a dangerous juggling act with buzz saws. “Can I help with anything else mam?”  

She stared at it with disdain and turned back to the carnage.  

“No. No you can’t.”  

Luffy: Exceeept, he can. You should totally bring him along.  

 

“He tried to kill me and harvest my organs.”  

 

Midoriya: But he’s only programmed to do so, he doesn’t have any desire to hurt you.  

 

“Well actually, I have been programmed with the desire to harvest organs, it’s part of my computational processing.”  

 

Midoriya: You let me down man. I stood up for you and you let me down.  

 

“Wait, if I do go fiddling about in his head again, I could just limit one of his circuits to not attack me. I just need to upload a picture of me, and it will stop seeing me as a target.”  

 

Luffy: Plus, you’ll get a robot buddy.  

 

“Why are you obsessed with me having a robot companion?”  

 

Luffy: Because robots are cool. I read about them all the time in the newspaper funny’s.  

 

“And I read about them in the comics when the Silver Shroud fought the Mechanist. There’s a reason we didn’t have them in the Vault.”  

 

Midoriya: Think of it this way, you have an extra bit of back up while travelling the wasteland and someone to watch your back if that Ghoul comes looking for you.  

Lucy thought it over for a moment. She had planned to get as much gear as she could carry, to replace what she lost when Cooper tortured her. But extra backup was needed if it helped her find her dad and Moldaver wasn’t so compliant. Not to mention the Gulper was a pretty big obstacle. As a plus, having a medic to reattach limbs and someone to talk to would keep her from going feral.  

 

“Fine. FINE, I’ll reprogram the murder bot. But if Jeeves comes swinging at me once, I’m tossing the scrap heap into the nearest pit.”  

“Jeeves! Dear miss, I have a name via Snip-snip.” She wrenched open the back panel and was already poking at the circuit board labeled as brain on masking tape, no doubt by those brain-dead idiot junkies whenever they needed to fix up the Handy.  

“Yeah, well, this screwdriver says your name is now Jeeves.”  

“You really are the most devious bastard in New York CIIITYYYY” it shouted as the screw tightened and fizzled.  

“Huh, must be an old audio file.”  

Finished with her adjustments, she started to scavenge for any protection, armor or weapons to keep her alive. The vault suit was starting to lose its insulating properties and now she was really feeling the sweat build up. Unzipping the top, she decided to let her skin breathe a little, maybe even get some natural sunlight. Weapon holstered and Jeeves by her side, she took a picture to commemorate the occasion when she stopped letting the wasteland kick her butt.  

 

Nami: Hold on. You’re not just going out there like that are you?  

 

“I’m sorry, what do you mean? I got my armor, I’m armed, and I’ve got a robot protector.”  

 

Zoro: Do you have any water? Pretty sure you were complaining about that earlier. How about food. Anything canned will keep you going, barter for fresh foods.  

 

“Barter how? I don’t have any caps. For some reason they use bottle caps to buy things up here and all my water was canned.”  

 

Nami: Are you seriously leaving behind all that stuff behind you?  

Lucy turned to the table where the dealers once sat and found a heavy lock box sitting open. Inside she found a smorgasbord of opioids, pills, needles and any drug you could imagine. At first she wondered, “Why would I need this stuff, I’ll kill myself faster if I use any of this.”  

 

Nami: Don’t use it, trade it. That’s what those two morons were going to do. People want drugs, doesn’t matter if it’s the apocalypse.  

 

Midoriya: Wait a minute, you can’t perpetuate the flow of drugs, that could ruin people's lives. If you do this, you become a dealer.  

 

As much as she wanted to agree with him, she knew it was a desperate situation. She’s already had to mutilate a corpse, withstand torture and kill someone whose only crime was suffering from mental deterioration. She was grateful that Midoriya hadn’t condemned her for doing so but his moralizing in this scenario would get her killed.  

“I’m sorry Midoriya but they’re right. I can’t survive if I don’t eat. And besides, it will just be stolen by the next traveler who comes through here and sold to less scrupulous vendors. At least I can pick and choose who I want to sell to.”  

 

Midoriya: I understand. I don’t like it, but I want you to live more than I want you to be a paragon. In that case, make sure you pack some extra chemicals to treat ghouls, you can use them to trade or barter safe passage if they are showing signs of aggression.  

 

Nami: Thank you. The thief in me was dying seeing all that useful loot being left behind.  

 

Zoro: Spoils of war. You need to be doing this everywhere you go. Scavenge any house, any building, anything you come across. Take only the most useful stuff.  

 

Luffy: Plus, you now have a robot pal who’s fun to be with.  

 

Midoriya: And if it’s hostile?  

 

Luffy: Target practice.  

 

Nami: The fact you keep smiling when you say something like that somehow makes you look more psychotic than if Zoro said that while frowning.

Notes:

I'm splitting this into two parts due to the length and how much I have to write. Basically, a thought occurred to me, these people in the chats are always sharing personal secrets or dangerous information if it ever got out. Why does nobody ask where this chat came from. Is it part of some villains scheme using their quirk to spy on people? Is it magic used by enemy forces to undermine the heroes? Is it an AI generated service that lures people in with sob stories and memes?

Well, now the doubt is starting to creep in.

Chapter 10: No seriously, how have they survived this long?

Summary:

Doubts are rising as the characters are each challenged about their methods of doing things and their responsibilities in their own worlds.

 

Luffy  

He had a good feeling about Usopp. The man was great fun to talk to, and he could swear that he was reminded of someone just like him.  But now they had just started dinner. And what a feast it was, yet Kaya couldn’t touch any of it. She looked starved, Luffy thought, like she was on the verge of collapsing but being proper for guests was more important. He snuck the mini mushi under his hat and was listening in on what his other friends were doing. Poor Midoriya was getting chewed out by his mentor and someone else. Lucy was having a rough time with a super cool robot. If she could take the robot then she’d be more protected. Charlie sounded like she was barely holding together a group of very wacky people. He hoped to see their picture soon, especially if they were as cool looking as Angel and Husk.  

Dressed to the nines and shmoozing with his new best friend, they were-is that a goat man? And hors d'oeuvres? He couldn’t miss these bad boys. While he and Usopp picked the plate clean, Nami decided to chat up Merry and Zoro contented himself with drinking whatever drinks he could find. A man after his own heart. FInally the feast could begin when Kaya was escorted by her butler Klahador downstairs.  

“Hey Zoro, you coming?” asked Luffy and Usopp  

Zoro looked up from his drink to see Klahador standing by the steps and Kaya complimenting Nami on her choice of dress, that same look on her face whenever someone brings up their mothers, he guessed Kaya must have brought it up.  

“Hey, that butler seem weird to you? Like, bad vibes or something?”  

“Oh that’s Klahador, yeah, all the time. He’s been Kaya’s butler since her parents, um, passed away.”  

“I mean, he just looks evil right?”  

Klahador, meanwhile, was ignoring their banter while managing Kaya around the guests. Inwardly, he was thinking, “ THEY ARE SO FUCKING ONTO US!”  

---

As they made their way in though, Nami rested a hand on his shoulder.  

“If you carrying that snail everywhere, someone is eventually going to take it.”  

Luffy smiled knowingly, “That’s OK, I trust you with it.”  

Nami’s eyes widened marginally before huffing slightly and walking away. He of course knew she stole the den den mushii from him, his head felt a little lighter. Well, lighter than usual. That was why she was on his crew, he needed a great thief. And a navigator. Good thing she brought them here, her skills were already paying off with them getting a free meal.  

Then again, Makino always said there’s no such thing as a free meal.  

The meal eventually devolved into a soapbox moment for Luffy when he pronounced his ambition to become king of the pirates and Kaya even looked like she was being won over by his enthusiasm. Until...  

 

“That’s enough. It’s bad enough that Miss Kaya suffers Usopp’s delusions while she is ill, but to bring riff-raff pirates here as well and putting her life in danger. I will see you no longer interfere in our lives here. Leave!”  

 

For moment, nobody moved, Kaya tried protesting as she reached for something to soothe her cough, which Klahador immediately arrived by her side to provide her special tea like always.  

 

Vi: You’re evil, aren’t you?  

 

“Who said that? Which one of you said that?” Klahador rounded on the assembly, furious at the accusation. Luffy, Zoro and Usopp each pointed at the same time at Nami. “Really guys?” 
“If you have something to say about my methods, please kindly, keep it to yourself, pirate.” 

Kaya, had had enough, “Her name is Nami, Klahador, and please stop yelling at my new friends on my birthday.”  

Klahador bowed and retreated, though maintained his sneer while looking at Nami. She rolled her eyes at his attempt at intimidation and unfurled the Den Den Mushii from up her sleeve, “I think this is the culprit you’re looking for.”  

For the first time, Sham and Buushi, seemed interested as they leaned in closer, while Klahador seemed to pale slightly at the sight of a transponder snail. Kaya seemed enthralled to see something so unique given it’s small size, mirrored eyes and integrated speaker grill. The whole thing looked to be made of living metal.  

“Incredible, what is it?”  

Nami fumbled for a moment and stuttered out, “A special... prank snail. UhhhUsopp showed it to me earlier.”  

Usopp, seeing the suble cue of her eyes flicking to him, responded quickly, “That’s right, to super dandy Transponder Fail. It records voices and plays them back later at the push of a button. Brand new.”  

Klahador eyed the device greedily and suddenly came up with a solution to the problem of its presence, “I seem to have underestimated you Usopp, to provide not only guests, though questionable their company may be, but to also provide Miss Kaya with a birthday present.”  

Luffy stood to protest but Nami quickly stood as well to grab him by the shoulder while holding out the snail across the table for Usopp to take. “Of course Usopp snuck this to me when he didn’t want you to find out your surprise but Usopp I think you should give it to her directly.” Kaya beamed excitedly at Usopps attention being on her and Nami reluctantly sat down whispering to Luffy. “Just roll with it for now.”  

Kaya recieved the snail with as much delicacy her constitution allowed and gleamed reverently at Ussop, “Oh Usopp, first a giant pearl ”, she smiled knowingly at him and he chuckled nervously, “and now this. The fact that you remember and spoil me so is all the presents I need.”  

Luffy piped up, “It is? Then in that case, would you mind giving us-”  

“A bed for tonight.” Nami jumped in, “Long journey ahead, and today, lots of long journeys. If you wouldn’t mind.”  

“Of course not, Klahador, please prepare some rooms for our guests. We have so many, it’s wasteful not to let my friends rest for at least one night.”  

“One night indeed, Miss Kaya, but they must be gone by morning.”  

The rest of the crew flopped back into their seats, puzzling over how to get the snail back.  

 

Vi: Oh son of a bitch.  

  Kaya covered her mouth to stifle a bark of laughter, while Klahador looked appalled at the device, “I think I may need to remove some of the naughty language though.”  

  Back in the foyer, where Merry again tried to speak to Kaya but was brushed off by Klahador. Luffy tried to follow after but was halted again by Nami while Usopp directed Zoro to the kitchen for some extra bottle of booze.  

“Nami, you gave away part of our crew.”  

“Look, I’m sorry, that butler sets me on edge, especially if Zoro knows him, last thing we need is him thinking we have a way contact people if he’s up to something. And why are you smiling?”  

He was smiling, grinning connivingly, “You didn’t correct me when I said our crew.”  

Nami blinked, then blanched, before swatting him on his arm, “Can you focus.”  

“You know, if Charlie heard that, she’d be singing for joy that we made a breakthrough,”  

“Well then maybe it’s a good thing I got rid of it. Don’t you think it’s weird that you found a den den mushii that supposedly lets you speak to peopl in another dimension.”  

“How else do you explain it?”  

“Easily, actually, like maybe the Navy sends them out to keep track of pirates and sets up pirates to be arrested by having agents pose as their friends. The World Government has eight Cypher Pol agencies, I’m sure some of them are bored.”  

“It’s part of our crew. I trust them.” 
“Just because you trusted us and we have to go along with you because we might die if we don’t, doesn’t mean it works the same way over the snail.” 

“You’d be surprised. I mean, we’ve gotten this far, and the marines still haven’t found us.”  

Nami sighed in frustration, knowing that the opportunity to rest and maybe swipe some swag would be out the window if Luffy went after the snail himself, “Fine, I can sneak it back, but we have to leave early if we want to be undetected.”  

“But we’ll miss breakfast!” Luffy complained, “and I’ll miss out on convincing Kaya to give us the Merry.”  

“Somehow, you manage to come up with all the most unlikely to succeed scenarios when you plan. Leave it to me, I'm an excellent thief, remember.”  

---

Vi  

OK, being carted off with a bag on her head was not her idea of winging it. Granted, she knew one thing for certain, this wasn’t Silco. His black bag operation extended to finding the guy, bagging them in an alley and dragging them to the pier to be shot. He didn’t keep prisoners, especially not ones that might upset his hold over her now manic sister. ‘ Had she always been manic?’, it was an uncomfortable though. She didn’t remember any moment where she was acting up. ‘Except for when-, Vander, when she-’ it was getting harder to think about. No matter what hackneyed therapy Charlie thought she could pull off, whatever ethics lesson Lucy tried to push or whatever hero speech Midoriya was spewing, she would get there in her own time. At least Luffy got it. He was the only one who would go with the flow. They shared a braincell between them, fuck whoever else called them dumb. Intelligence didn’t let her survive all these years; strength did.  

‘Except for Cait. She was smart. Damn smart. She pulled my ass out of the fire with Sevika and Silco. But I can’t...’ of course she felt a little jealous of Powder. She could build anything she wanted. It didn’t always work. But she tried. She tried to lead. She tried to be tough. When they traded positions, they screwed up. Powder wasn’t tough, that was why she lost the loot that day. She wasn’t smart, that’s why trying to talk it out led to an ass beating. Why it led to her dragging Mylo and Claggor into Silco’s den and they thought they were so smart.  

‘What was Silco even going to do with Vander? Fuck, trying to understand a psycho won’t give me answers.’  

Bang. A flash of sunlight hits her in the eye as the bag is ripped from her head. “And I’m blind. Thank you for that.”  

A grunt. She spots sitting the shadow of the room was the masked leader of the posse that abducted her and Cait. Five seconds from convincing Powder to come with her, and this tool had to come and wreck everything. Whoever HE was. Or She. Or they. ‘ Dammit dude, take of the mask. Wait, I'm not gagged anymore.’  

“ Dammit dude, take off the mask. Or are you that ugly?”  

The figure moved to stand, weapon in hand and a brass/glass tube in the other. “You usually like to grill people a bit more before you start talking.” he hooked his weapon over his shoulder and reached his free hand up to his face. It pulled away and dangled from a cord on his belt, while he pulled down the hood to reveal his white dreadlocks. “You look healthy for a dead girl.” He pulled up the tube and twisted a dial. “What do you know about this?”  

“Who gives a shit!” she pulled her arms apart and tore the rope. Ekko backed up as she advanced but stopped when she threw her arms around him. “I’m so glad you’re okay Little Man.” He stiffened in the embrace, unwilling, read unable, to return it. He pulled out but she held firm.  

“This interrogation isn’t going to work if you got me in a nelson.”  

“It’s called a hug.”  

“Since when do you hug?”  

She released him and stood back, “Since when did you get the balls?” she looked over him and saw he was tall, lean and face marred by a sneer. He was her height now. ‘ When did that happen?’  

“When Jinx happened.” He sighed and pulled the tube with him. He stared into the fluctuating energy with derision. “Let me be straight. Are you with Silco or the Piltie’s?”  

“Woah, neither. I never would. You know what he did to me. What they did to me.”  

“Then why are you walking the narrows with Piltie enforcer by your side and talking into hextech tablet? Those are top of the line, yet to be released and you’re wandering the streets without a care in the world.”  

“Were you following me? Why didn’t you say anything?”  

“I couldn’t trust you hadn’t been compromised. Seven years and you show back up, talking to someone with this thing.” He held up her hextech tablet and she patted her pockets.  

“Right. So I was just wandering around, leaping from roof to roof and beating up Silco’s enforcers but sure, I’m working in the shadows for him.”  

“It’s basic undercover work. Establish a cover, keep in contact with upstairs. I haven’t been able to crack this yet so it must be hi-tech Talis.”  

“I’m telling you... look, it’s going to be hard to believe me, but that thing in your hand, it lets me talk to random people. I don’t know why I was put in contact with them but they are helping me. They led me to Powder and I almost got her to stand down when your punks rushed in and spooked her.”  

“So you know nothing about this” he gestured to the tube.  

“Nothing. I just came looking for Powder.”  

“It’s Jinx now.”  

“Bullshit. I saw her, I looked into her eyes, I held her, spoke to her. Powder isn’t dead.”  

“I wish I met that version then. Did you hit your head wherever you were?”  

“Stillwater. And I woke up like a week ago and found that in my cell. They, sigh, they’re from another dimension.” she paused for his reaction, him to burst out laughing or call her a liar. But he just stared at her incredulously.  

“By all the spirits. They got to you, you just don’t know it.” He turned and marched out the room, Vi trailing behind him as he passed by his Bat-Human henchman to fetch his hoverboard. HE was about to kick off when Vi caught his arm.  

“What gives?”  

“You’re compromised. I don’t know what hidden secrets Piltover is trying to hide but if they can use hex tech, they can probably scramble your mind. Seven years of it and they can make you think how they want. We don’t know. But you end up with advance communication technology, talking to people you don’t know and just so happen to run into Silco and Pow-Jinx. I don’t buy it.”  

He began to take off when an alert came through on the device and gave a slight shock to his arm. He recoiled and dropped it. Vi picked it up and showed it to him. Don’t believe me, fine, I get it. But look at this shit. Do you honestly think Silco or the Enforcers took the time build all this? To fake this?” He stared at footage of people throwing impossible punches, barren wasteland, robotics, what looked like pirates and some metropolis that looked like a fusion of Piltover and the Underground.  

It was elaborate, he could admit that, even the plan was ripe for mistakes. Not to mention Vi openly talking into this thing and giving herself away. It led him right...to...her...  

“It’s us. Piltover is after us. Don't you see?” Vi raised a questioning brow at him and his bodyguard looked equally skeptical, “You make a lot of noise, and we find you, bring you back here with a communicator beyond anything we’ve seen. How do we know it's not tracking you. You’ve seen how Silco works. He's got his fingers in everything, Enforcers, shimmer, the whole underground is in his pocket. We are all that stands in his way.”  

Okay, she could admit that sounded more plausible than being a sleeper agent. A bunch of crazy people who she just so happened to be put in contact with. Something stank here. She didn’t want to turn her back on people who tried to help her, who went out of their way to help her sister, who by Cait's account was wanted as a terrorist and she wasn’t snatched as soon as she found her. It was too much.  

Ekko, realizing the strain of all this, relented and stood down. He guided her away from the gathering Firelights and said, “Look, it’s highly unlikely they have the means to track you down with this. I just want you to consider maybe it’s not in your best interest to talk to these people anymore. Especially not now, after everything we’ve built.”  

He guided her to an open space that had sprouted the largest tree Vi had ever seen. It was sprawling, taller than some of the most opulent Piltover penthouses and outfitted with homes for people to live in and fly around from. Laughter filled the air and people, for the first time since she was freed, looked content. Happy. Free.   

‘ Is this what Luffy was talking about, when he spoke about freedom? Freedom to pursue happiness. Man, he is good. Doesn’t even have to say anything and he’s corrupted me.’ She paused mid-step, realizing what she just thought. But continued onward until she saw something that sparked pure joy in her heart.   

  A mural, detailed and bright, depicting everyone, Vander, Mylo, Claggor, Benzo, even Powder as she remembered. Small, scrappy and totally clueless.   

“When Silco took over, this was the only place we had left. And if a seed could thrive, then so could we.”  

“I should’ve been there. To help you.”  

“I know I’m not helping you with my conspiracies, but that way of thinking is a sure way to drive you crazy” he stopped but continued, “Powder is gone Vi. None of us can bring her back. If I had gone with you, maybe I could have changed things slightly.”  

“Or you could’ve gotten yourself killed. Or worse. I always do this, rush in without thinking. Gosh, Midoriya’s right, I need to plan ahead better.”  

“Then will you think about leaving Jinx behind. You could do a lot to help dopwn here.”  

“You said you tried. Back there, you said you tried to help her. How?”  

He gazed out at the smiling happy kids, the buzzing firelights and a hoverboard in use.  

“I remember that day.”  

---

Four years ago  

Ekko was flying fast, flying dangerous. He was skimming the rooftops of the Lanes, edging closer to Silco’s office in the Final drop. There he would find Powder. It took some scrounging, but eventually he uncovered her location. Right in the grips of the man who killed her father. So many close shaves, so many evasions down dark alleys where he slid down the very sewage drains Vi and the crew had done before to escape patrols. Now he stood at the cusp of her rescue. His precious Powder. The last vestige of a pre-Silco world.  

He cracked the window open and saw her there, sitting on Silco’s desk, a mini monkey bomb in her lap. She never was able to get them to work. As she fiddled, it didn’t seem as though she heard him, until he reached out for her shoulder and...  

“You finally come.” she turned and stared at him. She was braided on one side, a remainder of her old style but grown out on the other side. Her eyes though, they were hollow, sunken depths without any comprehension.  

 

She didn’t recognize him.  

 

“I’ve come to rescue you.”  

 

Flickers of understanding emerged and she stood up slowly.  

 

“I don’t want to be rescued.”  

 

“Powder.”  

 

“Jinx.”  

 

He reahced out again. She stepped into his space and slapped him. As he fell back and the sound of footsteps began rushing up steps outside the office, he thought he saw her cradle her hand, staring at it then the mark on his face in horror. But before he could do anything else, the door burst in, Sevika was armed and ready with two towering grunts following behind. Jinx slid in next to them and glared at him.  

 

He leapt from the window and didn't look back.  

---

 

“She had an out Vi. I gave her an out, back when maybe Silco didn’t have his claws in her yet, not completely, and she spat on it. Maybe you saw an echo of that but that’s all it was, an echo.”  

“Yeah... that’s all you are...” he didn’t react beyond a clench of his fists around the railing.  

“We lose people all the time Vi. The price of our freedom was people like Vander and Benzo. To Silco. And Enforcers.”  

“You can trust Cait. I don’t know how to explain it, but she is one of those rare types of people that I only hear about. She wants to help people because it’s right.”  

“you’ve known her four days. Since when were you so quick to trust.”  

“I met the right people.”  

---

Back in the cell, Cait was released from her bonds and Vi went forward with an offer of water. The bag was removed, and she blinked the light away to see Vi’s face right before her. She blushed at the closeness and saw the bowl in her hands. She took it from her and drank.  

“Water is hard to come by down here. Especially fresh drinking water. But Vi says I can trust you.”  

They adjourned to the public space and Cait marveled at the nature around her. “It’s incredible what your people have been able to build.”  

“My people should be your people too. If not for the council, who would have torn this place apart.”  

“Yeah, you racist.” Vi interjected with a smirk. Ekko was taken aback while Cait smirked back.  

“Says you, you damn Imperialist.”  

“I feel like I’m out of the loop and that’s not fair” Ekko interrupted, “I can get you back to the surface but that’s it. Because this stays with me.”  

“The Hex crystal! You got it.” she looked somewhat ashamed when Vi stared at her.  

“Fucking knew it. You were using me,”  

“And you were using me or was looking for your sister a happy coincidence.”  

“Both of you used each other. Get over it. But with this, we can even the playing field.”  

“No, that’s not the answer. Violence begets violence.”  

“Easy for you to say. We’ve been down here scraping by while hunted from all sides. Silco pays off the Enforcers and you turn a blind eye to our suffering.”  

“OF COURSER I DO!” she barked, stunning the two of them, “It’s funny what you see when you have an extra set of eyes to guide you and people to talk to. I didn’t wish to see, but Silco covering everything up is what led me to here.”  

“And we can use that gem to make a difference. Ekko, Caitlyn has an in with the council. But more than that, if he’s as smart as you say he is, then this guy can be the key to understanding what this chat device is.”  

“You still believe it’s some mystical shit?” he asked.  

“I do” said Cait, “and more than that, it’s a gateway to new understanding. Before I saw this device, I was sure that Piltover was still the key to prosperity. But so many ideas have opened up because of this hex tablet.”  

“Get us to the bridge and we can convince this Talis guy to help the lanes.”  

“On one condition, I go with you and tell him myself.”  

The two looked at one another and shrugged, “That’s fair.”  

“You two are weirdly in synch.”  

“Blame it on the tablet. Let’s see what’s on the tube.” She brought up the screen to see what was happening. It looked like a disaster.  

“What the hell are those things?”  

“Exactly that. Hell.”  

---

Charlie  

It started with introductions. Each sinner was assigned to them by four Overlords; the others had decided to err on the side of Switzerland and wait out what the result was. Going by today's session, they would not be impressed.  

“Okay everyone, so... sorry about that little debacle with Show and Tell and Angel showing us one of his... unique pieces of work." Husk let out a bark of laughter to Angels consternation, "so let's start by introducing ourselves and our respective sponsor.” Charlie said as she paced in front of the assembled audience in the foyer.  

“Sponsor. Pretty safe word to use instead of Slaver.” a bitter spotted Hyena sat slouched with arms crossed glaring at everyone else in the room.  

“Well, let’s try not to use too negative language. I mean, we are in Hell. Chances are you’re going to hear that enough just walking through the street. Think of this as a reprieve from all the negativity.” This line of thought seemed to appeal to everyone, even if they didn’t vocalize it.  

“Very well, perhaps I will make a start of-”  

“My name is Emberlynn, I love anime, manga, doujin, I’m like, a total weeaboo and I was sent here by Zeezi, She is totes cute.”  

Charlie was caught off guard and wondering just what the hell she was saying. She wished she had Midoriya on call to translate these Japanese terms. ‘ At the very least, at least we have a variety of scholars staying here. ’  

Baxter ground his teeth in frustration before resuming, “As I was saying, my name is-”  

“Greetings, I am Loopty Goopty, inventor extraordinaire.”  

“And I am Lyle Lipton, genius innovator for the Trillionaire class. We were sent here by our wonderful benefactor Rosie.”  

“I sssay. Inventorssss, how marvelousss. If I may, I would love to pick your brains when it comes to developing brand weapons of mass destruction.”  

Charlie leaped to place an arm between Pentious and the inventor duo, conveniently blocking them from Baxter’s seething, “Now, now, Pentious, what did we say about your inventions?”  

Pentious rolled his eyes, exasperated, “No inventions involving maiming, mutilation, murder or manslaughter and I get to keep my Egg Boiis. Yesss, miss Charlie.”  

Baxter simmered down enough to straighten his lab coat out, “Now then, my name-” 
 

“ROSIE! How marvelous that she’s reaching out to different varieties of souls. For a while there, I thought she was only focused on cannibals in particular.” Alastor had manifested right in the middle of the parlor next to Charlie who beamed with happiness that her business partner was taking an active role in the redemption process.  

“Cannibals indoodily! Why, there is no greater cannibal than the upper crust eating away all the poor's resources required to live.” Loopty proclaimed, as he and Lyle cackled madly.  
The rest seemed to grimace at such a blatant social evil. 

“I thought we were supposed to eat the rich?” retorted the sullen hyena.  
She was curled up in an armchair away from the rest. She was subtly reaching for the beer bottle in front of Husk who snatched it out of her reach without looking. Snarling, she huffed and returned to the group staring expectantly at her.  

Except Baxter who was now heavily breathing.  

“Might as well get it over with kid. Princess over there has more patience than Belphegor.”  

“Ugh, fine, I’m Crymini. I don’t want to be here, but I was told to come here by Carmilla to pay off my debts. So yeah, I’m practically a test subject putting my life on the line for something so pointless.”  

“Come on guys, I know it seems daunting, but you can’t come into this thinking it's pointless and give up before even trying. If you put in the effort, you’ll get out what you put in.” She was about to go on but was interrupted.  

“Actually, Crymini presents a fascinating opportunity for my own research.  For you see, I am in the midst of my own research-”  

Charlie gasped and got into a crouch to talk to him, “Another inventor. First Pentious, then Loopty and Lyle. Ooh, this is sooo exciting. Soon we’ll have enough to launch our own invention company.”  

Baxter shoved her away by her face and snarled, “I am no mere inventor like that slithering imbecile or those eccentric oligarchs.”  

“That was a compliment.” Lyle chirped.  

“Not for me it wasn’t.” Pentious bemoaned.  

“I am a scientist. In fact, I am one of Zestial primary researchers, specially requested to embark on this scientific expedition. I AM-”  

“-so fucking tired. Why can’t Val book me in for an evening shift so I can sleep in? Ugh, grab me a whiskey there whiskers, I’m looking to not feel anything below my waist.”  

“OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE! BAXTER. I AM BAXTER. MY NAME IS BAXTER!” He roared and heaved deep breaths while the assembly looked at him in concern.  

“Yeah, make that whiskey to go, I’m outtie.” Angel Dust had adorned some pink heart lens glasses and was making for the exit.  

“Wait, Angel, we’re introducing our new guests to the hotel, they need to get to know the other guests if we are going to be working together.”  

“Charle's, first thing, I’m pretty sure our little show and tell gave them a decent idea of what I’m about. Second, I may live here but I still got a job to do.”  

Crymini seemed to perk up at that, “Do you mind taking me with you, literally anything would be better than this?”  

Angel was thunderstruck by her request and looked especially queasy at her enthusiasm, “Er, no. It’s not exactly my decision,” he schooled his features to be more aloof, if a little urgent, “but honestly, you could do worse than hang around here. My place ain’t nothing special.”  

“Idea time,” Charlie piped in, “what if we went to your place of work Angel, it would make for a great introduction to your-”  

“CHARLIE!” He grabbed her by the shoulders, which raised Vaggie’s hackles, “This ain’t no daytrip or fieldtrip or whatever you wanna call it. Don’t come to my workplace and don’t think you can convince my boss to let me off early. He ain’t the type to give up what he owns.”  

Crymini seemed to recede back into herself again as Husk stood up.  

“Yeah, can’t go and taint the exclusiveness of a porn studio. Last thing we need to do is make everyone thin it was trashy.”  

“Hey, fuck off dude, I make classy art for millions of viewers in all seven rings. Don’t come after me because you got stuck serving drinks to people like me.”  

“People like you, you’re a dime a dozen. A dive bar regular, a walk of shame waiting to happen.”  

“Ain’t no shame in my walk. I can make the catwalk purr, if you know what I mean.”  

“No means no asshole.”  

“Don’t talk to me about no means no, I-” he stopped and grabbed his phone as soon as it started ringing, nervously he picked it up and made his way to the exit, throwing the middle finger over his shoulder on his way out.  

“Well... I guess we've met everyone. Let's take five people, Nifty will point you to your rooms and Husk and I will bring up your bags.” Vaggie barked out, dispersing the group immediately. Except for Emberlynn and Baxter.  

“So, on the DL, Some of my stuff is like super rare. I don’t really want anyone touching it, so if you could just leave me the key, I'll take care of it myself.”  

Baxter, wary of her predilections, edged around her, “Likewise, I will handle my equipment at my own pace, therefore I will require fifteen minutes to establish my abode. Ample square feet will be required.”  

Charlie zoned out from the rest of the group, all of them retiring to their rooms and the mood chilled by Angels quick exit. She wished she could call up the chat and talk to someone, but they were each busy or in some peril that she was trying to not think about.  

That’s when the idea hit her. A group chat for the Hazbin Hotel. She had pretty much given up on correcting even herself at this point. ‘ Maybe the HH chat- no, wait, that sounds like those jackasses who egged the hotel last month. It’s like Hell brings out the worst in people but down here those neo-nazi's are just a bunch of chumps.’  

Hazbin Hotel chat would do. First things first, get Angel into the group. Thankfully she already had his phone number. Then she added the rest of the staff. Then she added the new guests. THe chat was already helping improve her mood, between Vaggie being supportive and the chat giving her some positive feedback, her mood had never been better.  

‘ Huh, that’s weird, Angel's phone number isn’t working. DId he give me another burner number?! I know, if I go there, I can not only get his real number, maybe we can get a group live stream going. A real show and tell to get to know each other. It stops people from feeling too awkward if they aren’t in the same room. Brilliant’  

So, she switched on her live feed and began her into to the rest of the crew. Vaggie was in the middle of carrying Crymini’s miniscule number of belongings when the two of them received the alert.  

“Chica, what are you doing now?” she asked fondly. That fondness drained when she saw Charlie teleport via flames and her background changed into the outside of the Vee’s headquarters. “Mierda, what is doing?”  

“Holy crap, she’s sticking her dick in places where she doesn’t need to. LAst thing she wants is to be on the bad side of the Vee’s!” Crymini looked shocked that Charlie would be doing something so foolish.  

They watched as she meandered among the cast and crew of Valentino’s latest porn shoot. How Angel came out to stop her and tell her they were busy. Until Valention made an appearance.  

 

Valentino: Ah, Princessa, welcome to my, Love Dungeon.  

 

Charlie: Oh, why, thank youuuuuueeewwwww, no thank you.  

 

Vaggie features sharpened with hate as she saw her love being licked by Valentino, so much so that Crymini backed away in fear she would explode.  

 

Valentino: So, what can I do for such a delicate, little flower like yourself? Care for a role in my upcoming porn parody of the latest Extermination, Ass-Exterminators 205.  

 

Charlie: Fuck that right off... I mean, I was just coming here to aid Angel in the process of his redemption by using my live stream to link all of my new residents into a group show and tell. Maybe see where the magic happens and get to know each other.  

 

Valentino: Oh yeah, I heard all about your little excursion to the Overlords from my partner Velvette. I could swear she was almost crying when I last saw her.  

 

Charlie: Oh gosh, I am so sorry. It wasn’t my intention to stir up any more bad blood between us.  

 

Valentino: Oh believe me, I had a great time. That was the longest I've laughed in a long time. Last time was when one of the fluffers got blinded by a stray shot from one of my stars and stumbled head first into a light. Poor little bastard was fried.  

Charlie: I’m so sorry to hear that.  

 

Valentino: Don’t be, he came into work the next day. What a trooper, there he is, over there. Hey, Spunky Bruster, over here.  

 

Buster: It’s Buster, boss...  

 

Charlie: Anyway, I was wondering if I could sit in on this, last thing I want is to eat into your time.  

 

Vaggie and Crymini released a breath of relief that Charlie hadn’t escalated anything else. They returned to watching as Charlie scanned the set, spoke to individual crew members, including poor Buster, and generally disrupted the entire shoot with suggestions and interruptions. They saw Valentino get increasingly incensed but unable to do anything to retaliate against the Princess of Hell. That just meant any time Charlie had Angel on camera, she could see how much more nervous he was. She turned and bolted for the exit, silently begging Charlie not to do anything stupid before she got there. ‘ Times like these, I wish I still had my wings.’  

She finally arrived at the studio in time to see the cast and crew gathered around the door to Angel’s dressing room, which flew open as Valentino was launched through the door and smashed into a light fixture, eye blackened with a strong right. Back inside the room, Charlie’s demonic visage took up the entire doorway, eyes glowing red and hair flying around her in whisps while her horns protruded right through the door.  

A normally arousing sight any other time she saw it, this time Vaggie was terrified that Charlie had just got them wrapped up in a civil war.  

“CHARLIE, STOP! You made things worse.” Angel clawed at her, spinning her around to yell into her face.  

Charlie finally calmed down enough to realise what happened, “Angel, he was hitting you. You don’t deserve that, I was only trying to help.”  

“By getting in my way? By disrupting me at work? You humiliated me by filming me. Nobody knows Angel Dust behind the scenes they only see me when I'm working. You want to help me now, GET THE FUCK OUT!”  

Vaggie swept over to them, handling Charlie and guiding her towards the exit as she started panicking and stuttering apologies. Angel only glared back. She would have words with him about being so up in her face about this but for now, she saw him give them an out. She passed by Buster holding Charlie’s phone and snatched it out of his hands. She must have dropped it when Angel and Valention disappeared into the dressing room, but it was still streaming, including the punch and Charlie now crying in Vaggie’s arms. She shut it off and ran the two of them out of the building. Charlie looked back to see Valentino straightening himself out, sporting a black eye but still smiling.  

---

  Hours later Charlie sat at the bar alone, head in her arms and silently weeping. She had come so close and fallen so far in just two days. Angel wouldn’t come back, and the rest didn’t trust her enough to stay.  

‘ They’ll go back to their masters, because Crymini is right that’s what they are, and give them the run down on what a shitshow this whole thing was’ s he pondered her actions and the chats advice, yet none of it really stuck, ‘ How does Midoriya remain so optimistic even when he’s broken? How does Lucy stick so close to her morals when the world is begging her to be a killer? How do Lucy and Vi remain so determined when every failure punches them in the face yet they keep getting up for more?’  

 

“Hey Princes-Charlie...” she pulled herself up to see Husk poshing a glass. He took particular delight in polishing the glassware, even when nobody drinks anything that day. Was it stimming? She read about it somewhere that it was a natural behavior used to regulate emotions and process information.  
But her musing was interrupted by Husk setting the glass down heavily. “Charlie. I don’t always practice what I preach but as a bartender and a gambling man, I tended to pick up on things. I made mistakes when it comes to this, so I might as well tell you now so you can learn from today's mistake too. You don’t always have to talk.” 

“Huh?” she was coming up short when it came to understanding him. The two barely talked outside of her asking him to participate and lay off on talking down to the rest.  

“You think that helping people means giving them platitudes, empty praise and encouragement. Telling them what they want to hear will change them. And yeah, it might. For a while. But sooner or later they’re going to have to hear the ugly truth.”  

“That they’re worthless. Doomed sinners condemned to a second death at the hands of the Exorcists all because of the choices they made in life.”  

“Maybe, yes. Oh, quit the pathos, Princess. There’s a reason people go the medical school for this, why they spend years researching and preparing. Because even the most prepared shrink isn’t ready to hear what some people have to say.”  

“I didn’t know what Angel's life was like in the studio. Or maybe I did know but I didn’t want to confirm it. Then I went and made it all about him. I barely got to talk to the rest of them.”  

“Eh, honestly, I think they were relieved. That creep in the chat was right about comparing this to Alcoholics anonymous. Believe me, I tried everything when I was alive to get off the sauce. But nothing made me clam up more than being forced to admit I had a problem.”  

“I’m supposed to be here to guide you guys.”  

“But a guide doesn’t always have to explain the sights. Sometimes they just need to lead the group along the trail and let them take it all in. Sometimes, you need to listen.”  

“Listen.” she contemplated it for a moment. Of course it made sense. Hearing their problem was the way forward to solving their problem. But she was only one person. She couldn’t solve all their problems for all of them. “Sometimes, they need to solve things by themselves.”  

“And they’re not always going to get it right. That’s where you come in. As a bartender, I listened to the boozers tell me their woes. It was in one ear, out the other, but they certainly felt a little lighter getting it off their chest. As a dealer, I knew when to egg 'em on, have a good time and make sure the house always won. But I also knew when to send them packing. Because a desperate man will do anything to get out of the hole. Believe me, I know. But the man with a little change in their pocket, that’s hope.”  

“Just sit and listen. It’s so simple but it’s so effective.”  

“You’d be surprised what just listening to these assholes will tell you about them and how to help. I’m not really in the business of helping. A bartender's daily bread are the depressed losers who come for a quick and easy escape. That’ll keep them here.”  

“Provided Alastor keeps the bar stocked with top shelf stuff.”  

“Yeah, you got a way of sweettalking him, somehow.”   

“But I’m what makes them stay. Come for the free booze, stay for the free therapy.”  

“It’s an effective business model. Booze will stop being sold if they either get sober or they die. Neither one leaves me with a stable business. But if they learn restraint, routine, control.”  

Charlie stood up and looked at her pentascroll. Midoriya, Luffy, Vi, Lucy, all asking for her and willing to lend an ear. She smiled and turned to see Crymini and Pentious peeking from behind a pillar. So she had a rough first day. Tomorrow, like Midoriya would, she would try again. And like Lucy, she would follow the golden rule. “Husk. Angel probably doesn’t want to see me right now. If you can get him to come back here, I would really appreciate it.”  

Husk had the decency to look uncomfortable, “I don’t know, I mean, I was pretty much on his case from the get-go and today didn’t help.”  

“Well then, I guess we both need to learn a lesson. I’m going to prepare for tomorrow and start some individual sessions, starting with boundaries. You need to start with sorry.”  

“Ugh fine.” Husk left from behind the bar and made towards the exit.  

“Husk. If he doesn’t want to come back, don’t force him. I can’t force anyone in this hotel, but I do want to make sure everyone is alright.”  

“Unlike me, who you’re forcing to go out and look for him.”  

“That’s different, you’re my employee, I pay you nothing.”  

---

The Chat  

 

Midoriya: Guys, I think we need to talk.  

 

Charlie: Guys, group meeting everyone, assemble.  

 

Vi: Yeah, I’ve got something to say.  

 

Lucy: Me too. Let’s give each other a chance to talk and not interrupt. As soon as everyone arrives, let’s start with Midoriya and-  

 

Vi: Do you ever shut up? Seriously, it’s like pulling a string on a doll. Someone brings up ethics or some crap and You just have to go off like some diplomat.  

 

Lucy: Woah, where did that come from? I get that we have this sort of back and forth thing but if this is about your sister-  

 

VI: This is what I’m talking about. Not everything needs a psychological breakdown, sometimes I can just be pissed at you.  

 

Charlie: Vi, listen, I don’t know who shit in your coffee, but lashing out will only harm your recovery.  

 

Midoriya: Charlie... please stop pretending to be a psychologist.  

 

Charlie: ...Midoriya...  

 

Midoriya: Can we please be honest guys. I mean... looking back on everything, what we’ve talked about and what we’ve seen...  

 

Vi: I’ll say it. How can I be sure any of you are telling me the truth?  

 

Charlie: That’s what this is all about? You don’t believe this chat is real?  

 

Midoriya: Clearly the chat is real but I’m not sure all of you are who you say your are.  

 

Lucy: Guys, even if the chat isn’t real, the people on the other side are. Is this really how you want to burn your bridges?  

 

Vi: If it means I stay safe. If it means enforcers don’t crack down on me the moment I let slip my exact location. YES! My sister, my friends, they take priority.  

 

Lucy: I thought we were friends.  

 

Vi: REAL LIFE FRIENDS. Like the ones I can actually talk to in real life, shake hands with, punch, spit on.  

 

Charlie: Because that’s your answer to everything. Even your friends you lash out at.  

 

Midoriya: CHARLIE! STOP! I don’t know if you really are a person at the other end of this but psychoanalyzing us is not good practice, it’s not ethical and it’s not a sign of being a good friend.  

 

Lucy: Shouldn’t we wait for Luffy to join us, he might-  

 

Vi: How am I sure it’s not just some ruse using hex tech to capture me again?  

 

Midoriya: How do I know this isn’t a quirk used to scam me again?  

 

Charlie: ...how do I know this isn’t another one of the Vee’s ruses to undermine me again?  

 

Lucy: ...  

 

Lucy: What, you expect me to spout off about some mistrust or a trick? THis is the wasteland, where-  

 

Vi: Doesn’t mean it’s not a tri-  

 

Lucy: DON’T INTERRUPT ME AGAIN! I will say what I have to say. THe wasteland doesn’t have anyone to trick me. Even Moldaver, wherever she is or whatever resources she has, she doesn’t care about me. She doesn’t have the means to set this up. Nobody in the wasteland has the resources to trick me like this and if they did, why target me? Why target us? Why were we chosen?  

 

Midoriya: Because each of us possesses something important to the future... at least, that’s what you all say. But I’m not going to dig my grave any more on this. You want the secret of my quirk, come at me with all you’ve got. It’s my duty to protect it!  

Vi: You want the hex crystal; well it’s my bargaining chip to save my sister.  

 

Lucy: Well, if you want this head, I’m going to make you work for it. I know where it is and I’m ready now. I will kill you if I want to save my dad.  

 

Charlie: I fucked up.  

 

Midoriya: huh?  

 

Charlie: I don’t care if this isn’t real but I will scream into the void and make a promise. I fucked up with handling Angel. I drove him away and let him down. I pushed too hard. Hell, I always push too hard. I never cared about boundaries or privacy if I could just prove my point as loudly and proudly as I could. I think that’s one thing I got from my dad. Pride. Thinking I could change Hell in such a loud, boastful way.  

 

Lucy: Charlie, please don’t talk about yourself this way.  

 

Charlie: Why? I screwed up with my new residents. I’ve alienated my contacts in Hell and my oldest resident is off on a bender somewhere spiraling. I’m not a good psychiatrist. Or psychologist. Or Therapist or counselor or guru. But I'm going to try. So even if the rest of you leave this chat, I'm going to keep helping people. If you are here to undermine my efforts, sabotage me or make me second guess myself, I got bad news for you. I’m still trying.  

 

Charlie has logged out  

 

Midoriya: I’m still going to be hero, even if you know about my power, it’s still my duty.  

 

Midoriya has logged out  

 

Vi: I’m going to save my sister. That’s my promise.  

 

Vi has logged out  

 

Lucy: I’m still here. And I’ll be here when you guys come back. So please, don’t leave me alone.  

 

...  

 

...  

 

...  

 

User: Please help me. I found this snail in my friend's house but I need to send a message out. Pirates are here and my friend Kaya is in danger. This is Captain Usopp, I need your help.  

 

Notes:

Bit of a downer ending. Just to assure you all, I won't linger long on this break up, I just think it's important that the development of characters comes with conflict as well as self realization.
Don't worry, the next chapter will come soon and they will arrive at the same conclusion as the narrator for SpongeBob did for the Zombie Health Inspector episode; "Yes, they are all idiots, aren't they."

Leave a review in the comments below.
We'll be back to our regular format in the following chapter for this Chat Fic.

Chapter 11: This is how we survive… the POWER OF FRIENDSHIP

Summary:

What can possibly bring our team back together? VIOLENCE!

Notes:

Man, who saw that Hellaverse update, I update the chapter including Helluva Boss characters getting involved in the Hazbin Hotel and then we get a video confirming they will crossover in the future. Man, I was giddy the whole way through.

Chapter 11

 

Lucy: My name’s Lucy. What’s your name again?

 

Usopp: Can’t you just read it? Sorry, that came off way snippier than I intended. Sorry, I’m panicking because I just escaped the house where my friend Kaya lives and her butler just killed my other friend and dumped my other other friend down a well.

 

Lucy: Okie Dokie, lot to work with here. Normally there’d be others here and we’d be talking to Luffy... where is Luffy?

 

Usopp: Oh damn. He must be back in the house. Who knows what they’re doing to him.

 

Lucy: I honestly don’t know the limitations of his rubber powers, so I’m guessing... poooiiiisoooon?

 

Usopp: Is that a guess or do you honestly not know?

 

Lucy: Look, I’m a diplomat, I only sound like I know everything. If you want the braniac, talk to Midoriya. Or you could if he was here.

 

Usopp: I’m still trying to strategise but the best I can come up with is wking up my town and getting a mob together.

 

Lucy: YES! Do that! Why don’t more people do that?

 

Usopp: Because I’ve pretty much been doing that since I was ten and now no one believes me.

 

Lucy: ...whyyyyy?

 

Usopp: You wouldn’t understand even if i explained it to you.

 

Lucy: Hey, as long as your not motivated by revenge or some kind of dad issue, I think I can empathise.

 

Usopp: Is... are dad issues common on this thing?

 

Lucy: Confound it man. Well, it looks like you’re going to have to make an official complaint with your local authorities. Right?

 

Usopp: Except local authorities are the ever-roaming marines who have no base set on our island and are completely unreachable. Is this what we spend our berries on, becuase I would like to make an official complaint? Just get me a marine and I’ll give him a piece of my mind.

 

Coby: Umm, hi?

 

Usopp: By telling them just how timely they are and their bravery means the world to my little village and the beautiul family I have to go home to, so please don’t hurt me.

 

Coby: I’m not here to hurt you, I overheard you shouting for help and well, I’m here to help.

 

Lucy: Wait a second, is that... it is, it sounds like Coby. Hi Coby, long time no... well, not see but listen?

 

Coby: Oh wow, you’re the person Luffy was talking to back on the boat.

 

Usopp: Wait, you know Luffy, my another other best friend?

 

User: So, we have finally captured the crew of the infamous Straw Hat. Not much to write home about, one man holding a transponder snail. Where is Roronoa Zoro? I need to have words with him.

 

Coby: Helmeppo wait, a civilian is asking for marine help, that takes priority over a wild goose chase.

 

User name added: Helmeppo

 

Lucy: Well, if you want to find Zoro, he’s in a well somewhere, so your best bet of catching him is fishing him out.

 

Helmeppo: OK, who said that, are you the thief who travels with Straw Hat?

 

Lucy: What, no. I’m the lady on the snail... thingy.

 

Helmeppo: Why do the Straw Hats have what looks like a Buster Call snail. Sir, unhand it right this instance.

 

Usopp: Hey, c’mon guys, this is just you’re standard Transponder, nothing suspicious at all. In fact, this was a gift from my friend Kaya who, by the way, is BEING ATTACKED BY PIRATES!

 

Coby: OK, we’ll help you, please lower your voice. Do you mean Straw Hat Luffy is attacking your friend?

 

Usopp: No, no, no, it’s a completely different pirate. Kuro, I think he called himself, black cats or something.

 

Helmeppo: Aha, now I know you’re covering for the Straw Hats, because Kuro was executed by my father three years ago.

 

Lucy: Usopp, when did Kuro come to your village?

 

Usopp: Three years ago. I can prove it too; do you have a wanted poster or something?

 

Coby: Not on us no, and the ship isn’t even docked.

 

Helmeppo: Plenty of time for this one to sneak his pirate allies away while we go bungling about for proof of a man who’s already dead.

 

Lucy: I can’t believe I have to be the Midoriya and the Vi right now but, sir please shut up, you’re wasting both our time and oxygen. Which is always in limited supply.

 

Helmeppo: I’m sorry, was that... not exactly a threat, was that an insult? I genuinely can’t tell.

 

Coby: I feel like we are getting off track. Usopp is it? Can you lead us to this house?

 

Usopp: Are you going to arrest my friends?

 

Helmeppo: Yes.

 

Coby: Maybe, but not yet. We need proof that this butler is a pirate beyond you telling us so.

Lucy: Why not just ask for someone on the ship to send a picture into chat?

 

Helmeppo: Because we don’t have a snail, haven’t you been listening and if we did, Garp’s personal contact is not available.

 

Lucy: What about this one?

 

Coby: ...That just might work! Give it here. You lead us to the pirates, we’ll make the call.

 

Coby: Calling warship, this is Cadet Coby calling for Vice Admiral Garp!

 

Helmeppo: And Cadet Helmeppo, also present.

 

User: This is Garp, reading loud and clear lad. What sort of mess have you gotten yourselves into? Did you find Straw Hat Luffy yet?

 

Username changed to Garp

 

Coby: Not quite sir. We have found a lead to their location, but it seems another pirate might take precedence.

 

Helmeppo: I argued against it sir, I know out priority is Straw hat and his crew.

 

Lucy: I want to point out how horrifying it is that they have the marines on their tails but I’m also proud Luffy managed to already earn a reputation.

 

Garp: You and me both lass. Wait, that part was said out loud, I meant to say, we will bring him to justice

 

Coby: Vice-Admiral, it doesn’t really work that way.

 

Garp: On with your reason for the call lad, what business do you have?

 

Coby: Right, do you happen to have any wanted posters for a... what’s he called again... thank you, Captain Kuro. Associated with the Black Cat pirates.

 

Garp: Ay, give me second, I’ll see if I can find it. Bogart, help me find this thing.

 

User: Vice-Admiral, you wouldn’t keep losing these things if you didn’t keep flipping your table any time you got bad news.

 

Garp: You’d think I’d know where everything is after I’ve cleaned it up. Give us a tick cadet, we’ll find it soon enough.

 

Garp has logged off

 

Lucy: Huh, I just realised, there is a superior officer docked off-shore and you guys are going in alone to face a pirate captain.

 

Helmeppo: I can handle it, he is like all pirates, easy to predict and easy to capture with the right bait.

 

Coby: But you said Kuro was captured by your father, a marine captain. If he escaped, then that means he’s stronger than you and your father.

 

Lucy: Well, Vi’s not here and neither is Angel so... ROASTED his butt, Coby!

 

Helmeppo: Sh-shut up. THere’s no proof he’s Kuro and for all we know this pirate is a liar.

 

Usopp: I’m not a pirate... yet... but you can’t convict me for a crime I haven’t done yet. By the way we’re here.

 

Coby: Well for one thing, thank you. For the other, yes we can arrest you, that’s conspiracy to commit piracy.

 

Usopp: Well, like he said, I’m a liar, what do I know.

 

Coby: I...what...ugh, let’s get this over with. Hello, this is the marines, please step out and answer some questions please.

 

Klahador: Greetings the Navy. How might I be of service? The hour is late and my Lady is asleep.

 

Coby: Apologies sir, we have some questions for you regarding some pirates. Have you seen a man in a straw hat, goes by the name of Luffy.

 

Lucy: Aw, what, Coby, you said you were going to investigate Kuro and Luffy comes later... I probably shouldn’t have said that out loud for him to hear should I?

 

Jeeves: Probably not Mam, he will most likely murder them if he suspects they are onto his plan- oh bugger me, now I’ve done it!

 

Klahador: I don’t know what yarn Usopp has been spinning nor why he seems to have robbed back the gift he gave my Lady for her birthday, but he has harassed this house for far too long.

 

Usopp: Ask to look around, I saw a dead body in the basement and they dumped my other friend into the well.

 

Klahador: You have no probable cause to invade this mansion. Leave now or I shall report you to your superiors. Unless you have proof of Usopps claims, I will bid you adieu.

 

Garp: Oy, Coby, I found that bounty poster for Kuro, sending it on now, is there any likeness?

 

Kuro: ...OH FIND ME IN THE ALPS!

 

Garp: That counts as admission of guilt, marines, bring him in.

 

Lucy: Well, all's well that ends well, right Usopp? Usopp? Right Uso-

 

Usopp: He attacked the marines and knocked out two of them. I think Coby and Helmeppo escaped but I have to get into the house. If Kuro is distracted, I can get Luffy to help me and we can get Kaya out of there.

 

Lucy: Man, see, this is why I don’t do the strategy! Why couldn’t Midoriya be here?

 

Cooper: Maybe the question you should be asking is why do you easily trust him?

 

Lucy: Son of a biscuit, how do you keep finding me?

 

Cooper: That’s practically my job Miss McClaine. Gotta admit, after you gave me share of some spray, I gave thought that maybe I would give you a mulligan on that whole smashing up my supply in the first place.

Lucy: Buuuut...

 

Cooper: But... you are clearly looking for that head the gulper took, you had this glum look on y’alls face that made it look like you were going on a suicide mission with no plan in mind, plus you’re going in the wrong direction, you’re going north instead of going west.

 

Lucy: Dangit, the tracker is set to Moldavers location instead of the head, I forgot to switch it back!

 

Cooper: That’s what I thought.

 

Lucy: Well what do you expect? I was dragged for miles in the sun, you gave me no water, killed a man in front of me and then cut off my finger! Who keeps track of their location after all that?

 

Cooper: Me. I do that. That’s like navigation one-oh-one. Count your footsteps and know where you came from and where you wanna go. See now, you got that fancy do-dad on your wrist making all the choices for you like some suped-up compass.

 

Lucy: Why are you really here?

 

Cooper: Welp, after that debacle back at the Superduper mart, someone is bound to come looking for the folks who shot up the place. You managed to wrangle up a new fangled robot as back-up, not bad. But some extra back-up goes a long way.

 

Lucy: Still waiting.

 

Cooper: FINE! It’s to pay you back for the drugs. I mean they had whole stacks of Med-X, Psycho, Jet, Mentats and Steady. I’m pretty set for life thanks to you. Plus, not having to negotiate means I have access to all the refrain mix to keep my mind greased up.

 

Lucy: Of course. Well, not like I know how to handle a gulper anyway. Fine, tag along, but if you feed me to that thing again, I swear, Jeeves here will reopen his clinic and harvest your nutsack.

 

Jeeves: Just a little nip and tuck from old Snip-Snip.

 

Cooper: Noted. So what’s happening on the tube?

 

Lucy: Well, someone on their end must have said something and scared them all off because none of them trust the chat is real and logged off almost an hour ago.

 

Cooper: Huh. How bout that.

 

Lucy: Something on your mind.

 

Cooper: Something I can talk about later. What else?

 

Lucy: This new guy is stuck fighting off some pirates and Luffy and his friends are trapped in the house. I don’t know how to help them and the rest of the gang have gone radio silent.

 

Cooper: Then lets get them back on the air. Ahem.

 

Cooper: CALLING ALL DIPSHITS, emergency broadcast, SOS, CQD, Code 33, Code 3, Code Bravo, DEFCON 1. One of those should work.

 

Lucy: One of what?

 

Midoriya has logged on

Vi has logged on

Charlie has logged on

 

Vi: Yo, what the fuck was that?

 

Midoriya: My phone started ringing with some alarm or alert while I was training Vi’s pile driver move.

 

Charlie: Mine woke me up with a bunch of beeps like morse code.

 

Lucy: I still don’t get it, you just shouted military jargon into the thing and they all came back?

 

Cooper: During the last stages of the war, turning on or typing out devices or messages took precious seconds we didn’t have. So, everything became voice activated in case of emergency. Chances are that these folks recognized or picked up on at least one emergency frequency.

 

Midoriya: Yeah my phone started blaring out the police radio code 3.

 

Cait: Our one started blaring the Enforcer signal.

 

Vi: Our one?

 

Cait: Time and a place!

 

Charlie: My one started blasting out morse code. Makes sense actually, that’s the only untapped emergency contact not controlled by the Vee’s.

 

Lucy: Yes, great, chat is multi–dimensional, we did the whole culture shock the first time. Yes, we snapped at each other, we can apologize later. Plan now. Luffy and his friends are trapped with a pirate, no help is coming and I’m only in contact with his friend Usopp.

 

Midoriya: Oh crapx, ok, ok, ok, here we go, plans. Give me second!

 

Vi: Where’s our boy now?

 

Usopp: RIght here. Sorry, had to go radio silent for a few, couldn’t let Kuro catch me sneaking into Kaya’s room. Nami’s with me now.

 

Nami: Hey, just escaped a pirate. Turns out they’re poisoning Kaya. Thankfully Usopp had the wanted poster, and I could get us moving into the servant's passage, but we are twisting in the wind right now!

 

Vi: Calm down. Being hotheaded and scared makes you stupid and vulnerable. BElieve me, I know.  If you can slow your breathing and keep moving through the walls, then you can escape somewhere else or corner him. Who are we working with?

 

Usopp: Kuro is a pirate captain that has foot long claws, two crew members and can move faster than I can see, I literally blink he disappears behind me.

 

Vi: OK, fast speed, use that. He most likely needs a lot of space to move, so get somewhere crowded.

 

Cait: Don't hit him head on, stay moving and hidden, strike from the shadows. And despite what Luffy says, don’t announce your attacks. Resources and sit-rep?

 

Nami: Well the windows and doors are shuttered thanks to Kaya’s security system, we can’t go back out the way Usopp did, Zoro is out of the house and Luffy is back in the kitchen. I knocked out one crew and hid him in a cupboard. I brought a pan with me, not that it’s much use.

 

Midoriya: Brilliant. Usopp, what do you have?

 

Usopp: Some spare rubber slings to replace my slingshot, a few lead stars and... that’s it.

 

Midoriya: If you can use the bands to make a single one, attach them to two grounded pieces of heavy furniture, use the pan as a projectile and wait for the moment to strike Kuro! Nami, get Kaya somewhere safe and quiet, she needs to be prioritized if Kuro has plans for her.

 

Kaya: I can’t stay out of this, he used my family, used me, now he wants to kill me. After he’s poisoned me. I’m not some pitiable rich girl and since when can the snail do all that.

 

Usopp: I lied. It was a clever lie to stop Klahador from stealing it. But right now, it’s telling the truth. You are more important alive and revenge is not going to help you.

 

Charlie: Or your friends. Kaya, listen to me, feeling angry will push you to survive when you feel weak but I cannot help you fight. Fighting angry makes you do the worst thing that can hurt your friends. Listen to the experience Vi and I have and learn from us.

 

Kaya: So what do I do? He’s taunting me, he’s right outside the walls.

 

Charlie: Listen to the sound of my voice. And talk to me. Tell me about your family. I’m here to listen to you.

 

Usopp: Woah, he just stabbed the walls watch out!

 

Kaya: He stabbed my arm, it’s bleeding!

 

Nami: I swear, he better not lick the blades, that freak.

 

Usopp: Kaya, your parents would want you to live, whisper to her, tall her about them.

 

Kaya: I don’t even know you.

 

Charlie: It doesn’t matter if you don’t know me, I can help you, that’s all that matters.

 

Nami: I think we need to separate. If we can draw Kuro in two directions, we might be able to lure him away from the opening mechanism and escape through one of the windows.

 

Kaya: But I can’t fight.

 

Usopp: Most of my battles were at sea and using cannons. Plus, doesn’t he have two other pirates with him?

 

Nami: There’s three of us, even odds.

 

Kaya: How do you figure.

 

Nami: I don’t, that’s just a clever lie to calm you down.

 

Usopp: Maybe, if I can distract them with noises, I can lure them all over the house and give you guys enough time to open the windows.

 

Nami: We don’t have more than one snail. Kaya needs to keep listening to Charlie if she wants to remain calm, so you’re going to have to stay out of sight if this it to work.

 

Usopp: Stay outta sight, no problem whatsoever. Good luck. Take care Kaya, I’ll come back as soon as you start. OK, break.

 

Nami: Kaya, does the east wing have a trash chute, dumb waiter, something?

 

Kaya: Yes, it leads directly to the kitchen.

 

Nami: Then that’s how we contact Luffy.

 

Nami: OK, Usopp should be in position, lets start cranking.

 

Kaya: I can hear him yelling, he’s going to be furious if he finds me or Usopp.

 

Nami: Keep twisting, and keep talking to Charlie.

Kaya: Thank you for not pitying me and for not looking down on me. ANd I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable while talking about my mother. Losing a mother can change you, often times for the worst.

 

Charlie: I know what you mean. I haven’t spoken to my mom in seven years. She was always so supportive of me. But ever since she left, the hole she left only got bigger when my Dad felt it too and sometimes it feels like he abandonned me.

 

Vi: She can be the most important figure ion your life, even if you only knew her for a brief time. Losing both can be awful.

 

Midoriya: I have someone I can talk to. And... I think she should talk to you as well. When this is over and you beat Kuro.

 

Nami: ...How did you know...

 

Kaya: That look on your face when I told you about her dress, it’s the same one I made when Usopp pointed out I wore one of my mothers dress. When I looked in the mirror, I felt her. I miss her.

 

Nami: Me too.

 

Kuro: Allow me to reunite the two of you.

 

Nami: Oh shit!

 

Usopp: Special attack, iron star.

 

Kuro: Your toys don’t work on me Uso- is that a giant slingshot!

 

Nami: Holy shit, you nailed the fucker in the side of the head.

 

Usopp: Quickly, while he’s dazed, get to the window.

 

Nami: Luffy, if you get this message, we’re getting out the top floor window, meet us outside.

 

Lucy: This part sucks, now we can’t keep track of where anyone is, if Luffy even gets this thing.

 

Midoriya: To be fair, we are all still stressed from earlier and we’re not exactly firing on all cylinders.

 

Vi: Ekko’s been giving me the evil eye the whole trip to the bridge. Dammit, I can’t get out of the routine of talking to you guys.

 

Charlie: I have no idea if the Vee’s are tracking me through this but I need to help someone.

 

Luffy: Even if it’s a scam?

 

Midoriya/Vi/Lucy/Charlie: LUFFY!

 

LUFFY HAS STARTED STREAMING SERVICE (Proceeds to ignore Nami’s message and shoot up through the dumb-waiter and rocket out the top right into Kuro’s stomach, catching him completely off guard. He tries to run at high speeds towards Nami and Kaya climbing out a window but halts to catch a punch thrown by Luffy. He smiles in contempt but is blindsided once more by Usopp swinging the cast iron skillet at his head. Disorientated, he sways away from the escapees who dive back in and crouch low. Because Luffy has used his stretched arm to sling his body towards Kuro, his head trailing behind as his neck stretches and brings it slamming into Kuro’s face, sending him flying out the window.)

 

Midoriya: Talk about your team deathmatch. That was insane how synchronised you all are.

 

VI: Don’t ease up yet, you still have two pirates to deal with.

 

(The door to the room swings open and two pirates in elaborate dress are thrown through by Zoro. He storms in, swords sheathed and tailed by Helmeppo and Coby.)

 

Zoro: Piece of cake.

 

Usopp: You guys are crazy, can I join?

 

Luffy: YEAH! New crewmember!

 

Nami: That was pretty clutch at the end. But how did you trick Kuro.

 

Midoriya:  I might have told him to ignore Vi’s advice about shouting out attack names and use that to lower Kuro’s guard if he thought a light attack was coming.

 

Vi: That was so diabolical, I'll forgive you for countering my instructions.

 

Cait: Think of it as a little lesson in trickery.

 

Charlie: So, we’re all alive then#.

 

Helmeppo: Thanks to us, your swordsman was able to defeat the other pirates. You owe us.

 

Coby: Helmeppo, we literally just pulled him out the last few feet of the well, he climbed most of the way and went on to fight two swordsfolk while we stood on the sidelines.

 

Helmeppo: Well, clearly the Navy isn’t supposed to interfere in the affairs of pirates.

 

Lucy: Wait, you guys didn’t pick up the rifles those two marines dropped when Kuro attacked them?

 

Helmeppo: ...

 

Coby: I knew we forgot something. So much for acting decisively.

 

Garp: Ay, looks like you need a few more lessons. Let’s start with throwing a punch.

 

Lucy: Wait a minute, you knew this was happening the whole time and didn’t come in to save them!? What kind of superior officer are you?

 

Garp: I was sleeping. Right, get on with it lads, arrest the remaiing pirates, bring them in.

 

Kaya: If I might interject, the Straw Hats saved my life, therefore I will not be pressing charges. So, you may take your authority from out my door and as far away as possible.

Kaya: And as for the rest of you, thank you for guiding us through that ordeal. All of you, even when you’re not even here, make quite the incredible crew. Even if an absurd number of you do seem to have a number of parental issues.

 

Luffy: Except me.

 

Vi: I guess Luffy is built different.

 

Garp: I don’t think so you brat.

 

Luffy: Grampa?

 

Midoriya/Nami/Zoro/Usopp/Coby/Helmeppo/Vi/Charlie/Lucy: GRAMPA!

 

 

Notes:

SITREP: Cat is neutered and Cap is put on blast.
Please drop a review, it sustains me. It’s all horizontal progression around here, lets see those numbers jump!

Also, wanted to give Usopp more to do here. Poor Jacob was left on the cutting room floor. Matt Owens even said there were more scenes but the final product lacked a lot of the ones he approved of.

Chapter 12: Finally some… SOME answers

Summary:

Now that the issue of communication is slowly being overcome, maybe we can get the chat back on track with some clear, concise answers-never mind, this raises so many more questions!

Notes:

Happy Birthday Luffy, I’ll be sure to get another chapter out soon for your present.

Mrs Midoriya: Izuku, why have you cut yourself off from-hey what are you-Izuku stop that...

 

Midoriya: Mom! It could be compromised. This whole time we’ve talked about ourselves, we’re vulnerable and we don’t know for sure who they are.

 

Mrs Midoriya: Izuku, before you started questioning all this, did you like talking to them?

 

Midoriya: Wha- well, yeah, I did.

 

Mrs Midoriya: Violet, before this, did you ever tell anyone or even plan to tell anyone about your sister?

 

Vi: Mmmmrrrghhhhh, No dammit!

 

Mrs Midoriya: Charlie, before now, did you feel like you had enough encouragement with just Vaggie in your corner?

 

Charlie: I’ll be honest, sometimes, even Vaggie couldn’t lift my spirits. And she tried so hard every time. But sometimes, I would just let her down.

 

Mrs Midoriya: That’s what all sinners go through. That sense of worthlessness, that everything's gone wrong and its best not to worry anyone with your problems. I think you and your friends found out how listening helps.

 

Vi: I guess... I just fell into this naturally. Like, I wasn’t asked about it, I wasn’t proded, except when I was... Charlie.

 

Charlie: I know

 

Midoriya: I feel more confident than I have in months.

 

Mrs Midoriya: In years, honey.

 

Midoriya: I’m opening up now Mom, please don’t mock me when I show emotions.

 

Mrs Midoriya: And Luffy... I don’t know how to talk to you.

 

Luffy: I get that.

 

Mrs Midoriya: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions?

 

Luffy: No.

 

Lucy: I do.

 

Mrs Midoriya: I know Lucy.

 

Lucy: I’m sad.

 

Mrs Midoriya: I know Lucy.

 

Midoirya: So, should we talk or...

 

Vi: Still coming to terms with one of us being related to one of the highest levels of authority in their worlds version of an army or police.

 

Charlie: So, do you finally believe that this is a multiverse chat?

 

Vi: I don’t know. OK, I DON’T KNOW! Why are you acting like we’re idiots for not wanting to trust the first good thing in our lives.

 

Charlie: The heart has no metric, everyone is entitled to their suffering.

 

Vi: Exactly! I mean, I was in prison, constantly questioned, beaten and tortured. How was I supposed to know with the sudden arrival of an enforcer that this wasn’t some form of psycho-torture.

 

Cait: To be fair, I should’ve been honest with you from the beginning, , I’m not really an Enforced anymore. I sort of... lied about my connections and broke you out without any authority.

 

Vi: I love you.

 

Cait: Whaaat?

Vi: Oh come on, I saw the way you swing when we were at that brothel. OK, Ok, just kidding, put your hands down.

 

MIdoriya: I have been bullied my whole life since I didn’t manifest a quirk. So to suddenly have friends, I didn’t know the limits of what I should and shouldn’t say to make it less awkward. I should’ve known not to tell you something so important just to make you like me.

 

Lucy: Of course, we love you for you. Not like Vi loves Caitlyn though.

 

Vi: I swear, this is like training for when I find Jinx again.

 

Midoriya: Thanks for saying that Lucy. I’m glad you can grow to like an Asian like me, you Yank.

 

Lucy: I thought we dropped that.

 

Cooper: Dang, I didn’t realize you had it in you. I thought you were sunshine and rainbows, through and through. Got a little dirt under your nails. Gotta admit, beats travelling alone, I wonder how the pooch is doing?

 

Charlie: Now I’ll ask about the elephant in the room, are we okay with this. A former torturer accompanying the person he tortured through the wasteland.

 

Lucy: Honestly, I don’t even care anymore. We’ve been walking for miles, I thought for sure Cooper would crack before I did by listening to all of us, but he and Jeeves have been trading jokes non-stop. And who’s fault is it for leaving their dog behind?

 

Charlie: Ooooh, can I hear one, I really need a mood lifter right now?

 

Lucy: Charlie NO! What have you done?

 

Cooper: Well now, I must admit, listening to you folks, I find I’m not quite as intelligent as I like to believe myself to be. That was some fine fast thinking I saw and heard last time. Me, I can’t even do math right, us cowfolk are always roundin’ up.

 

Vi:...

 

Cait:...

 

Lucy:...

 

MIdoriya:...

 

Charlie: HA...hehehehehe. Oh man, that’s good. Well Mr. Cowboy, I’m sorry to hear you lost your dog. That’s a dog gone shame.

 

Lucy: Please stop.

 

Vi: Fuck it, I’m leaving the chat again.

 

Midoriya: I’m out, I already listen to All Mights lame jokes on repeat. It’s weird how the more you spend time with someone so intimidating, the more you realize how much of a dork they are.

 

Lucy: Yeah, I’m getting that.

 

Cooper: Hehehe, I missed this, used to say these a lot back when.

 

Charlie: Getting back to the topic at hand. Why was it so easy for us to distrust this thing? More importantly, why is it so easy for us to fall back into the routine despite our blowout.

 

Midoriya: You’re willing to listen to us.

 

Charlie: Platitudes got me nowhere. Listening is proving effective.

 

Vi: Go ahead brainiac, what’s the deal?

 

Midoriya: Breaking it down, it should have been easy to determine this chat was genuine the moment we had our blowup. We were all threatening to leave the chat whereas if this was a scam, from each of our perspectives, the rest of the chat would have been going out of their way to convince the us to stay and keep revealing secrets.

 

Husk: Not to mention, you all have aesthetics that don’t match up at all. It’s like a scam not even putting in the effort to look like they belong. Even the Nigerian Prince scam emails use spell check and Wikipedia to make sure American suckers believe it's a real person.

 

Zoro: Plus, you’ve streamed live fights happening and none of our world's news picked up on that.

 

Vi: I guess, what I really want, for some peace of mind, is some crystal-clear clarification. Just someone straight out tell me this is a multiverse chat and bring the receipts.

 

K: This is a multiverse chat, here are the receipts.

 

VI: …Who?

 

Charlie: …What?

 

Midoriya: …Why?

 

Lucy: …Where?

 

Luffy: …Luffy.

 

K: Yeah, I should’ve nipped this in the bud the moment I saw a breakdown in group cohesion.

 

Vi: Holy shit, somebody answered.

 

Pentious: Now say, I just want money to rain from the skiessss. Quickly before it waresss off.

 

Crymini: Not sure it works like that bud.

 

Vi: I just want money to rain from the sky. Eh, eh? Nothing. Fuck.

 

Lucy: So wait, who’s this?

 

Midoriya: I remember. The letter K was the last signature of the first message of this chat.

 

K: Top of the class. Yeah, I figured I owed you guys an explanation. Most other chat logs try to stay low profile and keep out of the experiment. But sometimes, it’s required to intervene.

 

Vi: Yo, what, experiments!

 

K: Allow me to shed some light on the situation. Let’s go somewhere a little more discreet.

 

Vaggie: What the hell, where did Charlie go?

 

Cooper: Vaultie just up and disappeared right in front of me.

 

Zoro: Where’s the captain? He was right there!

 

Cait: She’s been taken, along with the rest of them. Midoriya is with them too.

 

Angel: He really needs to get more friends on this thing.

 

---

Somewhere, across the multiverse

 

In a strange void sat a computer terminal perched on a mobile standing desk. Midoriya was the first to wake up, he hazily pushed himself up and groaned as he neared the blinding white screen. Soon he heard various groans and popping joints around him. He spotted a woman in a blue jumpsuit covered in padding around the joints. Then a guy the same height as himself wearing a straw hat, clutching it close to his head with one hand. Next to him was a buff woman wearing a red jacket. Finally, an incredibly tall blonde woman dressed in a red pantsuit. They were his friends.

“Guys, holy cow, you’re all here!”

Shaken from their stupor, they finally gave the room a proper look around and jumped into action. They ran to hug each other in a mass tangle, broke off and hugged each other individually. First Midoriya was hugged by Luffy, whose arms wrapped around his entire body in a fantastic display of his elastic ability. Lucy was trying to hug the vastly taller Charlie but only succeeded in nestling into her chest. Vi tried standing to the side and warily judged the entourage.

They didn’t move to tackle her into a hug or even beg her to come over. They held open their arms and waited. Finally, she slowly walked over and was enveloped in a massive group hug. Vi at the center and Luffy wrapping them all up and Midoriya sprouting his black tendrils to wrap around them himself.

He could finally touch them. An entire group of people he called friends. Then he realized he was hugging three women and sprang back from the group. The rest chuckled in good nature and proceeded to group hug him. Luffy hefted the lot of them up, squeezing the air from their units until they begged to be released.

 

“Weird, I thought I was the strongest one here.” Commented Midoriya, though this got a miffed look from Vi.
“Puh-lease, you call your super steroids strength.” She slipped her jacket and flexed her biceps in an impressive curl.

“Nice muscles, but I got you beat.” Replied Luffy, who proceeded to not only flex his muscles but hold a deep breath and inflate his arms to cartoonish size.

“THAT doesn’t count balloon boy!” Vi and Midoriya rebuked him, though they had little to say when they were hoisted off their feet in his enlarged hands.

“You wanna know the crazy thing? I had no idea I could do this until just now.”

Midoriya looked unimpressed, a little jealous even, while Vi smiled snakily, “He’s like you except he has less of a brain. Funny thing is, he’s doing it all the time.”

“Quiet you.” He piped back at her, but shielded his mouth with his free hands, unaware of just how freely he spoke now, especially in person. Vi Glared playfully before she and Luffy laughed.

 

Nearby, Lucy and Charlie watched the exchange, gleefully pondering the implications of their meeting.

“Well it’s pretty neat to finally meee-what the fudge, how are you so tall!?”

“Tall. I’m pretty average height. Maybe you’re all small.” This comment seemed to strike right at the core of those gathered because they each collapsed to all fours, a cloud of depression hanging over their short statures.

 “Just for clarity,” Lucy whispered to Charlie, “you are the strongest, right?”

“I don’t like to brag.” She waved off the praise and blushed heartily. “But, yeah, pretty sure it’s literally godlike. Ooh, confidence, it feels good. Like a fresh suit.”

“Speaking of, I love that suit, it’s the real bees-knees. I’ve been looking for a new dress for ages, any chance I could bum one off you?”

“Absolutely, I have a whole closet full, I’ll bring them to you and let you pick!”

“This is the best day ever!”

 

A beeping signalled to them that something, or someone, required their attention. They turned and spotted the old modem computer blinking with a chat request.

“K wishes to speak.”

Lucy was the closest and sat down to speak into the mic sticking from the unit while the rest gathered around to peer into the screen. While they shoved and nudged closer, the screen seemed to expand to give a more open view for all to see.

“Better?”

They urged her to reply, and she spoke into the mic.

 

Lucy: Yes, thank you kindly.

 

K: So hey, I’ve been hearing some discord on the discord, what’s up with that?

 

Midoriya: Just some back and forth about the legitimacy of the app and if we were being manipulated.

 

K: Right. Probably should have accounted for that. Sorry.

 

Vi: You couldn’t have just, I dunno, talked to us before it got out of hand?

 

K: Sorry, I was in the middle of my application for SOMA. It’s neat, like a club for a bunch of administrators of multiverse chat logs.

 

Charlie: Seriously, how many multiverses are out there?

 

K: Literally infinite.

 

Charlie: Wow wow wow… wow.

 

K: So let’s nip this problem in the bud and settle the matter once and for all.

 

Lucy: Actually we’ve resolved it.

 

K: Oh really?

 

Lucy: Yeah, super easy, barely an inconvenience.

 

Luffy: Yup, turns out all we needed was a mom!

 

Vi: Yeah, that’s another thing. Did you put us together because we all had mommy issues?

 

K: Noooo, of course not.

 

Vi: Really?

 

K: Parental issues out the wazoo though, proper head cases all of you, really messed up.

 

Lucy: I resent that accusation.

 

Vi: Stockholm syndrome says what?

 

Lucy: Shut.

 

Charlie: I mean, was tearing reality apart really necessary, just so we could all get therapy?

 

Midoriya: So we could all be confronted with uncomfortable truths?

 

Luffy: I’m not even sure what we’re yelling about but you suck.

 

K:Oooh, aaah.

 

Midoriya: What’s wrong? Are you OK?

 

VI: Seriously?

 

K: Sorry, it’s my back.

 

Lucy: Your back?

 

K: Yeah, I need you all to get off it.

 

Vi: Fuck you dude.

 

Charlie: Do you have idea what to use this for or were you seriously just fucking around?

 

K: Unclear.

 

Vi: Make it clear!

 

K: Alright, my B. Truth is, I was just following up on an exposed wormhole.

 

Charlie: If Angel were here…

 

Midoriya: Wait, wormhole?

 

K: Oh sure. I’m like an undergraduate, most of my seniors have torn open gateways and reached through timelines. I’m only really piggybacking off their research.

 

Lucy: But why though? Creating connections has helped us, maybe, but I won’t say it’s not inconvenient to our daily life.

 

K: There was an idea. For communication. Just talking. To link unique universes and see how it affects their telemetry.

 

Charlie: Your talking about… well, like you can see through time.

 

K: Nothing of the sort.

 

Charlie: Oh thank-

 

K: I just know where your future ends up.

 

Vi: …what?

 

K: See, there is a prime universes timeline. Everything starts there. Somewhere along, a choice is made, that creates branches. The branches grow into their own complex universe, some create new branches but mostly stay the same. You are each  one of those branches.

 

Midoriya: We all emerged from our prime timeline.

 

K: All of you. I just made each of your branches interact through the use of a bridge, in the form of the chat log.

 

Vi: So I might have lived in a universe where my sister was never lost. Where my mom and dad?

 

Charlie: Vi, don’t get lost in the hypotheticals. Catastrophising will do you no good. 

 

K: Thank you for volunteering.

 

Charlie: WHY?

 

Vi: Wha-why me?

 

K: For speaking up. So yeah, there might be a universe like that. Or one where you went down Powders path. Or you one where you died. Or where you never existed.

 

Lucy: This is too much!

 

K: But you’ve adapted to it. That’s the first step of the chat. Next is considering the implications. Develop your empathy. Communication is key to conflict resolution. And what better way to resolve conflict is there than seeing yourself in the eye of the cosmos.

 

Charlie: To look at ourselves through heavens eye. How we could have been and what we never were. To truly see just how much of a decision we were from becoming like what we hate.

 

Lucy: To grok it.

 

Charlie: Wait grok?

 

Lucy: You know, grok!

 

Midoriya: I don’t follow.

 

Vi: So it’s not just an earth thing, I’m not getting it either.

 

Lucy: C’mon guys, grok it.

 

Vi: Repeating yourself doesn’t mean we understand it the more you say it.

 

Lucy: I guess Heinlein didn’t survive in your universes.

 

Charlie: Oh Robert Heinlein? He’s in Hell.

 

Midoriya: I follow the branching timeline. I follow the whole developing empathy and self reflection angle. But what I don’t follow is why you chose our universes.

 

K: Oh that was sheer laziness on my part. Your universes were each already compromised. Gaps in the fabric of reality around your universes had formed long before, I was able to tap into it and make the link. It’s also how I was able to drag you all here to a pocket dimension where you won’t explode.

 

Lucy: Oh fudge, explode.

 

Charlie: C’mon, we’re not exploding, we’re safe here. What do you think we are, Midoriya’s bones?

 

Vi: Stray shot, friendly fire.

 

Midoriya: Why’d I catch that stray?

 

Charlie: Something to help ease the tension. Take turns please, now elaborate.

 

K: Well, Charlie, links between the realm of Hell, Heaven and the mortal plain have been breached by demonic possession, divine intervention and basic portal jumps. Unseen to higher beings but obvious to those poking for them.

 

Charlie: I think I’m going to be having some words with the Sins.

 

Lucy: Right, Hell, forgot you were the monarch, I mostly think of you as a therapist.

 

K: Lucy, aside from the abundance of tachyons surrounding your planet, multiple summoning rituals have been performed before, not to mention numerous cases of teleportation technology.

 

Lucy: I can actually travel to meet Charlie and Midoriya and… wait, demonic summonings?

 

K: Luffy, the time space continuum has been mangled somewhat since the introduction of devil fruits. Someone has been leapfrogging through time in your universe, and someone has experimented with the chat log already. In fact, one of your universes branches is where this chat log started.

 

Luffy: Woah, the great pirates era stretches even into space. Wild. Was it a pirate who started it?

 

K: She was certainly playing fast and loose with the laws of her government and the laws of physics… so yeah.

 

Luffy: I bet she has some stories to tell.

 

K: Vi, the arcanum is dangerous, please heed my warning about the arcane ruins. It’s reaching dangerous levels of unpredictability. It might start pulling people in your universe across parallel dimensions.

 

Vi: Man, I really wish Pow-Pow was here, she could understand this science stuff way better. How am I supposed to convince scientists about a doomsday theory?

 

K: Use the communication device, I’ll explain more later.

 

Midoriya: What about me? As far as I know, my universe doesn’t have magic, high amounts of radiation or scientific experimentations that could make quirks tear holes in reality.

 

Vi: That you know of.

 

Midoriya: Thank you for the paranoia Vi.

 

Vi: Man who keeps a machete under his pillow is paranoid every night but one.

 

Charlie: That’s just an excuse for paranoid people to justify their paranoia.

 

K: Well then, you’re really not going to like this. Turns out, the rip in your universe came from one person being able to traverse universes.

 

Midoriya: Someone in my universe is from another? When? How?

 

K: It may have been recent, maybe in the last fifteen to twenty years. Someone traversed universes from a branch in their timeline and found yours. That’s how I was able to link into your universe.

 

Midoriya: Who? From where?

 

K: Don’t know for the first. But for the second…Lucy’s universe. I don’t know if it was her branch specifically.

 

Lucy: So a raider or, heck, someone like Cooper is wandering around hero world like it’s nobodies business?

 

K: It’s possible. Then again, given Midoriya’s universe, it’s not like he stands out.

 

Midoriya: I hate the fact you are right but at the same time love it because hetromorphs have a better time in my universe than yours Lucy.

 

Lucy: I won’t even argue, your universe is clearly better. But how did they do it?

 

K: No idea! One second they were in one universe, next thing theirs a hole the size of Plymouth punched through like a universal glory hole.

 

Midoriya: Ripe with disease and unwanted advances.

 

Charlie: Dude!

 

Midoriya: I should be more concerned about my lowering inhibitions, I never would have said that privately, let alone in polite company.

 

Lucy: Well… in company anyway.

 

Luffy: Sodo we get to travel into each others universe now? I so want to check out all these new places. Do you think our boat will travel through?

 

Charlie: Oh my gosh! All the opportunities to study therapeutic medicine and psychiatric sciences from different worlds! Not to mention field trips and exposure therapy. My mind is a flurry of ideas!

 

Lucy: I could move my vault out and into a healthy environment where we can get natural sunlight to provide UV radiation… and not all the other radiations.

 

K: Woah! Hold your horses.

 

Luffy: All out horses are stable.

 

Charlie: HA!

 

Midoriya: By All-Might, that was terrible.

 

Vi: I will literally button your mouth.

 

K: Ahem. Right now, travel between universes is not exactly… well it’s not impossible… but it’s tricky. You see, I’ve identified a bunch of universes that managed the crossover, a lot of the time it was direct intervention and helping people in those universes build the technology to help.

 

Midoriya: So if one of our universes managed to build a device to help, we could travel between each others?

 

K: Quantum Theoretically. It will require expanding the field of contributors to the chat to let them in the know. And requires your universe to have the know how… but yeah, I think it’s doable.

 

Vi: Awesome, I’ll get those egg heads to accelerate the portal building and we’ll an escape hatch by next week.

 

K: Let’s not get crazy. You also need to keep this on the downlow. I don’t know if the log itself is causing damage to the veils between worlds but a teleported would definitely widen it. Not to mention turn some heads.

 

Charlie: Dangit, he’s- wait, he or she?

 

K: He.

 

Charlie: He’s right, if people in out universe find out we can communicate let alone travel across dimensions.

 

Midoriya: It could be used by villains to gather technology or power from other worlds.

 

Vi: And I was going to tell Piltover! Man, I’m screwing this up again. They can’t be allowed access to your worlds.

Charlie: Nor the Vee’s or any other sinner. Possessions would be through the roof. And the DORHKS are already poking around where they don’t belong.

 

Luffy: Dorks?

 

Charlie: I’ll explain later.

 

Luffy: Well, what if we make a team with people we trust and we build the teleported ourselves.

 

Lucy: It would keep it in the loop.

 

Vi: And make it easier to find out if anyone we know is a traitor.

 

K: Alright, this is pretty exciting. Let’s get some more folks in the chat. I’ll assign each of you a new device or a code to assign to a person of your choosing. Just make sure they’re on the level.

 

Midoriya: Great! So, what now?

 

K: Now you all go home. I’ll keep in touch, just @ me in emergencies. Besides, you all have big days ahead of you. Starting hero academy, meeting with the city head honchos, finding a new crew mate!

 

Luffy: Hey, no spoilers. This is an exciting part of my journey, I don’t want to know what comes my way.

 

Vi: makes it all a little more exciting. Doubt cupcake will approve but she needs to let her hair down more.

 

Charlie: She looks so pretty when she wears it down.

 

Vi: She looks better with it up in that ponytail, especially that get up, man she just- hey now, what the hell am I saying?

 

Midoriya: This chat really is effective.

 

Vi: The day you find a guy or gal in your life Midoriya, I swear…

 

Midoriya: Izuku… I want you to call me Izuku. Call me by my first name.

 

Lucy: This is a pretty big deal. Thanks Mid-erm-Izuku.

 

Vi: Pretty forward their Izuku.

 

Luffy: I thought you liked girls?

 

Izuku: Ha, back on blast!

 

Vi: Someone get me a button!

 

K: OK! I’m outie. See you on fuck side flippers.

 

Charlie: Wait, I have more-

---

Hazbin Hotel, Hell

“-questions.” Charlie stumbled as she landed back in her room, bumping into a pacing Vaggie.

“Charlie! Que carajo potata?”
“Soy buena mi amor. Just a little group meeting. Turns out, we could all meet for the first time. So that’s neat.”

“What’s not neat is the fact that this guy, this human, somehow pulled the Princess of Hell out of Hell and into an alternate dimension.”

“Oh my God, OH MY GOD, I didn’t consider the implications!”

Vaggie grabbed her by the shoulders and turned her around, towards the bed, “Right now, you need to relax. You’ve been working non-stop trying to get this hotel in working order, Nifty I think is starting to get overworked keeping this place clean and we still have five months before the exorcists come back. They tend to be disorganized until the last minute so that gives us room.”

Charlie breathed deep and felt her mind calm, “Problem for another time. How’s the chat, did they get back safely?”

Vaggie gestured to the door, “Prety much, I think the whole time dilation thing is in effect, because they started chatting about a their day five minutes before you came back.”

“Right, they’re running a day ahead of us, or a month, it’s weird like that. So, where is it?”

“Alastor is talking to them so... wait, why did I think that was a good idea, ALASTOR!”

The two rushed from their bedroom, down the hall, past the rooms of their guests, to Alastors private domicile. Inside was a ladder connecting to his private radio station broadcaster. He was seated, a coffee in his custom Overlord mug, and bobbing his head to an electro swing jive.

 

Alastor: And that there Midoriya, is a fun little ditty I call Delight. A zesty number, subdued enough to calm the mind but energized for your exercise.

 

Vi: And remember to keep moving with those feet when you hold up guard. Eyes forward, keep your head up when you’re moving. You want to see what your opponent’s doing, not your feet.

 

Lucy: Good luck today Midor-erm, Izuku, knock ‘em dead... not literally, that tentacle power is still a powerhouse.

 

Izuku: Thanks guys, I’m ready to take the... second steps into UA.

 

Charlie: Hey Izuku, I just got here, good luck. Before you go in, Alastor didn’t say anything inappropriate, did he?

 

Alastor: I’m right here Charlie. And how vulgar, to assume I’m such a negative influence.

 

Vaggie: You’re you. The day you're not you is the day Charlie is actually successful with you.

 

Alastor: Oooh, let's give her an applause. Audio file transferred: Audience laugh track.

 

Notes:

All these chat fics and now they’ve gotten me addicted to Persona 5, now if only I could wrap my head around the stats and gameplay.

Chapter 13: OK, let's move on!

Summary:

Suddenly, the idea of a multiverse seems to be a good idea to begin some copyright infringem-I mean, get inspiration for how to survive in this new timeline. Just don't think about the implications of branching multiverses within your own universe.

Chapter 13  

---

 

Izuku: Zoro, how is the rest of the crew doing.  

 

Zoro: Eh, not bad. Kaya gave us a ship and Usopp came along for the ride.   

 

Luffy: So pro, we have a new ship. The exact one I was looking for in the shipyard. Told you I could do it Nami.  

 

Nami: Con, your grandfather came after us by literally throwing cannonballs at us. Didn’t you think to tell us that little fact?  

 

Usopp: So, I’m only new, I’ll just sit this one out, try and get familiar with this type of cannon.  

 

Nami: It’s the same way to use a cannon on every ship. Why is it you can somehow nail a guy moving at the speed of sound with a frying pan and some rubber bands, but a cannon somehow eludes you.  

 

Lucy: Not gonna lie Nami, your kind of messing with the vibe we’re trying to establish.   

 

Izuku: No offence Nami but it sounds like you got a serious chip on your shoulder about this.  

 

Nami: I just don’t like it when my crewmate deliberately hides information that’s critical to our survival.  

 

Vi: cough, hypocritesayswhat, cough.  

 

Nami: What was that!?  

 

Vi: I’m saying you're a hypocrite and a total wet blanket. Where was the chick who came up with plans to save a dude's friend and put their fate in a guy who ate poisoned soup?  

 

Luffy: That soup tasted delicious, slightly tangy and a hint bitter.  

 

Izuku: Ugh, you’re making me hungry. I haven’t had a binge in over a year. This low carb, high protein diet makes me long for the simple taste of deep fried katsudon.  

 

Charlie: Man, I’m craving some s’mores right now.  

 

Vi: Mmm, Jericho’s slop tastes real good right now.  

 

Cait: That stuff looked horrible.  

 

Vi: It’s deep-fried tentacle and spicy mayo. Maybe not serve on a plate but I’m sorry it’s not Cobb Salad.  

 

Cait: Bugger a cobb salad, I’m craving a curry right now. Tender chickpeas and...  

 

Lucy: Dangit, I could really do with a fancy lad’s snack cake.  

 

Cooper: Ah man, do you have to bring up that processed crap. Now what you really want is a nice slice of apple pie and a scoop of ice cream.  

 

Luffy: Foooood. I need foooood.  

 

Nami: You ate the entire banquet from Kaya’s birthday party!  

 

Luffy: But I threw most of it up when I had to get rid of the soup. Hope she’s not too mad about the mess I left in her kitchen.  

 

Usopp: DUDE! She gave us a free ship!  

 

Charlie: Snack break everyone! All in favour?  

 

Izuku/Nami/Zoro/Usopp/Luffy/Cooper/Vi/Charlie/Lucy: Aye!  

---

  Two Hours Later  

 

Charlie: Holy shit guys, I meant a light snack, what took you all so long?  

 

Midoriya: High protein, high calories, all spaced out for maximum effectiveness.  

 

Vi: Scavenged supplies throughout the lanes to feed the three of us and make it suitable for fussy britches over here.  

 

Cait: I’m not eating slop, that stuff will kill you I’m certain.  

 

Ekko: Been eating it my whole life, I’m still standing.  

 

Cait: You also breathe toxic fumes on a daily basis.  

 

Vi: Shit, you right.  

 

Lucy: Jeeves found a molerat and carved it up.  

 

Cooper: Doesn’t count as a hunt. Then again, it does taste like chicken.  

 

Lucy: What’s chicken? It tasted like ration paste to me.  

 

Cooper: Fuck I feel old.  

 

Alastor: How did you survive on that diet in the vault? That is not good eating.  

 

Vaggie: Don’t even talk to me, I’m pretty sure that wasn’t a deer carcass I saw you gnawing on earlier.  

 

Alastor: Rosie has been in contact far more since one of the new suckers arrived. In fact, she sent me over the finest cuts from Cannibal Town to commemorate a great first day.  

 

Lucy: Sweet holy moses, you eat people.  

 

Cooper: Gotta eat to live vaultie. Sometimes, jerky is bout all you can eat.  

 

Alastor: Ah, a fellow connoisseur.  

 

Izuku: For all that is sacred, please tell me we aren’t starting a cannibal sub-reddit in this chat.  

 

Charlie: No, no, no! None of that. Shame on you.  

 

Angel: So, we eatin’ dudes over here.  

 

Alastor/Cooper: No!  

 

Angel: What’s your favourite parts? I’m more of an ass man myself. Though some times I like to suck on-  

 

Husk: I swear to GOD motherfucker!  

 

Cooper: Won’t lie, ass meat has got a nice bit of fat on it, good for salt.  

 

Alastor: Prefer to avoid salt myself. Thigh is good. Though lats make for surprisingly good stir fry.  

 

Izuku: I can’t believe we as a chat have devolved into talks of cannibal fine dining!  

 

Vi: I’d be careful Middy. You sent that picture in a few days back. Those two are probably looking at you like some kind of smorgasbord.   

 

Izuku: Charlie, please protect me.  

 

Alastor: Oh come now, it’s not like your soul will end up where I can get it.  

 

Charlie: Perhaps I should get you in to talk to the guys here. It might be useful to here from your perspectives on earth how you lived your life.  

 

Husk: Might piss them off more if you rub it in their faces.  

 

Nami: We actually didn’t have time for a meal, I’m pretty sure Luffy cleared out our pantry because we had to make a break for it on the Merry.  

 

Zoro: We could make rice?  

 

Usopp: We don’t even know how to boil water dude.  

 

Luffy: Well, I’m bored, and we need to find some food in this fog. Hey Zoro, wanna fight?  

 

Zoro: Can’t. Sleeping.  

 

Luffy: Aw man, then Usopp how about we fight. Let’s see your slingshot in action.  

 

Usopp: Uh... yeaaah, I would but you know, a good sniper always keeps his eyes open for enemies and the great captain Usopp will defend his ship until his crews dying breath.  

 

Cait: What about your dying breath?  

 

Usopp: Captain goes down with his ship, I have to be the last to go.  

 

Luffy: Actually I’m the captain and I would definitely go down with the ship since I will drown.  

 

Izuku: Holy cow Luffy, please don’t speak like that.  

 

Vi: Also, slingshot? Your new crewmate fires slingshots.  

 

Angel: Seriously, get some firepower man.  

 

Cooper: A bullet in the right hand beats any gun.  

 

Cait: Who are you firing for Usopp, if you’re not going to be willing to take a life?  

 

Izuku: Now hold on guys, let's let Usopp speak.  

 

Usopp: Thank you. Honestly, I don’t like killing. I heard how my dad is a sniper, one of the best in the world. But a good sniper shoots exactly what they want to hit.  

 

Charlie: And don’t underestimate the sling. David once struck down a giant with a well-placed fling of a pebble.  

 

Vaggie: I personally think it was divine intervention that did in Goliath. Give me a spear any day.  

 

Lucy: The physical strength required to use the sling as a proper wweapon is pretty impressive. Say, do you think you could give me some pointers? Ammo is difficult to come by in the wasteland, I might as well use rocks laying around.  

 

Cooper: Huh, that’s the most proactive I’ve ever seen you about your own survival. What do you say slick, fancy teaching ol’ vaultie here some tricks.  

 

Nami: You’ll have to give him a minute, he’s staring off the side of the ship into the middle distance with this big stupid grin on his face. It’s honestly endearing.  

 

Luffy: Hey Nami, do you-  

 

Nami: Luffy you would destroy me, NO!  

 

Luffy: I won’t hurt you. Promise.  

 

Vi: That’s even more insulting.  

 

Izuku: Wait, if we can learn from you guys directly and you’re not busy... Luffy, can you teach me some of your moves?  

 

Luffy: My moves?  

 

Izuku: Yeah, they way your limbs stretch and your durability, it lines up perfectly with my quirk. Black whip is pretty much an extension of myself, it can stretch and twist and I've been looking at using it as a shield.  

 

Luffy: Why not just cover your body with it, like spread it all over. I mean, my whole body is rubber.  

 

Izuku: Spread it... all... over...  

 

Luffy: yeah, I just found out this cool new move where I inflate myself because I can stretch and fill up like a balloon.  

 

Nami: It was horrifying, you were like a puffer fish.  

 

Luffy: Oh man, I could really go for some seafood. Maybe some of that puffer fish.  

 

Nami: Err, Izuku, please distract him.  

---

  One Day Later  

 

Cooper: We found a man in a metal suit just sitting on the sidewalk. Of course, she has to go and rescue it like some lost puppy.  

 

Charlie: Are we projecting our feelings of loss for our dog?  

 

Cooper: No goddammit. And I don’t care if your granddaddy heard that.  

 

Charlie: I wish he would.  

 

Vi: She’s just collecting a bunch of you, like her own posse.  

 

Lucy: He was trapped in his suit, and I just wanted to help.  

 

Izuku: Huh… does this metal man need a heart?  

 

Lucy: …he needs a fusion core, yes.  

 

Angel: No way. And you’re saying you have a dog that follows you everywhere?  

 

Lucy: Yeah, but I don’t see…  

 

Cooper: Oh nooo…  

 

Vi: I’m missing the joke here and I don’t like it.  

 

Nami: Wait a minute, are you guys talking about…  

 

Cooper: I’m just going to nip this in the bud, YES! We get it, we’re the freakin’ Wizard of Oz.  

 

Lucy: That is so neato. So I’m Dorothy looking for a way home.  

 

Cooper: Nah, you’re more like the scarecrow looking for some brains.  

 

Lucy: Hey!  

 

Izuku: Then doesn’t that imply you’re a coward or a little girl in this group?  

 

Husk: Well finally, he speaks up for himself.  

 

Cooper: …fuck you dude.  

 

Angel: hahahaha  

 

Zoro: Well damn. That was like a set up and spike.  

 

Izuku: Aaaaand I’m out. I am here... at my new classroom.  

 

Vi: That was a reference to that All Might guy wasn’t it? I understood that reference.  

 

Lucy: Congratulations, way to go buddy.  

 

Cait: OK, I’m cool with Vi getting a few knocks but that’s one step to far.  

 

Lucy: What... the sarcasm?  

 

Cait: No after that.  

 

Lucy: Buddy.  

 

Vi: You mother- that's a personal attack.  

 

Lucy: Woah, woah, I meant nothing by that.  

 

Vi: ...OK...  

 

Lucy: No problem... Chief.  

 

 Vi: YOU-  

 

At that point, Midoriya closed the app and prayed to whoever would listen to him, that the chat wouldn’t cause a disturbance. ‘Then again, I should be praying to God considering I have tangible proof of his existence. Perhaps he should pray for a cool, collected classroom with no remnants of his old friend's ego. ‘ Maybe that’s wishful thinking’ he thought as he pushed open the door and came face to face with his most egregious tormentors recently, the guy who gave him a hard time in the exam and Bakugo, lazed and relaxed, pontificating like nobody was listening. And strangely enough, nobody really was. He boasted loudly to the only one giving him any attention. One of his classmates looked like she was desperately trying to read and ticked with annoyance every time he spoke up.  

He tried to inch his way to a seat, until the tall bespectacled student turned and noticed him. “It’s him... excuse me, but I must insist you allow me to apologies for my grossly inappropriate actions when we last met!” he bowed at a perfect angle.  

“All right, all right, calm down. Honestly, I owe you an apology for putting you on blast during the exams. So... Sorry.” now he bowed, not quite at a right angle, but there were now two obstacles for the door. 
“Huh, didn’t think someone's butt would be the first thing to see in hero class.” Izuku turned and saw the lovely hero hopeful who helped him out uring the exam. ‘I guess my luck is looking up this year.’ 

---

Wasteland, same time  

Titus had loaned Lucy some Rad-Away, the consumption of radioactive water and mole rat having done a number on her system not used to the topside environment or its food. She had tried to keep a positive attitude, leaving the chat out of her struggles and having some backup guide her safely to Moldaver. She left out her diarrhetic episodes and felt pretty embarrassed travelling with someone while she had to take care of her bodily functions. She hoped that Izuku would have a good first day. She recalled her own high school experience. And she felt that twinge of envy. A full community of unknowns and a new environment. She never had that, even the lessons were predictable. Only the mechanic course and the diplomat's module ever appealed to her. Norm had prospered in science and computers but had slacked off as the years passed.  

So now she had a new companion, Knight Titus of the Brotherhood of Steel. She had researched the US Army during firearms training. The power armor suit was the radest piece of tech she could never touch. The desire to see one in person had driven her to read the manual front to back, knowing every nook and cranny. So, when she saw Cooper circle the armor and slide his hands over the chest piece, under the ridge, she couldn’t help feeling a little possessive over another man's equipment.   

She finally weathered the bloated feeling that came with RadAway and woke up to Cooper and Titus in a heated glaring match over the fire they put together.  

“I’m guessing I missed something?” she chirped. Titus broke first and looked at her with concern. Cooper smirked and scoffed, taking out one of the whiskey bottles he nabbed and gulped a few.  

“I’m glad you’re okay. And I really want to say thank you for getting me out of the suit. But... why are you with the ghoul who shot up that town and nearly killed you?” this, Lucy knew, was a difficult topic to broach with someone who was about as well travelled as she was and lacked the experience with the wild wasteland that Cooper had.  

“Guess you could say it was an alliance of convenience. When you travel a couple days with some folk, you tend to grow attached.”  

“Uuumm, I think the Brotherhood scribes have a term for that in medical fields.”  

“Stolkholm, yes, I know. Look, the fact is, the topside is a complete mess. I can’t be a navigator on my own on a time limit. So yes, I outsourced.”  

“Well, maybe you can downsize to a new trio. I don’t trust his intentions.” He looked back to Cooper as he leaned back on his foldout. He dipped his hat low and smiled toothily.  

“Is that ‘cause I’m a ghoul Tin man? I guess that means we can’t go splitsies on the head. Racist.”   

Titus looked like he was about to snap back but Lucy calmed him. “That’s just his nature, NOT AS A GHOUL, as himself. He’ll try to get under your skin but for now our interests align.”  

“Wait, did you say head? I found a head!”  

“You did?” even Cooper perked up at that. 
“Well, me and my squire did. He took it and ran off. Even told me all those years was nothing personal. I’m glad I mashed his foot.” 

Cooper decided he needed to walk around some, so he dusted his legs off with his hat, “Squires, scribes, Brotherhood, back in the army it was a band of brothers not this religious hooplah y’all got goin’ on.”   

“Yeah, OK Boomer.” Titus spat.  

“The fuck you say to me?” Cooper was back in his face. 
“You were there, back when the bombs dropped. And you like to talk about when times were good. When you lived in a time when bombing was a stone's throw away. You guys blew up the world, you bunch of Boomers.” 

Lucy realized her attempts to placate weren’t going anywhere, so raised her gun and let off a round. The bang brought them back to their senses.   

“Clearly, we have a lot of bad blood. And yes, Cooper, I’m still pretty miffed about you cutting off my finger and forcing me to cannibalize another like you,” each rebuke made Titus widen his eyes, “but you know how to track. Even with our technology, we’d be lost in the swamp. However, having more eyes and ears will certainly help in the long run, right?”  

The two men stared at each other with annoyance, neither one willing to give up on their means to success. Finally, they relented and nodded once at each other in reluctant compliance.  

Titus decided to offer a handshake which Cooper grabbed and began shuffling Titus’ knuckles around beneath his skin in a tight grip. Then Titus leaned in, “Tin man? It’s tungsten steel and Poly carbide infused Kevlar.”  

“Fantastic, another one added to the pile.”  

Suddenly the sound of gun hammers being cocked was heard behind them. They turned and saw the opening of the undercarriage they were camped at was now guarded by a posse of five men holding rifles and dressed as cowboys. The leader stepped forward, resting the rifle over his shoulder while the remaining four stood firm and had their sights aimed.  

“Well well well, lookie what we got here. I should’ve guessed a bunch of no-good raiders would hol’ up near the scene of the crime.” he strode forward, cocky and condescending, lowering the glasses he wore at night to get a good look at the trio.  

“Please don’t shoot” Lucy called out, arms raised and beckoning the others to stand, “We have no quarrel with you. We were just making camp for the night, so we’ll be out of your hair by morning.” Titus tried inching towards the Power armor, to at least put it on and scare them off, though it did offer some bullet protection. He paused when one of the cowboys swiveled their sights directly at him.  

“Well now, you skedaddling outta here won’t be doing us any good, not since all of ya got a bounty on yer head.” The three of them stilled at that, unaware of just who was pressing charges and what the charges were.  

“Now, that don’t sit to kindly with me, what say we settle this quickly and not waste our time.” Cooper said as he reached for his gun. Lucy panicked and stepped in front of Cooper, wary that Jeeves was hidden in the corner for sleep mode. So they at least had some back up.  

“Please tell us, who you are and what are the charges.” The leader eyed her curiously, then decided to lower his gun from his shoulder.  

“The charges come courtesy of the remnant law enforcement of the once proud NCR. Those charges being the theft, vandalization and desecration of the Super-Duper Mart and the murder of its CEO’s.”  

“Well, you’ve got no proof that it was us in particular.” Lucy boasted, noticing out the corner of her eye Cooper kick a lock box close which he pilfered from their problematic exchange earlier.  

“You’re right, I’m sure I could ask the rest of the people here if they’ve seen anything. So many folks around nowadays to testify your innocence.” Lucy looked abashed at being caught out in a lie. Titus looked ready to book it for the armor and Cooper looked ready to start blasting. When the men started closing in, she realized she would need to try a different approach.  

“What if we tried working off our debt. Surely community service would be a better alternative than wasting those well-earned bullets.”  

The leader raised a hand and halted the others approach, “Keep talking.”  

---

UA Highschool, same time  

This training exercise was a fucking nightmare.  

First there was the fact he was limited to creating shadow tendril, ink tentacles. He wasn’t sure what to call them, but they certainly came in handy. Half the time. THe other half he was putting his peak physical conditioning to the test, pushing his side steps and distance running plus ultra. The other was the clever bits of inspiration from Luffy.   

He wasn’t sure he had the capacity to focus but somehow, he managed to demonstrate, or purposefully chose to show off, his devil fruit in action. Stretching the tendrils like Luffy’s arms and legs got him past the long jumps, toe touching (two girls were pissed that he and another called Shoji cheated to stretching by extending their appendages whilst fully upright) and grip strength. He saw Luffy inflating himself and got the idea to make, essentially, a giant fist out of multiple tendrils. He was crushing and punching things left and right.   

Uraraka, he saw was enamored with the application of such tendrils, having thought of a number of rescue ideas since she saw them in action rescuing her.  

But if he thought Luffy was a showoff, the sound of explosions brought his attention back to exhibit A, where Bakugo was blitzing every scenario in an attempt to demonstrate his quirk and tactical prowess. ‘ It’s still something to behold, seeing him in action, he certainly hasn’t been slacking since leaving me alone.’ However, each demo was accompanied by the ear-splitting boast of his excellence and the others lacking performance. Jiro, he saw, suffered the most, clenching her ears and sending him a dirty look each time.    

Iida excelled in speed but stumbled, literally, during hurdles. Yaoyorozu and Todoroki didn’t seem to be affected at all by the demands or threat of the test. They breezed through them like the recommended students they were.    

Now if only his sensei could get off their backs about not utilizing their quirks or giving them the evil eye while at the same time being so completely uninterested in everything around him.  

“Midoriya, phones are to be put away, we’re here to gauge your quirk, not run a social.”  

“Maybe his phone is part of his quirk, you don’t know.” Vi rushed out, Izuku mentally screaming at and subconsciously hi-fiving her. Aizawa’s eyes sharpened but didn’t necessarily redden. He really should have put in on silent after Luffy talked non-stop for two hours about fighting technique. ‘ Is that what I sound like when I mumble?’  

“Then if I were to use my quirk and encourage you to run a five K, you’d do it no problem right?” The class had stopped to look at this back and forth, even Bakugo was sent off kilter by Midoriya somehow growing enough of a backbone to backtalk a teacher.   

“...you don’t know what my quirk is do you?” At this the red in his eyes dimmed and he looked off to the side.  

“...no, I do.”  

“Then just as Aoyama is able to use a belt as part of his quirk apprehension test, this support tech should be valid.” Internally he was now shitting himself, he had no idea if he knew but decided to call his bluff.  

“Yeeeaaaaah, sure you can. Just making sure you're paying attention.” Izuku had no idea where all that came from but decided to turn and walk away before Aizawa could register what his student just said to him. Off on the other side of the building in the teachers' lounge, Present Mic and Midnight were suddenly stifling their laughter by biting on their fists, meanwhile Toshinori was sneakily staring aghast at his successor talking back against the strictest homeroom teacher in UA.  
It was impressive, mostly scary, but impressive. ‘Izuku never would have said anything like that all those months ago. That chat really is taking an effect on him.’ He would let him use the chat for now. In the long term, he was gaining more experience. In the short term, it would get him more friends. 

Mina, he recalled, popped into his periphery, “So, what exactly is you quirk?”. Midoriya began to panic, his mind knowing the answer was Superpower, a name he and All Might agreed upon, but he didn’t trust his mouth to not spill the beans, “I could ask the other part of your quirk...”  

His phones blipped to life.  

“Pretty sure it's being utterly distracted and singularly focus all at the same time.” Vi chimed in, much to the delighted chuckles of his classmates. It died down when Izuku failed to refute her. 
"He can also lift cars over his head!” piped up Luffy, encouraging a well-rounded Ooh’s and Ahh’s from the class. 
“So hang on a minute, how does that allow you to use your phone?” Kaminari questioned. Uraraka saw he was beginning to flounder and stepped in front of him to address the class. 
“Pretty sure the argument comes down to quirks are bullshit guys.” The rest began to cackle which spurred Aizawa’s red flash of eyes. Izuku was grateful that Uraraka had decided to intervene, not sure how to explain the phone or chat to his classmates yet. At the very least, he and Uraraka could take petty joy at seeing Iida have a mini-heart attack at swearing in front of their homeroom teacher. 

Finally, after all other tasks were completed, Izuku was called up to bat with the long throw. Bakugo had gotten nearly a kilometer, Yaoyarozu had gotten two, Uraraka had gotten inifinity (the implications were terrifying for if she ever got really mad at someone) and now here he was. Sweating, he readied his quirk. If what Luffy told him was true, if what Vi had taught him was right, he just needed to extend that strength, this black whip throughout his entire body. Like armor, flexible armor. The tendrils writhed and coiled from different spots on his body, wrapping around him until they encased his entire self. To the side, the rest of the class looked on in a mixture of awe and horror. Uraraka was holding onto his phone, especially since he almost crushed it last time. The raven headed Tokoyami was fascinated to see someone with a similar quirk to his. He mentally cataloged the prospects of using Dark Shadow as a cape like Midoriya is doing.  

Izuku recalled the video of Luffy throwing a fist like a slingshot and it gave him this idea. Ball in hand, he threw his arm back and stretched out a tendril until it reached the wall behind him. He dared a glance at Aizawa and he in turn gave an imperceptible nod. The tendrils tightened around his body as it surged with energy of OfA, then he coiled it all together and launched it forward. The speed was subsonic and the sharp halt in his follow through punch flung the ball like a slingshot off into the far distance of UA. Aizawa waited a moment and then...  

“Yikes, someone broke a window!” Kyoka yelped, ear lobes pointed in the direction of his throw. Then Aizawa showed it, 1000 meters in distance. And all Izuku had to show for it was a heavily bruised arm and two legs. He willed the black whip to bind his arm into a sling.  
“Woah, that was Awesome!” Called out Uraraka, the praise making Izuku feel humble that her dwarfing score would even compare to his paltry kilometer. Getting to the top three in the category wasn’t bad though. 

“What... the... FUCK! WHERE DID THAT COME FROM DEKU!?” Bakugo stormed forward, hands blitzing with pops and explosions. He snarled as he lunged, “Have you been hiding that this whole time you damn sadist!?”  

Unconsciously, Izuku began balling black whip into his other fist behind his back, crackles of green lightning beginning to trail all along and through his body. Tunnel vision blinded them both to Aizawa swinging out his capture scarf to snare the explody teen mid leap.  
"Cool it you little punk. I don't like having to dry my eyes out more than I need to. So don't force me to use my quirk during class. Bakugo, we'll talk later. Head back to the class and wait for me feedback."

Finally, Aizawa revealed the score listing. Izuku managed to score a ten, right in the middle. No doubt he had scored only middling points because he used his quirk only half the time and every time he was mildly injured. Yaoyarozu, Shoto and Bakugo excelled into the top three, of course. When they finally settled down and Aizawa revealed the true nature of the exam, Izuku finally felt the adrenaline wearing off.

“Midoriya, your phone isn’t really a part of your quirk is it?”  

“I guess you checked my file.”  

“Just a bit of revision, you’re not my only new student.” He of course brought up his file on his phone when no one was looking and skimmed through. ‘ I really should look at these in depth before each year. All the rest were corralled easily but not this problem child.’ He stood waiting for an answer while the staff looked on in concern they would be seeing another expulsion. “Care to explain.”  

“ Think of it as a rational deception.”  

A pause.  

Then Mina started giggling, then snorting, then laughing, then she leaned over, shoving her head into her arms to smother it. Kirishima was not so restrained.  

“OOOH, OOOOOOOH, DAMN.”  

“Ugh, dismissed so I can deal with this headache. Midoriya, you go on to Recovery Girl and see to those bruises. I’ll be expecting better turnaround for your quirk than simply getting stronger. You need to not get hurt.”  

Izuku, in his near fugue state of exhaustion, simply smiled, nodded and powered through the pain circulating his body, leaving Uraraka behind to hold his phone.  

She turned it over in her hands, trying to see how it worked and what link it shared to the sharp, stretchy tendrils surrounding Midoriya. She clicked the wrong button and the device sprang into life with the full audio text chat laid bare.  

 

Vi: Oh damn, did you see that launch, he must have knocked it out of the park with that one.  

 

Luffy: I’ve never seen my quirk outside of me before. That’s what I look like.  

 

Lucy: Stretchy bendyness, oh yeah. And it’s equally disturbing to see it in Izuku as well as you.  

 

Vi: Woaah, first Asians, now quirks and devil fruits. Is anyone safe in your world?  

 

Cooper: I know right, racist as shit.  

 

Lucy: Oh for fuck sake.  

 

Uraraka: Um, hello there. Is this Deku’s quirk?  

 

Angel: Yes, we like to keep him company on lonely nights.  

 

Vaggie: Oh no, Izuku must've left his phone behind.  

 

Lucy: Uh oh. This is a problem. Uraraka is it, please don’t read anything other than what’s in front of you right now.  

 

Jeeves: I do believe you have failed that speech check.  

 

Charlie: OK, so we had a mix-up. But come on, we don’t have to treat this like a problem, so long as she doesn’t read about-  

 

Uraraka: One for all. The heck is that?  

 

Cait: Oof. Jinxed it.  

 

Vi: Please don’t use that term.  

 

Charlie: So she read about it, but we still have a chance to turn this around. C’mon guys, let's talk to our new friend.  

 

Nami: Do you ever get negative about anything. This is a serious problem for him.  

 

Charlie: I’d rather avoid problems these days. I’d rather...  

 

Uraraka: Rather... what?  

 

Charlie: I’d rather, just, si-  

 

Vaggie: Cut that out, cut that out, we’re not going into a song while I'm here.  

 

Uraraka: Good because I was picking up music on my end, I swear it sounded like it was surround sound. And we’re out in the open.  

 

 

Notes:

SORRY!

I should've put out an update chapter to keep you guys in the loop. And here I see the authors who were inspiration for this fic are out there pumping out multiple chapters in a month. Basically, I've been inundated with encroaching deadlines for my work material and had to prioritise that. I don't like to split my focus too much.
It also doesn't help that instead of relaxing by writing like normal, I instead began Persona 5 Royal and have been speed running it at length.
What was up with Mona skipping out on us halfway through, that pissed me off to no end.

Anyway, we're back, we're here now, let's move on and progress.

Chapter 14: Good eating is hard to come by

Summary:

Everyone is hungry and now we throw a gourmet chef into the mix. Because that's how you make starving people feel better, show them pictures of food to tease them with.
At least these recipes don't come with a heavy handed backstory and superfluous details-OH WAIT!

Chapter 14  

 

Lucy: Hey guys, do any of you study law… specifically American Law? Specifically American Law circa 2077? American Law 2077 for the state of California?

 

Vi: OK, I want you to think about who you’re asking and try again.  

 

Lucy: You guys, I’m serious, we’re in a real pickle here. I’m trying to make a plea for community service in an involuntary manslaughter case.  

 

Midoriya: Wait, I thought it was all those ghouls who milled those two in the mall?  

 

Lucy: You’d think that, but… no.  

 

Cooper: Get this, those two bozos somehow set up their own version of surveillance security. Except it’s just a camera that snaps your picture the moment you step in.  

 

Maximus: It’s honestly pretty genius that they managed to salvage the cameras to make a CCTV system.  

 

Lucy: But yeah, because we caused the breakout of ghouls, we were responsible for their deaths.  

 

Cooper: WE! US! I didn’t fucking do anything!  

 

Lucy: You threw me into their clutches. I had to fight my way out, like anyone would in that situation.  

 

Izuku: Wait, even fighting for your life counts as breaking the law? But, but, they were murderers!  

 

Lucy: Even in the Vault we practiced- wait, do you not know that part of the law Izuku?  

 

Izuku: It’s not something I actively look into!  

 

Cait: You’re training to be a hero and you don’t know the law?  

 

Izuku: Honestly the law is an absolute mess of inconsistencies and speculation., especially when it comes to quirks.  

 

Lucy: Got it, don’t rely on you, next.  

 

Izuku: That’s not what I meant.  

 

Zoro: Got nada over here, just bounty hunter law.  

 

Usopp: I only represented a few clients but I’m not sure it would apply in your case.  

 

Nami: Pretty sure I’ve evaded law my whole life so I at least know the laws you’ve probably broken.  

 

Cait: I enforce Piltover law which I only recently see is very biased against the Lanes.  

 

Vi: THANK YOU, FINALLY!  

Ekko: Now she notices…  

 

Charlie: Celestial Law is not something I’ve investigated, most of my study has been in hotel management, psychology, psychiatry, philosophy and communication.   

Alastor: May want to look into that one Charlie. I don’t think the honor rule works among sinners.  

 

Vaggie: Especially since Heaven is of the Fuck you I do what I want variety when it comes to law.  

 

Baxter: Fascinating, I will have to pick you brain when it comes to understanding the moral platitudes of Heaven. Dantes always said-  

 

Vaggie: HEY CHARLIE! Didn’t you and Baxter have some kind of session to get to.  

 

Charlie: We absolutely will talk about this later Baxter but we have a therapy session coming up, let’s get to it.  

 

Baxter: But I-  

 

Luffy: I only know the law of the pirates  

 

Lucy: Pirates don’t have laws! What are you talking about?  

 

Izuku: Um, actually, Pirates normally did have laws, especially ones to keep the ship in order and prevent mutiny, especially when they cultivated large armada’s of their own ships.  

 

Uraraka: You know all that but don’t know about Japanese laws for heroes.  

 

Izuku: DO YOU!?   

 

Izuku: SORRY! That was very impolite.   

 

Uraraka: It’s cool Deku. I’m just ragging you.   

 

Cait: Wait, how are you able to communicate with us? I thought you gave Izuku back his phone after that freakout when he remembered the chat.  

 

Ekko: Thank you for that, I really needed a pick me up hearing your scream gradually get louder when you ran at her in a panic.   

 

Izuku: please forget that happened.  

 

Uraraka: No. I’m going to remember that mutter storm as my core High School memory.  

 

Lucy: Better than my high school memory of my first kiss.  

 

Uraraka: Seriously, kissing cousins, I thought that was just a fetish online.  

 

Angel: It is. And in real life for some sad sacks. We try to cater to their demands best as possible but apparently that audience is filled with connoisseurs who can root out if the performers are related or not.  

 

Uraraka: How did we get here?  

 

Nami: At least we’re not talking about the validity of cannibalism as a life style choice. I swear Luffy looked like he was contemplating it.  

 

Luffy: We need food.  

 

Zoro: Then why did you give away the food we got from Orange Town?  

 

Luffy: Because they need food.  

 

Nami: This is getting us nowhere, Luffy, I promise we’ll find food if it gets us out of this loop.  

 

Uraraka: I have to say, this is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me since I got my quirk. Thank you for letting me be part of this madness.  

 

Izuku: It will consume you. Even now, I feel my sanity slipping away. Any day now, I will snap. At least I can share it with someone.  

 

Lucy: This is adorable kids, really amazing. But, uh, could we please get back to the fact that I’M ON TRIAL!  

 

User: Enter a plea deal, in exchange for services rendered to the government, you will never enter their territory ever again under penalty of imprisonment.   

 

Lucy: Perfect, the voices in my head answered for me.  

 

User: No, the voices in my head answered you.  

 

Vi: Powder?  

 

User name changed to Powder  

 

Powder: Hiya sis. Long time no see. Funny story, this doodad just appeared right in front of me and-no, no, not doing that. It’s Jinx, get it right thecno-anomaly  

 

User name changed to Jinx  

 

Vi: Well I’m going to keep calling you Powder, your real name.  

 

User name changed to Powder  

 

Powder: That’s not up to you, my name, my choice. It’s Jinx.  

 

User name changed to Jinx  

 

Vi: POWDER  

 

Powder: JINX  

 

Vi: POWDER  

 

Powder: JINX  

 

User name changed to PowJinxPowJinxPow- Jinxter  

 

Jinxter: WHAT! NO!  

 

Vi: HA! Wait, that still sucks.  

 

Cait: VI, do you mind not arguing with the hex tab, it’s freaking out the enforcers.  

 

Ekko: Why did you let her have one of those things?  

 

Vi: I’ll answer you as soon as the little twerp says her name is Powder.  

 

Jinxter: That’s it, killing you all. Here comes the boom. I’m coming down there to sort this out.  

 

Ekko: Wait coming down here? How can you do that unless… Oh shi-  

 

Vi and Jinx have logged off  

 

Uraraka: That’s disconcerting.  

 

Izuku: We’ve seen this already, I’m pretty sure they’ll sort it out in a few minutes. Maybe I should get my mom to mediate if Lucy and Charlie are busy.  

 

Uraraka: Oh, I didn’t know she was a-  

 

Luffy: LAND HO  

 

Izuku: EXCUSE YOU!?  

 

Nami: Sorry, bad timing, I’m keeping the snail away from him from now on.  

 

Usopp: We finally found, well, not land exactly, what’s a Baratié?  

---

Meanwhile, in HELL  

 

“Alrighty then Baxter, you are my first appointment today. Shall we jump off from where we were yesterday?” The lounge was set up in a spacy room with a view of Hell in all its shame. The neon lights blinked against the red sky. At it’s very center, a pillar of fire beamed from ground to sky. Baxter Made himself comfortable on the chaise, while Charlie perched expectantly at the edge of her armchair. 
“Quite frankly, I am rather lax with regards to the whole droll affair. My hypothesis is what really matters. Your attempts at redemption, I postulate, is inconceivable. And this experiment would go much smoother if that slithering know-it-all Pentious would just pipe down.” 

“Oh dear, is Pentious being a bit too loud, I can always speak to him on your behalf. However, I find that being honest with your feelings is that truly changes things for the better. So…”  

---

“…how are you adapting to the hotel?” she leaned in closer, invading Crymini’s space. 
“Well, the hotels shitty, everyone keeps trying to talk to me and anytime I go out, paparazzi keep taking my picture or try to talk to me. Not to mention the fact I have mandatory therapy.” She huffed and reclined back into the chaise, turning her head from Charlie.  

“It might be helpful if you tried balancing out your conversation. Having a negative mindset is detrimental to your daily mental health.” Charlie tried to encourage, though this made her turn away more, “Alright, how about this..”  

---

“…now that you’re in Hell, what do you like to do? And how can that be improved by going to Heaven?” Charlie leaned back, teetering on standing and walking around or remaining seated while the two fallen supervillains pondered their answer.  

“Well…our experiments do rely on human test subjects and Hell is positively teaming with them. I doubt Heaven will be as lenient as you have been.” Lyle proposed, Loopty next to him was playing around with a new gadget that looked not unlike Pentious’ death ray. He twisted one screw too tight and a flash of red energy blasted the fireplace, bursting the logs into flames.  

“Ah yes, the volunteers, umm, could it be possible that you not lure them here under false pretenses? It’s making it difficult to gain new patients. Or at the very least, could you let the volunteers... live?”  

Loopty stood atop the chaise, Lyle rolling over to join him in staring off into the middle distance, “Suffering is the mother of all invention. Otherwise Mr Wackford wouldn’t be buying our wares.”  

Lyle decided to roll over to the window, “Exactly, our devices of suffering has put us on the map. In life our customers were a diverse range of Billionaire and Trillionaire. Now we have those same customers down here.” He gestured out the window towards a billboard with their faces claiming ‘Hurt. Good!’ and Wackford Emporium labelled across the top.  

“Uh huh, circling back to that later…”  

---

“…where do you see yourself in one year from todays session?” Charlie was standing by the fireplace, poking at the roaring fire, trying to put it out as it roared out of the safety of the hearth.   

Pentious reared back, shielding the Egg Boii’s from being cooked, “Miss Charlie, are you sure you don’t need help? I have developed a brand new freeze ray that I am sure is to work.”  

Charlie removed her jacket and whipped at the licking flames, “No, no, all good, nothing to worry about, I figured we could do with some extra heat.”  

“Princess, we are in Hell. I’m not sure it could possibly get any hotter.”  

Charlie stopped and rested her head on the mantle, then pepped up and turned, “Exactly right. So let’s get to bottom of this. Baxter say’s you’ve been a bit loud at night.” 
“Baxter is just as loud as I am. I have to sing my Egg Boii’s to sleep with all his explosions and zapping and causing the lights to short out.” 

“Yeah it’s a major problem with the electricity bill. Wait, why am I talking about the electricity bill like we actually pay for power?”  

“Probably because of that group chat you are apart of. It’s deeply fascinating, communication across worlds and to those who are still mortal. We could talk to the living and find out all about a world outside of ours. At least it will be far more lively.”  

Charlie paused and turned to him, “Pentious, how much does Hell make you suffer?”  

---

“It’s positively mad. I’ve never seen such rampant insanity outside of pool parties with our richer friends. And not nearly as much debauchery outside of those pools filled with baby oil.” Loopty explained, the two now strutting around the lounge like they owned the place. 
“It’s encouraging to see other creative geniuses like ourselves. This creates an opportunity for competitive markets to corner.” Lyle pointed out, though it seemed like neither were as enthusiastic as they were at the start. 
“Uhuh, and how does that really make you feel?” 

---

“Really damn shitty if you ask me,” exploded Crymini, “everyone’s very fat, everyone’s very stupid and everyone’s obnoxious.”  

She huffed and sat upright, looking out the window, contemplating the presence of the media outside. Charlie decided to help her out.   

“So Hell is definitely not your cup of tea. I get that, so maybe you can meet me halfway here. You’d like to get out of here, maybe consider that is why you come here everyday.”  

“I come here everyday because this place is a shithole, I live in a shithole and my life was a shithole before I even got here.” She paused when she realized what she said and recoiled away, “I mean, you’ve only ever known Hell. Then you got that shitty app that lets you talk to topsiders and makes you think we have a chance up there.”  

Charlie began to relax into her chair, reclining back and closing her notebook.  

“Alright then, is the chat app a factor in how you’re feeling right now.?”  

---

“It certainly feels exciting to be in the presence of such a device. If you would allow me to run my experiments, we might be able to discern it’s secrets, perhaps even use it as a means of escape!” Baxter exposited, his pompous nature declining the more she talked about the chat app.  

Charlie perked up and leaned forward, clasping her hands under her chin and crossing her legs.  

“Interesting, so you believe the technology could be used to, oh I don’t know, jump across reality.” 
Baxter sniffed indignantly, offended by her blasé tone and rudimentary explanation. 
“Traverse Universes, I’d prefer to say. But yes, it will take some time to explore the technology and replicate it’s appropriate abilities.” 

Her grin widened a smidge, then she unfurled her book and jotted down another note. One that would give her some insight on how to progress with each of them. 
“So this brings up a question; if we could suddenly transmit ourselves back to the mortal realm, what would you go there for?” 

---

“Conquer and vanquish the enemies who outlived me.” Said Pentious.  

---

“Bring in a new batch of poors.” Said Lyle and Loopty in unison.   

---

  “Boast to my peers.” said Baxter.  

---

“Revenge.” Said Crymini.  

 

“Right. All those people who are more than likely dead or want nothing to do with you. A riveting use of the ability to visit the living.” At this, her patients stilled. They looked at anywhere other than Charlie who maintained eye-contact, grilling them about their responses, “I want to hear you say honestly what you would do. The chance to travel to the mortal realm and talk to the people. To be where the people are.” None of them responded, none of them had the slightest clue, “If those who knew and loved us could see us, from where we were only seconds before.”  

---

“I’m sorry.” Said Pentious.  

---

“I don’t forgive you.” Said Crymini.  

---

“Is this all we ever do?” said Lyle while Loopty was pensive.  

---

“Was I wrong in my hypothesis?” said Baxter. 
“Your redemption hypothesis or… the one before you… came here?” asked Charlie, resting her head on her hand and waiting. 
“I-” 

A sound of crashing was heard as the front doors fell in and a stampede of sorts came in. Vaggie hammered her hand on the door and came in, spear ready.  

“Piece of shit paparazzi came in with Vee backing. They want some questions answered about the redemption plan. I don’t think they’ve seen this many Overlords collaborate on a single project. That or Vox ordered them all here to harass us.”  

Charlie stood and straightened out her suit jacket but stopped and realized he suit was entirely smoke and soot stained. With a wave of her hand, fire flared around her and transformed her suit into a brand new style, clean and pressed.  

As they neared the foyer, Alastor hung back, still not willing to place himself before the camera. As Charlie passed him, she passed over her pentascroll and gestured him to hide it. He nodded and pocketed the scroll, smiling widely at having access to the chat. 
“What was that about?” Vaggie asked. 
“Don’t want the chat going off in the middle of this. I’d like to send them packing but I don’t want them sticking around and asking questions if it suddenly goes off mid-conversation. Plus they expect to see you with me. Can’t do it without you babe.” The two smiled and stood before the mass crowd. Alastor flicked through the chat, seeing new updates from their allies. Something new caught his eye. 

A steaming plate of fresh risotto with decadent seafood. Luffy, it seemed, was eagerly sending on a stream of pictures after finally getting access to his desired food.  

---

Beratié, East Blue  

  Sanji was having a day.  

“So let me get this straight. You’re a pirate.”  

“Yup.”  

“You’re looking for the One Piece.”  

“Yup.”  

“You set out without a cook, a doctor or even a navigator and somehow you think you’re going to become King of the Pirates.”  

“Definitely.”  

“Well I can’t rail you for being optimistic. Though I don’t think you’re getting far without a good supply of food. So tell me, how are you planning on leaving here. My foods good but even that can’t sustain you for more than a few days.”  

Luffy lazily wiped off another plate and stacked it atop the other crudely cleansed crockery. Sanji for his part was overjoyed that someone came along crazy enough to get on Red-leg Zeff’s bad side. At least he would be entertained for the next year the chore boy would be cleaning the dishes.  
“You should come with me. I need a capable crew and especially someone who cooks like you. Everyone else likes your food.” 
“Is that right? Then maybe the lovely lady has taste despite shaking up with the likes of you.” 

“If you come with us, you could spend more time with her.”  

His smile dipped even when he tried to keep it steady, the cigarette smoldered away in his grip and he stared sharply at Luffy. 
“I know you mean well and want to get a move on. But never offer up a woman as incentive if you want to get ahead in life.” Sanji took a deep drag and released a strained breath. 
“That’s fair. I guess I should try a different method to get you to join.” Luffy smiled, meanwhile Gin was glancing between the two, confused by how casually they spoke about seeking the myths of the sea. 

A buzzing from under Luffy’s hat drew their attention. He removed his hat to reveal the Chat snail sitting on his head. Neither Sanji or Gin knew what to make of it until it began projecting a large screen from its eyes showing a collection of conversation bubbles. The latest came in.  

“Oh, tasty, that looks like fine cuisine. May I send my compliments to the chef.” Alastor’s voice reverberated out in his usual radio crackle.  Sanji saw what he meant though, as pictures of the Baratie full course Luffy and his crew ordered were on display. 
“Oh man, you haven’t seen anything, check this out.” Luffy said as he rounded the snail on the True-Blue Fin sauté still sitting on the pile of unwashed dishes. He pressed a button on the back and snapped a picture that appeared in the chat. 

“What is that?” Sanji asked, glancing at the curious snail device, unlike any Den Den Mushi he’d seen before. 
“Just wanted to let them know I got the best cook in the whole sea to join my crew. Now to finish what I started.” Luffy picked up the place and with an elastic jaw, opened wide enough to seal his lips over the entire plate and vacuum up its contents into his gullet, “Ah, that hit the spot.” 

“Wait, you mean they’ve seen my food?” Sanji asked, any disgust at what he’d witnessed ignored, unlike Gin who recoiled at the sight, Sanji was too chuffed at the thought his cooking had an audience.  

Uraraka: Seen and salivating over.  

 

Cait: Looks better than any dish my staff has cooked.  

 

Jinxter: Could you not lord your wealth over us in every conversation topic.  

 

Vi: Weren’t you just about to blow us up?  

 

Jinxter: Yeah but then I saw this food and got distracted. I haven’t eaten gourmet... ever. Seriously, if this is what the Pilties eat, no wonder you betrayed everything you stood for.  

 

VI: Can you be any pettier? Seriously, it’s dripping off you like paint.  

 

Cait: Actually, that’s just paint dripping off her.  

 

Jinxter: I was rushing, get off my back.  

 

Izuku: It’s too much. I just want to binge but I can’t. I was told to try a keto diet to curb my carb intake. Why do you tempt me Luffy?  

 

“Keto. I have a good low fat, high calorie alternative if you prefer some recipes. Just keep in mind, I won’t tolerate waste.” Sanji responded, beaming with pride.  

 

Izuku: You’re a god send.  

 

Uraraka: I’m pretty sure that’s Charlie, right Deku?  

 

Izuku: Oooh, yeah, I mean yeah, I mean yes, totally, hahaha.  

 

“Take it easy there Casanova, no need to be too eager to impress lady. Need a little restraint is all.” Sanji pointed out much to Luffy’s confusion.  

 

Izuku: WHAT!? No, no no, no, it’s not like that, I mean, it’s not not like that... why was it so much easier to talk earlier?  

 

Vi: Because you were in the zone man, you locked in and didn’t care about what you said.  

 

Jinxter: Got it, so that’s how you can be so smooth around the Piltie.  

 

Vi: You little shit, I will deck you!  

 

Jinxter: Only if you can catch me. Yo, smooth-talker, Imma need some of those recipes too.  

 

Cait: She needs it. Looks like an anorexic real girl doll.  

 

Jinxter: Oh yeah, well, at least, I don’t... at least I... dangit your flawless, no wonder Vi is falling all over you!  

 

Vi: I AM NOT.  

 

Jinxter: Maybe you need a scar or something to really even it out.  

 

Vi: Don’t you touch her!  

 

Cait: Me thinks you doth protest too much.  

 

Vi: Who’s side are you on? I thought you hated each other, why are you ganging up on me?  

 

Lucy: Are we ganging up on VI? What did I miss?  

 

Jinxter: See, I hate her but I also hate you, so it’s free game for both of you.  

 

Cooper: Now that is some tasty lookin’ brisket. MmmMm, bet it falls right off the bone. Haven’t seen a good lookin’ dish like that since my wife... might be able to whip us up some brahmin brisket if we have the time and the meat.  

 

User: This is incredible. You’re using your pip-boy to transmit images. Not sure if this is a trap to lure us somewhere or if someone's trying to torture us with this beautiful food.  

 

Lucy: It sure is a nifty little doodad but it’s great for communication.  

 

User: You can use that to contact others! Who? How?  

 

Cooper: Woah woah woah machismo, cool the beans and quit crawlin’ all over the little lady.  

 

User: ...I’m not crawling. Sorry Lucy.  

 

Lucy: It’s okay Titus.  

 

User name change to Titus.  

 

Izuku: I thought you guys were in court.  

 

Titus: We were sentenced in a kangaroo court, those guys were judge, jury and, if we didn’t comply, executioner.  

 

Lucy: Now we are on a mission to find some bounties for them. I don’t like it but maybe if we bring them in alive, they can get a fair trial. RIght?  

 

Cooper: ...folks, can I get a collective face palm, I really want the message to stick.  

 

Vi/Cait/Jinxter/User/Luffy/Cooper/Titus/Jeeves/Alastor: SMACK!  

 

Cooper: Thank you.  

 

Lucy: OK I GET IT!  

 

Sanji looked at Luffy who didn’t seem to mind all the chaos unfolding before him, taking heaping spoonfuls from the leftover risotto he made for Gin. Gin meanwhile was slowly inching his way back towards the door he entered, hoping to escape the madness. That was until Zeff, in all his tall chef hatted and beautifully mustached glory. His peg leg clacked next to Luffy, listening to the incoming comments and praise of cooking.  

“What’s all this then?” Luffy and Sanji turned to Zeff with his arms crossed and cocked eyebrow, “You’re supposed to be workin’ chore boy, and you are meant to be out there bussing tables.” He pointed at both.  

Jinxter: Ah man, the guy was just a waiter this whole time!  

 

Cooper: He dreams of one day working the line.  

 

Uraraka: Boo, I thought you were awesome.  

 

“Yeah you jerk, you lied to us.” accused Luffy. Both Gin and Sanji stared at him wide eyed in exasperation, Sanji gesturing helplessly to the dish in front of Gin. 
“You saw me cooking... How do you not remember that!?” Sanji cried in frustration. Zeff hobbled over to the dish which Gin retreated from, though more than likely he back tracked away from Zeff, having recognized the blood thirsty legend. 
“Cooking were you? I thought I told you you’re cooking was crap. It has no place in my kitchen.” Zeff asked. Sanji’s face bore an impassive look that brooked neither shame nor ire. He just stared back. 

“If he wants to cook, he should. You can’t stop him old man.” Zeff side eyed Luffy with amusement, while Sanji looked fit to combust. 
“Hey, you can’t call him that. Only I can.” 
“If he’s working on staff, that’s pretty much par for course ‘round here.” chuckled Zeff. Sanji relaxed and chuckled to himself. Luffy laughed along cluelessly. 

Gin was horrified to realize the three of them were crazy.  

Izuku: Speaking from experience, huh Luffy?  

 

Jinxter: Right for the throat, damn, I thought you were supposed to be the goody two-shoes.  

 

Husk: Guess we got another for the tally, Grand-daddy issues to mix with the rest.  

Luffy for his part, was surprisingly silent and turned back to the dishes, taking care with each dish. His quiet was disquieting for the chat and assembly. Zerff decided to intervene.  

“Well, if you cooked that for him, can’t let a good meal go unpaid, newbie, you got duties tomorrow to pay for that meal, pick a bunk and get ready for morning.” Gin was shocked to here an invitation for room and board, even if it was involuntary servitude to pay for a meal. But he was no longer hungry and he could recover his strength. Sanji smiled and nodded to him in reassurance. Gin took off for the bunks and Luffy’s smile widened slightly. 
 

Izuku: That’s so nice of you Chef.  

 

“At Baratié, no one goes hungry.” Sanji explained.  

 

Cooper: Then I tip my hat to you, from one starved survivor to another.  

 

Vi: Eat to live...  

 

Jinxter:...don’t live to eat.  

 

“I like that idea.” smiled Luffy, though that was met with protestations from both Zeff and the Chat.  

 

Vi: Bullshit, you do nothing but eat.  

 

Alastor: I’ve seen less gluttonous terrors in the Third Ring of Hell!  

 

Jeeves: If we had half your portions, I could whip up a gourmet meal for seven after I cut it out of your belly.  

 

“Who’s the one who ate so much they owe me a years' worth of wages to pay off their bill?” Zeff barked, though without much heat.  

 

Uraraka: Wait, a YEAR! How much do you pay for these meals?  

 

Cait: If I had to guess, no more than a regular Piltover banquet that my parents hold to boast their status.  

 

Uraraka: How much do YOU pay for meals!?  

 

Sanji, for the first time since Luffy met him, laughed loudly with a cheeky smile, “If this is the chaos you deal with on a daily basis, you may just convince me to join, chore boy.”  

Just then, the entrance to the Kitchen burst open as Usopp came stumbling towards Luffy with a look of panic on his face, “Luffy, we need help. Zoro just challenged a warlord to a duel, Nami’s freaking out and I think we’ve added onto the tab with all our drinks. So I guess if you’re stuck here for two years, then I gladly volunteer myself for captain.”  

“As my loyal crew, you will stay by my side until my tab is paid in full.”  

“I think the part about the warlord is more pressing chore boy.”  

“Hm.”  

Notes:

Now we're cooking with diesel or however the phrase goes. Except my engine in a 50cc go-kart that's puttering along. I'll get to the next chapter eventually but I need to make sure I enjoy the ride.

Where do we think this is going? Especially when three major battles are about to take place for three of our protagonists.

Chapter 15: Battle of self discovery part 1

Summary:

Part 1 of the triumvirate of character defining battles with a couple changes to spice things up. Soon, cannon will be driven completely off the rails and drowned so that not even Usopp could fire it.

 

Charlie could finally collapse onto her bed. The media hounds had gnawed at the barebones story about her hotel. On one hand, she was getting publicity, which would attract willing applicants. On the other hand, it wasn’t the publicity she wanted, the deluge of comments about prison camp environments and lackluster treatments rankled her. Not the least was one comment made about taking on bribes from the Overlords or how she somehow coerced them into her pocket. The Vees were making a statement to Hell and the Overlords would not be happy about the insinuations.  

Being the Princess and the public face of the Royal family meant she handled it with poise and deference. 
But as a being with the mentality of someone in their mid-twenties, she immediately face planted into a pillow and screamed until it popped when it was over. Vaggie drew comforting circles on her back and sat patiently until she finished. 

“So I got your phone back from Alastor. He was laughing like nuts in his room. I’m guessing the chat said something to set him off.” Charlie gratefully retrieved her phone and decided to scroll through it. Vaggie lay down next to her.  

“Having him talk would just get the news talking. Killjoy asked if I was finally exerting my control over the Overlords since I managed to get so many of them in my employ. Man, it’s like they relish in my suffering rather than stewing in their own.” 
“That’s how Hell is sweetie. I’m guessing the Vees have some long con to discredit us since they can’t get a mole in.” 
“Good thing I did the talking and not Alastor. The Vees are already out for our necks, no need for him to throw corpses onto the pyre.” 

“Speaking of, what was he laughing at. Probably something about someone, somewhere suffering.”  

Charlie closed the news app and opened up the chat. On it was a long string of text and recordings arguing about duels to the death. “Oh crap.”  

---

Camp 1- Team Nami vs Camp 2 – Team Zoro  

Zoro: All of you need to butt out. I already made my choice.  

 

Nami: But since it’s a stupid choice, I’ve elected to ignore it.  

 

Usopp: Is it too late for drinks, because I think we need drinks.  

 

Nami: You need to be cut off. I’m surprised you didn’t pull Mihawk onto a table and do a jig.  

 

Charlie: Who’s Mihawk and why are we dancing?  

 

Luffy: Usopps dancing, Zoro’s fighting Mihawk and Nami is fighting Zoro.  

 

Vaggie: And you are?  

 

Luffy: Having fun.  

 

Midoriya: Par for the course at this stage.  

 

Zoro: Look, I don’t know why you’re getting so uppity about all this, this is my choice.  

 

Nami: Maybe because you’ll be throwing your life away to fight not only one of the most dangerous pirates in the five seas but the most skilled swordsman in the world.  

 

Luffy: Eh, Shanks could take him.  

 

Usopp: …in a fight, right?  

 

Izuku: Is now the time for power scaling? Look, it’s late, clearly we’re exhausted, now’s not the time to be making life changing decisions.  

 

Nami: At least someone is making sense.  

 

Zoro: The one with the self-destructive powers.  

 

Nami: …Where’s Lucy and Cait, they’re normally the ones to talk about taking responsibility.   

 

Zoro: I am taking responsibility, for my own destiny. This is an opportunity I can’t pass up, the worlds greatest swordsman doesn’t come round to East Blue everyday.  

 

Luffy: Hey yeah, why was he here any way?  

 

Nami: Because Vice-Admiral Grandpa decided to send a warlord after you.  

 

Charlie: ugh, can we not talk about lords, I already have five of them breathing down my neck for this project.  

 

Uraraka: Where are Vi and Jinx for that matter. They’re normally here.  

 

Zoro: Yes, they would take my side and explain why I need to do this.  

 

Izuku: OK, why do you need to do this?  

 

Zoro: Ask Luffy. You remember what I said to you tied up on that cross?  

 

Uraraka: I’m bigger than Jesus?  

 

Zoro: Don’t know who that is, that joke falls flat. NO. You remember Luffy?  

 

Vaggie: No offence but can you trust Luffy to remember anything articulately?  

 

Luffy: To be the world’s greatest swordsman. That’s your dream.  

 

Zoro: Yeah… you remembered.  

 

Charlie: Seems pointless to die at this stage if you haven’t got the right stuff to fight him.  

 

Izuku: A dream is an ideal to drive you forward, a mountain to summit, not a hill to die on.  

 

Nami: If you want the validation, you got it. I’ve seen you fight and believe me, I’ve been as far as the south blue, you are better than any I’ve ever fought.  

 

Uraraka: No.  

 

Izuku: Uraraka?  

 

Uraraka: You can’t miss this shot. Going after your dream means seizing your moment and going beyond, plus ultra.  

 

Vaggie: Plus Ultra? I like it. It makes sense, if you want to be the best you gotta be willing to make the sacrifice. You can’t just go with the flow, not if there might be something better on the horizon.  

 

Charlie: But Vaggie, what if he gets hurt? I’d never ask you to throw your life away just to prove you’re the strongest.  

 

Vaggie: Then I do whatever it takes. I’ll spend my life making mistakes if it means I get to be your armor.  

 

Izuku: And Uraraka, you’re really encouraging him to fight.  

 

Uraraka: In order to be the best hero, then we’ve gotta push ourselves. You taught me that when you unleashed your quirk for the first time just to save me. Not only that but going all out meant you got your spot in UA.  

 

Zoro: I’ve made up my mind, I’m not giving this up. Plus ultra, right Uraraka?  

 

Uraraka: Plus Ultra.  

 

Vaggie: Plus Ultra.  

 

Charlie: I’m really feeling it y’know.  

 

Nami: Am I the only sane one here?  

 

Luffy: It’s his dream Nami. I can’t stand in his way any more than you can.  

 

Zoro: This is eating into my prep time. Same with the rest of you or do you all just not care about tomorrow.  

 

Nami: I care because you’re my friend you idiot.  

 

Zoro: …maybe…  

 

Lucy: God this thing is making a racket, what did I miss?  

---

Going Merry, Beratie, East Blue

Zoro sat at his blades readying his mind for tomorrows duel. He would test his mettle and he would prove his worth. Luffy, it seemed, was content to try and explain Zoro's choice as simply as possible to the rest of the chat. Zoro smiled gently at his faith in him, he was so simple with his belief and yet he was content to listen. Usopp pulled himself away from the bucket he was decorating with his vomit to sit slumped over next to Zoro. Zoro wasn't sure what to make of this sniper. Using the frying pan was smart, he'll give him that, his strategy was certainly a nice change of pace compared to Nami, Luffy and his plans of finding as many enemies as possible and kick their asses. 

"Hey Luffy, bring that snail over here. I just had a thought. Why not give Zoro here an advantage in his battle?"

Zoro huffed in defiance. but Luffy decided to perch next to Zoro also and smiled knowingly at Usopp. "Ooh, that sounds like a cool idea... if he were fighting a bunch of pirates that have us outnumbered. But this is a duel Usopp. To be a brave warrior you have to be able to fight your own battles, no outside interference."

Usopp wanted to protest but Zoro glared sharply at him and he relented, choosing not to say anything. So he thought, and thought, until the chat chimed with new information.

Titus: Anything can happen in a battle and the best warriors, I found, always fought with whatever they had on hand.

"Exactly," Usopp agreed, he held up the snail as if it were Titus contributing, "fog of war and all that. After all, you can't be held accountable for the unexpected happening, say, your sword hitting something that covers it in poison and it kills instantly the next guy it touches."

Titus: Or accidentally cutting something that causes something to fall on the other guy. Maybe you get in close and you through a haymaker to the ear. Can't fight when you're discombobulated.

"If either of you interfere in my fight, I will personally turn you into the worlds first unwilling sword swallower."Both Usopp and Maximus held their necks and gulped. However, an innuendo doesn't go unnoticed.

Angel: I volunteer as tribute. Got any swords you'd like me to swallow? 

Zoro groaned in annoyance and decided to drown out the annoyances with booze.

Angel: Ay, take it from somebody who knows what it's like to fight for your honor and go down swinging... it ain't worth playing fair. A fight means using everything to win. Even if it means givin' a kick to the old family jewels.

Cooper:  I found it best to get a little dirt in their eyes. You don't get to live as long as me and not have a few dirty tricks up my sleeve. You honestly think a guy who calls himself warlord always plays by the rules.

"He does. That's why they made him warlord. He's too good, without cheats, without flashy moves, he just knows how to make the right cut. If I can't win against him in straight skill then how will I know how far I've gotten." Zoro explained.

Titus: I'm all for fighting against your limit. I also know about fighting for your life. 

"And what do you know about proving yourself?"

Titus: The Brotherhood of Steel is all about the strongest. I've toiled in latrine duty and polishing the suits of armor until they gleamed in the sunlight. I didn't get here by being the strongest, there were others who were stronger. I didn't get here by being the best knight, my own squire running off on me proved that...

"Is there a harbour between here and your point?"

Angel: Using that one later.

Titus: Mihawk fights this way because that's all he's ever known. He's had years to fight like a professional. But even he had to start off fighting dirty. To climb the ranks of warlord.

"Way I see it Zoro, you can be like every other swords man this Mihawk, warlord has ever met. Or, you can be something brand new and exciting!" Usopp wiggled his eyebrows in temptation. Luffy tilted his head like a dog, slowly coming around on the idea.

Zoro bowed his head and recalled something Kuina said, "He'll get bigger and stronger, while she will remain just the same". But despite that, she always trounced even the older students because she used her size to slip under them, her speed to strike quickly and her sword to hit... 'Wait, she had great grade sword she used to fight... all i had were bulk made blades, like these other two... did she... always have that advantage, NO... we used bokken but in live steel, no wonder she could swing at me with all her might, my swords would have broken before hers even chipped.'
He looked at a grinning Luffy and Usopp and sighed, "I'll fight him on my own terms, only blades. But if some stuff is there that just so happens to give me an advantage, leave me out of it."  He grinned mutely and Usopp took the opportunity to run out past an irate Nami, who looked like she cooled somewhat upon hearing Zoro's compromise. Usopp, meanwhile, was searching for a fishmonger.

---

 

UA High, Japan  

Fate really wanted to test Izuku’s newfound resolve by pitting him against Bakugo. Since yesterday’s reunion at their first day of UA together, Bakugo had been burning holes in the back of his neck. And his shirt, if the burn marks were any indication. His inability to go after Izuku thanks to Aizawa’s timely intervention meant he was stewing in the nitro sweat of quiet fury. He watched Izuku as he tried to diligently pay attention to lessons, how he, Uraraka and Iida had formed a tight knit circle. It didn’t rankle Bakugo so much that he had friends but that he was somehow able to ignore him. Izuku had no idea what to think about this. On one hand, Bakugo made it clear he didn’t want Izuku riding his coattails or fawning over him like a lost puppy. But the moment that happens, he is incensed that Izuku now refused to acknowledge him now that he made it into UA.  

Bakugo stared at Izuku now, confused, fidgeting in wait for the arrival of their new Heroics instructor. The two of them, like Yaoyarozu, had deduced based on their own deductions who it was. But Bakugo couldn’t bring himself to fanboy like he saw Izuku was doing. Izuku confused him. Or rather, Bakugo was confused about how to feel about Izuku.  
He no longer called him by the irritatingly childish nickname of Kacchan, but it somehow felt weird to hear Izuku address him as Bakugo. 
He wanted to avoid Izuku’s constant need to be near him but now he was swimming in a bigger pond with hero extras who showed him up yesterday and Izuku was the only one who knew his true potential. 

Izuku would try and act like a hero even when he had no quirk but somehow he possessed some bizarre black energy power and was riding the high of having popularity in class for being curt with Aizawa and having friends who didn’t act like bootlikers.  

He festered during homework with these thoughts, completing the work like the multi-tasker he was. But he could be angry and analytical at the same time. He had a lifetime of practice.  

So when All Might announced they would be having combat trials, glee flooded him to the point of mania. He would extract his pound of flesh from Midoriya for thinking he could ignore him now that he was in the big leagues and he would get answers to why Deku had a power he kept hidden for years.  

---

UA Ground Beta  

If there was anything Izuku loved more than quirks, it was an awesome hero uniform. Costumes were part of the battle against villains, a statement of who they were and why they are here. So Izuku may have taken some inspiration from the people who got him here. His mom had encouraged him and shown her support by sowing his hero costume together. At least, the base of it. From there he added in the antenna to mimic All Mights hair prongs. Then he added some special gauntlets to protect his fists and arms from the explosive power of One for All modelled after Vi’s punching style, he went sleeveless to avoid tears and rips when he used Black Whip like Luffy using his rubber powers, his suit base design was altered to feature a red and green color scheme to commemorate Charlie. And around his waist he wore a bandoleer of tranquilizer darts and wore armored pieces modelled after Lucy’s outfit. Inko had to admit, the streamlined, flexible design of the Vault suit was her primary inspiration for tailoring. She was grateful Lucy was able to find a template for the vault suit hidden in the data banks of Jeeves.  

As Izuku stretched out the suit to increase his mobility, he took the time to look at the rest of his assembled classmates. Some were flashy like Aoyama or Mina. Some were pragmatic like Kyoka or Tokoyami. And some were dynamic like Iida and Tsuyu. But a lot of the girls in his class left him blushing up a storm. They had a lot to be confident about and had clearly worked hard. He could at least admire their boldness, thanks to Angel and Nami teasing him in the chat so many times, he could handle this.  

That was until Uraraka came bouncing up to him in a suit reminiscent of an astronaut. Just, curvier. She had mentioned to him she was a Thirteen fan, but it seems she had taken on some inspiration from the chat too. One of those was a pair of heavy-duty astronaut boots with gas cannisters linked to them.  

“Hey Deku, nice suit. It’s like a hodgepodge of whole buncha stuff.” Uraraka beamed at the assortment he had on, especially what looked like a pair of bunny ears on top. She reached out her hand to poke one ear and Izuku stilled.  

He tried not to focus on how good she looked or the skin tight nature, as she bashfully turned her body away from him and folded her arms. Instead, he opted to focus on her equipment. 
“And I see those boots; can you fly in them?” 

“If by fly you mean hover aimlessly in zero gravity, then yes. I only asked them as a concept to be added later on, but someone pulled out an all-nighter to get them attached.”  

“From the power armor, right?” 
“That stuff is so cool. I would kill to drive one of those things. I only saw a picture, but I saw those boots and those rockets, and I just thought, what the heck.” Her bashful nature subsided, and she cheerfully spoke about her gadgets. All Might seldom used gadgets and told him he shouldn’t rely on them. But he also said he would be at a disadvantage and to avoid breaking himself he should get some adjustments to help the learning curve. 

He felt a sharp nudge to his back and he fell forward into Uraraka, behind him Bakugo skulked forward, snapping back at him, “Heads out of the clouds Deku, you got shit to do.” 
Uraraka blushed and pouted at the same time, adjusting Izuku back off her and scowling, “What’s his problem? He’s the guy who called you Deku yesterday, right?” 

Izuku glanced quizzically at Bakugo, “He has a chip on his shoulder, I guess. He only called me Deku because he thought it was a good joke back when we were kids. I guess it stuck.”  

“And here I thought you were Dekiru and he was just illiterate.”  

“Illiterate!”  

“Yeah, you know, Dekiru. Super determined. Kind of like Luffy. I remember how you kept try to move after busting up your arms and- Oh sorry, that’s really rude. I just meant you always get this determined look on your face.”  

“I guess I’m filled with determination, huh?” He smiled thinly but she tittered good naturedly, giving him a thumbs up.   

All Might gathered and explained the task. Teams of two v two. He drew lots to make them random and unfortunate for Iida but fortunate for Izuku, he and Bakugo were in a team.  

 At least he wouldn’t be working with Bakugo.    

Test Start  

No, he was against Bakugo, who had carte blanche in a hero school with the heal all nurse to go all out.  

He was seriously doubting if now was the time to test out what he learned from the chat. He hadn’t mastered Luffy’s stretching punches or Vi’s brawling skills. But he could take into account what being punched felt like. Toshinori went depowered mode and practiced taking hits and falling. Even deflated, Toshi could split his lip and kick his ass. But it was better than just being told to punch over and over in the same motion. Waiting outside the test building, he and Uraraka hyped themselves up before the test start.  

“You got any plans for those two? Bakugo is pretty strong and Iida is no slouch when it comes to speed.” 
“You got that right,” he locked in, time to strategize, “Iida won’t be able to maneuver as well in the tight corridors but we can’t rule out him patrolling and ambushing us with short bursts of speed. We can take advantage of that by taking away his gravity and binding him.” 

Uraraka stared at Izuku in anticipation, “And Bakugo?”  

Izuku frowned, realizing something clearly, “He’s been brutal recently, singling me out like he has some kind of vendetta. If I had to guess, Bakugo will come after me. Tight spaces work for his explosions and how he can move around with them. That’ll leave Iida to focus on the task and play defensive with the bomb.”  

Awed, Uraraka whooped in excitement, “Neat deductions there Sherlock,” Izuku snapped out of his trance and smiled embarrassed, “So how do we win?” 
He brought his fist up to his mouth and pondered a moment, Uraraka, waiting for a response, copied his pose, “We don’t play by his rules. It’s going against every urge in my body to say this but, instead, let's do this...” 

 

Match starts.  

 

They inched through the corridors, edging out of the stairwell to make some noise and draw out any ambushes. The villains knew they were coming, they didn’t have the element of surprise, but they could bring the villain to them. On the fourth floor, Izuku inched forward on even steps that Vi instructed him about. Footwork had to be second nature, so might as well kill two birds. Practice footwork and be ready for a surprise ATTACK! 
Bakugo leapt into the air in front of them and unleashed a violent blast of explosions. Izuku danced back slightly out of range, the front of his costume singed. Uraraka lightened herself at a moment's notice and glided back. They landed and poised themselves for his follow up. None came as he calmly surveyed them. He held two hands behind him and was ready to unleash a torrent of force to propel himself. When he did, Izuku tried sending out a tendril to his leg in hopes of tripping him up, but he adjusted quickly and launched up and over them. Uraraka glided forward towards where Bakugo once stood and Izuku covered her. 
As soon as Bakugo landed, he threw a punch forward, his leading right as Izuku predicted. Izuku grabbed and judo flipped him over his shoulder. Landed flat on his back, Bakugo had the air driven from his lungs. Then Izuku stepped forward, knelt to one knee and dropped an elbow to his chest. Bakugo gagged and flopped back when he tried to get up. Izuku stepped back to let Bakugo stand. When he was halfway up, Izuku launched forward a jab through his head to the other side. Bakugo’s face was in the way. He stepped back and clenched his face, while Izuku gripped his fist. He had punched Bakugo’s forehead and hurt himself. And he had forgotten to shroud his fist in black whip. The gauntlets helped stun him but he lacked the proper follow through, especially when Bakugo peered through his fingers and glared with hatred at Izuku. 
“Since when can you throw a punch? Did all the first-hand experiences finally sink in? I guess being on the receiving end unfucked your brain a little.” 

“I must prepare, use every asset at my disposal. Because I’m fighting you, Bakugo. And you’re amazing.”  

“You damn nerd, SHUT UP DEKU!” Bakugo launched up and landed on the wall. From there he propelled himself like a torpedo at Izuku, forcing him onto the backfoot.  

“It was a compliment you asshole!” Izuku blinked away at the shock of his response and continued to step back while maintaining his stance. But fear sapped his memory. A few days of drilling weren’t enough to bulldoze years of combat experience.  

Bakugo was so focused on Izuku that he completely forgot about Uraraka. Thus began phase two. They lured with bait, now to spring the trap. Uraraka, making herself weightless, braced her feet on the wall and with the aid of the thrusters, she launched forward like an asteroid and headbutted Bakugo in the spine. He gagged and dropped into a kneeling position.  

“Go Deku, finish the plan.” Uraraka tethered herself to gravity again and mimicked Izuku’s stance. He nodded and, with great reluctance, sprinted away from Bakugo, who finally regained his footing and reared about to see the woman who blindsided him.  

“Running away Deku? I always knew you were a coward, but this is fucking gutless.”  

“Ignore him Deku, you can do it!”  

Izuku pushed on, determined and frustrated, knowing he had to leave her in a difficult position and look back every few seconds to see blasts of explosions around where they were. He knew that for all of Bakugo’s bluster, he wouldn’t totally abandon the mission, the bomb was nearby on this floor. He rounded the corner and found the door leading to the bomb. Inside, Iida was attempting to get into a villainous character. With exaggerated flourish, he announced his plans for evil and the hero's doom. If he hadn’t heard a man shout he was going to be pirate king so much, this might have elicited a laugh. It did a little, considering it was Iida who never emoted beyond strict protocol. But he had already started to snake his tendril along the floor, extending it like an arm, just how Luffy described it. Though he phrased it more like walking with his fingers to a plate of meat just out of reach. Iida contacted Bakugo in his villainous persona, demanding an update.  

“Bakugo, my nefarious ally, have the hero’s been dispatched with haste?” 
“The fuck are you talking about!? Shitty Deku is in the room with you right now. The sneaky bastard ran away and left the extra behind.” Agitation flushed through Izuku as he heard this.  
“How cruel! Are we sure he’s not the villain? To abandon his ally so thoughtlessly!” Again Izuku flared in frustration, the tendril he slowly snuck out writhed more lively than before, becoming jagged and erratic. 

“Play this out loud, I want the shithead to hear this... Yo, Round cheeks, your boyfriend is listening. Prepare to die!” 
Uraraka spluttered a moment, “Whaaat...He’s not my- wait, did you say prepare to die?” 

“Erm, yeah, so what?”  

“That’s such a stupid line. That’s like saying I want you to be dead now. Who the fuck says that?”  

“Uraraka, that is highly inappropriate language!”  

“I don’t see you reprimanding Bakugo here!”  

“I’ve honestly given up on him, no amount of positive reinforcement is going to change him.”  

“Deku completely fucking failed, you have no chance glasses. AND STOP IGNORING ME BITCH! Imma nail your ass to the ground if you don’t stop floating. You hear me DEKU!”  

“Why don’t you come up here and make me?”  

“Done.” An extremely loud explosion sounded down the hall, and a shriek of pain followed.  

“BAKUGO” Izuku had heard enough of his taunting.  

“There’s the slimy bastard, trap his cowardly ass glasses.” 
“My name is Tenya Ii-” he never finished as a burst of tendrils ripped out from Izuku’s arms and latched onto Iida. He was flung into the wall, elevated off the ground, and rendered useless. He grunted in pain as his breastplate was shoved against his chest. Izuku, he saw, was wreathed in tendrils springing up all over him. One tendril punched through the reinforced wall next to Iida.  

“What the f-” Bakugo was cut off as he was pulled from his position standing over Uraraka, through the wall and smacked into one of the pillars. The tendril coiled round and round Bakugo until he was restrained. Izuku cried out in pain as his gauntlets were ripped open and his limbs felt the burning of overuse. He curled up and crouched down, retracting the tendrils into him. Released, Bakugo and Iida slid down to the ground, both winded and shocked by the display.  

“All students please stand down; an unprecedented event has occurred. This match is-”  

“Not yet!” shouted Uraraka, as she ran through the hole in the wall Bakugo came through, ran to Izuku and helped him to stand. “It’s just there Deku, just a few more steps.” She went over the Iida adn used the capture tape to bind him. Then she stepped over to the stunned Bakugo, readied the capture tape and just as she wrapped it around his wrists, Izuku laid a hand on the bomb.  

“Hero team... WIIIINS!”  

---

Baratie, East Blue  

Zoro levelled his blade at Mihawk. He, in turn, adjusted to a side-faced stance. His humiliatingly miniscule knife pointed to the ground in front of him. Unsheathing his second blade, Zoro took a small step forward. Footwork took slight steps until both combatants' blades touched. A test tap resulted in Mihawk twisting the knife slightly and a wave of energy seeming to knock Zoro’s sword away. Zoro brought the second blade up to block an attack. But Mihawk stood still, eyes scanning Zoro. Zoro breathed deeply, quietly, not giving himself a second to contemplate his move lest his tells give him away. The blood rushed in his ears, screaming at him to pounce, pounce, pounce, hit hard and hit fast. But Izuku and Cooper’s voices were louder. Don’t let yourself be baited.   

On instinct, he swung the first blade back up to meet the knife, while his second blade swung from the side to his exposed chest. But Mihawk batted the first blade again and quickly swept the knife in an arc to block the second blade. Zoro returned to defensive stance and inched back by one step. Mihawk didn’t look bored per say. But he wasn’t impressed. If anything, he looked appreciative that he didn’t come out swinging like every other up jumped fool with a sword who thought strength was all that mattered. But he needed to up his game.   

So he held both blades pointed forward at Mihawk and with a burst of speed, he leapt forward and brought both swords together in a scissor strike. Mihawk stepped into the leap and met the diverging swords right at their middle point, halting their slice. Zoro tried to push against it, but Mihawk pushed harder. Zoro flew back and slid along the wet dock. He was still on his feet, but his arms buzzed with the force transference.   

With added distance, he took the time to take stock. Two swords wouldn’t cut it. Three swords it is. He clasped two swords in one hand, unsheathed the wado-ichi-monji and bit into the handle. He crossed his arms, held a sword to each side and the blade in his mouth hummed with untapped energy.  
Mihawk took a moment to consider Zoro’s actions and finally got into a classic fencer’s stance, knife held straight out and both legs coiled to leap. 

Then they jumped forward. Zoro spiraled through the air like a corkscrew, the blades were his wings, and he glided towards Mihawk. Mihawk rolled the blade along his fingers and with each pass of Zoros swords, he sent to knife forward in a series of jabs. Each jab struck at the flat of each blade, turning them a fraction, which in turn sent Zoro careening overhead and to the side. He landed at the edge of the dock, splayed on the ground but each sword held firm.   

Now his muscles were numb with pain. Each strike from the knife sent ripples of force throughout his blade. But now he was in the exact spot for Luffy’s cockamamie plan to take place. He supposed he would have to thank Usopp for sourcing one from one from the local fishermen, but they would undoubtedly question why they’d want a live one.  

Mouth numb but firm, he dipped the blade into the awaiting trough where the electric eel they bought was nesting. Disrupted, it unleashed a burst of electricity that was conducted by the blade. Spinning into a kick flip, Zoro was back on his feet and launched back at Mihawk. Zoro unleashed a flurry of slashes with his other two blades, each one blocked by Mihawks knife. Htne Zoro swung the blade in his mouth at Mihawk. He caught the blade on the side of the knife and with lighting reflexes released the statically charged knife from his grip, stepping back and launching his pointer finger into Zoro’s chest to push him back.  

“ A good swordsman uses every resource available to them. This is a fight to the death as you proposed, so I would be insulted if you didn’t do everything in your power to survive this bout. ”  Mihawk eyed the knife now sticking in the ground and giving off a small bolt of electricity. He had been disarmed and would nearly have had his arm become useless if shocked. His knife wasn’t as well insulated as Zoro’s swords or his Yoru. “ With my being disarmed, I therefore have no choice but to use Yoru. En garde.”  

Zoro was back on his feet, every muscle ached, his two handheld swords looked close to shattering and his breastbone felt like it had suffered a fracture. His breathing was becoming more labored. One last bout. Caution to the wind, he got what he wanted, Mihawk using everything he had. He briefly sheathed his swords and pulled out his bandana, wrapped it around his head. The wado was back in his hand as he prepared to pull out his blades once again, “I’m ready.”  

“ You won’t retreat? Your body betrays you. You have no strength left. There will be no shame in standing down. ” Zoro eyed the massive blade. He looked to the side where Luffy looked on fretfully now that his electric eel plan was a bust. He smiled at him, reassuring, ‘I disarmed Mihawk thanks to you’ he wanted to tell Luffy and Usopp. Then he saw Nami. She finally came out. He was sure she would make haste for a boat and escape their clearly suicidal gambit. But she stayed.  

“If I retreat… my dream will be lost forever.”  

“ Well said. ”   

Wado in mouth, swords in both hands, Zoro charged once more at Mihawk. 
Yoru held in an upward slash motion, Mihawk met him. 

They clashed.  

Two swords shattered in a burst of metal shards and Zoro slid across his knees and stayed there, defeated. The last of his strength left his arms but not his legs. He stood and turned. He heard the steps of Mihawk as he returned to Zoro. He cocked his head to the side, asking him why.  

“Wounds on the back are a swordsmans greatest shame.”   

“… magnificent. ”   

And Mihawk brought the blade down in a slash, cutting into Zoro’s chest and finally the three swords master fell back, his strength gone.  

Mihawk stepped back as Luffy launched himself at Mihawk, fist reared back and ready to knock him down. Mihawk merely sheathed Yoru and used the pommel to catch Luffy in the gut. Luffy felt it. The strange sensation of blunt damage actually hurting him. He collapsed back into a kneel next to Zoro’s prone form. He held one arm over his stomach and the other arm over Zoro.  

“ Monkey D Luffy. What will you do after this defeat? ”   

“I will become… King of the Pirates.”  

“ Maybe you will at that. Until then, keep your sword close Roronoa Zoro and find me one day, when you are strong. The King of the Pirates needs a strong sword as his right-hand man .” With that, Mihawk left, content in his survey, ready to report to the Fist. Faintly he heard a woman saying “Nine” though it sounded like it was coming from the den den mushii in the one crew mates hands.  

  “ Curious… ”  

---

UA Ground Beta  

Izuku and Uraraka stared horrified at the footage of Zoro laid out on the dock. Blood was pouring from his wound like a babbling brook. But it seemed that Zoro had enough strength, for one last declaration to his captain. With sword held aloft, he made his proclamation.   

  “I’m sorry I disappointed you Luffy. You need the greatest swordsman by your side and I let you down.”  

  “No, no you didn’t Zoro, you truly went beyond your limit. And you were clever. And careful.” Izuku hoped his words reached them but he knew he shouldn’t interrupt a man on the brink. Uraraka nodded solemnly, fists clenched in determined fury. She saw his drive and hoped to match it, somehow, someway.  

---

  Shady Sands  

“From this moment forward, to be the greatest swordsman, I will never lose again!”  

Lucy, Titus and Cooper stared silently at the projection. This bloodied man laid low and tattered but still determined. While Lucy was hopeful, while Cooper was almost proud, Titus internally seethed at his own cowardice. ‘ What does it mean to call myself Knight and steal Titus’ name, when someone like him can lay it all on the line and keep going like there’s a tomorrow worth living for?’ He wished he had told the truth. He wished he could be strong for them. He wished he could be the hero he always wanted  

---

Hell  

“Is that OK, King of the pirates?”  

Charlie smirked at that, sensing no loss of life in Zoro yet. But it was tenuous, he teetered on death unless he got immediate help. Then she saw three new arrivals on the scene. One Sanji, the other Gin and the last Zeff. Zeff got a good look at Zoro’s wounds and ordered Sanji to gather supplies. He indicated for the Straw Hats to get Zoro onto their ship. Gin and Usopp carted the now unconscious swordsman under his arms up the gang plank. Luffy lingered back, standing in place and holding the chat device pointed at the ensemble. Nami was shocked and rushing ahead to get things set up.   

“Luffy, it’s not your fault okay? Please respond, let me know you can hear me. It wasn’t your fault.” Charlie called out to him. The camera wavered a bit and then she heard mumbling, “He’s going to be alright. He’s in safe hands. I won’t lie, his grip on life looks shaky, but he will pull through. He’ll need you there for when he wakes up right.”  

“M…Me…”  

“That’s right. You’re the captain right. By the way, even though Zoro said it, it still counts. Ten.”  

“Um…yeah, okay, be there and… hey why do you keep saying numbers, I’m confused?” He sounded so unsure. It wasn’t like before, when his answers were a blasé confidence that bordered on lackadaisical. Now he was so quiet. She knew he needed to laugh.  

“It’s a count, every time you said ‘King of the Pirates’ I’d tally the number of times you say it. Since meeting you, I’ve heard that phrase ten times.” She giggled to let him know it was OK.  

“Technically Mihawk said it as well, so shouldn’t it be eleven?”  

“I like to tally how many times I hear it in the Straw Hats.” He seemed to think that was the end of the conversation and walked forward, the chat automatically shutting down and signing them out. “I think he was suffering a panic attack. He’s probably never seen someone close to him nearly die.”  

Vaggie said nothing and looked at the assembly. Angel seemed a little shaken at this outcome and Husk had little to say about the events, so kept quiet. They weren’t sure whether to get the guests involved in the crew, but she knew for certain Nifty must never know!  

 

Notes:

Happy birthday to me, as my present I got out the first half of this story. Next chapter will be dedicated solely to Arcane's bridge battle and everyone's response. Please gentlemen, rest your sphincters. I shall have delivered shortly.

Chapter 16: Battle of Self Discovery Part 2

Summary:

The final battle to determine our characters path in life is about to take place… try not to be too disappointed.

Notes:

Guten abend aus Deutschland.
Yes, if you read that text correctly, I’m on holiday but I’m still delivering you the goods, so long as my jet lag gives me some extra working hours of insomnia.

Part 2

 

Vi and Cait finally made it. It was only two weeks since they escaped Stillwater, found Jinx, recovered from her wounds and hiked to Piltover but it felt like months. Ekko, easing up after his blowup about the hex device and Jinx’s past, was now studying the device curiously. He poured over the detailing and then had a look into the back of the device. A core of power derived from hex crystal shards. Each device had an internal power source he estimated to last until the heat death of the universe. Now they were on the bridge into the city proper, but it looked like it had seen some struggle. Stains of gas attacks and scorch marks from firebombs dirtied the pristine golden sheen. They were close now and Vi could see the blue pulse of energy that was the Hex Gate. It was mesmerizing and terrifying. The same burst of blue energy that had vaporized her entire family now shot across the sky with no harm to anyone else. She stilled at the sight and felt Ekko bump into her from behind. He was too caught up in his own head. Vi was staring ahead at the dissipating blue gleam, picking up the faint sound of ringing.

She felt a hand rest on the side of her arm, shaking her from her tunnel vision. Cait nudged her along, smiling encouragingly, and took the lead. Now she could see the flutter of a swarm of Firelights all around them.
“They’re beautiful, I’ve never seen them before.” Cait spun around to see their green glow bouncing off the metal surface.
“They kind of look like Midoriya’s powers. Never seen them leave the undercity. Ekko?”

“It’s not unusual. They go where light is needed. It’s why we named ourselves after them.”

Vi kept a keen eye on everything. Even with Cait taking the lead, it wouldn’t be impossible for the Enforcers to fire on one of their own. The HexTab buzzed in her pocket as more and more messages came through. Last she saw, apparently Zoro was challenging some big shot to a duel and Midoriya was doing a combat drill. But she was more focused on what Powder said to her. She was coming down there. ‘Down where? Did she mean the firelight base? But Ekko said she could never find it. Did she mean coming up here?’

A part of her wanted to turn back, Caitlyn was back in the city, safe as possible and Ekko would be the best ambassador for the Undercity. Powder was back there. But then again, Powdr had access to a HexTab and was in active contact with her. She could talk to her remotely and maybe, over time, bring her back to sanity. Heck, she could set her up with Charlie and get a full-on session going.

Suddenly, they were blinded by floodlights. She brought up her arms to shield her face. Then she heard the telltale clicks of guns being cocked.

“What is the meaning of this?” Cait demanded, stepping in front of Ekko and Vi. From behind the silhouettes of the enforcer squad strode their Sheriff, Marcus. “Please, stand down, we have found proof of Silco’s plans.”
“Show me” demanded Marcus, holding his hand out expectantly. Ekko adjusted the capsule carrying the gemstone to bare. That’s when marcus pulled out his pistol and shot Ekko in the heart. He flew backwards, the satchel tube falling from his hands. Vi ran forward to Ekko, checking his pulse. Sure enough he was still alive and breathing, just stunned.

“Sir, what do you think you’re doing? This is a diplomat for the Undercity; his concerns deserve to be heard. Get a medic, someone!” she fell silent when he held a gun to her head next.

“I told you to stay out of this. Orders from up high, no entry in or out of the Undercity.”

“Then let me speak to my mother or councilman Talis, he will verify my mission.”

“It’s his orders I’m following.”

Cait was flustered, unable to plan a way out of their situation. Vi was about to run up, maybe draw his fire, but ultimately try to disarm him. She really wanted to get that gun out of cupcakes face.

 

Then the firelights converged, and explosions rang throughout the bridge. Not far off, Heimerdinger landed in the Undercity port and saw the colorful display of fireworks erupt in green sparks. His eyes widened at it.

Soon the clouds dispersed, and the dust settled, Vi was covering Ekko’s prone form, her jacket scalded from the blast wave.

Marcus laid against the guard rails; his arm missing and face half burning. He gasped some thin breath and attempted some final words, “Tell my...tell my daughter I...” then breathed his last.

Jinx stared down at the slumped sheriff in a mixture of confused sympathy and cold indifference, “Don’t worry, I won’t tell your daughter that you... you worked for Silco and took part in a drug trade and arrested my sister, completely destroying my childhood and-you know what, fuck you, I’m telling her everything.”

“What the Hell... all those firelights were... Powder how long did it take you to make those things?”

Powder shrugged and gestured helplessly, “I don’t know, I have a lot of time and, you know, mayb they’d come in handy.”

“Tiny little firework bugs, hundreds of them?”

“Well, let me answer your question with another question, how is she still alive?” Jinx gestured to the collapsed form of Cait. After all those explosions, all she had was an injured knee. “I mean, that thing was in her face, point blank explosion. I think she was closer than that Sheriff guy who got his arm blown off.”
“I don’t know,” Cait shouted at her, “maybe I dodged it!”

Jinx nodded, accepting her answer, “Dodged it, got it, hm... dodge this then.” She reared her gatling gun to full bore and unleashed a payload of scattered bullets. The two dodged away from each other as bullets cut a line between them. From seemingly out of nowhere, Ekko blasted straight at Jinx. With his pipe ready, he swept the capsule satchel from her person and whipped it back to Vi’s feet. They clashed with green blasts from his hoverboard and red flashes from her pistol. Vi grabbed Cait and helped her up, supporting her back onto two feet. They stared at the battle between the two but Vi couldn’t stand back and watch. She layed Cait against the gaurd rail and ran in to support Ekko.

“Get out of here! Run!”

Vi paused midstep, blinked and held out a hand to grab both Powder and Little Man by the scruff of their necks, “I’m sorry but... why?”
Ekko struggled against her grip and also held the gun in Jinx’s hand away from his face, “She’s dangerous, we need to get this to the council as fast as possible.” Jinx was trying to reach for the satchel with her other hand.

“Yeah, I get that but why do I need to run away and leave you here to do that?” she was starting to get a little annoyed with him.

“Only I can hold her off and Silco will be her any minute. I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to step up.” he looked at her apologetically but was confused to see her dumbfounded.

“Dude, just hop on your hoverboard and fly away with the satchel. She’s not going to kill me, that’s why she warned me.”

“Yeah, Saviour boy, I said I was coming down here.” she pointed up at one of the pillars of the bridge.

“Oooh, coming down here from up there. Sorry, that sounded really weird how you phrased it.” Vi shrugged and then threw the two of them to other sides of the bridge.

“Ekko, can we please cool it with the revolutionary spirit and savior complex.”

But Ekko slid back up to his feet, weapon ready to strike, “I wonder where I learned that from.” he said sarcastically.

“From Vander I guess because I never did the whole martyr complex with dreams of becoming a revolutionary. Seriously, I was probably the most selfish person to look up to.”

“No arguments here.” Jinx mumbled.

“You shut up, you just killed like five people.”

“Six but who’s counting?”

“YOU ARE!”

A click and bark of a rifle sounded off behind them. Cait marched up, rifle in hand and aimed at Jinx. She glared at her in focus, waiting for her to make a move. Jinx smiled back innocently, raising her hands in seeming surrender, but unveiled a grenade in each. Her smile turned feral, and Ekko twirled the staff in his hands. They all stared at one another, watching the other to make a move. Then…

WAP WAP WAP.

“OW, bloody Hell Vi!”

“That freaking hurts man!”

“Augh, got me in the ear!”

“ALL OF YOU SHIT UP AND SIT DOWN!” Vi commanded them. All three of them cowed, they cradled their heads and at on the ground. They still glared at one another, until Vi stomped a boot in the middle of them. “I don’t care what bad blood we’ve got going on, but it stops now. We got a job to do and Silco is our biggest concern.”

Cait and Ekko looked away I shame, Jinx sneered contemptuously, “Then whatever bad blood you have with Silco, leave him out of it. OR did you forget, I’m the one who blew up that warehouse.”

She had the decency to look down ashamed of that but Vi didn’t have it in her heart to throw Vanders death in her face.

“Well what about those enforcers, they were just doing their jobs and you blew them up!” Cait snapped at Jinx, though neither Jinx or Ekko looked to concerned about that.

Vi sighed and rubbed her head, “Cupcake, I know you came down to the Lanes to look for the hex crystal, not to avenge those guys. This is literally the first time you’ve brought them up since Stillwater.”

Cait mellowed and sat back, a look of horror crossing her face as she realized that fact. Vi needed to clear this up quickly, “Powder, no I’m not calling you Jinx, you can leave here and do what you want. These guys will look for you and there’s not a lot up here I can do to help. I want you to stay with me, but the choice is yours if you want to go back to Silco.”

Jinx looked at ease that she wanted her to stay and at the same time wanted her to be free. Cait wanted to argue but Vi shook the satchel in hers and Ekkos face. They looked at one another and nodded. Coming to an unspoken agreement, they all rose slowly and backed away from each other. Jinx looked at Vi, who smiled hopefully and then took out the hexpad to shake it gently at her. Jinx smiled lightly and took out her own newly acquired hexpad and shook it also. “Maybe I can take it apart and make a copy.”

Cait smirked challengingly, “Bet you Jayce will get to it first.”

“You’re on Piltie. Ekko…” he stared at her and she faltered, held her head high and stepped back towards the fog, “Thanks for the pep talk MOM.”

“Yeah,” Cait smiled playfully, “not bad negotiating.”

“What were you saying about not becoming a revolutionary…seriously, where did you learn that?”

“From me. I knew I’d get to her.” Chimed in Lucy.

“You shut up, you’ve been absent all day, where were you?” Vi demanded.

“…observing, the many choices my multiverse counterparts have made…”

“We fell into a hole and now we’re in quarantine.” Titus piped up.

“And whose fault is it that I got dragged into this. I coulda stayed out there and busted you guys out, now we have to rely on Jeeves and quite frankly, his voice is giving me the weirdest sense of Déjà vu.”

“Can we focus on the fact that I’ve managed to convert Vi from a wastelander like felon into a den mother.”

Vi was balancing between laughing at Lucy’s predicament and growling at her absurd idea.Until Jinx decided to butt in, “Thanks for the help other me.”

“Excuse you, but I think the person who had the best impact on her was me.” Cait tried to interject but Vi just dragged her and a snickering Ekko along. As a last ditch Hail Mary, Vi shouted loud enough into the chat for Jinx to hear, “By the way, where are we with setting up a therapy session for my sister!”  Jinx groaning in the distance brought a cheerful smile to her face.

---

 

UA Medical facility.

Last thing Izuku remembered was looking at the chat with Uraraka and listening to Zoro’s proclaimation. Then it seemed all the strength he had left after his exercise deprecated its final bar and he collapsed into a painful unconsciousness. Now he was roused by a shake to his shoulder.

Izuku shuffled up the bed to sit and face All Might. In a puff of smoke, he became Toshinori, costume hanging limp and his entire person drooping over in exhaustion.
“Well, that was an eventful first day. Can’t say I ever tried using rope powers to subdue my enemies but I can’t argue with results.”

“All Might... oof, I feel so lightheaded. How is Uraraka, and Bakugo and Iida?”

“Calm down kid,” he placated gently, “you just got out of an extensive healing plan with Recovery Girl, so your energy is shot. As for your classmates, they all emerged with minor scrapes. Bakugo managed to tough it out and decided to sleep it off back home. Speaking of the test, you should be happy to know you won, well, your team won. And young Uraraka was voted MVP. She showed real bravery and kept going to the end, even gave you an opening to tag the bomb while she restrained the villains.”

Izuku released a breath of relief, “That’s good, thought my quirk was doing harm. I was feeling pretty banged up using it. Glad Uraraka got the praise she deserved.”

“Don’t sell yourself short, she emphatic you get your share of the glory, told us your whole plan and contingencies. You know, a hallmark of a good hero is putting ego aside to get the job done. You realized what should be prioritized and where to delegate. And yes, I anticipate you shrugging this praise off as well.”

Izuku slumped in concession and smiled at Toshinori, “The job was done, that’s all there is to it.”

“Well, not entirely.” Izuku perked up, “For one thing, you might want to tone down the homages to me in your costume, people might get suspicious.” he whispered conspiratorially.
“I didn’t think you were so conceited All Might,” Izuku snorted, smiling wider, to Toshinori’s confusion, “Uraraka assumed I was some sort of bunny hero. I guess adding the extra pieces to my costume pulls focus.”

All Might laughed, “Yeah, maybe I’m just paranoid. It’s just... a thought occurred. You went into the test planning for Bakugo to come after you. Then you provoked him enough to lose focus, like you knew how his anger worked. Midoriya... what is young Bakugo to you?”

Izuku paused for a moment. On one hand, he followed Bakugo his whole life, dedicated himself to basing his hero life off a few people; All Might, Lady Nagant, Star and Stripe and Bakugo. Bakugo’s entire life was the same, to be the best, an admirable quality. They were just starting, and he was no doubt going to excel in an academic setting.

On the other hand, he was tired of being a steppingstone. Funny how it took meeting someone so unapologetically positive like Charlie and Luffy being confronted with absolute douchebags and seeming insurmountable obstacles to realize the limits of his complacency. He didn’t hate Bakugo, far from it, he was just exhausted with him. His loud boasting, putting the bomb in bomphiologia and being so unapologetically condescending it bordered on pitiable. The fact that any achievement will be met with immediate scorn had Izuku contemplating staying in bed.

“Honestly, Toshinori sir, I think I’m just done with him. Like, having a rival or working with heroes you don’t necessarily get along with is part of the job. But man, I already have enough on plate, I could do without trying to get better than one guy. I need to get as good as everyone else right now.”

“Speaking candidly, I believe you’re well on your way kiddo.” He rested a hand on Izuku’s shoulder and nodded knowingly.

---

Chat (finally right)

 

Lucy: Holy moly you guys are crazy. I mean, you guys are just surrounded by fighting and combat all the time.

 

Uraraka: You say that like combat doesn’t build character.

 

Lucy: I’m saying that because didn’t you originally want to become a hero to rescue people, also hi…

 

Vi: Yo, fresh meat for the chat.

 

Charlie: Wilkomen to the chat.Oh sorry, I need to be respectful to newcomers, ahem, hellooo…ahem, heeelllooo…hello! Why isn’t this working, I’m trying to say hello, ugh!

 

K: Just butting in here, the chat is supposed to ease the means of communication, that means translation. If you see your statement spelled out or translated in you native tongue instead of the spoken language you speaking in, it means the chat automatically translated it both ways.

 

Charlie: Got it… wait isn’t that less effective, we’re not picking up on the subtle nuances of the others dialects or taking the time to learn their language, that just feels insensitive.

 

K: Charlie, you’re language literally summoned a poltergeist when I tried to say my name, I’m not risking the chat becoming possessed for political correctness.

 

Cooper: Ain’t got no time to learn foreign languages.

 

Lucy: you are ageless and walk around the dessert all day, what else are you doing with your time.

 

Cooper: You want some of the jerky I made?

 

Lucy: Nevermind, message received.

 

Cooper: ‘Sides, no point in speakin’ other languages?

 

Vaggie: Why, you racist or something?

 

Titus: He did come from before the bombs fell, I read some pretty nasty stuff about that time, socially speaking.

 

Cooper: Nah ya idjut, I’m in a bad mood and I don’t like people.

 

Uraraka: That just sounds like racism with extra steps.

 

Nami: Well La di da, someone’s going to get laid in college.

 

Uraraka: Knock it off.

 

Charlie: Yeah come on Nami, she’s only sixteen.

 

Uraraka: Eh, to be fair, the age of consent is fourteen in Japan.

 

Cait: Good lord, fourteen.

Uraraka: Before you freak out, it used to be thirteen.

 

Cait: That’s even worse!

 

Lucy: Eh, so long as its between consenting individuals in the same age range with full knowledge of the ramifications, we have no room to judge.

 

Angel: Hey hey, got a new one for the sex positive club.

 

Lucy: Sex positive?

 

Nami: As in, are you positive you want sex?

 

Lucy: Oh then, yes, Titus, provided we get through the detoxification and receive private lodgings, would you care for the sex?

 

Uraraka: Woah, so direct!

 

Lucy: We didn’t have time for prudishness in the vaults, repopulation was a priority.

 

Cait: I feel like I should be arrested just for listening to you talk about this in the presence of a minor.

 

Angel: Lighten up ya prude.

 

Nami: Can we not talk about this right now.

 

Charlie: What would you like to talk about Nami?

 

Nami: I’d like to go back to Lucy’s point about fighting.

 

Uraraka: How is Zoro?

 

Nami: …the idiots hanging in there, and no, I don’t feel bad about calling him an idiot. I stood there and watched him fight a losing battle, and it ended with him nearly cut in half.

 

Vaggie: Ouch.

 

Nami: And don’t get me started about this idiot captain. What were you saying to him earlier Charlie, about not feeling guilty? Well maybe he should have a look at the friend slowly becoming a corpse in my bed.

 

Jinx: Yeesh, don’t come to her if you want a pick me up. I just managed to evade SIlco and his goons, I don’t think they’ll be too happy with not getting the hex gem back… Vi.

 

Vi: I’m not apologizing.

 

Nami: You are the last one to talk about feeling bad or being cheered up. I told us all about you, so I gotta ask, why are you in this chat?

 

Vi: What the fuck?

 

Charlie: Woah, hey!

 

Lucy: Not cool!

 

Uraraka: That’s so unfair!

 

Cooper: Fine, I’ll play devils advocate, why are we takin’ so many loose cogs into this machine. Sooner or later, one of us is gonna bust out with more than a few screws loose.

 

K: Because we need to talk. Roll credits.

 

Cooper: Say wha?

 

K: Nothing. But this is an opportunity. Think about it, we have a means to get out in the open, with no language barriers, what we really want to say. And why so many cooks in this kitchen? Because we’re not making broth, we’re writing a cookbook.

 

Charlie: You might be getting a little to lost in the metaphor there.

 

Vaggie: Really Charlie, you are saying that?

 

K: I didn’t want to choose just well adjusted people and throw one person who was struggling in the mix so they could get cured. For one thing it doesn’t work like that.

 

Charlie: I could have told that.

 

Vi: Could you?

 

K: But its about equality. No one faction or person is wholly good or undamaged. Some of you may be more nuts than others but that doesn’t mean the rest have nothing to say. So just know that if you have something to say that nobody has a monopoly on suffering or the right to be sanctimonious t others.

 

Charlie: Let he without sin cast the first stone.

 

Uraraka: Guess that will be me then.

 

K: What did I just say!?

 

Uraraka: Just lightening the mood.

 

Nami: Why did you choose to come out and say something now, when I spoke?

 

K: Who knows.

 

Luffy: Nami, can I come in to see Zoro?

 

Nami: Ugh, yes Luffy, you can. You’re the captain, you don’t need your crews permission.

 

Luffy: I do when my crew is upset.

 

Uraraka: nevermind what I said, let him cast the first stone.

 

Vaggie: Seriously, for a pirate, I haven’t seen you do anything as devilish as, as um…

 

Alastor: Blackbeard?

 

Vaggie: Yeah, who?

 

Alastor: Someone who’s contract I lucked into. Nasty piece of business, sold his soul to survive a hundred wounds. He had enough fizz in the tank to keep swimming without a head when his ship went down.

 

Luffy: He sounds pretty badass. SO he sold his soul to be a great pirate. Did I do that too?

 

Alastor: Beg pardon?

 

Uraraka: Yeah beg pardon?

 

Luffy: Ate the devil fruit and got gum gum powers. That’s going to help me become, no wait, is Charlie still listening?

 

Charlie: Dang it, almost got one more.

 

Luffy: Sanji stayed behind to cook some food for us, if you want something to eat. I’m not hungry.

 

Nami:… you’re not hungry?

 

Luffy: I only ate two halibut’s but he has some more from what Usopp caught. I kinda want to go back and try the eels though.

 

Lucy: Ugh, eels?

 

Cait: Disgusting, wriggly things.

 

Titus: I’ll stick to the protein blocks.

 

Cooper: I heard they were mostly made of crushed bugs.

 

Titus: Bugs?

 

Cooper: Or faeces. Gotta get that protein from somewhere?

 

Titus: Oh god!

 

Uraraka: Oh man, I could go for some eel sashimi.

 

Vi: Grilled on a stick and smothered in honey glaze.

 

Luffy: Aw man, now I really want some, I’ll show this to Sanji, might give him some ideas. You coming Nami?

 

Nami: Gimme a minute. Need to finish reading this to Zoro, but send Usopp this way.

 

Charlie: Reading?

 

Nami: Zeff told us to read and talk to Zoro, keep him aware of us, helps with his recovery.

 

Ekko: That’s great, managed to find a doctor. Your boy looked pretty messed up.

 

Nami: Zeff is the head chef.

 

Ekko: The chef. The chef fixed the guy cut open by a sword. How? By filleting him?

 

Alastor: If you have any spare meat in freezer, send it my way would you?

 

Uraraka: How did this chat devolve into cannibalism AGAIN!?

 

Ekko: Engaging this chat was a mistake, never again.

 

Charlie: Cognitive stimulation programming, genius. Maybe I should start reading to everyone before they go to bed.

 

Alastor: Oh Charlie, the hotel stay is already infantilising enough, do really feel that-

 

Angel: Can you read “Little House in the Big Woods”, Ma read to me and Mol when she had the chance.

 

Vaggie: …I’ll see if I can find a copy.

 

Uraraka: I’ll check the internet, there’s probably a PDF I can download.

 

Luffy: Hey guys, what do you think of the food?

 

Image uploaded: numerous serving plates with eel served in a variety of ways; deep fried, sushi, baked, skewered and in a broth.

 

Lucy: Now that’s some good eating. I haven’t seen anything like that since my vault. But if this place is anything like my home, then we’ve got oysters.

 

Uraraka: Can I become a pirate and eat like that, I need it in me now!

 

Vaggie: …Angel?

 

Angel: mmm, nah.

 

Nami: Wait, I have the chat snail, how did you take that picture?

 

Luffy: We got two now. You can keep that one, so we can talk to each other more.

 

Izuku: That means you can keep that one Uraraka, I got an extra one myself.

 

Uraraka: eeeeee, I finally got a phone like everyone else! I always wanted one of these.

 

Izuku: I thought you wanted eel?

 

Uraraka: Later.

 

Izuku: if Sanji can send me on his recipe, I can probably whip up some eel sashimi.

 

Sanji: Best way to show a lady you care is a meal as beautiful as her. I think I can help you out.

 

Izuku: uuuummmmmm

Chapter 17: Recipes (and blueprints) for disaster

Summary:

The chat tries going the therapy route with an experimental test subject, meanwhile Sanji is going to become the chats celebrity chef and Iida taps into a past life as a mad scientist.

Notes:

Wooo, that was a long wait, hopefully this update and the next will sate your appetites. Soon I’ll be back to work but I just have morning shifts, so I can use the evenings to tinker away at this story bit by bit.

Also, I’m unsure if something I write for Jinx might be triggering but best to ere on the side of caution. This chapter attempts to discuss some of her more pronounced feelings. While I don’t reference her schizophrenia directly, I do allude to it. Also, apologies if I come off as insensitive in its depiction, my intention is fo this entire fic to acknowledge and work on the characters mental health difficulties, not to make light of them. Going forward, portions of chapters will be dedicated to this topic.

Chapter 17

 

Charlie: Hey K, can we set up a private messaging room or private chat room, something like that?

 

K: That sounds feasible. Gimme a sec, aaaand done. Alrighty, all of you can now set up a private chat room. Try not to abuse this privilege as I won’t be monitoring what happens in them only what happens after.

 

Charlie: Your respect for privacy is honestly a breath of fresh air. Ok, starting one now, see you all in a moment.

 

Charlie has created a private chat.

 

Vi: Oh God, she’s not going to pull one us into a therapy session is she?

 

Cait: Some of us might need it… nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

 

Izuku: You know, therapy under duress isn’t a productive means of treatment.

 

Titus: What about being ambushed by a therapy session?

 

Lucy: Those are interventions and are perfectly valid.

 

Jinxter: Whoever needs to be ambushed for an intervention and gets caught in one is a total bitch.

 

Jinxted has been added to the chat.

 

Jinxter: GODDAMMIT!

 

Charlie in private chat

Jinxter in private chat

---

 

Vi: That’s progress, I guess. How’s things in your worlds? God that’s weird to say.

 

Izuku: After the last two days of classes, I’m already hoping for a bit of calm.

 

Uraraka: It’s been all go since before we started. Now we have a new mission.

 

Vaggie: They already sending you guys into the field?

 

Izuku: Nothing major like that, just voting class representative.

 

Cait: Oh, I remember those days. Jayce would try and use that for our tutor sessions, though there were only two of us.

 

Vi: Yet you still insisted on being number one.

 

Cait: …

 

Cooper: heh, teachers pet.

 

Cait: I liked to focus on my schooling. It opened up doors for me that I could choose. Not just getting good grades for the “Nobel class” but proving I could be good at stuff.

 

Cooper: I get it, heck way back when, little Jeney had a better head for numbers than I ever did, I was so proud of her… um, forget I said anything.

 

Titus: Wait, you had a daughter?

 

Cooper: I have a daughter, out there, somewhere. I’m just tagging along with you yahoos to find her.

 

Izuku: Wow, that’s so sweet. I always see you as this unapproachable mystery that would sooner hurt me than give me a straight answer.

 

Uraraka: Yeah, like some badass stranger who shoots first, ask questions never.

 

Izuku: It’s incredible to think we’ve come this far by talking to you since we first met you after kidnapping Lucy.

 

Titus: Jury’s still out on my end.

 

Cooper: See, now, I resent that remark. Not yours tin man, I’m watching your p’s and q’s even when you sleep.

 

Titus: I’m going to ask for separate rooms.

 

Cooper: First rule to getting information.

 

Sanji: Hurt them enough until they squeal but make sure they can keep talking.

 

Cooper: This has been life lessons with Cooper Howard.

 

Angel: Mr cook is pretty violent in the chat. Have we got to him already?

 

Sanji: Part of being at Baratie, can’t be a sea chef if you can’t defend your kitchen.

 

Luffy: Aw man, does that mean you’ll be stopping me from taking midnight snacks.

 

Sanji: Haven’t said if I’m going with you yet. But a good chef keeps their stocks plentiful and uses every bit.

 

Usopp: Yeah man, that story was intense. Surviving ninety days, stranded and starving.

 

Luffy: And good ol’ Zeff, what a man, ate his own leg to save you.

 

Izuku: He what!?

 

Uraraka: He what!?

 

Angel: He what!?

 

Titus: He what!?

 

Alastor: My ears are ringing.

 

Cooper: Shit son, you felt the ache.

 

Sanji: Remember it every time someone comes through our doors.

 

Cooper: Respect. No fair that any child should have to go through starvation. But you see it all the time round here.

 

Sanji: Nah, can’t be having that. Alright, I’m still waiting on chore boys friend to make a comeback, got time for a cooking lesson?

 

Lucy: YES! Sorry, just, all that food you showed us, I almost cried. Even the vaults didn’t have gourmet like what you made.

 

Vi: I spent years with gruel, ginkgo nuts and grog. Most amount of nutrition I got was moss from the wall sprouting fungus or when the occasional rat passed through.

 

Cait: Rat!

 

Vi: How do you think I got enough protein to look this good, cupcake.

 

Izuku: Let’s set up a stream. Hang on a tick.

 

Stream started, inviting all to view.

 

Sanji: Well now. What have we got here? My my, I knew you sounded beautiful but ladies, the recording doesn’t do you justice.

 

Uraraka: Oh, um, hehehe.

 

Angel: Aw, you blush like a literal schoolgirl. Ha.

 

Cait: ahem, is now the time for chatting us up, I thought you were showing us some cooking.

 

Sanji: No rush, don’t want this thing to end too quickly, I’d miss you if all suddenly disappeared.

 

Vi: Alright smoothy, no need to lay it on too thick.

 

Izuku: Hold on, I need to take notes.

 

Uraraka: For cooking right?

 

Lucy: For COOKING, Right!?

 

Izuku: yeeeeessss…

 

Sanji: Hey, by all means, if you want a lesson, I’d be happy to oblige. Nothing I love more than someone sharing the same passions as myself. Except of course, for when a woman chases their passions. Now that’s dazzling.

 

Lucy: Oooh, well, aheh, please, don’t mind us.

 

Uraraka: Yeah, please, go ahead, Work your magic.

 

Cait: We’re paying close attention.

 

Angel: I know I am.

 

Cooper: Wipe that smile off your face cook.

 

Husker: Eyes on your work, no distractions.

 

Vi: Cooking, do it, now, nothing else.

 

Izuku: So many notes, I need more paper.

 

Sanji: A’right, a’right, no need to get worked up fellas, and Vi, darling, of course.

 

Vi: I’m not getting worked up! Just, want to learn some survival skills. Who knows when I have to go back to the Lanes.

 

Cait: Not too soon hopefully.

 

Vi: RIGHT! Not…not too soon… stop smiling Sanji!

 

Sanji: This is what you can do with some basic shell fish. Given all of you are pretty scattered about, I’d say it’s pretty likely that each of you have at least access to shellfish. So here’s one you can make with oysters and a fish of choice.

 

Izuku: Neato, I gotta try that. Man, I wonder if mom would like this?

 

Angel: Really dude, you need to focus up more than cook boy here.

 

Izuku: What? Though I should probably test cook it first. Hey, Uraraka, if I try and make this, would you mind tasting it first, I’d like an unbiased opinion?

 

Uraraka: Uhuhuhu, okay, I, I, I would really like that.

 

Sanji: Not bad Midoriya, course, taking care of your mother is always important. Nothing they love more than a meal made by their child.

 

Vi: Yeah, Vander got used  to sleeping in on his birthday cause me and Powder always made him a bone broth for breakfast. He didn’t look like he ever put on an act, he just really liked the taste.

 

Ekko: I remember the first time you made it though, he got sick for the rest of the day.

 

Vi: Only because we got a pot off you that you salvaged from the trash without cleaning.

 

Lucy: I never got to cook for my mom. My dad though, man, he loved the jello cake. I was never let near the kitchen until I was fifteen. Norm was always better at it than me, he knew the exact measurements down to the milligram.

 

Alastor: Ah yes, mother had the finest recipe for jambalaya, with spicy kick straight outta Hell. I quite certain a diet of just that is what konked her out in the end. Ahh, I still remember that recipe to this day. I never did add enough paprika.

 

Uraraka: Oh God, you didn’t use… human meat did you?

 

Sanji: Beg pardon?

 

Alastor: No, no, I could never sully the taste of that dish. No substitutions, otherwise, it doesn’t get that right taste.

 

Uraraka: Oh phew, I thought for certain you at humans on the regular. It is so weird that I’ve acclimated so fast to this conversation.

 

Sanji: I’m sorry, human. You eat humans?

 

Alastor: Ate humans. Honestly, I’m quite partial to venison myself. But that taste, each one different depending on the person.

 

Vaggie: Alastor, stop being gross.

 

Usopp: I’m sorry, gross is what you’re using. Because honestly, I’m more in the realm of terrified beyond capacity to think.

 

Nami: Oh, so that’s why you keep making mistakes every time.

 

Usopp: No I… hey…

 

Izuku: Unfortunately, until we make contact, we kind of just roll with the motion. It’s weird that I’ve acclimated to this information but I suppose the cognitive dissonance of knowing he’s in Hell as punishment is the equivalent of knowing a serial killer is in Tartarus, at this point, their actions are beyond anything I can do.

 

Vaggie: That’s a pretty defeatist attitude I’ve never seen from you. Is something up?

 

Izuku: It’s nothing to worry about, just what with the election today and everyone talking about what they can do and seeing so many horrible things on this chat, sometimes I feel-

---

Charlie has logged in

 

Charlie: GUYS! I think I may have overestimated my capabilities in Jinx’s case.

 

Vi: Her name is Powder.

 

Charlie: WE ARE NOT DEADNAMING HER RIGHT NOW! Ahem, do any of you know anyone who can speak to her on her level without coming off as condescending.

 

Izuku: We’re talking about knowing our limits and adapting to change, well this is mine, so no.

 

Uraraka: Don’t ask me.

 

Angel: Well-

 

Charlie: VETOED.

 

Pentious: What about-

 

Charlie: ALSO VETOED.

 

Cooper: Don’t look at us, can’t trust any one of us to be on the level.

 

Lucy: He’s right, we’re going through things right now.

 

Uraraka: Iida, you like saying rules and telling people what to do, can you help us out here?

 

User: I beg you pardon Uraraka but just because I adhere to the rules, does not my entire personality make.

 

User name changed to Iida

 

Izuku: Apologies Iida, we are kinda in a crisis mode and need some outside support.

 

Iida: Well then, I will adhere to my principles as a hero and provide help where I can. What seems to be the issue?

 

Charlie: One of my patients has started spiraling after I tried addressing some of their less talked about emotional problems. Lesson learned, I’m not saying anything else but we do need some one to talk her down from her ramblings.

 

Jinx: I see you all… talking about me like I’m not here-I AM HERE. I AM RIGHT HERE. I CAN’T BELIEVE I LET YOU WALK OFF WTHOUT ME. I let you get away from me one time and you just disappear like fart in the wind. No more, I’m taking you back, I just need A LITTLE more time. JUST STOP TALKING LIKE I’M NOT HERE! I AM NOT A PROBLEM!

 

Vi: Woah Jinx, let’s talk okay. I’m not disappearing on you again. Remember we promised!

 

Ekko: We learned out lesson, no more leaving without saying a word, alright. We’re here to talk, we could always talk to each other at least.

 

Jinx: Mylo and Claggor don’t want the Piltie listening in Little Man. Sheeee could spilling our beans.

 

Ekko: She’s going to go away, all right Jinx, the piltie’s going away.

 

Jinx: Stop talking to me like I’m a kid. I’m just trying to help. Only wanted to help, only wanted to help, only wanted to help.

 

Vi: So what’s the plan Jinx?

 

Jinx: …whew, building stuff. I’m going to try building stuff. But Silco is gone. Vi is gone. Little Man is gone. I don’t know who to build with. What can I build?

 

Vi: Don’t suppose anyone knows any mad scientists?

 

Uraraka: Iida, you were glasses, you’re a mad scientist right?

 

Iida: How does that remotely make sense? Why would being a scientist help her? Why a mad scientist?

 

Charlie: We touched on certain things about communities and who we associate with, she pointed out her interest in science and-

 

Jinx: I’m not an experiment. Stop talking bout me like I’m an experiment.

 

Vi: You’re not the experiment but think of this like an experiment… like our gadgets, lets all try something new and see what the results are! Is that right? You know I’m not a scientist; I have no idea if what I’m saying is making sense.

 

Jinx: Gimme a goddamn minute!

 

Jinx has logged off

---

 

Vi: Shit, fuck, that was an absolute, ugh!

 

Nami: Farce?

 

Uraraka: Shitshow?

 

Vi: I like shitshow better.

 

Charlie: I really dropped the ball here. I thought just listening to her was enough but then sh started spiralling and when I tried pulling her back, I think I triggered her.

 

Vi: IT’S-it’s fine, Charlie, honestly I’m just rushing his whole thing. I thought, hey, free therapy from someone I trust and now I’m expecting miracles.

 

Charlie: You trust me!?

 

Ekko: That alone is enough of a miracle, I don’t know if she’s ever trusted someone so quickly.

 

Vaggie: She is awesome at divine intervention, maybe she is a miracle.

 

Charlie: Aww, Vaggie, you’re the miracle.

 

Vi: Dear God, I’m becoming diabetic just listening to you two.

 

Cait: Too tough for a soft side?

 

Vi: Get off my back cupcake.

 

Izuku: I guess… we have to wait for her to come back and ask for help.

 

Uraraka: So much for trying to be heroes, couldn’t even talk to someone in their own head.

 

Iida: Maybe we should talk to mister Aizawa, get his input.

 

Izuku: You’re right. I thought I could be a hero from the get go but, heh, shows what I know.

 

Iida: Well obviously had we prepared, and if we were given ample warning…

 

Cooper: Episodes don’t work like that. It’s violent, unpleasant for everyone but a lot of the time, if you don’t know it is, it can spring up on ya like trap.

 

Izuku: Then I guess first step in our education, knowing what we don’t know.

 

Cooper: Now you’re getting’ it.

 

User: Getting what? Why do I feel like you’ve walked up to me with a rabid animal? I was just about to go on break.

 

Izuku: Mr Aizawa, sir, we need some help with dealing with panic attacks.

 

Uraraka: And trauma.

 

Iida: And spiraling individuals.

 

User name changed to Aizawa

 

Izuku: Sensei, I’m sorry. We didn’t know what to do and we almost let someone who needed our help down.

 

Aizawa: Midoriya, you recognised your limits as a current hero and sought out your immediate senior. I want to say my talk with everyone about an unfair world meant I got through to you.

 

Izuku: But…

 

Aizawa: But maybe I’m throwing you too much into the deep end. Saving people from disaster situations doesn’t stop at physically pulling them out of the rubble.

 

Izuku: Saving them mentally as well. 

 

Iida: I believe it’s called grief counselling.

 

Aizawa: In truth, we wouldn’t be teaching this to you until year two. But maybe the basics can help you wrap your mind around trauma response.

 

Izuku: Please sir, not just for me, but for all of us. You said you wanted to push us to plus ultra and that life is unfair. Life wasn’t fair to us when we came across something we weren’t prepared for.

 

Uraraka: You’re right Deku, we’ll need this in the field. I always thought it came down to just being there and smiling.

 

Iida: Uraraka, I believe you have hit the nail on the head.

 

Uraraka: Huh

 

Izuku: Think about it Uraraka, All Might, just by being on the scene, inspires hope in many tragedy victims. He always has that smile to let everyone know that everything’s gonna be okay. Right sir?

 

Aizawa: I should be peeved that you overlooked myself as a hero to save people in disasters but yes, I suppose.

 

Jinx has logged back in

 

Jinx: Eh, honestly, I don’t think anyone would look at your four face for hope. You got the whole murder hobo look.

 

Aizawa: Because you just went through a panic attack, I’ll let that side.

 

Lucy: But to be fair, you don’t really have a face that inspires care and comfort, you pretty much confirmed you thrive off the fear children in your class have of you.

 

Aizawa: Heh, I guess I can’t dispute that, you sound like you’re recovering well.

 

Jinx: Oh that’s other me, I’m primary me.

 

Lucy: Excuse you, I’m the primary me, I was in this chat first.

 

Iida: Surely it would be more efficient to say your names correct.

 

Lucy: Sorry, yes, I don’t know why I get dragged into these types of conversations. I’ve been feeling on edge down here.

 

Charlie: We might have to touch on that later.

 

Titus: Don’t worry, I’ll talk to her, maybe get her to try some of these oysters, they’re great.

 

Iida: That does raise a question Aizawa sir, your appearance and persona is tailored for underground work. How do you adjust for public hero work when required?

 

Aizawa: Ugh, I should be asleep by now, class is over… fact is, I’m tailor made for underground work. The HPSC designated me an underground hero and exclude me from disaster relief except in extreme circumstances.

 

Iida: The government stops you!?

 

Aizawa: Upsets their public image if civilians are saved from a frowning man with a bad attitude.

 

Izuku: Huh, we really do need tutorials about counselling if Bakugos going to go public.

 

Vi: Woah, how’s that backbone coming along?

 

Uraraka: Deku! Okay but sir, surely you must have wanted to be a hero who rescues people?

 

Aizawa: Let’s just say, I’ve had experience at a young age of how badly rescue can go and it colours your outlook and attitude.

 

Charlie: Well Jinx, you’re back, how are you feeling?

 

Jinx: Chill, I suppose. I don’t know, I’m not exactly good with new people.

 

Charlie: Jinx it’s my fault for being so inattentive and for not having the right level of experience for something like this.

 

Aizawa: Maybe you should talk to Hound Dog, our counsellor, about what comes with being a therapist. I can put you in touch, maybe even give you a recommendation.

 

Charlie: You’d do that?

 

Izuku: Can’t help but feel we may have judged you too soon.

 

Aizawa: You are so lucky I can’t read what you’ve said about me. Iida, report.

 

Iida: As of right now, I have nothing to report of significance.

 

Aizawa: Nothing?

 

Iida: As far as I know.

 

Aizawa: Good, I would have thought less of you if you ratted out your classmates.

 

Uraraka: Another rational deception!

 

Izuku: I take it back, your certifiable.

 

Aizawa: Try not to get too big for your britches Midoriya.

 

Izuku: Since we have you here, do you think you can put us in contact with a mad scientist.

 

Aizawa: Mad Scientist?

 

Charlie: BAXTER, HOW COULD I FORGET HIM!

 

Izuku: Someone for Jinx to connect with. So she doesn’t feel left out.

 

Jinx: Well aren’t you courteous. But yeah, get me some fruitcake before these slices of white bread drive me nutty…er, with their good two shoes act.

 

Aizawa: …Iida, any pointers?

 

Iida: Why am I always the example?

 

Aizawa: I need to make a phone call, hold on. Hey, Higari.

 

Power Loader: Yes.

 

Aizawa: We need a mad scientist.

 

Power Loader: Noooo!

---

 

Lucy: We just need someone for her to talk to until she feels comfortable to spend time with us.

 

Jinx: So start talking before I start inserting paint bombs in places they really shouldn’t be.

 

Aizawa: Keep her talking until I find a solution.

 

Iida: Oh good lord. Um…ok, erm, I am mad scientist, it’s so cool, sonuvabitch!

 

Uraraka: …what…

 

Iida: Err, YES, I am the mad scientist who shall spread chaos and invade the very core of your world. May all organisations tremble before the might of my scientific prowess and-

 

Jinx: Bwahahahaha!

 

Baxter: Please stop, I’m imploding like a dense star into a black hole from the sheer level of embarrassment alone you-

 

Angel: Nah man, keep going, this is gold.

 

Titus: I don’t think even Elders of my order speak with this much conviction and we literally make a religion out of technology.

 

Iida: Of course, the sway of the mad scientist does not bend to the will of the powers that be, mwahahaha

 

Izuku: Iida, I think you can stop.

 

Nami: Yeah no, I don’t think he can stop.

 

User: Hey meatsacks, how are my babies holding up? Who ordered the super awesome turbo boots?

 

Luffy: Meat! Meatsacks! Genius, we prepack some meat and we don’t have to rest for recharge. Sanji, I’m placing an order for meat sacks.

 

Sanji: I honestly don’t know how to parse your diet sometimes.

 

Izuku: Um who are you and why are you grabbing my arm!?

 

Uraraka: Hey, hey, aren’t you making him uncomfortable?

 

User: oooh, is someone making someone uncomfortable?

 

Vaggie: Dangit, which one of you assholes told Nifty about the chat? Pentious!

 

User name changed to Nifty

 

Pentious: What! Miss Charlie says we need to be inclusive, and Nifty was feeling left out.

 

Charlie: Aww, such a nice sentiment Pentious… but such bad timing.

 

Jinx: I’m not listening to any more quack doctors thinking they can mess with my head, it’s already a mess, I don’t need you making more.

 

Nifty: Ooh, a mess, I can clean that up. Heheh.

 

Jinx : What the heck, why are you telling people I’m a screw up? What about confidentiality?

 

Charlie: About that, I-

 

User: Say, this is a nifty baby, howsit work, is it spy tech, I don’t remember seeing this on the support department build list.

 

Izuku: Can you please let me go?

 

Uraraka: Can you please let him go?

 

Lucy: Jeepers, this whole thing is turning into a real kitchen sink. Excuse me there miss; it seems to me that Izuku doesn’t appreciate your invasion of his privacy.

 

User: But I gotta see this thingamabob that’s talking back to me. Is that the famous doohickey that Mr Powwer Loader mentioned? The one that talks to people from other dimensions? The one that uses wavelength frequencies to transcend the particle field of our universe? The power to do that in phone would-

 

Jinx: Punch a hole in space-time the width of a pencil!

 

Cait: Wait, wait, stop!

 

Izuku: Yeah, hold on, did Power loader talk about the chat in public. I thought Principal Nezu issued a gag order?

 

User: I may or may not have been eavesdropping while I was working on baby number two-seventy-seven, the discrete sound recorder. Have to test it in real life conditions. And what’s more real life than finding out my teachers knowledge of all things science.

 

Iida: How deplorable, that’s a massive breach of privacy! How id you end up in a school for Heroics?

 

Baxter: And where can I find a mind like that in Hell, such ingenuity is unprecedented among the young. Not since little Hedy have I seen such a brilliant-

 

User: The names MEI HATSUME, class 1-H support department and CEO of Hatsume industry. Glad I can finally meet my Guinea Pigs for my babies in person!

 

User Name changed to Hatsume

 

Aizawa: Hey Midoriya, I found you a mad scientist.

 

Izuku: Is this for the comment I made about All Might inspiring hope and not you, because I’m sorry!

Notes:

I will die on the hill that Sanji in the live action is actually really charming and if I swung that way, I would definitely be swooned. Whether what i wrote for him is charming and not pervy is entirely different matter.

Soon we shall have our first subgroup in the chat; Mad Scientist brigade. Soon we’ll have grouchy bastards, money grubbers, the idealists and the tired mentors.

Chapter 18: My name is (insert name) and I'm...

Summary:

Group therapy can go a long way. Who wants to be the first to spill the beans?

Notes:

I really dropped the ball when it came to consistent posting. I'm sorry I let you guys down. This extra long chapter should be a soothing balm.

This chapter just didn't come easily. So many parts I wanted to write about here will instead occur in the next chapter, that's when so much comes collapsing down around our characters.

 

Chapter 18  

 Vault 4

Lucy was feeling pissed. It was a new feeling, being pissed, especially when she was finally somewhere familiar. A vault, of all places, was pissing her right off. Of course Titus made himself right at home, relaxing for, what she assumed, was the first time in his life. He snuggled into that bathrobe, chowed down on half his gift basket before the overseer finished his introduction and was now up and alert for… meal prep. He meticulously watched over the recording Sanji made and followed each step with military precision. It was sweet and would have been endearing, if it weren’t for the fact she was chomping at the bit to get the hell out of there.  

Cooper was no help. Jeeves and he schmoozed with the mutated residents of Vault 4, for once not having to put up the façade that he didn’t care what other people thought. He roamed the halls, accepted and amicable. But she was seething. It didn’t make any sense. How could a vault be so heavily mutated when its purpose was to protect them. She couldn’t put her finger on it but this place was wrong. The secrets were wrong. Opening the door to outsiders was wrong. The number of limbs were wrong. The grotesque nature was-  

‘Holy shit I am racist!’  

That pretty much took the wind out of her sails and she slunked along the corridors to the classroom. She didn’t want to interrupt Titus’ cooking just so she could investigate and ask the others opinions. But at the same time, she didn’t feel confidant sneaking around until she ran what she discovered by the chat.  

‘Can’t help but feel I would get called out if I didn’t talk to them first.’  

“Lucy?” She turned around to see Titus, sans bathrobe and back in his freshly washed paladin suit, smiling that big dopey grin. Admittedly, it was heartening to see the grizzled soldier let down his guard, especially after the fire fight, the tooth bullet infection and putting up with Cooper’s crap.  

“Hey Titus. I was just coming by to help out the class. They’re so eager, like a classroom of Midoriya’s and Uraraka’s.” Titus chuckled lightly but was distracted by the paraphernalia around the class. A flag of the NCR hung intact and unburnt. Old currency with the face of Tandi and Kimbell. Remnant armour pieces from the army and MP. And a blackboard listing the important dates of the NCR, from the bombing of the old world, the establishment of the government, the battles of Hover Dam, the destruction of- wait hold up.  

“What the hell? Why did they, Lucy you can see this too right?” Lucy peered around him to look at the blackboard. Dates and events listed on a timeline. 
“Yeah, I can see it, something catch your eye?” 

“Fall of Shady Sand, 2277. I lived in Shady Sands, grew up in Shady Sands. I saw it get destroyed. But that didn’t happen until 2284. I was only eleven years old then but I remember the heat.”  

“I didn’t know, I’m sorry if this has upset you. But you know, knowledge is about spreading information. Maybe if we tell them what we know, we can correct it.”  

“Yeah, I guess. I mean, the purpose of the Bortherhood, beyond saving civilians, is the spread of knowledge about old world tech. At least that’s what they told me.”  

“Does it not do that anymore?”  

He scratched his neck and leaned against the teachers desk. It slid a little and he nearly stumbled.  

“Not… really. It’s kind of twisty. When the order first emerged, it was definitely all about sharing information and rebuilding society. But then the Enclave happened-“  

“Enclave?”  

“Longer story. But they pretty much decimated the central group. Then they were scattered by in-fighting, civil wars and factionalism. Remember what I said about everyone wanting to save the world?”  

“Nobody is quite sure how to do it.” He nodded in understanding.  

“Yeah. Right now, we are slowly closing ranks, uniting the east and west coast under the new supreme Elder, Maxim. His stance is pretty, conservative, to say the least.”  

 

Lucy drank this all in. No wonder he was so at ease. His entire civilization was in a constant state of flux. First the NCR, then the Brotherhood. No wonder he felt like he could finally put his feet up. He deserved a bit of stability. 
“You could come back to my Vault.” She blurted out, only realising what she said after saying it, “I mean, after all this, finding the head, getting those bounties, finding Moldaver and my Dad. We can all go back together. Just go back to Vault 32 and not have to worry about the wasteland.” 

“Sounds too good to be true.” He smiled at her, genuinely considering the option.   

“Excuse me, Miss McClane, the Overseer would like to see you now.” 
“Yes, absolutely, lead the way. Max, lets meet back in the room and, have a think about what I said, alright?” she waved him off and followed close behind, thinking of how to get some answers about this place. Why were people so heavily mutated in a sealed environment? Why were they operating a secret compartment to capture unwitting civilians? And what was up with the state of education in this place. 

---

 

Izuku: So, I’m the class representative, how are you guys doing? Because I’m freaking out.  

 

Ekko: Have you tried insisting that your position is purely combat oriented and not designated diplomat? Believe me, I’ve tried, and you can read back to see how well I do in that capacity.  

 

Cait: Have you tried aiding and abetting the systemic corruption for pointless posturing and asserting your position for personal betterment? We’ll meet with Jayce tomorrow and I can give you a first-hand account.  

 

Husk: Have you tried coasting by on charisma and good will? Because... you know what, never mind.   

Charlie: Hey, that was hurtful. Izuku, c’mon, you’ve been given ample opportunity to showcase your potential. Really let your classmates see you!  

 

Izuku: I’d much rather they didn’t see me.   

 

Iida: Poor Midoriya was shaking like a leaf when he stood at the podium with Yaoyarozu. Could it be you are shy?  

 

Uraraka: Guys, have you considered how unused to this situation he is, considering what he was like before we met him and how he gets when Bakugo decides to go off at, well, anything.  

 

Vaggie: Wuff, he didn’t give you any crap when you won did he.  

 

Uraraka: Just the usual amount.  

 

Vi: Bout right, top dog doesn’t like not being the cock of the walk.  

 

Izuku: What, no, that’s not... eww, Vi. That’s not what he was upset by. In middle school, he always avoided these school official titles, figured it didn’t matter, and his priority was getting the role where it counted.  

 

Sanji: Got it, now you're strutting all over the place and looks at you like you just trod in manure.  

 

Usopp: Here’s your strategy going forward, duck and cover when he comes and avoid eye contact.  

 

Izuku: Finally, some good damn strategy.  

 

Luffy: Hell no, that’s not what you do, you gotta go up there and proclaim it loud for all of them to hear, you are going to be class rep. Scream it loud!  

 

Izuku: Luffy please, not so loud, the rest of the Cantine will hear you!  

 

Luffy: Hey... shut up... do it.  

 

Vi: I’ve literally never seen him so serious.  

 

Usopp: He locked in.  

 

Luffy: I’ve never been more certain about anything ever before.  

 

Charlie: What about being pirate king?  

 

Luffy: I’m super serious about that. I’m serious about all the super important serious things all the time.  

 

Husk: Man, I don’t know what you want to hear from us, take it or don’t, can’t make up your mind for you.  

 

Vaggie: Doesn’t stop you from pushing the clients on booze.  

 

Husk: Hey, if it sets you at ease. Maybe Mr. Hero needs a bit of liquid courage.  

 

Izuku: Again, we are under age!  

 

Iida: That is exactly why I voted for you Midoriya, you know exactly when to put your foot down for the rules.  

 

Izuku: You voted for me?  

 

Uraraka: I voted for you because you’re pretty smart and don’t want to be leader.  

 

Izuku: Well what sort of chance does that give me? Alright then, I am a leader, I hereby renounce my title.  

 

Pentious: Ooh, it’s like one of those zen riddles, the guy who wants power the least deserves the power.  

 

Uraraka: Exactly.  

 

Izuku: But that doesn’t help me with the whole not being ready or not wanting power thing here.  

 

Mei: Heck, I’d vote for you, you don’t complain or drink too much.  

 

Uraraka: MEI!  

 

Iida: You’re not in our class, you can’t vote for Midoriya.  

 

Izuku: And Power Loader drinks?  

 

Mei: He does now, I’ve been tinkering out the wazoo with my science buddies.  

 

Charlie: Oh yes, I’ve been meaning to ask Baxter for my phone back. There are some photos I don’t want him seeing.  

 

Vaggie: I thought you deleted last Thursday's album? You mean you didn’t  

 

Uraraka: And you stole my phone; can I please have it back?  

 

Mei: After I finish updgrading, so much to do. Not to mention these photos of robots and power armor. My mind is brimming with ideas for new babies. What about a quirk based power armor? Oh wait, a rescue drone based off Mister handy? NO! Super Stimpacs!  

 

Izuku: Mei, slow down, I think my phone is smoking trying to keep up with you.  

 

Lucy: Hey now, don’t pump the breaks on her gas, I wanna hear this.  

 

Baxter: A mad scientists' ramblings must never be interrupted, within the throws of inspiration comes that ten percent of genius intu-  

 

Jinx: We’ve already started tinkering with this shit. I’m talking about weapons, generators, and personal protective devices.  

 

Usopp: Yo, Luffy, I just designed the best thing ever for you, a certified Usopp trademark invention guaranteed to save your life.  

 

Jinx/Baxter/Mei: Ex-fucking-scuse me!  

 

Usopp: I mean a special invention we made as a group project, yay.  

 

Charlie: Group collabs, incredible, Baxter you have shown a marked improvement in socialising.  

 

Baxter: That’s because literally everyone else in this hotel is certifiable or obnoxious enough to cut me off mid-  

 

Emberlynn: OMG, there is so much shipping material here, why can’t get in on this?  

 

Angel: Oh, right, now I remember why you were sent to Hell.  

 

Charlie: Angel, nobody deserves to go to Hell. While your file is big, it’s b ecause I needed to cross reference with another file courtesy of... I...M...P, yeah, IMP who accordingly documented some aspects that need to be addressed.  

 

Angel: Such as, come on, give us some dirty deets.  

 

Emberlynn: Noooo, please don’t...  

 

Charlie: C’mon Ember, it’s not as bad, you might indulge in some fantasies, be very vocal about your opinions... ship people in real life together... oh no...  

 

Emberlynn: Septiplier so could have happened!  

 

Izuku: We don’t do that here. Or anywhere, I guess, have to remind myself this is multiversal.  

 

Cait: Yeah no, even in this universe we don’t pine for others to get together. Vi?  

 

Vi: I’m poor, why should I care about Piltover couples.  

 

Luffy: Is this like that time I heard people talk about Shanks and Mihawk. Heard some guys say those two belong together or something. Guess they heard stories.  

 

Vaggie: Let’s put this in perspective, you’ve met Shanks and you’ve met Mihawk, would either of them work well together?  

 

Luffy: Mihawk is kind of a downer. Cool as hell, but he doesn’t get excited. But Shanks, he threw parties at Makino’s when Uta’s first tooth fell out. Naaah.  

 

Emberlynn: Opposites attract, the ultimate combo of enemies to lovers, no, frenemies to lovers, one is an introvert and the other is an extrovert, it’s the perfect mix.  

 

Charlie: I know this is going to sound rich coming from me, but please don’t use psychological terms or act like a couple therapist for people you don’t know.  

 

Emberlynn: Aww but I ship you and Vaggie.  

 

Charlie: Eeeee, Vaggie we have a shipper.  

 

Vaggie: Charlie.  

 

Charlie: Right, yes, my B. But you know what, this seems like the perfect opportunity for aaaaaa group therapy session!  

 

Baxter: Good lord!  

 

Uraraka: Hey, you finally got to finish a sentence.  

---

Group Therapy Sub-group  

 

Charlie: Welcome everyone to our very first gathering. Let’s begin by having someone standing up and saying their name and what they would like to get off their chest.  

 

Husk: My name is Husker, and I feel like I should be back at the bar doing my job.  

 

Charlie: You’re excused. Anyone else?  

 

Angel: Welllll...  

 

Vaggie: You stay. You seriously need this.  

 

Charlie: Please Angel, this can be a great opportunity for all of us to air our grievances.  

 

Nifty: What about Alastor, how come he doesn’t get to play?  

 

Baxter: Aren’t you supposed to be cleaning this place?  

 

Iida: How dare you sir, to speak to a woman ion such a way?  

 

Izuku: Iida, Iida, she’s the hotel maid, it’s literally her job.  

 

Iida: Ah.  

 

Charlie: I wanted to invite Alastor, but he seems to have disappeared for the day.  

 

Vaggie: Yes, so sad, let's get this over with before he comes back.  

 

Izuku: We should set some ground rules, no one is required to speak and no one should be coerced to speak.   

 

Uraraka: Angel.  

 

Angel: What, why are you targeting- nah, I’d totally do that you're right.  

 

Izuku: We should also use this as an outlet for frustrations and not serious topics like personal issues.  

 

Charlie: Good call, good call, I’m still running our private sessions. So, who’s first?  

 

Lucy has logged in  

 

User: I mean, it’s nothing personal, we just don’t trust you anymore than we can throw you. Which we would not do, as that goes against a whole litany of health and safety protocols, not to mention would be of grievous effect to both you and the person or persons throwing you.  

 

Lucy: Yeah, nothing personal.  

 

Vi: What the what, aw man, now I have to listen to my sister in stereo!  

 

Luffy: LUCY! I thought you were dead!  

 

Lucy: Luffy, don’t worry, I only signed off for a day. Vi, boom, pow, explosions! Wanna get in on this Jinx?  

 

Jinx: Boom pow, boom boom pow pow.  

 

Lucy: Boom boom pow?  

 

Mei: Boom pow pow pow, boom BOOM!  

 

Jinx: Ha, good one.  

 

Lucy: Classic Mei.  

 

Vi: She joined literally yesterday and you’ve been gone for hours!  

 

Cait: She’s just trying to get under your skin.  

 

Vi: And it’s WORKING!  

 

Izuku: Circling back, who and what was that earlier?  

 

Lucy: UGH, this damn overseer is being a total butt about this whole vault secrecy thing. I get it, I’m new, but surely they would tell us immediately what their deal is to stop us going deep diving where we’re not wanted.  

 

Charlie: Is Cooper or Titus near you, I’m getting vibes you’re going to go off the handle and do something reckless when they aren’t around?  

 

Lucy: I have Jeeves.  

 

Jeeves: Always a pleasure Mam. Shall we decicate flesh now or later?  

 

Lucy: Not now Jeeves...  

 

Jeeves: Understood, setting mechanism to surprise attack mode in one hour.  

 

Baxter: Wait, if we know when it will happen then how is it a surprise-  

 

Angel: We don’t know what second in an hour it will happen.  

 

Iida: Honestly Midoriya, the fact you deal with this madness on a daily basis further cements my choice in electing you. Only you would be qualified enough for our class.  

 

Jinx: Ooh, use Jeeves as a threat, he doesn’t know if it can self-destruct or not.  

 

Baxter: Preposterous, surely, she wouldn’t detonate a bomb in such close proximity to her body, that threat is baseless.  

 

Lucy: Yeah, that wouldn’t work in the long term.  

 

Vi: You’re actually listening to them!  

 

Lucy: Hey, it’s not like I detonate bombs close to me or put myself in mortal danger, danger just happens to me, maybe I should be near the overseer when that happens.  

 

Izuku: Uraraka, why are you staring at me?  

 

Luffy: Go plundering, if you find out their secrets then you can unravel whatever evil plot they have and maybe overthrow him!  

 

Husk: Only a crackhead pirate captain like you would come with a plan like that.  

 

Izuku: Lucy, what if you use that health and safety idea against him.  

 

Charlie: Ah, a bit of reverse psychology, I see what your putting down.  

 

Lucy: Wait, are you streaming, I can’t see what he’s putting down?  

 

Vi: She means get into their heads. No offence, but these guys are morons. Just tell them you’ll investigate anyway.  

 

Lucy: But what if they...  

 

Cait: If they argue against it, just reverse your position to the opposite extreme. Believe me, this worked for me everytime I wanted a shift change.  

 

Izuku: Use your speech skill to get the best outcome, spam him enough times if you have to.  

 

Lucy: Are you sure you’re not just brute forcing this like Vi does?  

 

Vi: Oh absolutely do that.  

 

Izuku: Yes, definitely.  

 

Lucy: I really must be living in an apocalypse if you and Vi are agreeing on something.  

---

Vault 4

Lucy switched off the communicator and marched right back into the overseer’s office. He looked up from his desk, mug in hand, and was about to speak when, “I’m going to level 12 to find out what’s down there."  

He was taking a sip from the mug and spat out the tepid coffee, “Blegh, another moldy one. I really need to clean this office. Goosey, we have finished the matter, level 12 is forbidden.”  

“Then tell me what’s down there.”  

“Uh, no, we don’t talk about level 12.”  

“Fine then, I’m going to level 12.”  

“No, it’s forbidden.”  

“So you better tell me.”  

“No I... but you... oohh, this is a very frustrating conversation.”  

---

  Group Therapy Sub Group  

 

Uraraka: hope that works out for her.  

 

Izuku: It will, she’s surprisingly good at communicating.  

 

Vi: Thinking of learning a few lessons?  

 

Izuku: You can talk! Sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean-  

 

Vi: nonono, that’s good. Bottle it up and it explodes out of you at the worst time.  

 

Cait: Right, just look at Jinx.  

 

Jinx: sssssss, oohhh  

 

Vi: No, we’re not at that point yet.  

 

Cait: Sorry, my sense of humor is about as on par as my people skills.  

 

Vi: Time and place.  

 

Charlie: Anyway, back to the topic at hand. Does anyone have something they would like to get off their chest. Keep in mind, this is a circle of trust and it cannot be breached.  

 

Jinx: Yeah, who wants to be the first one to fess up and spill their guts for everyone to use.  

 

Izuku: To be fair, this is a multiverse chat, even if you told me something so deplorable and despicable, well, I can’t exactly do anything with it, not when I don’t even inhabit the same universe.  

 

Ekko: Nah, it’s more than that, we’re each part of some group. We know others who could use our secrets against us. What’s to stop us from taking the first person who confesses secret and not confess anything ourselves.  

 

Luffy: That doesn’t seem fair.  

 

Vi: Fair! Fair is striking back because we didn’t get a fair shake the first time. And once we bring others into this, are we really going to trust them with our secrets. I don’t trust anyone in the council to use these secrets against me and steal this tech.  

 

Luffy: I always thought fair was making that promise and never breaking it, no matter what.  

 

Charlie: We don’t bring in people who we don’t trust. So what does that tell you all?  

 

Izuku: You trust us all.  

 

Vi: But I don’t trust you! I’m sorry, we’ve chatted, we’ve talked and yeah, maybe we’ve helped each other out, but somethings, I just can’t tell anyone, not even for something small, like dreams or feelings.  

 

Luffy: Can I punch you through the chat, because I really want to punch you?  

 

Izuku: LUFFY!  

 

Iida: That is not condusive to a healthy group session.  

 

Charlie: I won’t condone any violence in my sub-group. Luffy, you are warned, apologize!  

 

Luffy: I’m not apologizing for Vi being stupid.  

 

Cait: Vi has very valid concerns. I don’t think she should be forced to confess anything. Trust is a bridge a mile long and an inch wide. It can be so easy to break that bridge and it takes a while to cross it. Patience is a virtue.  

 

Usopp: Luffy’s not exactly built for patience, right now he’s walking around the room with the transponder snail, he’s not leaving Zoro’s side at all and he already broke his fasting by grabbing an entire plate of sashimi.  

 

Luffy: Vi doesn’t want to trust us, I won’t force her, but she shouldn’t say her dreams are too small for us.  

 

Vi: What... no I mean, my dreams aren’t that big of a deal. Like, c’mon guys, they aren’t.  

 

Nami: You can’t believe that.  

 

Vi: It’s all goals now, I don’t have time for dreams, I can only summon enough energy to fester in my hate for Piltover, Silco and this whole shitty system while aiming for the next big problem.  

 

Izuku: Are you even living if you don’t have a goal?  

 

Charlie: Did they take that from you too? Did poison suck all the life out of ya, that you can’t even remember what you want? A simple wish.  

 

Nami: Sometimes, we have to set aside dreams and get through restless nights.   

 

Husk: And sometimes, you gotta acknowledge the shitty hand you have in life.  

 

Uraraka: I don’t even have a proper dream, not when it feels so shallow.  

 

Nami: You wake up every day and be a hero. Are you seriously saying that’s nothing?  

 

Uraraka: Not when everything I want is just money.  

 

Nami: What?  

 

Izuku: Uraraka?  

 

Angel: Dang, talk about simple wish. I spent so much time around velveteen rabbit here I forget some folks can be doing noble shit and want it for selfish shit.  

 

Iida: Surely this is only a surface level value. If we dig deeper, we can-  

 

Uraraka: It’s just money, nothing altruistic like yours Iida or yours Deku. But if that’s not enough-  

 

Charlie: It’s more than that, right? I want to listen, please, don’t think I'm just dismissing you.   

 

Uraraka: I don’t bring it up because people think it’s shallow.  

 

Luffy: But you're a hero. That’s all that matters.  

 

Uraraka: I tell you I’m being a hero just for money, and it goes right over your head, is that it?  

 

Izuku: Pretty much, yeah.   

 

Uraraka: OK, I’m catastrophizing a bit. It’s money for my parents.  

 

Iida: I see, you wish to support them while doing work as a pro-hero. That’s a very noble intention indeed.  

 

Izuku: I guess we just didn’t need an explanation. We can’t have spent this much time togethere and just trust you instinctively.  

 

Uraraka: Thanks guys. But you will promise not to tell the others about this, right? I’ll tell them in my own time.  

 

Izuku: Got it.  

 

Iida: Of course.  

 

Nami: I have something I’d like to say. Luffy. Usopp. You listening?  

 

Usopp: I’m locked in, speak your truth.  

 

Luffy: I'm prepared to listen.  

 

Nami: I-  

 

User: Alert, Alert, intruder detected, all students please evacuate to your designated meeting points. Please follow the directions of your teachers. A breach in the UA security gate has been detected.  

 

Nami: -What the fuck was that?  

 

Iida: Security announcement. It seems someone has breached security on campus. I’m sorry, but we must respond to this. Midoriya, as class representative you must help our classmates follow proper decorum and, what the hell!  

 

Uraraka: Looks liek decorum went out the window because now it’s a mob. Guys, we need to deal, talk to you in a minute.  

 

Vi: Well shit, at least we managed to make it to safe harbor. Let's get this PT meeting over with.  

 

Ekko: These are some nice digs. How’d you get a place on enforcer sarely bigger than the combined living space of the Firelights?  

 

Cait: About that, try not to make too much noise.  

 

User: Caitlyn, darling are you alright?  

 

Vi: Woah, moms packing heat!  

 

User: Caitlyn? Where have you been, it’s been nearly a week since you disappeared? And who are these... associates with you?  

 

Ekko: Notice she stopped herself from saying hoodlums.  

 

Vi: I was guessing it was either ruffians or delinquents.  

 

Cait: No, delinquents have a sense that they’ve been to schooling; you’re more tearaways.  

 

User: Caitlyn, please, focus.  

 

Cait: Apologies mother. Mother: This is Violet and Ekko. They are, um, errr...  

 

Usopp: Dignitaries.  

 

Nami: Delegates.  

 

Ekko: Delegates of the Undercity Council for upward mobility.  

 

Vi: ...yeah that.  

 

Cait: I have brought them here so that we may have a chance to settle the conflict between our cities before all-out war occurs.  

 

User: Perhaps some word of warning can be sent ahead. Though Councilman Tallis seems to be making headway in that regard he’s yet to provide anything of note for communications.  

 

Cait: ...don’t say a bloody word vi...  

 

Vi: ...got it...  

 

User: Well I suppose we should start with having your wounds seen to. Caitlyn, your father will have a look at that shoulder. Mr... Ekko, was it? If you will come with me and we shall discuss... we shall discuss.  

 

Vi: Take care cupcake. Thanks for the lift.  

 

Cait: Just stay out of trouble.  

 

Vi: OK, they’re gone, we can talk now.  

 

Nami: Are you sure, I mean, I can’t help but feel like something is going to happen before I even finish my sen-  

 

Pentious: Miss Charlie, enemies at the gate. They seem to be sieging us.  

 

Crymini: Dude, calm down, it’s just reporters. A whole fuck ton of reporters. But they’re just going to get in our faces and piss us off into giving them a reaction for their compilation video.  

 

Charlie: Change off plans' guys, I’m just going to step out and deal with this. Should be done in no more than two shakes of a lambs- they're ramming the doors. Vaggie, battle stations, defense positions, everyone.  

 

Vi: Well, that’s a bust. Guess it’s just me, the Straw Hats and Lucy.  

 

Lucy: Still dealing with stuff on my end, good luck.  

 

VI: Huh I guess that leaves... me.  

 

Jinx: Ho-ly shit, you have to play shrink! Oh please, someone record this, I need records forever.  

 

Vi: Any chance you wanna postpone till next week?  

 

Nami: I have literally built my nerve up for this moment, it’s now or never and I'm going to need to depend on you guys.  

 

Vi: I’m in way over my head for this.  

 

Luffy: Sorry what, wasn’t really paying attention.  

---

UA, Japan  

The stampede of UA students met the dead end that was a wall of reporters. Each one held either a mic or camera, all pointed out in anticipation of questioning the young hero hopefuls. Each held onto the hope of snagging an interview about All Mights tenure as a teacher, despite him only starting two days ago.  

Those hopes were dashed when those reporters realized the claxon of alarm had frenzied the students into a mob that was now speeding headlong towards them. The bunch up of retreating and advancing reporters stalled all progress of de-escalation. The two forces met in a clash of muffled groans and yelps of pain.  

“This is insane,” chimed Midoriya, squished up against his classmates who followed the crowd, “sooner or later, there’s going to be casualties and people suffocating if we don’t do something.”  

“Then I suggest we plan something quickly.” said Yaoyorozu, not at all Happy to be caught up in this mess. As an aid, she produced some barriers to ward off the gropers but was still getting crushed on all sides.  

“Yaoyorozu, what we need is to stop them from rioting." Said Izuku, he saw Uraraka was starting to panic a little trying to press back against others without using her fingertips, pushing her back into Izuku’s. Iida was attempting to call out to the others while chopping his arms. The arms were trapped against his chest.  

“I’ll take any idea right now Deku, before Bakugo starts bombing the crap out of us!” Uraraka shouted over the clamor of shouts, as at the back of the crowd was the distinct sound of mini explosions that were trying to attract attention but were instead making the crowd closer to the front start to panic even more.  

‘ Think, think, think, how do we solve this, what can we do? What would Lucy do? What would Charlie do? What would Luffy do!?’  

“Midoriya, they need a voice, someone who can quell them, and regulate the reporters.” said Yaoyorozu, nodding at the entrance of the hallway. 
“Midoriya, send me, I can be of assistance for this, we just need to get me up there.” said Iida. Izuku considered his options and called out to each of the crew. 

“Yaoyorozu, we need a bullhorn,” she produced one from her thigh, already in the process of making one, “Uraraka, I need you to remove mine and Iida’s gravity,” she nodded and began to reach for them, “Mei... you wouldn’t happen to have a rocket would you?” he half joked, they would need something to get them up to the entrance.  

“Yup, I can whip one up quick as a-”  

“On second thought, I retract that request. I don’t want anything too drastic. Iida, hand on to me and grab that bullhorn, Uraraka, float us.” This all done, the two levitated and with blackwhip unfurled, Izuku dragged them over the crowd towards the entrance. Iida tried holding on but was forced to juggle the bullhorn while being moved at breakneck speed.  

Just as they landed over the entrance, some looking up at them, others focused on oushing their way out, Izuku held the Bullhorn up to Iida’s mouth and latched them both in place while they were still levitating. ‘ Uraraka has been practicing, she’s holding us both up and only looks like she might throw up.’  

“ATTENTION! Could all students please calm down! This is just confusion caused by the media breaking in. Please don’t panic. The teachers are working to remove the intruders as we speak.” Iida called out, Izuku decided to help by using one blackwhip strand to point towards the window and encourage them to look outside. Soon more began to see, and the crowd slowly dispersed into empty classrooms and halls.  

Finally petered out and exhausted, 1-A returned to class to finalize their class representative. Izuku was no longer shaking in his boots standing behind the podium next to a very reserved Yaoyorozu. Floating in front of a mass of students and drawing all eyes to him was not the crash course media lesson he was hoping for, but it certainly helped that he felt more afraid afterwards dealing with reporters than he did addressing his class. Thankfully All Might and Midnight arrived to disperse the invading reporters.  

“Interview training might have to be moved up in the curriculum. Can’t have you freezing in front of a camera every time it’s shoved in your face Midoriya.” Midnight informed him. He and Iida couldn’t exactly escape the snapshots and mics pointed in their faces when they were still floating. So, he finally pulled himself towards the awaiting trio of Yaoyorozu, Uraraka and Mei, who gave Uraraka a device around her neck pressure point to alleviate her nausea. Until she removed it and all that nausea came rushing back. Momo was handy with a bucket just in case.  

He turned to Yaoyorozu, who looked back at him with confusion. Then he addressed the class.  

“I’m sorry but I’m not ready to be your class representative. I can’t accept the position, even after you voted for me.” The class gasped and whispered conspiratorially. Aizawa raised an unimpressed brow, unhappy this farce would most likely be stretched into the next day. Not that he cared, the class didn’t need a representative since they were focused on heroics studies. Iida and Uraraka looked more concerned than affronted, aware of just how nervous the whole concept seemed to him.  

“What I mean is, that during the student rush, I panicked. I couldn’t make a decision, and it almost led to people being hurt in the crush. Clearly, I have much to learn, and you deserve a representative who can think ahead in stressful situations. And obviously someone who doesn’t look like they sweat buckets just for being put in the spotlight.” he laughed, much to the amusement of the class. He turned back to his vice. “Yaoyorozu. You had a plan ready to go and predicted what resources we needed to succeed. You were calm under pressure and have a greater mind for academics than i could hope for. Therefore, I would like to resign as Representative and elect you as my replacement.” She looked shocked at that, as if she assumed the class would have to vote again. Izuku turned to look at Iida. He looked back and raised a hand to stop him, shook his head, and nodded back at the two of them. Izuku sighed and accepted Iida's choice.  

Yaoyorozu stepped forward and Izuku stepped back, “Midoriya, it shows great maturity to acknowledge your shortcomings and to consider the needs of those in your care. While I would normally chastise you, as I’m sure Mr Aizawa would, for reneging on your duties when push comees  to shove, I think in this case we can take the real world applications out of it.”  

Aizawa didn’t seem able to respond to that, his face hidden beneath his scarf. Internally though, ‘ Am I really that predictable? Can she read me that easily? Midoriya alread did, now this. And now they’re working together! Oh this isn’t good.’  

Izuku was relieved and still a little proud he had gotten support from his peers, especially since the class agreed to it. ‘ I may not be a captain yet Luffy. But I don’t have to do it your way. I’ll find my own.’  

---

Hazbin Hotel, Hell  

Reinforcements were needed but none were coming. If the mob at UA was riot, this was a tsunami of bottom scraping reporters. Every window on every floor was blotted out by the sheer number of flying imps with cameras. The flash of bulbs and raucous blare of questions mixed together to form a audio-visual migraine. Pentious was doing his best to nail down every door, barking out orders like a general to baton down the hatches. Husk was mixing up a storm of Molotov's at the bar while Angel was assembling a barricade out of the furniture. Nifty blitzed the floors, pulling the curtains on every window and laying out her latest order from Loopty and Lyle, a welcome mat with nails in it, at every window.  

Charlie was writing her speech at such a fast pace, smoke trailed off the page and ignited each one after three sentences. With a growl of frustration, she brushed away the ashes and started anew. Vaggie was now readying the spears in the barricade. Charlie had to admit, it was certainly a romantic image, “Very Les Mis, Angel, nicely done.”  

Vaggie had mounted the last spear, when the door started shuddering with the force of a battering ram. It seems Katie Killjoy had decided to drop all pretenses and was now using some makeshift ram attached to her news van to bust her way in.  

“Of all the times for Alastor to disappear.” Vaggie moaned, bracing herself against the door and digging her heels in.  

“Hye, you were the one who-”  

“Yes, I know Angel, it’s just, ugh, wish for a calm day, end up with the Alamo.” The door shook again aand her heels scraped the ground, “He’s definitely going to be in charge of repairs for missing all this.”  

Charlie finally managed to prepare her speech, a twenty-flashcard deep set for her to quickly read through. She breathed deep, released and beamed widely for the crowd. “OK, Vaggie, you’re with me. We’re going out there.” Vaggie nodded and in a flash of fire the two disappeared and reappeared outside. They quickly leapt to the right to avoid being rammed by Killjoys makeshift ram, Tom Trench tied to the hood of the van and aimed headfirst at the door.  

“Ladies, Gentlemen, Hell spawn and Killjoy.” Charlie began.  

“Bitch!”  

“I understand there has been some speculation abhout the nature of our hotel and I am fuly prepared to offer a statement about our role in Hells future. For starters, our Hotel caters to denizens of Hell and the rehabilitation of Sinners. Rehabilitation, as defined by websters Dictionary-”  

“Charlie for the love of God, do not use the dictionary as a literal source for your speech!”  

“Lucy, please, I’m in the middle of a press conference.” Charlie argued, Vaggie tried to raiise a point not to speak into the pentascroll but the damage had been done.  

“Dude, no, lame and unoriginal. Silco always said to use the community and identity to think about what they want.”  

“ThankyouJinx, that’s... that’s really helpful. Ahem, we know why you are all here. And the truth is as you’ve heard. We welcome all comers and with open arms. Hopefully through you, we can spread our message far and wide, encouraging more sinners to join our cause. Maybe then, the sinners of Hell will never need to fear the Exorcist blade again.”  

The reporters piped up once more with a tumultuous frenzy as questions bombarded Charlie from all sides. Charlie was at first taken aback, especiually when they began to close in on her and forced Vaggie to take a defensive stance in front.  

“katie Killjoy, 666 News, if what you are saying is true, then that means we might not be so royally fucked, is that accurate?” Katie’s rictus grin flashed manic teeth as she held a mic out.  

“That would be accurate, we hope to get as many people through our doors and out the other end, smiling and happy.”  

“That’s all I needed to hear. I thought for sure I’d have to sound clip the shit out of this, but you just come out and say it, damn.”  

“We have nothing to hide here in our hotel. Do not let the boarded windows deceive you. Vaggie, tell Pentious and Nifty to tear down the boards. The truth of the matter is, all we need is your word of mouth and we caaaaaaan...” She gestured for the crowd to complete her sentence.  

“TRAIN SINNERS TO BE EXORCIST HUNTERS!” the crowd responded together.  

“That’s right, train to be ex... or... cist... kill... ers..., sorry could you run that by me again.”  

“Tom Trench, Evening Agony, reports have flooded in that your Hotel is no serving as the perfect training commune for Sinners to take up arms against the Exorcists in the coming four months, any chance we could see some of the training in person?”  

“Wait what?”  

“Ah, I gotcha, keeping it secret in case the Exorcists are watching, well how about seeing some of the troops in action?”  

Charlie stared blankly at the expecting reporters, unsure how to respond. Training compound, fighting exorcists, where had all that come from. She raised a hand, taking a moment to think of an answer. Killjoy smiled smugly right at her.  

“...THIS CONFERENCE IS OVER, BEAT IT!” Charlie yelled out over the din of questions.  

“What’s the matter? Fake news?”  

“Oh look, I’ve spotted a cunt, good day!” She slammed the doors shut behind her and panted heavily. The rest of the residents stared at her expectantly. Crymini stepped forward first.  

“So, how’d it go?”  

---

Kamino Ward, Japan  

A newspaper covering the events of earlier that day was splayed out on the bar top. Kurogiri was wiping down a glass as he was programmed to do, to occupy his hands when not ordered to do anything else. He was waiting on orders from his master's apprentice, perusing the newspaper using two fingers in one hand, and in the other hand he leafed through the schedule for the UA brats. The USJ would be the perfect spot for them to corner and harass their bait, with enough time to cause some real collateral damage and lay the trap for All Might to bumble into.  

The newspaper showed a snapshot of two students who soothed the angry mass of students, awkwardly levitating above them and shouting into a bullhorn. One was holding them in place by anchoring them down with black tendrils.  

He poked at the picture of the two, particularly Midoriya, poke, poke, poke. He stared disinterestedly at the two of them. He got what he came for, leave it to the hero wannabes to play the role, however short they might do so.  

Sensei instructed him to gauge their reactions and plan accordingly. Looks like he was cutting the communication line. But damn the media if they weren’t thorough. Tracking that fool of a reporter back home and dusting her before she could publish the pictures she got of him meant he could slip under the radar a little longer.  

The problem is of course, where one reporter may have candidly taken pictures of Shigaraki acting suspiciously, another was looking for him, whether they knew it or not. He may have dusted one reporter among the masses, but it’s impossible to cover all bases.  

---

VVV headquarters  

The cyberaquarium surrounded the scheming Vee’s as they reviewed todays success. True the hotel only got a few cosmetic scuffs and Charlie talked the frenzied reporters down, but now the hotel was running double duty as a boot camp/fortress and a spa retreat. Neither complimented the other and would attract diametrically opposed factions.  

“Gotta say, the Hotel might by off limits, but attacks from proxies have been far more successful than attacks from within.” said the slithery tones of Valentino. He waxed his bedazzled pistol to retain its shine, hopeful someone would catch the moment he blew Angels kneecaps out. Apparently the snuff crowd were itching for extremes only he could deliver. Velvette had her phone linked up to the projector and scrolled through clips of news and live streamers discussing the recent turnaround of Hazbin hotel. She smiled toothily, pausing on an image of Charlie looking flustered and screenshotted it with various emojis and hashtags.  

Vox stared intently at the footage; each clip zapped directly to his screen face and fast-forwarded. He paused and examined each one frame by frame, finding an image of the Hotel interior.  
“Voxy, don’t you agree? Hmm? Ugh, Velvette, darling, Vox is ignoring me, make him stop.” Val pouted. Velvette looked up from her phone a moment, looked back and without looking tossed a voxtech mug straight at Vox’s screen.  

The footage on his screen paused and he grabbed the mug before it hit. He flashed back to his original face and glowered.  

“What’s got you all huffy, princess?” Velvette asked.  

“Pretty sure you’re the only one with princess envy her Vel, or have you burned a hole through your phone yet?” Vox snarked back at her. She raised the finger in response.  

“Ooh, catty, what’s got you riled up?”  

Vox showcased screenshots of every clip of the hotel, including pictures captured by their imps of the other floors, “Where is Alastor?”  

---

Arlong Park, Conomi Islands  

It’s been nearly two months since Nami’s last haul and the fishmen were getting antsy. Every second Arlong sat in his own paradise, free from humans and attractions a plenty, he rankled a little bit more. Sticking around the East Blue was supposed to be a stopgap to wiping out the swine in the marines and knocking those celestial dragons down a peg. But he had made base for so long he was reluctant to leave it. Krieg, Buggy, Kuro, Tequila Wolf, he had outlasted them all. But the Grand Line belonged top the Warlords. And Jimbe was out there, waiting for him to slip up. He'd need the Berry, and he’d need the right ship, something that would make big bro Ti proud. Then he could make a stand against Jimbe and maybe get the big blue bastard to join his crusade, just like old times.  

‘ At the very least, maybe I’ll see Shyarly soon. But Jimbe better not go near her, the bastard.’  

His rumination was broken by Kuroobi. He didn't look at all pleased. Either that was because he had bad news or because he was carrying the chatter box severed head of that damned clown.  

“Hey, Arlong, baby c’mon, surely, I’ve proven my value so far, enough to get my body back. Just go east by southeast and you’ll find that red head minx.”  

Arlong leaned into the head and snarled at him, saw tipped nose running its blades over the bulbous red nose and nicking its flesh, “We’re finished, when I say we’re finished.”  

“Well can we get a move on then, cause those losers are talking my ear off. Well, it's already off but-” Arlong launched a punch right into Buggy’s jaw and clicked his teeth.  

“Enough with the jokes. Put him in a bag and get the boat ready. We’re bringing Nami back. Now.” Kurobi nodded and marched away, still holding the head away from him like a rotten pineapple.  

“Eugh, man, tough crowd. Maybe I can get some yucks from Straw Hat, he’s probably going insane talking to thin air. I don’t know who this Vi chick is, but she needs to get laid quick.”  

Arlong sighed in frustration. The map was near completion, just five more quadrants and the grand line map, then he’d be ready. He made his way to the docks and blocked out Chew bitching about pulling a boat like it was manual labor.  

‘ This was so much easier when Hatchan was around.’  

Notes:

Please leave a review if you can, literally anything will keep my motivation alive long enough to finish this.

Chapter 19: Using technology to help each other, progress.

Summary:

When you put together an insane entourage of scientists and give each other access to unfathomable technology, should you be surprised when they decide to breach the very fabric of reality.

At least the group is opening up more. That won't have dark ramifications.

Notes:

Fast update, might be a shorter chapter. But I'm trying this out. Just getting you guys content, it doesn't have to be thousands of words, just progress.

EDIT: Update, I accidentally uploaded only half of what I wrote for this chapter, the letter half. I’m updating this chapter to include the missing first half.

Group Therapy Sub-Group, while Charlie and Izuku are dealing with the press.

 

Vi: Soooo, do we talk about our feelings or...

 

Nami: Oh wow, you’ve never honestly spoken about your feelings before, have you?

 

 Usopp: Maybe start off softer. How about talking about the weather?

 

Sanji: Oi, chore boy, you’re wanted on deck, dishes to clean.

 

Luffy: They’re never ending. Have you tried throwing them away, promise I’ll pay you back for the new ones.

 

Nami: We’re paying them back already for the meal.

 

Usopp: We?

 

Sanji: Nami, darling, I wouldn’t take a penny from your beautiful hands.

 

Nami: Good, every cent goes to... it’s not up for debate.

 

Vi: Seriously, how much did you spend on a meal. And is washing dishes seriously an option?

 

Sanji: Can’t very well call in the marines over a small matter of payment. Half the staff are already press ganged into being waiters and chefs.

 

Nami: Including your Maitre'd, the fishman?

 

Sanji: ...yeeesss? Though to be fair, that was because he was shipwrecked in a party boat and was already one before we got our hands on him.

 

Vi: My racist senses are tingling. I’m sensing some bad blood for a guy you’ve never met before.

 

Nami: You’re imagining things.

 

Luffy: That waiter guy, he so nice, even gave us a table when we asked.

 

Nami: ...yeaaaaahhhh.

 

Vi: I dunno, I’m picking up on that passive aggressive way of talking like the way I talk about the prison guards at Stillwater.

 

Nami: There is NOTHING subtle about the way you talk about those guys. You think I don’t hear the venom drip from your mouth the way you talk about Piltover and all the people in it.

 

Vi: OK, I admit I’ve got a chip on my shoulder. More like they dislocated it and hacked at it with an ax but it’s there.

 

Usopp: So, is this the moment you tell us why you’re upset?

 

Nami: Why do you and Luffy insist on poking me about this. This is my business and I don’t need you getting involved.

 

Luffy: But why did you stick around?

 

Nami: I...I...

 

Luffy: You said Zoro would die, and you knew we would stay with him. You came back anyway. Right before he was cut.

 

Usopp: I never said it did I? Thank you, for holding my hand. I admit, Kuro scared me, but I had no idea what was going to happen. Then you showed up and I felt a little better.

 

Vi: You guys seem pretty confident about that, how come?

 

Usopp: Because she did the same for Kaya. And I wasn’t so scared of Kuru anymore. Because Kaya was safe with you to protect her.

 

Nami: You guys are the worst pirates I have ever met. You have no cohesion, no plan and no sense of self preservation. If I dragged into my problems, you’d literally just throw yourselves at the problem until you all died.

 

Luffy: Probably.

 

Vi: Best course of action honestly.

 

Jinx: You would think that.

 

Nami: If we had Izuku here, he’d be formulating plans left and right to outmaneuver the marines. If Charlie were her, she’d most likely talk them to death but by God we’d have the powers of Hell to fall back on. Heck, even Lucy would try to defuse the situation instead of charging in head long.

 

Luffy: Yeah, but that would be no fun.

 

Nami: Luffy, this is not fun and games, lives are at stake! Zoro is clinging to life in my bed because you want to do what's interesting instead of what keeps them safe.

 

Luffy: Yeah, but is that really living? Doing what’s expected of you, playing it safe. You need to take risks in life and actually live before you die. That’s what Sabo did, that's what Ace learned from, it’s what I learned from.

 

Nami: you really want to get into this. Because it’s not pretty.

 

Luffy; Nah, like Sanji said, plates.

 

Sanji: Wait, Luffy, you can’t walk out on a lady telling you her life story.

 

Luffy: Sure I can, I need to take things seriously, right?

 

Nami: Well then how about the last time I put my trust in someone to get me out of the weeds. Because you’re not the first.

 

Usopp: Nami, how long have you been in this position?

 

Nami: Since I stopped being a little girl. And I tried; I really did. To forget what they did to me, to my family. But at some point, I just wanted out. I wasn’t even thinking about my family, just that I had to get out.

 

Sanji: Yeah, getting away from it all. It’s not easy.

 

Vi: Sometimes it’s so damn impossible to forget.

 

Nami: Well, one time I couldn’t. I had a friend, if you could call him that, he never did anything to me. Never spoke up for me either, but he made sure I never went hungry, always got me some Tangerines from my grove. He made some great Takoyaki.

 

Sanji: Fishman, right? Yeah, they have the palate for it, learned so many things from watching them.

 

Nami: Hatchan, or Hatchi, was part of the crew. Never acted like it, don’t even know why he stuck around. Maybe it was the Berry, maybe satisfaction, who knows.

 

Usopp: Maybe it was you?

 

Nami: No, no, not a chance. All I know is one day I had a chance. It was there in front of me, I was so damn tired and scared and he came up to me saying he was shipping out. The life wasn’t for him anymore, whatever that meant, and he wanted to take me with him. I packed up my quills, my tools, everything I needed to chart the seas wherever we were going.

 

Vi: He left, didn’t he?

 

Nami: Deep down he was a coward. His type always are. I don’t hate fishmen Sanji, I hate those fishmen. And they made sure to remind me what I was. Who I belonged to.

 

Usopp: Woah, is that a...

 

Sanji: Arlong pirate's tattoo. I’ve seen it a few times.

 

Nami: So you know, I’m a pirate for another crew. A crew who could rip us to pieces without trying. And soon they’ll come for me. I’ve been out of it for too long. So you guys need to get the Hell out of here!

 

Luffy: Hey Sanji, Zeff told me to get you to help me with the plates. Apparently Gin was supposed to help but I keep breaking too many plates.

 

Vi: DUDE! WHAT THE FUCK?

 

Jinx: Bad timing my man.

 

Sanji: Do you even care? When someone opens up to you, especially a crew mate, you lend an ear at any time.

 

Luffy: Usopp, check on Zoro, maybe he needs some water. Or food, maybe we can force feed him.

 

Usopp: Uh Luffy, I think we need to handle this.

 

Nami: Do you even want me on this crew? Heck, you completely ignored what I had to say about Arlong, do you even know what he did, who I am?

 

Vi: Does it even matter? I mean seriously, after everything, even this bullshit we went through. Does that past even matter?

 

Jinx: It doesn’t... right?

 

Luffy: I have no idea who he is. But if he comes here, I guess I’ll just beat him up.

 

Nami: He will tear you apart and you will completely throw out every plan I made for the entirety of my life.

 

Luffy: I guess.

 

Nami: LUFFY! I...I... what more can I say?

 

Luffy: That you’re a Straw Hat. You are our crew.

 

Nami: But what I did? WHAT’S COMING FOR YOU BECAUSE OF ME!?

 

Luffy: Yup.

 

Usopp: Luffy.

 

Vi: Woah.

 

Sanji: Bloody hell.

 

Jinx: Just like that?

 

Nami: Luffy... please... help me.

 

Luffy: Of course I will…You hear me multiverse, OF COURSE I WILL!


Zoro: Yo, heard yelling. We fighting now?

 

Luffy/Nami: ZORO!

 

Vi: Fuck me, this therapy stuff is the real deal. Guess all we needed was me.

 

Usopp: Actually, we needed Luffy, you just made things worse.

 

---

Group Chat Normal, one hour later

 

Jinx: Sooo, we’ve been talking. 

 

Cait: Never a good sign. 

 

Baxter: The scientific elite will not be mocked in its new hay-day. 

 

Mei: We thought, what if we, build a portal to each other’s dimension. 

 

Ekko: You can’t see me, but I am gesturing very strongly with my hands so I don’t break anything here… whaaaat? 

 

Izuku: I really need to know, how did you make the leap from sharing invention ideas to punching a hole in existence? How are you even able to talk to them Hatsume? 

 

Mei: The hero girl gave me her phone to upgrade, I backed up its content in case it got damaged , she got a brand new phone that is way sleeker than this old model and I got a look at that tasty app now on my phone. 

 

Ekko: Again, what?  

 

Lucy: Jeeze, this doohickey is easier to hack than a Vaul-tec terminal. What’s to stop other people in our universes from stealing this tech? 

Izuku: I think the best option moving forward is figuring out some sort of stronger link between
worlds. And limit who can see this technology or who we trust to tell how it works.


Jinx: Like the teleporter! 


Baxter: Not exactly a teleport, more quantum superposition mailbox. You enter the device in one end and exit out the other like an elevator. 

 

Zoro: You need a better name.  

 

Luffy: I just heard something cool and I can’t even remember what you just said. 

 

Jinx: Skill issue. 

 

Uraraka: Hey I can barely understand what they said. 

 

Jinx: Like I said, skill issue. 

 

Uraraka: I… uh, walked into that one. 

 

Izuku: What do you need? 

 

Baxter: First we need a source of extraordinary power from each universe to supercharge the device and we need the algorithm for this communication network so we ascertain universal co-ordinates. 

 

Usopp: Dang, I left my engine at home, what are the odds? 

 

Izuku: Where do we find the energy source? 

 

Jinx: I’m guessing we only need enough from three sources from three universes. More than half of them. 

 

Mei: Pretty sure we can build them. 

 

Iida: What about Power Loader!? 

 

Mei: Oh yeah, I can ask him! 

 

Iida: No, I mean his classes, shouldn’t you be studying? 

 

Mei: Eh he put me on academic probation, I turned in all my assignments for the first month so I could build with my free time. 

 

Jinx: It’s like looking at a me that went to school. 

 

Vi: You would never do the homework. 

 

Jinx: Pretty sure I did all your homework so you could run out and beat up muggers. 

 

Vi: They were on our turf! 

 

Lucy: I bet this vault has some lab equipment I could use to look at my pipboy.  

 

Nami: Lucy you had to pull their teeth just to find out what they were hiding, I really don’t think they’ll let you in on their research. 

 

Luffy: It would be pretty funny if we stopped there and a couple hours later Lucy called back to say she got because she did all that. 

 

Nami: This isn’t a cartoon, what, you think we’re watching Sora, Warrior of the Sea? 

 

Lucy: Oh man, I wonder if they have any of Coopers old movies, ohh, maybe even Silver Shadow! 

 

Izuku: Nami’s right. You’ll need to be forthcoming about why you need access, so that means admitting the existence of either the multiverse chat or Moldaver. 

 

Cait: I’d hesitate about mentioning the chat. We don’t know who could be looking. 

 

Lucy: Too be fair, they are a hole in the ground group of recluses who have spent years trying to work out this genetic mutation function. I don’t know if they are in contact with other scientists. 

 

Vi: You didn’t even know anything about their secret lab until you threatened violence, you don’t know what they can do or what they have. For all you know, this whole thing is a front for some shady science group to experiment on people. 

 

Cait: Exactly, good instincts. 

 

Crymini: Any chance you could ask the developer how to use the code? 

 

Baxter: What the, Miss Crymini, have you been observing me this whole time? 

 

Crymini: Don’t make it weird dude, I was eavesdropping and thought it sounded cool. 

 

Mei: Cool, another scientist. 

 

Baxter: Unfortunately no, Crymini is a mere audience member to us thespians of the science stage. An avid watcher but no more. 

 

Crymini: Hey, fuck you too dude. 

 

Cait: Bloody hell, what’s with the red tape? 

 

Vi: Yeah, let her check it out if it’s so cool. We need all the help we can get. 

 

Baxter: Ugh very well, Miss Crymini, the Einstein-Rosen bridge was a theoretical principal proposed to explain which physics phenomenon? 

 

Nami: Dude are seriously testing her? 

 

Vi: C’mon! 

 

Baxter: Oh that is a very reasonable question to ask of someone who’s going to be experimenting with black holes and wormholes. 

 

Uraraka: Maybe try not to gatekeep science since we need as many as possible. After all, how are more people supposed to get into science if you won’t tell them or you make them feel stupid for not knowing that the Einstein-Rosen Bridge was conceived as a theoretical tunnel through spacetime that could connect two distant points in the universe. 

 

Baxter: You know physics? 

 

Uraraka: I break physics for homework. I also have Google, lake any normal person and can learn that bullshit in minutes. Give her a chance! 

 

Baxter: I’ll consider it once we acknowledge the enormity of our task. 

 

Uraraka: Hey Deku, Momo is smart. And Iida and Todoroki, though he’s more reclusive than the rest of class. 

 

Izuku: What about Bakugo and Mineta? 

 

Uraraka: No and no. I don’t like Mineta perving out over the girls in the chat and Bakugo seems more like the guy to yell at us for doing it wrong. 

 

Vi: Nah, this Bakugo guy seems like a piece of work, sounds he’d sooner explode at you than take orders from our actual smart guys. 

 

Izuku: He was always top of the class and studied hard though. 

 

Uraraka: I thought you dropped his ass. 

 

Izuku: I did, I am, it’s complicated. He’s in my class, I can’t just ignore him, especially if he comes to me for assistance as one of the class representatives. 

 

Zoro: I really don’t think he’s going to be asking you for help. 

 

Izuku: Wait, Crymini, what were you talking about earlier? 

 

Crymini: Now you talk to me, did you just realise? I was talking about going to the guy who made this app and asking them for the code or shit you need. 

 

Usopp: He did contact us to help us talk more. 

 

Lucy: It’s worth a shot, at least we can figure some stuff out about how he made it. 

 

Izuku: Well, we have a training session in a few hours and Luffy, Nami, you need to work out a plan to fight off those pirates. While we’re travelling, I’ll get in contact with K. 

 

Baxter: Crymini, would care to partake in an experiment of universal proportions? 

 

Crymini: Charlie would probably make me take part as part of some community service or some shit. 

 

Baxter: I believe you are confusing this with prison my dear. 

 

Crymini: Call me dear again and I will shove you through the nearest wormhole. 

 

Cait: I’ll ask Jayce, if we have the free time, his work on teleportation and hex tech magic science has advanced us leaps and bounds beyond other countries. 

 

Usopp: Isn’t magic science just alchemy? 

 

Cait: Shut up, this is totally different. 

 

Izuku: Say Crymini, why is this project interesting to you? 

 

Crymini: I don’t know… I guess, different universes means a way out of Hell. Who knows, maybe I could get out of here, Hells no picnic. And, maybe, it might help Charlie get off our backs, Y’know, if she could just send us to someplace better. 

 

Izuku: Fair enough. 

---

 

Nami: Midoriya, Charlie, Lucy, I would like to say something. 

 

Charlie: mmmmm, ok, ok, calm down, be serious, Nami, thank you for choosing to confide in us. 

 

Nami: This isn’t a therapy session, alright, I’m coming to you guys as... I am willing to trust you. 

 

Izuku: We’re prepared to listen. 

 

Vi: All ears. 

 

Lucy: It’ll be good to hear from someone who’s also in a bind. As soon as things are sorted out here, I’m marching across the desert with whatever supplies I can carry, and I really want to take my mind off the head we have to find. 

 

Nami: It’s been weeks, that thing has gotta be rank. Well, I’ll tell you all here and now, I was a member of Arlong’s Pirates for many years. Even now, I’m technically a part of it.  

 

Vaggie: Damn. Just come right out and say it. 

 

Vi: Honestly, having these group sessions without someone else to instruct us or watch us makes it so much easier to talk about all our bullshit. 

 

Lucy: Well that’s the nature of the chat. But it only works if you trust us. 

 

Nami: Honestly, you guys are so completely nuts and change the subject so often, I firmly believe that I could have dropped that into the chat and you wouldn’t even have noticed. I mean, Luffy didn’t even care. 

 

Izuku: Nor should we. You are what’s most important. 

 

Nami: I haven’t told you the story yet guys. 

 

Uraraka: Eh, you let Jinx into the chat, everyone else’s baggage becomes pretty passe.  

 

Jinx: Speaking of baggage, where we at with that head?... Hey wait a minute gravity girl, why am I the one to set the bar? 

 

Charlie: Let’s not dwell on it; we’re healing, yay! 

 

Lucy: Heads lost for sure but not completely. My pip-boy should be able to pick up the tracker I shoved in there once I get back to the surface. 

 

Vi: Wow, desecration of a corpse, you are racking up a rap sheet as long as a gigalodon. 

 

Luffy: What’s that? 

 

Zoro: Shark I’m guessing. Big ass shark. 

 

Luffy: Question, can you cook it? 

 

Sanji: Makes for good broth.  

 

Nami: What are we talking about? I step out for like a minute to pay for our supplies and... 

 

Luffy: We're planning some shark meals. 

 

Sanji: Interested? How ‘bout a shark fin ramen bowl? 

 

Nami: I think I might vomit. Please, I don’t want you carving up Arlong! 

 

Sanji: Man lays his hands on you; they lose their hands. 

 

Zoro: Pipe down, you just got here. 

 

Vi: Yeah, maybe tone down the whole hero act until we get to a first name basis. 

 

Sanji: First off, I don’t work for you, swordsman. Second, I can gladly reign it in if I’m making you uncomfortable. 

 

Nami: Finally. I think I’ve gotten a handle of this chat that I can time it perfectly to when you go off on a tangent and I can have time to read a book. 

 

Uraraka: Hmm... oh right, the chat, sorry I zoned out as soon as Luffy went on a tangent about food. 

Sanji: What about this, huh? 

 

Sanji uploaded a picture to chat. (Zoro still bandaged, sat at the food nook eating a large plate of Oni Giri and sushi rolls. Luffy is being restrained by Nami and Usopp.) 

 

Izuku: Woah, major deliciousness. 

 

Uraraka: I want to eat my new phone, how is that possible? 

 

Lucy: I have... A MIGHTY NEED. Sorry, sorry, I haven’t seen a dish that looked so unprocessed in my whole life. 

 

Charlie: What about your wedding, you mentioned you had that before? 

 

Lucy: Canned spam and Jello molds.  

 

Zoro: I think the waiter just had a stroke. Also, stop take pictures of me while I’m eating.

 

Sanji: SPAM for a wedding. You need to figure out this box thing so I can send you some decent food. No, exceptional food.  

 

Nami: Yeah, anyway Arlongs on his way. 

 

Lucy: I look forward to your bountiful meal. I’m sure it’s as delicious as it is beautiful. 

 

Sanji: If I can make it half as beautiful as you, then I will have succeeded. 

 

Vi: She is so tomato faced right now. 

 

Uraraka: I would be too if someone was that confident to use a line like that on me. 

 

Jinx: You’re not the only one, right Vi? 

 

Vi: I don’t want to hear a peep about my gooey feelings coming from you at all. I don’t have gooey feelings, iit’s pure stone, got that. 

 

Sanji: ooh, scandalous, sound off in that chat, how are we feeling? 

 

Izuku: Errrrrmmm! 

 

Cait: Errrrrrrrrmmm! 

 

Iida: Midoriya, you’ve suffered heat stroke. 

 

Mei: He musta malfunctioned. 

 

Ekko: Well that didn’t last long, Vi, we just finished. As soon as she’s finished her meltdown, we’ll take you to met Cait’s mom. 

 

Vi: Her MOM! 

 

Cait: MY MOM! 

 

Angel: Already meeting the parents, you move fast. 

 

Notes:

OK, that should read better. Thanks to Matt for raising awareness that my story about Hachi wasn’t here, I never realised until after I posted and you guys commented that I left out a large portion of this chapter.

Kudos & Comment

Chapter 20: The negotiations are short

Summary:

An experiment can connect us with other dimensions and potentially solve our resources issue!
Yay!
But we need to harness a crap tonne of power to make it work and potentially move your community above ground~
Boo!
Also we may be the most violent thing to happen to you vault.
Can you go now!

Chapter 20  

Izuku: And that’s our plan.  

 

Lucy: Use trans dimensional wormhole theory and quantum physics to send each other letters. That’s pretty swell, lets do this!  

 

Jinx: One small snag.  

 

Mei: We’re gonna need, about, two...hundred megawatts of energy on your end to power it.  

 

Lucy: I’m sorry I had to read that twice, two hundred... you want two hundred million watts of energy?  

 

Baxter: I mean, is that really such a tall order? Slap together a few nuclear fission reactors, should be right up your world's alley with its foray into nuclear power.  

 

Vi: What, you think she just has a few of those lying around.  

 

Lucy: Well, Vault Four has one.  

 

Vi: Never mind, we’re back in business.  

 

Lucy: I’m sure I can work something out... who am I kidding, this is way to tall an ask. And that Birdie seriously gives me weird vibes.  

 

Vi: You backing down from some chick with bad vibes?  

 

Lucy: She scares me, OK!? Those piercing eyes and the way she just shows up out of nowhere.  

 

User: Lucy, still here?  

Lucy: Holy crap! How did you get there?  

 

User: You’ve been standing outside Bens office for the past ten minutes talking into your pit boy. Must be a scintillating conversation.  

 

Lucy: I don’t suppose...  

 

User: That I don’t mention you are speaking to some unknown entity about the layout of our vault, practically broadcasting our presence to the wasteland.  

 

Lucy: Yeah, that. Would you like to talk them, their scientists like the folks here in the vault.  

 

User: What are you after Lucy? Right now, we’re supposed to be having our Flame ceremony.  

 

Jinx: Awesome, can we join, LUCY, start streaming, I want to get this in HD.  

 

Lucy: Not NOW Jinx. Birdie, I would like to speak to Benjamine one last time and, if the invitationis still open, I would love to join your ceremony.  

 

User name changed to Birdie  

 

Birdie: Heh, alright. I must admit, you are one of the few people to actually get around his bureaucracy.  

 

Lucy: I’d also like to go to the ceremony and tell everyone, just how sorry I am that they were subjected to such... brutality. I used to believe the vaults were our salvation. Now...  

 

Birdie: Save your pity. They just want to live. This is a safe haven for the mutated and baseline alike. We have no qualms about your appearance. I would’ve thought you felt the same, what with your ghoul friend.  

 

Lucy: Yes, you’re right. I’m fearing more and more that I’ve led a really sheltered life.  

 

Vi: DUUUUUUUHHHH  

 

Cait: And this, mother, is my ally, Viol-Vi, what are you doing?  

 

Vi: Um. Shit.  

 

Vi has logged off.  

 

Izuku: You’re scientists, right? This isn’t just about surviving in the Vault; it’s about living, like Birdie said.  

 

Charlie: Not just survival, huh. I guess a lot of us really do feel that way.  

 

Izuku: This was a place that said you would be nothing but experiments. Products. But you have proven yourself to be so much more. You’re a community.   

 

Lucy: He’s right, you can’t all just stay down here waiting for the shoe to drop. Prayers will keep you centered, help you remember your past, but maybe I can provide a path out of here. And not a leave here just because, but leave here with prospects waiting for you top side.  

 

Birdie: I think we might be curious. Tell Ben, he’ll tell me. We’ll put it to a vote if your scientific theory, whatever it is, is sound.  

---

Lucy sat before the desk of the overseer, all three of his eyes wide with disbelief. It was unnerving but she swallowed the discomfort and stared him directly in the eyes. He steepled his fingers and pondered the situation. Amid pondering, he reached for a mug and took a cursory sip. He spat it out to the side and put the mug down next to a pile of other mugs.  

“Was this the moldy pile or the fresh pile. Better check.” he reached for one of the other dozen mugs.  

“They’re moldy!” Lucy cried desperately, hackles rising at the notion there was so much mold in this one room, localized entirely in a pile of mugs. Lucy held up her pip-boy, chat open and ready to recieve and project the contents of this conversation.  

 

User: Putting all of our energy into building a surface sanctuary. It’s going to open up a lot of fresh wounds. A lot of folks here are not too keen on returning to the surface where they belong.  

 

Jinx: Wait, you want to oust the unwanted from your underground settlement to the upper surface.  

 

User: Sums it up pretty like a bow. Wait, you're not one of those surface activists, are you? I get it, we should offer refuge, me and Goosey had the exact same conversation.  

 

Jinx: Nah, it’s just weird seeing this from the other way round.   

 

Cait: Feel like we should address what he just said, anybody... nobody?  

 

Charlie: Think of it less as urban renewal and more as an... outreach program. Think about it, a settlement surrounding the entrance to the Vault, concealing its contents, an added layer of security. They can begin a new source of nutrition, heck, some of our boffins can pull up some schematics for Solar Panels. There’s so much altruism and charity it’s making my head spin.   

 

Vaggie: Try not to spin some ideas from this for the hotel, we really need to nip these hotel fortress rumors in the bud, not turn it into Epcot.  

 

Usopp: Actually it might be good to look for alternative ways out. I mean, the worst can happen, cave-ins, soldiers could trap you inside and you might run out resources and starve to death!  

 

Nami: Woah, that’s a lot of catastrophizing. Are you okay man?  

 

Usopp: I’ve spent so much time screaming the pirates are coming, I’ve been involved in so many near death experiences, not exactly the strongest track record when it comes to dealing with danger coming out of nowhere.  

 

Luffy: I think you were really brave. That’s what a warrior does. Like Shanks, like Zeff.  

 

Usopp: Wow, thanks Luffy. I... I never thought of that. I mean, brave.  

 

Nami: Bravery means acting even when you’re scared.   

 

Usopp: But I hide so many times. I don’t really feel brave.  

 

Luffy: You’re brave when it counts. That’s when it matters.  

 

User: Wow, I never thought of it like that.  

 

Lucy: Uhh, yes, exactly, that fear is not just for the people of Shady Sands but your own people. There’s no future here if you don’t try and venture out more.  

 

User: I don’t know Goosey, Cold Fusion is pretty futuristic.  

 

Hatsume: ...cold fusion. Did he say cold fusion?  

 

Baxter: He... did, but surely he must be mistaken. Cold Fusion is merely theory, not a proven scientific principle.  

 

User: I’ll have you know our field commander is leading the charge in the field of, no, no, stop it Ben, operational security is a must.  

 

Mei: Bit late since you were broadcasted over the multiverse saying that.  

 

User: Dang, dang, dang and blast it. I guess there isn’t any point in hiding it I guess. Yes, we have the means of getting cold fusion off the ground. Our field commander has been working tirelessly since Shady Sands to recover her technology. And then she got a contact in the Enclave to flip on them. Crazy!  

 

Lucy: Enclave? Nevermind, so she has the tech? Where is she?   

 

User: At the observatory. Remnants of NCR military are holed up there. Well, some of them are. Ungrateful louts, lounging around waiting for payday and jumping ship whenit doesn’t come. At least the NCR folks here actually work for a living. Those other guys are out there setting up a military dictatorship.  

 

Izuku: Oh, you mean those ones who attacked Lucy?  

 

User: You were lucky to escape them when you did. They are tenacious in all the wrong ways.  

 

Lucy: But the research?  

 

User: Oh right, yeah that’s lost in the wind. She came back saying her contact was supposed to leave a certain city a few weeks back and meet her right about now. He’s supposed to be carrying the research... was it in or on his person?  

 

Lucy: In his person? Wait, don’t tell me.  

 

Jinx: you are kidding me!  

 

Nami: Are you for real!?   

 

Usopp: Oh that’s nasty.  

 

Baxter: I feel like I’m lost, is anyone else?  

 

Mei: Man, I’m always lost with these weirdos.  

 

Luffy: I know, so weird. What are we talking about?  

 

Lucy: The head, sweety, we’re talking about the head.  

 

Luffy: Oh right, the one you cut off.  

 

Nami: ...  

 

Usopp: ...  

 

Jinx: ...  

 

Baxter: ...  

 

Lucy: Did you get brain damage before you ate that fruit or after and just never told them to stop hitting?  

 

User: I’m...not sure I heard that right, did he just say...?  

 

Lucy: Okay, allow me to explain.  

 

A sudden explosion sounded from deep in the base of Vault 4. The mugs on the overseer's side desk rattled, some even fell to the ground, revealing their mouldy interiors on shattering. Lucy stared around bewildered while Ben tapped away on his terminal, bringing up a live security feed of the atrium. It was pandemonium as people were being tossed aside and shot at. When the smoke cleared, a giant suit of power armour marched forward while a cowboy crouched behind firing round after round into the kneecaps of anyone who snuck up on them.  

“Oh fudge, I think Cooper and Titus got worried when I wasn’t coming back. Now they're storming the vault.”  

Ben was gobsmacked, unable to parse what he was looking at. He shook his head slightly as he pushed another set of keys and brought up a second video feed, one pointed at the secret entrance via the medical unit. This time an NCR posse with the sheriff at the head, loading up the hidden door with bundles of dynamite and with a length of rope they were going to use to abseil down.  

At the back of the posse, guarded by two men, was a Brotherhood scribe kneeling on the ground with a rifle tucked under his chin. Next to him, a dog was leashed and barking at the entrance to the vault. The sheriff looked into the camera and held up five fingers.  

‘Five minutes to calm down Cooper and Titus, convince Vault Four not to kick us out and tackle those bounty hunters. First things first.’ thought Lucy.

“Overseer, go back to the live feed of the atrium again please. Thank you. OK, yeah, see, I spot a problem that we didn’t know about and might have sent those two off the handle. Why are all these people naked and praising Moldaver like she was some sort of god with fire pits and an altar?” Lucy wanted to be more shocked, but she had become terrified beyond the capacity for rational thought.  

“She’s our field commander overseeing our Cold Fusion project. The Flame Mother is our honoured deity.”  

Nami: I think you might need a new deity! One preferably not capable of being held accountable in court.  

---

The Sheriff was not a happy man. Not only had those convicts ran out on their justice, but their promise also to deliver on Moldaver went unfulfilled since news indicated she was literally two miles away. They’d go after her but the chance to wrangle the mutants and undesirables of the modern NCR was too tempting to pass up.  

The red lights began to flash as Lucy came into view via an elevator. She exited the airlock with arms held high. The rifles were aimed at her kneecaps and the Sheriff stepped forward.  

“Now, what we have here, I believe, is a failure to communicate.”  

Lucy cast a wary eye around, the troopers spread out to flank her. She kept her hands up.   

“I understand that a certain time limit has been exceeded, am I correct?”  

“You got that right. Leniency has been revoked by the Governor of the NCR for failure to comply with commands.”  

Lucy bit her lip and thought for a moment, “I understand and accept responsibility. Therefore, in the event of this stand-off, can I offer a compromise that will not lead to casualties. I’m sure, you all have homes to return to and wouldn’t want to waste another moment on lowlifes like us.”  

They sneered at her, but the sheriff raised his hand and waived them off, “We’re prepared to listen.”  

“Great, I knew you were trustworthy men of the law. So, here’s my offer. I come with you as collateral, and you give Cooper and Titus two days to venture to Moldaver’s base.”  

“Just you as collateral?”  

“To be fair, I do offer biological functions necessary for survival. I also have insight into the minds of a great many Vault Dwellers who are ready and willing to enter the surface world.”  

“Really, you’d give up your own people? Just like that?”  

“All I ask, now that we’ve established, I am a high price commodity, is that Vault Four be left alone and your plans for repopulation of what I presume to be a brand-new Shady Sands can be carried out by viable reproductive individuals with open minds and a willing can-do attitude.”  

“And what’s to say these mutated folks in Vault Four won’t rise up and attack us, like this one here?” The Sheriff gestured to the bound scribe. He looked up and seemed to be a little green around the gills. Literally. His skin had adopted a shade of green akin to jaundice, and his uniform looked like it was one size too small.  

“Apologies sir, what is your name?” Lucy called out, drawing his attention from the assembly’s boots.  

“Thadeus. I’m with the Brotherhood of Steel. At least, I think I was. I don’t know what they’ll think of me being captured and all. I just got here because I passed out and they stole my package.”  

“That would be the head Thadeus. Officer, that head is the key to my colleague's victory. If I go with you and Thadeus, surely, we can reach an amicable outcome.” She hoped that her crossed fingers wouldn’t set off their trigger fingers. The Sheriff stared gruffly at her, frustrated and a little peeved she seemed to be making sense. He holstered his pistol and the rest of the posse, minus two, followed suit. Thadeus was lifted to his feet and pushed to the side. Lucy was gestured by one gunman to step forward. She did, one step forward and two to the right.  

“I should be out of the line of fire, don’t you think?”  

The posse stilled and that’s when Cooper and Titus unloaded a barrage of bullets into the legs of the gunmen. Thadeus dived to the floor with a yelp of terror. Lucy fell backwards and saw bullets whiz by overhead. With six of the seven gunmen were lying on the ground, that’s when Cooper used his shotgun revolver to blow a hole in the foot of the final one.  

Only Lucy, Thadeus and the Sheriff remained. Maximus trundled forward, still in the power armour and glared through the grill down at Thadeus. He had the decency to look a little ashamed of leaving his bully victim to die of thirst. Max finally relented, it seemed he had earned the hard stare of the Knight. He held out a hand and helped him up.  

Lucy was standing over the Sheriff who groaned in pain. He grimaced and put pressure on the wound, urging his companions to do the same. He gazed painfully at Lucy who looked a little shaken at the grizzly wounds but steadied herself and walked up to the downed men.   

‘How?’ he thought.  

---

Five minutes earlier  

“Cooper, if you can hear me, please stand down.” Lucy shouted into the PA microphone. Max was in the middle of throwing a man into the nearest Nuka Cola machine and Cooper was fanning his revolver to blow away as many undressed cultists as he could before reloading.   

“Lucy, can you hear us?” Titus shouted back, gently lowering the scared civilian, who scurried back to the group of partially dressed, soot covered worshippers. Birdie looked affronted at being interrupted.   

“Yeah, I can see and hear you! How is your power armour working without a fusion core, no, never mind, we’ve got enemies at the gate. I need you to take the vault entrance elevator to the top and loop round to the secret medical entrance.”  

The two paused and stared at one another, then back up into the air they shouted back, “what about your kidnappers?”  

“What kidnappers? You mean the cult?”  

“We resent being called a cult, we’re just a commune!” An indignant Birdie proclaimed.  

“That sounds like something a cultist would say.” Cooper said evenly. Birdie glared heartily at him. Titus turned his head away from the naked woman.  

“No, guys, I went willingly to investigate. We’ll discuss details later but I need you to loop round and catch these sheriff goons, the ones from before. Can you do that?”  

Titus was the first to lower his gun and sheepishly looked around at the carnage, “Sorry everyone, we thought she was kidnapped by the person we were sent to capture and you guys really look like a cult.”  

“It’s cool.”  

“We’re fine now.”  

“Are we really in a cult?”  

Lucy exhaled with deep frustration and stood straight before the Overseer. "Sir... Ben, I feel like we've bonded enough for me to call you that, to atone for my comrades heinous acts and prove our worth, we will handle this intruder before he causes danger to your citizens... causes more danger, I mean." Ben was stunned by the sudden quick turn of events and merely nodded impotently. She made her way to the lift with Ben guiding her, though he trailed behind her wide strides.

Birdie took charge of directing the injured to the medical ward while Cooper sauntered towards the Main lift. Titus remained still, looking forlornly at the injured assembly. Some looked on him in fear, others stared with withering hate.

“I should stay and help. I mean, I caused this.”  

“Well hey, don’t take all the credit, I got a few bullseye’s myself. But iffin you’re really feeling torn up ‘bout all this, maybe a little community service will get the glares off your back.”  

“Helping the people of Vault Four fend off an attack, think it will help.”  

“Hell no. I just haven’t shot anything in three days, and this shootout got me all riled up. Also  

take that damn suit off. We’re going stealth mode, and you need more lessons. There’s a reason squires don’t pilot them things.”  

Titus paused mid-exit and regarded Cooper evenly. Cooper didn’t blink. “How long?”  

“First moment I laid eyes on you. Be honest, I thought you were a new initiate with how naive you were but the way you pranced about in that like a ballet dancer who flunked outta dance college for not being the least bit graceful.”  

“Don’t tell Lucy, not yet, she should hear it from me.”  

“That’s all dandy, but I’m thinkin’ you better put that power core you got back into Jeeves before she finds out her favourite pet ran out of batteries.”  

“Are you just stalking me, how do you know all this?”  

“Cause you’re a fucking idiot and as predictable as a... know what, ain’t got time for folksy witticisms, nut up and shut up.”  

Titus pulled out the core and marched to his quarters where Jeeves was depowered. He knew Lucy would have to find out eventually. But the suit gave him far too much ego. And now it felt like he was back in basic training, no armour, no big guns, just a 10mm and a ghoul and a homicidal robot as back-up. ‘ Maybe I can find another way to help them.’ Max thought.  

---

Present   

“Now then Sheriff, we can negotiate a new deal. The denizens of Vault Four are willing and able to heal your wounds and send you on your way. All you must do is return that satchel of... pharmaceuticals to my friend here and pretend we never saw each other. If it helps, you may be allowed to post a bounty for us.”  

“Are you for real?” Cooper asked, looking at her bizarrely. Even Titus wasn’t sure what she was getting at, letting their names be associated with crime and having their heads hunted for caps.  

“What, hearing Luffy talk about it so much, I kinda want one now. Right now, we’re in a race to see who gets theirs first.” Lucy replied eagerly. Titus, his face of disbelief was hidden behind the helmet. Cooper however looked almost proud of her. “What say you detective, do we have a deal. I promised minimal casualties.”  

The Sheriff instead hawked up a globule of spit and lobed it at her boots. He reached for his pistol and whipped it out, quick as a snake. Cooper saw through that and shot the hand off his wrist.  

“Cooper! We said wounding only.”  

“Well, see now, that there is a problem. These fine folks of the NCR remnants are none too keen on having their power usurped, even if their lives are on the line. Have I got that right... Sheriff?”  

The Sheriff was too winded to even scream, too shocked to even register the pain. He sat there staring at his stump and at the spot where his gun and a lump of bony flesh sat slumped.  

“Lucy,” Titus interrupted, “Our mission is too important to leave to chance, not when so many people depend on their secrecy.” She wanted to appeal some more but...  

“Sorry Vaultie, looks like you ain’t getting your bounty poster anytime soon. Jeeves, serve our guests, would ya?” Lucy looked at the neutral floating Mr Handy and begged with her eyes that doesn’t do what she expected it to do.  

“Of course sir, just a little nip and tuck and we shall be home in time for tea.”  

“Wait, Jeeves!”  

With surgical precision, Jeeves swept through the downed men, buzz saw revving and slicing apart heads and throats. None had a chance to scream out in protest or pain, they were dead in a matter of seconds, “All done Mam, shall I fetch the Abraxol? If you have a mess, and need no fuss, just use Abraxol to clean it all up. Perfect for dissolving communists.”  

Lucy looked aghast at the carnage around her. Blood was starting to accumulate and congeal from so many open wounds. Soon she would be stepping in it, and she didn’t feel any illness like she would have before.  

“Yes, Jeeves, please start cleaning protocol. Umm...” Titus tried to look around to inspire some sort of trigger word, he was more focused on how detached Lucy was looking.  

Cooper sighed and stepped through the bodies to retrieve his drugs satchel, “Jeeves, clean up on aisle one, multiple broken jars of tomato aspic need clearing. Pharmaceuticals, really!? Just call ‘em drugs girl.”  

---

Meanwhile, at UA  

Private DM: Administrator  

Izuku: Mr K, sir, how do I put this? Can we see the coded software behind the chat room?  

 

K: oh, no, you can’t.  

 

Izuku: But you helped us before.  

 

K: Yes, and that was just to reorient the experiment back on track. Did you know that so far, of all these experiments, you are the only group to nearly fall apart because of internal strife and not because your universes villains have conspired together or have been influenced by the butterfly effect to try much harder much earlier.  

 

Izuku: No, but surely assisting us in this will help further the experiment. Think about it, all of us meeting face to face, sharing resources. We could even think about transferring over people from other worlds, to give them a proper home, treatment, food!  

 

K: You are certainly a hero through and through. Most would consider the financial benefits of moving between worlds but consistently, whenever you’re involved, the motives of everyone around you seem to skew towards pure altruism.  

 

Izuku: So why not? Even Crymini got the same idea.  

 

K: Because the experiment is the laissez-faire, incubator, ant farm type of experiment. I don’t get involved and just facilitate your development. And soon, Lucy will need to make a leap.  

 

Izuku: What do you mean?  

 

K: Lucy is going to have to endure a lot of change, I won’t say how, I won’t put that burden on you. But I can’t get involved, especially not when she can change for the better, into something stronger, much earlier than in her original timeline.  

 

Izuku: Why Lucy in particular? Because it’s going to be suffering right. Everyone always tells me suffering leads to growth. But growth should be natural.  

 

K: Lucy’s universe is interesting because it’s the first point of deviation I analysed. Her universe was the one where I extracted my algorithm for multiversal communication and travel.    

 

Izuku: Lucy’s universe? You mean, something happened in her universe that caused it to merge with another.  

 

K: that’s what I said, yes. Man, you anime characters really need to stop doing that thing where you repeat back what was just said like it’s so damn mind blowing.  

 

Izuku: Huh?  

 

K: Nevertheless, you’ve shown that progress and evolution brilliantly. You used to not be able to speak another word and now you’re constructing arguments against inter dimensional beings and speaking to girls as if they won’t bite your head off.  

 

Izuku: Well, I, I, I, I…  

 

K: Until I remind you, that is. Fact is, this is a learning opportunity for your community, I won’t always be there to give you answers. Better to get you started on your independence before you really get into the nitty gritty.  

 

Izuku: So that’s it, no info, no advice?  

 

K: I’ll tell you this, punching a hole in the universe takes a lot of power. Perhaps starting off slow can lead to other alternatives. The universe doesn’t like to mix its peas with its porridge. A duo of scientist taught me that in their works about the Barriers to Trans-Dimensional Travel.  

 

Izuku: Anything else, please?  

 

K: Tell you what. The book is a bit outdated, Y’know, for a being who can actually traverse the multiverse. Maybe you can pass it on to you associates. Some of the terminology and physics concepts are of their time but Baxter will definitely be able to thread familiar territory.  

 

File Sent: Barriers to Trans-Dimensional Travel.pdf  

 

Izuku: And the anomaly, how does that play into this?  

 

K: I might recommend Lucy and her band look into Mojave. A research base there might be the source.  

  Chat disconnected  

  Izuku stared at his phone in disbelief. Out of service range apparently meant cut off from the multiverse itself. Or at least, it’s less powerful. They were closing in on the USJ and their experience would begin soon.  

 

 

Notes:

Man, of all the shows to start part way through this fic, I had to start Dr Stone NOW! Not only is it one of the most fun, endearing, and educational animes I've seen recently but man it would have been so cool to see Senku analyse the Fallout World and work out how Devil Fruits work. Far too late to join a new fandom in and overcrowding it like crazy. But, live and learn.

Also, maybe I should designate some time to play Disco Elysium and finish P5 Royal after I complete a chapter instead of letting it drag between uploads.

Chapter 21: Where's the music coming from?

Summary:

Quickly catching up before the USJ, a bunch of the dads linked to our multiversal chat are influenced by the magic that inhabits Hell.

Notes:

A quick update to apologise for the lengthy gaps between updates. I took a sabbatical after my recent job finished for the summer. Got some writing done. Finally getting my money's worth from my Steam Library. Got a chance to visit a Con and meet some fun people.

And One Piece Day happened. Did you see the trailer for Live Action Season 2, I'm EXCITED!? Who will complete their story first, me or Netflix?

Chapter 21  

UA High, Staff Room, Two Hours Earlier  

Izuku was pondering over the chat and what it would mean if they could not just communicate but interact with each other. The device would need to be finished first, trial runs first, hopefully Pentious or Ekko would talk some sense into Mei and Jinx before they immediately started on human trials. And Charlie was right, the means of spreading resources between their worlds would help each of them tenfold. Fresh drinking water and medicine to cure radiation sickness for Lucy’s universe, a weird name but easier to qualify than the code of text that showed up in the algorithm. For Charlie, they could provide new reading material to help the sinners redemption.  

‘I wonder if they would have a faster turnaround if Mr. Aizawa oversaw their rehabilitation?’ Izuku considered. At any case, there were so many ideas to consider, his first thought was to consult his hero on the best way to help so many people. During lunch, he was waiting outside the Staff Room to see if All Might was available. When the door slid open, his enthusiasm didn’t diminish a smidge at the sight of Snipe, the long-range hero. Almost instinctively, he produced his hero notebook from out of thin air with a pen at the ready. Snipe cocked his head to the side in bemusement and decided he would indulge a bit of hero worship.  

“So, partner, what brings you to our neck of the woods? Wouldn’t happen to be All Might, would it?” Midoriya tried schooling his shock at being discovered easily by smiling, which only came off as wobbly and strained. “Eh, we don’t mind, just keep it short though, y’all got special training this afternoon and you need Rush’s nutrition to keep up your strength.”  

“Thanks, Mr. Snipe. I have to ask, how do you keep up that accent while speaking Japanese and use those American euphemisms?”  

“Born and bred in the US of A. Had a Japanese mom, decided to move here when home didn’t feel like home anymore.”  

“Oh, I’m sorry sir.”  

“Ain’t nothing to be sorry ‘bout, that’s just how it is. Now get a roll on, he’ll be waitin’ for ya in the meditation lounge.” Snipe waved him on and sidled past to his 3-A classroom. Being a veteran hero teacher, Izuku imagined he would have a fountain of knowledge that would help the rest of his classmates. Momo seemed to prioritize weapon production, perhaps she could benefit from Snipe’s marksmen tutelage.   

‘ Then again, using black whip comes with its own caveats. Maybe I can convince him to give me some pointers. Cait’s been good but it always pays to have hands-on, in-person instruction. Maybe Cait and him could converse. Another thing to ask All Might, er, Toshinori.”  

---

Inside the meditation room, Toshinori was meditating on his power levels and trying to tap into the tempest that was One for All. Ever since Izuku manifested his quirk that clearly wasn’t All Mights quirk, Toshinori was of two minds. On one hand, it meant nobody was linking their power sets together but on the other hand, it meant he was drawing a blank when it came to instructing Izuku on how to use his quirk. He wasn't sure even Gran or Mirai could help but never say never he supposed.

Izuku came in, sat opposite, face full of smiles, and Toshinori was overwhelmed by despair at how optimistic his pupil was and yet he had no clues on how to help him.   

But he was a teacher, a professional, he needed to communicate rationally.  

“Hey All Mi- I mean, Toshinori, how are you today?” Izuku beamed.  

“Dash it all, I have no idea what I’m doing Young Midoriya! I’m failing you and it’s all my fault!”  

“What the fudge! All Might, where is this coming from?”  

“Sorry, sorry, I’ve been stressed as all get out trying to figure out your quirk. And when I’m stressed, I do what I do best, fight crime. So, what do I go and do, I waste all my energy for the day chasing purse snatchers and now I can’t even teach you in your first rescue operation training.” Toshi slumped and cradled his face in his hands. Izuku wasn’t sure what to say, normally he was the one to spiral and Toshi would snap him out of it. Then he recalled what Charlie said, ‘Sometimes what people need is an outlet for their frustrations and sometimes they need tangible advice. Others will need a distraction. It’s not always healthy but if you can pull them out of a spiral by distracting them with a related yet different task they can come out of their slump faster.’ It was worth a shot.  

“Say, All Might, erm, Toshinori, I was thinking about how I can help more people. We’re working on the link between our worlds in the chat. We’re calling it a mystery box, I thought it fit the whole aesthetic with the Schrödinger box and the mysterious nature of-”  

“A mystery box huh? Are you thinking about linking in with the rest of the gang?” All Might was pulled out of his funk, now keen to discuss this frankly incredible discovery.  

“Yeah, we’re thinking about sharing resources, not just supplies but teaching materials, accommodation maybe even quirks. The Pros could use their quirks and completely overhaul Lucy’s world in a few weeks. Not the whole world, but they could make a dent.”  

Toshi stroked his chin, mulling over this idea. ‘It’s sound in principle, however, after this morning, I need to set an example.’ He sat up and gave Izuku his full attention. “Midoriya, I think it’s telling that you saw your friends struggle as an opportunity to help. You’re taking my lessons about community service to heart. I’d say, if you were to do this, you’d receive no commendations or recognition. But I know you’d be content to know your allies are bettered in the long run. That’s why I’m telling you it’s not what you should be focusing on now.”  

Izuku paused and was concerned by what he said, “But All Might...”  

“I get it, a hero's duty is meddling where we don’t belong, but I meant that in a more emotional, societal capacity. People will ask us to not interfere, to stand by and wait. But that is when you must act. However, you can’t act in every scenario. Even in our world, interfering in other countries where our authority ends can lead to dire consequences.”  

“But that’s just the HPSC and the WHA. They implement the standards for our worlds, not others.”  

“Try to see it as a case study. It’s not just an ethical issue but a pragmatic one. You’re already stretched thin, heck, I’m stretched thin, dealing with this world's problems, don’t add on an entire new world, let alone four worlds of new problems.”  

“But if I have the opportunity, then I should take advantage of it whenever I can. I remember watching you not care about the pecking order of heroics because helping people was a priority. When you leapt from one side of Japan to the other, just so you could lend your power to a bunch of pros even when they claimed they had the situation handled.”  

“And wisdom I have honed over many years will tell me when to not stretch my limits. Take it from me, use now to cultivate your skillset and gain experience, don’t rush headlong into this without considering your personal mental health.”  

Izuku pouted at being talked down from this idea. It finally felt like an idea he was pitching All Might, not like something he was catching up to. And the opportunity is so close. He could at least get him to think about it.  

“Sir, what if we use this as an opportunity to learn. To gain experience by helping others in worlds that won’t impact us in the long term.”  

“See, I get what you’re saying," he paused to let his words sink in, “but this is still another world, not just your training ground, people’s lives will be affected when you leave.”  

Izuku nodded quickly and expressively, “I understand All Might, just please, consider this option. It feels like an opportunity we can’t afford to miss.”  

Toshinori smiled and ducked his head to hide it, “Alright fanboy, I’ll consider it. I’m glad you can come to me with these developments and trust me with your secret just as I trusted you with mine. Get going and make sure you focus, Aizawa can be effective on teching you how to wield Black Whip considering his skill set. But he can also be super pissed if you’re late. And since when did you start calling me All Might again? It’s Toshinori, I trust you.”  

Finished, Izuku left and shut the door behind him, determined to prove his efficiency and hopeful that All Mi-Toshinori would courier his idea to Nezu. It felt important for him to inspire an idea for UA. No sooner had he disappeared, the chat-app opened, reading about the recent happenings at Baratie, and did the door swing open again. Yagi Toshinori was met by the gas masked visage of Snipe, who returned back to the staff room for a copy of his teaching plan.   

“Got to hand it to the youngin’, ever since Nezu came forward to us about this here multiversal thing, I’ve been considering the options of venturing cross borders and giving my class a proper learning opportunity.”  

“I get it, truly I do. I just can’t load more onto his plate, what with him already swamped with the responsibilities of a student." Toshinori replied, cradling his head, "I just wish I could take some of that pressure off him and give in to this hairbrained scheme. Most schools would pay a high price for the opportunity to rehearse for the Provisional exam, here we have the option for free on a silver platter.” He pulled out his phone and spotted the photo of the now muscular but clearly tired Izuku smiling through the pain after his mass clean up of the beach. On his home screen, a little symbol emerged. The same one that emerged on Izuku's phone not three weeks earlier.

“Seems like a no brainer to me. Maybe I just don’t know enough about it to help. Don’t come to me with the dos and do-nots of multiversal whatchamacallit. I’d probably strand my class in another dimension. Oop, speaking of...” He reached for his desk, plucking the contents off and spun on his heel. He tipped his hat and left.

“Ah, yes, good luck. I’ll stay here and meditate on my mistakes as Nezu has directed.” the intercom crackled slightly as the telltale giggle of the school's manic mammalian principal sounded off. Midnight entered soon, carrying a confiscated radio from one of the students and left it on the desk nearest Toshinori. She winked and passed to her desk.  

Alone in his office, Toshinori sat back and thought of Izuku's progress and his stress. The chat certainly shouldered some of that burden but perhaps he should also. He’d watch him closer, his young apprentice as he climbed that mountain he built for him. He’ll be there, watching him.  

Unnoticed to everyone, a jaunty tune started playing from the radio, the rock guitar riff playing a melancholy melody that spurred Toshinori to start singing. The tune got louder and louder, Midnight unconsciously humming to the tune.

 

Every breath you take  

And every move you make  

Every bond you make  

Every step you take  

I'll be watching you  

 

Every single day  

And every word you say  

Every play you spin

Every fight you win  

I'll be watching you  

 

Meanwhile in Moldavers headquarters, Hank MacLane sat in his cage mulling over his daughter’s lot in life. Especially when she so close to becoming the perfect micromanager. And then he heard the music.  

 

Oh, can't you see  

You belong to me?  

How my poor heart aches  

With every step you take?  

 

In a castle in Hell, Lucifer sat amongst his ducks, watching the news of reporters outside the hotel, in his hand he stared at the picture of Charlie and Lilith with him when they were happy.  

 

Every deal you make  

And every vow I break  

Every smile you paste, all the fame you sake  

I'll be watching you  

 

Jinx stood above her void and stared at the disassembled Fishbones on her workbench. Then she spotted the piece of plaster spray painted by Ekko with her and Vi’s face as kids, one she pulled from the wall and mounted on her desk. Her record player sprang to life next to the hexpad.  

 

Since you've gone, I've been lost without a trace  

I dream at night, I can only see your face  

I look around, but it's you I can't replace  

I feel so cold, and I long for your embrace  

I keep crying, Violet, Violet please  

 

Uraraka and Cait leaned back against a wall in their respective universes and began to sing out to the music emerging from their chat apps. Both stared at their partners, a bundle of nerves as they were heading off to their next battle. Izuku to prove his mettle as a rescue hero and Vi to stand her ground as the voice of the Lanes in front of the council.  

 

Oh, can't you see  

You belong to me?  

How my poor heart aches  

With every step you take?  

 

Through the chat, the sounds of the girls of 1-A harmonizing to their melody could be heard.  

 

Uraraka: Every move you make  

Cait: And every vow you break  

Uraraka: Every smile you fake  

Cait: Every claim you stake  

 

I'll be watching you  

 

On their own, through the multiverse, across planes of reality, the fathers harmonized the final verse.  

 

“Every move you make” sang Hank.  

“Every Step you take” sang Toshinori.  

“I’ll be watching you...” sang Lucifer.  

 

Midnight poked her head into Toshinori’s office, poking her finger in her ears to clear them out.  

“Yo All Might. You playing music? Mind turning it down?”  

“I’m not playing music, I don’t think.” Said All Might.  

 

---

 

Baratie, East Blue  

Sanji situated himself back on the line, preparing mise-en-plus for the dinner service. It seems word had spread among the visiting patrons of the recent clash between a pirate crew and a warlord. Zeff, who had given up on reprimanding Sanji’s presence, remarked how such a story would eventually draw the attention of the marines, especially if the Straw hats were still hanging around. It seemed Luffy wanted to play it both ways, being a pirate with a crew and chore boy cleaning dishes. He honestly considered that if the crew left, he would stay and wash dishes for the next year out of obligation.   

If he didn’t add another year of service to pay back the broken dishes.  

“Well, that should do for today. Get Carne and Patty in here, kick their arses if they don’t shift and get started on their entree’s.” said Zeff, hobbling over to the stove top and prepping morning congee for the staff. Gin, of all people, was first to arrive, already hoisting huge fish cadavers and loins, which he pulverized with ruthless efficient use of two meat tenderizers.  

“I can handle it. Don’t need them coming down here to ruin these beautiful striploin cuts.” Sanji replied, sharpening his knives to razor sharpness. Zeff rounded on him.  

“I didn’t ask you to do it, your cooking's no good here. Get my actual chefs and get going.”  

“Get going where Zeff? This place would fall apart without me.”  

“We’d serve more women with less complaints without you. Make yourself the Chore Boys problem and set sail.”  

“You trying to get rid of me old man. Fat chance of that.”  

“Very good chance if you ask me.”  

“Tell you what, I’ll leave here the same day Chore Boy finishes those plates, how ‘bout that you shitty geezer.” Sanji retorted, getting a slap in the face from Zeff's dry cloth. He pivoted and drove a foot to his side, but Zeff caught it and drove his peg leg into Sanji’s foot, pinning him down and tossing him off balance.  

Gin decided to make himself scarce, familiar with Kriegs brand of punishment when it came to insubordination. Zeff and Sanji panted with simmering anger that mellowed out into frustrated gasps. They turned back to their stations and returned to their spread as if nothing had happened.  

“Do you think Chore Boy and his crew are actually talking to people from other worlds? The way they talk, those blokes on the snail, like they’ve never heard of the marines or even swam in the ocean before.” Sanji wanted to say it offhandedly, but the allure of such an absurd notion was too enticing for him not to be keen. Zeff looked at him out the corner of his eyes and smirked.  

“I wouldn’t rule it out. The seas are not to be trifled with. When you’ve travelled like I did, Paradise was something out of stories. I saw incredible feats performed by men who had no devil fruit ability in them and islands that could bend the laws of physics on a whim. All those names you heard, Roger, Whitebeard, Kaido, Fisher Tiger, they did things no man ever considered p[ossible just because they believed they could.”  

“You ever travel to another world then?” Sanji smiled at him, teasingly, Zeff scoffed and lightly whipped his arm with the dry cloth.  

“Not me anyways. Think I heard some folks disappearing out there. Not just sank but no trace found.” with that, he decided to move off towards the ovens and preheat them for the roasts, “Get Carne and Patty, wake the rest.”  

He was about to when suddenly Luffy was tossed through the front entrance. His rubber body cushioned the impact and thankfully didn’t hurt him but scattered glass and wood chips over the tables. Sanji, Zeff and Gin rushed to the foyer where Luffy was pulling himself up off a collapsed table.  

“Oi, oi, Chore Boy, what’s happening here?”  

“I think Arlong wants a fight and he brought his crew.” On the balcony overlooking the seating area, mocking laughter and a slow clap echoed ahead of a vicious looking fishman with a saw nose.   

“So, this is the famous Straw Hat Luffy. I must admit, the stories I heard about you got me a little excited. Maybe a little too excited because you’re not exactly living up to the legend.” Arlong vaulted the balcony and dropped to the ground before the four humans. In his hands he held something big and floppy. Luffy was ready to square up when Zeff strode in front of him.  

“So, you’re this Arlong bloke I’ve been hearin about. In case you haven’t noticed, this is a place of business and unless you’ve made a reservation, I’ll be asking you to leave.  We serve all types here.”  

Arlong sneeered and began to pace back and forth. It was then they noticed that Arlong had the Maitre’d in his grasp by the neck. “All types. I suppose you’ll make an exception for me, being a violent fishman. Otherwise, you’d have me serve humans like this one here.” He clenched harder and the Maitre’d gasped. Luffy looked incensed and was ready to throw a punch.  

“He’s one of my best workers and this place wouldn’t function without him.”   Arlong released his grip and dropped the coughing fishman, he crawled towards their group where Sanji and Gin helped him to his feet to sit aside.  

“How about this then. Me and my crew sit down and enjoy fine meal, you hand over the Straw Hat, and then we won’t tear this place apart.” Luffy cracked his neck and knuckles, a smirk growing on his face at the prospect of fighting Nami's tormentor. A part of him really wanted to run for the door, find Nami and bring her back so the two of them could take him down together. But the mood was growing tenser.

Sanji stepped up to Arlong next, furious at Arlong’s gall. “You won’t be hurting anyone at this place, not Zeff’s dream and not chore boy.” He sprinted, jumped off a table and spun into a kick. The weight of his foot struck hard against Arlong’s neck but ultimately didn’t move him an inch. Sanji, caught off guard, stared shocked at Arlong’s poise. In fact, Arlong didn’t even push him off, Sanji just retreated back a step while Arlong raised his fingers to his lips and whistled for his subordinates. At the entrance, five more fishmen stepped in, each jumping from the overlook and landing on their feet by their captain. They cackled in glee and brandished cutlasses.  

Zeff stamped his peg leg and from behind him rushed in the remaining line cooks. They stood ready to fend the restaurant with pistols in one hand and oversized cutlery in the other. Some had enormous forks, others enormous knives and a few held enormous spoons. Luffy looked around at this and smiled, a fight alongside cooks against an army of Fishmen. ‘ I don’t think even Izuku is having as much fun as I am.’  

Notes:

So this is my way of integrating the spontaneous musicals of Hazbin Hotel into the fic. It was honestly feeling only half represented without the showtunes. And this is Hell magic, something that seems to work through the radio, suddenly the concept of being able to speak to Hell directly might raise some alarm bells.

Basically, I can't write songs, I don't have the ear for it like other writers do. So I will state clearly here, even though I make no money off of this,

I do not own 'Every Breath You Take', all rights belong to Sting, writing credits and ownership. All rights reserved Universal Music Group.
Please alert me if this is a breach of copyright and I will remove the lyrics, rather than reporting the fic and having it be deleted.

But do tell me if this format works or not. I want to try it with a preset playlist of appropriate songs. I was inspired to use this because of the cover used in Lucifer for its musical episode, when Lucifer sang Every Breath You Take to express his feelings about his dad (God). Take a listen, Tom Ellis is seriously good.

Chapter 22: Battle for their lives part 1

Summary:

Our characters first major conflict will define who they are going ot be when facing the big bad threats of their universe. How is this chat going to screw it up.

Chapter 22

 

Lucy, California Wasteland

They had finally begun their trek into the desert. Again. They were only in Vault Four for three days but it felt like weeks. Maximus and Thadeus had remained behind with the Vault four scientists to finish off the Mystery Box. Schematics were provided, courtesy of Baxter, Mei and Jinx, on Maximus’ own Pipboy. She had to keep reminding herself to say the name, to get used to his face with that name. Maximus. Maximus. Maximus. She had been remarkably calm when he told her the truth.

One Hour Earlier

Maximus looked like a brow-beaten Labrador staring at his paws like he was being scolded for getting into the trash. The imagery reminded her of that dog that travelled with Lipzig and Cooper; she wondered what became of it.
“Titu-erm, Maximus, please look at me.” She said gently. He looked so defeated, his eyes were near crying. Thadeus was nearby, one black eye healing quickly after Maximus decked him for telling Lucy his real name just as he was about to. He gave him a gut punch for old times' sake for leaving him abandoned in the Power Armour.
“Lucy, I am so sorry for not telling you sooner. I didn’t even have the armour any more and I still kept calling myself Titus, like I was some hero.”

“Yeah, you may not know this, but a lot of the squires kind of thought he was an ass, so there wasn’t any love lost when you were chosen to succeed Squire Dane. By the way, were you the one who put blades in-”

“Shut up, Thadeus! Again, sorry, I just wanted to believe, maybe even fake it till I make it, believe long enough, and I’d become a Knight.” He was beating himself up more than he needed to.

Lucy smiled and cupped the side of his face, “Hey, if anyone knows about faking it till they make it, it’s me. Who am I to judge how people survive the wasteland? In my time up here, I’ve only been able to survive thanks to sheer brutality. I still feel like I’m faking the part of myself that wants to go back to the vault. Listen to me, I’m calling it the Vault, not Vault 32.”

“Lie by omission is still a lie. I’m sorry I broke your trust and for dragging you into my mess.”

“Hey, listen, I forgive you. You hear me. What does Charlie say? It starts with sorry. So I hear you and believe me, you didn’t pull me into any more messes that I wasn’t already part of.”

Thadeus seemed not to get the message as he piped in once more, “Actually, the Brotherhood is a little pissed that they haven’t gotten any feedback or mission updates. Radio Silence from either of us means the mission has moved from reconnaissance to infantry.”

Lucy paused, leaning around Max to give a questioning glance, “Meaning?”

“They’re going to come in force in the last location they found us, then fan out from there towards their target, Moldaver.”

“Wait, you’re after Moldaver. Seriously, why are so many people after someone who steals dads? Did you know about this part, Ti-Maximus?”

“Just call me Max. No, I knew of the target, but nothing about who he was delivering to. Thadeus, anything about that?” he turned to Thadeus, who shrank away, so Max held out his arms in peace.

“The information is spread out amongst the squads. No one has all the info, so no one can compromise the mission. One squad was looking for Moldaver, one was looking for the target, and another was looking for the source from which the target came. The Enclave have been our major opposition for years and this device will give us an edge over them if we find them both.”

It was a lot to take in. She’d need some time to ruminate on all this.

Present time

Now that she’d ruminated on it, she was feeling a little pissed that so much of the information she needed was within her grasp. Thankfully, Thadeus had provided a scanner she used to amplify her pip-boy beacon. They were following the trail to the delivery point of this head. It seemed that Thadeus managed to dip it in some preservative tar; at least it stopped smelling so awful. Thankfully, just up ahead would be a gas station, perfect for a pitstop, though she doubted anyone would service them. Cooper took point, sniping any additional critters that roamed across their path, looking for easy prey. She had a canteen filled with water and spitefully drank it in front of Cooper from a large canteen.

“Don’t waste water, Miss McClane. And yes, before you say anything, do as I say, not as I do.” He dismissed as he reached for his canteen, gulping down what was honestly the freshest water he’d drunk in years. Turns out drinking that irradiated shit played hell with his gut. Even as a ghoul, it gave him the runs something awful. “Pick yer feet up, we got another couple hours of walkin’ to go before you see yer pops again.”

Lucy picked up her pace and moved briskly. She was especially grateful she was able to get a new set of clothes and a new Vault suit with an emblazoned 4 on the back. Birdie was surprisingly nice when she wasn’t cryptically asking her questions or covering herself in blood.
Finally, they arrived at a Red Rocket gas station amidst the dead foliage. An old banger of a car was sitting dead in front of it. They sat on its hood and rested their feet. To pass some time, she set her pip-boy receiver to a radio station. Fiddle music would have to do for now. The chat hadn’t alerted her to any new changes. Hopefully, Izuku would make some progress in the teleportation circuit.

Whimpering and scratches.

Someone somewhere was whimpering and scratching to get out. She looked around, checking under the hood of the broken-down jalopy. Cooper targeted the broken-down cooler sitting out front. He lifted the lid and out sprang the slobbering, barking canine. It pawed at Cooper's coat, and he let out a startled laugh at being caught off guard. Lucy wandered over and tickled its ear, then its chin. It turned playful eyes to Lucy and licked her fingers. Then it smelled the head in the sack and stopped. It sniffed and began to whine. It climbed out of the cooler, sat by Lucy and let out a mournful howl for its lost master. Cooper reached down to nuzzle its head and stroke the fur.

“There there, Dogmeat, you ain’t gotta worry bout the old man no more. He’s in a better place. And we're gonna give him a proper burial.” He whispered into its ear. Dogmeat, newly christened, tilted its head and gave a small bark.

Lucy nodded and turned to march off, “Let's head out. We got a dad to save and a vault to build up.”

She took point, tranq gun at the ready and head held high. She could smell Moldaver already, the former Griffith Observatory sitting on the horizon.

---

UA Campus, USJ, Morning

Izuku was not having a good morning. It started OK All Might seemed to be open to talking to him, Tsuyu made conversation, and he found it easier to talk about his quirk, having practised in the chat. Thirteen’s arrival tickled Uraraka pink with delight as she witnessed her number one hero give a detailed lecture on the breakdown of search and rescue. When under pressure, one must be patient, consider the safety of the victims compared to the environmental dangers. Only get into the situation if you were equipped or accompanied by someone who was. Don’t be a hindrance, and always be on the lookout for straggler villains and looters. He was committing this all to his notebook, Uraraka using her phone to type out the bullet points at lightning speed. Iida was nodding attentively, silently agreeing with everything Thirteen had to say while cross-referencing the information with his brother's instruction, fact-checking even though he would never have the gall to correct a pro hero. With all this information in mind, what should happen?

A bunch of villains attacked, the hero teachers tried to corral the classes into a safe zone, and Aizawa launches into the fray and begins to take down criminals from a distance. Thirteen guides the students of 1-A away from the fight to the exit, and Izuku reaches for his phone to use the chat and hopefully get All Might on the way. Then a mist-based villain halts them, declaring themselves to be the League of Villains and using their quirk to open up portals around them. So, of course, Bakugo wasn’t listening at all to the lecture, launches himself with both hands at the villain and declares himself the one to take down this new villain. Even though Thirteen had him dead to rights, trapped in a perpetual vacuum and contained, unable to help their handy master. Bakugo was now in the crosshairs, hand blasting away into the face of the villain, who groaned in pain and wilted under the continuous firepower. Izuku wanted to exert his authority as Class Vice-Rep, but the words stuck in his throat, the previous resolution about his former friend coming to a halt. Surely Bakugo had good instincts to throw himself into the fray like this, against the direct command of Pro-Heroes; he must have a plan.

Turns out he planned to hold the villain down and sporadically release pops of fire, growling into his ear to give up and surrender lest he risk being incinerated. This seemed to irk Todoroki, whose icy presence was making itself increasingly known. Uraraka was swearing like a sailor, demanding Bakugo step back and let Thirteen do her job. Just then, the portals that once waned emerged fully formed beneath the students’ feet.

“Fool, did you really think it would be that easy?” the villain Kurogiri declared, mini portals pulling Kirishima in and launching him at Bakugo like a torpedo into another portal, with Kaminari being caught in the crossfire.
“You damn villain, don’t you look down on me, don’t you dare dismiss me like-” Bakugo howled as he was launched into the portal.

“Dammit, Bakugo, we were almost OUT!” Uraraka’s voice cut off as a portal pulled in the rest of the class. Some managed to escape, others fell into one of the many training zones with two other classmates. Worse, the phone had slipped from his grasp. ‘I hope Uraraka can get the chance to call them.’

Now he was surrounded on a boat with two of his classmates and the rest of his friends scattered around the Unseen Simulation Joint. Tsuyu had pulled him from the water, her tongue working as a strong appendage while she stuck to the sides of the boat. Izuku lashed out with his black whip and snared their other classmate, Kyoka, avoiding her becoming shark bait for a few minutes more.

The water-based villains sneered from beneath, waiting for their next move.

“Hostages. They’ve taken us hostage and now they’re keeping us pinned down. Damn them!” Izuku slammed a fist on the guard rail in anger. Kyoka peered around, jacks at the ready, while Tsuyu crouched low, ready to kick off.

“They're not closing in. Are they just trying to freak us out?" Kyoka asked.

“Don’t see why, we’re at their mercy," Tsuyu pondered the circling enemies with cold detachment, “Maybe they’re waiting on something, like an order from their boss.”

“Must be,” Izuku said, “let’s see what information we have available to us. They’re not attacking, they’re keeping us pinned, they don’t want us going anywhere, they’re waiting but...”

“They also look impatient, like they really want to come out swinging," Kyoka agreed, seeing how they inched ever so slightly closer with every wash of a wave.

“Then we need to push them back. At least until we can work a way out. How?” Izuku settled into mutter mode, revising the information over and over until he could figure out their assets, “Dammit, should have brought the chat app, didn’t want it getting damaged, had to leave it in my locker, would have distracted me, not that it matters now.”

“Midoriya, stop muttering it’s freaking us out.” Tsuyu snapped at him, side-eyeing him with a wide vacant expression.

“Oh, I’m sorry, is my muttering getting in the way of your introspection-wow where did that come from, sorry Asui, that was totally uncalled for.” Both Tsuyu and Kyoka paused at his snap back, surprised that he would be snippy at a time like this, if at all.

“It’s okay, Midoriya, I get it, and please, call me Tsu.”

“Thanks, Tsu,” he replied, going back into mutter mode and rambling off a stream of ideas.

“Huh I guess he adapted quickly,” said Tsu.

“Yeah, guess that chat thing he’s on works. It would really come in handy to have that about now.” Kyoka replied, fishing out her phone and getting no signal to call emergency services, and returned to watching the waves. “Damn, if Momo were here, she would have come up with a plan pretty damn fast.” Izuku paused and turned to Kyoka, “I never got the chance to determine what her plan was for the Mock battle class. What did she do exactly, Kyoka?”

Caught off guard by his intensity, she stuttered a brief explanation, “Well, uh, she mostly played defensive against myself and Sparkplug. She analysed our quirks and determined the best response.”

“Best response! That’s it. The villains aren’t attacking since they don’t know our quirks and are trying to figure out how best to respond. Kyoka, run down your stats. You too, Tsu.”

Almost standing to attention, the two reported, respectively, “I can transmit my heartbeat through my jacks and send a pulse wave, while I can also surveil the area for small sounds, so I can hear pretty good.”

“I can do whatever a frog does, stick to walls, extend my tongue, hop long distances, camouflage a little bit and secrete mucus that acts like poison. Any of that helpful to you?”

“Yes, all of it.”

“Whoa, that’s fast!” Kyoka exclaimed as Izuku proceeded to break down everything they were going to do. Finally, they were set to go. Though Izuku was feeling pressed and a lot nervous, the lack of backup from the app made him start to second-guess his decisions, but then he recalled what Luffy would say, ‘No regrets, go for it, whole hog. Then eat that hog.’ Not sure if the Hog thing would call for him to eat the villains, but he would need to take initiative.

“OKAY, LET’S GO!” The rest of the water villains were unprepared for the students to suddenly start raving and decided to get closer. Close enough for Kyoka to swing her legs over the door and send out a blast of her heart wave to completely disorientate the underwater dwellers with a blast of sonar. Then Izuku launched two tendrils of black whip from off his wrists while standing at the stern, feet braced against the back wall. Tsu took the helm and decided to push the boat into full throttle. The boat was catapulted forward, right up onto the land. Every water villain that tried to swim in front was blasted back by a powerful pulse of her amplified heartbeat. Soon, they swam as fast as they could to the stern, ready to leap up and gnaw on Izuku, some even grabbing hold of the rudder and hull. One leapt from the water, gaping maw wide open, and was about to gnash his teeth around Izuku still pulling on the boat to fly forward against the swimmer's pull. Before he did, he caught a mouthful of toxic mucus. Tsu gagged at the sight and launched her tongue to pull Izuku out of danger. He strained and coiled his muscles even harder.

Ever since the training sessions, he has only truly had a grasp of the black whip, aided by some boxing techniques of Vi and the stretching techniques of Luffy. Now he needed to take a page from Usopp, with just a hint of Cait’s planning. He strained harder until the need, the desire for more strength snapped inside of him, and a surge of sudden strength circulated through his body. He felt his muscles fill with energy, enough to remind him of the entrance exam, when his entire body felt like it would explode with energy. He needed that control, like Vi and All Might said, breathing was his key.

“Kyoka, Tsu, keep those guys off me until we have enough energy.”

“You know this is crazy, don’t you, green? Tsu, you got this?” Tsuyu nodded back and was producing globules of mucus on her skin. She felt like passing out from dehydration. But Kyoka was there by her side to blast everyone back, listening in to where everyone was.

Izuku breathed deep. He blocked out the actions of his friends, trusting them to keep the goons at bay. He visualised Vi throwing her punch, Luffy throwing his, and All Might throwing his. They would step forward, square their shoulders, throw their entire body into the punch, punch right through and past the point of impact, but their feet would be steady as the punch finally landed and ended. Energy coursed through them and into their motions until they completed the task. Just like he needed to. He felt his legs bulge with energy, his arms reinforced to handle the strain, his feet planted firmly, his back straight. Then he squatted, with all that energy circulating throughout him, pushing off the boat. The black tendrils grew tight, straightening out until they strained like a rubber band. The wall buckled under his feet; he threatened to fall through. Then he called out, “NOW KYOKA!”

She stepped up, both speakers plugged in, and unleashed a seismic blast of sonic energy. The sound rippled through the water and echoed in their brains.

The strain was too much, and they released their hold to grab onto themselves, hoping to alleviate any sort of pain that came from the soundwave, Tsuyu threw more globules of paralyzing mucus into the collective gathering of villains, as the ship itself shot away over the water, then onto dried land, then it skipped along land, Izuku reached out with Black Whip, while Tsu latched around them all with her tongue to keep them secured to the flying boat. Kyoka blushed heartily at the contact and kept her head buried. The few stragglers still holding onto the boat when it flew off the mechanism holding it in place were also thrown off, landing in a pile of shrubbery or concrete.

The boat hurtled forward until its hull started screeching off the ground, metal on rock and concrete wearing down the surface. It was a loud battle cry that heralded their arrival as they flew into the plaza. Right in time to see the handyman pointing at the creature next to it to fend off a very irate All Might, backing up Aizawa, who was staring down the creature. Izuku tried to spy a reason for any of this, not aware of where the boat was flying towards. He spotted Uraraka sitting over a desiccated Thirteen, waving her phone at him and pointing down at All Might.

‘Uraraka must have used her phone to trigger some sort of alarm that got his attention... can’t argue the results.

---

Five minutes earlier

All Might was attempting to shake off that weird feeling of singing. He had never felt it before, especially considering his lungs had been completely wiped out after his last bout with AfO. He was surprised he hadn’t coughed up a lung singing that fantastic tenor. He decided to investigate, an idea springing to mind, but only a theory. Sure enough, right there on his phone screen was the app for the chat that Midoriya had shown him when all this started.

The screen pulsed red, showcasing ALERT over and over. He pressed the screen and came face to face with a holographic projection of Uraraka speaking animatedly with a woman wearing a blue jumpsuit, a woman with orange hair and wielding a bo staff, and a grey-skinned, moth-like woman carrying a spear on her shoulder.

“ALL MIGHT! We've got a problem. Villains have invaded the USJ.”

“I still feel bizarre hearing someone as young as you say villains. That’s like something you would hear in a 1940’s speakeasy.” Vaggie said, offscreen, he could hear someone say, “I know right?”

“I found this emergency beacon in the chat. I didn’t know how it would help if I could only talk to people in the chat.”

“Well, this is extremely lucky. No need to worry, Young Uraraka, I’ll be over there lickety split.”

At this, Nami raised an eyebrow, “Um, how, you look like Luffy’s interpretation of a person, I mean, you are literally a stickman.”

“Not gonna lie, you are vastly different compared to what Izuku was telling us. Then again, we’ve only heard about you and not actually seen you.” Lucy smiled apologetically.

Toshinori smiled and quickly expanded into his muscle All Might form. Even Uraraka was taken aback by the shape change. While she was made aware through the chat, seeing it in real time was vastly different.

“Never mind, that will work,” Vaggie responded. The chat suddenly beeped with the arrival of three new chat users.

Engineering Subgroup has logged into the main chat

Baxter, flanked by Goopty and Crymini, appeared with some slapdash wooden box with buzzing Tesla coils and vacuum tubes sticking out at odd angles. Maximus stepped up next to Lucy with smears on his face and a trigger on a wire. Usopp sidled up next to Nami with a hammer in his hand and nails in his mouth. Mei’s hair was standing on end as the room she was standing in was buzzing with static electricity. Power Loader was shielding his face from the sparks flying off the device.

“All Might, we’re done.” Power Loader reported.

“Then let’s test it out. We’ll send out some Stimpaks from our end. It sounds like some of your guys might need it.”

“We’ll send you some of our food and water,” replied Power Loader, “your diets must be atrocious.”

“Don’t suppose anyone has some spare swords, Zoro is down two of his,” Usopp asked.

Vaggie piped up suddenly, “We confiscated a couple of knives, I think one of them had a sword, I’ll send that over to you. Pentious shouldn’t need one for right now.”

Lucy was positively beaming now, looking around the group, “How bout that, it's going to be smooth sailing from here on out.”

Everyone else groaned in frustration and facepalmed

---

Baratie, East Blue

The fight was in full swing. Luffy bobbed and weaved around the chefs and other pirates, aiming straight for Arlong. The towering fishman swung an enormous sword without any trouble, the saw-tipped blade weighing as much as a newborn in his hands. Sanji repelled a sneak attack with a kick to the face, followed up by a roundhouse to the chest. Pattie and Carne were parrying swords with their oversized knives, firing point-blank into the pirates. Not enough to penetrate the skin, but it stung like a stick across the knuckles. Gin was the most surprising. He was standing on a table, surrounded by three pirates, double-wielding the enlarged spoons like tonfas, smacking down on heads and batting away fists. He played defence, then offence, flipping from one to the other with practised ease. And jumped and spun in the air, pile driving two pirates into the ground and landing in a kneeling pose.

When one tried to wallop him over the head, that pirate received an extended fist to the face that launched him across the room. Luffy smiled, kept running and reeling in his arm. Zeff hadn’t moved from his guard post in the kitchen. From the kitchen led to the bridge, where anyone could commandeer the Baratie as a vessel for themselves. Zeff duel-wielded pistols, firing into the eyes of any pirate who dared near him. When they were blinded, he spun on his peg leg and brought a heel down on the pirate's cheek. But they were tough. Hits that would incapacitate most men only dazed these fishmen for a few moments. They would get right back up swinging, too afraid to let down their captain and face his wrath.

Finally, Luffy swung a leg at Arlong, pouring the full strength of his body into the foot. Arlong caught it in one hand. He chuckled mirthlessly. Luffy tried pulling back, but was surprised to find himself locked in place. Suddenly, he was thrown over Arlong's shoulder and hurled towards the entrance. He flew through, landing on the platform outside. He righted himself immediately, firing a fist in the air to signal his crew still on the Merry. Arlong leapt up to the balcony, slowly marched forward and brought his giant blade down on Luffy’s torso. It was halted mid-swing as Zoro launched into the fray. However, the sheer weight coming down on his wounds made him buckle. He held the blade back, and Luffy didn’t move, even when the tip of one blade nicked his neck. So focused on the two, Arlong was blindsided by a pellet of pure pepper striking him in the eye. He may have adapted to salt water, but an irritant in the eye would have distracted any man.

“YEAH, NICE WORK USOPP!”

“DON’T TELL HIM MY NAME!”

Arlong swung blindly, sword skimming the air as Luffy backed up and Zoro rolled to a crouch. He grunted in pain and held his chest. While he was blind, Luffy launched one punch after another, punching Arlong back one step at a time. With enough distance, Luffy reached and grabbed Zoro, pulling him out of danger. He spotted Nami waving from the Merry, and he nodded and held up his hat. She vaulted over the side and sprinted at them. Soon, some remaining pirates joined Arlong, or at least, some were thrown from the door as Sanji kicked one ahead of him. One of the pirates tried tackling Zoro, who sliced at his wrist and ducked a well-placed lead star from Usopp. Stunned, the pirate was unable to defend himself from Zoro’s slash. The other pirate, recovering from Sanji’s kick, threw himself into the water. Two more joined him and began to lap the restaurant in record time. With built-up speed, they shot out of the water, flying into Zoro and Sanji like torpedoes. Luffy leapfrogged over the third and reared his fist back to hit Arlong. But he instead was crouched by the water and launched a torrent into his face. Instantly, the power left his body, and he flopped to the deck.

“Luffy, stand down.” Nami barked at him, her face stern and furious, her bo staff poised at his neck, “I told you not to fight Arlong and look where it got you. All you had to do,” she slipped out a tube that contained the map to the Grand Line, “Was give me this, and now I have it. Pleasure doing business Straw Hat. Shall we, Arlong?”

Arlong looked confused for a moment, too caught up in bloodlust to think clearly. He wiped the remaining pepper from his eye and spat out the teeth shattered by Luffy’s punches. Then, as the new teeth settled in, he smiled widely, reaching out to pet Nami on the shoulder for a job well done.

“Toss the clown, we don’t need him. And toss the Straw Hat, leave him for the sharks.” The remaining fishman pirate lurched up and punched Luffy off the platform with near psychic force. Luffy fell ass over end into the water, all the while, he smiled widely as Nami walked away, tapping the concealed snail piece in her ear.

 

Notes:

Just barely in time for the release of the Fallout Season 2 trailer. Man, it's been non-stop with these trailers; MHA final season, One Piece Season 2, Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss crossover, now this. I'm almost willing to bet that Riot will announce a spin-off for Arcane in the coming months.

Part 2 will come out in a few days. What I had written was too much for one chapter.
Thank you for the feedback. Looks like the musical sections have been well received. I'm going to try and push for more Arcane sections; that part of the chat has been woefully underrepresented in this story.

Chapter 23: Battle for their lives Part 2: Piltovers Whiniest

Summary:

The groups our ladies have to negotiate with really are a bunch of whiny tools sometimes. Makes you wonder how the diplomats we send to negotiate manage to deal with the stress.

Let's hope Vi and Charlie can handle being in the hot seat.

Notes:

100,000 words!
What a mile stone.
Maybe I'm writing too much.
Maybe I should dial back a bit. The text size is a little overwhelming. I have more words than the hobbit and that told a coherent narrative, while I'm barely finished part one of my story.

Chapter 23  

 

Vi would rather be fucking anywhere right about now than have to deal with the sneering looks and condescending dismissal of the Piltover council of elites. Ever since she was young, she dreamed of the inside of the gleaming tower, of a giant assembly of rich snobs drinking champagne and pointing at different parts of the map telling the Enforcers to “go be evil here”. She dreamed of the lavish setting; how would Vander fit in if he took a seat there representing the lanes and it would make her cackle every time in her sleep. Vander always asked what she dreamed about that made her laugh and though she never said, her giggling gave the show away. So she told him the rest of her dream of the council of Piltover, to burst in through the skylight, shards of glass raining around her, while she flew down and landed a flying kick into the nearest noble. And while they panicked, having never been in a fight before, she would systematically deliver a solid kick in the nuts and clams of every council member she saw.  

This was vastly less impressive. Here she was, standing in front of a table of seven, feeling like a beggar come before with hat in hand for alms. ‘ Now I know how Midi feels. When I talk to him again, definitely apologizing for making fun of the stutter... dammit, I’m apologizing now, what has that chat done to me!’  

She blinked in frustration, hoping to clear her head of nerves and speak clearly about the issues in the Lanes. Cait, she saw, had finished speaking privately with her mother. She was a stern woman, with all the refinery she assumed she’d find in this room. ‘ But damn, I can see how Cupcake became a snack! Horny thoughts later! Whoever came up with the imagine everyone in their underwear tactic clearly has never fucked another living thing!’  

Finally, her thoughts became clear. Caitlyn laid a hand on her shoulder and nodded slightly in solidarity.  

“Give them a moment to convene. Apparently, Jayce has been under a lot of stress to combat Silco and Jinx stealing his Hex Tech.”  

“But that’s okay now, right? We brought it back and Ekko can start a discussion with-”  

“Ekko is a known dissident with an already negative impression. And Jayce can’t discount the fact that Jinx has been in possession of the crystal for almost two weeks. In order for there to be a bridge to be built, you need to lay some foundations.”  

“ME!? The Hell do I got to do with this?” Vi tried to hide the sweat that started beading on her forehead and sent a pleading look to Ekko to please get off his high horse. Ekko, for the first time since the bridge, looked like Little Man and bashfully looked away. He was just as uncomfortable as she was right now. Rebellions in the field are one thing but diplomacy, neither of them had developed a taste for it.  

“You’re the safe middle ground, not quite a criminal and not quite a revolutionary. The average person who has a grievance with her government.”  

“So, I’m the sacrificial lamb to be tenderized before the two of you start debating the hard-hitting stuff.”  

“I’d rather you not think so little of yourself. You have a dog in this fight and you have a voice. What you told me, back in my room, about Jinx, let them hear that voice. They don’t want to hear complaints, they want solutions, be the voice and give them options.” Cait was standing in front of her now, looking deep into her eyes and was determined the whole time. How had she never noticed how tall she looked in that uniform. She almost missed her outfit blending in with the Lanes.  

“Right, options.”  

The council was content to discuss amongst themselves, making themselves look important before the riffraff who barged in demanding civil rights and individual liberties. ‘ I wonder if Lucy were her, if she’d call me a commie or something equally wild.’  

Then she realised, the chat. She didn’t need a pep talk, she needed cheats. They wanted to look important, sitting at their table and ignoring her and Ekko while they stood waiting for them. So, she unveiled the Hexpad and began typing away in mute mode. She didn’t want the council listening and if she poked her head a little to the left- yup, there was Jayce looking frustrated and lost. Somehow a Lane dweller, some punk from the underground, had obtained one of his and Viktor’s patents still on the design table and he really wanted the discussion to end so he could call some attention to it.  

“Cupcake, stall for me, will you?”  

“Wait, you wha...”  

“They’re still talking, they don’t care.” She wandered to the side, nodding to Ekko to also stall. He cocked an eye in confusion and took centre stage. Vi opened up the hexpad and whispered into it. Ekko knew what to do, playing up the role of dissatisfied dissident, pontificating loudly and getting their attention.  

With he council appropriately distracted, Vi tapped into the private chat with Charlie. She absolutely needed some advice on diplomacy, at least enough to gain some brownie points and get some back up for finding Jinx.  

---

Vi: Charlie, you on this thing, I need some legitimate advice real fast on how to talk people into doing what I want? No pressure.  

 

Alastor: Apologies, dear Charlie is occupied at the moment, perhaps I can help.  

 

Vi: ...umm... where is Charlie?  

 

Alastor: During my absence, Charlie dear has found herself at the center of a little controversy and now she’s doing her best to smooth over the cracks as they form.  

 

Vi: Anyone that can help her over...down there?  

 

Alastor: I certainly gave her my two cents but she seems to believe that building bridges and clarity is the way to go. I’m sure she’ll come to her senses soon enough.  

 

Vi: You don’t need to come off as so damn condescending dude. You’re butthurt she didn’t listen to you, no need to sugar coat it.  

 

Alastor: It’s no skin off my nose if she doesn’t want to use all her resources when she has them. I’m sure the rumours of her leading a tyrannical dictatorship will fall to the wayside by ignoring the Vee’s and pandering to the Heavenly emissaries.  

 

Vi: Woah, what? Is this anything to do with that rumour about her using the hotel as a front for sparking an army.  

 

Unknown: ARMY? Who’s fronting an army?  

 

Cait: Unrelated to the topic I’m sure councilman.  

 

Alastor: Oooh, you have company.  

 

Vi: Yeah and I need some of that negotiator skill that Charlie is bringing to the angels. So unless you have any alternatives, can you please put me onto her.  

 

Alastor: Charlie had the forethought to keep this device out of sight of the Heaven party. Chances are they would throw a fit if they knew she was consorting with the mortal realm.  

 

VI: Shit, I just whipped it out in front of the council here, did I screw up?  

 

Alastor: Hmm... no, I don’t think so. The difference is our side wants to keep this as secret as possible in this taboo world. Your world has no compunctions. Did it turn some heads?  

 

Vi: Er, yup, looks like one of them, Jayce I think, really wants to talk about this thing. The rest are getting their hackles raised the more I talk into this without them knowing.  

 

Alastor: It’s driving them nutty I presume.  

 

Vi: Aw man, like you wouldn’t believe. Gotta say, if this is what they feel like when they make people stand around waiting for them to finish secret meetings, then I would totally do this every time.  

 

Alastor: Power play is your strongest asset in this case. Whoever has the most information is the one who stays alive.  

 

Vi: I always found that knowing too much paints a target.  

 

Alastor: Good call my dear. Indeed. Keep your cards close to your chest and play the right hand at the right time. Just as poor Husker did. In the scenario where you want something, play up this knowledge. Reveal you know more than them about this niche topic but don’t act like you know their secrets.  

 

Vi: One way trip to a cell and then a bullet chaser to wash it down.  

 

Alastor: Precisely. Let them in on game, tell them the rules, and give them a chance to win the pot.  

 

Vi: They’re looking for answers to their problems. Could this thing be used?  

 

Alastor: What do they want exactly? Figure that out and we can adapt. Give them an answer, maybe this gizmo can give them some relief, and then set your terms. Change the rules so they have to keep up with you.  

 

Vi: I get it, throw them off balance. They’re money guys, nothing but greed. I’m guessing they want someone to pin the blame, and I need someone to give me back up and get my sister back. Silco. I can give them Silco. Can this thing track down people?  

 

Alastor: Hard to say. Let's say it does. Think you can get in touch with someone on the other side? Your darling sister for example.  

 

Vi: How does that help?  

 

Alastor: A little sleight of hand. Here's little lesson in trickery, let them think you can do something and they will fill in the gaps. Maybe, if Jinx tells you where they are, you can...  

 

Vi: I have a tracker straight to the heart of the enemy. Give me ten good men, as much hex tech shit as you can muster and I’ll hand deliver you Silco. All I get is...  

 

Alastor: The junkie offshoot of your major crime investigation that I can keep as a pet.  

 

Vi: Back the fuck off shock jock. She may be unstable but she’s my sister. The longer she stays with him, the more screwed up she gets. No wait, not screwed- I meant to say, shit what does Charlie say?  

 

Alastor: Emotionally disturbed?  

 

Vi: Yeah...  

 

Alastor: Well, I believe that will serve you well.  

 

Vi: Sure. I got this. By the way?  

 

Alastor: Hmm?  

 

Vi: What were you doing since the last time all of us saw you?  

 

Alastor: Good luck Miss Violet.  

 

Vi: Wait, did you have something to do with the music earlier? I swear I heard Cait singing.  

 

(STATIC)  

---

Vi didn’t do anything for a moment but realizing she was nearly out of time, she decided to prepare a card to play. Bringing up a private chat with Jinx, she sent off a quick message; Where should we meet up? Let’s play a game.  

She walked back to the councillors who were waiting with bated breath for her to update them. Cait saw her coming out the corner of her eye. 
“We’ve discussed our positions long enough, now I'd like to present an associate of mine who can bring a sense of perspective to our discussion. Vi, the floor is yours.” She stepped back, but whispered into her ear, “Please try not to antagonize them.” Vi let a lazy smile fall on her face. 

“I’m guessing Cait-lyn has told you everything she’s learned about Silco. His operations, his connections and his product.” Vi said lazily. 
The council glanced amongst themselves, unused to an undercity dweller speaking so lackadaisically to them about the corruption that infested their city. 

“That’s why we understand the extent to which the danger is. If this Silco wishes to wage war, it will transform into complete bloodshed. If we are seen as the aggressors, it would tear the undercity apart.” One woman said, Medarda if she had to guess by Caits descriptions, “Marcus has betrayed our trust and allowed this cancer to grow and spread. We are on the backfoot and Silco holds all the cards in negotiations.”  

“What if we tried equalizing the deck. Pushed him into an unwinnable situation and forced his hand so that we can negotiate. I’m not going to pretend like I know this world, all this talking and sitting, waiting for something to happen.” Vi said.  

“That is obvious.” Salo snarked from the side. Vi clenched her fists and swallowed her snippy remark. The bloated figure of Hoskel snickered. Shoola instead rolled her eyes, glancing at Cait’s mother, ‘Are you seriously wasting our time with this?’ she was saying without saying.  

“But I do understand my world. You didn’t get results by sitting around and playing war games. It was bloody violence that got Silco his throne, it’s going to take violence to  get it back.”  

“Get it back? For who exactly?" Bolbok intoned from his metallic suit. Medarda seemed equally interested and leaned in.  

“For the people. You don’t exactly have a dictatorship, neither should the Undercity. A council made up of people we trust should be elected, people from the Lanes who know who they’re representing. Who know what it smells like.”  

Jayce decided to pipe up at this, “Silco wants a city of his own, Zaun, are suggesting the same. Secession?”  

“That’s up to you. The city is going to tear itself apart under Silco, it's been doing that for years, do you seriously think you guys being in charge has actually helped out? Silco already doesn’t trust you, what happens when somebody decides to side with him and give him what he wants.”  

Vi wanted to say more until Cait subtly raised a hand to halt her. Medarda sat upright very stiffly.  

“What do you suggest?” Medarda asked, “I assume you didn’t come here just to vent your frustrations?” she rested her chin on folded hands, though she was clearly tense.  

Vi decided to start playing her hand, she held up the Hexpad and opened up the chat, “How about I give you Silco, gift wrapped.”  

The chat activated with sound emerging from the screen. Jayce went from frustrated to curious to fascinated. The device, once merely a concept design, was fully functional and served a role that he wanted for all his inventions, support. He wanted to focus on that and not the obnoxious noise that could charitably be called music. The rest of the council clutched at their ears and bantered with each other, gabbing about the device and the poor taste of Undercity dwellers.  

---

Jinx: Yo sis, I heard you’re looking to play.  

 

Vi: Yeah, yeah, give me a minute.  

 

Jayce: Wait, wait, are you able to communicate with others with the hexpad?  

 

Vi: Yeah, isn’t that what it’s for.  

 

Jayce: It’s supposed to be a logbook you could share information between, I never thought about using it as a communication relay.  

 

Medarda: All that aside, we can discuss the applications later, can we focus on the matter at hand?  

 

Vi: Got it. Pow-pow, turn down that music. Can barely hear ourselves.  

 

Jinx: I’m mellowing out after our last get together.  

 

Jayce: Wait, do you know each other!?  

 

Jinx: Wait, is someone listening in on our conversation?  

 

Vi: Yes and yes. Jinx, this is the guy you stole that crystal from, Pretty boy, this is my sister.  

 

Hoskel: You’re associated with a known criminal!  

 

Vi: Only by blood.  

 

Hoskel: Guards seize her! We can use her as a useful bargaining chip.  

 

Medarda: Hoskel, please, temper yourself. That isn’t going to work.  

 

Jinx: Yeah, that’s not going to work. Besides, if I’m guessing right, big sis here probably has this grand scheme to get me to turn on Silco and steal me back.  

 

Vi: It’s not a scheme.  

 

Cait: Did you seriously just admit that?  

 

Vi: It wasn’t really a secret anyway. Right now, we’re just talking terms.  

 

Bolbok: As she said, why would she turn on her superior in exchange for-  

 

Jinx: Who said he was my superior?  

 

Medarda: You are associated with Silco correct? I don’t imagine he would be the type to share the role of leader.  

 

Jinx: I’m not his thug. I’m not his underling. I’m his daughter.  

 

Cait: Vi, are you alright!?  

 

Cassandra: She just collapsed; did something happen?  

 

Vi: No, just feel like I’m going to barf.  

 

Jinx: Heeey, fuck you too.  

 

Vi: Fuck you three.  

 

Jinx: Fuck you squared.  

 

Cait: Ladies, ladies, please, you’re both pretty. Can we get back on track?  

 

Jayce: Exactly, so please, Jinx, confirm for us now... are you the one who attacked us and stole the gemstone? And has the gemstone been harnessed as a weapon?  

 

Jinx: You know, I’m very close. If I had this much firepower I could’ve wiped out so many Enforcers.  

 

Salo: She confesses. That is admissible in court. Send Enforcers to arrest her!  

 

Jinx: Uhh, okay, where am I?  

 

Salo: I... well...  

 

Vi: Besides, what court? It’s just you guys sitting in a circle serving each other's pleasure.  

 

Jinx: A literal circlejerk.  

 

Vi: Where did you learn that language? I know Silco and Sevika never taught you that! They’ve never had sex in their lives.  

 

Jinx: Cooper.  

 

Vi: That tracks.  

 

Jayce: How is it this conversation is so easily derailed? Is it normally like this with these two?  

 

Cait: More than you think.  

 

Vi: This is a communal chat, we can all see and hear what you say. But fine. Yes, Jinx is my sister. Yes, she blew up a bunch of Enforcers. Yes, she stole the technology you were no doubt going to share with the Undercity.  

 

Jayce: I had plans to give them the tools we developed.  

 

Jinx: To increase labor output?  

 

Jayce: Vi, you were saying.  

 

Vi: But I also know that Silco was lying to you Jinx. That you no longer have the gemstone and that we have organised a truce. You don’t owe Silco anything.  

 

Jinx: That Marcus guy was a real piece of shit for imprisoning you.  

 

Cassandra: Sheriff Marcus is dead.  

 

Cait: He’s literally responsible for our current conflict.  

 

Cassandra: Caitlyn!  

 

Jinx: No, wait, she’s got a point.  

 

Vi: So how about this, you give us Silco, we drop all charges, scapegoat Silco and his posse, and you can do what you normally do under my supervision.  

 

Hoskel: We never agreed to this!  

 

Jayce: Will you shut up Torman.  

 

Jinx: I dunno, on one hand I was pretty pissed about the whole lying thing. On the other hand, I don’t think I’d have as much freedom under Vi’s supervision as I would under yours Silco.  

 

Cait: Wait, is Silco in there with you?  

 

Jinx: Yeaaah.  

 

Silco: Hello there. So, these are the bean counters.  

 

Shoola: Silco, we have recieved numerous accounts that point to you as the source of illegal smuggling and acts of terrorism.  

 

Silco: No, I believe that has something to do with the leader of the Firefly’s you are harbouring.  

 

Cassandra: We’ll touch on that later, Caitlyn, but for now, Silco, are you currently in possession of Hextech based weaponry?  

 

Silco: Yes. Don’t try to attack us.  

 

Medarda: A lie, obviously.  

 

Vi: You could take this a little more seriously.  

 

Silco: I could couldn’t I? Though i must say, I do have you to thank for expediating things nicely.  

 

Sevika: Are you serious? This little snipe is in contact with a traitor who sides with Piltover and you’re just giving her another free pass? What if they can track us?  

 

Silco: I see your point. Councilman Hoskel, have you tracked our location using this device, thus putting us at your mercy?  

 

Shoola: Torman...  

 

Hoskel: We have you dead to rights you smuggler. We know what you’re doing and where you are. It’s only a matter of time.  

 

Silco: Understood, you have no idea where we are. Thank you for clarifying. See, simple.  

 

Sevika: Yeah, I guess. Stop smiling you little gutter snake.  

 

Jinx: Ye of little faith.  

 

Hoskel: Wait, no, I just said-  

 

Medarda: SHUT UP HOSKEL.  

 

Silco: Since we are at an impasse, let’s make a deal. Open talks. Our two parties will meet at a predetermined location and discuss terms.  

 

Jayce: You no longer possess the gemstone.  

 

SIlco: And you think that will stop us. We took one before, at great cost of life, are you willing to risk greater losses to maintain your precious status quo.  

 

VI: Let’s meet. Last Drop, at the heart of your empire, and why not come fully armed. No use lying to each other.  

 

Silco: It would save time. Full arms it is then. But please, let’s talk.  

 

Jinx: Right, see ya later sis. Piltie, got a bullet for you.  

 

Cait: Little blue gremlin! You’ll never see me coming.  

 

Vi: What you said to Vi last night!  

 

Vi: OKAY! Who taught you this stuff?  

---

Heaven Embassy, First Ring, Hell  

She was going to be having some serious words with those Vee’s after this, she swears to God. If it weren’t for their smear campaign that drove only the most despotic souls to her hotel, she would have almost been tempted to admit that there was no such thing as bad publicity. But all of them she had to turn away, the vicious sinners who thought her hotel was a fast track to Heaven or an excuse to kill angels. ‘ I’m not sure what they’re damage is but I am starting to feel really pissed.’  

Yet here she was, back at it again with the Heavenly hosts. A summons was sent to the hotel following the emergence of multiple news reports of her secret commune. And by summons, it was more akin to burning letters in the sky telling her to move her ass. She left her phone behind, not wanting Adam or any other exorcist to find evidence of the chat, she was already in deep shit no need to keep digging. Unfortunately, this occurred just as she designated Vaggie as the organizer for that day's trust exercises. So that left... Alastor. Finally returned from his mysterious excursion. He mentioned a name, Mimsy if she recalled, and collecting on some debts which he could utilize as some additional hired labour.  

It left a sour taste in her mouth to think that her hotel required slavery to run, so actively forbade anything to do with it, bar temporary work and hired services for a day. But he was still her co-owner and was determined to make the hotel as vibrant as she hoped, she supposed she could leave him in charge of phone sitting duty. At least he didn’t have her password.  

Inside the same meeting room, she sat and waited for Adam to spring up in another hologram as part of another immature prank. What happened instead were three large screens popping up over the three head seats of the long table. Written across the air in front of it was;  

Charlie Morningstar added to Heaven Chat Room 

“Is Heaven seriously setting up a Zoom meeting!?” Charlie exclaimed.  

---

Adam: You know it goats' feet!  

 

Charlie: Hey, those are my feet, I’m proud of them.  

 

Adam: Really? How bout some pics?  

 

Charlie: Christ!  

 

Sera: ...um, greetings daughter of the Morningstar...  

 

Charlie: Oh shit! I mean, fuck, I mean, hello there... sorry, can i start over, this threw me for a loop?  

 

Lute: No chance. We are already stuck for time as is.  

 

Charlie: No, not like- never mind. Okay, we’re here, we have an open dialogue, this is good. Greetings... Sera? Sera. Now that I have the time to speak to you, I’m hoping we can address the whole six month exorcism time block.  

 

Sera: I’m sorry Morningstar but we are not here for that. Recent intelligence has indicated to me that Hell and its hierarchy are making plans to move against Heaven. Such an act would necessitate expediating the annual exorcism.  

 

Charlie: That was my next topic, surprise, there aren’t any plots or plans or anti-heaven commune, it was just a complete misunderstanding the result of a smear campaign.  

 

Lute: We never mentioned an anti-Heaven commune.  

 

Charlie: It was implied in your question. To clarify, this runs completely against my actual thought experiment, for rehabilitation.   

 

Adam: Didn’t we settle this already? The idea was lame, your songs are stupid and you’re a bimbo.  

 

Charlie: My songs are NOT stupid!  

 

Sera: ...erm...  

 

Charlie: Right, priorities. Well, no, we didn’t settle this issue, you cut me off, sang a song, and told me I was out of luck.  

 

Sera: Are these statements true?  

 

Lute: Pretty accurate rundown of the minutes.  

 

Charlie: Are you going to do anything about those two, they’re clearly hostile witnesses.  

 

Sera: This isn’t a court, they aren’t witnesses, you’re not on trial.  

 

Charlie: It sure feels that way. FINE, full transparency, the Hotel is established to rehabilitate sinners, not train them. I would for them to eventually be considered for heaven.  

 

Adam: Objection, doesn’t rehabilitation count as training? I mean, you’re literally training them to sneak into Heaven.  

 

Charlie: What the fuck, I thought this wasn’t a trial!  

 

Sera: It’s not, Adam calm down. But he does raise valid concerns. It sems to me that this is another method by Hell to cheat the system.  

 

Adam: See I told you, the sinners cheated the system in life, and this is how they pay for it. Now they’re trying to sneak out of it.  

 

Sera: Do you deny these claims?  

 

Charlie: Yes, I MEAN NO, I, I, I...ugh, what would Lucy say... what would Luffy say...gasp, that’s it!  

 

Sera: Do you wish to say something?  

 

Adam: Oh please, I’m all ears.  

 

Charlie: I’M CHARLIE MORNINGSTAR AND I’M GOING TO BE QUEEN OF HELLLLLL!  

 

Lute: ...Yeesh, she’s snapped already. Right Adam? Adam?  

 

Adam: What the fuck was that?  

 

Charlie: I stated my name for the record. And I’m making a promise. As the next in line to the throne, it falls under my purview to manage to inhabitants of Hell. As such, I am implementing my own strategy to manage the overpopulation issues of Hell, not involving yearly purges.  

 

Sera: ...right... be that as it may, there is no guarantee that your plan would work, not in a set amount of time that would prevent an overflow of Hell.  

 

Adam: Besides, you’re completely ignoring the problem of what happens when they do get in.  

 

Charlie: Huh?  

 

Adam: I saw you’re little promotion event, you’re letting literally anyone into that place. Thieves, rapists, murderers. And you want those people to go to Heaven. WHY THE HELL DO YOU THINK THEY ENDED UP IN HELL IN THE FIRST PLACE!?  

 

Charlie: ...  

 

Adam: Then say they do get to Heaven, what about their victims, the rape victims, the murder victims, killer plan, you put them both in the same place, like that isn’t going to fuck everything up in Heaven.  

 

Charlie: I think...  

 

Lute: You didn’t think!  

 

Sera: Wait a minute-  

 

Adam: Exactly! You live in your own happy little world, you’ve never had to see the worst things imaginable and decide that everything good was worth fighting for!  

 

Sera: This is the most serious I’ve ever seen you Adam about anything.  

 

Adam: Yoooo, sorry, got a little high strung there, just need to mellow out. So, give it to us straight Princess. How are you going to manage all of that when you send those creeps to paradise?  

 

Charlie: ...  

 

Sera: Miss Morningstar?  

 

Lute: C’mon, we’re waiting.  

 

Charlie: ...redemption is unconditional...  

 

Adam: Sorry sweetie couldn’t quite hear that.  

 

Charlie: I offer redemption unconditionally. I don’t offer it sparingly. I don’t choose who gets it, never mind that I don’t choose who takes it. But it’s offered all the same. I met some people, people you’d be surprised to hear from, how redemption is truly available to all? Superheroes, convicts, cult followers, pirates, they all have faith that people can be better. That just because they failed doesn’t mean they can’t be better.  

 

Adam: So, so, so what, murderers and rapists can get better?  

 

Charlie: MAYBE! Maybe they can. Maybe if I go to a murderer and say if he works with me, he has a chance at redemption, maybe he gets on his knees, begs for fogiveness, screams it out to the rest of the world he knows he is wrong but the rest of the world will ignore him because why should they care? In this pit, why should anyone care? Well I do because it’s right. Because it’s kind. You can say I’m doing this for me, I don’t care. But when you come down here in six months, you might find yourself staring down at a group of people who genuinely care about themselves, who care about one another. Maybe one day, they will find themselves in Hell, they will not be the same person that entered Hell.  

 

Sera: But you can’t know that?  

 

Charlie: Neither can you so that’s why you operate on faith! I’ve woken up to the fact that this is a long process. I’m speaking to people who’ve done horrible things. They’ll probably relapse more than once. But I’m giving them an ear and a voice. I can’t fix them. But I can help them be better than before.  

 

Sera: We don’t know for certain if you are operating this hotel as a means of building an army or as your own vanity project.  

 

Adam: Oh yeah, suck it bitch!  

 

Charlie: I don’t even care anymore. Whatever.  

 

Sera: ADAM! However, we would like to establish a probationary period. Three months from this day, you will be supervised by a delegate of our choosing. They will dwell among you and determine what your goals are. Any attempts to undermine, harm or impede this delegate will be met with the immediate enactment of the purge.  

 

Charlie: Will you hear what they have to say after the fact? When they prove me right?  

 

Sera: We will reconvene in three months. Mind yourself Morningstar.  

 

Adam: Wha- uhh, yeah, watch your back!  

 

Sera: We’re going Adam!  

 

Adam: Coming...  

---

The chat ended and Charlie collapsed into her chair. She breathed deep and rubbed her hands down her face. As she pulled at her eyelids, she let out a groan of frustration. But at the same time, she felt like a whale had been lifted off her back. She cracked her neck and sprinted back to the hotel, anxious to know how the rest of her friends were doing and how the chat had been doing since this morning with poor Izuku.  

 

 

Notes:

Finally getting through the hurdle that are these chapters. These are the hills I need to mount to do the stuff I really want to do in this chat fic. Do tell me if I'm leaving stuff out or if I make a mistake, it's the only way I'll learn. Comments are quite literally my lifeblood to keep this story chugging along. But I definitely think I'm getting my groove back and getting some originality up in here.

Apologies for the density, I tried breaking it up with some chat formats between each large body of text. I really wanted to give Arcane their dues as I feel they've been under-represented in this story. So next chapter will be the wrap up to Vi and midoriya's story and after that a conclusion to Luffy and Lucy's story. Then an epilogue for part 1.

Chapter 24: Battle for their lives interlude 1

Summary:

After her dress down from Heaven, Charlie needs a little pep talk. Maybe the chat can help.

Notes:

Just a little update to cover Charlie's mindset and how she reconciles the redemption of sinners with where they end up afterwards.

Chapter 24  

 

Charlie: Hey guys, can I talk?  

 

Lucy: The rest of the guys are in crisis mode at the moment. Not much we can do all the way in our universe, dang it that’s still so weird to say.  

 

Charlie: I get it and I get it. Even for all the powers of Hell, the notion of travelling between worlds seems counter-intuitive to what I know of God. I know he created the heavens and the Earth, the unsaid being everything else but...  

 

Lucy: Could he also be responsible for multiple versions of his creation? Are there alternate versions of God? Heck, multiverse implies there are alternate versions of ourselves, could there be another me out there not on this trip?  

 

Cooper: Schrodingers theory of quantum mechanics dictates that until we see it, it don’t exist. Now, that could apply to God in the past, but you’ve met his granddaughter, so for my money, and peace of mind, there ain’t no other us than us.  

 

Charlie: Soooo... don’t think about it.  

 

Cooper: Don‘t think about it.  

 

Lucy: Excuse me, we were talking about something else, go play with the dog.  

 

Cooper: Not cause you told me to, but cause I wanna.  

 

Charlie: I never did get to see your dog, can you send pics, I need a pick-me-up.  

 

Lucy: Something on your mind?  

 

Charlie: Yeah. You ever find someone that you just can’t get along with, who constantly pokes holes in your beliefs and then one day you find out the worst person you know has a point.  

 

Lucy: I have the feeling like you were going to end that sentence with insert punchline here. You know I’ve been travelling with gunslinging ghoul who eats the remains of those he killed.  

 

Charlie: And that’s why you are the first one I want to talk to. Next will be Izuku because I need to get into his head with all this Kacchan talk.  

 

Lucy: Yeah, the poor guy is flip flopping way too much about this issue. Hope Uraraka or Iida can get through to him.  

 

Charlie: Team effort. But that’s another issue. Fact is, I just came from what’s essentially an injunction-  

 

Cooper: Those are never fun.  

 

Lucy: When did you ever attend an injunction?  

 

Charlie: and I’m pretty sure I was raked over the coals for my whole hotel idea and then Adam, god what an asshole, actually springs on me a good point. What happens to the people in Heaven when I send someone who was essentially nightmare into the lives of those they affected.  

 

Lucy: I’m not sure I follow, like, we talking a dictator or...  

 

Charlie: Dammit, I didn’t think about that! What happens when I get some dictator who comes along and they get into Heaven, where more than likely a bunch of people whose lives they’ve ruined see him again?  

 

Cooper: Y’know, my great-great-grandaddy fought in a war, one great big war that was supposed to sort everything out for the rest of us. Saw a lot of messed up things over there, a lot of people who did not want to live through things like that ever again. I can see the dilemma.  

 

Lucy: So, say for example, if I died, Cooper here was the one to kill me-  

 

Cooper: Most likely.  

 

Lucy: ...thanks...and I go up to Heaven, he dies and goes to Hell, which is most likely.  

 

Cooper: ...thanks...  

 

Lucy: Couple years later, Cooper suddenly, ding, pops up in Heaven saying he’s reformed and not the man he used to be.  

 

Charlie: How can anyone expect to say they are living in paradise or be considered a winner if they have to live with that knowledge for the rest of their eternal afterlife.  

 

Zoro: Sounds like Hell is getting a timeshare.  

 

Charlie: Sudden Zoro is sudden.  

 

Zoro: Didn’t mean to intrude, trying to work this thing out and find Nami’s private channel, got lost and ended up on the, what are we calling this, Multiverse chat?  

 

Cooper: How do you get lost on a phone?  

 

Lucy: Says the guy who can’t figure out a Pip-boy. We’ll table that discussion for later, that name sounds a bit derivative.  

 

Charlie: But you got a point. Hell is just bleeding into Heaven, it’s not good that’s spreading.  

 

Zoro: Sounds like it’s evening out. The more good that appears in Hell, the more suffering starts appearing in Heaven.  

 

Charlie: Feels like a never-ending cycle. What’s the solution? Am I really making things better or do I not understand how the world really works.  

 

Cooper/Zoro: Yes.  

 

Lucy: Little bit more constructive than that guys.  

 

Zoro: Honestly you sound a lot like Luffy. Didn’t care about what I was motivated by, what I did, I mean I killed his kind for a living. But he still took me on as his first mate. Same with Usopp. And now with Nami.  

 

Lucy: And Sanji.  

 

Zoro: Luffy’s not right about everything.  

 

Charlie: Be serious Zoro.  

 

Zoro: Fact is, Luffy doesn’t care about hurting other peoples feelings because they don’t take the time to get to know us. Anyone else would’ve turned tail on Nami but he didn’t because he’s willing to trust her.  

 

Charlie: So my hotel. Nobody is willing to listen to those in Hell but because I do, what, it makes them valid.  

 

Cooper: Means you put trust in someone. Means somebody trusted them to be better. Hell, I'm in the same boat as the red head missy. Miss MacLean here coulda left me to my maker but decided to stick to her guns and prove me wrong.  

 

Lucy: I had to believe in something, or the wasteland would give me the worst option to choose from.  

 

Charlie: But Adam is still making a valid point. I would never turn my back on the hotel, those who trusted me, they’re making an effort, honest to God effort. But what happens when they get to heaven. You don’t go to Hell just for being nasty, someone had to suffer.  

 

Zoro: What are you going to do about it? It’s one thing to have ideals. One thing to stick to your ideals. Luffy has an ideal to be king of the pirates. He’s going to get there because he believes in himself. But it’s entirely different to work for your ideals. He’s going to fight off Arlong, someone who kicked his ass and took his friend under threat of violence, because he needs the best navigator to follow his dreams.  

 

Lucy: I brought Cooper along because I want him to show me the way through this mess. Maybe he might hate me but you’re the only one I trust.  

 

Cooper: ...I never said I hated you...  

 

Charlie: Heaven’s sending down an emissary, someone to keep an eye on things make sure I don’t stir up any trouble.  

 

Cooper: Well good, you already don’t have to worry bout that, you never wanted to do that in the first place.  

 

Charlie: Which means they will be sitting around for the next couple of months not doing anything. Which means I have an emissary from Heaven living in my hotel. Which means I have a direct link to Heaven.  

 

Zoro: Sounds like a nice bit of subterfuge to undermine Heaven from the inside.  

 

Usopp: Sounds like you have a hate boner for Heaven.  

 

Lucy: Sudden Usopp is sudden.  

 

Zoro: No I don’t, I’m more of Hell guy, that’s all.  

 

Usopp: Besides, the way I see it, they can only get into Heaven if they truly redeem themselves. Nobody just gets in because they believe they will. Heck, we have a bunch of scary folks here that so believe they are chosen ones, they pretty much live in the clouds and do whatever they want. I heard they burned down a village here in the East Blue a couple of years back.  

 

Zoro: I think I saw that.  

 

Usopp: All I’m saying is, if they actually want redemption, then they’ll get in, if they don’t, they stay where they belong. Can’t get simpler than that. Honestly, there really should be some back and forth with you and the other guys, prep them for coming in, get everyone used to the idea. And maybe put in a good word for us?  

 

Zoro: You’re seriously panhandling for a place in Heaven?  

 

Usopp: I’m a pirate now, a renowned pirate, let me remind you, I’m going to take any opportunity to stay outta the bad place.  

 

Charlie: Thanks for talking this out with me guys. You, sniff, are the best, sniff, multiverse support group I could ask for.  

 

Lucy: Aww, c’mon, I’m going to cry if you cry.  

 

Usopp: Sniff, me too.  

 

Zoro: Alright, I’m shutting this down.  

 

Cooper: Me too, dry your tears, you need your fluids.  

 

Lucy: You do care!  

 

Cooper: JESUS! Get off. And... here are your... dog pics.  

 

Charlie: HE’S PRECIOUS!  

 

Notes:

There's an awful lot of overlap between these stories the more I write this fic. The abundance of parental issues, iconic songs and plenty of singing, and concept of redemption.

Whether it be sinners, villains, pirates, factions, civilisations or the individual, a lot of people want redemption or are willing to find their own. What that means depends on the individual.

Some may seek a better life, might be running from their old life or trying to stay in the good life, chances are they made choices that affect a lot of people, most of all themselves.

It's up to them to find redemption, it's their choice. But as a burned man once said; "We all go through periods of darkness. In such times, we can turn to the lord, but it's good to have friends."

I promise this isn't going to become a preaching stump for me to pontificate about religion but it's hard not discuss it when Heaven and Hell are literal locations in this story.

Chapter 25: Battle for their lives part 3

Summary:

One more fight wraps up as Izuku makes an enemy for life, meanwhile Vi thinks she's leading a trap.

 Chapter 25  

Undercity, Piltover  

Vi flexed her muscles and danced on the spot. Despite their weight, the Atlesian Gauntlets felt comfortable and balanced on her arms. Caitlyn was given a new rifle, and Jayce took up the hammer he forged of equally impractical size. As the only experienced navigators willing to go into the devils' den, Cait and Vi were sent as bodyguards for Jayce to meet and discuss with Silco. He couldn’t help rubbing in how he finally got Cait to be part of his security detail. Vi give him a shoulder punch for her, “I’d use my rifle, she’s the safe option.”  

Jayce, however, looked troubled. Although he carried the hammer, he was reluctant to give her or Cait any tools or weapons until Cassandra demanded that if Caitlyn was going into danger, then she would be outfitted with the best Hextech he could manufacture. He did so reluctantly. That being said, she couldn’t help blogging about it to the chat. With a selfie of her and Cait decked out in dear, though she refused to wear a blue uniform.  

 

Vi: Check it bitches!  

 

Luffy: Awesome! I want those!  

 

Vaggie: Mierda santa! Where did you get those?  

 

Vi: Cait’s sugar daddy hooked us up.  

 

Cait: HE’S NOT M-he's not my sugar father.  

 

Angel: Did you seriously, pfft, hahahaha, sugar father.  

 

Husk: Heh, sounds like some high-end Brit chick asking her dad to pass the sugar.  

 

Angel: Sugar father. Please pass the sugar father.  

 

Pentious: Ssssssome sugar papa, may I have ssssssome more?  

 

Baxter: Look upon my plantation dear, father has so much more sugar my dear. Hahaha  

 

Husk/Pentious/Angel: hahahahahaha  

 

Angel: Wild, I brought them to one of our active war zones to bond and you managed to do it in two minutes.  

 

Cait: ...you weren’t this much of an asshole two days ago Pentious, sniff, sniff.  

 

Vi: Okay guys, dial it back, you’ll make cupcake cry.  

 

Vaggie: Yeah, careful with the cupcake guys, no sugar before dinner.  

 

Angel/Husk/Baxter/Pentious: pfthahahaha!  

 

Vaggie: Sorry, couldn’t resist.  

 

Luffy: Can we talk about the gauntlets please?  

 

Cait: Yes, please!  

 

Vi: Uber charged and ready to kill. And these badboys use hex gemstones, I’m pretty sure I can punch Jinx into last week.  

 

Izuku: As much as I want to wig out over the gauntlets, I know Mei does.  

 

Mei: Glorious!  

 

Izuku: I do have to ask is it safe to talk about fighting Jinx considering she can tune into the chat.  

 

Vi: No need, there’s this button I can use and REPORT & MUTE someone if I press it enough times.  

 

Izuku: So Jinx can’t read this?  

 

Vi: Not much point in hiding it really, she knows we’re coming and she’s going to get a faceful of fist, so she’ll definitely get an up close and personal look at these beauties.  

 

Mei: They don’t look refined enough for combat. So many exposed joints and the coolants are literally bolted to the outside of that thing. One wrong move those puppies will be out like a busted fuse.  

 

Jayce: To be fair, these are supposed to be for mining. It’s meant to make it easier to clear debris and power through bedrock. I’ll take notes of its functionality though. I’m still a scientist.  

 

Vi: A scientist with a giant fuck you hammer.  

 

Mei: PICS!  

 

Photo has been uploaded to chat. { Jayce c aught looking off guard  holding his hammer in what he thinks is a badass pose}  

 

Usopp: I need me one of those. Usopp hammer times a thousand.  

 

Cait: Usopp I’ve been wondering, why don’t you use a gun or a rifle? Luffy described you as the crew's sniper, though in our nautical terms, you’re better classified as a gunner.  

 

Zoro: Too bad he can’t use a cannon.  

 

Sanji: He can’t what? How do you not know how to use a cannon?  

 

Usopp: Hey, I can use a cannon, I’ve fired over hundred in my career. By myself, with a single wick.  

 

Cait: Talk to me Usopp.  

 

Usopp: Okay real talk, I can use a cannon, I just, froze that day. We were having fun, discussing the flag, my position as captain-  

 

Luffy: I’m still the captain Usopp!  

 

Usopp: AND, getting bombed by marines and locked into one mode of fighting I felt a little panicked. I use my sling because I can use anything with it. I took out Kuro by shooting a frying pan at him. And well, what if I mess up my rifle or run out of bullets.  

 

Cait: I either get more bullets, or everyone is too dead to care.  

 

Usopp: Woah, right, well, it’s still limited. Like Vi says, if you’re cornered, throw sand in their eyes.  

 

Cait: Vi?  

 

Vi: Improvise. You should take a page out of his book and diversify. When we were cornered by Silco and you gave up your rifle to heal me, appreciate it by the way, we pretty much had to keep on running until we got to your place.  

 

Usopp: I like to keep my options open. I have my pellets, tabasco star, lead star, working on a new one, exploding star, aghhh, amazing, or hammer, or frying pan.   

 

Jayce: To be fair, the new peacemaker is designed witht he gemstone in mind, so it’s pretty much infinite ammo, or at least until the gemstone is depleted.  

 

Cait: So Usopp?  

 

Usopp: Can I get my hands on one of those gemstones? I just got a great idea for some new ammo and a new attack.  

 

Jayce: Right now I'm working out the kinks, so Cait if it starts feeling hot or it seizes up, throw it as far away as possible.  

 

Cait: You gave me a faulty gun!?  

 

Jayce: How did your old gun work in the first place, break action, breach loaded, lever action and a feed tube that folds in half.  

 

Mei: Uuuuuhhhhh  

 

Usopp: Uuuuuuuuhhhh  

 

Baxter: Uuuuuhhhhh  

 

Vaggie: Great job, you broke the minds of our engineers. And we were JUST GETTING STARTED!  

 

Angel: Wait, wait, wait, don’t throw me in there!  

 

Pentious: Pleassssse wait, I’m snesitive ssssskin. AAAAAGGHHHH!  

 

Baxter: Don’t. You. Dare. Argh!  

 

Vaggie: Throwing them into a gang war to make them bond.  

 

Vi: Neat, same.  

 

Husk: Hey now, hands off, I ain’t got nothing to do with that shit, I’m just a bartender.  

 

Cait: Husker.  

 

Husk: Yeah?  

 

Cait: Give ‘em some sugar.  

 

Husk: That shit was never funnyyyyyyyyy!  

 

Cait: Damn right.  

 

Now they were outside the warehouse, Enforcers lining up along the windows. Distantly, Vi recalled this warehouse, or at least one, like it, where she and Powder were separated and Vander had died. One warehouse among many. At least it was open, airy, she couldn’t deal with a small office right now. Since arriving in Piltover, she was surprised at how at ease she felt in every room. The Council room was wide open, Jayce’s forge, the streets themselves. And Cait’s room. All to Cait's self, it was bigger than the one she shared with Powder, Milo and Claggor. She wouldn’t mind falling to sleep in such a wide-open room like that.  

---

USJ, UA, Japan  

Izuku coiled a tendril of Black whip around Tsuyu and Kyoka, with himself as the anchor between them, Tsu leapt off the sliding boat towards the stairwell to the entrance. There they would land in the safety of All Mights presence.   

As the boat slid along, the Nomu stood stock still, staring at the boat coming towards its master. Shigaraki, flummoxed by the sudden appearance of a boat coming at him, broke from his stupor and lashed both hands out in front of him. As the boat slowed down, he waited for the boat to come to him. When it did, he gripped the exposed bow. The front began to rot and rust away into chips of metal and carbon-fiber. Soon the boat engulfed him and the Nomu, distracting them long enough for Eraserhead to roll out of the way into the support of Iida and Uraraka, who hoisted his arms over their shoulders and dragged him up the stairs.  

Tsu and Kyoka landed softly as Izuku lowered them down ahead of himself, though he followed through after them with a sudden stomp to the ground and sharp pains up his arms and legs. Even with the reinforcement of Black Whip, the surge of super strength he unlocked still caused massive damage to his bones. Not enough to shatter them but enough to feel the strain where he stood. Soon Tsu and Kyoka were guiding him just like Aizawa was.  

They took a few steps to catch up with Iida and Uraraka. Finally, he could get some answers.  

“I’m guessing you used the chat to bypass whatever was blocking the signal here to call All Might?” asked Midoriya. His head lolled in fatigue; the use of all this energy was draining.  

“That’s exactly what happened, yeah. And with the teachers not far behind. They should clear up the mess. Especially now that the boat has pretty much alerted every other villain to come here.” As Uraraka said, the center of the USJ was a hot spot for the villains who weren’t busy to reconvene. Some looked worse for wear; singed, charred, bruised and limping.   

‘ They must have retreated from our heavy hitters. And if we’re following protocol, they’re going to hang back until the teachers come.’  

Aizawa moaned slightly, trying to conceal his pain, and rolled his head to meet Izuku’s eyes.   

“Midoriya, if you’re going to continue this trend, you’re going to be a real problem child for me. I thought I told you to leave this to the teachers and stay back.”  

Tsuyu looked nervous, trying to speak up and explain for them, “You see sir, ribbit, we were put in a situation where villains were coming after us and we had to get out, ribbit.”  

“It was a lose-lose situation, we chose the best worst option, being scolded for quirk use.” Kyoka piped in.  

“Sir, where’s Thirteen?” Izuku asked. Aizawa was puzzled until Uraraka explained, “She was injured by the portal villain.”  

“Can you move, sir?” Izuku asked, a little stronger now.  

Aizawa sighed in annoyance, “That’s beside the point, legally you need permission to use quirks against villains, and you may have accidentally crushed one to death.”  

“Okay guys, drop Aizawa. As Vice-Rep, I authorize you to drop the professional so he can go back into the fray and deal with the villains while we run for our lives.”  

Iida looked apoplectic at that remark, Tsu and Kyoka stopped mid step and stared at him, Uraraka was straight faced, “Can we get that in writing?”  

Aizawa, for his part, looked humored by that remark, “Cancel that order, override homeroom teacher. As I was going to say, you were supposed to stay out of trouble but given the circumstances of endangered lives, the authorities will let it slide. That being said, I’m still not sure throwing a boat at the villain was the best option. Stop smiling All Might.”  

Toshinori turned away and coughed to hide his chuckle. “Not to worry, Thirteen has already been seen to, and you will too, with these handy dandy Stimpaks from a reliable source.”  

Suddenly the side of the boat crumbled into a pile of dust and the boat capsized to one side. Shigaraki was heaving, almost growling, fingers splayed and his form crouched, ready to sprint.   

And he did.  

Right at Izuku.  

In a surge of energy, black tendrils emerged from Izuku and, reinforced by the strength enhancer, hoisted the four students and Aizawa out of Shigaraki’s reach. Just as the hand was about to land on Izuku, All Might caught the arm in his hand.   

“You damn faker, All Might, getting in the way. We’re not ready for you right now. We need our cleric for our tank to do some real damage.” He reared his herad over the mass of muscles in Toshinori’s arms to stare at Izuku, “And you, you threw a boat at me.”  

Izuku tried but, “I can’t think of any boat puns.” he said in almost a panic as the villains fingers that he decomposed part of Aizawa’s elbow wriggled in All Might's grip, trying to get closer.  

“Bah, mediocre hero. Nomu, smash!”   

All Might was blindsided by a strength equivalent to his own and tossed into the center. However, because he was holding onto Shigaraki, the Nomu’s master was taken along for the ride and was in a collapsed heap next to All Might. As the Nomu reared up to deliver a hammer blow to All might, the hero responded by holding up a hand, catching the swing, though it caused cracks in the ground, and with his other fist, drove it straight into the abdominals.  

Again and again. The blows landed, the Nomu didn’t shift. Each blow sent off a shockwave that blasted Izuku and Shigaraki onto their backs. The shockwave became so powerful it sent the rest of the assembled villains flying back. The speed of the punches increased until they were a blur and the flesh of the abdomen began to wear away.  

“What! It’s supposed to be invulnerable to your punches! It’s supposed to heal! How are you this strong still?”  

“I had a very stimulating treatment. HAHAHA!”  

“I DON’T GET IT!”  

“I did.”   

“Shut up kid!”  

Finally, the coup de grace was delivered and the Nomu was punched so hard, while at that exact moment Aizawa had recovered under the healing nature of the stimpak and used the full might of his quirk to hinder his healing ability, that the Nomu exploded from the torso up.  

So overwhelmed by the state of All might’s power, Shigaraki had forgotten to direct the Nomu to fight back. ‘ No matter’  

“Villains, thugs, hired goons, march on the teachers, grab any student you can get your hands on, make them pay!”  

“Master,” Kurogiri appeared next to Shigaraki, choking slightly as it coughed up blood from the harsh beating Midnight laid into him, “we don’t have anymore hired goons.”  

“Wha...” All around, the villains were being put to sleep, shot in the knees, blasted with shockwave yells or otherwise incapacitated. The teachers weren’t idle while All Might went to town on the Nomu but their efficiency was so fast Izuku hadn’t even seen it.  

“Fine then, I’ll take my drop of blood elsewhere," he dashed once more at Izuku, “starting with this upstart brat. Let’s see how you like a boat to the face you... you... boaty mcboatface.”  

“Ummm”  

“Shut up, I couldn’t think of a pun!” he lunged. All might tried to rear around but even with the Stimpak slowly mending him, he had overextended himself by reverting back to his prime level strength. He crouched and spat out a glob of blood. All he needed was to-  

Shigaraki tripped. He face planted into the ground, courtesy of Izuku sending a tendril to wrap around his ankle while he was shouting for his goons to act. As he laid there, eating shit, the hand that once rested on his face flopped to the side.  

“Father. Father get back, come back to me.” He gripped the ground and tossed the crumbling remains into Izuku’s face. He swiped a hand across Izuku’s face, causing him to fall back in terror.   

On instinct, Izuku covered his fists with the tendrils, wrapping them around and around, over and over until they were giant gauntlets, just like the ones Vi had worn and shown in the chat. Then he manifested two more, just like how Angel had, right below his armpit. Around his head he formed a helmet, not too different from the armor Maximus, as he was now known, wore.  

Shigaraki was dumbfounded. He wasn’t sure how it happened; these mass of tendrils that looked like stick insects before and he could barely control enough to carry five people, was now forming intricate armor and appendages.   

Taking advantage of his confusion, though he himself was confused where this strength and focus came from, he launched a huge gauntlet forward and shoved Shigaraki away. He tumbled back, while Izuku stomped his foot, digging hiumself in and creating a bulwark to centre himself.  

As Shigaraki regained his bearings and Kurogiri was sweeping in to create a portal under his feet, suddenly the villain was bound by an iceberg and knocked in the head by an explosive blast. Using the distraction, Izuku stayed where he was and threw a punch from meters away. The fist shot out like a pistol and landed on Shigaraki’s temple. He threw another punch and it landed in his gut.   

“GUM-GUM SMASH”  

Then he threw right, then his left, right, left, right, left. Each punch going through Shigaraki to reach the other side. Each punch thrown like an elastic band, sprang back at him to it’s original shape. The two other arms got in on the action. Each one firing off with the turn of his shoulders or the twist of his hips, each one at random. Shigaraki was slowly being pushed back, his sneakers sliding back along the concrete. He tried using his hands to block, to catch the punches and dissolve whatever it was, but the tendrils were an intangible energy only given mass when they connected with his face. He couldn’t decay anything.  

The blows were true, the form was solid, but the strength was nonexistent. Shigaraki was getting the death of a thousand blows. One not as powerful as the conventional fist but many over the course of one minute were like rubber pellets.   

Finally he reared back, the appendages gone, his armor receding, and he channeled his strength into one large "BLACK WHIP GAUNTLET!”  

The gauntlet shot forward and landed right in the villains face. He was thrown backwards and landed on his ass. Dazed and confused. Just as Izuku finally ran out of juice and flopped backwards, his hands hanging limply by his sides. Shigaraki tried one more time to get up but got a kick to his back.  

“Stay down you hand faced fuck. Don’t move or I’ll kill you.” Bakugo growled, sending out blasts that disorientated and flipped Shigaraki, “Guess I’ll have to finish you off. Hold the other one down two face.”  

“Don’t make me freeze you villain. You’re already incapacitated. Don’t add frostbite to your condition.” Todoroki said in a low menace.  

“Wait, young Bakugo, young Todoroki, don’t underestimate him!” warned All Might.  

“Too late.” growled Kurogiri, who disappeared into himself and used a second portal to teleport Shigaraki. As he was pulled in, he glared through his father's fingers at the green-haired brat who smacked him without touching him.  

After leaving Aizawa in the teacher's care, Uraraka took off at speed, using her quirk to levitate down the stairs, where she deactivated it. She pressed the pads of her fingers to Izuku and gently lifted him to safety. Soon Snipe and Midnight were at the base of the steps, grabbing hold of the incapacitated, floating Izuku and carrying him to a safe spot. All Might waved them off, took Izuku from them and leapt into the air, his back to the wind. Todoroki looked on curiously, Bakugo stared enviously.    

---

Undercity, Piltover  

  “OK MOVE IN!” Caitlyn called out. Vi was impressed, this was the first time Cait was taking charge of an Enforcer raid and she took to it like a duck to water. She and Jayce barged through the freight door, the new gauntlets rending the metal like cardboard, while Jayce launched a charged bolt of energy at the last guard standing. His associates were flattened by the door and trodden underfoot by Vi and the Enforcers. The thugs and mooks on the catwalks pulled rifles and shot off round after round in a mad scramble to maintain order.  

They infantry fanned out, masks on, paired up and carrying scoped snipers. They picked off the armed workers one by one, thinning the numbers as Vi was using the pressure of the punches to launch her up to the catwalks. She’d have to thank Izuku later for the idea of using air pressure for traversal. As more and more thugs fell to gunfire, she saw a new sight that turned her stomach. A gathering of trembling children, clutching at little pistols and crouched in the corner pointing at her.  
She had never been more grateful to not be wearing a uniform.  

 

She approached slowly, arms held up placatingly but angled well enough to deflect ricochets. They seized up, pistols pointed right at her eyes. She knelt. She unsheathed her arm from one fist. And she held out a hand to them. ‘ Izi, you’re making me too soft. Luffy would’ve just punched them! ’  

 

Something roared and leapt into the air, landing in a burst of red chemicals in the center of the enforcer squad. Gas masked berserker juggernauts wielding glowing blades were ripping and tearing the hunkered pairs. It sliced through five of them before Jayce swung at one of them with his giant fuck-off hammer. Vi looked back at the kids, back to Jayce being advanced on by another juggernaut, back to the kids raising and pointing their guns in the air and then back at the squads being taken down. She needed to make a choice.  

 

“Stay quiet, stay low. I’ll be back!” She shoved her arm back into the gauntlet and as it sealed shut, she hopped the guard rail to pile drive the sneaking juggernaut. The shockwave sent the Enforcers flying onto their backs. The juggernaut was a pile of twisted metal and broken bones. The last three enforcers, she gestured to climb up and secure the kids. They nodded and tooped off. More and more juggernauts were raining down. Vi and Jayce made it to the central walkway and stood back-to-back.  

They were swarmed all around as the suited men snarled and lunged with jetpacks and swords at the exposed fighters.  

 

Just then, the skylights shattered in and down repelled the reinforcements. Caitlyn took command of the firing squad, nailing down the flyers and picking off stragglers. Jayce released bolts of energy at the nearest juggernaut and switched quickly to hammer mode to bash the melee fighters. Vi blocked and diverted each blade slash, parrying blows from these chemed out bruisers. She gave left hooks and rights, swept low and busted the kneecaps of the inexperienced combatants. One overextended their punch and sshe got in close with her fists piledriving his stomach. They fell to the side and collapsed down below. She cackled and smiled, sending a mock salute to Cait as she took out the jetpack on another one. Jayce likewise was smiling too. He was getting a taste for it, it seemed. Then she heard a blast.  

 

A cluster of them at first, followed by a series of detonations that ran up the side and took out the walkway latching's. Soon there was raining metal showering down on the two, while she spied the enforcer trio hanging from a railing and keeping the group of kids from falling. A juggernaut wreathed in green gas and armored gold was wielding a flamethrower and falling straight at them. She looked around for an out.  

Cait was on the roof.  

Jayce was tied up firing bolts of energy.  

She had no defence besides the gauntlets.  

So, she held them up, stamping one foot down to steady her and roared out a battle cry so loud it muted the rest of the battlefield. From her fists emerged a blue, bubble-like forcefield, it enveloped both her and Jayce. He was shaken from his violent frenzy and looked about in wonder. The falling suit was halted midair, flames spewing out and around the protected pair. Then is jumped off and kept firing, getting closer and closer to Vi as she held up the barrier. Jayce blinked away the haze of battle and spotted behind the felled juggernaut a teenage boy was standing and wielding an iron bar. He breathed out heaving gasps, relieved and terrified at his blind firing.  

Vi stared through the field, waiting for the fire to let up. It did so when Cait fired off a round at the rear tank and caused gas to expend out the back. The flamethrowers petered out and Vi dropped her forcefield, willing it to disappear, then punched backwards. The momentum carried her towards the golden juggernaut, until she was feet first through the helmet. He landed on his back, uttering a groan of resigned pain. She used the gauntlets to tear off the helmet. One of the Chem barons, the brass jawed wannabe gangster who held a cigarette in his mouth. He glared pitifully at Vi, who reared back her fist and launched it in his face, dislocating his jaw, breaking his nose and knocking him out.  

---

All around, the factory/warehouse was in disarray. Plenty of mooks to be arrested. But no sign of Silco or Jinx. She spied the office, at the top of the factory, from which the golden armor had emerged. She and Jayce hightailed it up to the top, where inside, Cait was staring blankly at a burning wall filled with graffiti paint.  

The burned paint peeled away to reveal a message written behind.  

“Didn’t think it was going to be that easy, did you sis?”  

She pulled her arms from the gauntlets and yanked out the hexpad, its durable frame surviving the whole ordeal. As she opened up the chat, it looked like Jinx was waiting.  

 

Vi: Where is Silco? I thought we were making progress here Powder?  

 

Jinx: It’s JINX! Don’t you know the best way to be released from prison on good behavior is to lie to your shrink.  

 

Vi: Charlie’s going to be pissed, you know that. But no more than I will be if you don’t get your ass here in the next two minutes.  

 

Jinx: Bit harsh don’t you think. I mean, we did give you one of the barons and bosses. That should make the happy people of glitter city even happier.  

 

Cait: We agreed on Silco, you pulled the wool over our eyes.  

 

Jinx: And if things happened as I thought they would, the only reason you’re sending us this message is because you went in there guns blazing and tried to arrest him.  

 

Jayce: So you won’t give us Silco, you won’t turn yourself over, you realise you’ve left no alternative and will now be facing down the fullest extent of our law enforcement.  

 

Jinx: Like I said, bit harsh, considering I only have a minute left to turn myself over and I’m up here, way too far away to do anything but make my arrest warrant a whole lot worse.  

 

Cait: ...up where?  

 

Jinx: Generally; Piltover. Specifically; the council chambers where you guys were about an hour ago. Nice boots Vi, did you kiss them before they were given to you by your Enforcer girlfriend?  

 

Jayce: Are the other councilors safe? Have you done anything to them?  

 

Jinx: Maybe I have, maybe I haven’t. But I am going to send a message. STAY OUT OF ZAUM!  

 

Cait: Is my mother safe?  

 

Jinx: Oooh, I’ll save her for last. One more mistake in leaving without making sure I didn’t follow you in.  

 

Vi: No, Powder, you made a mistake. You told us exactly what you’re going to do on an open chat including Little Man. Did you make sure to count who went on this mission?  

 

Jinx: ...oh~no!  

 

Ekko: Sup bitch.  

 

 

Notes:

Tough break kid, you almost had her Vi.

I think I prefer this blended format where story text is broken up with chat logs.

Some of this content is very niche, the rest is very obvious, I'll let you decide for yourself which is which.

Next we have Charlie returning to the hotel to meet this adjudicator/emissary, while Luffy wraps up Arlong in a neat package. Even better, canned.

Chapter 26: Battle for their lives part 4

Summary:

The final clash between Luffy and Arlong. In song! (Cue Tom Cardy, Perception Check)
Lucy comes face to face with Moldaver and has no time for her enigma talk.
Someone from Heaven arrives to check on the hotel.

Chapter 26 

---

Cocoyashi Village, Conomi Islands, East Blue 

As Luffy stepped up to Coco village, he knew deep in his gut that something had gone wrong. Zoro had tried to dismiss Nami going radio silent as being careful now that she was under scrutiny. Sanji bequeathed him a boot to the head. While Usopp played mum for the bickering pirates, Luffy took point and marched towards the dilapidated village the snail was leading them towards. With overturned houses and it being a ghost town by all appearances, Luffy determined that Arlong was angry. 

They were met by a blue haired woman who was rushing along with a rifle in hand. She aimed this musket at them and demanded their names. 
“My name is Luffy, and I’m going to be king of the-” 

“This is Luffy, we’re bounty hunters looking for Nami.” Zoro interrupted. Sanji took a step back to hide the sack containing Buggy’s thankfully quiet head. 

“What do you have to do with Nami? Are you here to arrest her?” she cocked the hammer and looked down the sight. 

“She’s in our crew. We followed after her so we could take down Arlong.” Luffy explained but that just made her more ferocious.  

“Then you sent her to her death. Arlong is furious. First he loses half his crew, then he carries Nami into the village and demands she hand over all the money she’s collected, then the vicious bastard has the gall to bite her.” 

Sanji stepped up, uncaring of the barrel in his face, “He what!?” he sounded distraught, gripping hard at the twine strap across his chest. 

“He said he was going to give her a new marking, as part of the Arlong Pirates, not as their navigator but their slave. Then he bit into her arm right where the tattoo was.” 

“Tell me something first... was Nami wearing a hat?” Luffy asked intensely, though the rest of the crew looked annoyed at his priorities. 

She looked confused however, “Yeah, a straw hat. She never took it off, not even when he tossed her around or nearly tore her arm off.” 

Sanji decided to speak up again, “Miss, what’s your name?” 

“Nojiko...” 

“Nojiko, where is everyone, did nobody step up for her?” 

“The moment she was brought before us, we came together, never miss Arlong’s role call. Then he demanded her money and people started listening. When he bit her, we went after him with everything we had. He tore us apart but Nami was in danger. I came back for Belle Mere’s gun and I’m going in there to take her back.” 

Zoro decided to step up next, “We’ll handle him. You don’t have the manpower, the skills or the weapons to handle a fishman. Call your people back, no use in getting them killed.” 

“Who the Hell do you people think you are? You think you could handle him?” 

“As a matter of fact,” Usopp intoned, “we got this in the bag, literally.” He reached for Buggy’s head bag and unsealed its contents for Nojiko to see. 

She recoiled and looked disturbed, but then was reassured, “You got Buggy locked up? Then please, get my sister back. She’s all I have left.” 

“We’ll do everything we can for her!” Sanji declared. 

“Point us in the right direction to Arlong and we’ll handle the rest.” Zoro asked, Nojiko nodded to the east towards a large temple, which Zoro locked in on and marched towards. 

Nojiko stopped Luffy before he left, “Why did you ask about a hat, I know she doesn’t normally wear one but...” 

“It’s my treasure. And she always takes care of treasure. As all great pirates do!” he laughed and marched in single file next to Zoro and Usopp. 

“More goddamn PIRATES!” 

The badass moment was hampered by the three crewmates slapping their foreheads in frustration.  

---

Griffith Observatory, NCR Sector 

Lucy, Cooper, Dogmeat and Jeeves were assembled before the entrance to Moldavers compound. As they were let in, grim suspicious faces stared back at her. Cooper looked ready to draw and start firing at the slightest nervous twitch. Then Lucy stepped up and raised the rotting head in her hands. But more than that, all around her were various ghouls who whispered gleefully to the guards. “She’s the one, she saved us!” 

It made their entrance almost too easy. But, she supposed, it was better to enter under a welcome gaze than a suspicious glare. Regardless, she was going to fil in the gaps with Moldaver. She was going to get Vault 4 that power boost. She was going to see her friends and be able to introduce them to her father. 

In the foyer, Moldaver was there to welcome the strange posse. A vault girl, a ghoul, a dog and a robot. Cooper decided to hang back, leaning on a wall with his hat dipped low on his face.  Jeeves meandered off to a series of cables and started poking around. One guard went to stop it, but Moldaver raised a hand. Dogmeat heeled to Lucy’s right, head cocked to the side in curiosity. It wasn’t the wary growl or poised strike she’d seen when it traveled with Wilzig or Cooper before.  

This dog knew Moldaver. 

She rested a hand on the pouch containing the late Wilzig’s head, near the 10mm holstered on her hip. The tranq gun was holstered to the other side. Moldaver raised an eyebrow and nodded approvingly. 

“To business then?” she asked. 

“I’d like to settle some accounts. First of all, a bounty was offered.” 

“A bounty?” 

“Services rendered. You wanted Wilzig and what I presume is the device in his neck, I have it. Seems fitting that I receive a fair wage for a job well- for a job done.” Lucy crossed her arms. 

“Never let it be said I’m a miser. One thousand caps.” She waved forward one of her men who carried a leather satchel. 

“To my escort. That should cover my fee.” She gestured to Cooper, who held out a hand. 

“Won’t say no to an honest cap. But we got answers that need squaring.” he said. As she neared, she faltered a step.

“Mr Howard? COOPER Howard? How... how the hell are you alive? I thought... well obviously atomic radiation caused a mutation but... all this time...” 

"How am I- how the hell are you alive, and why are you still fresh faced and daisy clean? Great, we both live for two hundred years and I got the face of melted cheese."

"Eh, lets be honest Howard, even for a ghoul, you still somehow look attractive. I mean the others, don't tell them, but holy shit! Fist time I came out of... well, first time was a doozy."

"I know, first time i saw a ghoul, near flipped my lid and thought zombies were rising. Then I realised I was looking in a mirror and it was dark."

It was Lucy’s turn to look shocked. THE Cooper Howard that she and her pops used to watch back in the vault. The gunslinger with a big iron on his hip, dog at his side and annihilator of commies! This whole time she had been walking side by side with one of her biggest heroes.  

‘And he sounds exactly like him! And he’s dressed as a cowboy! And oh my god HOW did I not realize that was him until NOW!’ 

The three of them recused themselves to a balcony overseeing the ruins of La City. Lucy kept looking at Cooper while he was staring at Moldaver. 

“So what do you want to know?” she asked, but Lucy remembered her mission. 

“Vault Four is set up to use some brand new technology that could revolutionise the recovery period for the surface.” 

“Surface,” she scoffed, “I forget, even with that suit to remind me, that you lived in those Vaults long enough to forget.”

"What’s that supposed to mean?” Lucy pouted.

“You’ve changed Vaultie, changed utterly. It’s like some terrible beauty reborn in the wasteland.” sniped Cooper. He was fidgeting with a large bullet. 

“You said I look like my mother, and you came for my father. I won’t plead ignorance, I know that some of the Vaults have done... messed up stuff, but what has that got to do with me?” 

“Vault-tec was the greatest hope for so many people in the case of nuclear war. It was also it’s greatest enemy. Even today. I had access to what you held in that head after so long, I couldn’t risk Vault-Tec stopping me now.” 

“OK, let’s stop with the whole build up and reveal here.” Lucy interrupted, “Just tell me it straight. I’ve seen alternate realities and powers beyond comprehension. I’m pretty sure i can grasp corporate America is evil.” 

Both Moldaver and Cooper blinked at that.  Cooper smiled and nodded. Moldaver, however,

“Um, fair enough... wait alternate realities?” 

“Yeah I can communicate with an alternate earth, multiple, actually. No bombs, no wasteland, I don’t think Vault-Tec ever existed.” 

“I, uh, what? Have you cracked from walking through radiation pits or something?” 

“Nope, she tellin’ the truth, saw it with my own eyes.” 

Well, your eyes are rotting, I don’t trust your brain isn’t!” Moldaver snapped, before sighing and rubbing her eyes.  

“Ignoring that hurtful comment, what was it you’re needing the head for?” he asked. 

“It’s for... a cold fusion reactor.” she muttered. 

“Huh, neat.” Lucy smiled, glad her plan’s could be met. 

“See, this sucks. I had this big reveal planned, COLD FUSION! The answer to our prayers and you can literally jump realities to where it already exists. This sucks.” 

“You could go to that reality and bring more back, make it better.” Lucy suggested. Moldaver buried her face in her hands and breathed deeply. Then she peeked up. 

“You promise?” 

“Yup, just need your device to power our teleporter.” 

“OF COURSE YOU HAVE A TELEPORTER! What’s the fucking point...” she waved her hands in the air and stormed back into the observatory. 

---

Arlong Park, Cocoyashi Island, East Blue 

“OK, you guys fight off Arlong, I’ll stay back here.” said Buggy, shoving Luffy forward. Zoro and Sanji squared up against Arlongs remaining lieutenants in the final face off between the fishmen and the Straw Hats. 
“And what, may I ask,” said Sanji, “will you be doing while we fight for our lives?” He swept his foot into kick mode; Zoro readied his remaining sword and Luffy clenched his wrist to ready a punch. 

“I will be with you spirit and offer moral support.” As he said this, the snail on Luffy’s hat began to pump out music. This time nobody seemed to even notice, only start slowly swaying to the flute notes playing and Buggy launched into a song. 

 

“I feel it in my fingers,” he popped off his hands, 

“I feel it in my toes,” he popped off his feet, 

“These motherfuckers mean to harm us,  

and they got to go!” They rushed forward and began trading blows. 

“So come on, get 'em now 
You picked the wrong day to fuck around with my 
Tight crew, oh-oh.” The straw hats paused briefly to stare bewildered at Buggy’s claim but turned around to continue fighting. 

“There's no escaping it 
I can perceive you 
Here's what we're gonna do,” he split apart into a grand display of exuberance. Zoro and Sanji flanked left and right, two fishmen dived in and out of water to cut them off, 

“Me and my boys gonna mess you up,” he gestured to Sanji and Zoro,  

“I’m fighting one” said Zoro, 
“I'm fighting one” said Sanji, 

“Fuck 
My boys are otherwise engaged 
So I'm gonna bring it all myself” 

"Hey, are you going to keep singing or are you actually going to back up those words?” asked Luffy, who was delivering hammer blows to Arlongs gut and tanking shark bites to his arms. 

“Got it, I cast Vicious Mockery, nat twenty, let's go” shouted Buggy, who alunched into the most vtirolic, racist spiel targeting a fishman that drew all attention to him, 

You're a fishfaced motherfucker and nobody likes you (trout!) 
Everybody says "Look how scaly that guy is" 
And that stops you from forming meaningful relationships 
When you were born, everybody thought that you were just a fish in a bowl 
But then the doctor said 
"Wait, this stupid muthafuckin' tiny, short ass goldfish 
Got a tiny, little itty bitty weenie and I hate it" 

"Dude, you can’t say that!” Luffy called out, not even fighting the heavily demoralised fishman captain who was now kneeling on the ground, his mind SHATTERED by the vile lyrics. He was too mad to even move. 

As Luffy used his axe kick to launch Arlong into his temple and bring its heavy structure to bring the whole thing down on everything but his head, Nami recovered enough strength to walk up to the buried Arlong and held a bo staff under his saw nose. 

“His body's just lying there, right? Right?” Nami asked her crew, the other two finished with their fights and their bodies pile driven into the nearest stalls. 

 
“Yes?” asked Zoro, who then realised, “Don't-” 

“Loot that body 
Gotta loot that body now 
Loot that body” sang Nami as she pulled off a key from around Arlongs neck.
“Gotta loot that motherfucker, 
Play that flute when I loot that floppy fish's body” She reared her staff back and smashed the saw nose into a can opener, knocking out a few teeth in the process. 
“Bitch!” 

---

Hazbin Hotel, Hell 

Charlie finally made it home and collapsed against the door. She desperately wanted to find her phone, find Vaggie and curl up under the covers with whatever the chat had for cute animals and scenic shots of nature. ‘Maybe Sanji can do a cooking guide for a Beef Wellington, always wanted to make one of those.” 

But she was ambushed before she even reached the stairs. “Charlie!” an excited Vaggie ran up to her, “We did so well today. We went around to whole bunch of different places. Angel recommended a SM dungeon, got some surprisingly good massages there, Baxter, Goopty and Lipton took us to a factory to build some shit, got a kick ass harpoon gun out of that, then I took us to-sweety are you OK?” she paused when she saw tears leaking out of Charlie’s eyes. 

“Huh, oh, sorry, I'm not crying... I’m just, so relieved you guys made some progress. Team building exercises is great for building camaraderie. I just... I feel like I’ve let them down when it comes to therapy. There’s so many and I don’t have a lot of time and I need to show results but their recovery is so important and-” 

Vaggie held her hand and threaded their fingers together. Charlie paused and looked down at their hands. Vaggie continued to glide and turn her hand, tracing a small pattern in the palm and clasping the whole hand tightly.  

“You’re doing fine. Let’s ask the others in the chat. I heard we’ve made some great progress with the teleporter, maybe we can bring in some new guys, Izuku and Caitlyn might know.” 

“Yeah. Good idea. So how did you end up uniting in the end?” 

“Turf war. I sent them into the pits and they had to fight their way out.” 

“...Vaggie, what the fuck...” 

“Buuuut, it worked, check it out.” It was a sight to see, the formerly antagonistic or isolationist guests were now trading barbs and laughing heartily with one another. Even Husker was going around serving up tall pints to everyone and joking with them. Crymini was chuckling lowly and quickly pawed a pint when Husk wasn’t looking. She took a sip and grimaced when Husk laughed at her misfortune of picking one of three drinks that were non-alcoholic. The other two were served to a zipping around Nifty, who grabbed empty cans and glasses before they hit a surface, and Emberlynn who was sketching a quick drawing of Husk as a dad and Crymini as his wayward daughter. The two subjects reached in and tore the picture in half to Emberlynn’s initial protest and then amusement that they had the same idea. 

Baxter, Loopty and Lipton showcased a redesign of a mech suit based on the power armor max had shown them. Angel was pestering them to build a new gun like the one Cait had. And Pentious was showcasing some of his moves from the fight, using his serpentine body to mimic Luffy’s stretchy powers and wielding a sword like Zoro by holding it in his h mouth. 

“Perfect. They are all perfect.” Charlie gushed, clutching Vaggie to her side. They enjoyed the embrace for only a moment, when suddenly the doorbell rang. Everyone came to a halt, as Charlie walked to the front with Vaggie wielding her new harpoon gun loaded with her spear. As they neared, Alastor suddenly apparated from the shadows and pulled open the door, practically expecting their visitor, as he beamed widely at their reaction. 

“Oh...hello. My name is Emily. I am from Heaven and I’m here to see the hotel.” The glowing visage of white dimmed to reveal the tiny figure of a seraphim with grey skin and many wings protruding from her back. “It’s a pleasure to meet you all. I look forward to seeing how the hotel works” she smiled.  

A few faceplanted. Others ran screaming to their rooms.

 

Notes:

That song is a damn ear worm, I haven't been able to get it out of my head since first hearing it and now I can't stop thinking about it being sung in One Piece.
For those interested: Perception Check - Tom Cardy