Chapter Text
She woke up to another crap day.
Crap day to crap day to crap day. They all melded together in a swirling toilet of crap. It was all so crap; it barely had any meaning anymore. Everything sucked. But that's everything. When everything sucks for so long, you start to go numb to it all.
She got dressed. Wasn't hard. Put on her jacket. Good to go. Easier this way. Less time at home the better.
She drifted through the town like a shade. It was all the same. Every goddamn day. It didn't matter if it was a new town. The sun shone so brightly it stung. The people of Hometown chattered away, so cheerful and happy and content with their lives as they always were.
Did you think Susie could even enjoy the townsfolk's secondhand happiness? Their secondhand joy?
No, dumbass. No, of course not. She was never allowed even that.
They always noticed her eventually. It didn't matter who it was. Their voices would shush as they realized her presence, their eyes would lose any sparkle, instead glaring her way. They were afraid of her. And they were right to be. They wanted her to be a monster? They wanted her to fit in, just like all of them? Well, she'd show them a monster. She'd show them the monster they made her.
"Dude, it's Susie…!" she heard that Monster Kid whisper. She heard this one the most. They were neighbors but you wouldn't expect it the way they looked up at her with terror in their eyes.
"So what? I ain't afraid of her." Ah, yes. The more annoying one. Somehow, this snowy bird-thing pissed her off even more than the blue bird. "She's just a bully. Probably gonna get expelled any day now, and then she'll move away. Show her somethin' red and she'll probably run straight at it! Haha!"
They damn well should have been afraid of her. Looks like she'd have to remind them. Again.
She moved through them, walked between Monster Kid and Snowy without so much as a glance at either of them. Their drink clattered onto the concrete, spilling red like blood, sinking into the dirty cracks. She allowed herself a smile.
"Dude, what the hell!"
"Our drink!"
"Oops," she hissed. "Guess I saw red and spilled it."
Snowy didn't laugh. Susie leaned in.
"Hey. Hey."
She moved in closer. The Monster Kid respected her. That kid feared her. There was still defiance in the snowy one, still hurt in that one. He lost his parent recently. Boo hoo. So sad. Oh. Imagine having a family that loves you and cares for you. And you lose it? How terrible. She was moved by his plight. Not. She never had any of those in the first place. Why should she care?
She moved in closer. Both dumb kids simply shivered at her, frozen by her glare. It was so damn easy. So damn easy to give them the monster they expected her to be.
"Spillin' your drink ain't so bad," she whispered. "Next time you dumbasses get in my way, I might just spill your guts instead. How's that sound?"
And like always. It got the reaction she expected. It got her what she wanted. They trembled and stuttered, they clambered to their feet, they struggled against their fight or flight instincts. She saw the way they stiffened, saw the way they gritted their teeth. Would they try attacking her this time? She hoped so. She hoped they'd at least make it hurt.
"Y-you're such a jerk!" Monster Kid whimpered, stumbling away down the street, that stupid cross of theirs jingling. Like any of that crap would protect them.
"Hey! Hey! Where'ya goin'?!" the snowy one yelled, still standing his ground. "We can't keep lettin' her bully us like this!" Oh, this looked good. This one was mad. This one had the fight in him. This one gritted his teeth together in his stupid beak.
"What, no more jokes?" she asked, unable to stop her fangs from grinning. What could be better than this? This was all she had. "Why don't you stop me right now, huh?"
"…!" The snowy freak growled, fire burning in those cold eyes. "Maybe… I…"
"Yeah. Come on. Try me," Susie taunted, voice low so no one else could hear. She leaned closer, right into his face and said, "They'll bury you right next to your mom."
And that. Was. That.
Snowy's eyes went wide. He nearly turned to dust right there. A wave of emotions blew through them so fast, he didn't know what to feel, he didn't know how to feel. Sometimes, Susie learned, sometimes words could hurt so much more than any wound.
He didn't say anything. He simply ran off. Indignant. Terrified. Probably crying. Who was he gonna cry to? His mom? Hah.
…
…
And yet.
…
…
She was left alone. What she wanted. What she always wanted.
…
…
The high never lasted long. That justified rage, that satisfaction with performing her role perfectly, the way they always cried or screamed or ran away, battered and bruised.
It was all crap again.
…
She needed something to eat. Being this hungry never helped. The free milk in the alleyway hadn't been refilled. The flowers in the trash were all right, but she got sick of them. They weren't very filling. She didn't have any money for the diner or the new grocery store.
The idea of rooting through the trash again made her sick to her stomach. Not that she hated what she found. But she hated the way people acted if they found her. The pity. The disgust. She had her dignity, even if she didn't have much of it.
Looks like she'd go to school today.
She took the scenic route. Less likely for people to see her, to gawk at her. Maybe she'd find something to eat. No dice. Not today. She had already picked up most of the good scraps recently.
When she made it to school, she stood and stared it down. Luckily, class had already started, so there was no one to bug her. The school building loomed over her, blotting out the sun, attempting to intimidate her, trying to scare her away. That stupid Deltarune symbol had been emblazoned all over it, making sure everyone knew this school conformed to that make-believe crap.
The only part of the Deltarune symbol she ever liked were the points. Sharp. Edgy. Cruel. She didn't know much about it or the Angel and didn't care to. She just figured the Angel probably smote sinners or stabbed people to death with those triangles or something. Kinda cool, but she never got to hear about those parts, so she was never interested.
She didn't see Ms. Toriel's van here today. The only parking spot in the whole school was empty. Strange. She was never one to be late. It was probably that rotten Kris kid giving her trouble again.
As for the school itself, it was disgustingly clean and well taken care of. Not a speck of moss to nibble at, not a crack in the foundation, not even a smudge on the windows. Ugh. So of course, Susie being the 'terrible and dirty' monster she was, she stuck out like a sore thumb. Whatever. There was nothing to be afraid of in there. There was nothing that mattered in there. Inside or outside.
She went through the doors, shoes squeaking against the linoleum. Empty. Just the way she liked it. No one to bother her, no one to complain about the way she dressed, no one to avert their gaze from her. She skulked through the halls, ignoring the lockers. She didn't know which locker was hers and she would never find out. There wasn't a reason to.
She stopped at the classroom door, looking through the frost-tinted window. That spiky headed wreck of a teacher, Alphys, was jabbering on about something. It didn't matter what she had to say. Susie didn't respect Alphys. No one respected Alphys. No one was even afraid of her. Susie vowed to never let herself get that low.
She kicked open the door. Touch the knob? No way. Everyone would probably just say it was gross where she touched it.
"S-Susie!" Alphys stuttered, turning to her, eyes as wide as the Monster Kid's were. God, she was pathetic. A teacher, practically quivering at the sight of her? At least Monster Kid was a kid or a teen or something. What the hell was Alphys' excuse?
"Am I late," Susie growled. She was starving. She had barely slept. She was already sick of all their stupid faces.
"I was j-just about to start class!" Alphys stuttered, sweating bullets. God, she pissed Susie off. "B-but I was, um, saying… we're out of chalk again! And I-I can't start without chalk! A-and I was… saying! E-everyone is going to get p-punished! It's the third time!"
Oh yeah. The chalk. The chalk. Oh, the poor goddamn chalk. Poor goddamn Alphys. Chalkless. Without any chalk. Susie felt its texture in her pockets. She forgot she was savin' that one.
"D-do you… know… um… something…" Alphys could barely even finish her freakin' sentence, couldn't even accuse Susie properly.
The rest of the class looked on in complete silence. At Susie. Looks of fear, looks of disgust, looks of accusation shot her way, but they meant nothing. That Snowy glared at her the hardest. Oh, but she knew. She knew. He wouldn't speak up. He was pissed. But he wouldn't tell a soul. He'd want to get back at her his own way. Susie couldn't wait for it.
Everyone glared at her. All of them except… one.
The deer girl rose her hand, always so prim and perfect. Teacher's pet was an understatement. She was the teacher's plaything, teacher's toy, teacher's good little slave.
"Maybe there's a box of chalk in the closet?" she suggested. Oh, what a hero she was. What a brave soul, trying to help everyone in the class. It made Susie sick.
"G-great idea!" Alphys suddenly started. "Susie, you were last to arrive! Looks like even Kris is absent today! Will you, um, p-please go get it for me?"
"Whatever," Susie sighed, rolling her eyes. Any excuse, any at all to get rid of her, huh? Well. She wasn't gonna turn down a free meal and a chance to skip class. She turned around and left without even sitting at her desk.
Susie imagined there must have been a sigh of relief from the entire classroom. Who cares. Screw every single one of them. She was getting that chalk and keeping it to herself.
But first…
She grinned, rooting around in her pockets. A little snack to stave off the hunger. She brought the chalk up to her fangs and imagined it screaming, 'Help help! Don't eat me! Alphys needs me! She's so stupid and pathetic and can't do anything without a little piece of chalk!'
CHOMP!
She grinded its bones in her teeth. Tasted almost like pure sugar. Or more like those candy hearts. Susie never got any of those, so she imagined this must be what they tasted like. No wonder people wanted 'em.
Clack, clack…
Damn it! Someone was behind her? She turned around. Sounded like hooves…!
"U-um! H-hi! Susie…!"
That deer girl. The teacher's #2 slave behind the blue bird. She was smiling at Susie, but Susie clearly saw how strained it was, how it threatened to fall apart at any moment.
"Ms. Alphys asked me to come with you to make sure—"
"You saw me. Didn't you," Susie interrupted.
The smile cracked. It always did. The deer's eyes shifted towards the class door. Back to Susie. "I, uh, I, don't…"
Damn, Noelle was annoying. Her perfect blonde hair bristling, her silky brown fur all on end, even that stupid perfect puffball of a tail… She was so scared. And here Susie thought, here she thought, maybe this one's different. Maybe Noelle's different from the rest. She gave me a pencil once.
Stupid. Stupid! What a waste.
"You saw me eat the chalk. Don't lie."
The doe gulped. She didn't run back into the classroom for help. Was she that scared? A deer in headlights? What a lame cliche.
"N-no! I…" She lied through those big buck teeth. She paused and let out a sigh, and for a moment, she didn't seem as scared. "Sorry. I saw."
(She's apologizing?! To ME?!)
Somehow, that just pissed Susie off even more. She quickly strode over to the pretty princess girl and towered over her, barely able to contain her rage.
(She's got some balls to apologize. To me. Like SHE did something wrong? Miss perfect, miss straight A's, miss teacher's pet! Ugh, everyone loves her, don't they? She must think I love her too, doesn't she?!)
Susie placed a hand on the deer girl's shoulder, as gently as she could, even though she was pissed out of her mind. The deer looked at it like the severed hand from Blood Crushers, but she didn't scream.
"Let me tell you a secret," Susie said with a smile. She couldn't contain it. She was angry. So very angry. Because it was so funny. Funny this could even happen.
"Yes…? A-ah!"
The deer girl was cut off. Susie picked her up by the scruff of her ugly Christmas sweater and slammed her into the lockers. The other class wouldn't hear.
"Perfect girls like you piss me off."
And the doe let out a yelp, a tiny pathetic cry at the force of it, her face as red as her nose. What's the deal with her? How is her face going red? She must be embarrassed from getting tossed around like this, no longer the perfect student at the front of the class.
"You're gonna tell on me, aren't you."
The deer's chest inhaled and exhaled rapidly. She could barely speak, looking up at Susie with terror and… and… something else. Susie couldn't place it. What the hell was wrong with this girl?
"Wouldn't that be perfect for you, hm, perfect girl?" Susie hissed, leaning closer to her trembling little face, her shivering nose, her blushing snout. "Tell on me, get some more credit from the teacher, and I probably get expelled from all the crap I've done. Bet'cha want that, don't you?"
That's what it was! That's what that look was! Terror! And want! This sick little freak…! She wanted Susie expelled that bad? Wanted to kick Susie out of town that much? She was the mayor's daughter, wasn't she? Probably looking out for the town's image, trying to get Susie to move out again…!
The deer didn't answer. She simply trembled, unable to get her mouth to work for once. Susie admitted, she loved seeing the perfect princess struggle so much like this. Tiny little breaths came out of her mouth, but no sound, just gasps and chokes and little cries.
Susie knew it. Silence spoke volumes or whatever. Like that Kris kid. And she HATED Kris. The real nail in the coffin? Susie sniffed. Apple shampoo. Just. Like. Kris. It was subtle, mostly peppermint and pine tree, but oh, she knew. She knew the smell of Kris. Just the thought of taking a bite out of her like a big juicy apple nearly sent her into a frenzy.
"Well," Susie said, heart pounding, adrenaline coursing through her veins. "You want to run me out of town so bad, don't'cha? Get rid of the troublemaker."
The deer couldn't speak. It looked like she was trying to shake her head, trying to lie again, even now as she quivered like a frightened little mouse! Ugh!
"Why don't I go ahead and get expelled for something really nasty, huh? Since you're probably so eager to pull the trigger, to tell the teacher, tell your mommy mayor about what I did."
Still, nothing, but at the mention of her mother, she seemed to quiver less, going almost limp in Susie's grip. Another girl with mommy issues, huh? Get in line.
Susie opened her maw, revealing her disgusting rows of teeth, all misaligned and rusted and sharpened from so much use. She drooled more than usual, her stomach begging for a meal, begging for something decent to eat for once. This girl looked like the perfect snack.
"Why don't I go ahead and rip off that pretty little face of yours then?"
She moved her maw closer, felt the jagged edge of her fangs prick the deer's soft cheeks, and felt the girl let out a cold gasp into her.
(Huh?)
That gasp sent shivers down Susie's back. She pulled away quickly, looking at her terrified prey once more.
(What?! WHAT?!)
The deer girl's eyes winced. Completely normal, sure. But the girl's mouth, her lips! Her stupid little pink lips…! They were…
They were pressed together! Pursed! Like a kiss! Like a KISS.
Susie dropped Noelle's ass to the floor. "The hell is wrong with you?!" She took a step back.
"H-huh? W-what?" The doe looked dazed. "Weren't you… um… going to eat my face?"
Susie's mind reeled. What the hell? What the ever-loving hell? Everyone's reactions were always the same, the exact god damn same! But this girl… She looked more excited than terrified!
"I wasn't going to actually do it!" Susie said, voice cracking, a moment of sincerity breaking out. Damn it. "I mean. Goddamn."
"…Oh…" The girl sighed. She looked down at her hooves. Was she disappointed?! "I'm not going to tell anybody, you know. About the chalk. Or the… um… face… thing. Hee…"
No, no. No.
Susie understood it now. It was a defense mechanism. That was it. That was it!! And look how well it worked! Get in danger? Pretend you're gonna kiss your attacker! Pretty girl like that, of course it'd work! Of course! Stupid, stupid, Susie! You let her get away with it!
Well! Whatever! Who cares. That trick won't work next time. It didn't matter. She never wanted to bully this girl anyway. Probably cuz of psychology or something, she figured.
"Let's just get the chalk. Come on, freak."
Susie grumbled down the hall, trying to make sense of her thoughts. It didn't matter. She'd get the chalk and maybe have a quick lunch and give Alphys the rest. Then she could sit at her desk and pretend she gave a damn. This deer girl—she seemed like she wasn't going to snitch. But you could never trust those types. With the blink of an eyelash, wag of a cute puffy tail, they'd have you in the palm of their hand, making you a laughingstock to the whole school.
She wouldn't let that happen again.
Clack…Clop…Clack…
Susie groaned, swiveling to the deer. "Can you walk a little slower?! Or do you need me to hold your damn hand?!"
Noelle jumped. She fidgeted. "… … Yeesss…?"
Susie was dumbfounded. "What do you mean—ugh, you know what, come on, let's just get going." She was already tired of dealing with this.
When they got to the supply closet, Susie noted that Noelle seemed to be tailing behind closer already. (Really working for that teacher's pet award, aren't you?)
"Let's just get this over with," Susie grumbled, flinging the doors open.
Darkness flung her back. Noelle shrieked. (Annoying.)
Darkness oozed its way out of the closet doors, as if little tendrils of shadow skittered and reached out across the tile. It glowed with darkness, a description that Susie could barely understand. Susie was never sure just what the supply closet looked like, but goddamn, they could do some work. It was creepy as hell. No matter what angle she tried to view it at, it just looked black. Dark. She couldn't even visualize a single shape in there.
Didn't seem right, to be honest.
"Noelle," Susie said, trying to stay calm. She hoped she wasn't failing. "Noelle, uh. Is the supply closet usually this… … dark?"
For once, Noelle wasn't just staring at Susie. Her eyes were lost in that darkness, threatening to be enveloped. Luckily, or unluckily as Susie would put it, she quickly returned her gaze to Susie and said, "Um… I don't think so. The light bulb must have gone out or something…"
"The light bulb," Susie repeated, staring at the yawning void before them, highlighting Noelle's bright colors in dark void.
Noelle smiled sheepishly. "… Maybe?"
Susie thought about this. Basements and stuff like that were pretty creepy when the lights didn't work. She reminisced over a few cheap horror flicks in her mind. Yeah. Yeah. When the lights went out in those, it always got real scary. That must have meant it was a simple case of missing lights. Which also meant she was getting scared of nothing.
(I am NOT getting scared.)
She turned to the doe. That one was practically quivering in her hooves again, scooching ever closer to Susie for protection. What an idiot. She wasn't gonna get protected by Susie of all people.
"Whatever. Let's just get this over with. Come on."
Susie expected Noelle to protest. She simply nodded and replied, "O-okay!" even as she practically cowered behind Susie.
(Welp. Can't back down now.)
Susie stepped closer. Still as dark as ever, still impossible to see anything. Noelle hovered close behind her, frankly way closer than she needed to be. (Girl's got a death wish.)
Argh, this was all too annoying! And taking too long! It'd take forever to get them both in the closet! Time to rip the band-aid off!
Susie grabbed Noelle by the wrist, the fragile doe letting out a squeak of a shriek and dashed into the dark.
Unfortunately, this wasn't a great idea. The moment Susie's shoe hit the ground inside of the closet, she noted a vitally important detail. Her shoe did not in fact 'hit the ground inside of the closet' and instead hit nothing at all. Nada. Jack. The list would have gone on if the two of them hadn't started plummeting at an alarming rate.
Susie's heart felt like it exploded and finally she let out a surprised shout of her own, Noelle shrieking like a banshee the entire way, clinging to Susie for deer life.
They fell and fell and fell and fell and fell and the darkness grew and grew and grew. It consumed them, devoured them, ate them, and all the while Noelle gripped Susie way too hard.
Even as they fell to what was certainly their death, Susie noted strangely, could have been worse. A cute girl dying right there with her? She honestly expected a way worse way to go, albeit maybe not today.
And it all went darker, darker still.