tumblr requests!!

by secondwatcher

Summary:

A collection where I post the fanfictions I've written on request!

You can request any prompt on my tumblr, @caramelarrowswife.

Chapter 1: All Being Fine

Summary:

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Dark Cacao Cookie and Pure Vanilla Cookie have been friends for a very, very long time. So long of a time that, perhaps, feelings may have sprouted from them..

Sometimes, all you need for a confession is an intimate experience (such as war) and irritatingly loud friends.
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Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: "Uhm, hi. Here, take care. *drops Purecacao prompt and runs* Pure Vanilla proposing to Dark Cacao after a battle thanks to Hollyberry and Golden Cheese suggesting it. Bonus if Dark Cacao’s watchers are witnessing it in subdued shock and anticipation"

Dark Cacao Cookie was never one for dramatics. What needed to be done was done in silence; who needed a whole show if it could be done in solitary? Extra theatrics were left to his more extroverted friends. It was one of the reasons he enjoyed battle.. cold and harsh reality, weapon against weapon, blood wild and free.

Speaking of battle, Dark Cacao had just returned from one. He had fought alongside his three dearest friends, and they had come together to discuss what had happened and how it could be prevented in the future.

Hollyberry Cookie and Golden Cheese Cookie had been having a bit of a friendly banter when the archer noticed their friend Pure Vanilla, the kind-hearted healer who insisted on accompanying the group during the wars, staring wistfully at Dark Cacao.

A look at Hollyberry confirmed Golden Cheese’s suspicions; he was pining yet again. It annoyed her endlessly; Pure Vanilla was blind, yes, but surely he could see how soft the stoic king became around him..?

Enough was enough, she decided.

With a mischievous smirk, Golden Cheese made her way over to Pure Vanilla, her steps as quiet and nimble as a cat’s. Pure Vanilla flinched slightly when she was next to him all of a sudden; he had not heard her approach.

“When are you finally making a move?” Golden Cheese said bluntly.

A red flush appeared on Pure Vanilla’s cheeks “A-ah, my dear friend, you misunderstand-”

“I’m not misunderstanding a thing. You’re in love with that man, and he’s in love with you - you’re just idiots, both of you, for not noticing. If you’re not going to walk up there to tell him about your painfully obvious feelings, I’ll do it for you,” Golden Cheese said, not unkindly.

“...” Pure Vanilla hesitated for a moment. He would rather stab himself than have to come to terms with the butterflies in his stomach, but to have Golden Cheese do it..? No, he would rather tell Dark Cacao himself.

Pure Vanilla stood up, both encouraged and discouraged by the cheers that came from the two women behind him. He could do this. He could be brave.

Pure Vanilla sat next to Dark Cacao. Immediately, he felt a soft throb of pain on his arm and leg - the warrior-king had not gotten his injuries treated yet. How typical.

“Let me heal you, Cacao,” Pure Vanilla said softly. A yellow aura surrounded his pale, slender hands as he took one of Dark Cacao’s. The healer’s hands trembled slightly; he was not used to the weather in the Dark Cacao Kingdom.

“It is unnecessary, truly,” Dark Cacao protested, despite knowing this was a battle he couldn’t win. “Hollyberry Cookie is in far more dire need of assistance than I am.”

“Hollyberry let her wounds be treated directly after battle, my dead,” Pure Vanilla murmured, before drily adding; “With a lot less of a struggle, might I say..”

“Ah..” Dark Cacao said wryly. “I suppose I cannot convince you otherwise, then..?”

Pure Vanilla smiled and did his work in silence. They both knew Dark Cacao secretly enjoyed the feeling of soft hands against his own.. his pride prevented him from admitting it.

After the umpteenth shiver from Pure Vanilla, Dark Cacao removed his thick cloak to wrap it around the other’s shoulders instead. Pure Vanilla murmured a soft ‘thank you’ before continuing his previous work.

Pure Vanilla’s hands stayed on Dark Cacao’s, even after all Dark Cacao’s wounds closed. It was noticed by both of the rulers; how could they not?

Dark Cacao slowly lifted Pure Vanilla’s mouth. He didn’t kiss Pure Vanilla’s knuckles, exactly, but his lips brushed over them - it was more than enough for the healer.

“Marry me,” Pure Vanilla said breathlessly.

It came as a surprise to both Dark Cacao and Pure Vanilla. The healer quickly recoiled, cringing into himself. Oh, for Heaven’s sake…

“I-I mean- that’s-” Pure Vanilla hid his face in his hands. A shame - had he used his Orchid to watch Dark Cacao’s face, he would have seen a slight blush.

After a second or three, Pure Vanilla felt two strong hands wrap around his wrists, pulling them from his face. He ignored Golden Cheese’s and Hollyberry’s hushed whispers; he couldn’t bring himself to care about them at that moment.

“It would be an honour,” Dark Cacao said quietly.

Pure Vanilla froze, before an uncertain smile appeared on his face. “Well. That’s- good, then.”

“Yes.” A rare chuckle escaped from Dark Cacao’s lips. “Yes, it is.”

When Dark Cacao looked up from Pure Vanilla’s face, he was met with the sight of Caramel Arrow Cookie, the Second Watcher and Crunchy Chip Cookie, all wearing matching shocked expressions.

Oh. It seemed the hushed whispers he had ignored earlier were less of victory and more of a warning, then…

Chapter 2: A Change Of Scenery

Summary:

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Dark Cacao Cookie and Pure Vanilla Cookie's schedules finally lined up, and they went for a walk for the first time in ages. One of the beautiful forests in the Vanilla Kingdom is a wonderful place for this!

Unfortunately, their luck was working against them; Pure Vanilla's staff wasn't available. Whatever would they do..?

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Domestic fluff

Prompt: "Ohhh I have a purecacao prompt: Pure Vanilla and Dark Cacao are enjoying a scenic walk, but Vanilla can’t see the beautiful sights (maybe he forgot his staff back home), so Cacao describes it to him while they walk.."

Dark Cacao Cookie and his lover, Pure Vanilla Cookie, had been walking through one of the forests in the Vanilla Kingdom for an hour or two when Dark Cacao began to notice something strange.

Pure Vanilla’s hand was firmly around Dark Cacao’s wrist; not in a hurtful way, but.. in a mildly anxious way. It took the stoic king a minute or two to realise what was happening.

“My dear…” Dark Cacao began slowly, “Where is your staff?”

“Ah.. you caught me, Cao. The eye needed repairing.. something that hurts tremendously if it’s done while I am bonded to it.” Pure Vanilla shot him a shaky smile, his mismatching eyes unfocused. As selfish as it was, Dark Cacao was pleased to be looking at his husband’s eyes again - every time that damned staff was near, his beautiful eyes would be closed.

“Why did you accompany me here if the sight is lost to you..?” Dark Cacao said, his voice barely more than a low mutter.

“You are so busy… I feared a chance for a walk might be far in the future if I didn’t grab this chance,” Pure Vanilla said apologetically. “I can retake this path when it is fixed, so I know what I’ve missed.”

“Hm,” Dark Cacao grunted.

They remained silent for a few minutes, before the swordsman began to speak again.

“A river to your left.. a soda river, I believe. Sugar carps swim in it, trying to go against the stream,” Dark Cacao said.

“Pardon me?” Pure Vanilla looked towards the sound of his voice, raising his eyebrows.

“We’re about to cross the river on a stone bridge.. moss is growing in the openings between the bricks. A frog just jumped into the river from the left edge.. it saw a libelle.”

Pure Vanilla’s smile widened slightly when he realised what Dark Cacao was doing and he hummed softly, a quiet invitation to continue.

“Trees.. a lot of them. They look like spruce trees to me, but the leaves are so light.. we don’t have those in the Dark Cacao Kingdom. You’ll have to tell me when you regain your sight,” Dark Cacao murmured. “There’s moss covering the forest floor, a lot of it. Flowers are blooming from the moss, yellow ones.. you’d like them.”

This went on for about an hour. Dark Cacao hadn’t spoken this much and decades, and his vocal chords were starting to become a little sore… when his voice turned from its usual low and gruff tone to an actual hoarse one, Pure Vanilla squeezed Dark Cacao’s gloved hand with a small smile.

“Thank you,” Pure Vanilla murmured. “Truly.”

Dark Cacao lowered his head with a quiet hum, hiding the slight flush that had crawled up his neck. Despite the fact the healer was technically blind, Dark Cacao always felt like he could see right through him.

Finally, the moss turned into grass and the trees into hedges; they had reached the end of the forest and were entering one of the villages in the Vanilla Kingdom.

Dark Cacao moved to pull his hand out of Pure Vanilla’s grasp, but a small squeeze made him reconsider.. whatever, who really cared. Dark Cacao’s face felt hot and he hated it.

“Your Majesty!”

Crunchy Chip Cookie.

The witches truly did hate Dark Cacao, then.

“Sire! Lady Hollyberry has been looking for you, you’re late to the Counsel!” Crunchy Chip exclaimed, obnoxiously loud.

“Ah.. I’m certain she’ll forgive us,” Pure Vanilla said, smiling kindly.

He hadn’t noticed yet.

“Lead the way, Crunchy Chip,” Dark Cacao commanded, his voice a low grumble.

He hadn’t noticed yet.

“Aye, m’lord!” Crunchy Chip saluted.

Suddenly, the Commander’s yellow eyes fell on the painfully obvious connection between the two rulers. They were holding hands. Holding hands, and the warrior-king looked like an eleven-year-old girl with her first boyfriend.

He noticed.

“Not a word,” Dark Cacao mouthed in silence, earning him a slightly nervous nod from the commander.

Crunchy Chip turned on his heel and led the two royals out of the forest - his pace was just a little bit faster than it was before.

Caramel Arrow needed to see this.

Chapter 3: Under The Bandage

Summary:

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Careless.

Dark Cacao Cookie had been so, so careless. How could he allow a Liquorice monster to sneak so close?
─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: Description of wound (not detailed)

Genre: Hurt/Comfort (Mild angst)

Prompt: "Hmm.... cacao getting injured pretty bad after a battle and pv helping him recover? :3"

Dark Cacao Cookie sat in the medical facilities of the Citadel. Healers and personal guards alike were fussing over his health, scrambling to and fro for bandages and healing herbs and whatnot.

The king himself, however, wanted nothing more than to lock himself in his chamber and remain in solitude for at least a day.. a Liquorice Monster catching him by surprise was embarrassing enough, did they have to act like he was just diagnosed with a terminal illness?

Was it because the very foundation of the Dark Cacao Kingdom rested upon his shoulders and his death would inevitably cause the downfall of every citizen? Maybe. Dark Cacao Cookie didn’t feel like thinking about it.

Dark Cacao Cookie studied the entrance to the small hospital. No guards in sight.. even if there were, no-one had the authority to defy his direct orders. Being the highest in command had its perks.

It was decided, then. Dark Cacao Cookie stood up, conspicuously slinking through the medical bay. He ignored the exasperated shouts of the healers behind him.

The entrance, at last.

Freedom.

“Cacao, what in the world are you doing?!”

Or not.

Dark Cacao Cookie turned around, suddenly face-to-face with Pure Vanilla Cookie, the king and all-loving monarch of the Vanilla kingdom. The monarch possessed an incredible amount of healing magic.. but why was he here , instead of in his own kingdom of tree-huggers and sheep-coddlers?

“Pure Vanilla Cookie.” Dark Cacao Cookie’s voice was devoid of any emotion. “What brings you here?”

“You!” Pure Vanilla Cookie fussed. “Look at you- look at your arm? Oh, how could one possibly think of themself fit to leave the medical wing, looking like that..?”

Dark Cacao Cookie frowned. “I look fine.”

Pure Vanilla Cookie exhaled patiently. His eyes were closed, but the eye on his orchid-like staff was frowning at Dark Cacao Cookie unhappily.

“Cacao, please,” Pure Vanilla Cookie murmured. “Let me tend to you.. let me heal you, just like the old days.”

The stoic king hesitated, before relenting with a small sigh. His shoulders drooped slightly as he allowed himself to be led to his bedroom.

Dark Cacao Cookie only truly realised the mistake he had made when Pure Vanilla Cookie unwrapped the messily done bandages around his arm. A gasp came from the healer and Dark Cacao Cookie forced himself not to recoil.

“A bite!” Pure Vanilla Cookie yelped. “Cacao, it took a bite out of you!”

“It’ll heal,” Dark Cacao Cookie muttered unconvincingly.

The monarch took his husband’s hands in his own, giving them a small squeeze.

“Dark Chocolate Cacao Cookie. You are the most wonderful, stubborn, impossible cookie I have ever met,” Pure Vanilla Cookie said seriously. “Surely you must’ve seen the severity of this situation.”

Dark Cacao Cookie shrugged helplessly. How could this be happening? He had seen friends die in battle, he had led his men into war with a raised sword. He had been hurt and he had killed - how could this healer have such a big effect on him?

Pure Vanilla Cookie stripped the rest of Dark Cacao Cookie’s bandages off with an unhappy grumble, his eyebrows furrowing in concentration as he allowed healing magic to stream through his hands into the wound.

Dark Cacao Cookie suppressed a shiver when the cold touch of the monarch on his left side touched the sensitive sides of his open wound. He forced himself to straighten his back.. enough weakness had been shown, it was time to ignore the pain.

A small grunt escaped him nonetheless when slender fingers prodded in the raw flesh. Pure Vanilla Cookie murmured a small apology, but continued his work; Dark Cacao Cookie exhaled slowly when the pain was gradually replaced by a cool numbness.

Pure Vanilla Cookie retracted his hands after he was done, standing up from the bedside. Before he could leave Dark Cacao Cookie’s room, the latter caught his wrist, stopping him from walking off.

“Vanilla-” Dark Cacao Cookie began, but he cut himself off. “..thank you.”

Pure Vanilla Cookie smiled at him. “Any time.”

Chapter 4: New Talents

Summary:

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Dark Cacao Cookie and Pure Vanilla Cookie were both respected and honoured in their talents. A king who could wield a sword like no other, and a healer that could mend broken bones within minutes…

Yet, there was one recurring problem in the Dark Cacao Kingdom; a lack of medical herbs. Learning a little magic never hurt anyone, right..?
─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Domestic fluff

Prompt: "hiii! i really enjoy reading your purecacao fanfiction you’re one of the only people on tumblr feedjng me right now ☹️ your work is amazing!! also uhhh sneaky request perhaps a purecacao fic where they both try and train each other in their respective fields? it would be really cool to see the contrast between them, warrior, healer etc also it could be some cute bonding time! thanks and keep writing :3"

PART 1 - HEALING

 

“Your Majesty!” A servant came rushing into the king’s office, startling the latter into looking up. “Your visitor has arrived, sire! He is earlier than expected-”

“Of course he is,” Dark Cacao Cookie said with a sigh, rising to his feet. “He always is. Lead the way.”

The servant nodded nervously, having to jog slightly to keep up with the long strides the latter took.

The servant and his master parted ways only when they arrived at the grand courtyard of the Citadel, where a massive cacao tree grew. It was both the biggest and oldest tree that grew in the entire kingdom; it had served as a primary income of cacao beans for many centuries.

There, under the shade of the tree, waited a figure that stood out against the cold and dark of the Dark Cacao Kingdom. His hair was blonde, his robes as white as snow and his cape a cheerful golden brown.

The newcomer’s eyes, opened just now, appeared to be mismatched; one as blue as a clear sky, and the other as yellow as the sun that shone in it.

“Dark Cacao Cookie, my friend!” Pure Vanilla Cookie said happily as the taller approached. “Oh, what a pleasure it is to see you healthy!”

“I wouldn’t describe my current state as ‘healthy’,” Dark Cacao hummed in reply. “These are the hardest months of the year… we cannot afford to waste resources on small injuries, even if said injuries start to infect.”

“Oh.” Pure Vanilla was silent for a second, before smiling again. “Well, my dear, how about I teach you a little trick? Everyone can learn magic, and the only resource it takes is your patience!”

“Yes, because I have so much of that,” Dark Cacao said drily. He removed his left glove anyway.

Pure Vanilla sucked air in sharply. The injury wasn’t large and could definitely be treated, but he could imagine the pain it brought the king..

“Accidental stab wound,” Dark Cacao murmured. “Held my blade the wrong way when sharpening my sword. It cut my palm.”

Pure Vanilla tsk-ed, holding Dark Cacao’s hand in his own. “Watch very carefully, and I’ll show you what you must do.”

Dark Cacao nodded, trying to focus on the magic and not on the fact those pretty eyes had closed again. “I’m listening.”

“Hold your hand above the injury, but do not touch it! I want you to imagine the energy streaming from your very core to your torso, to your arms, to your palm. Imagine using the energy to heal the wound, imagine your body fighting to close again.”

Dark Cacao grunted in reply, all his focus on the tingling of magic he could feel in his palm.

“Very good.. and now, for the final step..”

Dark Cacao’s eyes sharpened, fully prepared to do whatever was asked of him-

“Say ‘abrakadabra’.”

“No,” Dark Cacao deadpanned. “I’m not an idiot, Pure Vanilla. I know that is not how it works.”

“Worth a shot,” Pure Vanilla giggled, his eyes squinting in amusement. Dark Cacao felt his anger seep away. Damn that healer.

When Dark Cacao started repeating the earlier (valid) steps, he was mildly amazed to find his wound actually closing up. He knew Pure Vanilla was an extremely powerful healer, but he wasn’t aware of his teaching ability.

“..thank you,” Dark Cacao said, the corners of his mouth raised ever-so-slightly.

“Anytime, my friend!” Pure Vanilla said, beaming with happiness at the small smile he had been graced with.

 

PART 2 - FIGHTING

Dark Cacao had promised he’d repay Pure Vanilla when the latter left for his homeland, and he was a man to his word. So, here he was, on the training field, pulling out the old practice dummies.

Pure Vanilla sat on a nearby bench, watching him prepare the area. Sure, the healer was very innocent, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t appreciate his partner’s nice physique as he worked.

“These,” Dark Cacao said after he was done, tapping the eyes, the neck and the torso, “Are the best places to hit an enemy. A stab or punch to the eyes will momentarily disoriented and blind them, giving you a chance for a new attack. The neck is very important, too; a well-placed stab through the vocal cords or the windpipe, and you’ve won your battle.”

Pure Vanilla nodded, studying the dummy in front of him with a slightly tilted head. His orchid-like staff rested on the bench beside him, its eye focused on the explanation up front.

“There are multiple weak spots on the torso,” Dark Cacao continued. “The middle of the chest might seem logical, but it can be very hard to reach the heart; if you do it exactly right, your weapon might slip through the ribs, but it’s unlikely.”

Pure Vanilla hummed softly, indicating he was listening. It had been ages since he heard his lover talk so much and so passionately about something; they both knew Pure Vanilla wouldn’t need this information all too much, but it was nice to listen to Dark Cacao’s rant.

“Instead of going for the heart, go for the groin or abdomen. You, being a healer, know where the vital organs are - when faced with danger, always aim for those.” Dark Cacao threw Pure Vanilla the wooden sword trainees would use. “Go ahead, give me your worst.”

Pure Vanilla raised his eyebrows. “Am I not to practice on the dummy?”

“Ah, I doubt you can do much harm with that sword. I have a protective layer under my hanbok.”

“Hm.. very well, then,” Pure Vanilla said, standing up. He circled Dark Cacao for a few seconds, like he had seen the latter do so many times in battle, before striking. The blow was easily deflected.

Pure Vanilla’s eyes narrowed. Dark Cacao wasn’t going easy on him, then. Well, if that was the game they were playing…

Pure Vanilla lunged again, aiming for the other’s stomach - only, at the last moment, he changed his direction and went for the back of Dark Cacao’s knees. The usually stoic king let out a yelp as his legs gave in.

Dark Cacao clearly hadn’t expected such a strategy from a beginner, his eyes wide in surprise as he was knocked to the floor. He only realised what was happening when he felt Pure Vanilla sit on him to hold him down.

With a quiet (and very rare) chuckle, Dark Cacao pushed him off. “Okay, okay, enough, we’re not wrestling.”

Dark Cacao stood up, straightening his clothes before looking back at a proud Pure Vanilla, and he wasn’t shocked to feel pleased instead of angry.

“That was a very nice attack,” Dark Cacao admitted. “But if I had known what you were doing, I would’ve stopped you-!”

Pure Vanilla laughed, a joyful sound. He picked his staff again, throwing his wooden sword at Dark Cacao’s feet. “If you say so, my dear.. I can see you didn’t expect me to have any talent, hm?”

“That’s not- I did not-” Dark Cacao protested.

“I know,” Pure Vanilla chuckled. “I’m only joking..”

Standing on his toes to reach Dark Cacao’s cheek, Pure Vanilla surprised him for the second time that day; a small kiss was pressed to his face.

Despite the cold around them, Dark Cacao could feel a warmth rising to his cheeks…

Chapter 5: Divided Hearts

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Dark Cacao Cookie and Pure Vanilla Cookie’s opinions on Dark Choco Cookie’s banishment are quite the opposite. Dark Cacao is weary and sad, but accepting. And Pure Vanilla?

Pure Vanilla is angry.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Angst

Prompt: "Hiii I love your purecacao stories, could we maybe have a little angst story, maybe Dark Cacao and Pure Vanilla get into a bad disagreement, but it’s okay bc they make up at the end :D"

“Our son!” Pure Vanilla’s voice was louder than it usually was, louder than Dark Cacao had ever heard it be. “Our only son! How dare you give him up like that?!”

“You must calm down,” Dark Cacao hissed, his eyes narrowing. “He attacked me - his father, his king! Did you truly believe his actions would have no consequences?”

“You could’ve fought for him. You could’ve talked to him. But no, all your time and energy is wasted on your duties.” Pure Vanilla’s voice cracked.

Pure Vanilla was far too focused on the uncharacteristic anger that pulsed through his veins to notice Dark Cacao’s thinly veiled warning. He was a calm healer, a kind king, he was calm-

Dark Choco’s voice echoed through his head, his agonised scream as his father crumbled to the ground. Dark Cacao’s voice, deep and booming, commanding his son to go far away and never return.

“I cannot believe you. Twenty years down the drain.. ruined, because you couldn’t listen to him.” Pure Vanilla’s voice wasn’t angry any longer. It was disbelieving.

“Pure Vanilla Cookie, you must watch your words! You must be out of your mind to speak to me like this!” Dark Cacao took a step forward, his voice louder than he had meant for it to be.

Pure Vanilla flinched. Dark Cacao recoiled, the anger seeping out of his body as he watched the flash of fear in his husband’s body.

“Vanilla.. you cannot truly believe I intended to hit-?” Dark Cacao whispered.

He was cut off by Pure Vanilla shouldering past him, striding towards the door. “Why don’t you speak with your advisors? You seem to enjoy their company more than that of your own family’s.”

Dark Cacao was left speechless.

 

---

 

A minute or ten later, a soft knock was heard on Pure Vanilla’s door. The healer had been alone until his anger subsided, and was left feeling hollow and tired. His eyes were closed and his face was turned to the floor as he murmured out a quiet ‘ enter’.

Dark Cacao stepped into the room, sitting next to Pure Vanilla without a word. He put one arm on the healer’s back and, when the latter leaned into his touch, wrapped the other around his torso.

“I… apologise,” Dark Cacao whispered, closing his eyes. “I shouldn’t have shouted at you. You were right, of course.. you always are.”

“No,” Pure Vanilla sniffled, burying his head in Dark Cacao’s clothes. “Attacking a member of the royal family, especially the king.. a good punishment is indeed-”

A muffled sob into Dark Cacao’s chest, and Pure Vanilla stopped speaking to instead cling to his husband.

“My boy.. Choco..”

Dark Cacao held the healer close, rubbing his back in what he hoped to be a comforting gesture. A single tear rolled down his cheek.

“I’m sorry.. I’m so sorry,” Dark Cacao whispered into Pure Vanilla’s hair as his hanbok stained with the healer’s tears.

He wasn’t sure if he was talking to himself, his husband or his son.

This was fine - this would be alright. Tomorrow, or maybe the day after, Dark Choco would realise his mistake. He would know his father would forgive him if he tried his best.. he would come back to the Citadel, he would return to his fathers.

Dark Cacao was hopeful enough to believe he would even leave that wretched group, the Cookies of Darkness. Dark Choco would know they had made him do it, he would realise he was meant to be with his family, with his people, with his kingdom.

Dark Cacao could wait. He could wait until tomorrow, or the day after that, or the day after that. He could wait, and Pure Vanilla could too.

They could be patient.

Chapter 6: Friends Being Foes

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

The new Heir to the Dark Cacao Throne had been born; a small warrior with the name Dark Choco Cookie.

It had taken a few days of convincing the very paranoid father, but the Ancient Heroes were finally allowed to visit the little boy.. and by the Witches, did the little boy enjoy the attention.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Tooth-Rotting Fluff

Prompt: "I’m sorry if youre sick and tired of the purecacao/Dark Cacao promps but could I request ancients being invited to the Dark Cacao Kingdom for Choco’s birth/bakening(?) and they all absolutely fall inlove with that little bugger? With some (not so subtle) Purecacao in the background? Maybe PV adoring Choco to the point of it bordering on fatherly love and Cacao getting so so flustered over it 33"

The group of five made their way towards Dark Cacao Cookie’s bedroom; the warrior-king made sure he arrived at the cradle first, but this didn’t stop Hollyberry Cookie from getting a hold on the baby first.

“Look at you! You look just like your old man!” Hollyberry said, grinning ear to ear. She held Dark Choco up as if he was a rare gem that needed to be studied in daylight.

Dark Cacao’s hands twitched and he smiled tightly. “Why don’t we put him back to bed-”

Dark Choco babbled something incomprehensible, chubby little hands grabbing at Hollyberry’s face. The queen let out a loud chuckle, handing the baby over to White Lily Cookie.

The gentle lady looked at the small child with curiosity and wonder.

“Hello, small one..” she murmured, softly caressing Dark Choco’s cheek with her thumb. He made small sounds, grabbing for the lily on her head.

 White Lily smiled softly, handing the fragile child over to Golden Cheese Cookie - who was a little less careful.

Hello there, tiny man,” Golden Cheese cooed. “Oh, look at you, reaching for the shinies - you want that? You wanna have my spear?”

Dark Cacao barely stifled a scream when Golden Cheese flew higher, towards the ceiling, with his baby in her arms . The winged queen laughed loudly at the sheer panic in his eyes.

“Don’t stress it, grandpa!” She said teasingly. “We don’t want to get your blood levels too high!”

“My blood levels are fine! Get down right this instant!” Dark Cacao shouted, his voice a pitch higher than usually. “I’m not joking, Golden Cheese!”

“You never are,” Golden Cheese pouted. “May you be more fun than your daddy, my little treasure..”

Dark Cacao sighed in relief as Dark Choco was brought down again, holding his hands out for his child - until the baby was taken by Pure Vanilla.

Very well, then. Dark Cacao could trust his small son in the hands of a capable man. A man that had caressed his skin at night, a man that had healed his wounds with the tenderness of a lover. Pure Vanilla would be sure to keep his boy safe-

The healer threw Dark Choco into the air, at least four feet towards the ceiling. Dark Cacao could not silence his scream this time as he shouldered his friends aside to catch his (now loudly giggling) baby.

“You’re all mad!” Dark Cacao whisper-shouted. “Vanilla, what the hell?!”

“We do this to Vanillian children,” Pure Vanilla said, a little puzzled about his friend’s extreme reaction. “With a Kingdom high in the sky, babies should learn to overcome a fear of heights immediately after birth.”

“My Kingdom is safely on the ground!” Dark Cacao looked like he might actually get a heart attack. “Pure Vanilla, Dark Choco should under no circumstance be thrown into the air like- like a- I cannot think of a single thing that should be thrown into the air!”

“Baby birds?” Golden Cheese suggested.

Dark Cacao jerked his head to her direction. “What?!”

“Nevermind.” She hovered down to his level, watching as Dark Cacao held his son close to his chest. “He really does look like you, you know. Oh, I just know he’s going to have the exact same grumpy expression!~”

Dark Choco giggled as both Hollyberry and Golden Cheese stared at him with matching grins. Pure Vanilla chose to stand by Dark Cacao’s side, later followed by White Lily as he stared lovingly at the tiny critter.

“May I hold him one more time?” Pure Vanilla murmured. “I won’t do anything bad, I promise.”

Dark Cacao hesitated, but when his eyes met those mismatched ones, he knew it was over for him. He never had been able to say ‘no’ to the kind-hearted healer, after all.

Pure Vanilla held Dark Choco in his arms, murmuring soft words the others couldn’t hear. While the new-born cookie couldn’t understand them, he found them mighty entertaining, and-

“Appa!” Dark Choco babbled. "Pap a -!"

A flush crawled up Pure Vanilla’s face, but he wasn’t nearly as red as Dark Cacao was. The king stepped forward, reaching to take his son again. “Okay, that’s enough-”

Dark Choco let out a loud cry, clinging to Pure Vanilla’s white gown with one hand and Dark Cacao’s hanbok with the other. Dark Cacao tried to pry those little fingers off of his clothes, but Dark Choco held on with a vice-like grip.

“Oh, he really is like you!” Hollyberry beamed. “Do you remember when we were children, and your father tried to take that raggedy plushie you loved so much-”

Dark Cacao kicked her shin, hard. It did not take away the fact he was now face-to-face with Pure Vanilla.

“Well, his Royal Highness has spoken,” Pure Vanilla teased, not unkindly. “Brood no longer, my king, for your new partner has arrived!”

Dark Cacao let out a laugh that bordered on hysteria, his face growing redder. He wished the ground would swallow him whole.

“Perhaps Dark Choco remembers Pure Vanilla’s face from all the times you’ve drawn him?” Golden Cheese said.

A look of betrayal was sent her way by Dark Cacao. “The paintings were a secret.”

Pure Vanilla raised an eyebrow and his smile widened. Had he tried to look mischievous, he failed miserably; love and adoration streamed through his very being. “I’d like to see those, Cao.”

Dark Cacao let out a low, embarrassed groan.

He never should’ve brought them here.

Chapter 7: Jealousy, Jealousy

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Dark Cacao Cookie had recently begun spending a lot of time with his treacherous advisor, Affogato Cookie. The mage seemed to be by his side for every small decision, in every meeting…

Pure Vanilla Cookie was not happy.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: "Hiii I love your writing it’s no nice, don’t know if your tired of the purecacao request or not but would we maybe have pure vanilla get jealous over someone getting to close to Cacao?"

“Oh, but my Liege!” Affogato Cookie protested as he walked alongside his king. He had to walk fast to keep up with Dark Cacao Cookie’s strides. “Are we certain the Vanillians can be trusted? How safe is it to go with a mere pack of two warriors, including yourself?”

“”Can the Vanillians be trusted’?” Dark Cacao repeated. “Do you hear yourself, Affogato Cookie? Tell me, how often do you ask if cream wolves can fly?”

Affogato’s skin turned a shade darker. You’re going to pay for that.

“I know Pure Vanilla Cookie well. He respects the law of hospitality more than anything, and he would rather perish than bring harm to a guest,” Dark Cacao said.

Finally outside, the pair made their way to the carriage that would bring them to the Vanilla Kingdom. Dark Cacao shot a glance at Affogato.

“You know,” the warrior-king said. “You didn’t have to follow me all the way here.”

“Why not, my liege?” Affogato smiled a sickly sweet smile, “I’m coming with you, after all.”

Pure Vanilla Cookie had been in a wonderful mood all day - that is to say, a more wonderful mood than he usually already had. He had been smiling relentlessly all day, and when a friend asked what was up with him, his smile would widen and he’d answer cryptically.

Dark Cacao Cookie was a very busy man, everyone knew that. It brought all the more excitement when he used the little time he had to visit the Vanilla Kingdom!

Trumpets sounded, indicating Dark Cacao’s arrival. Pure Vanilla walked outside; he might’ve been as calm as always on the outside, but on the inside, he was boiling with excitement.

The monarch made sure he was first to see Dark Cacao step out of the royal carriage, his face radiating joy at seeing his dear friend again. His smile widened slightly when the king was followed with Crunchy Chip Cookie, Dark Cacao’s loyal and friendly commander. His smile faltered ever-so-slightly when he saw Affogato Cookie exit the carriage.

Pure Vanilla’s smile was back as fast as it had fallen, and he stepped forward with open arms to welcome the newcomers from their long journey.

“My friends!” Pure Vanilla beamed. “What a pleasure to have you all here! If you could all follow me to the main hall-”

He was cut off by Affogato, who cleared his throat loudly. “If you could pardon me, your Grace? The journey was harsh and tedious on sore bones and I’d like to be directed to a guest room.”

Pure Vanilla was taken aback for a few seconds, blinking a few times. “Oh. Yes, I see.. very well! Follow me to the guest rooms, please!”

Dark Cacao matched Pure Vanilla’s pace on the way there, leaning down a little to whisper in his ear.

“I apologise for his behavior,” Dark Cacao muttered. “He gets a little bossy, at times. I’m afraid I’ve been letting him get away with too much..”

Pure Vanilla’s smile tightened slightly. With how much have you been letting him get away?

“I understand,” the healer said. “I’m pleased you’ve finally come here, Cacao. I missed you.”

Dark Cacao smiled, a small but rare thing. “And I you.”

Pure Vanilla was many things. He was kind and compassionate, but also intelligent and compassionate. He was loving and fierce when protecting his friends.

If there was one thing he was not, it was jealous. Pure Vanilla Cookie was not a jealous man. He just wasn’t.

And yet…

And yet, what was this feeling coiling in his gut? This feeling that gnawed at his insides everytime Affogato’s hand rested on Dark Cacao’s shoulder for just a little too long? The feeling that only grew when night fell?

Dark Cacao spent most of his time with Pure Vanilla, and the monarch knew it, but he just couldn’t shake off the annoyance at the smug and poisonous smirks Affogato sent him throughout the evening.

He had enough when Affogato made Dark Cacao chuckle. Pure Vanilla approached them, his smile tight and not at all convincing. He took Dark Cacao’s hand, squeezing it softly.

“My love? Will you spend the night in my bedroom, just like the old days? I miss your warmth at night,” Pure Vanilla said, sighing with a twinge of dramatics.

His words had the desired effect; Dark Cacao looked mildly surprised and very much pleased to do exactly that. Affogato, on the other hand, looked like he was about to call Pure Vanilla something he shouldn’t.

“I would be honoured,” Dark Cacao murmured, pressing a soft kiss to Pure Vanilla’s knuckles.

Leaning forward so his words could not be heard by anyone else, he continued, “Are you alright? You seem a little off.”

“Oh, quite,” Pure Vanilla said, smiling at the seething advisor over Dark Cacao’s shoulder, “Just.. missing my husband .”

Chapter 8: A Night Like No Other

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

If there was one thing Dark Cacao Cookie hated, it was dancing. An unnecessary skill, meant to charm guests and subjects. It was pathetic.

Unfortunately for him, the word ‘no’ seemed to disappear from Dark Cacao’s vocabulary when it came to Pure Vanilla Cookie.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Tooth-Rotting Fluff

Prompt: "If your still open to requests then maybe pure vanilla teaching dark cacao to ballroom dance? :DD"

Dark Cacao Cookie and Pure Vanilla Cookie sat together in the large garden of the Vanilla Kingdom. The moon was high in the sky, and stars decorated the dark sky as night fell over Earthbread. Dark Cacao felt oddly at peace, more at peace than he had felt in months.

His eyes were closed as he leaned back into the bench, exhaling quietly. His muscles slowly untensed… if you were to ask him why, he would swear on his life that Pure Vanilla did something to him, put something in the drink he didn’t have, and not his own mind automatically relaxing in the kind healer’s presence.

The peace was nerve-wrecking. Any moment something would happen, and Dark Cacao knew it. No evening should be this uneventful. Any moment now, he’d have to jump into action to save Pure Vanilla and himself. An attack, a murder, an assassination, all of the above-

“My dear.. may I have this dance from you?”

There it was. A fate worse than all three.

Dark Cacao cracked an eye open to find Pure Vanilla standing in front of him, holding out a hand expectantly. His orchid-like staff laid abandoned on the bench.

“I don’t dance,” Dark Cacao said.

“Aw, please?” Pure Vanilla pouted. “For me..?”

Both of Dark Cacao’s eyes were open now, and his back straightened. His brows were furrowed and he opened his mouth to reject the offer.

“..if you insist,” Dark Cacao said instead. Damn it.

Pure Vanilla squealed in joy, tugging the larger warrior up. It took him exactly ten seconds to realise Dark Cacao had no idea what he was doing.

“..you do know how to dance, don’t you?” Pure Vanilla asked.

“It’s a completely useless skill!” Dark Cacao said defensively. “Useless in battle, useless in public! I’ll never need to dance to survive, training is a much better use of my time-”

He was cut off by a soft chuckle. Pure Vanilla seemed very amused by his heated protests, and Dark Cacao hated how not-angry that made him. If he could fight the fuzzy feeling in his chest, he would.

“Just follow my lead,” Pure Vanilla said with a kind smile.

The monarch took one of Dark Cacao’s hands, intertwining their fingers and lifting their hands until they reached a little under shoulder-height, where they stayed. Pure Vanilla’s other arm was wrapped around Dark Cacao’s waist.

Dark Cacao didn’t really know what to do with his free arm, so he just placed his hand on Pure Vanilla’s shoulder. The affirming nod he received told him he was doing the right thing.

They started off slowly. Pure Vanilla led Dark Cacao through the dance. Their steps were mirrored and, as Dark Cacao grew more talented and confident, the speed picked up until they were swirling around the garden.

A feeling bubbled up in Dark Cacao’s chest, a feeling he hadn’t felt in ages. The feeling left his mouth as loud, barely controllable chuckles that matched Pure Vanilla’s giggles.

After a few more minutes, Dark Cacao slowed down, his breathing slightly labored. “Okay, that is enough, I don’t want to throw up-!”

Pure Vanilla grinned from ear-to-ear, sitting back down on the bench and tugging Dark Cacao next to him.

“Was that so bad?” The monarch asked.

Dark Cacao turned his head to make a sarcastic retort, but instead looked into stupidly beautiful sparkling eyes. Pure Vanilla never opened his eyes and they had no right to be this captivating- oh, right, he had a question to answer.

“Uh, I su- I suppose not.”

Dark Cacao recoiled. He could hit himself. Did he just stammer? The last time he stammered was when he was seven and had to explain the three for mathematics on his report card.

Pure Vanilla didn’t seem bothered. Instead, he moved closer, putting his hand on Dark Cacao’s gloved one. “I enjoyed it.”

Dark Cacao stared straight ahead. He had never felt so ashamed and he had never wanted to kiss someone this bad.

Chapter 9: Drunk On Love

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Pure Vanilla Cookie, in an affectionate mood, visited his darling husband (who was busy overworking) to show him some love. The healer knew very well how much a small distraction could help with a large workload..

..He hadn’t meant to be this much of a distraction, though.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: Alcohol, suggestive themes (but no non-con or explicit)

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: "i know youre working hard on finishing requests and we are all so thankful for your work Bc all ur fics are absolute bangers <333 Still tho- i got a little prompt/request of a hc of mine if ur up for it. Since vanilla extract contains alcohol, what if- Pure Vanilla’s kisses make one tipsy? (And by one I mean Dark Cacao obv) Maybe the ficlet could be a lil suggestive if you feel comfortable enough with that. Its not a must tho!! ❤️"

 

Pure Vanilla walked through the halls of Citadel, his light clothing standing out against the dark patterns of the Dark Cacao Kingdom. None of the maids or warriors looked at him weirdly; the monarch’s presence was as regular as that of his Majesty himself.

This time, he had a specific mission. He would visit his husband, king Dark Cacao Cookie, and (kindly) force him to take a break, however small it might be. Perhaps he could be convinced to take a walk.. it was a beautiful day - by Cacaoian standards, at least.

Finally arriving by the large door that led to Dark Cacao’s study, Pure Vanilla knocked. After a second or two, a quiet ‘Enter’ was heard. When Pure Vanilla walked into the dimly lit room, his suspicions were confirmed.

Dark Cacao Cookie sat behind his desk, hunched over a scroll. Many more of the same sort were scattered over the desk and the floor, the king’s usual precision nowhere to be found.

A sharp hiss was heard from Dark Cacao at the bright daylight that fell into his room. “Close that.”

Pure Vanilla did as he was asked (commanded). The monarch swiftly made his way over to Dark Cacao, carefully stepping over the scrolls to make sure he didn’t crush any.

“Cacao,” Pure Vanilla murmured.

He received no answer. The healer put his head on Dark Cacao’s shoulder to watch if he had even noticed.

A slight mistake near the bottom; one of the characters had a line that was just a little too long, perhaps caused by a small distraction. Pure Vanilla was just being ignored, then.

“Dark Cacao Cookie,” Pure Vanilla said again, his voice more serious this time.

Ah, his full name got a reaction out of the stoic king. Dark Cacao looked up, a little hazy, staring at Pure Vanilla’s face just inches from his.

“What is it you need..? I’m busy.”

“Too busy, one might dare say,” Pure Vanilla hummed. “The Citadel is concerned.”

“Well, you will have to reassure them,” Dark Cacao said, returning to his work.

Pure Vanilla clacked his tongue, eyebrows furrowing slightly. That just wouldn’t do.

He leaned over slightly, pressing a small kiss to Dark Cacao’s lips.

That truly got his attention. He looked up, a little wary, but his eyes had the shine of a toddler tasting their first candy.. Wait, he wasn’t supposed to feel like a toddler tasting their fi-

Before Pure Vanilla could finish that thought, gloved hands had cupped his cheeks and Dark Cacao’s lips were back on him. Dark Cacao pushed the tip of his tongue into Pure Vanilla’s mouth, desperately chasing after the sweet flavour he tasted.

Pure Vanilla, pleased his distraction had worked, let him do as he pleased.. It wasn't until Dark Cacao pulled back that the healer noticed the strange glaze over his eyes.

“Cacao?” Pure Vanilla frowned. “Are you alright..?”

“Yes..” Dark Cacao’s voice had a slight slur to it. “Let me.. I need to..”

“Look at me.” Pure Vanilla pulled back slightly, and Dark Cacao let out a pitiful groan. That.. wasn’t like him at all.

Pure Vanilla cupped Dark Cacao’s face with his hands, staring into those unfocused, amethyst eyes. Normally, Dark Cacao would’ve batted his hands away, and it was a little worrying that he hadn’t done that just now.

Oh. Oh.

Pure Vanilla could hit himself.

Of course… when Strawberry Crêpe Cookie had done a scan on his dough recently, and had found an alcohol percentage of 35%. Dark Cacao hadn’t had any issues with it in the past, but if he was in a weak state…

“‘Nilla..” Dark Cacao slurred. “Come- come on, don’t be like that.. let-le’me have–”

Pure Vanilla opened his mouth to reply, but all Dark Cacao saw was an opportunity. He leaned forward and messily kissed Pure Vanilla’s cheeks, and then his forehead, and then his lips. This much affection from the king was unheard of, and Pure Vanilla felt himself growing red.

“Cacao,” Pure Vanilla murmured softly. “You are not in the right mind. Stop it.”

Dark Cacao might have been as desperate as a starving hound, but he knew how to recognise boundaries. He let his head fall against Pure Vanilla’s shoulder with a small grunt, his abdomen unnecessarily needy.

“At least..” Pure Vanilla said with a small smile. “That is not to say I won’t reconsider when you’re sober.”

 

Chapter 10: Drunk On Love PT.2

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Pure Vanilla Cookie had learned many, many things in his relationship with Dark Cacao Cookie - his husband just never seized to amaze him.

Tonight, he learned Dark Cacao was as stubborn as a mule when drunk.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: Drunk Dark Cacao, alcohol mentioned

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: "OKAY FIRST OFF YOUR WRITING JUST HITS DIFFERENT. 🥰✨💓🤌❤️🎉💥 Now that I'm okay again Could we have a part two on the love drunk purecacao fic you wrote not so long ago"

“Nilla–!!”

Pure Vanilla Cookie closed his eyes and raised his face upwards, as if begging the Witches for an inexhaustible source of patience. They knew he needed it badly right now.

Dark Cacao Cookie had proved to be.. more than a small challenge. Pure Vanilla was certain he’d be easier to handle while under the influence of alcohol; instead, it seemed he had grown even more hard-headed than sober.

Pure Vanilla’s eyebrows furrowed in concern at Dark Cacao’s next shout; it was frantic and panicked, and the healer’s eyes shot open. He couldn’t help but worry.. What if he had accidentally hurt himself?

A stumbling down the stairs was heard, and Pure Vanilla jumped up from his seat with a yelp, running over to where Dark Cacao had fallen. Luckily, he seemed to have only tripped on the lowest steps.

“‘Nilla,” Dark Cacao slurred, his wide-blown eyes refusing to meet Pure Vanilla’s. “S horri'ble… we haff ta… hic… ”

“What, my dear?” Pure Vanilla said, giving his husband a little shake. “What is it?"

Dark Cacao’s eyes finally met Pure Vanilla’s, filled with desperation. " We're — hic — completely un'prepared... f'r time trav'lers."

Pure Vanilla blinked at him. He felt he might actually cry. “What?”

“Wha'... wha' are we s'posed t’ show 'em when... — hic — when they come...?” Dark Cacao stressed, sounding genuinely upset. “Th-they’ll wanna... hic... bring som’thin’ w’ them t’ their preshent...!”

“Time travelers?” Pure Vanilla repeated. “Cacao, time- time travel isn’t.. real? What in the world are you on about? Did you hit your head? Do you need to be healed.”

“Izz all... hic ... all your fault, p'isonin’ me w’ your li—yer lips...!” Dark Cacao sniffled. “Stupid... pretty lips... pretty face... — hic— mmh, y’r so pretty… Can I— hic ... can I kissh you...?”

“And you are very drunk, mister,” Pure Vanilla laughed, closing his eyes again. “No kissing tonight, not until I figure out why my ingredients suddenly have such a big effect on you now. I’ve never seen you like this before..”

Dark Cacao let out a sob, flung his arms around Pure Vanilla’s shoulders and leaned his full weight on him. Pure Vanilla was not prepared to take the weight of a suspiciously tall warrior that looked like he ate a hundred push-ups for breakfast.

“Cacao-!” Pure Vanilla squeaked, trying in vain to push Dark Cacao off. “Move, you great moron–!”

Pure Vanilla wasn’t weak; hell, assassins had learned he could defend himself perfectly fine with a knife or sword. He just didn’t occupy brute strength like Dark Cacao did.

Judging by the soft snores, Dark Cacao had found his husband to be an excellent resting place. What a shame this resting place was poking and prodding him in the chest while grumbling in his ear.

Dark Cacao rolled off of his husband with a low groan, deciding the carpet was a nice second option. Pure Vanilla disagreed.

“Up, you,” the healer commanded, tugging Dark Cacao to his feet.

Dark Cacao muttered a string of incomprehensible curses in a language Pure Vanilla did not speak; the usually stoic king tended to return to his native language when on the brink of sleep, something Pure Vanilla found very endearing.

“Come on, my dear..” Pure Vanilla gently squeezed Dark Cacao’s hand, leading him up the stairs with all the care in the world.

Dark Cacao stumbled into their bedroom, where Pure Vanilla helped him onto the bed with a chuckle. The warrior wouldn’t remember a thing about this in the morning.. but Pure Vanilla would be pleased to remind him.

Just as the healer stood up to leave the room, strong arms wrapped around his waist and pulled him into the bed. Dark Cacao put his chin on the top of Pure Vanilla’s head, closing his eyes and pulling his husband to his chest.

Pure Vanilla was surprised for a moment, before a small smile tugged at his lips.

This wasn’t so bad, after all.. a lot better than the carpet, that’s for sure.

Chapter 11: Veneficium

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───
venēficium n (genitive venēficiī or venēficī); second declension
an instance of poisoning; poisonous substance
─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff, mild angst?

Prompt: “ I have no idea if your still open to requests but if you are then I always did have the idea that affogato cookie was poisoning dark cacao cookie behind his back as a failsafe. Perhaps cacao lets it slip or vanilla finds out one way or another and has some choice words for the kings former advisor. Idk, either way their both fine now but still a scary thing to happen lol.”

Dark Cacao Cookie and Pure Vanilla Cookie were in the small shelter a mile or so from the Citadel. Their horses waited outside patiently, the falling snow doing nothing to deter them. Cacaoian horses were quite used to the weather and had thick coats.

It had been silent for a few minutes now. Not an uncomfortable silence, but a calm one. One that allowed both the rulers a break, a moment to think and take their minds off of their sorrows.

The eye of Pure Vanilla’s orchid-like staff focused on a spot in the snow that differed from the rest of the ground around the small pagoda. There was a thin layer of snow, unlike the thick layers around it, as if an object had recently been removed.

“Cacao, my dear?” Pure Vanilla said, putting a hand on Dark Cacao’s arm without removing his gaze from the spot. “What is that?”

Dark Cacao looked at it for half a second, before refocusing his stare on the mountains. “Snow.”

“Yes, I know it’s snow.” Pure Vanilla let out a small huff, squeezing Dark Cacao’s arm. “I’m asking why it looks different.”

Dark Cacao looked at it for a little longer this time, before letting out a small hum as he realised why the snow was different.

“Ah, of course. One of Affogato Cookie’s incense burners used to stand there.. it made my head hurt.” Dark Cacao paused to sigh. “The pounding in my skull never quite left, even after I had it removed.. perhaps I had an allergy to something.”

“No..” Pure Vanilla murmured. “No, incense shouldn’t do that. There must’ve been- Cacao, where would that traitor be at this moment?”

Dark Cacao blinked, taken aback slightly.

“I suppose he’d be back at the Coffee Tribe,” Dark Cacao said.

“I think I’ll be returning to the castle now,” Pure Vanilla said sharply. “Feel free to remain here, I know the way.”

“Oh.. there is no reason for you to venture out alone-” Dark Cacao began, but Pure Vanilla had already mounted his horse. The king watched him go, a little perplexed.

Pure Vanilla felt a strange feeling course through his veins as he rode away.

Anger.

It wasn’t the rage his friends felt before charging into battle, but a variant of it. A cold variant, one that scared Pure Vanilla a little. A little, but not enough to control himself.

No-one stopped Pure Vanilla as he walked through the practically abandoned village of the Coffee Tribe. Nobody stopped him as he knocked on the shabby door, decorated with a small but luxurious name sigm.

“You may enter!~” An overly cheerful voice rang out.

The door opened slowly to reveal Pure Vanilla Cookie, his face void of emotion as he stared at Affogato Cookie.

“Good morning,” the monarch said, but his voice wasn’t pleasurable. “I’d like to have a word.”

“Of course, my liege!” Affogato replied sweetly, but a hint of unease had snuck into his eyes. “How can I be of assistance? Did his Majesty send you..? I assure you, I took only my own belongings when I was rudely kicked out-”

“Oh, no,” Pure Vanilla said in that same overly-sweet and fake tone, “Not in the slightest.. I think he would disencourage me from doing what I’d like to do.”

“What.. would you like to do, my lord..?” Affogato asked, his smile slowly fading.

“Nothing… I would just like to ask a few questions, if that’s okay.”

Affogato nodded, pulling his most convincingly innocent smile up yet again. “Anytime.”

“I won’t waste your time, and I’ll get straight to the point..” Pure Vanilla paused, opening his eyes. “What did you put in Dark Cacao Cookie’s incense? The one outside his shelter, and the one in his room?”

“Oh, well, the regular, there weren’t much materials I could work with-”

“But you had access to sugar, yes?” Pure Vanilla cut him off. “Dark Cacao told me all about your sweet tooth. You also knew he doesn’t go well with sugar. I will ask you one more time.. what did you put in the incense?”

Affogato opened his mouth and closed it again, before finally breaking. “Fine! I may have put a bit of sugar in the incense, but only for his pleasure-!”

“Not just sugar,” Pure Vanilla cut him off. “It would’ve been only a little offensive if you put sugar in your king’s incense. But only sugar wouldn’t have such a large impact on his health. What. Did. You. Put. In the insence.”

Affogato’s eyes were wide, his mouth opening and closing like a confused flytrap in the rain. “I don’t- You couldn’t possibly-”

“You put poison in there, didn’t you..?” Pure Vanilla’s voice was uncharacteristically low for his doing, the usual warmth in his face and voice nowhere to be found. “You were poisoning Dark Cacao Cookie.”

Affogato didn’t answer, and that said enough. With a sharp hiss, Pure Vanilla stood up, walking back towards his horse. Just before he left, he turned his head to face Affogato once more.

“Know this, Affogato Cookie. I will find out what you’ve put in it, and I’ll find the antidote. I won’t let you hurt any of the people he or I hold dear. And when I tell Dark Cacao what you’ve done to him..”

Pure Vanilla held Affogato’s gaze.

“You’ll wish you started running as far away as you could from the moment you got banished.”

Chapter 12: King's Blessing

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Caramel Arrow Cookie wishes to introduce her king-father to her soon-to-be wife, Financier Cookie.

Unfortunately for all three of them, Dark Cacao Cookie has not in the slightest forgotten what had happened during the Odyssey.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff, slight angst (?)

Prompt: "do you think that dark cacao would go dad mode and go after whoever is marrying caramel arrow with the intent to have his sword make contact with their insides in an unpleasant way"

Three quiet knocks on Dark Cacao Cookie’s door shook the king from his thoughts, and he stood up to open the door. The visitor was his most loyal Watcher and daughter, Caramel Arrow Cookie.

“Caramel Arrow,” Dark Cacao said. “Do you require my assistance with anything..?”

“No, my lord,” Caramel Arrow said, her usually stern voice tinged with nervousness, “I only wish for you to.. meet someone.”

Dark Cacao’s face cleared up. “Ah, are you finally introducing me to your husband?”

“You- knew I planned to get married?” Caramel Arrow asked carefully, her expression guarded.

“You were twitching like a frightened rabbit all week,” Dark Cacao said kindly. “Did you bring him with you..?”

“It’s not quite.. a ‘him’, your Majesty,” Caramel Arrow replied. “But she’s just as strong as any warrior in our army. She’s very protective and could, err, hypothetically.. take an angry warrior in an attack. You’ve met her before, I believe..”

“Hm.. well, at least you chose a strong lady,” Dark Cacao hummed thoughtfully. “I hadn’t expected anything else from you, if I’m truthful. When do I get to meet her?”

“I brought her with me, actually,” Caramel Arrow said. Her shoulders were squared and her back was straight, a defence mechanism in uncomfortable situations she had inherited from her father.

The archer stepped aside, and another knight stepped beside her. Not a knight.. a paladin. A paladin with a white uniform with golden decorations, with blonde hair as straight as a ruler and brownish eyes that gauged the king’s reaction carefully.

Dark Cacao’s eyes twitched, his smile the fakest thing Caramel Arrow had ever seen (excluding Affogato Cookie).

“A word, please..?”

Dark Cacao promptly turned around, not bothering to check if Caramel Arrow was even following. The smile was gone completely when they were alone in the king’s room, replaced by dark eyes.

“Caramel Chocolate Arrow Cookie. You have five minutes to explain yourself before I take her head,” Dark Cacao said, his voice dangerously calm.

“She only interfered between you and the Consul because it was her duty to! I thought- I was sure you would appreciate the loyalty!” Caramel Arrow burst out, her brown eyes blown wide with determination.

“I would appreciate the loyalty if she was not protecting a traitor and a thief who wanted to take my Souljam,” Dark Cacao snarled.

“She had no voice in the discussion, she was only there to protect, just as Crunchy Chip was!” Caramel Arrow’s voice was louder than she had meant it to be.

“I don’t care! My daughter, my heir, is not marrying that.. that Vanillian scum! End of discussion!” Dark Cacao shouted back.

“‘Vanillian scum’?” Caramel Arrow repeated disbelievingly. “A bit hypocritical, no? If I remember correctly, you were the one caught in Pure Vanilla Cookie’s bedroom, your Majesty !”

“Have you lost your mind?!” Dark Cacao growled, but his ears went a dark red. “Who do you think you are, talking to your king and father like this? Do I need to teach you a lesson in discipline?!”

“Do what you want! I am marrying Financier Cookie, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me!” Caramel Arrow crossed her arms over her chest, imitating her father’s position subconsciously. Their facial expressions were mirrored perfectly.

A flicker of hesitation in the king’s eyes was all Caramel Arrow needed to see to know she won the argument. In turn, the smugness in her eyes sufficed to make Dark Cacao realised he lost.

“She will have to cut off all contact with that insolent man,” Dark Cacao demanded after a moment of silence. “She will follow a Warrior’s training, and you will strictly sleep apart until your wedding night. If you get caught even holding hands, I’ll have her executed. Am I clear?”

“Crystal,” Caramel Arrow grinned, following her father outside where her girlfriend was waiting.

Dark Cacao was first to reach Financier. He grabbed her by her shoulders, staring into her eyes intensely before muttering; “If I ever, ever hear you break my daughter’s heart, I’ll make sure to send yours to your family.”

Caramel Arrow, who most certainly heard this, shouldered him away quickly to take a perplexed Financier’s hands in her own.

“That’s practically his blessing,” Caramel Arrow whispered excitedly, pulling her girlfriend-turned-fiance away through the halls of the citadel.

“I said no such thing!” Dark Cacao shouted at them. His voice was slightly warmer than before.

Chapter 13: Until Next Time

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Dark Cacao Cookie has to hide his young son after threats from a neighbouring Kingdom, unable to stand the nervosity. He knew he could only safely close his eyes at night if he knew Dark Choco Cookie was safe in the hands of a friend…

And what Kingdom is safer than the Vanilla Kingdom?

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Tooth-Rotting Fluff

Prompt: "i have a request, an interaction between dark choco and pure vanilla, maybe one time that pure vanilla got to babysit him when the prince was young only to discover that dark choco cookie ha a bitter view of the world inherited from hi father"

Dark Choco Cookie was aged five years old when his father left him in the gentle hands of Pure Vanilla Cookie, the monarch of the Vanilla Kingdom.

He didn’t understand why. Did Dark Cacao Cookie not love him anymore? Did the  king decide he wasn’t worthy of being a warrior, of being the heir to the throne?

Dark Cacao shushed these worries with his last words.

“You will stay here for your own safety,” Dark Cacao said, cupping Dark Choco’s cheeks with an unknown gentleness. “I will come back for you, my boy.”

“Warrior’s oath?” Dark Choco sniffled.

Dark Cacao smiled – a rare sight – and nodded. “Warrior’s oath.”

The king stood up straight, meeting his lover’s gaze. Well, not really, since Pure Vanilla Cookie’s eyes were closed - but it was the thought that counted. Both rulers had a mirrored expression of concern.

“Take good care of him,” Dark Cacao murmured, cupping Pure Vanilla’s face with his hands. 

“Always, my love,” Pure Vanilla murmured, pressing a kiss to the king’s lips.

Dark Choco made a gagging sound.

Dark Cacao suppressed a smile, looking at his son once more… before he turned around and walked back to the royal carriage. Dark Choco sniffled again, but kept his tears from falling.

“Don’t cry, my little warrior,” Pure Vanilla cooed, “He’ll be back before you know it. We’re going to have so much fun in the meantime!”

“I’m not little ,” Dark Choco huffed. “Father says I’ll grow big and strong, just like him.”

Pure Vanilla smiled. The way Dark Choco puffed his cheeks out when he was upset made him look a lot like a certain stoic warrior-king when he was younger.. Pure Vanilla loved seeing his husband’s traits in his son’s appearance.

“Come, my prince, I have so much I wish to show you!”

 

The first place they visited were the Vanilian gardens, right behind the castle. They were as large as one would expect; seemingly endless fields of greenery and beautiful flowers.

“Father says flowers are a waste of space,” Dark Choco said casually. “He says they’re useless in everything except a fleeting moment of beauty.”

Pure Vanilla’s smile tightened slightly. “Does he, now?”

“Yep!” Dark Choco said, popping the ‘p’. “He also says I shouldn’t mention that I unrooted all of the gardener’s flowers once when I was three.”

“You mentioned it just now,” Pure Vanilla pointed out.

Dark Choco was silent for a second, before frowning.

“No matter,” Pure Vanilla said quickly, raising his hands in the air as if surrendering. “I’m sure you will appreciate their beauty in no-time, just as your father learned to do!”

“Maybe,” Dark Choco murmured unconvincingly. “Is this where training will be?”

“Ah.. well, you see, Vanillians aren’t that big on training,” Pure Vanilla said carefully. “During your time here, you will be trained in the art of healing.”

Pure Vanilla could’ve told the young boy he was going to drop a bomb on his home address and he would’ve gotten the same reaction.

“What?!” Dark Choco cried out. “But- what about my training?! Healing is useless in combat!”

“Let me guess, your father told you that, too?” Pure Vanilla sighed.

“He thinks it can be useful sometimes, but he also says he fears the unstoppable marching of time that will eventually take even the strongest! I don’t know what that means, I thought he was bullshitting!” Dark Choco stressed.

“You’re awfully young to be using that kind of language,” Pure Vanilla said, raising his eyebrows.

“Ah… well, my tutor said my vocabulary is much larger than it should b-”

“I was talking about the cursing,” Pure Vanilla cut him off dryly. “And I’m fairly sure your tutor was calling you a smartass.”

“Father doesn’t mind cursing as long as it’s in private,” Dark Choco said.

“I think I’m going to have a long, long talk with your father when he gets back.”

“Ha! My father isn’t afraid of you!” Dark Choco grinned confidently. “I bet he could take you in a fight! He’s the strongest warrior in all of Earthbread!”

“Strength isn’t just about power, little prince,” Pure Vanilla hummed. “It’s about who you are on the inside.”

“Yeah, and ‘bout how good you are at chopping up your enemies with a sword!”

“I cannot wait to speak to Dark Cacao,” Pure Vanilla smiled tightly. “Do tell him I wish to tell him a thing or two when he calls you tonight.”

Dark Choco shrugged, which was basically a ‘yes, of course, anything you ask’ .

“Tell me, Dark Choco, do you have any interesting stories to tell? Dark Cacao did always love telling tales.. perhaps you inherited his love for the dramatics?” Pure Vanilla suggested, sitting down on a nearby bench and signaling for Dark Choco to join him.

“Have you heard the story of the Boy In The Forest ?!” Dark Choco asked, his eyes wild with excitement. “It’s my favourite!”

Pure Vanilla had heard that story from Dark Cacao at least half a million times. He smiled.

“I have not, tell me all about it.”

Chapter 14: The Second King

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

In an alternate universe far, far away, the roles are reversed. In this specific universe, Dark Cacao is not a king - at least, not anymore. He works as a maid in the Citadel very much like that one in our own dimension, for a king named Coffee Roll Cookie.. one we might know as the Second Watcher of the Dark Cacao Kingdom.

While this king, just as everyone, has his flaws, he isn’t stupid. He’s suspicious of his maid, the maid who does his job just a little too good and knows the insides of the Citadel just a little too well…

And Coffee Roll isn’t actively avoiding this maid because of a different reason, of course not. What a silly thought…

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: Mention of poisoning

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: None; I based this on a friend's blog, @rolereversalauwatchercao on tumblr because it's genuinely my favourite thing in the world. Please go check it out and show them some support!

King Coffee Roll Cookie sat behind his desk in the royal bedroom, a stack of old records in front of him and his head in his hands. He had been reading for hours straight, which wasn’t very good for his remaining eye. Coffee Roll knew this for a fact because the healers at the Citadel had told him this very explicitly and very repeatedly.

The king was looking for a report on the old king of his Kingdom, the king who had left his people behind. Unfortunately for Coffee Roll, there had been a crack in the Wall a century or so ago, and the room where the records were stored was flooded.

This did not make his job a lot easier.

Coffee Roll was shaken from his thoughts by the knocking on his door. It was a knock he had long since memorised; two short knocks, one long knock and one short one again.

“Dark Cacao Cookie. You may enter,” Coffee Roll called out, straightening his back.

Dark Cacao walked into the room, lowering his head and torso in a small bow. “Your Majesty. I was sent to dust the books in your room on request of your healers.”

“Why do they always send you ?” Coffee Roll sighed, burying his face in his calloused hands again.

Dark Cacao raised an eyebrow at the sight. “If it’s a problem, I can be replaced-”

“No!” Coffee Roll said a little too quickly, looking up. His cheeks darkened slightly at the intensity in his own voice, and he cleared his throat. “Err.. that will not be necessary. "You'll have to do.”

“Is that supposed to be a compliment?” Dark Cacao huffed out a quiet chuckle, walking past the king to dust the bookshelves behind him.

Was Coffee Roll really at fault for turning around to watch the maid stretch to his tallest to reach the ceiling shelves?

“Be careful with that,” Coffee Roll said as Dark Cacao reached the older books. “I don’t want them to disintegrate into dust. I’d hate to have your head chopped off for destruction of royal property.”

“Oh, don’t be silly,” Dark Cacao chuckled. “You haven’t had executed anyone since–”

A silence fell when the unspoken words echoed through their minds. Not since the last king fled.

“No matter,” The maid said quickly, continuing his work, “The important part is that the new anti-guillotine law was extremely popular amongst the residents of your kingdom, your Majesty.”

“Obviously. Who wouldn’t like a law that kept their heads attached to their necks?”

Dark Cacao barely suppressed a smile. “Ever the perceptive, sire.”

“Oh, don’t suck up to me, Cacao. I have enough of that with Affogato Cookie,” Coffee Roll scoffed good-naturedly.

Dark Cacao’s movement halted for a second, stopping his dusting. His smile tightened and left his eyes all together. Coffee Roll noticed.

“You seem tense. Is the relationship between you two that bad?” The king asked, turning to fully look at Dark Cacao.

“Affogato Cookie and I are not on good terms,” Dark Cacao said curtly. “I would appreciate it if you couldn’t compare me to him, sire.”

“..are you still convinced he poisoned you?” There was no smile on Coffee Roll’s face, but his good eye twinkled mischievously.

“Not only convinced, my lord,” Dark Cacao said darkly. “I know it for certain. He wants me gone.”

“If he poisoned you, shouldn’t you be having a seizure on the floor when you took it?” Coffee Roll pointed out. “Unless you drank poison every day since you were born to prepare yourself for the day an ill-intended royal advisor tried to kill you..”

Dark Cacao held his gaze.

“..you know, I don’t even think I’m going to finish that sentence.”

“I do warn you, your Majesty,” Dark Cacao said seriously. “That man is up to no good, I’m calling it.”

“Call all you want, Affogato is useful to the Kingdom,” Coffee Roll sighed. “I can’t banish him because you think he might’ve put something in your drink.”

“If that’s your final order..” Dark Cacao said cryptically. “Don’t knock on my door when he steals the throne.”

It was Coffee Roll’s time to raise an eyebrow, now. “Are you seeing you would deny your king access to your home in a time of need?”

Dark Cacao paused. “..forget I said anything.”

Coffee Roll laughed, putting his hand on Dark Cacao’s shoulder. A mistake, it seemed, as Dark Cacao subconsciously put his hand on the one on his shoulder. The king’s face immediately flared up and felt as hot as an oven.

“Right, then. Wonderful job. Off you go, now, back to.. whatever you maids do in your free time,” Coffee Roll said quickly, just barely managing not to stammer.

“But- sire, I haven’t finished dusting- and I am not a maid-!” Dark Cacao’s brows furrowed as he was ushered towards the door.

He just barely got to see a flustered Coffee Roll slam the door in his face, causing Dark Cacao to smile.

Undeniably endearing.

Notes:

don't worry i haven't stopped with purecacao there's a few fics in the making ><

Chapter 15: Truthless Resolution

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Death comes for all, but the Truth lives on.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: Mentions of betrayal, manipulation

Genre: Hurt/No Comfort

Prompt: Based on this (https://www.tumblr.com/janayuga/777938054708166656?source=share) fanart!

Truthless Recluse made his way through the empty halls of the once grandiose Citadel, his steps barely ghosting over the ground. His face was neutral, but his mismatched eyes stood cold. The inhabitants of this castle had long since fled, their promised vows meaning nothing as their ever-stoic king slowly turned to madness alongside his lover.

Now, Dark Cacao Cookie wasn’t as stoic. He was apathetic - which was arguably worse. He knew of the horrors out there, but he didn’t try to hide it behind a mask of his own face; he just didn’t care anymore. After all, all you need to know is the Truth.. and Truthless Recluse had helped him see it.

Nothing mattered.

Memento mori , remember you must die. All is futile, all will fade… all but the cold, stone-hard Truth. The Truth stays forever, and resides in both good and evil. It’s in the past, present and future, for as long as the universe has occupants. Nothing is certain except for the fact Truth most undoubtedly is.

It was a nice thought. Dark Cacao had been having those a lot more often, now that he was alone with Truthless Recluse. Soft touches that caressed his face, even after all the blood stained on his hands.

Did he deserve it? Maybe not.. or maybe it didn’t matter, because nothing mattered.

“Dark Cacao, my dear,” Truthless Recluse said, walking up to the ex-king, who was staring out of the window. “Thinking again?”

“No,” Dark Cacao replied honestly. He was deep inside his memory palace, chasing after memories long forgotten. It was useless, but it didn’t mean he couldn’t try.. he had all the time in the world, after all.

“Good,” Truthless Recluse hummed. “You know I do so hate seeing you hurt by your thoughts.”

Dark Cacao only huffed in reply. Truthless Recluse looked to his side, but didn’t meet Dark Cacao’s eyes - literally. He had stopped caring as much about his hair, feigning to tie it up and allowing his bangs to grow out and cover his eyes.

What was there he needed to see besides the Truth, which remained even after closing his eyes?

Truthless Recluse smiled to himself, gazing out of the window at the endless snow. He had felt cold in this kingdom long ago. Dark Cacao had offered him his cloak, if he remembered correctly..

No. Not him. King Dark Cacao Cookie had given his cloak to monarch Pure Vanilla Cookie, not to Truthless Recluse.

He turned to his husband, seeing Dark Cacao’s lips pressed together tightly, his head lowered. Thinking after all, then.

“Oh, your poor soul..” Truthless Recluse sighed, cupping Dark Cacao’s cheek with one hand, his other still curled around his purposeless staff. “So lost in your thoughts.. I truly do wish you would give up on those harmful images, my dear.”

“There is something..” Dark Cacao whispered. “A fleeting memory. A boy, a baby.. it ended in betrayal, but.. not quite..”

Truthless Recluse stiffened, his hold on Dark Cacao’s face tightening.

“It did end in betrayal, Cacao. The boy betrayed you, just as all your subjects did.. he left you here,” Truthless Recluse pouted in mock sympathy. “You have me, my dear. For all of eternity. We are two halves, designed to be together. You can only trust me.. everyone else has left, after all.”

Dark Cacao was silent for a moment, before a sigh escaped his lips. It wasn’t necessarily an exhale, but more of a memory, given up by it’s owner.

“Yes..” Dark Cacao murmured. “I have you.. Only you.”

Chapter 16: Truthless Resolution PT.2

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Putting an end to the Truth is the same as putting an end to eternity - you can’t, for it lives on no matter what.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Hurt/No Comfort

Prompt: "https://www.tumblr.com/caramelarrowswife/778030490017005569/do-it PLEASE PLEASE MORE OF THIS 🙏🙏🙏"

Dark Cacao Cookie watched in silence as the intruders retreated like Death Himself chased them. They had broken into the castle; young, ambitious cookies, determined to bring honour to their family by discovering the secret of the half-collapsed Citadel near the Eastern border.

They fled the moment they laid eyes upon the old king.

Dark Cacao didn’t think he was that scary. Sure, he had feigned to take care of his hair for a few eons, and he mighn’t have slept for a decade or two, but to send determined doughlings back to whence they came at the very sight of him..?

A sigh came from the old warrior before he slipped back into the trance he seemed to be in more often than not, these days. How disappointing..

“Cacao, my dear?” A voice rang out through the hallway, shaking Dark Cacao from his daze.

Dark Cacao said nothing, but Truthless Recluse could tell by the slight turn of his head that his call had been heard.

“Newcomers, again?” Truthless Recluse said, mismatched eyes flickering over the fresh imprints in the snow. “What a shame.. I would’ve liked to.. exchange a word or two. What a shame, indeed..”

Dark Cacao only nodded, continuing to face the direction in which the cookies had left.

“You seem more upset than you usually are by their departure,” Truthless Recluse remarked. “Have you still not gotten used to it..?”

“They will return filled with shame,” Dark Cacao replied quietly, his voice rough with disuse, “Shame, because they failed to do what they came to do..”

“And what do you think they would’ve done?” Truthless Recluse said, an equally amused and cruel smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “The deep dips in the snow suggest they were armed, my dear. Do you think they would’ve stayed for a nice chat if they worked up the courage to enter the Citadel..?”

“..I suppose not,” Dark Cacao murmured.

“No, I don’t suppose either,” Truthless Recluse agreed, putting an arm on Dark Cacao’s forearm, slightly squeezing the muscle there. “Could you truly put the blame on their side of the board? There are rarely any who don’t fear the Truth.. and the ones who don’t are crazy.”

“Or brave,” Dark Cacao said.

“Bravery is by far the kindest word for foolishness, isn’t it?” Truthless Recluse smiled. “Don’t go against my word now, my love. Do not forget who showed you the Truth, who showed you the way of life. Do not forget who saved you from oblivion.”

“I won’t.” Dark Cacao lowered his head, his bangs hiding his face from sight even more than they usually did.

“Good,” Truthless Recluse said, his free hand letting go of his staff to instead curl around Dark Cacao’s neck, lifting his chin. “Anything but the Truth leads to failure and pain, my dear.. remember that. Remember that you need me.”

“..I will.”

Chapter 17: Truthless Resolution PT.3

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Dark Choco Cookie has inherited many things from his father; his looks, his stoicism, his complete obliviousness and his courage. The last is most apparent; after all, who but the bravest of cookies would dare step into a corrupt king’s abandoned castle?

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Prompt: "Can I request Choco somehow freeing both his dads from being emo and evil /silly (the evil purecacao au I've seen from you and @/janayuga) "

 

Snow crunched underneath Dark Choco Cookie’s feet as he made his way over to the castle, his bag slung over his shoulder. His remaining eye shone with both determination and fear — determination, because he would see his father again, and fear for the very same reason.

Dark Choco halted before the large, imposing doors of the Dark Cacao Castle. Remarkable how the structure managed to remain fully intact after all those years, unyielding against the unforgiving snow and blizzards. A shame those who had built it were long gone.

Almost out of instinct, Dark Choco’s hand raised to knock on the door, before he stopped himself. Oh, yeah, just knock on the doors of your evil father’s castle, no biggie, your head will surely stay attached to your torso.

A quiet push to the door revealed, to Dark Choco’s amazement, that the castle had no lock or protection whatsoever. Well.. he supposed there weren’t crowds of cookies trying to get inside, anyway.

Dark Choco exhaled softly, before stepping into the fortress. His boots made uncomfortably loud noises against the practically frozen tiles, bringing back unwanted memories from his youth.

Dark Choco walked for what felt like an eternity, but what was, in reality, only a few minutes, before he heard voices coming from the room at the end of the hallway. He approached slowly, taking care to muffle the sound of his footsteps by removing his boots.

“—should really stop coming here late at night, my dear. I know you are used to the cold, but we wouldn’t want you to catch a cold, hm?”

Dark Choco recoiled, his eye wide in shock. That voice…

He remembered it from his childhood, but it was.. different. It was the same voice, but a different tone. Where there used to be warmth and care, there was now mild mock and apathy. That voice couldn’t possibly belong to…

Dark Choco took the risk and peeked around the corner, looking into the room where he had heard the voices. He saw the back of a slender figure, blond hair curling to a stop at the start of the shoulders. Long, sleek robes in dark-blue and gold covered the cookie in front of Dark Choco.

And that was when he saw him.

Him.

A broad chest and a muscular physique, but he looked.. off. His shoulders were slumped as the figure in front of him talked to him with feigned sympathy, and his hair was longer at the front than Dark Choco remembered it being. His face was void of emotion, even more than it had always been. His clothes were similar to the ones he had worn before, but this time, they coloured a clinically white.

A startled gasp escaped Dark Choco’s mouth, and the more familiar figure’s head shot up. Dark-amethyst eyes met maroon ones, and Dark Choco knew without doubt… this was Dark Cacao Cookie, the former king of the Dark Cacao Kingdom and Dark Choco’s father.

Dark Cacao stood up from where he was seated, causing the other cookie to turn around at the interruption; and this time, Dark Choco recognised him, too.

“Pure Vanilla Cookie..?” Dark Choco whispered.

The cookie smiled tightly, a flicker of danger running through mismatched eyes. “Oh, no. Not anymore. My name is Truthless Recluse — you can assume me to be the aware version of the cookie you seek. Tell me, brave stranger, who are you to have ventured into our castle..?”

“Stranger..?” Dark Choco’s voice cracked. “You cannot be serious. I- I am your son! You raised me! What the hell is this?! What did you do to my father?!”

Truthless Recluse raised an eyebrow, stalking forward until he stood face-to-face with the younger traveller. “Hm, let me see… no, I think I would’ve remembered you. Out.”

“What-?!”

“..wait.”

Both Dark Choco and Truthless Recluse were startled by Dark Cacao’s interruption, but the latter recovered first.

“Sweetheart, you have no idea who this is. Out, boy, now,” Truthless Recluse snarled, his smile fading as fast as it had appeared.

“Who is he..?” Dark Cacao asked quietly. His voice was hoarse with disuse.

“This, my love,” Truthless Recluse said, “Is the cookie that betrayed you, that took advantage of your weakest stage to topple you from your throne. Your son, indeed, but you disowned him – how could you not, after he tried to kill you?”

Dark Choco let out a sound that sounded suspiciously similar to a sob, and Dark Cacao stepped forward. “Is this true..?”

“Of course, my love, how could I speak anything but-”

“No,” Dark Choco choked out. "Banished. Banished, I was banished and to be killed on sight. But never disowned. You never disowned me, father, never.”

Truthless Recluse sighed and rolled his eyes, opening his mouth to speak when Dark Cacao put a hand on his shoulder, silencing him. “Did you know this..?”

“Well, fine, but is it not the same thing?” Truthless Recluse said.

“No.” Dark Cacao’s voice was dangerously low. “You told me my son was dead.”

“He is. Dead to you, dead to us after his betrayal. Cacao, you cannot seriously believe this traitor over-”

“You lied,” Dark Cacao growled. “You lied to me.”

“I don’t lie, my dear,” Truthless Recluse said, speaking as one would do to a three-year-old. “It’s my whole thing, the cold, harsh Truth.”

“But he lives.. the memories are overwhelming,” Dark Cacao murmured softly. “Choco, my boy, is that really you..? Is this a cruel trick..?”

“Yes!” Dark Choco cried out and, unable to contain himself, rushed over to his father to hug him tight.

Dark Cacao’s eyes widened in confusion for a second or two, before his knees buckled. Dark Choco helped him to the ground, where Dark Cacao clung to him like a life support, choked sobs escaping his sore throat.

Truthless Recluse stared. He stared and did nothing else, because he was starting to realise Dark Cacao was right. He had lied.

What was Truthless Recluse if not the Truth? What could he stand for if for nothing at all? What could he do, except bringing forth the Truth to those who needed to hear it?

He was a liar.

Liar.

Liar liar liar liar liar liar liarliarliarliarliarl iarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliar liarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliarliar

Without realising he did, Truthless Recluse had sagged to his knees, one hand raising to touch his cheeks. Warm tears streamed onto his fingers and he let out a strangled gasp.

Dark Choco took notice and met Truthless Recluse’s eyes, before holding out a hand. Truthless Recluse did not join them until he was forcibly tugged into the hug.

“I’m sorry,” Truthless Recluse choked. “Oh, Witches, Cacao– Cacao, please forgive—”

“I know,” Dark Cacao mumbled, holding him close. “I am too- oh, Choco—”

Tears streamed down Dark Choco’s face as he laughed, his hands trembling. “I know, I know you are, but don’t apologise now. There’ll be time for that later.. now, just hold me. Hold me, and tell me everything will be alright.. just like the old times.”

Chapter 18: Burden

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

What’s worse than a king who takes all for himself, not sparing a single  thought to his subjects?

A king who takes nothing.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Mild Hurt/Comfort

Prompt: "hey can i req some dark cacao-centric angst(?) and hurt/comfort? basically cacao refusing any sort of help out of not wanting to burden others but it immensely backfires when he tries to walk it off after getting badly injured from battle (choco was NOT having it at all)"

Dark Cacao Cookie didn’t know how long it had been. How long it had been since he had slept, how long it had been since he had eaten, how long it had been since he had left his chamber, how long it had been since he had seen daylight.. or nightlight, for that matter.

It didn’t matter to him. What did matter was the breach in the defense lines near the Southern border, where Dark Cacao Warriors fought day and night to keep the Licorice Monsters away.

A breach in defense meant disaster, especially in a kingdom where danger waited to strike behind every corner. It also meant Dark Cacao locked himself into the war room for several days, creating new strategies to fend off the fiends plaguing the kingdom.

The king himself had returned from a battle with the foul beasts a few days back, and had ended up injured in the process. He hadn’t notified anyone, lest they think their leader wasn’t capable of defending himself.

Files and reports were scattered over the large table, fallen ink pots, scrolls and quills covering the table. The king himself was pacing around the work surface with his hands behind his back, a distracted look in his sunken eyes. They were underlined with dark circles, a clear indication of a lack of sleep.

Unfortunately for him, Dark Cacao’s son was not stupid.. not in the slightest.

A knock on the door was ignored - or perhaps not perceived? - as Dark Cacao’s feet acted for his mind. The persistent walking was slowly forming a circle in the carpet. Dark Cacao’s eyes were unfocused.

The door was gently pushed open, but the boy that entered looked a little less soft.

“Father,” Dark Choco said.

Dark Cacao replied with nothing but a noncommittal hum.

“Father ,” Dark Choco repeated, stronger this time.

The prince stepped forward, grabbing his father and king by the shoulders to stop his walking. This worked to shake him out of his daze.. this might not have been as positive as Dark Choco hoped.

“Unhand me,” Dark Cacao hissed, his eyes narrowing to dangerous slits.

When Dark Choco didn’t listen, Dark Cacao angrily attempted to shake himself loose. When did his son get so strong? When did he get so weak?!

“Let go of me right this instant, boy!” Dark Cacao commanded, his voice low with fury.

“This is for your own bestwill, father,” Dark Choco murmured.

It hurt the young prince to see his father, the man who he greatly looked up to, in such a state. Frustrated because he wasn’t energised, and even more frustrated when his body was weaker with the lack of energy.

Dark Cacao, of course, saw weakness as a point that needed to be sharpened; more training on top of his work. Very, very unhealthy and very, very disapproved of by nine out of ten of your trusted healers.

Dark Cacao growled lowly as he felt his movements get slower, his eyes dulling as he was forced to stay still.

“Dark Choco,” Dark Cacao tried to push away once more, and failed just the same, “Let me go, please. As your king and father, unhand me . I have no time for your games!”

“Father.. listen to me. Listen to yourself! What if it had been me in your position? Would you have forced me to continue working?” Dark Choco said, putting the king in a comfortable chair with slight force.

A small glint of uncertainty shone in Dark Cacao’s eyes. Of course he wouldn’t have.

“That doesn’t matter!” Dark Cacao argued strongly. “You’re not in my position! You should know better than to defy my orders like this.. now let me get up-”

“No. If you don’t stop struggling right this instant, I will not hesitate to contact Pure Vanilla Cookie,” Dark Choco said.

“Don’t you dare.”

“Why?” Dark Choco’s good eye glinted mischievously. “Afraid he’ll make you sleep on the couch again?”

“I am not- he never made me do that!” Dark Cacao protested unconvincingly.

“Of course..” Dark Choco allowed himself a small chuckle, before continuing, "Has he looked at your wounds yet?”

“I have no idea what you are referring to.”

“Father..” Dark Choco shot Dark Cacao a strict look. “Have your wounds been treated yet?”

“My wounds were not severe-” Dark Cacao cut himself off with a small grimace. The constant pacing had done little to no good to his injuries.

“Father, for the sake of the witches!” Dark Choco sighed desperately. “For one so dead set on having every warrior fixed up after battle, you sure don’t take as good care of yourself as you should..”

Dark Cacao fixed him with a glance. “Mind your manners.”

Dark Choco turned his back to his father, walking towards the door to notify Pure Vanilla (Father to Dark Choco, husband to Dark Cacao) of his father’s untreated injuries, but not before muttering a small “Mind yourself ..”

Dark Cacao pretended he did not hear.

Chapter 19: Burden PT.2

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Dark Cacao Cookie wasn’t afraid of many things. Dragons could be domesticated, armies could be defeated, kingdoms could be conquered…

The only thing that truly brought shivers to his spine was Pure Vanilla Cookie, who was known to be extremely calm - until he wasn’t.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: Mentions of nightmares, implied injuries

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Prompt: "I was reading Burden and I really want a PT.2 where Pure Vanilla comes to the Dark Cacao kingdom because once again Dark Cacao is being as stubborn as a mule-"

“Father!” Dark Choco Cookie exclaimed desperately, chasing after the stubborn old man for the umpteenth time that night. “For Heaven’s sake, stay in bed! ”

Dark Cacao Cookie (aforementioned stubborn old man) did not acknowledge his son in any form of the word. As stubborn as he was, he was also old, which unfortunately meant his (much younger) son was just a little faster than him.

Very soon, Dark Cacao was struggling in a full Nelson, shouting bloody murder as he was forcibly dragged back to his bedroom. Dark Choco shot an apologetic look at the perplexed guards who had just been told they would get executed if they did not help their king right this instant.

“Please, for the love of God, don’t sneak away again, you need rest if you want to heal ,” Dark Choco said. He was just short of getting on his knees and begging for his father to stay put for the rest of the night - the prince needed his beauty sleep, too.

"Why put a border between healing and duties, when both drink greedily from my undrainable glass of concentration?" Dark Cacao asked wisely.

“That makes absolutely no sense,” Dark Choco deadpanned. “It does, however, convince me of the fact you need to fall asleep now. ”

“Are you telling me I’m acting delirious, boy?” Dark Cacao said angrily.

“I said no such thing.”

“You implied it, a crime far worse than telling me outright.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Dark Choco sighed. “Father, Pure Vanilla Cookie would not approve of your escaping sleep.”

“Aha, but Pure Vanilla Cookie is not here, now, is he?” Dark Cacao asked with a slight tilt of his head.

“Who is to say he isn’t?” Dark Choco said, raising his eyebrows right back at him.”

“Do not tell lies, boy-”

“DARK CALLEBAUT CHOCOLATE CACAO COOKIE!”

When Dark Choco looked back at his father after twisting his head in the direction of the angry shout, he saw Dark Cacao making a run for the window.

“Hey!” The prince yelped, jumping up to tackle the other to the floor.

They rolled over the floor in a childish wrestling match that involved a lot of hair-pulling and pushing faces away. They came to a stop at the feet of an extremely unimpressed Pure Vanilla Cookie.

“Vanilla, my love!” Dark Cacao exclaimed. “You must come to my aid, our rebellious son has finally decided to overthrow his poor father-”

“What?! That is absolutely not true-!” Dark Choco said indignantly, before he was cut off by a sigh from Pure Vanilla.

“You may drop the theatrics, Dark Cacao Cookie, I have received Dark Choco’s letter, who told me all about your little adventures out of the Citadel despite my explicitly telling you not to.”

Dark Cacao narrowed his eyes at his son. “Traitor.”

“Dark Choco, my dear, would you please retreat to your room for the night? I imagine it has been tiring to take care of this old rascal on your own,” Pure Vanilla said, stepping back to let both men up.

“I am not old, ” Dark Cacao said offendedly, before pausing and adding; “Nor am I a rascal. I am not twelve, Pure Vanilla.”

“Get in bed.”

“I have work to do, surely you understand-” Dark Cacao protested.

“Get in bed .”

“Yes, darling..” Dark Cacao said with a sigh, lying down with lowered shoulders.

All his hopes of escaping later throughout the night were destroyed as Pure Vanilla crawled under the covers with him.

“Close your eyes, Cacao,” Pure Vanilla murmured, wrapping his arms around Dark Cacao’s torso.

“I cannot,” Dark Cacao muttered back.

Pure Vanilla opened his own eyes, his staff resting uselessly against the wall, to meet the other’s gaze. He failed, as Dark Cacao was staring strictly at the ceiling.

“Why?”

“I.. am afraid. Of the nightmares.” Dark Cacao admitted. Why was he admitting this? He felt like a child.

A silence fell over the two rulers, and Dark Cacao looked down without moving his head to see if Pure Vanilla was still with him. He was, of course - but he was also doing the thing with his eyes, the thing Dark Cacao hated so much because it made him feel all sappy inside.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Dark Cacao snarled, but it came out less commanding and more pleading than he would’ve liked.

Pure Vanilla raised an eyebrow. “With love and compassion?”

“With false hope.”

“It’s not always futile to hold hope in your heart, my dear,” Pure Vanilla said kindly. “I would never give you hope for something I cannot give you. But my heart? That, I can.”

“So senile,” Dark Cacao growled, turning his head to the other side. Pure Vanilla smiled - the king seemed to have forgotten his neck and ears went just as red as his face whenever he blushed.

“I will be with you, Cacao, every step of the way,” Pure Vanilla said softly. “I will help you heal, physically and mentally, and so will your friends. So will Dark Choco. The nightmares don’t have to haunt you forever.”

Dark Cacao was silent for a second, trying to find the courage to speak without his voice acting up.

“Do you promise?” His voice cracked anyway, like a child’s -

“I promise,” Pure Vanilla murmured, pressing a kiss to Dark Cacao’s jaw. “I will be by your side forever, my love, even if you don’t always realise it. I will be here for you, just like you’re always here for me, for your citizens.”

Dark Cacao let out a hoarse chuckle that sounded more like a sob than anything. “You always did have such a way with words..”

Pure Vanilla chuckled quietly, before he closed his eyes to slip into the sweet world Moonlight Cookie had prepared for them. Dark Cacao followed his example.

That night, Dark Cacao slept better than he had in months.

Chapter 20: PURECACAO HEADCANONS

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

I love them so much <3

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: No prompt, i just wanted to put some thoughts on paper ><

• Sometimes, Dark Cacao wakes up in a wild panic in the middle of the night. Pure Vanilla knows it’s because he had a nightmare about Dark Choco.
• Dark Cacao gets heat strokes in the Vanilla Kingdom and Pure Vanilla gets undercooled in the Dark Cacao Kingdom, so they had a cottage built right on the border where the temperature was acceptable for both.
• When Pure Vanilla does visit, he always makes sure to bring a sweet treat from his Kingdom for the warriors of the Dark Cacao Kingdom. Dark Cacao pretends not to notice.
• Nobody knows this, but Dark Cacao absolutely adores gardening. It’s a wonderful feeling for him to have something so fragile yet so strong under his hands, something he can take care of without breaking. He was absolutely shattered when rabbits invaded his garden while both rulers were away.
• Following the headcanon above, Dark Cacao claims the garden is Pure Vanilla’s whenever someone visits. Nobody believes him, but they humour him anyway.
• Pure Vanilla found Dark Cacao sitting in his freezer the first time the warrior-king visited the Pure Vanilla Kingdom. Dark Cacao insisted he wanted to get ice cubes but got distracted.
• They have quite a lot of children, unofficial and official. On Pure Vanilla’s side, we have Custard Cookie III, Strawberry Crêpe Cookie and Pancake Cookie. Dark Cacao demands he stops adopting orphaned cookies, to which Pure Vanilla replies he has Caramel Arrow Cookie, Crunchy Chip Cookie, Dark Choco Cookie and has grown closer and closer with Wizard Cookie.
• Pure Vanilla is both an emotional and cheerful drunk. Dark Cacao either gets extremely quiet or loses himself in memories. Or, as seen before, tries to fight inanimate objects.
• While Pure Vanilla’s children are fairly young and up-to-date with slang, all of Dark Cacao’s children are grown. Dark Cacao almost had a panic attack when he got told he had ‘epic skibidi rizz’. Pure Vanilla found it mighty entertaining.
• People who have no sight don’t survive for long in the harsh climate of the Dark Cacao Kingdom, so Dark Cacao does not know what braille is. Pure Vanilla likes hearing his voice, so he tricked Dark Cacao into reading his favourite books out loud to him in the evening.
• Both are, as their rarity suggests, very old. Their bodies age slower, but Dark Cacao stopped throwing birthdays after he turned 50 and stopped counting the years when he turned 200. He had no idea why Caramel Arrow and Crunchy Chip made such a big deal out of celebrating his birthday when he turned 420.
• Because their bodies age so slowly, they had the body and voice of a twelve-year-old but the brains of a much older and wiser man. A little creepy, yes, but Dark Cacao used to love freaking ‘real’ adults out by speaking in extremely long and sophisticated sentences when he looked ten.
• Everyone jokes about Dark Cacao’s extremely convincing poker face. In reality, he just doesn’t know if someone is making fun of him or not if they don’t match their joke with any facial expression, so he’ll just stare at them until they clarify.
• Dark Cacao DOES NOT like Pure Vanilla Cookie’s staff. Pure Vanilla closes his eyes at night, so when Dark Cacao wakes up at three in the morning and sees a singular eye staring straight into his soul he (rightfully) freaks out.
• Dark Cacao cried when Caramel Arrow left for college.
• Pure Vanilla once put on an extremely elaborate lie; everyone kept asking him why he doesn’t like tomatoes, so he just said he was allergic. This does mean he cannot eat pizza, pasta or any of the sort when visiting friends, which upsets him greatly. Dark Cacao will sometimes ask for a container to take leftovers home so Pure Vanilla can eat it there. It’s a whole thing, but they’re too deep in to back out now.
• It’s well known that Dark Cacao actively avoids therapy, but Pure Vanilla skips his sessions as well because ‘others need it more’. Dark Cacao once forced him to go; a mistake, because the therapist immediately had a session with him, too.
• Pure Vanilla will go all-out for costume parties. Dark Cacao does not like dressing up, because it usually means leaving the vital parts of his body unprotected. They once went as Saint George and the Dragon (Pure Vanilla being the dragon and Dark Cacao being the knight) just so he could wear his beloved armour.
• Dark Cacao is deadly allergic to bees. He did not know this before coming to the floral and sweet Hollyberry Kingdom.
• Dark Cacao does not like PDA. At least, that’s what he tells himself as he makes no effort to stop Pure Vanilla’s kisses and hugs.
• Dark Cacao loves chess, but is really bad at it. He beams with pride when Pure Vanilla lets him win.

Chapter 21: DARK CACAO COOKIE AS YOUR FATHER!

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Because this old man needs a child to cheer him up <3

Father!Dark Cacao Cookie x GN!Child!Reader

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: Mentions of cigarettes, mentions of alcohol, mentions of assassination

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: No prompt, my own indulgent hcs teehee

• Needless to say, Dark Cacao gets EXTREMELY protective of you. He lost his son, he will not lose his remaining child.
• You got a partner? Oh, that’s cute. Are they prepared for his 275-question interrogation? What do they do for a living? What’s their mayor? Are they trained in any type of martial art? What do they love most about you? Are they prepared for the consequences of breaking your heart? Would they throw themselves in front of a bullet for you?
• He’s not very up-to-date with the norms of the current age. He’ll accept and love you if you’re gay or trans, but he might need Caramel Arrow or Crunchy Chip’s help with new terms.
• Extremely old-fashioned. You do not get to sleep in the same room as your partner before you get married.
• Dark Cacao will call you by your name in public, but has nicknames for you at home. ‘My little knight’, ‘Aegiya’ (Korean for ‘baby’), ‘my dear’.
• He finds cooking a very important skill, so you grew up watching him cook something every night. He almost cried when you were in your cooking-ramen-every-night-phase.
• You best believe he is not leaving your side after a failed assassination. He would rather host a meeting digitally (or, God forbid, host the meeting in your room) than leave you alone.
• You have to play at least one sport, one instrument and one martial art. He loves playing the piano along with your instrument of choice or training with you in his free time.
• He has to meet your friends at least seven times before you’re allowed to meet up with them without constantly being under a bodyguard’s careful watch.
• You’ve decided to marry someone of an extremely low rank? Good for you! If you look closely, you can see Dark Cacao banging his head against the wall in the background. Don’t worry, he’ll come around… eventually.
• Dark Cacao’s not a big fan of E-cigarettes. If he catches you vaping, he’ll sigh and tell you to smoke a cigarette like a normal person. Maybe he’ll realise he told you to smoke later in the night, which will result in a complete clearance of any type of cigarette in your room.
• He was so proud of you when you killed your first rabid animal, most likely a Dire Creamwolf. His advisors were more than a little concerned.
• The other Ancient Heroes absolutely adore you. Hollyberry Cookie fed you alcohol when you were nine (she was banished from the Kingdom for three months), Golden Cheese Cookie liked to fly really high up with you when you were a baby (Dark Cacao had a panic attack on the ground), White Lily Cookie will work in the royal garden with you and Pure Vanilla Cookie will do fun things with you and teach you a little bit of healing magic.
• Dark Cacao is a big fan of classical music, especially Bach’s Goldberg Variations. He lies awake at night when you’re in a phase and blast B.A.D 4 music all day and night.
• While Dark Cacao doesn’t always know how to show it, your opinion is extremely important to him. He already lost Dark Choco because he didn’t listen well enough (at least, so he thinks) he tries to be a better father for you.
• Hollyberry got him drunk (on ‘accident’) the day you left for college. He called you, moping because his only child had ‘left him’.
• He would literally pass through fire for you, but to eat the sweet things you consume religiously..? Most certainly not.
• You convinced him to come with you to one of your favourite bands once. It ended up being something his therapist would hear about.
• Dark Cacao likes musicals a lot better than movies, so you’ll be growing up with a lot of Lin Manual Miranda.

Chapter 22: The King And His Children

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

One biological son, one adopted daughter and one boy he fished from the dumpsters have been living with their king, the ‘man of ice’ who has ‘never shown emotion’.

Naturally, chaos ensues.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: "if u dont mind, can i req a fic of dark cacao raising dark choco, caramel arrow and crunchy chip in their early childhood? like the oldest of them in which you hc is a kid and the youngest is an infant, btw i love your finanarrow fic, love cacao straight up adopting carrow and then proceed to death threats financier. have a great day!"

Dark Cacao Cookie woke up early in the morning, which was very usual for him. What was not usual, however, were the screams that were coming from his downstairs kitchen. He opened his eyes, blinked, processed, and jumped out of bed to race downstairs.

He was met with a cloud of smoke and high-pitched screeching that seemed to come from his children.

“Don’t put the blanket on it, you moron!” A voice screamed, likely belonging to the oldest, Caramel Arrow Cookie. “It’ll only make it worse! We’re going to wake up father!”

Dark Cacao closed his eyes, taking a deep breath and counting to ten, just as his therapist told him to do. He got to three before shouldering the children away.

A flame that would’ve reached the ceiling if it wasn’t for the roof of the microwave was quickly put out by Dark Cacao throwing a bowl of water at it. Two seconds of silence, and the kitchen erupted with noise.

Dark Choco, who had made it to three years old without being in a life-or-death situation, had burst into tears and was screaming at the top of his little lungs, Caramel Arrow was trying to explain the situation, Crunchy Chip was screaming absolute nonsense and Dark Cacao’s ears were ringing.

“I didn’t do anything, I swear!” Caramel Arrow said loudly, gesturing wildly at Crunchy Chip. “He did, it’s always him! You need to put him back where you found him!”

“What?!” Crunchy Chip squeaked indignantly. “‘T’wasn’t, I swear! Dad, you gotta believe me, please don’t put me back there!”

“Nobody’s getting put back,” Dark Cacao sighed, opening a window to let the spoke out before rubbing his temples. “Please do tell me what in the world you were thinking.”

“I am so glad you asked,” Caramel Arrow started seriously. “You know, Crunchy Chip had this brilliant idea–”

“It wasn’t my idea, you came up with-!”

“Oh, that’s funny, because I could’ve sworn-”

“ Silence!”

The teenagers fell quiet, staring at Dark Cacao with big eyes. The king had rarely raised his voice at them, not for things like this.

“I don’t care who did what,” Dark Cacao said with another deep sigh. “I want to know why my kitchen caught on fire. What were you doing? And why did you involve Dark Choco? He just learned that Dire Cream Wolves are not his friends, I’d like to go a year or two without a phobia for cooking.”

“We were baking something,” Crunchy Chip said, his voice uncharacteristically small.

“Why? Why on Earth?” Dark Cacao’s voice was becoming increasingly more exasperated.

“..it’s father’s day tomorrow,” Caramel Arrow muttered. “We wanted to do something fun.”

Dark Cacao was silent for a few seconds, processing. That was sweet. Why was it on fire?

“Why did you light it on fire?” Dark Cacao asked aloud. “There is literally no reason for it to catch on fire. None. Nada.”

“The wrapping said we had to bake it for one hour at 180 °C, so we figured baking it for one minute at 1800°C would speed up the process,” Crunchy Chip said wisely.

Dark Cacao leaned back against the counter, ran his hand through his hair and let out a near-hysterical chuckle. “You cannot seriously be that stupid. I refuse to believe it. I caught you reading my advanced literature last night. You cannot truly have believed that.”

“I told him!” Caramel Arrow cried out. “He wouldn’t listen!”

“I’m not that stupid!” Crunchy Chip said unsurely. “Right..? Do you really think I’m stupid..”

“No,” Dark Cacao shook his head with yet another sigh, “I know you’re not stupid. You just do stupid things, sometimes. You can stop grinning, Caramel Arrow, I know you can be a little less responsible behind my back than you are to my face.”

Dark Choco babbled incomprehensibly, reaching upwards with his chubby little hands. Caramel Arrow let out a betrayed noise behind them.

“Sweet mother of the Lord above,” Dark Cacao whispered, picking Dark Choco up from the ground. “So smart, and so stupid. Can you believe this, little knight? You’re going to have to protect your siblings later, it seems.”

Dark Choco tugged at Dark Cacao’s hair with another babble, his maroon eyes gleaming.

Chapter 23: Good Old-Fashioned Chicken Soup

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Pure Vanilla Cookie had ended up with red eyes, a sore throat and a runny nose after wearing too little layers on his trip to the Dark Cacao Kingdom.. it didn’t take a healer to figure out what was wrong with him.

Luckily, Dark Cacao Cookie has just the remedy!

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff, Sickfic

Prompt: "can i request pure vanilla suffering from a cold because he visited the dark cacao kingdom without proper arraengements for the climate thinking that after all this years his body would have developed against the frozen land, turns out the one holding the light of truth was incredibly wrong, and know he gotta deal with the antiquated dark cacao kingdom medicine"

Pure Vanilla Cookie woke up a small hour after Dark Cacao Cookie did. He made his way downstairs towards the throne room, sniffling quietly. It seemed Dark Cacao had been right, and Pure Vanilla hadn’t prepared well enough for the cold.. oh, he already knew his husband was going to be insufferable about it.

His expectations were, as always, completely correct.

“Why is your nose running?” Was the first thing Dark Cacao said. Then, “Are you sick? Why are you sniffing?”

“Good morning to you too, my dear,” Pure Vanilla murmured sarcastically, approaching the other and nuzzling his face into Dark Cacao’s warm chest. “I slept fine, thank you, how was your night?”

“Don’t contaminate me,” Dark Cacao grumbled, inarguably not pulling away.

“Wouldn’t want to risk having to stay in bed all day, hm?” Pure Vanilla said without even bothering to hide his smile.

“That’s different. I have things to do. You , on the other hand, should be resting.” Dark Cacao turned from his healer, focusing back on the reports that had been resting on the left armrest of the throne.

“I cannot fall asleep in this condition,” Pure Vanilla sighed.

“This may come as a surprise to you, but I am not God. I cannot cure your cold with a snap of my fingers,” Dark Cacao said dryly.

“You don’t have anything against colds here?” Pure Vanilla asked, raising an eyeb

“Yes, but the leeches are scarce and I’d prefer to save them for a more dire situation.

Pure Vanilla’s eyebrow inhaled sharply through his nose (a mistake, because he had to sneeze immediately after). “The what now?”

“The leeches?” Dark Cacao said, his tone of voice taking that of a mother talking to her three-year-old. “The leeches that suck the illness out of your blood? By the Witches, don’t tell me you still use stale ale for colds in the Vanilla Kingdom..”

“No,” Pure Vanilla said, a little baffled. “No, we use paracetamol.”

It was Dark Cacao’s turn to look confused. “Do you seriously trust the tree root medicine?”

“Do you seriously trust leeches? Cacao, what in the world are you giving to your people when they’ve fallen ill?” Pure Vanilla’s eyes had opened just so his husband could see how much this bothered him.

“The usual,” Dark Cacao said vaguely.

“That says absolutely nothing,” Pure Vanilla replied. “I think I’m going to make a little visit to your medical facilities when my cold has passed.”

“I don’t know if that’s such a good-”

“Cacao, I’d rather bring a few dozens of paracetamol from my Kingdom to yours if it means not putting any leeches on your soldiers.”

“..hmgh,” Dark Cacao muttered, turning away from Pure Vanilla with a mildly displeased expression on his face. “Is chicken soup too good for the king of healers, or can he bring himself to force a spoonful down his throat?”

Pure Vanilla chuckled, the outer corners of his closed eyes crinkling. “Oh, it’ll have to do.”

Chapter 24: Like Moths To A Light

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

If there is one thing certain in this world, it’s that moths are attracted to light. A simple, scientific fact that is shown again and again by the dead moths found in or around oil lamps.

This attraction extends, of course, to the Moth King of the Dark Cacao Kingdom.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ──

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff, First Meeting

Prompt: "Can I request some Moth! Dark Cacao and Fairy King PV? https://www.tumblr.com/janayuga/778663661536460800/his-king?source=share Their arts is so SO good! And I really wanna see how they meet and just whichever you wanna write! Nothing angst please!"

The night was dark and the skies seemed to reach eternally to all but Dark Cacao Cookie. Dark Cacao knew the sky had to have an end, just as all things do - he was rather curious, however, where this end would be.

This curiosity was partly because he longed to go home to his kingdom and refused to admit he was lost.

The Moth King looked around, brows furrowed in irritation, as his flapping wings held him in the air. That was when he saw it from the corner of his eyes- there! Right there!

A light, a soft yellow swell that illuminated even through the thick roof of the forest. Dark Cacao fluttered towards it, eyes fixed on the light as if in a trance - which he was, perhaps, for all he knew at that very moment was that he needed to go closer.

He would write it off as an investigation later, a defence of his kingdom. He would tell his subjects he needed to know if this strange light could pose as a threat to his kingdom, and they would believe it. After all, what was their king but a cleverer, resolute version of them that knew not to give in to his desires?

As it seemed, Dark Cacao was no better than a hunting dog when spotting prey, relying solely on instincts. It might be his demise one day, but today was not the day he fell to an entrancing fire or a boiling hot lamp - today, the glow he was following seemed to belong to another being.

When Dark Cacao neared the figure, he could make out long, blonde hair and large, transluncent wings that fluttered through a cloth that seemed to consist solely off of a large leaf.

The stranger’s back was facing Dark Cacao, who creeped closer as quietly as he could. He – at least, Dark Cacao thought it was a he – seemed to tend to an animal of some sort, a winged creature that looked a lot like a small moth - but not quite.

Crack.

Dark Cacao’s head shot down to the fractured twig in front of him, just as the other’s head snapped to face him. Dark Cacao’s world seemed to stop as mismatched eyes met his own.

Time continued again when the stranger flew towards him, and Dark Cacao pulled his spear from his back.

“Halt!” The Moth King barked, lightly poking the tip of his weapon into the other’s delicate cloth. “State your identity and purpose!”

The stranger blinked, as if perplexed, before he chuckled. Chuckled. Had he no idea who he was facing?

Dark Cacao’s shock must have been present on his face, for the new acquaintance quickly cleared his throat and made a small bow.

“My name is Pure Vanilla Cookie, and my purpose is… being the monarch of these lands, I suppose.”

Dark Cacao was thrown off guard by this revelation for half a second, before he quickly regained his footing and prodded the other – Pure Vanilla Cookie – again.

“I don’t recall there being a leader to these lands.”

Pure Vanilla’s eyes glinted mischievously, but not unkindly. “Do you know where you are, friend? You look a little lost..”

“Lost?!” Dark Cacao growled. “I am not lost. I am perfectly well aware of where I am!”

“Of course. Please, let us not fight. Introduce yourself, I mean no harm,” Pure Vanilla said softly, gentle directing the spear away from his chest. “Tell me, friend, why have you come here? I see you are a Moth, your kingdom is far from mine.”

“I..” Dark Cacao was distracted by the pale, yellow light that seemed to grow brighter as he resheated his spear, before shaking his head to clear his mind. “My name is Dark Cacao Cookie. I am the king of the Dark Cacao Kingdom, and I came to… investigate the light that came from this place.”

Pure Vanilla raised an eyebrow at this. “You saw my light all the way from your kingdom..?”

Dark Cacao had to decency to flush red at the ears, clearing his throat. “Perhaps I.. strayed from my path a little.”

Pure Vanilla chuckled again, and Dark Cacao found he wasn’t upset at the sound. How could he, when all he could focus on was the bright light that radiated right in front of him?

“Ah, I forgot..” Pure Vanilla murmured curiously, “Moths are attracted to light, yes?”

“No,” Dark Cacao said without really listening, naturally denying any questions thrown his way. He stepped closer, placing a hand on Pure Vanilla’s wrist so he couldn’t pull back, eyes transfixed on the glow.

Dark Cacao was surprised to find small splotches of pink appearing in the aura surrounding them. He looked at Pure Vanilla’s face, saw just how close they were, and stepped back, his cheeks darkening significantly.

“Ah- my apologies, I didn’t-” Dark Cacao stammered, blinking twice.

“Oh, no, it’s completely fine, I should’ve pulled back-” Pure Vanilla was just as red as Dark Cacao.

Pure Vanilla chuckled nervously, and wished for the first time in his life that the pink splotches in his glow could disappear and be replaced with anything, anything else.

“Lost!” Dark Cacao said a little too loudly, nearby birds chirping indignantly as they startled. “Do you happen to have, ah, a map of sorts?”

“Yes, of course,” Pure Vanilla seemed to calm down at the opportunity to help, turning around hastily as he signed for Dark Cacao to follow.

The Moth King found himself mentally noting the other calmed down at being given a job to do - why, he didn’t know. It wasn’t as if he was going to see this.. this Pure Vanilla Cookie ever again…

Surely.

Chapter 25: Like Moths To A Light PT.2

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Months have passed since Pure Vanilla Cookie and Dark Cacao Cookie have last seen each other. Pure Vanilla hadn’t forgotten the promise with which Dark Cacao parted, and he could only hope he would live up to his pledge.

He did not know the Moth King was a man of his word.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: "PLEASE, A PART 2 FOR MOTHS TO A LIGHT, IT WAS SO GOOOOODDDDDD! Maybe where Dark Cacao makes it home, and introduces Pure Vanilla to his family? Or maybe Dark Cacao and his family and troops decided to vist pure vanilla kingdom under the guise of Treaty? Augh!! So many ideas!!!"

Pure Vanilla Cookie, the King of Faerie Kingdom, was patiently tending to a wounded youngling that had fallen from the trees, their wings too new and weak to save them. The damage wasn’t as bad as their relentless screeching might’ve suggested.

The healer was awakened from his peaceful thoughts at the sudden commotion outside his den, Faeries running left and right in wild panic. He made the little Faerie promise him to stay where he was, before rushing outside to see what was happening.

“Mercurial Knight!” Pure Vanilla called out, stopping one of the panicked knights, “What is happening?! Why are we running around like madmen?!”

“The Moths, sire!” Mercurial Knight shouted back. “They’ve finally decided to conquer the Faerie Kingdom! We’re preparing for war!”

Pure Vanilla blinked, his eyebrows furrowing. Impossible .

Dark Cacao had seemed so agreeable before… was he really planning to invade this kingdom? It just wasn’t that believable.

With a flap of his mighty wings, Pure Vanilla rose high above the crowd until he saw the one he was looking for; a cookie at least a head taller than everyone else, clothing in layers, armoured heavily.

“Dark Cacao Cookie!” Pure Vanilla cried out, diving towards the other. In an instant, twenty soldiers had their spears at his head.

“Halt!” Their leader shouted, a glint of panic in his eyes. “Do not attack the Faerie King! I repeat, DO NOT ATTACK PURE VANILLA COOKIE!”

The weapons were drawn back with slight reluctance, and Pure Vanilla found himself face-to-face with the Moth King, Dark Cacao Cookie.

“What in the world are you doing?!” Pure Vanilla put his hands on his hips, staring at Dark Cacao sternly. “Invading my kingdom, just like that? Hm?”

“I wasn’t,” Dark Cacao said, a little thrown off by the other’s strict tone. “I was planning to visit again and they just.. started screaming once we crossed the border.”

“ Really. ”

“Yes, really ! It’s not my fault they’re so skittish!” Dark Cacao protested. “Why would I want to conquer this kingdom? It’s at least half a moon cycle flying from yours to mine.”

Pure Vanilla held his gaze for a little while longer, before sighing softly. “I believe you.”

Turning to his people, he continued, “Let us calm down! These are the people of Dark Cacao Cookie, a noble king I’ve had the pleasure of meeting before. Rest assured, his men will not harm us - treat the soldiers as you would treat your family!”

Dark Cacao nodded, allowing his soldiers to scurry off. He stepped forward, opening his mouth to speak, before cutting off and clearing his throat again. “I.. apologise.. for the intrusion.”

Pure Vanilla raised an eyebrow, but his eyes twinkled kindly. “It sounded like it hurt you to apologise, Cacao.”

The Moth King looked away, letting out a huff. “It was a long flight, pardon me for being sore.”

Laughter escaped Pure Vanilla’s lips, and Dark Cacao felt his face redden more than it already was. He wondered if the light coming from Pure Vanilla had anything to do with the rushing of blood to his face. It must have, because the Moth King did not blush . He just didn’t.

“Come, friend,” said Pure Vanilla, arms outstretched, “Join me in my chamber. It would be my pleasure.”

“You are too kind,” Dark Cacao murmured, following the Faerie to the den he had frantically departed from just moments ago.

“It’s a lot more spacious on the inside,” Dark Cacao observed, ducking his head to enter the house. “How did you manage to do it?”

“Magic,” Pure Vanilla said mysteriously, disappearing into the back of his house.

Dark Cacao’s eyes inspected every little part of the home he had entered, a survival instinct he had obtained when he was young. It was big, but cozy nonetheless. Scrolls and books were scattered over all of the surfaces, whether that be the floor, the desks or the bookshelves they were supposed to be in.

It had its charm.

Dark Cacao straightened his back. A mistake, apparently, because he immediately bumped his head into the ceiling. He hissed, turning around - only to immediately walk into a wooden beam.

Pure Vanilla, alerted by Dark Cacao’s agonised grunt, returned to find the Moth King sitting on the ground, rubbing his forehead with a pained expression on his face. “Your ceilings should not be this low.”

Pure Vanilla managed to keep his straight face, but Dark Cacao could tell by the sparkles in his eyes that he was trying his best not to laugh.

“Oh, go on, then,” Dark Cacao grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest. “Don’t let me stop you from laughing, I can tell you have trouble holding it in. You’ve got a terrible poker face, really.”

“Don’t tell me you actually like hearing me laugh?” Pure Vanilla teased, crouching down by Dark Cacao.

“You are twisting my words- eh?!” Dark Cacao’s hand instinctively reached for the sleek dagger on his belt when Pure Vanilla’s hands hovered over his head. “What in the world do you think-”

“Oh, hush,” Pure Vanilla tutted, his yellow glow spoiling his annoyed act, “Be a good soldier and let me heal you.”

Nobody had ever talked to Dark Cacao that way. Pure Vanilla used his stunned silence to heal the throb in his head.

“Hmph,” Dark Cacao turned his head away. They were way too close for his liking. “..thank you.”

Pure Vanilla cupped his cheeks, the glow surrounding him spotted with pink. “Don’t look away, Cacao. I’m not done yet.”

“Do you have to hold my face for that, or what?” Dark Cacao muttered, but he found he couldn’t pull his gaze away from those mismatched eyes.

Pure Vanilla chuckled, and Dark Cacao frowned. “What?”

Pure Vanilla didn’t answer.. Dark Cacao didn’t need to know how cute his fluttering wings were.

“How long are you planning to stay for..?” Pure Vanilla murmured, thumb stroking absentmindedly over a small scar on Dark Cacao’s jaw.

"Hm.. a week or two, perhaps.. I must discuss it with my men first. Crunchy Chip Cookie gets homesick easily,,” Dark Cacao said.

“It would be my honour if you’d remain here, during those weeks.”

Dark Cacao’s eyes still hadn’t found the courage to pull away. “..if you insist.”

Chapter 26: THAT BOY NEEDS THERAPY!

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

After.. recent events, everyone is fairly certain Dark Cacao Cookie needs some form of therapy. That is to say, everyone but Dark Cacao himself. According to the king, he’s completely fine and the nightmares aren’t that bad for his sleep schedule.

Pure Vanilla Cookie is their best shot at getting through to him.

(PRACTICING FIRST PERSON/PRESENT TENSE)

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Prompt: None

I was sitting in my office when my husband, Pure Vanilla Cookie, had interrupted my work. The moment I saw the smile he wore, I knew he was going to make me do something I did not enjoy in the slightest. My mind raced with all the possibilities when he cut me off to tell me outright.

“I would like to have a little talk with you,” Pure Vanilla said.

For those of you who are unaware, ‘a little talk’ means ‘therapy’. I greatly dislike therapy. Pure Vanilla is fully aware of this.

I now realise he is still waiting for an answer.

“No,” I tell him. He frowns at me.

“Cacao, you can’t say that,” Pure Vanilla says. His voice takes a more disappointed tone, one I really dislike. I’m really good at disliking things.

“I can, actually,” I reply, frowning back at him. “I don’t want to ‘have a little talk with you’ when your voice is like that.”

Pure Vanilla’s frown deepens, as if asking me why. I don’t give his frown an answer. He can use his words if he wants an answer.

“You have to talk to someone, my dear,” Pure Vanilla murmurs. “It isn’t healthy to keep all your feelings locked up.”

“It seems there is a lot I can’t do,” I say sharply. I’m acting like a child.

“Quit acting like a child,” Pure Vanilla sighs. I give him a pointed look, to show him this doesn’t bother me because I thought of it first.

“I don’t want to talk,” I say again. “I don’t want anyone in my head.”

“Cacao. I won’t get in your head, I promise. I just.. want you to talk about how you’re feeling,” Pure Vanilla replies softly.

Sometimes, I wonder if he knows me at all.

He seems to pick up on my swiftly impairing mood and detracks, cupping my face in his palms. The only reason I lean into it is because my office is awfully cold. I let open a window because of that damned incense Affogato Cookie keeps leaving around.

“The loss of your son has been hard on you,” Pure Vanilla continues, “And the loss of your warriors, although a hallucination, had an impact on your mental health as well. Please, talk to me.”

“I am fine,” I grumble.

I start tapping my fingers in impatience to let Pure Vanilla know he needs to wrap it up, but he seems to take it as stress. I know this because he lets out a noise that he also makes when he notices a wounded sheep. I hate pity and I am not a wounded sheep. I wonder if Pure Vanilla knows this.

“I am not a sheep,” I say. He looks at me funny.

“Cacao, promise me you’re telling the throat. Promise me you’re doing okay.”

“I promise I’m telling the truth,” I lie.

“You don’t look like it. You look like you’re moping because I won’t let you continue working,” Pure Vanilla points out.

I let him know I do not mope.

“Brooding, then,” Pure Vanilla sighs. “My point still stands. I either drag you to therapy or you talk to me about what happened in Beast Yeast.”

“I’m talking to you now, does that count?” Dark Cacao asked.

“No.”

I frown at him.

He ignores me completely – how discourteous – and continues talking about the dangers of isolating one’s mind and soul and all that useless stuff. I ignore him back and start focusing on my paperwork again. He swats me on the back of my head and I send him a betrayed look. He isn’t swayed by it in the slightest.

“Very well, then..”

I look up just in time to be grabbed by the back of my cloak and dragged off my chair.

“Put me down!” I shout, but it’s of no use. I am harshly removed from my office by a healer who should not be this strong. “Fine, I’ll talk!”

He abruptly drops me, causing me to land on the hard floor unceremoniously. I glower at nearby Watchers and they scurry away.

Therapy it is, then.

Chapter 27: Tongues & Teeth

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Pure Vanilla Cookie had always enjoyed forming alliances so much more than Dark Cacao Cookie. It just came so natural to the healer - cookies seemed to be attracted to his kindness like moths to a light.

Dark Cacao didn’t mind.. not until Clotted Cream Cookie, at least.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff, mild Hurt/Comfort

Prompt: "I love your writing and it had me thinking what would dark cacao cookie would do if he was jelly because a cookie was flirting with his husband. But I hope you have a good day or night!"

 

Pure Vanilla Cookie chuckled at a joke Clotted Cream Cookie told, gently squeezing Dark Cacao Cookie’s arm as the corners of his eyes crinkled. “Isn’t that so amusing, my dear?~”

“Hilarious,” Dark Cacao replied, his dark eyes boring into Clotted Cream’s with a mildly murderous glance.

The young consul paid the angry king no mind, and continued talking to Pure Vanilla with an overly cheerful tone. Hell, if Dark Cacao didn’t know better, he’d think Clotted Cream was flirting .

It turned out, as the night progressed, that Dark Cacao did not know better. The armrest of his chair was starting to crack with how much force he was practicing onto him, and his vicious gaze hadn’t left Clotted Cream once. Even the consul was beginning to notice the dangerous glance.

“Do I have something on my face, sire..?” Clotted Cream asked light-heartedly.

Dishonour and shame, Dark Cacao thought.

“Nothing of the sort,” Dark Cacao said.

The king stood from his chair briskly, Pure Vanilla’s hand falling off of its place on his wrist. The healer looked up, his eyes closed but his eyebrows furrowed in concern. “Cacao-”

“You will excuse me,” Dark Cacao muttered, walking out of the room through the main entrance.

“Is he okay?” Clotted Cream asked.

“Oh, he said ‘you will excuse me’ instead of ‘will you excuse me’,” Hollyberry Cookie said dryly. “That means he’s out for blood. You would be wise to watch your tone, consul — Dark Cacao Cookie is already upset by your continuous asking for his Souljam, you really don’t want to mess with him further.”

Clotted Cream opened his mouth to reply when Pure Vanilla stood up as well, albeit a lot softer than Dark Cacao had done moments ago. “I shall check up on him.”

“Oh, please, I insist you let one of the maids do it for you-!” Clotted Cream protested.

“Consul.” Pure Vanilla shot him a strict look. “I will check in on my husband whenever I please.”

As Pure Vanilla left the room, he just barely caught Clotted Cream whispering; “Husband..?”

Pure Vanilla shook his head with a sigh and a small smile, walking to where he knew Dark Cacao would be angrily waiting.

And right his predictions were; Dark Cacao was moodily pacing in the guest room he had been forced to begrudgingly accept by none other than his husband dear. The day Dark Cacao slept in that cold tent outside was the day Pure Vanilla was six feet under.

“Cacao, my dear..” Pure Vanilla murmured, sitting on the bed. “Why did you flee?”

“I did not flee! I am not in there anymore for that.. that wretched boy’s own safety!”

Pure Vanilla raised an eyebrow, egging Dark Cacao on to continue.

“Pure Vanilla, I know you are blind, but you are not an idiot. You knew what he was doing! You knew he was brazenly courting you!” 

Dark Cacao watched in disbelief as a chuckle escaped his husband’s lips. “Vanilla, are you laughing at me?!”

“Oh, I do apologise,” Pure Vanilla smiled, but the corners of his eyes crinkled mischievously. “But you are acting rather silly, my dear.”

“Silly?!” Dark Cacao repeated indignantly.

“Yes, silly,” Pure Vanilla said as he gently pulled Dark Cacao onto the bed beside him. “You know I would never give in to anyone’s advances, my love. You are the only one for me… forgive me for finding it silly that you keep forgetting.”

“I did not forget,” Dark Cacao grumbled, leaning into Pure Vanilla’s touch reluctantly. “But I think it’s ‘rather silly’ that you just let him talk to you like.. that. ”

“Are you jealous, Cao..?”

Dark Cacao stared at him. “Someone is hitting on my husband, of course I’m jealous.”

Pure Vanilla laughed again, leaning against Dark Cacao’s chest. “Oh, you silly, hard-headed man.. don’t pout, love. It’s quite endearing when you throw little fits.”

Dark Cacao glared at him. He needn’t say a word, for his eyes portrayed all the indignance he felt for his show of emotion being called a ‘fit’.

“Please, my dearest,” Pure Vanilla murmured softly. “Let us return to the dining room, this time in peace. I know you do not enjoy Clotted Cream Cookie’s presence, but I hope you can rest assured knowing my affections go out to you, and you only.”

Dark Cacao sighed, before nodding.

“Very well.. but I expect to have you all to myself after.”

Chapter 28: THE DARK CACAO FAMILY x READER

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Including my Dark Cacao family HCs this time yay!

Father!Dark Cacao Cookie x GN!Child!Reader

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: Mentions of nightmares

Genre: Headcanons, Angst, Fluff

Prompt: "Can you do more of the Dark Cacao headcanons? I really like reading your short stories :)"

• You’re pretty much unsupervised. Dark Cacao is home about three hours a week, and your siblings are busy and important figures to the Dark Cacao Kingdom.
• That is, however, not to say important events won’t be celebrated. As the Kingdom’s beloved heir, every birthday is a big deal. Dark Cacao made the mistake of wanting to work on your fifth birthday; auntie Hollyberry tied him to a chair while you blew out your candles.
• Caramel Arrow and Crunchy Chip, your older siblings, can be just as protective as your father. They have secretly followed you on various dates. It is safe to say Caramel Arrow’s disguises are a lot more discreet than Crunchy Chip’s.
• Stoicism is a hereditary trait of the Dark Cacao kids that Crunchy Chip did not inherit. You and Caramel Arrow find great joy in teasing him everytime he flushes red in the presence of a certain Hollyberian bodyguard…
• Dark Cacao’s expressions can be seen as incredibly apathetic to anyone who doesn’t know him. You, who has hung around him for your entire life, can read him like an open book. He looks a lot like his remaining son when he sees the monarch of the Pure Vanilla Kingdom.
• Dark Cacao gets really upset when your friends or partner playfully insult you, as he has trouble distinguishing real slander from friendly slander.
• I’m not accusing you of anything, but… autism certainly runs in the family.
• Dark Cacao sleeps VERY lightly, so whenever you and Crunchy Chip/Caramel Arrow pull all-nighters and giggle just a little too loudly, there’s a grumpy, half-asleep king banging on your door.
• You and Crunchy Chip try literally everything to set your dad up with a new queen, but he’s so picky! She’s too submissive, her magic is too weak, she doesn’t have the bite he’s looking for… the two of you realise what you’ve been doing wrong when he starts smiling like an idiot during Pure Vanilla’s stay at the castle.
• You and Caramel Arrow will often bake, usually far past midnight. While the two of you are extremely careful and Caramel Arrow has extremely good reflexes, you once dropped the steel bowl you were mixing dough in on the hardwood floor.. What did I say about Dark Cacao being a light sleeper?
• Dark Cacao cried when you snuck when you were about six, thinking you got abducted.
• Living under 24/7 observation and constant protection of several bodyguards and the King himself has made you quite sneaky. At this point, Caramel Arrow is the only one who can see you snake out of the Citadel late at night.
• You and your siblings sometimes do those youtube challenges, like ‘eating Hollyberian candies’ or ‘try not to laugh with water in your mouth’. You once got Dark Cacao to participate. He threw up after a bite of a Spooky Muffin.
• While Dark Cacao, Caramel Arrow and you can handle horror movies very well (at your own degrees, of course), Crunchy Chip is TERRIFIED. He’ll cling onto whoever’s next to him at the time, claiming he’s ‘protecting them from nightmares’.
• Dark Cacao does actually suffer from nightmares - not because of scary movies, but because of the large amount of trauma he experienced throughout his life and his inability to deal with it mentally and emotionally. He’ll sometimes wake up screaming and sweating like a dog; fifty percent of the time, the nightmares are about Dark Choco’s betrayal. The other half is about his remaining children.
• Following the headcanon above, Dark Cacao has to check on every single one of his doughlings after a nightmare, which can take a while. You and your siblings have learned to get to his room immediately after loud, anguished cry coming from the royal bedroom.

Chapter 29: Reconciliated

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

The Royal Family of the Dark Cacao Kingdom has grown, but an empty spot always remained, waiting to be filled.

Finally, a lost prince makes it home.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Warnings: None

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff

Prompt: "Please Caramel Arrow Cookies Wife, I need a fic where the Dark Caco and his doughlings, and his husband Pure Vanilla ALL reconcile with Dark Choco Cookie. Please, I want there ro be s happy ending! Maybe he'll talk about his new life in Cookie Kingdom? I dunno, BUT PLEASEE WAHHH!!"

Dark Cacao Cookie was in the War Chamber, discussing how they would further the protective measures against the Licorice Sea with his generals, when one of the younger Watchers burst into the room.

The Second Watcher opened his mouth with a frown, ready to berate the apprentice for interrupting an important meeting, when the king raised a hand to silence him.

“Speak, boy,” He said, glancing over at the Second Watcher. “Make it quick.”

The younger Watcher took a second more to catch his breath, when he blurted out the message he had been sent with. “There are sightings of a stranger roaming the borders, sire; Caramel Arrow Cookie believes it might be the Dark Choco Cookie!”

The room filled with a tension heavier than the one that had been there before, and Dark Cacao’s court held their breath. No-one had dared utter the Prince’s name in decades – not around the king, at least. Every time the wretched name fell, Dark Cacao’s mood soured greatly, and he would be snappy for the remainder of the day.

Every time – but not now.

When Dark Cacao spoke again, his voice was barely more than a whisper, a prayer. “..is she certain?”

He knew that, if Caramel Arrow had seen it, it was unquestionable. A small piece of his heart wished it was so – that his boy was back in his Kingdom, within reach. But the bigger piece braced itself. It braced itself for the disappointment that he had learned to live with, the disappointment whose ugly face kept roaring up inside the king every time someone had thought they had seen the prince.

“As certain as she has ever been, your Majesty!” The Watcher saluted and turned to leave, but not before adding, “Lord Pure Vanilla Cookie has already been informed!”

Dark Cacao wasn’t sure if he was still breathing.

Within a minute, the meeting had been dismissed, and Dark Cacao was rushing through the halls of the dark Citadel, all lessons of composure forgotten. Pure Vanilla was already with their other children, Crunchy Chip Cookie and Caramel Arrow Cookie.

It was shattering to see the hope in his husband’s unseeing eyes, open for this special occasion. Dark Cacao forced the walls in his mind back up, refusing to show weakness. If it was another trick, he would have to be the one to pull the family together again.

Expect, it wasn’t.

Dark Cacao saw red eyes before the stranger removed his hood, and a choked sound that might’ve been a sigh as well as something weaker left his throat as his gaze met his son’s.

“Your Majesty,” Dark Choco Cookie said, his voice a little uncertain. “I- I have come in peace, hoping for a chance to redee-”

His rehearsed speech was cut off when Pure Vanilla tossed his arms around his shoulders, his shoulders shaking as he sobbed. His speech was slurred with tears, and Dark Choco could only make out the words ‘my son’ and ‘my little warrior’.

Dark Cacao remained where he was. Not because he was angry or upset – but because he didn’t know what to do, where to look, what to say. He rarely felt this helpless, but when standing one-on-one with the face that had been haunting his dreams for so long.. It was too much.

Dark Cacao continued staring as Crunchy Chip and Caramel Arrow ran past him, fast to reach their lost brother. They joined Pure Vanilla in his tackle-hug, and something inside Dark Cacao broke.

Damn to the Kingdom, damn to it all!

Dark Cacao didn’t care who watched him stumble towards his son, didn’t care who watched him collapse in front of his boy . His arms sought to hold, and so they did. They held as his shoulders shook and Dark Choco cried in his arms, as if he was seven again and just scraped his knees.

“My boy,” Dark Cacao whispered, his voice hoarse with tears he didn’t dare free, lest they open the floodgates. “My son. You have come back..”

Dark Choco struggled to keep his composure, and with the arms of his family around him, he gave it up. He had struggled for so long, wandered around endlessly in search of purpose he thought he had forfeited in his home country, carefully bottling up emotions he deemed as weak in his mind.

They remained like that for a couple more minutes, before Dark Cacao pulled away 

“You are as thin as a rake!” Dark Cacao said, his voice cracking on the last few words.

“I have not had much to eat besides raw cacao beans,” Dark Choco sniffled drily. Crunchy Chip, who had tried to eat a cacao bean when he was three and had tasted nothing but the bitter fruit for weeks, let out a startled gasp.

“I knew it,” Caramel Arrow whispered. “I knew it was you. I thought I was wrong, I thought my mind was playing tricks on me.”

Dark Choco smiled slightly. “It was hard escaping your watchful eyes for all these months.”

Dark Cacao’s head shot up. “You’ve been here for how long -?!”

Pure Vanilla Cookie, who had been silent until now, helped his son up.

“Come, my star,” the Healer whispered, his hold tight, as if Dark Choco might fade away if he let go, “You must be exhausted. We will discuss your actions later.”

Dark Choco shot a slightly anxious look at his father (who had clearly wanted to talk a little bit more about his ‘lost’ son’s hiding between his people), but Dark Cacao only sighed. “Listen to your father, boy. I.. understand.”

He didn’t, which was very obvious, but Dark Choco appreciated the sentiment.

Dark Cacao followed close behind as Pure Vanilla and Dark Choco made their way back to the Citadel, Crunchy Chip and Caramel Arrow staying behind to inform the guards on watch what had happened.

Dark Choco realised with a start that it was very unlikely that he could escape his father’s watchful eyes during the following months.

Perhaps it was for the better. He didn’t really care anyway.

He was home.

Notes:

A/N: long break, i hope the writing is still adequate :-)

Chapter 30: Thin Ice

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Pure Vanilla Cookie’s kindness is not inexhaustible. Sometimes, he excuses himself from the public to retire to his room in the castle, and the doors lock for an hour or so. During those times, nobody is allowed to disturb him, not even his husband..

So why in the world was this.. this Vanillian premier allowed to visit him?

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Genre: Fluff, Jealousy

Warnings: None

Prompt: "if you're still taking requests for purecacao, can you pretty please write more jealous dark cacao?? (only if you want!!)"

 

Dark Cacao Cookie sat on a chair outside of Pure Vanilla Cookie’s room, reading the scroll in his hands. The monarch of the Vanilla Kingdom had one of those days; a day where every word, every touch, every breath on his face felt overstimulating, and he had to lock himself away.

Dark Cacao understood all too well, of course, and had learned to respect his partner’s wishes over the decades. He could still feel the pain in his bones from when he was banished to the couch for intruding on Pure Vanilla’s alone time…

Pure Vanilla’s servants (or friends, as he insisted on calling them) had been so polite as to offer Dark Cacao a chair as he tried to get his work done. It was a little difficult concentrating in the Vanillian castle, with all its sweet smells and bright colours, but he would manage. For his husband.

Dark Cacao was disturbed from his work when a cookie passed him, a hand raised to knock on Pure Vanilla’s door.

“I would not, were I in your place,” Dark Cacao said, not looking up from his paper.

“Oh, it’s okay,” the other cookie smiled. “His Majesty asked for me.”

This got Dark Cacao’s attention.

He looked up curiously, studying the cookie in front of him. He had short, blonde hair that curled up to his ears. Blue eyes shone brightly, familiar in a way Dark Cacao couldn’t place. His robes were similar to Pure Vanilla’s coat, and a white cloak was attached to the stranger’s shoulders.

“I doubt it,” Dark Cacao replied. “Who might you be, if I may..?”

“My name is Premier Custard Cream Cookie,” the other said. “Now, please, I would hate to make Pure Vanilla Cookie wait any longer.”

Dark Cacao scoffed to himself as the cookie – Premier Custard Cream Cookie, apparently, horribly long name – entered Pure Vanilla’s chamber, expecting him to be sent away immediately…

The scroll nearly tore in his hands when the newcomer was instead met with excitement.

Dark Cacao stood up slowly, eyes darkening slightly.

Okay. If this is how it is.

So Dark Cacao Cookie, Pure Vanilla’s god-damned husband, couldn’t bother him, but one of his premier’s could? Okay. Fine. If that was how it was.

Dark Cacao stalked off angrily, subconsciously crumpling the paper in his hand.

In hindsight, he knew he was being silly. Getting this upset over such a small incident was childish, immature. But he just couldn’t help it.

Over the next couple days, Dark Cacao noticed Premier Custard Cream a lot more. He’d be at court meetings, he would smile at Pure Vanilla in the town square, he would coincidentally show up in Pure Vanilla’s garden…

It drove Dark Cacao mad.

At the moment, he was silently watching the many photos in the halls of the Vanilla Castle – one in particular, actually.

It was an old picture, Dark Cacao guessed it to be around fifty years old. There were only two people on it; his dear Pure Vanilla Cookie, and his new-found nemesis.

They stood quite close on the yellowed photograph, one of Pure Vanilla’s arms around Premier Custard Cream’s shoulders as the latter held a freshly-baked baby dough.

Unease churned in the bit of Dark Cacao’s stomach as he realised he didn’t actually know what Pure Vanilla had been up to in the years where Dark Cacao thought him to be lost, after Dark Enchantress Cookie’s attack.

What if he had found someone else to keep him company? Premier Custard Cream seemed a lot more pleasant than Dark Cacao.

The king was painfully reminded of his own shortcomings.. he lost himself in his work, and he probably didn’t give Pure Vanilla enough attention. He was too cold, too strict, too stoic. He never really did any big gestures, aside from the occasional flowers and walks through the forest.

Premier Custard Cream probably gave him chocolates twice a week.

Dark Cacao played with the hem of his long sleeves, eyebrows furrowed. His conscious mind knew Pure Vanilla would never do such a thing. He was loyal, through and through.

In his unconscious mind, something stirred.

 

Dark Cacao’s resolve broke a week later, just as Premier Custard Cream stood up from the bench he and Pure Vanilla had been sitting on, walking off. Dark Cacao took his place.

Pure Vanilla's smile faded slightly as he felt something was off, turning his head to face his husband. He couldn’t see, so he had only gotten better at one’s emotions, especially if they were as close to him as Dark Cacao.

“Are you alright, my dear..?” Pure Vanilla asked, putting his hand on top of Dark Cacao’s bigger one. “You seem tense.”

Dark Cacao was quiet for a few moments, his free hand drumming on the bench timidly, before finally answering.

“If there is something you want to tell me, please do it now.”

Pure Vanilla’s eyebrows raised slightly. “Not as far as I know.”

“I won’t get upset,” Dark Cacao said. “I promise. Just tell me.”

“Is this about the books I took from your library..?” Pure Vanilla asked carefully.

Dark Cacao frowned at him. “The what ?”

“Nothing,” Pure Vanilla said quickly, giving his husband’s hand a quick squeeze before continuing. “If something is bothering you, please do tell me – you always get so grumpy when you bottle your feelings up for too long.”

“I do not.”

“You do.”

“It’s.. about that man you’ve been seeing lately,” Dark Cacao admitted. “Premier Custard Cream Cookie.”

“Oh, yes!” Pure Vanilla’s face brightened up like Dark Cacao told him he won a million coins. “Isn’t he wonderful?”

Dark Cacao pulled his hand away from Pure Vanilla’s. “Ah. It’s like that.”

“‘Like that’?” Pure Vanilla parroted, frowning as Dark Cacao stood up. “My love, what are you talking about?”

“You’re very excited to see him. More than me.”

Pure Vanilla let out a chuckle. “Well, yes, but that is because I haven’t seen him in so long.”

“So you admit it..?” Dark Cacao asked quietly.

“Admit that I’ve missed him? Why, yes, of course. My sister is always so worried about her only son, I rarely get to see him!” Pure Vanilla chattered cheerfully. “Last time I saw him, he was just a wee boy, up to my knee…”

The rest of Pure Vanilla’s story was lost to Dark Cacao as he simply stared at the healer.

“Sister?” He repeated, cutting of Pure Vanilla’s story about the boy wanting to become a pirate at first. “That cookie- is your nephew?”

“Why, yes, of course, what did you think?”

Dark Cacao said nothing, but he did sit down next to him. “..Nothing.”

Pure Vanilla’s eyes shot open when he realised what had bothered his husband.

“You thought I loved him!”

Dark Cacao’s cheeks flushed a slight red as he sputtered for a defence. “Well- You seemed so close! You let him in your room!”

“You thought I was being unfaithful!” Pure Vanilla cried out, leaning against his poor husband as his mouth quivered with barely held in laughter. “I will be telling him this, my dear .”

“You will not.”

“Oh, yes I will!~”

Dark Cacao grumbled something under his breath (something Pure Vanilla was glad young Dark Choco hadn’t picked up yet), avoiding his husband’s unseeing gaze. The healer intertwined their hands, a smile on his face as he pressed a small kiss to Dark Cacao’s cheek. “You silly man.”

Dark Cacao did not pull away.

Chapter 31: BERSERK!DARK CACAO X CHILD!USER (PURECACAO)

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

 

PureCacao, DC!Family and Beserk!Dark Cacao headcanons :-)

 

A/N: anon you are so goated this is such an awesome request

 

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Genre: Fluff, headcanons

Warnings: None

Prompt: "If your doing requests I want to see HC for Berserk Dark Cacao both in Purecacao and in Child!Y/N. Like imagine he just turns into a freaking beast I need to know how this goes on."

 

 

• Dark Cacao only transforms when he’s extremely agitated and his Souljam tries to calm him down with extreme measures.
• ^ This includes stuff happening to you, your siblings or Pure Vanilla. Dark Cacao’ll get upset when something attacks his Kingdom, yes, but he needs to lose complete control of himself in order to transform into his berserk form.
• Dark Cacao can feel when he starts slipping, so he’ll excuse himself from present company to a special room he had created specifically for situations like these, with chains and strengthened walls so he can keep those around him safe.
• Pure Vanilla Cookie hates the aforementioned room, and has tried to convince Dark Cacao to get rid of it to no avail. You are under no circumstance allowed to enter the room.
• Dark Cacao was worried sick that the whole berserk-thing was hereditary, and with funny claws or pure white eyes.
• Dark Cacao gets better at controlling his berserk form gradually, especially with Pure Vanilla’s help. At this point, he has regained most of his mind and sensibility. 
• Once, overcome with curiosity, you snuck into the room you saw your father rush into. Seeing him turn into a monster-like, weeping creature was a bit of a shock, but you learned to enjoy the way he could lift your whole body in one of his great claws, or put you on his head so you could ‘fly’.
• You drew Berserk Dark Cacao once. Your nanny tried to have you admitted to a psych ward after seeing it.
• Dark Cacao is a little more closed off after his first transformation by Pomegranate Cookie’s magic, but he opens like a flower when training with you or reading with Pure Vanilla.
• If there is one thing Dark Cacao likes, it’s grounding you. There’s nothing in the world that gives him the same feeling of safety when he knows you’re with him and not allowed to leave your room.
• If the punishment is unreasonable, Pure Vanilla will un-ground you. Dark Cacao has found there is nothing he can do about that.
• If you’re creative or artistic, Dark Cacao will let you have charcoal, ink and scrolls to explore your passion. He might be indifferent about the drawings you give him throughout the years, but there is one secret, locked drawing in his desk that seems to overflow with them…
• Dark Cacao’s eyesight is very good, but he goes extremely bad with bright light. Going outside is fine, but watching an edit of your current favourite character with flashing strobes and 0.1 second clips almost gives him a seizure.
• Out of both of your parents, Pure Vanilla spends the most time with you, teaching you to love the creatures around you and teaching you the art of healing. Six-year-old you almost had a heart attack when he squashed a spider under his shoe.
• He, surprisingly, loves talking shit with you. You’ll say most things, of course, but he’ll nod along and slip in some things Caramel Arrow told him about the object of your conversation.
• Freakishly good memory. You’ll get a raspberry cake on your seventeenth birthday because you picked some from Pure Vanilla’s garden when you were three.
• You will remain his child. When you’re six? Child. When you’re twenty? Child. When you’re fifty-eight with a partner and four children? Child.
• The moment you’re married, he’s going to start pressuring you for grandbabies.
• If you choose to have children, there is a very high chance they will be missing 50% of the time to ‘go play with grandpa’. He’s incredibly sweet to your children (as all grandparents are), so they don’t believe your dramatic stories from your childhood.
• Dark Cacao is a wonderful writer with a large vocabulary, but.. not much of an artist.
• Sometimes, you’ll add little doodles to the letters you send him. He tried to draw something back once; you thought it was a squirrel for years, until he nervously asked you what you thought of his drawing of you.
• Golden Cheese Cookie gifted the both of you a phone after his so-manyth complaint of being unable to stay in touch with it. He could not figure out how to work the buttons on FaceTime; you ended up looking at a screen of his floor for the whole call.
• Following the headcanon above; his brain cannot comprehend that such a small device brings over his words loud and clear, so he shouts into the phone.

Notes:

@dreamyy_sugar, i dont know if you are going to see this, BUT ILYYY THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR COMMENTS <333

Chapter 32: Babysitting

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Dark Cacao Cookie is off on a long journey to the Hollyberry Kingdom for a few weeks, leaving Pure Vanilla Cookie to play nanny for his children.

The only problem? They haven’t actually been children for many, many years, now.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: None

Prompt: “pure vanilla doing some step fathering to dc’s kids but the issue is they’re adults so its a teeny awkward hehe (but its solved st the endd)”

 

“I shall return within two weeks, but I make no promises,” Dark Cacao Cookie warned. “Hollyberry Cookie tends to.. drag out events.”

“I know just as well as you do, my love,” Pure Vanilla Cookie said with a small chuckle.

“Hmph. Be happy you aren’t obligated to be there,” the king said, leaning down to press a small kiss to the back of his husband’s hand, earning him a small flush that would hopefully give him enough satisfaction to last the journey.

The king would be off for a business meeting for fourteen days – which, knowing their dear mutual friend, could very well be fifteen or sixteen. Fourteen (or more) days, which left Pure Vanilla to care for the small army of children his husband had gathered over the years.

Hm.

They were not very childlike, Pure Vanilla realised as his staff focused on the trio a few steps back. They were, actually, very much adult-looking. For starters, Dark Choco Cookie seemed to have outgrown the healer already, and Caramel Arrow Cookie looked like she’d been the one ruling the Dark Cacao Kingdom for ten years already. Crunchy Chip Cookie was short enough to pass as a child… until one noticed the whiskers that threatened to grow into a beard without the King’s careful comments.

Pure Vanilla hummed thoughtfully, the staff’s eyes staring at Dark Cacao’s children for a little too long to be fully comfortable.

Right. Children. He knew how to handle those. Not children that looked like they paid taxes, though.

“So.” Pure Vanilla cleared his throat. “Who can show me around?”

“You have been here at least twenty times,” Dark Choco remarked.

“Yes, but the last time was at least two years ago,” Pure Vanilla exclaimed, playfully impatient (which, judging by the concern in their eyes, all the children took very seriously). “I’m sure Dark Cacao Cookie likes to switch things up.”

“Not really,” Caramel Arrow said.

“It matters not!” Pure Vanilla said cheerfully. “Your father left your safety in my hands, and I shall not fail him. Come inside now, children, I am cold.”

The three shared a look, before following Pure Vanilla into the Citadel.

 

“Clearly, this is going to be a long week,” Crunchy Chip mumbled under his breath.

The ‘children’ were huddled together a few feet away from their babysitter, hoping to be out of earshot so they could discuss this diabolical change of plans.

“This is ridiculous!” Caramel Arrow whispered angrily. “Why did his Majesty think this was a good idea?!”

“Trusting his judgement, are we?” Dark Choco said meaningfully.

“I’m still not going to argue with him about the Wall.”

“Focus on the present,” Crunchy Chip hissed. “Babysitter. Constant observation. Terror.”

“I say we ditch him somewhere in the woods,” Dark Choco suggested, before sighing at the horrified looks he received. “Oh, don’t be like that. I lived there for months and I’m fine!”

“But you had a sword, and he’s blind,” Caramel Arrow said. “And you’re not fine at all.”

“Yeah, and you’re spiteful,” Crunchy Chip added.

“Okay, so you just want to keep him around?” the warrior said, mildly annoyed. “I see no other option.”

“We could try to lose him within the Citadel,” Caramel Arrow proposed. “Disguise yourselves the second you get out of his range of sight.”

“You might be a genius,” Crunchy Chip said.

“Don’t tell her that, she’ll be unbearable for weeks..” Dark Choco muttered.

 

Pure Vanilla looked over at the kids. They seemed to be plotting something, which was worrisome. If they were anything like their father, their plan would be getting themselves in danger as fast as humanly possible.

The healer jumped up with a yelp when, all of a sudden, the kids darted off in three separate directions. The staff’s eyes twisted and spinned in all directions, trying to watch them all at once, which only led to a lot of dizziness.

When he regained proper sight, there was no trace of either of the three and, upon further inspection through the grand hallways of the Citadel, it seemed they were deliberately hiding from him.

“This is a mess..” Pure Vanilla sighed.

 

Crunchy Chip, Caramel Arrow and Dark Choco met up shortly after just outside the gate, each with caps over their heads and filthy clothes.

“Woah,” Crunchy Chip said, looking at his brother, “You look like a murderer.”

Dark Choco frowned at him. “You look like a beggar. An ugly beggar.”

Caramel Arrow came between them when things escalated. “Please shut your mouths before they find out we’re here by your ceaseless yapping.”

Crunchy Chip growled at Dark Choco, which earned him a more concerned frown, but they did as they were told.

“Now,” the archer said, “Here’s what we’re going to do–”

Before she could finish her sentence, two large shadows loomed over them, and they were snatched up by the scruff of their clothes.

Gatekeeper Cookie and Cube Choco Cookie.

The near-permanent guardians of the Citadel’s gate. Big, burly men with peanuts for brains. Caramel Arrow could slap herself.

“Beggars, by the looks of them,” Cube Choco grumbled.

“Wait, no–” Crunchy Chip protested, but a good shake shut him up.

“Bring ‘em to the king, I say,” Gatekeeper said.

Cube Choco frowned. “Isn’t he away?”

“Is he?”

“Listen to me!” Caramel Arrow commanded. “I am Caramel Arrow Cookie, second in line to the Dark Cacao Throne, and you will let me go right this instant!”

“Ha!” Gatekeeper boomed. “A princess, she says! Princesses don’t wear dirty rags, you idiot.”

“Let’s take them back to the Citadel,” Cube Choco said. “We’ll let his Majesty’s husband decide; he’s a little softer than lord Dark Cacao Cookie, but it’ll have to do!”

“Aye, aye,” Gatekeeper said, saluting (which led to Crunchy Chip being swung around).

The warrior did not have to travel long with his heavy baggage, as Pure Vanilla met them right past the gate, looking a little frantic.

“Oh, good Witches!” He cried out. “Put them down right this instant!”

Gatekeeper blinked and dropped the cookies, who fell to the ground unceremoniously.

“What in the world were you thinking?!” Pure Vanilla fussed, rushing to help them up. “Oh, look at these clothes – whose are these?!”

“A maid’s, I think,” Crunchy Chip said sheepishly.

“You stole a poor worker’s clothes for this silly little joke?!”

“I.. apologise, my lord,” Caramel Arrow said shamefully.

The earnest in her voice placated Pure Vanilla, and he deflated with a sigh. “Oh, you are very well forgiven. Your father was worse when he was your age. You!”

Gatekeeper Cookie, who was standing around uselessly, jumped up when the monarch addressed him, saluting clumsily. “Yes, sire?”

“Go back to your post. Dark Cacao does get so prissy about constant guard watches.”

Gatekeeper saluted again and went off towards the gate, leaving Pure Vanilla and the three ducklings alone.

“We’d best get back to the Citadel, now,” Pure Vanilla said, turning around. “All this stress is not good for my old dough.”

Caramel Arrow, Dark Choco and Crunchy Chip followed him, a little embarrassed in their filthy clothes.

“So..” Crunchy Chip said, jogging to keep up with Pure Vanilla’s long strides, “What was that about his Majesty doing worse?”

Chapter 33: THE HEIR

Summary:

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

The new heir to the Dark Cacao Throne is born.

Dark Cacao Cookie does not fare well.

─── ∘°❉°∘ ───

Notes:

Genre: Fluff, slight angst

Warnings: None

Prompt: “PLEASE CAN WE HAVE PURECACAO WITH NEWBORN BABY CHOCO”

 

 

The king of the Dark Cacao Kingdom had been pacing outside of the healing center for exactly four hours and twenty-two minutes. Pure Vanilla Cookie, would know, as he had been an eye on his husband for a while now.

Finally, one of the healers stepped out and, seeing Dark Cacao looking more than a little paranoid, decided to start talking in a hushed tone to Pure Vanilla Cookie instead, who looked a lot calmer (and more rational).

Dark Cacao knew not to go against a healer’s wishes, but he had been waiting for ages now, despite the process normally taking less than an hour. He was getting restless.

He had started the creation of his son precisely one week ago; a dough, which he made sure was perfectly made, and a little bit of himself (for which he had chosen a lock of hair and a small piece of his own dough). The final touches, often assisted by healers to aid the process, should not have taken this long.

“And?” Dark Cacao asked anxiously the second the healer disappeared. “What did she say?”

“They are just making sure he is presentable,” Pure Vanilla said calmly. “Just a few more minutes, my love.”

“I care not for ‘presentable’,” Dark Cacao flared up, before sending a slightly apologetic look Pure Vanilla’s way. “I am sorry. I only want to know if my son is alright.”

“He is just fine, dear.”

Dark Cacao’s head snapped over to the door as it opened again, and this time, the healer was accompanied by a bundle of purple blankets. The king rushed over and took the baby, turning around to avoid listening to the speech that followed.

“Is he supposed to be this small?” Dark Cacao asked troubledly.

Pure Vanilla frowned at him. “Is that truly the first thing you ask?”

Dark Cacao shot him a defensive look. “I’m allowed to be worried! He’s my heir, and he looks.. frail.”

“He is your son, also,” Pure Vanilla said with never-ending patience. “He is small because he is a doughling, my love. He will grow.”

Prince Dark Choco Cookie did indeed grow, and fast. Very soon, he was watching the warriors train; and even sooner, he snuck out of classes to join them.

“Your Royal Highness!” the First Watcher cried out, rushing after the now five year old prince, who was looking at an abandoned wooden sword for a suspiciously long time. Alongside him stood Caramel Arrow Cookie, Dark Choco’s best friend, who was four years older and already one of the most talented archers of her age.

Dark Choco let out a groan of frustration as he was scooped up (undignified for a prince his age, he thought himself). 

“Father said I could watch!” He said loudly, kicking against the Watcher’s shins in a failed attempt to be dropped. “You’re going against the king’s orders!”

“I’m sure he didn’t mean during your etiquette training, which you desperately need,” Second Watcher grumbled. “And you -” he pointed at Caramel Arrow – “are not allowed to be such a bad influence on the crown prince!”

She only shrugged. “He said it was fine.”

“If he jumps off the Great Wall, will you follow him?” Second Watcher retorted, walking back to the Citadel with Dark Choco in his arms.

“Isn’t that my duty as a loyal Watcher?!” Caramel Arrow shouted at his back.

 

“Your Majesty,” Second Watcher said, bowing deeply before Pure Vanilla Cookie. “The Crown Prince.”

“Do get up, my dear soldier,” Pure Vanilla said, picking the now sniffling pathetically child up into his arms. “Thank you for retrieving him.”

“Anytime, sire. Is there any way I can be of service otherwise?”

“Yes..” Pure Vanilla said slowly. “Please do avoid mentioning this incident to his father. I do not think Dark Cacao Cookie needs to know… anything his son does wrong outside of training.”