Chapter Text
Joker sat beside Harley on her couch. "..You said you wanted to talk?" Harley asked softly after nearly 20 minutes of silence.
Joker sniffed, then coughed to cover it up. He kept looking at the ground, not meeting her eyes.
"This has something to do with the Bat, doesnt it?" Joker turned to her like a deer caught in headlights.
Harley sighed, a small smile appearing on her lips. "Puddin, I may be your friend now; But I used to be your doctor, remember? Nothing's ever had such an effect on you but the Bat."
Joker looked back to the ground. He came here to talk, yes; but that'd be revealing the Bat's secret identity, when the vigilante had told Joker on his own; because he-
Because he... trusted...Joker.
Realisation dawned on him. He couldnt tell anyone about this- not even Harley.
"I know I asked to talk, but..." He brought his knees up and hugged them close to his chin. "I dont- I dont think I can talk about it, Harls." He rested his forehead on top of his knees.
"... Alright." Harley said before going quiet. For nearly 10 minutes, neither spoke.
"I'm... glad, that you decided to call me. Instead of, y'know..." Joker saw her grimace from the corner of his eye without looking up.
"Cause like, we dont want your new Boyfriend to get freaked out. Right?" He could tell that she was only trying to lighten the mood, but Joker really didnt know if he could hold his tongue if they talked about this right now.
"Harley, Can we please... not talk about him?" He leaned back up to rest his head on the headrest of the couch, looking up at the ceiling.
"Bruce?" She asked incredulously. "Or the Bat?"
Joker shut his eyes. "...yes." Harley huffed. "Welp. Alrighty then."
More silence.
While Joker was more tolerable towards silences now, Harley wasnt.
"You sure you dont wanna talk about it? I am qualified to be of help." Joker opened one eye to look at her. "...We're both ' Qualified ' as ' not sane ', Harley." The woman shrugged. "Touché."
Joker felt himself smile, if only a little.
He's glad he has Harley as his friend.
A few moments later, the door swung open. "Pammy!" Harley jumped up, excited to see her girlfriend back. "Hey Harley." She wraped her hands around her girlfriend as they shared a quick kiss.
"How'd it go?" Harley asked her after they pulled apart. "Really well, actually."
Then the Plant lady finally noticed Joker standing near the couch. "Oh hey. Didnt know you were visiting."
"Heya, Ivy." Joker brought a hand up to greet her. "Batman was really off his game tonight." She turned to quietly tell Harley, who glanced at Joker. He turned away immediately after making eye-contact.
"I'll, uh, go stand in the balcony for a bit. I've been inside too long. You gals catch up with your smooching, yeah?" He chuckled and heard a hesitant " ..Okay, then. " as he walked away.
Leaning on the railings, he looked up at the full moon.
The air was cold,
he closed his eyes.
'So, this whole time, I was with Batman?' His heart fluttered a little despite himself, no longer in his control. But then again, when had it ever been?
He sighed. "So, that happened." He told no one in particular. "What the hell do I do?" He opened his eyes, faced with the sight of the moon, shining bright tonight. It very rarely did, thanks to Gotham's light and air pollution.
"And what the hell am I doing?" He asked the moon. Ridiculous. But at least he could talk to it without revealing a secret that was... entrusted to him. Which he's still not done processing, by the way.
"He told me he trusted me, you know?" He waited a beat, as if waiting for the giant glowing rock in the sky to respond.
Well, if it wasnt going to- because it cant- then he was just going to assume that it was responding. "Wierd. I know!" He whisper-yelled. "I mean, even I wouldnt trust Me-"
This was not the wierdest thing he has done, actually.
He ran a hand through his hair. "This is so wierd." He bit his lower lip.
He was referring to the ' Bruce Wayne is Batman ' situation, not what he himself was doing at the moment.
"If he trusted me enough to tell me that, could he have actually cared?" He stared at the moon with wide, expectant eyes.
"...Screw this. This is stupid." He huffed, looking down as he pouted.
But, did Bruce actually care? It had really, really seemed like he did. 'I mean, it cant all be lies, right?' Joker thought back to every kiss, every touch- Blue eyes looking at him the way no one else did.
They were Boyfriends. They'd Slept Together-
That could NOT have been fake, but-
'But what? There's no room for a but.' Joker's breath quickened. 'Could it have actually been Real? What.. We.. had?'
He tasted blood on his tongue. The nail of his index finger was bloody from picking at his lip.
Joker licked the blood off his fingertip, then his lips.
He froze.
'Did I... Ruin things?'